Unexpected Fluids

Sophie Duker, Gina Martin, Karen Hobbs, Master Dominic, Jamie Windust and Lola Jean help Riyadh and Alix celebrate 50 episodes! We bring you the Squirties – the first Unexpected Fluids Awards celebrating your tales of sexual fail, from First Fumble to Best Solo and Ensemble Performances and the Keep Calm And Carry On Award. Plus who will be the Sexual Hero of the Year? Big thanks to all our winners and to everyone who’s shared stories this season. Unexpected Fluids wouldn’t be the same without you!

When did you last get checked? After this week’s episode with Nathaniel Hall, Alix and Riyadh explore STI testing by getting a little prick each… in the finger. What happens when you go into a clinic? Are there STIs we don’t know about? Why should you get checked? And Alix reveals why HIV testing is a topic close to her heart.If you’ve been affected by any of the issues raised in this podcast you can get help at the Radio 1 Advice pages on our website.

The first time Nathaniel Hall had sex he contracted HIV. Nathaniel, a theatre maker, actor and campaigner from Stockport tells his story, including resisting telling his mum, making an award winning theatre show about his life... and dressing up as a Christmas pudding in an airport! Plus both Nathaniel and listener Barney reveal tales of getting caught with their pants down, and listener Stella takes a tumble in a Hungarian hostel.If you've been affected or want to learn more about the topics in this episode, head to the BBC Advice pages online.

Welcome to the first of Extra Splash mini episodes. We had a flood of emails from you about abstinence after the Kelsey De Almeida episode. Why do some people choose it? Can going fap-free improve your sex life and beyond? What are No Fap November and Locktober?This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Rose Johnson on having Pointless sex, wedding nights and Edinburgh one night stands; Darren Harriott on circumcision and learning about love from R&B; Alix gets a sexy surprise and we all get an education in cruising. Recorded live from the BBC Tent at Edinburgh Fringe.Thank you everyone sharing stories on the night. This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Are actors more or less real in bed? Can a tampon get lost inside you? What’s with all the sex fog in films? All these questions and more are answered in our second sex-on-screen special, in which Aimee Lou Wood from Sex Education shares an incredible story of her own sexual fail and talks about how unsexy it was filming sex scenes with her now IRL beau Connor Swindells. Thanks for all your stories, especially listener Emma, who tells us about the time she re-enacted a film with disastrous consequences.*LIVE EPISODE ALERT!* Would you like to come along to our 50th episode recording? We’ll be holding the first ever Squirties aka the Unexpected Fluids Awards on Tues 15th October in London. Register for free tickets here http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1 (registration closes 10am on Fri 11th October).This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Can award winning porn director Erika Lust make our sexual fails sexy? We also hear why a member of her crew had to hold a bed for 45 minutes, how she is disrupting the industry and listener Tallulah shares a story involving an inventive way of smuggling a diamond.

Christian virgin Kelsey de Almeida on escaping the women trying to deflower him, why his parents offered to help him get laid and religious porn. We also had a flood of emails about squirting with some surprising results… This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Comedian Josh Jones on foot festishes, foreskin clothes pegs and finding and owning his voice, Alix and Riyadh get to know him from top to bottom. Plus the very specific world of Sonic the Hedgehog porn… This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Comedian Lily Phillips dives deep into stories of vulvas, underwater rope bondage and dog periods. Big thanks to Steve for sharing a tale of a workplace romance gone epically wrong. Plus if you say cystitis into the mirror three times do you get a UTI forever? This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Helen Bauer talks about her dad’s porn search history, why Zoe Coombs Marr is always offered semen and the glorious return of Adam Rowe; there’s a fistful of comedy talent live from the BBC Tent at Edinburgh Fringe.Thank you to Chris, Jack, Mel and Natalie for sharing stories. This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

The holder of the world record for most volume of squirting, sex educator Lola Jean, joins Alix and Riyadh. Exploring myths, male squirting and muscle groups, we’re gushing with pride to be back for Series 4.Thank you to Jenny and Kirsty for sharing stories. This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! If you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Series 4 is coming, plus we return to Edinburgh Fringe Festival! On the 18th August we’ll be recording two special episodes in Edinburgh and we want you there! Expect filth, fun and the finest stand-up comedy, get your free tickets here: https://www.bbc.co.uk/edinburghticketsWe’re also planning an awards ceremony (yes really), and although Alix and Riyadh don’t agree on the name, they do agree that they want more of your stories! If things have ever gone slightly awry in the bedroom, send your tales of sexual fails to [email protected] and who knows, you could be a winner!

