All Episodes
Cast Iron Brains - A Podcast with Bob and Abe — 313 episodes
Jimmy Carter is Born Again, Again...Again (Cast Iron Balls #72)
The Return of Sports! (Cast Iron Balls #71)
Defining Psychotic Murder Moms Down (CIB #287)
In the Thrall of the Fabulists (CIB #286)
Medically Necessary Elective Podcast Surgery (CIB #285)
A Crisis of Rowdy Roddy Piper (CIB #284)
The Last* Trump Summer (CIB #283)
Woodstock '26 (CIB #282)
America Rules, Actually! (CIB #281)
Fortunately, the Forecast is Clear (CIB #280)
An Aloneness Enhancement Machine (CIB #279)
Abe REDACTED in These Streets (CIB #278)
An Armed-adillo Assassin Takes on President Jesus (CIB #277)
Prayer in the Age of Consent (CIB #276)
What Happens on the Dark Side of the Moon... (CIB #275)
Bike Headlamp Thief Apologists (CIB #274)
I Spent A Week in Northern Europe and All I Got Was A Lot of Complaining About Airlines (CIB #273)
Dubious Solutions (CIB #272)
Make America Great World Police Again (CIB #271)
Really Good at the Really Bad Thing (CIB #270)
White Men Can't Soap (CIB #269)
Le Hibou Superbe LX: Le Lapin Coquin vs L'Enfant Rock (CIB #268)
We Are All Mike D's Cat (CIB #267)
Oops! They Did it Again (CIB #266)
Human as a Second Language (CIB #265)
All of Us Witnesses Found Wanting (CIB #264)
Report: Hoosiers Drink Megatron's Butthole Dry (Cast Iron Balls #69)
That Time Donald Trump Dark-Knighted a President (CIB #263)
Grunter Stockman, Bulldog Hero (Cast Iron Balls #68)
So Long 2025 Too-Long Spectacular! (CIB #262)
Communing with Idiot Space Whales, Again (CIB #261)
Have Some Self-Respect and Self-Possession, and Other Losing Arguments (Cast Iron Balls #67)
Cold Showers, Gingerbread, and Unserious People (CIB #260)
Podcast Hosts Mark 15,000th Spin on News Ride (CIB #259)
Winning Conference Titles Rules, Actually (Cast Iron Balls #66)
Chucklefucks Run Amok (Cast Iron Balls #65)
Trying to Find the Lance Who Did This (Cast Iron Balls #64)
Sharing Our Cast Iron Balls with Visiting Family (Cast Iron Balls #63)
A Sickos Quadbox Kinda Weekend (Cast Iron Balls #62)
"Hi, my name is Steve Sarkisian, and it has been three days since my last ass-kicking." (Cast Iron Balls #61)
Why is the Toyotathon Lady? (Cast Iron Balls #60)
How to Become a Youth Soccer Coach (Cast Iron Balls #59)
Defending All Our Positions, Except the Ones We Don't (Cast Iron Balls #58)
Fall Ball, of Many Varieties, is the Best Ball (Cast Iron Balls #57)
Riding Yoshi (the Horse) to Parlay Glory (Cast Iron Balls #56)
Maybe All this Gambling is Bad, Actually (Cast Iron Balls #55)
Watching 20-Year-Olds Do Dumb Things for Fun (Cast Iron Balls #54)
The Herschel Walker Urinals at Peabody Hall (Cast Iron Balls #53)
Immiserating Our Kids, One Way or Another (CIB #258)
The Universal Signal for Illegal Clapping (Cast Iron Balls #52)
We Don't Care for Auburn or French Fire Perverts (Cast Iron Balls #51)
Can the Hot AI Robits Be a Bit More Beguilingly Sad? (CIB #257)
"Cranky bitches losing just makes me so happy." (Cast Iron Balls #50)
Abe's Arms are Tired (CIB #256)
Great Games and Less than Ideal Results (Cast Iron Balls #49)
Bracing Ourselves to Not Storm the Field (Cast Iron Balls #48)
But Can I Take the Tylenol If I'm Pregnant With Bison Babies? (CIB #255)
Absurdly Wealthy Chucklefucks (Cast Iron Balls #47)
No Exit Strategy (Cast Iron Balls #46)
Trying to Disprove the Thesis (CIB #254)
Humiliation on Hyundai Field (Cast Iron Balls #45)
A Weird Day, But We Yap On (Cast Iron Balls #44)
Our True Birthright is 11 Varieties of Goldfish Crackers, Oreo Mashups (CIB #253)
We're Doing Spitting! (Cast Iron Balls #43)
Less Football Despite More Football, Somehow (Cast Iron Balls #42)
