Episodes
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FINALE - BIP (2025)
Hey remember Bachelor in Paradise? That thing that had it's finale like 2 weeks ago? Well we finally got our shit together to post our recap of the dramatic conclusion to the season and here it is for your listening pleasure! Ultimately an oddly satisfying end to an odd season. We are now ready…
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Episodes 8 and 9 - Bachelor in Paradise (2025)
Another double episode! A lot in happening in our lives and on our screens! This week we try to put ourselves in the contestants shoes and think about how we would handle these challenges. The answer seems to be, not any better than those suckers. Only one episode left after this one, buckle up...
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Episode 7 - Bachelor in Paradise (2025)
Okay we probably should have edited this one more, but ultimately lacked the drive and motivation and also wanted to get it published so you guys can finally listen to it! This episode the producer's games continue, our complaints continue, Kim being unbearable to watch but also impossible not to...
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Episode 6 - Bachelor in Paradise (2025)
OOPS THE FILE WE UPLOADED BEFORE WAS BAD. Genuinely not quite sure how that happened.... as you all know we are typically a well oiled machine around here. Anyways, here's take 2! Okay well we don't have Taylor Swift announcing a new album on our podcast, but we think you should listen anyways.…
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Episodes 4 & 5 - Bachelor in Paradise (2025)
We took so long to find a time to record that another episode rolled around. Therefore we decided to combine our recaps of the two so that you all would get your content as soon as possible. The only problem with doing this is sometimes Grace forgets about what has already happened vs what still...
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Episodes 2 & 3 - Bachelor in Paradise (2025)
We deserve whatever award they give to podcasters for keeping this week's episode under 2 hours. We truly did not think we had it in us, there was SO MUCH to cover!! This season is not disappointing, we'll say that much. Consider us hooked. Can't wait to see where the rest of the season takes us,...
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Episode 1 - Bachelor in Paradise (2025)
We're baaaaaaack and brief as ever! We basically had nothing to say about how excited we are that paradise is back and all the crazy changes and who the cast is. Honestly we didn't really care and had no opinions it's pretty whatever to us. PSYCH. WE HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS AND WANT TO TELL YOU ALL...
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FINALE!!! THE BACHELOR!!! GRANT!!!
So is it just us or was the most shocking part of this episode seeing Clayton on our screens again? Well folks, it is time to wrap up another season of this great show we call The Bachelor. It always seems to just fly by. Now Grant and Julianna are off to make their way in the world together and...
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Fantasy Suites - The Bachelor (Grant)
Anders isn't part of this episode and we're as disappointed as you are about it. We hope you enjoy the episode anyway, at least as best you can given the circumstances. We yet again have questions for production this episode, such as, why did you do that? Will you hire us? And what did Zoe ever…
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Women Tell All - The Bachelor (Grant)
Well this is what we get for being excited for Women Tell All. Disappointment. Liv and Grace were not always on the same side this episode because they were on different team. Liv's team = reasonable in terms of right and wrong Grace's team = what makes a good storyline for TV Unfortunately...
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Hometowns - The Bachelor (Grant)
We are both very tired and fear we have to admit it shows in this episode. The number of times we had to trail off because the simple word we were looking for eluded us... was a lot.... This week the Mormons were SO Mormon and the Italians were SO Italian. Hometowns marks the beginning of the end...
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Week 5 - The Bachelor (Grant)
On this week's episode, Siri cannot stop making appearances, and we are forced to confront that we do not actually know what the word "Celtic" refers to. Apologies for being uncultured swine. Grant continues to baffle and bamboozle us as he carries on down the road towards hometowns.
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Week 4 - The Bachelor (Grant)
We are absolutely cruising through this season! Did you know there's only one episode left before hometowns?? WTF?? This episode we truly never knew what was coming next. There is a new playbook in use and someone forgot to loop us in. The world is entirely falling apart and maybe we shouldn't be...
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Week 3 - The Bachelor (Grant)
This week we are excited to talk about Grant's burgeoning music career and perhaps a little about the episode as well. Just a warning, our video call was on a slight delay so there are some pauses in the conversation while we wait for the audio to catch up. We were hoping we played it off…
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Week 2 - The Bachelor (Grant)
Well, it's that time of year again. The time of year when Grace is working on a play and therefore our recording schedule gets completely out of whack. Also when her watching schedule gets completely out of whack. We are nevertheless going to try our darnedest to get episodes out as quickly as we...
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Night 1 - The Bachelor (Grant)
Limos and lamas and violent t shirt canons, oh my! Grant's season start off strong with many, many smooches and some fun entrances. Grant is already proving to kind of be the strong, silent type, so it'll be up to this cast of women to stir things up. We have no doubt they are up to the task. We...
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The question game with Grant's cast (ft. Mason Lok!!)
