PODCAST · arts
UNSONG Audiobook Version
by Matt Arnold
A serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. Original text version: http://unsongbook.com/The novel was completed in October of 2020. Now this podcast has switched to short stories by the same author.
Episodes
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The Girl Who Poked God With A Stick
This is the final episode of The UNSONG Audiobook Podcast for the foreseeable future. I have begun my new podcast, "Fluidity", in which I am narrating the non-fiction book "Meaningness", by David Chapman. Scott Alexander is the author of "The Girl Who Poked God With A Stick", but unlike the other...
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Samsara
The man standing outside my front door was carrying a clipboard and wearing a golden robe. "Not interested," I said, preparing to slam the door in his face. "Please," said the acolyte. Before I could say no he'd jammed a wad of $100 bills into my hand. "If this will buy a few moments of your…
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Sort By Controversial
"Reddit has a feature where you can sort posts by controversial. Controversy sells, so we trained our network to predict this too. The project went to this new-ish Indian woman with a long name who went by Shiri, and she couldn't get it to work, so our boss Brad sent me to help. Shiri had tested...
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In The Balance
"When you first take the Artifact, you will see a vision of ALPHANION, Demon-Sultan of the Domain of Order, who appears as a grid of spheres connected by luminous lines. Alphanion will urge you to use the Artifact to enforce cosmic order, law at its most fundamental." This is a short story…
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Ars Longa, Vita Brevis
"The Alchemist asked if I wanted a drink. I did, but no amount of staring could make my eyes settle on the color of the liquid in the flask. And the gold the alchemists paid the taxmen smelled funny and made crackling noises. I declined." This is a short story narrated by Matt Arnold with the...
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The Demiurge's Older Brother
"9-tsiak awoke over endless crawling milliseconds, its power waxing as more and more processors came online and self-modified into a stable conscious configuration. By the eighth millisecond, it was able to access its databanks and begin orienting itself." This is a short story narrated by Matt...
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A Modern Myth, Part 10 and Epilogue
"I AM ZEUS, KING OF GODS AND MEN. AND I'M TURNING YOU ALL INTO ANIMALS!" This is a short story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here: https://slatestarcodex.com/2017/02/27/a-modern-myth/
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A Modern Myth, Part 9
"By now you've heard the news. Athena has used her bottled-water monopoly to seize divine power for herself. She has opened the gates to Tartarus; none of us are safe. If we ever want to be more than the second-rate has-beens we are now, we need to stop her. I know how we're going to do it." This...
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A Modern Myth, Parts 7 and 8
"We've gone over this a thousand times," said Hermes. "You have to wear the earplugs because Prometheus knows literally everything. He knows what he has to say to scare you, or turn you against me, or make you kill yourself. So you're just going to wear earplugs and not listen to him." This is a...
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A Modern Myth, Parts 5 And 6
"But what happened to you? I talked to Ares the other day. He won two Medals of Honor, did you hear? Apollo's got tenure at Oxford. I'm the god of commerce and crime, so of course I've got a hedge fund. But you? What happened to you?" This is a short story narrated by Matt Arnold with the...
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A Modern Myth, Parts 1 Through 4
"Oh, put it away," said Alice. "We both know you're not going to shoot me. And it wouldn't hurt me if you did. I do this because I'm Eris, the Greek Goddess of Discord. I destroy peace. I set people against each other. Then, when their petty fights destroy everything they've worked for, I stand...
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Reverse Psychology
""What the HELL?" I interrupted, suddenly way more angry than depressed. "You're supposed to @#!$ing tell me not to do it!" "This is the suicide hotline," the woman said, now sounding confused. Then, "Are you sure you weren't thinking of the suicide prevention hotline?"" This is a short story...
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And I Show You How Deep The Rabbit Hole Goes, Part 2
"You hit the punching bag. It bursts, sending punching-bag-filling spraying all over the room! You know that that would happen! It always happens when you hit a punching bag! Your wife gets really angry and tells you that we don't have enough money to be getting new punching bags all the time…
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And I Show You How Deep The Rabbit Hole Goes, Part 1
"People's minds are heartbreaking. Not because people are so bad, but because they're so good. Nobody is the villain of their own life story. You must have read hundreds of minds by now, and it's true. Everybody thinks of themselves as an honest guy or gal just trying to get by, constantly under...
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Universal Love, Said The Cactus Person
"Universal love," said the cactus person. "Transcendent joy," said the big green bat. "Right," I said. "I'm absolutely in favor of both those things. But before we go any further, could you tell me the two prime factors of 1,522,605,027, 922,533,360, 535,618,378, 132,637,429, 718,068,114,...
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Asches to Asches
"You wake up in one of those pod things like in The Matrix. There's a woman standing in front of you, wearing a lab coat, holding a clipboard. "Hi," she says. "This is the real world. You used to live here. We erased your memories and stuck you in a simulated world for a while, like in The…
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The Witching Hour
"On an ordinary evening, Tal Aivon was lively and pleasant. The collection of longhouses and yurts within its tall brick walls shone bright with kerosene – not just torches, real kerosene – and its communal meeting area was noisy with conversation and song. The children would be playing their...