Investigating a legendary medical myth, unsolicited dick pics and an (almost) killer story, we’re mopping up Series 3. Packed with outtakes and extras, there are also cleaning tips for dodgy stains on the walls. Thank you to everyone who submitted stories for Series 3. This podcast wouldn’t be the same without you! We’ll be back soon for Series 4, so if you have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

From the tooth guy to labelling, comedian Desiree Burch shares titbits from life as virgin dominatrix, being a bisexual and the differences between sex in the US and UK. Thanks to Sam and Alexander for sharing tales of safe words and telephone guidance…

How not to experiment with coldplay, how many batteries you should take to a swingers party in Jamaica and what to do if your bank manager calls you up at work... when you work as a cam girl. Florence and Reed aka Come Curious share what they've learned from their podcast and online channel. And thanks to Richard; his great story has a hole in it.

The worst/best videos teachers showed you, Harry’s Tumblr life and his dad’s unusual approach to sex education. We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Pornstar and viral sensation Sophie Anderson joins Alix and Riyadh to talk all things porn; from fear of joining the industry to becoming an LGBT icon. Plus she reveals stories of when watersports goes wrong, driving the ‘Fake Taxi’ and the perils of numbing cream.

Love Island’s Dr Alex reveals his most bizarre sexual A&E stories, why he ‘abstained’ on the show and the perils of dating when famous. Plus Alix reads a WILD listener story that ends with one hospital visit, two concerned parents and a near concussion. We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share, email us [email protected].

Award winning comedian and wheelchair user Aaron Simmonds talks strip Harry Potter Trivial Pursuit, phantom limbs and manscaping.Additional production support provided by BBC Ouch.

Sex parties, Iraqi families and being non-binary in the gay dating scene with drag performer and filmmaker Amrou Al-Kadhi. Thanks to Victoria for sharing a story of an overpopulated jacuzzi! We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Comedian Stephen Bailey talks about the problem with big penises, and what he learned from Paris Hilton’s sex tape. Plus a listener shares the perils of post-coital politics. We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Comedian Fran Bushe talks about squirting workshops, sex camp and the perils of vaginal eggs in her quest for better sex. Plus Alix reads one of the most intense stories we’ve ever had on the pod. We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected]

Munroe Bergdorf joins Alix and Riyadh to talk about porn preferences, awkward threesomes, joining the mile high club and trans lingerie. After last week’s chat about objectophilia, Alix challenges Munroe and Riyadh to a game of sex toy or rollercoaster. We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected] *for the backstory on Barbie listen to Season 2 episode 6 with Adam Rowe. *for the backstory on the pistol listen to Season 1 episode 1 with The Slumflower

We’ve cleaned up our act for Series 3. Ethan the naked cleaner joins Riyadh Khalaf and Alix Fox, sharing how to avoid bleach near your bits, hoarders’ houses and the worst fluid/surface combo to clean. Thanks to Alex for sharing a story of what could have been… We’re still recording the series, so if have a hilarious real-life tale of sexual fail you want to share you can email us [email protected] *for the backstory on the milking machine listen to Master Dom’s episode in Season 1

We’re warming up for Series 3, with loads more of your hilarious tales of sexual fail. We’re still recording the series, so if you’d like to send us a story email us! [email protected]

Jack Ladd has written an erotic tale of Alix and Riyadh. Could this happen IRL? You’ll have to wait for Series 3 to find out. We’ll be back in early 2019. In the meantime, if you have a hilarious (real life) tale of sexual fail let us know – [email protected]

Relax in the afterglow of the epic session that was Series 2. Alix and Riyadh show each other their favourite bits – featuring Jason Dorito, the hidden condom, where Barbie was and more. If you only listen to one episode make it this one. Thanks to all the anons for sharing stories this series! If you have a hilarious tale of sexual fail for Series 3 let us know – [email protected]

Warning: contains explicit punograpy. The real 360 annual appraisal, Channing Tatum’s journey from stripper to fawn and what your barista is really doing in the stockroom… comedian Samantha Baines reads your stories of sex going wrong at work, and Riyadh finally breaks the seal and becomes a pundamentalist.