Various Curious Paths to Higher Social Capital (CIB #252)
Sports Takes Fit to be Buried In (CIBalls #41)
Week 1 2025 Preview (TM) (Cast Iron Balls #40)
Assholes Begatting Assholes, Forever (CIB #251)
Cast Iron Balls Returns! (Cast Iron Balls #39)
Putin-Trump Summit Goes All Skibidi (CIB #250)
Wrapping Up the Dog Days by Fixing Everything (CIB #249)
Sydney Sweeney Gets Into Domestic Disputes at Panera Bread (CIB #248)
Private Chefs, Organic Ho Hos, and the 1% Doctrine (CIB #247)
Viscerally Objectionable Content (CIB #246)
What Baseball Pants Can Teach Us About Mass Casualty Floods (CIB #245)
Nothing Patriotic Planned Except Generalized Dismay (CIB #244)
Walking Boots, Disco Balls, and Massive Ordinance Penetrators (CIB #243)
Nothing Else Matters, Just the LOLz (CIB #242)
Desecrated Temples, Desiccated Brains (CIB #241)
America Finally Gets What We Have Long Been Denied (CIB #240)
Doll Decadence and Pencil Profligacy (CIB #239)
100 Days Down, 1000 Years to Go (CIB #238)
The Insatiable Broken-Faced Man (CIB #237)
The Perils of Overcommunication (CIB #236)
"You make me sad." (CIB #235)
We are the Real Voice of America (CIB #234)
We Keep Dumping the Turd Right Back into the Punchbowl (CIB #233)
Fasting on Mecca Time (CIB #232)
No Surprises Publishing (CIB #231)
One Neat Trick to Dismantle the West (CIB #230)
The Infrastructure of Immiseration (CIB #229)
Did the People Demand a King? (CIB #228)
The View from The Floor (CIB #227)
More Like Super Bowl LIX...ASS! (Cast Iron Balls #38)
Sphere and Walking in Las Vegas (CIB #226)
Yankees Fans Know What's In the Box (Cast Iron Balls #37)
American Grotesquerie (CIB #225)
A Natty for anOSU (Cast Iron Balls #36)
A Great Year Already (Cast Iron Balls #35)
Abe, Whimsical Snow Artiste (CIB #224)
Greg McElroy is Never Wrong (Cast Iron Balls #34)
Playoff Football Spectacular! (Cast Iron Balls #33)
Shoveling into 2025 (CIB #223)
A Sliver of What We Got Wrong About 2024 (CIB #222)
Half the Day is Mo[u]rning (Cast Iron Balls #32)
Cast Iron Christmas (CIB #221)
'Twere the Balls Before Christmas (Cast Iron Balls #31)
College Football...Playoffs?! (Cast Iron Balls #30)
The United States of Smarm, on CBS (CIB #220)
Bashar al-Assad, Ed Snowden, and Tal Bachman in Putin's Heisman House (CIB #219)
McConaughey Can't Beat Georgia (Cast Iron Balls #29)
Too Many Clowns (Cast Iron Balls #28)
No Presidential Pardon from the Black Box of Doom (CIB #218)
The Clenched Butthole Contagion (Cast Iron Balls #27)
A Very Ballsy Thanksgiving (Cast Iron Balls #26)
Apparently Everyone Deserves One Roofie Mulligan (CIB #217)
Getting the Suck Out of the Way (Cast Iron Balls #25)
A Scatted Prayer for a Blazin' Blackgoat Thunderbird (Cast Iron Balls #24)
Paul/Tyson defeat Our Dignity, Unanimous, 8 rounds (Cast Iron Balls #23)
Perils of a Cashless Society, 17 y/o Hookers Edition (CIB #216)
The Best Bus Drivers are Highly Interruptible (Cast Iron Balls #22)
About Last Tuesday (CIB #215)
Frauds Exposed Weekend! (Cast Iron Balls #21)
"We're [mostly] not talking about that." (Cast Iron Balls #20)
Election Shmuhlection! (Cast Iron Balls #19)
Here We Go Again, Again (CIB #214)
RELENTLESS LOSERS (Cast Iron Balls #18)
Some Competence, Mostly Buffoonery (CIB #213)
The Best Statues are Placid and Flaccid (Cast Iron Balls #17)
Two Weeks! (CIB #212)
Wrong About Everything But the Main Thing (Cast Iron Balls #16)
All Physicality, Limited Composure (Cast Iron Balls #15)
Skyline Chili vs Gas Station Nachos vs Humanity (CIB #211)
What Dan Lanning Gets Up To Around the Trailer Park (Cast Iron Balls #14)
Miranda Lambert's Cowpoke Fuckhouse (Cast Iron Balls #13)