Okay we are SO back this time!! We biffed it on recapping the Golden Bachelor and we will be the first to admit it, but we can and will do better! That resolution starts with our favorite pre-season tradition, the question game with Mason Lok! As usual, he knows nothing about the show, we know…
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The Golden Bachelorette (weeks 1-3)
Okay we are finally back, and are sorry it took us so long! We decided to adopt the same recording schedule for The Golden Bachelorette as we did for The Golden Bachelor last year, without realizing they increased the episode length (those bastards!!). Therefore you are all getting a nearly 2…
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FINALE - THE BACHELORETTE (JENN) (ONE OF THE CRAZIEST THINGS WE'VE EVER SEEN)
Holy shit you guys, where to even start. Neither of us saw this one coming, and suffice to say our shit was rocked. Also we recorded this on Friday (9/6) so this recap doesn't even include some of the shit that is still storming (apologies there, but how were we to know)??? The injustice that…
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Fantasy Suites (and a little MTA) - The Bachelorette (Jenn)
Hi team, so sorry this is late!! Grace ran into some very minor computer issues, but all is well now. Please enjoy this slightly rushed recap of Fantasy Suites and the main highlights of Men Tell All. We did suffer through it this time around, and you know we HATE to do that! We wish Jenn's top 3...
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The Bachelorette - Hometowns (Jenn)
Guys Jenn could have chemistry with a rock (aka Marcus). She had us giggling and kicking our feet all episode! If only there was a guy who actually wanted to be there besides maybe Devin, then everything would be perfect! In this recap Grace would like to fight Jeremy's family and Liv would like…
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Jenn is an amazing bachelorette (week 1-6)
We're baaaaack bitches! Did you miss us? Cause we missed you. We are so sorry to leave you hanging on what has been a truly amazing season thus far. Please forgive us, it can be your wedding present to Liv. Since the last time we talked she became a wife??? What???? We are praying that will be…
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FINALE!!!!!! - THE BACHELOR!!!! (JOEY!!!!!)
Okay, here we are, only a week after we recorded the episode. Once we came down from the high that was this finale, it was hard to find the motivation to edit this episode. Apologies, but the wait is now over! Please tune in to hear us recap one of the best finales in the history of this…
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Women Tell All (and end of Fantasy Suites) - The Bachelor (Joey)
We are famous WTA (and MTA) haters!!! And we LOVED this episode!!! Maria is a queen! These ladies are smart and accomplished! Lauren is an immediate icon! Everyone got mad at Lea for saying "gaslit" and it was so validating! And now we have 2 major questions. 1). What is the dramatic thing that...
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Fantasy Suites - The Bachelor (Joey) (Anders' Version)
Guys we may have actually Mandela Effected ourselves. Both Liv and Grace have a distinct memory of a shot of Joey and Rachel making out in front of a waterfall being present in trailers for this season. However, when we went back, we cannot seem to find it??? We may be losing it, but thankfully…
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Hometowns - The Bachelor (Joey)
In this week's episode Liv and Grace continue to express uneducated medical opinions, and you as the audience will learn that despite the fact that that Grace #believesscience she cannot bring herself to believe in supplements or anemia. On the subject of Joey, hometowns was a fun episode! Crazy...
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Week 7 -The Bachelor (Joey)
Okay we're SORRY this is late. We actually recorded it at a very punctual time, but Grace was feeling unmotivated and did not get around to editing it until now. And if we're being honest she didn't give it her all. Hopefully she didn't miss any juicy secrets she was supposed to cut out....…
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Week 6 - The Bachelor (Joey)
A succinct and efficient weekly recap for you all! Not sure what sped us along so quickly this week, it may have been the threat of danger coming from the yellowjacket in Grace's room. We remain delighted with this season, and thoroughly stumped as to who will be making it to hometowns! We cannot...
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Weeks 4 & 5 - The Bachelor (Joey)
Who has the time to dedicate themselves thoroughly to 4 hours of TV in one week??? Okay apparently the answer is us, but it was a challenge (and before you feel targeted remember that when we watch the bachelor it is WORK not PLEASURE). And while we can apparently dedicate ourselves to 4 hours of...
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Week 3 - The Bachelor (Joey)
We need to start off this week with a very somber and serious apology to my good friend Autumn who we so egregiously misrepresented in the last episode. She prepared a statement for us to read on her behalf so tune in for that. Anyways we loved this episode! We love Joey! We love Jenn! We love...
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Week 2 - The Bachelor (Joey)
Please excuse us, we just need to slip into something more comfortable... Excellent. Now that we are both looking sexy and hot we can finally begin recording! Sorry for the delay in this episode, schedules are hectic and the grammys are on! This week we were excited to see Rachel emerge as a…
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Week 1 - The Bachelor (Joey)
Guys, we love Joey. We love him. It's no surprise that this episode boosted ratings for the first time in years because we are CHARMED. Charmed by him, charmed by Daisy, absolutely blown away by Lea, weirded out by Lauren, etc. This is already shaping up to be an amazing season of the bachelor…
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Joey's Cast Bios Question Game (ft. Mason Lok!)
It's the start of a new season and you know what that means! It's time for a special pre season episode with everyone's favorite non-bachelor watcher, Mason Lok! We answer such burning questions as, who is the meanest to waiters? Who definitely drives a Prius? And much, much more! (You know Liv...
