Whiskey And Whiskers

Shots let's go.

Shower beer vs. Shitter Cig? Robot Ring Bears are fighting Vampire ninjas and Warewolf Samurais.

Mostly flowin' this episode, but big news too. If you take a cruise, don't buy the Waymo package.

If you buy a new muscle-car, it better have goose-fighting technology. Get some tiddies in your algorithm, so news sends nudes.

This one time I got arrested... twice. Sometimes that's just the heart of the cards.

Don't catch yourself with diarrhea on the greyhound after eating bear-mace wings. That's a good way to catch horse-herpes. We're crashing-in and freaking-out for prison-fights.

It's the Holliday Season, we got turkey-tits, pineapple pie, and porno trading cards over on our new website; shootbigloads.com

I'm gonna invent the tariff stimmy check and find Emilia Earhart. The center of the earth is titties.

Dolphin dicks and ostrich nogs. Don't chip the nip, because we're cruisin' for a "HELL YEAH!"

Grab your milk duds and your Chinese candy-corn, we're joining the hairyfoot beatles cult, but still kind of unsure about green tea. Watch out for research monkeys.

Alright you butt-breathers, take your donkey pills and strap-on for a scooter pursuit. We're Scissor-lifting the vape shop on the way to the taco bell marathon.

We can't launch our nicotine apps because of the government shutdown, and they took away all the dinosaur balls. Looks like we're going back to 96' to steal some beer and chillicheese.

Tune-in to chat GDPGTV+ and learn how to buy dynamite from a crack-dealer. 

Alright you milk-mongerers, come up to the porn fort and bring your perineum piercing cuz we're having tacobell shrimp. Nice balls. 

Put on your headphones and tune in to skin-a-max, it's about to get weird.

Guys, this is AFTER we edited out the objectionable shit... Grab your ball-jacuzzi, your bear-filet-mignon, and your brobiotics and get ready for the 31 Atlas aliens.

If you use the stip-club credit card the kids get free cigs. We're using ribs and rope to catch these emotional support alligators. Just checkup on that Crawford Dog.

5 Cigs, 4 Songs, 3 Bowls, 2 Shots, and 1 Shit.

If you like big booty latinas, you need to be drinking your omega-3 nut water. The California plague is coming for us all, so appeal to your local AI to make Whataburger great again.

You beef bitch boys need to quit drinking irradiated energy drinks, and start potting plant pots and slapping light up titties.

Pretty soon your gonna need a subscription to heaven, but at least there's YooHoo. Shave your butt-hairs, and choose your destiny, cuz fortune favors the drunk.

Power-washing through space with Sydnee Sweaney and Tailor Swifft. Me too man. 

Chic fil a may not have pocket nugz but these camel boobs are obtrusive. Titties and anvils are the way to be. Facts

Erotic mosaics in the Uno Casino are causing primate fashion faux pas. We got Bear-sized beavers out here shittn' on gator eggs. 

A former NHL enforcer lets more hands fly than a rapper on the 4th of July. And he's about to throw your ass in the shit water flood if you don't get the octopi on your team. Grab your 6L of legally distinct off-white Goose beverage and dominate the beach.

The date is July 4th 2053. Zombies have Rhino pills and party with Diddy. The pubes have taken over all of the urinals, but don't worry, we are pissing them away at the Costco bathroom. If you still have all of your fingers, grab a cup of coffee and take a shit at the bank. Not your bank though. Fuck that.

Trump is jacking on Iran, but Kim jong un's golf game is no-cap. Liver king should be investing in DNA, but at what mile marker?

Hey Chat GPT, can you get me all the fights for free, and also door dash me whiskey? Big Foot pizza orders are overloading the AI mainframe. Labubu

Life is short, but dicks are long if you have a big enough kite. When you go to the beach don't catch oral herpes from beer-pong. Especially when you can go fishing in-lieu of rioting. Fuck California.

700 AI MFKRs are paying to pretend to work. Brush, but don''t rinse.

We're holding it in; we're blasting off. Dicks out for Harambe! 

Put away the bluetooth baby-oil, and grab the pre-workout and Icy-Hot, cuz we're breaking the mushroom-simulation and canceling the single-tax. Drink your pussy energy drink, pussy.

Before injecting Butterfly DNA, Check your cybertruck for chechnyian warlords, and opt for the scrotum switch when getting your balls lowered.

When we're fighting gorillas, hopefully we draw the nerd-gorilla. Drink your Gator Smoothies with extra catfood, and you too can beat off in Seattle.

Glizzys subtracting, butt-crack crackin, snot-snake slappin, but the butt-hair slack'n.

Alcoholic slushies on sale for the death-star concert. Robot waitresses are blasting off and slinging sticky on all the fyre festival. I got E.Coli from butthole corn-chips.

Strap on your dragon ballz and unbuckle your seatbelt, cuz when the zombie apocalypse comes, we're taking this truck off Niagra falls. Can I get some extra sour cream please?

The Truck-Nut Episode.

We used to go to porn forts, but now we go to naked boobs.com. alright but check it out, you can order weed with your edible arrangement, and they make socks for all kinds of cocks  #meneither

Big redheads are snortin' sugar off lady liberty's lady lumps. Switch to PE and you'll be flying your Tesla to Ares in no time. 

power rangers are narcs, but when you're out there slappin deities make sure you have a shovel in case there's alligators. 

Boxer briefs are the way to be. When the Tupperware avalanche leads to a laundry strike, you better hope hangin with W doesn't get you microwaved from space. 

Chicken puppies be marrying people. Literally nothing important. But that Zelensky's a bitch.

There's nothing like AppleHop after banging a thousand dudes, but you might get pregnant. Better than being bald in mozambique. Feed your kids Ozempic so they too can unalive home invaders.

Grab your bag of taco bell and sit down for an episode of Alaskan Bush People on XVideos. Make sure to wear your black socks with your dress Crocs. So you can rent a horse and F*ck sink sluts.

White people can use Japanese toilets and hack sex-toys, but they shouldn't mess with peyote. 

We're starting the drunk racing league. There's gonna be a bunch of old alcoholics with prostate issues, and racing chiks with c-section scars. you're gonna have a time.

We're slingin semi-s in the sasquatch sanctuary city, and crushing cold chicken nugs in the costo casa. Just don't forget to turn off the livestream. You don't wanna wake up to a cali-fire from exploding Stanleys.

During dry january, don't get scammed by Keanu on the dark-web. Just trade your playstations for guns and we'll ride dirtbikes. 

Water-boarding is as addictive as Affrin. We're using cell-phone jammers to survive the apocalypse at your mom's house. Caffeine is bad, so drink a bang and enjoy the halftime show.