PODCAST · health
Who Am I Really?
by Damon L. Davis
Adoptees telling their stories of life in adoption, the search for their birth family, and how their reunion attempt turned out. Stories that make you laugh, cry, or simply say "wow".This podcast has two purposes: 1) To help you explore your own feelings about your adoption, accept your desire to try to understand your own personal history, and decide for yourself whether a search for reunification with your biological relatives is right for you. It will help you understand how others have dealt with issues related to protecting the feelings of their adopted families who may be supportive o
Episodes
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One Foot In Front Of The Other
I planned to bring the show back this week, but the end of 2019 and beginning of 2020 have been rough. When you listen to this one, you'll understand why...
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014 – I Would Not Have Made It Without My Faith
Sara was the baby in her family of four biological half brothers to one another, and one other brother who was also adopted like her just like her. When she hit puberty, a naturally more emotional time in our lives, she lost her grandmother, someone who never made her feel like an adoptee. She...
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008 – She Knew She Had To Do This For Me
Cindy had one sister growing up in a mormon family in Las Vegas. But the two adoptees looked very different: Cindy’s blue eyes and blond hair were in stark contrast with her sister’s olive skin and brown hair. She was a very sick child battling illness throughout her life. She never had a burning...
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055 – I’ve Found My Answers And Fulfillment Helping Other People
Katelyn followed her older adopted sister into rebellion against their adopted mother’s rule. Years later her husband suggested they do DNA tests when she got pregnant. Seeing relationships online she hadn’t considered before, she searched for her birth parents, uncovering family secrets and...
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059 – I’m Heather 1
Vonni learned from the neighbor’s child that she was adopted, but she was too young to know what it really meant. In her teen years, the yearning to understand her adoption led her on a journey an hour away to the adoption agency for her non-identifying information. It contained a horrible…
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062 – One Month Of Bonding Helped Me With A Lifetime In Adoption
Tim was adopted into a Lutheran family and his curiosity about his roots started when he was very young. When he met his biological mother, she portrayed her husband as Tim’s father, but the truth came out when her daughters suggested a different version of the truth. It wasn’t until Tim’s early...
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039 – I’m An Adult, But They’re Acting Like Children
Mitch’s parents adopted his older brother, then him. Then they got a surprise addition to the family. They had a great life outside of Chicago, but Mitch did feel somewhat sidelined by the attention paid to his youngest sibling. He learned as a teen that not everyone in his family was supportive…
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027 – I Got A Picture Of My Mother’s Sadness Though Other People
As a kid, Rebecca was considered quirky. Unbeknownst to her, that quirkiness was an after effect of fetal alcohol syndrome. She tells the story of learning her birth mother’s lonely and troubled past, and the closure she finally got after she learned of her mother’s death.
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002 – When the Law is in the Way, Try DNA
Laura became a dear friend when we quickly bonded over being adoptees while working together. Laura had been searching for her family of origin for years, before the age of the internet, and the promise of consumer DNA testing linking long lost relatives. In this episode Laura reveals her…
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109 – You Can’t Change The Past
Dan has barely told anyone the his whole story until this episode. He shared that he was in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) as an infant. Then his son\'s rare medical condition and his wife’s ability to share her heredity while he could not was a catalyst for his search. Dan is thankful…
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108 – On The Outside Is Where I’ve Always Been
Pam, from Emeryville, CA, told me her desire to search started when she was a kid, but it was Oregon’s laws that changed everything for her search. When she met her birthmother she encountered a woman who couldn’t relay the details of her past, leaving Pam with only her paternal side of the…
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107- From A Place Of Love
David from Columbus, Ohio said he was practically at the front door of reunion, but drove away. Years later he finally found some siblings who looked almost exactly like him, and others who’s genetic connection was undeniable. David admitted he’s not an emotional guy, but the rollercoaster of his...