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FINALE!!! - BIP (2023)
Oh boy. Not going to lie to you guys, this episode has a weird energy. Mostly we are bummed at such a lame an unsatisfying end to what used to be the best part part of the franchise. Then Grace gets weirdly worked up and angry in the middle kind of about nothing? Then we transition to whining…
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Special Golden Bachelor episode!! (WTA, Fantasy Suites, and FINALEEEEEEE)
Two episodes in two days?? We spoil you! Just kidding. We just don't have our shit together. Please enjoy our thoughts on the final 3 episodes of this inaugural season of the Golden Bachelor. It seems like there is simply no way they won't be continuing this series, and we can't wait to keep...
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Week 9 - BIP (2023)
Okay so it took us a while to record this. And then it took Grace even longer to edit and publish it. What do you want from us??? We are not machines! Sleep is an activity now! Anyways, we think all episode of the bachelor should actually just be one hour because this was a tasty little treat…
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Week 8 - BIP (2023)
You guys, we were feeling a little narcissistic this episode so why not lean in for the episode description and tell you that we feel this was one of our best recaps of the season. We were on fire! Or maybe just delirious from hunger! Only you can be the judge! Please enjoy and try not to judge…
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Week 7 - BIP (2023)
We're not going to lie to you guys. We're not doing well. Daylight Savings Time really hit us right in the seasonal depression and it shows. If you listen to this episode and you're like "dang this kind of sounds like a cry for help," that's because it is a little bit OKAY?? Also sorry for the...
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Special Golden Bachelor episode!!! (weeks 4, 5 and Hometowns!!!)
This show is giving us everything, pickleball, never have I ever, Joey, and MORE!!! While we did thoroughly enjoy practically every second of these episodes, we did have to watch Gerry unfortunately fall into every Bachelor's trap. The multiple "I'm in love with you's." Oops!! While this is still...
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Week 6 - BIP (2023)
Has a recap podcast episode literally e v e r been this punctual??? (don't answer that). A good but mostly uneventful episode (Grace only had 2.5 pages of notes), but it set us up with great success for shit to hopefully hit the fan this coming week. We are dying for a rose ceremony over here…
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Week 5 - BIP (2023)
We have several questions for the Bachelor in Paradise producers this week: What did Sean do to piss you off so badly? What really happened to the cake? How on earth is Peter still here? Why is no one allowed to have a happy birthday? If anyone has any insight, please write in. Thank you so much.
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Week 4 - BIP (2023)
You know what? It's kind of almost a good thing that we take almost a full week to record and release our recap episodes, because now you can listen to our recap this afternoon before watching this weeks episode and remember everything from last week! So essentially what we are doing is actually...
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Special Episode!! The Golden Bachelor part 1!!!!
Welcome to a special episode where we talk about the first 3 episodes of the Golden Bachelor!! If you are not interested in hearing us gush for an hour about how good it is, you should probably take your listening ears elsewhere. However, if you want to hear about one of the best things airing on...
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Week 3 - BIP (2023)
Eat lots of fiber and drink water kids! That's what Nurse Mason has to say on this very educational episode about constipation. We did talk about other things as well, but frankly much more of the discussion was about constipation that we thought. Thanks for following along as we continue to…
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Week 2 - BIP (2023)
Look if there's one thing I'm not gonna do (this is Grace speaking), it's edit and post these episodes in a timely manner. I'M SORRY OKAY. I know it's very delayed but it is technically being released before the next week's episode airs (on the west coast). Please enjoy our recap of week 2, and...
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Week 1 - BIP (2023)
Bachelor in Paradise is back and so are we!!! Overall we started this season off not with a bang, but with more of a... I don't know, something pitiful. It wasn't the most exciting first episode, but Paradise never disappoints, and if the previews are anything to go off of, we are in for a killer...
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CHARITY'S FINALE!!!! - The Bachelorette
We made it to the end of Charity's season!!! We love the way things all wrapped up, but we are sad to see her go. She will go down in history as a phenomenal bachelorette and with any luck she and Dotun will enter the actually married bachelor couple's hall of fame! We love Charity, we love…
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Fantasy Suites with special guest Anders!!! - The Bachelorette (Charity)
It's fantasy suites and you know what that means!!! Anders is back to give us his hottest takes on the final 3 men of this season. We spend probably a solid 50% of the episode on Xavier, another 20% on a very raunchy observation, and the final 30% on whatever else happened this episode. Please...
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Hometowns - The Bachelorette (Charity)
Rarely, if ever, have we seen so many home run hometowns in one episode. With the exception of bummer loser Uncle Joe, the family's this week were delightful, charming, and insanely good at saying all the right things. Consider us in love with all of them (just like Charity). Sorry the audio gets…
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Week 5 - The Bachelorette (Charity)
It's almost hometowns and we're in New Orleans and the drama is at a tasteful simmer. Nothing is boiling over just yet, but you can just tell it's about to. We had two lovely one on one dates this episode that had us blushing and kicking our feet (Joey if you don't ride off into the sunset with...