Watching Our Egos: The Podcast

This week Jake and Missy dive into a topic a lot of people don’t want to admit they frequently experience: Jealousy. Is jealousy about your partner- or about how you see yourself? When are we being insecure rather than intuitive about our partners? Jake and Missy also discuss how social media can badly inflate people’s jealousy. Open relationships vs monogamous relationships are once again discussed.

Jake and Missy dive into what control means to them. Missy shares what it was like to lose her phone in Bali. Jake shares how control in his family of origin drove him insane. Is control an illusion? Are we ever truly in control? How does control develop and show up in our daily lives? How do unpredictable life events change your perception of control? Listen to find out.

Communication is the thread that runs through everything: love, work, family, and the quiet stories we tell ourselves when we do not know how to say what we mean. We start with a simple question that gets surprisingly big fast: when someone says they’re “struggling with life,” how much of that is really a communication problem including the inability to express needs, name emotions, or stay present during conflict? From slouched posture to zoning out, we look at the signals our bodies send when our voices cannot. We unpack how family systems, especially alcoholic or chaotic environments, can teach us to retreat into our heads as a coping mechanism. That matters in adult romantic relationships because the same pattern shows up as freezing mid-conversation, misreading tone, or assuming the worst. We share a funny but painfully relatable miscommunication story about boiling eggs twice, then pivot into deeper territory: pre-verbal emotion, nervous system activation, and a practical strategy for moments when you “can’t find the words” by describing sensations in your body first. From there we go straight at abandonment fear, ego defence, and why people sometimes burn bridges even when they crave connection. The most grounding takeaway is the commitment to never self-abandon, because when you stay aligned with your values, other people’s reactions become survivable. We also talk couples therapy as proactive skill-building, “receiving the communication” without reacting, and how workplace communication and social media make all of this harder. If you want better communication skills, stronger boundaries, and healthier relationships, hit play, then subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review with the one idea you’re taking with you.

Jake dives right into a vulnerable current event in his life. The complexities of parenting as it relates to taking care of yourself, the right to privacy, and doing what's best for your kids is discussed. Missy shares stories from her past and Jake comments on what his future relationship with alcohol might look like.

Missy dives into what the concept of permission really means in an alcoholic family system. Jake recounts a very vulnerable conversation with his dad. Both continue their conversation about today’s political and cultural climate.

Jake and Missy dive into the reality of conspiracy theories: are they valid or are they crazy? Social media, big news corporations, and various other entities that we rely on for information are discussed. Jake explores the possibility of living outside the US in the future.

This week, Jake and Missy dive into whether tracking your partners location is a healthy thing to do. They expand into why they believe monogamy is still what works best for each of them. Missy goes down a large rabbit hole about politics after Jake opens up about his recent questioning of capitalism.

Jake explores a tough question: do we actually resent our parents, or just the beliefs they taught us? He also reflects on the early days of discovering his sexuality and the internal struggles that came with it. Plus, a look at the growing political claim that education is really “indoctrination.”

Special Guest Lelia B joins to reflect on a weekend of healing! Various other topics discussed including healing from SA/rape trauma.

Audio is better this week. Jake discusses his experience with marketing the podcast on TikTok over the last 7 weeks. Missy and Jake talk about plant medicine. Missy does a deep dive into the true privilege of being an American.

Jake and Missy ditch the effort to go in with a topic idea and go with the most natural form of conversation. Perfectionism, racing thoughts, “chasing the carrot”, and the concept of death are just some of the big picture topics discussed.

Jake and Missy discuss organized religion, spirituality, and how they came to believe what they believe. Jake discuses why he’s an atheist. The importance of Manifestation and the belief that everything happens for a reason is also addressed. Jake and Missy also relate it back to our egos and talk about opening our minds to political opinions we don’t agree with.

Audio is different this week! Microphones are working and editing is limited- so if we say ummm and like a lot please forgive us! Missy and Jake dive into the Patriarchy of the United States. The male loneliness epidemic, social media targeting young men, boys not being allowed to cry and various other topics are discussed. How the patriarchy has created a fragile male ego is discussed and advice is offered for 21st century men going forward in their romantic relationships.

Jake does a deep dive into his past experiences with guys, sharing what he’s learned and how he’s grown from them. He also revisits the darkest moment of his life, reflecting on what drove him to not want to be here anymore. Advice is given to previous generations who have had kids.