CoffeeMating Our Way Out of Civilization (CIB #210)
A Diego Pavia-Sized Blind Spot (Cast Iron Balls #12)
We Don't Care for Auburn (Cast Iron Balls #11)
Patiently Awaiting the Real Apocalypses (CIB #209)
The Cope is Strong with This One (Cast Iron Balls #10)
Life is Fleeting, but Sport is Not (Cast Iron Balls #9)
Thriving in the Current Conditions (CIB #208)
Specify the Doors that General Booty Opens (Cast Iron Balls #8)
The Fine People at Little Debbie's Favorite Coach (Cast Iron Balls #7)
Many Paths to the Rainbow Bridge (CIB #207)
"Fade the public, and especially Abe." (Cast Iron Balls #6)
Week 3 is here! And so are two of us! (Cast Iron Balls #5)
THE PEOPLE ON TELEVISION: A Debate Recap (CIB #206)
A New Test for Racism (Really!) (CIB #205)
What the People Demand (Cast Iron Balls #4)
Not Mayo Spon-Con, But Trustworthy Nonetheless (Cast Iron Balls #3)
Rounding Up to One Percent (CIB #204)
The "Shoving it Down Our Throats" Strategy (Cast Iron Balls #2)
A Podcast Shaped Like the Platonic Sportsball (Cast Iron Balls #1)
No Need to Workshop Anything More Offensive (CIB #203)
Thoughts on the Relative Crunkedness of the DNC, and Other Proofs that We Live in a Fallen World (CIB #202)
At the Mercy of the Coin of the Flip (CIB #201)
The Fantastic Voyage Continues, 200 Episodes In (CIB #200)
Greeting the End of the World with a ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (CIB #199)
Not a Sickness. A Fact. (CIB #198)
Experts Say the President's Brains Are Real Bad (CIB #197)
"The Cats Have No Tape On the Aliens" (CIB #196)
Fighting Mountain Bears and Combatting Hillbilly Baserunning (CIB #195)
"I'm not pitching a no-hitter with regret, like you." (CIB #194)
"It's not great, but it's better than that other thing." (CIB #193)
Pretending We're Like the Others (CIB #192)
The Appearances of Various Improprieties (CIB #191)
A Special Set of Skills for the Post-Apocalypse (CIB #190)
Smashing Everything We Love About Humanity Into One Convenient Package (CIB #189)
A Lot of What Goes On In Boarding School (CIB #188)
Sometimes You're Not the Prick, Experts Say (CIB # 187)
The Eclipse Goes 28% Further in Canadian Dollars (CIB #186)
Even More Thoughts on Famous People's Faces (CIB #185)
Bloodbath In Our Hands, Again (CIB #184)
Revisiting "Donald Trump, World's Greatest Sports Fan" (The Narcissist’s Archivist #1)
The Morning Press for Wednesday, March 13, 2024 (TMP #54)
Exactly Where We Are Meant To Be (CIB #183)
The Morning Press for Monday, March 11, 2024 (TMP #53)
Abe vs. Nature v Bob vs. Modernity (CIB #182)
The Morning Press for Monday, March 4, 2024 (TMP# 52)
The Morning Press for Wednesday, February 28, 2024 (TMP #51)
Musical Theater Bathroom Reviews and Other Essential Talk (CIB #181)
The Morning Press for Tuesday, February 27, 2024 (TMP #50)
The Morning Press for Friday, February 23, 2024 (TMP #49)
The Morning Press for Thursday, February 22, 2024 (TMP #48)
True Detective: Night Country Sucked (CIB #180)
The Morning Press for Tuesday, February 20, 2024 (TMP #47)
The Morning Press for Friday, February 16, 2024 (TMP #46)
The Morning Press for Thursday, February 15, 2024 (TMP #45)
Making Noise Only About Things We Fully Understand, As Always
The Morning Press for Tuesday, February 13, 2024
The Morning Press for Monday, February 12, 2024
The Morning Press for Friday, February 9, 2024
The Morning Press for Thursday, February 8, 2024
The Morning Press for Wednesday, February 7, 2024
We're All in the Night Country Now
The Morning Press for Monday, February 5, 2024
The Morning Press for Thursday, February 1, 2024
The Secret of Our Success (Lori. It's always Lori.)