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106 – Beautiful Truth
For Shelby, growing up as a Korean adoptee left her feeling “othered” as she didn’t quite fit into her community. The Korean school her parents tried to raise her in wouldn’t accept her either. She was forced to live in between her culture and what Americans would or would not let her be. On a...
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105 – I Call Her Incubator
My guest asked that I maintain her anonymity, so I’ll refer to her as Nina. She shared her story growing up with dedicated parents who embraced her challenges and gave her the foundational support she needed. Her birth father found her through a reunification registry and while he has his own...
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104 – You’re Obviously One Of Us
Karen is from Stratford, Ontario, Canada. She shares her story of growing up a woman of color who stood out in her family and community. Locating her birth mother she found little connection and a bit of tension, but ultimately she wants to keep the relationship going. That’s partially because…
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103 – Fixing The Fates
Diane called me from St. Petersburg, Florida, but her’s is a story that originated in Germany. Diane tells the story of her parents wanting to form a family with her, but her grandmother frequently talking about her adoption such that no one could ever move on. On a trip back to Germany, Diane...
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102 – It’s Always Maybe
Breanna learned that she was fostered then adopted but for financial gain and she described her home as a hostile environment. Her adopted mother was abusive, and Breanna ultimately ran away from home to the military. But before bootcamp she contacted her birth mother, and learned the hard truth...
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101 – This Is About Everybody
In Debby’s home adoption was an open topic because she was fostered by her grandparents and adopted by their daughter. Unfortunately, she wasn’t welcome as an adoptee by her adopted father and she and her family faced abuse by her stepfather. In reunion Debby found out her birth parents tried to...
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100 – Purely Loving Intentions
Haley Radke, Host/Producer of the Adoptees On podcast is my special guest for this special 100th episode! Haley shared her story of gaining access to her open adoption record in Canada when she was 18 and quickly connecting with her first mother via email. They met soon after, but that rapid...
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099 – We Were Both Missing Something In Our Lives
Joseph is a really outdoorsy guy who lives in Edmonds, Washington, about 30 minutes north of Seattle. He likes mountain biking, trail running, camping and skiing. Joseph grew up in a family of several children, some biological, and one other adoptee you might already know. He told me that he…
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098 – Trained In Trauma
Dr. Julie Lopez lives and works in Washington, D.C. Julie’s early childhood was happy at home, but it was her circle of friends that made her question just what was wrong with being adopted? When she graduated college, her need for information, for professional reasons, made her stumble across an...
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097 – You Gotta Forgive
James called me from right up the road in Laurel, Maryland and we have one degree of separation with one of my adoptive father, Willie’s, friends. In his story you’ll hear his struggle to find himself and an identity as a youth in a family that didn’t look like him. It took him years to find his...
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096 – The Safe Space That’s Don’s Place
Singer Song writer Jenni Alpert, commonly referred to by her birth name, Cami had a wonderful life supported by her adoptive parents as she pursued the performing arts. After her adoptive father passed away, she learned that her biological mother had too. Her maternal connections went well over...
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095 – I Tested Her To See If She’d Give Up
Laura called me via Skype, would you believe, from Falkirk Scotland. Laura told the story of her childhood knowledge that she might have siblings out in the world, and her quest to meet them. When she met her biological mother things started slowly as Laura tested the woman to make sure she…
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094 – Why Would You Spend This Much Time Searching?
Barry always knew he was adopted, but before he ever launched a search, he was found by his older sister. He tells the story of meeting her, and subsequently meeting his birth mother, both of whom welcomed him into their hearts. Hearing stories about why he was placed for adoption, Barry learned...
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046 – I Am Adopted, It Is Who I Am
Jennifer is a reunited adoptee from Pittsburgh. She’s a petite, white blonde of European descent whose adoptive parents are a Spanish man and a Mexican woman. Through her search, she found both of her natural parents are deceased, and she had half brothers on both sides, both named Tom.…
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054 – I Just Want To Sit And Be At Peace
After 52 years in adoption, Mary never had a desire to locate her birth family. Her feeling was they had given her up, so she didn’t really want to share how well she turned out. Still, Mary obtained her non-identifying information in 1999, to satisfy medical history curiosity. On Christmas eve...