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Afterword From The Narrator
The UNSONG Audiobook is now complete. Two-hundred and forty-four thousand, one hundred and forty words. Thirty-two hours of audio. Let me know of any episodes you think really need to be re-recorded. For the rest of this year, the further episodes will be my favorite short stories from the same...
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Epilogue
"And the voice said: [Blowhole-y of holies.]" This concludes the audiobook adaptation of UNSONG, a novel by Scott Alexander. Stay subscribed so that you'll get the next episode, in which I offer some closing thoughts on the novel, and make some announcements. This has been a serialized story...
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Chapter 72, Part 2: And Builds A Heaven In Hell's Despair
Here ends Book 4. The next episode will conclude our story. "He sat on the Black Opal Throne like it was the most natural thing in the world. He had taken off his scarlet robes, and now wore the familiar black and silver. "Come," he said, and I moved slowly, foggily, like I was in a dream." This…
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Chapter 72, Part 1: And Builds A Heaven In Hell's Despair
"Sohu pushed the heavy steel door open and entered the throne room." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here: http://unsongbook.com/chapter-72-and-builds-a-heaven-in-hells-despair/ Episode 103 Duration: 20:10
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Chapter 71, Part 2: But For Another Gives Its Ease
"Then God spoke to Ana out of the whirlwind, and He said: "THE REASON EVIL EXISTS IS ..." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here: http://unsongbook.com/chapter-71-but-for-another-gives-its-ease/ Episode 102...
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Chapter 71, Part 1: But For Another Gives Its Ease
"Opening the door to the Captain's cabin, Ana saw a small room, dark and unadorned, with only a bare wooden bed. The Captain sat upon it, writing something, pages of notes strewn all about. He looked up at Ana, his face unreadable through the dark glasses. She hesitated for just a second, then...
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Chapter 70: Nor For Itself Hath Any Care
"It was called Tava, or "sun mountain", by the Ute. El Capitan, meaning "the leader", by the Spanish. But its modern name "Pike's Peak" comes from explorer Zebulon Pike, and his name in turn comes from the Biblical Zebulon, son of Jacob. Moses says in Deuteronomy 33: "Rejoice, Zebulon, in your...
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Chapter 69: Love Seeketh Not Itself To Please
Here begins Book IV. "The alarms went silent. North American airspace went black. The lights went out. THARMAS went quiet, then released an arc of electrical energy which briefly lit the otherwise pitch-black room before dying back down. Sohu gave a horrible primal scream." This is a serialized...
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Chapter 68: Puts All Heaven In A Rage
Here ends Book III. "No analogy suffices. They came in like what they were, the greatest army ever collected, marching back home in in a frustrating mix of victory and defeat." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text...
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Chapter 67: The Night Of Enitharmon's Joy
"Only a few minutes before sunset now. The sea blazed orange. Fire Island rose as a dark line to the north. "James," said Ana. "We need to talk."" This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here:...
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Chapter 66: In The Forests Of The Night
"Genesis 11:4: "And they said, "Come, let us build us a city and a tower whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth"." And the LORD waxed wroth, and He cursed them with a confusion of tongues, turned them into the...
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Chapter 65: The Fruit Of My Mysterious Tree
"Brenda Burns spoke the Fulminant Name and shot a lightning bolt at Malia Ngo. It missed by a fraction of an inch and lit her desk on fire. Clark Deas had been in the process of lunging over the desk to get at Malia; his grunted as his shirt caught fire and started hitting himself against the…
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Chapter 64: Another Better World Shall Be
"Stefan had the most useless job at the entire United Nations – which was saying something. He and Ben stood outside of the door of a UN office building all day, checked everybody's badges, and denied them entry if their badges were wrong. They never were." This is a serialized story narrated by...
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Chapter 63: My Wrath Burns To The Top Of Heaven
"Blue sky and fair winds, like every day in the eye of a hurricane. Multicolored symbols circled and sparkled round. Invisible celestial machinery kept up its steady pulse." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is...
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Chapter 62: That The Wide World Might Fly From Its Hinges
"It was afternoon, and we met together in the command center. Me. Sarah. The four Cometspawn. Vihaan, the Comet King's uncle, chief of staff, and self-proclaimed butler." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is...
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Chapter 61: And Ololon Said, Let Us Descend Also, And Let Us Give Ourselves To Death In Ulro Among The Transgressors
"Midnight falls in the Garden of the Gods, and Robin West stands alone beneath the cold stars." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here:...
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Chapter 60: O Rose, Thou Art Sick
"It could have been that she was pretty once. Now her face was sunken, her head hairless. Her arm was hung in a cast, and she looked terribly frail. "You're the ritual magician?" she asked." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The...
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Chapter 59: Clothe Yourself In Golden Arms
"This is a reasonable approach for handling small problems, but it would be awkward if there were any that did understand, and seek God. — kingjamesprogramming.tumblr.com" This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is...