The Morning Press for Tuesday, January 30, 2024
The Morning Press for Monday, January 29, 2024
The Morning Press for Friday, January 26, 2024
Flying Down the Mountain at Top Speed and with No Regard
The Morning Press for Thursday, January 25, 2024
The Morning Press for Wednesday, January 24, 2024
The Morning Press for Tuesday, January 23, 2024
The Morning Press for Monday, January 22, 2024
The Morning Press for Friday, January 19, 2024
The Morning Press for Thursday, January 18, 2024
In the Stoppage Time of Life
The Morning Press for Tuesday, January 16, 2024
The Morning Press for Monday, January 15, 2024
The Morning Press for Friday, January 12, 2024
The Potential for Much Fuckery
The Morning Press for Wednesday, January 10, 2024
The Morning Press for Tuesday, January 9, 2024
The Morning Press for Monday, January 8, 2024
The Morning Press for Friday, January 5, 2024
A New Month
The Morning Press for Thursday, January 4, 2024
The Morning Press for Wednesday, January 3, 2024
The Morning Press for Tuesday, January 2, 2024
Sending Out 2023 While Still Fully Recumbent
The Morning Press for Friday, December 22, 2023
The Morning Press for Thursday, December 21, 2023
The Morning Press for Wednesday, December 20, 2023
Trying to Tush Push Our Way Through to Christmas
The Morning Press for Tuesday, December 19, 2023
The Morning Press for Monday, December 18, 2023
The Morning Press for Friday, December 15, 2023
The Morning Press for Thursday, December 14, 2023
The Morning Press for Wednesday, December 13, 2023
Sometimes a Birthday Soda Turns Into Tough Shit
The Morning Press for Tuesday, December 12, 2023
The Morning Press for Monday, December 11, 2023
The Morning Press for Friday, December 8, 2023
The Morning Press for Thursday, December 7, 2023
The Morning Press for Wednesday, December 6, 2023
And Now, Back to Your Regularly Scheduled Programming
The Morning Press for Tuesday, December 5, 2023
The Morning Press for Monday, December 4, 2023
The Morning Press for Friday, December 1, 2023
The Morning Press for Thursday, November 30, 2023
The Morning Press for Wednesday, November 29, 2023
Prejudiced Against Because We're Podcasters
What Grown-Ups Do
Tankie on a Train, and Other Moral Stains
Sorry for Podcast Rocking
Successful Quagmires, and Other Inevitabilities
"Get me to Palestine with Some Medical Shears and a Bible!"
A Big Planet, with Tumult in Parts
Death in a Braves Hat
The Fellas Go to Parti-Gras
Living OJ Simpson's Best Life
Remembering Where You Were the First Time Someone Asked You If You Remember Where You Were On 9/11
Danse du Petit Tout Étoiles
An Idea Whose Time We Have Eventually Gotten Around To By Default
Familiarity Breeds Tight-Lipped Tolerance
Lil Oppie Wants to do WHAT?!
Portrait of the World in a 19.5:9 Aspect Ratio
"On the Jewish Front..."
The Ascetic in the Punchbowl
I Got Yer Consequentialism Right Here
Depraved Sickos Getting Their Rocks Off
Regarding Buying Stuff
Now We Know
The Sorts of Stories We Would Tell About Ourselves, Were We Not Ourselves
No Sympathy for these Asshats
Just Big Burly Dudes Being Dramatic
Another Podcast, Unfortunately, or Fortunately
Demanding Term Limits for Podcasters
Devastating Moments in Hydration History
A Classic Body Shape for Suspenders
What Your Collections, Music Tastes, and Favorite Podcasts Say About Your Moral Soul
Manhattan DA Makes In-Kind Campaign Contribution to Trump 2024
Where Euphemists Fear to Tread
30 Helen Mirrens Agree, Whatever You're Thinking About Helen Mirren, Just Stop It
Five Hours You'll Never Get Back in Just Over Two Hours
Spielen Sie Die Trumpfkarte Für Den Sieg
A Serious Conversation Always Starts with a Hostile Takeover
No Landmass for Experienced Persons
The Virtue of Ambivalence, and Vice Versa
Trying to Make the Robits More Human, But Not Like That
When Acronyms Attack
No Ordinary Year of the Rabbit
Scams with Dogs, and Other Things
Glory, Glory to Old Georgia! REDUX
Shannnnkkkkkkking In the New Year
The Everlasting Jimmy Carter
That Hearty Yankee Bullshit
Buffered, Biffled, and Baffled
Belief in the Divinity of Caffeine Free Diet Christ
The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Podcasters
Another Election Day at the Nonchurch of the Freely Associated Temporary Denizens of The Great Internet Brain Iron
Crashing Into Things at Top Speed for Truth and Victory
Not Locally Real
As Rudy Giuliani says, "With Absolute Power Comes Sudden and Startling Wisdom and Maturity"
Productivity Software Malfunction
The New York Jets Phase of the American Experiment
There's Always a Foghorn / Singing You to Schoolwreck
"Unmistakable Latin Flavor"
Power, Privilege, and Farcical Aquatic Ceremonies
How Fancy Peanuts, Men's Health Magazine, and 43 Empty File Folders Herald Societal Collapse
So The Incredible Hulk, Britney Spears, and Mark Strassmann Walk Onto A Rocketship...
A Two Ice Cream Sandwiches Kinda Episode
An Indispensable Civic Exercise
Everyone is Born, and Other Incontrovertible Truths
Three Friends Beneath One Ceiling Tapestry Part II
Tickling Our Own Priors Bone
The Only Reason To Go To Your Neighbor's Open House
The Paranoid Style in American Podcasting
Justice Thomas Lights the Way