There’s a fine line that we obviously crossed so you didn’t have to. Erotic writer Jack Ladd discusses throuples, double penetration and sub-spacing.

Broken lipsticks, iron bedframes and eye surgery… when things aren’t what they seem. Comedian Brennan Reece reads your stories and discovers during the recording that he likes nipples.

Warming up, getting hot, the storm before the calm… just don’t call it foreplay; Alix explains why she doesn’t like the word. Plus your stories of licking, kissing, farting and, er, inappropriately timed blood and Little Britain. Fern Brady reads your stories

Cruising on a family holiday, how to self-pleasure while sharing a room and a disastrous encounter with the army; Malta’s first comedy drag queen Chucky Bartolo aka Tolqueen helps Alix and Riyadh read your stories. Alix shares stories from Japan’s largest sex store and Riyadh reveals his passion for aviation. Recorded live in Malta.

Rogue toenails, over friendly dogs and awful advice from mums all feature in our Sloppy Seconds tales this week, mopping up the best stories on previous themes. Marvin from 1Xtra’s 3 Shots of Tequila reads your stories and reveals some of his own surprising habits.

Comedian Olga Koch joins Alix & Riyadh to talk sex shops including numerous tales from sales assistants on the frontline

Comedian Sarah Keyworth joins Alix & Riyadh to talk about all the scoffing and boffing! When playing with food goes either completely right of completely wrong.

Comedian Harriet Kemsley helps Alix and Riyadh read the worst sex tips you’ve ever been given, from ginger to plastic bags…

Adam Rowe wangs on about dongs with Alix and Riyadh, reading your stories of penis pleasure and pain… From Barbies and banjos.

Wipe down your walls and grab a towel, the vagina episode is here! Kemah Bob is IUD AF. Thanks to all the anons for sharing your stories!

From badly copied porn to mis-sent sexts, Lou Sanders reads your stories of tech crashing your sex life.

The scents that get you horny and the stinks that turn you off. Comedian Lauren Pattison gets up close and personal with bodily smells and makes a call to answer a rather intimate question.

From saunas to cars, your tales of doing it outside the bedroom. With film director Desiree Akhavan on sex parties, sploshing and cake farts!

Unexpected Fluids returns, bigger and wetter than ever live from Edinburgh! With Kiri Pritchard-Mclean, Larry Dean and your stories of an inflatable whale, Mr Blobby and vomit.

Love Island's Samira on hiding mics on set, queefs and sex myths you used to believe. Much to Riyadh's disappointment Alix debunks the most far-fetched urban myth she's ever heard

From shower gel to pregnancy, comedians Norris & Parker tell your tales of kinks gone wrong. A listener caught in a hogtie prompts the biggest, weirdest tangent of the series...

Shane Jenek aka Courtney Act mops up your stories, how to self-pleasure in the Big Brother house, malfunctions with tape and gender fluidity. Plus what not to use as a butt plug.

From rope ties and yoga lies to the toys which will never get made and some very awkward train journeys, your stories gave us a buzz! With Monty Onanuga.

Who knew kissing could escalate this quickly? BDSM dominant Master Dominic on your stories of spit, snot and serious spanking. Just don't mention "that book" or you're in trouble.

It’s a hard life for male strippers… comedian Aurie Styla lays bare some secrets for Alix Fox and Riyadh Khalaf. Plus your nakedly honest tales of stripping fails...

Keeping it brief, Alix's are like a cat's cradle and Riyadh's got his pants pants on. Plus household objects NOT to try at home.