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018 – What I Gained Through Reunion Is Context
Rebecca always knew she was adopted, but she also recognized that she didn’t quite fit with her adopted family. While she loved them a lot, she noticed physical and personality differences between them. She was taller with a different skin tone than them. She’s an extrovert raised by introverts…
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025 – I Feel So Lucky, I Got Way More Than I Bargained For
With extra time on her hands, Jennifer used a Search Angel to locate her biological relatives. She connected with her maternal Aunt over Facebook Messenger, simultaneously emailing her birth father using his contact info from LinkedIn. Hoping for a connection to her biological mother, the…
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015 – We Wish We Could Have Grown Up Together
David tried to find his birth mother in the early 90’s in California. He received non-identifying information back then, but it wasn’t much to act on at the time. Later, in 2015, motivated by his wife and his “lifetime sister”, he embarked on an intense collaboration with his adoption search…
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009 – What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger
Mary is 78, but she still has stinging memories of her mother leaving her in another woman’s guardianship. The era was the Great Depression but her mother wanted to go out and have fun without the responsibility of raising In guardianship she was sexually abused, then her guardian blamed her for...
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022 – I’m Still On This Journey, Using My Experience to Help Others
Marni grew up in Madison, WI in a transracial family that lived a predominantly white community. Everywhere they went, they were stared at for the heterogeneity they brought to the community. The attention their family received was a constant reminder of their own racial diversity, but Marni’s...
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028 – Working Out The Puzzle Pieces Helped Me Feel Whole
Elise has always been into genealogy and loved looking at family photos & records when she was a child. As a child of adoption, she wondered where her family of origin was? Reunion has had its ups and downs for Elise. The experience with her birth father’s family has been great over the last 20...
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063 – I’m Really Glad You Came, But It’s Gonna Be A While
Brenda was born in California, grew up on the east coast and lives in Texas. She’s the child of a military family that has lived all over. When a school project required her to ask her adoptive mother about her family tree at eight years old, she was shown her non-identifying information for the...
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011 – From Childhood Rebellion to Thankful Reunion
When Sean was a kid, he found out he was adopted. That news created some conflict in him and challenged his identity. He began to rebel against his adopted parents, but some sage wisdom from his grandmother quickly set him straight. Sean returned to loving and appreciating the family he was a…
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023 – I’ve Found My Joi
Growing up Joi tried to convince herself that being adopted didn’t bother her because she had such a great family. But in reality, great parents did not erase the fact that she didn’t know her birth parents. She laments that never saw anyone who looked like her, and of course, she could never...
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093 – Who Am I Really? An Adoptee Memoir, A Preview
You probably know by now that I’ve written book to share my story, just like so many of our crib mates who have documented their own stories. It’s called Who Am I Really, An Adoptee Memoir. In this episode I introduce my own story, and recap lessons learned from the Who Am I Really podcast.
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092 – Paternally Unrelated
Cindy knew she was adopted, but she believed the men in her life where of biological relation – she thought she was adopted within the family. She lived decades with what she calls a lie. DNA testing revealed that her biological father was someone else entirely, and her search for her birthmother...
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091 – I’m In The Middle Of Two Stories
Ashley had one of those moments where talking to her biological sister felt so familiar it was like texting and and responding to herself. But her birth mother’s pain and uneasiness over Ashley’s desire to learn anything about her birth father was too much for the woman, and their relationship...
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090 – It’s Not Your Fault, I Made It Through
Lori was adopted after her biological mother lived with her adoptive parents, desperately trying to escape the tyranny of her abusive husband. The abuse her birth mother suffered would be a recurring theme in her own life when her mother’s drinking got worse. Lorie tells the story of growing up...
