PODCAST · arts
Visible… “ they see you”
by Ramses routier Jr
I was 16 when I was diagnosed with primary progressive multiple sclerosis, it really began with relapsing remitting but we will get to the specifics on this journey
Episodes
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Time for college
I had a really good off-season and was excited for school, the loss of the state championship was far behind me
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Measure of focus
Now that we are looking pretty good on the field, my body wasn’t feeling the way many thought it was looking and I knew I needed a plan so I started to draw one up
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Dedication & dedicated
It was time that everybody was made aware of what was going on with me but what was going to be my new plan because the roosters were coming home to roost for athletics
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My moment of truth
Going public with my illness was probably the most difficult thing I had to do simply because I was struggling with coming to grips with some thing that others would probably be doing the same
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Commitment
Understanding that commitment went so much further and having pivotal people in my life to help me understand that keeps me so very grateful
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Harsh reality
We have a team we’re doing well, my health was not but I still had a focus on what I wanted to see, a focus of a change I wanted to be.
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Learning to pivot
So the season was beginning but I was having other obstacles and I had to learn the art of the pivot
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Trying to figure it out
Going through the beginning trials and tribulations of the illness and still trying to juggle all the regular aspects of life going into being 17
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Self definition
I was taking care of my athletics and academics but my mind was still in a bad place
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Change in mentality, off-season
I began to realize that my focus needed to change with my returning home, there was no time for me to see things the way I want dead, it was Time for a change
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Trying to be a leader
On top in one aspect but we still hadn’t accomplished much of anything in comparison to the upcoming competition, but how do I tell a team at the Epitone of their success that
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Testing manhood on the field
Making history with conference championships but still being unaware for what was ahead in the playoffs and not being sure on whether I failed my teammates by not saying anything
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Do I deserve this
Like many people the thought of me deserving the illness went through my head regardless of how rational or irrational that might’ve been
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Switching gears
The level of focus really had to turn up with my hiding the illness
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The first moment
What first one through my head was what would I do without sports even though sports isn’t all I was in any way shape or form but it gave me something to feel a part of
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Trying not To let you see me sweat
I was trying to hide it all thinking that I was doing someone a favor
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Initial thoughts
Processing the illness while no one knowing
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First feelings
The early thoughts and beginning emotions of the multiple sclerosis before anyone was made aware, even my own family members
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