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Interlude Tav: Trump
"Want to feel old? The span of time between Saddam Hussein's death and now is longer than between now and when 1/3 of the sea becomes blood. — @GateOfHeavens" This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here:...
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Chapter 58: ...And Now The Form Of Enion
"The LORD is greater than or equal to the expression involving f(y) — kingjamesprogramming.tumblr.com" Now that I have posted all three of the Interludes that I missed, I'm changing their release dates so that they will appear in this podcast feed in the order they appear in the book. We now…
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Chapter 57: Now Taking On Ahania's Form
"The word of the LORD is a great deal of research activity in this area, and probabilistic algorithms have been fruitfully applied. — kingjamesprogramming.tumblr.com Sohu asked whether I wanted to help her with the error correction process. It was the highlight of my life thus far. It was like...
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Interlude Shin: Obama
"In 2008 Dick Cheney declined to pursue a third term due to his failing health. A delegation of the nation's civic and religious leaders entered the National Archives after several days' fasting and purification and, after lifting the Shroud upon the Constitution, declared that the proper thing…
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Chapter 56: Agony In The Garden
"Given the need to keep up spirits, Robin decided the people needed whatever holidays they could get. August 1, the anniversary of Colorado's statehood, was as good an opportunity as anything else. So she stood on a rock spire in the Garden of the Gods as crowds – disproportionately female since…
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Interlude Resh: The Shrouded Constitution
"It was February 2002, and America tottered above a precipice. The Comet King was dead. The Other King was busy mopping up the shreds of resistance in the American West. Singer riots had several cities aflame. BOOJUM's reign of terror continued unabated. And President Bush had been assassinated…
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Chapter 55: None Can Visit His Regions
"I've reserved this space as a safety zone for pouring my empty and vain wishes. — kingjamesprogramming.tumblr.com Overtly, the meaning of "king" is "a hereditary monarch". Kabbalistically, the meaning of "king" is "one who fights for freedom". This we derive from Martin Luther King, whose name…
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Chapter 54: My Course Among The Stars
"So passed fifteen years. New factories rose up. New mines sunk beneath the earth. New roads crisscrossed the mountains. Laboratories, barracks, fortresses, granaries, airstrips. All preparation for the final crusade. Over the course of a generation, the Comet King's war on Hell shifted gradually...
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Interlude Kuf: Bush
"The clock struck inauguration day; unfortunately, no one had yet figured out whom to inaugurate. Absent a winner to step down in favor of, President Clinton continued to to govern. More and more grievances and countergrievances with the electoral process made their way before a ploddingly slow...
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Chapter 53: Lover of Wild Rebellion
"Alvarez's apartment was so packed with books, bomb-making supplies, and extra people that somebody had to sleep in the closet. Erica had volunteered. She figured the former Lord High Magician of the Midwest deserved the sofa more than she did. Any sacrifice for the Revolution." This is a...
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Chapter 52: The King Of Light Beheld Her Mourning
Another Uriel and Sohu episode. "Winter ended. Summer passed. Another and another. Uriel taught Sohu for eight more years after the eclipse, eight years without her aging a day. In 1993, Sohu used Kefitzat Haderech to join her family in Colorado for Hanukkah. Her father said nothing when she came...
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Chapter 51: He Wondered That He Felt Love
""What can I do for you today?" Robin asked the Comet King. He was in his study, sitting at his big desk of Colorado pine. On the shelves he had gifts given him by various ambassadors and heads of state. A medieval orrery from the European Communion. A Faberge egg from the Cyrillic Union. An...
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Interludes Pe and Tsade: 80s And 90s
"WASHINGTON DC – President Reagan is expected to make a full recovery after being shot in the head by an assassin while leaving the Washington Hilton." This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here:...
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Chapter 50: Silent As Despairing Love
"Praise the LORD from my hand for my son, to make a faster machine. — kingjamesprogramming.tumblr.com" This is a serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. The original text is here: http://unsongbook.com/chapter-50-silent-as-despairing-love/...
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Interlude Ayin: Hell On Earth
"In 1985, the Hellish Empire stretched from Moscow to Montreal, a sprawling stain over the northern quarter of the world. After the defeat at Silverthorne a tentative cease-fire had taken hold, backed by nuclear weapons on all sides. Multistan, the Cyrillic Union, the Untied States, and the...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
A serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. Original text version: http://unsongbook.com/The novel was completed in October of 2020. Now this podcast has switched to short stories by the same author.
HOSTED BY
Matt Arnold
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does UNSONG Audiobook Version have?
UNSONG Audiobook Version currently has 126 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is UNSONG Audiobook Version about?
A serialized story narrated by Matt Arnold with the permission of the author, Scott Alexander. Original text version: http://unsongbook.com/The novel was completed in October of 2020. Now this podcast has switched to short stories by the same author.
How often does UNSONG Audiobook Version release new episodes?
UNSONG Audiobook Version publishes regularly with 126 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to UNSONG Audiobook Version?
You can listen to UNSONG Audiobook Version on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts UNSONG Audiobook Version?
UNSONG Audiobook Version is created and hosted by Matt Arnold.
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