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089 – I’m Reconciling This Feeling of Hurt
Steve, from London, Ontario, Canada shares his story of being adopted after his mother lost a child. Steve and his mother never connected, in fact, she stifled his social development and seemed to be holding him back because he didn’t look like their family, and didn’t fit in. As a teen, Steve…
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088 – Being Biracial Never Occurred to Me
In Kenneth’s family all of siblings were adoptees, each fostered in their parents home before their adoption were made final. That scenario worked out great for Kenneth, but not so much so for his oldest sister who never bonded with their mother. Seeking reunion, Kenneth carefully approached his...
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087 – A Journey To Find Out Where I Came From
When he was a kid, Bill saw clues here and there that he was adopted, but no one ever actually said it. It wasn’t until he called an uncle he’d never met before that the truth was revealed, turning Bill’s world upside down. Reunion with his birth mother was an emotional event with a woman who was…
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086 – Second Time
As an interracial adoptee and musical artist, Ferera grew up feeling different from her adopted family. When her adoption was tearfully confirmed by her Mom, it created doubt within her about whether it was okay to be different? Ferera met her birth mother, and the woman’s twin sister, so their...
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085 – A Bad Truth Is Better Than A Good Lie
After the adoptive father she loved so much died, Alison learned her birth father, Tim, was looking for her and she took it as a good sign of things to come. Sadly she found herself disappointed in him, and later in her birth mother, Jean, whom he contacted without telling her. Alison had no idea...
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084 – There’s A Certain Sense of Completeness
Neal’s search didn’t take off until he was 66 years old! He got a DNA kit for his birthday and within months he was in touch with his paternal family. Ohio’s open original birth certificate help him learn his birth mother’s name, but he couldn’t find a single maternal connection during his…
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083 – An Unbelievable Emotional Roller Coaster For Me
Before becoming an adoptee advocate Rich was searching for his own identity. As a child, his older adopted sister vengefully told him their mom wasn’t his real mother. It made him wonder who the other woman could be. When he was in college, his adoptive parents gave him an envelope of...
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082 – The Only Thing That Divides Us Is The Mississippi
Ann has an array of experiences from being kidnapped briefly from her adopted family to learning she celebrated the wrong birth date for 22 years. She said she was raised not to question God’s plan in relation to her adoption — so she did so quietly. When she met her biological mother things...
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081 – I’ve Got The World By The Tail
Sandee shared the story of her life with an adopted brother who was coddled by their mother, so much so, that it reinforced her own natural position as a Daddy’s girl. That favoritism forced Sandee’s independence from her mother, but also created a bit of a rift between them. Locating her birth...
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080 – It’s Not About How You Got Here
Rachel is a Hispanic woman of Chilean descent, raised in a Jewish family. She shared her feelings of otherness trying to connect with other Spanish speaking children with her limited proficiency. Rachel describes her father’s blindness to her heritage, and her unbelievable luck to have strangers...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Adoptees telling their stories of life in adoption, the search for their birth family, and how their reunion attempt turned out. Stories that make you laugh, cry, or simply say "wow".This podcast has two purposes: 1) To help you explore your own feelings about your adoption, accept your desire to try to understand your own personal history, and decide for yourself whether a search for reunification with your biological relatives is right for you. It will help you understand how others have dealt with issues related to protecting the feelings of their adopted families who may be supportive o
HOSTED BY
Damon L. Davis
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Who Am I Really? have?
Who Am I Really? currently has 110 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Who Am I Really? about?
Adoptees telling their stories of life in adoption, the search for their birth family, and how their reunion attempt turned out. Stories that make you laugh, cry, or simply say "wow".This podcast has two purposes: 1) To help you explore your own feelings about your adoption, accept your desire to...
How often does Who Am I Really? release new episodes?
Who Am I Really? publishes regularly with 110 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to Who Am I Really??
You can listen to Who Am I Really? on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Who Am I Really??
Who Am I Really? is created and hosted by Damon L. Davis.
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