All Episodes

Episode 233: HyperNormalisation

Episode 232: "Everyone Left Their Morals at the Curb"

Cold Brew Conversations XI: Kristen Toomey

Episode 231: Caught in the Closed Fist of the Bean

Episode 230: Overheard in the Tanker Line at The Straight of Hormuz

Episode 229: The Odyssey, Starring Dave Grohl

Cold Brew Conversations X: Rich Wexler

Episode 228: Free Solo V - Drinking 6 Beers in 15 Minutes

Episode 227: A Band Called "Head Hands & Feet"

Episode 226: I Have Some Bad News, and I Have Some Bad News

Episode 225: Robot Tongues Licking Laundry Detergent

Episode 224: Cold Brew Neanderthals!

Episode 223: Fans of the Financial Industry Should Skip This Episode

Episode 222: Let Them Eat Waymos

Episode 221: Aldous Harding Making Weird Noises at the Business Meeting

Episode 220: "The Cold Brewest Story Ever Told"

Episode 219: This is a Punk Rock Podcast

Episode 218: Putting Things on Shelves in the Metaverse

Episode 217: The Toad's Eyes Shone With Unusual Brilliancy

Episode 216: Huffington Post Disease

Cold Brew Conversations IX: Chris Locke

Episode 215: Alysa Liu is God

Episode 214: Blackjack

Episode 213: Let Them Eat Opinion Polls

Episode 212: Bruce Springsteen Can't Save Us

Episode 211: 50 Common Bird Sounds

Cold Brew Conversations VIII: Kristen Toomey

Episode 210: Why Are You Covering Me in Hot Foam If You Don't Expect Me to Moan?

Episode 209: Bring the (mouth) Noise!

Episode 208: Every Golfer Voted for Trump

Episode 207: Bill Burr, Bob Dylan and The City of Chicago

Episode 206: X-rated Yelp, Featuring "Short Man G and Dino"

Episode 205: Free Solo IV - The Great Toaster Scam

Episode 204: How Did Brad Pitt Master Hollywood?

Episode 203: Imagine If We Were on a Yacht, but It Felt Just Like Our Regular House!

Episode 202: The Dignity - and Self-Loathing - of the American Working Class

Episode 201: Rocky Mountain High (Ketamine), by John Dunbar

Episode 200: Free Solo III - I'm Your Man

Episode 199: Paying for Dinner with Peacock Feathers

Episode 198: The Grunge Report

Episode 197: Americans Think Major Brands Are Their Friends

Episode 196: Pretty Take Machine™

Episode 195: If You Have a Train Set, You Have Low T

Episode 194: Jedi Brown

Episode 193: Sexual Pursuits - The Vape Flavor

Episode 192: Free Solo II

Episode 191: Free Solo

Cold Brew Conversations VII: Comedian/Musician Rick Wood

Episode 190: All Jokers, No Batmen

Episode 189: F*ck Jelly Roll

Episode 188: Undo Your Whole Childhood by Breathing Funny for Ten Minutes a Day!

Episode 187: Let Them Eat Milton Friedman

Episode 186: Self-help in the Time of Cholera

Cold Brew Conversations VI: Author/Filmmaker Alex R. Johnson

Episode 185: Ketamine Meet-and-Greet

Episode 184: Abundance?! How About We Start With...THE BARE MINIMUM

Episode 183: Out-of-hand Amounts of Animosity Toward Political Consultants

Episode 182: Curtis Yarvin and the Myth of the Benevolent Monarch

Episode 181: The Mailman is F*cked Now That Every Building Looks the Same

Episode 180: Let Them Eat Both-Sides Journalism

Episode 179: The Spotify Approach™ to Ending Wars

Episode 178: Spineless Democrats and Self-Driving Hotels

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 2/10/25

Episode 177: The Banality of Blinken

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 2/3/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 1/31/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 1/17/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 1/15/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 1/13/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 1/8/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* RIP Richard Foreman

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 1/3/25

*Good Morning Got Me Like* HAPPY 2025!!!

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/30/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* Christmas 2024

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/23/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/20/2024

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/18/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/16/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/13/24

Episode 176: Adult Jungle Gyms and Cursed Chicken Fingers

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/11/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/9/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/6/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/4/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 12/2/24

Episode 175: COLD BREW CONVERSATIONS with special guest - Comedian Blake Wexler!!!

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/29/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/27/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/25/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/22/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/20/24

Episode 174: First Cup of Coffee After the Election

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/18/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/15/24

Episode 173: COLD BREW CONVERSATIONS - with Special Guest - Writer/Comedian Jamie Loftus!

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/13/24

Episode 172: Elections and Antidepressants

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/11/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/8/2024

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/6/24

Episode 171: We're Paying a Huge Price for These Cat Videos

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/4/24

Episode 170: COLD BREW CONVERSATIONS: Chris Talks with a Special Guest - Comedian Greg Edwards!

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 11/1/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/30/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/28/24

Episode 169: HUMPHREY GO-KART

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/25/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/23/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/21/24

Episode 168: COLD BREW CONVERSATIONS: Chris Talks with a Special Guest - Comedian Allen Strickland Williams!

*GOOD MORNING GOT ME LIKE* 10/18/24

Episode 167: "The Dinner Defense" - the Oligarchs' Final Gambit

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/16/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/14/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/11/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/9/24

Episode 166: COLD BREW CONVERSATIONS: Chris Talks with a Special Guest - Comedian Kristen Toomey!

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/8/24

*Poetry Window* 10/5/24

*Good Morning Got Me Like* 10/4/24

Episode 165: When Live Nation Captures All the Venues, Your City is Finished

Episode 164: The Great American Pastime of Demonizing Public Housing

Episode 163: Kicking the Refrigerator to Get More Cheese Out of It

Episode 162: Leonardo da Vinci - Hipster?

Episode 161: Introspective Monkeys Get the Least Bananas

Episode 160: There's No Such Thing as Netflix After the Power Grid Goes Down

Episode 159: Elon Musk's Helter Skelter

Episode 158: A Chip in Your Head That Pays for Smoothies

Episode 157: The Morbid Dreams of Big Tech

Episode 156: How High Parking Rates Kill Art

Episode 155: Saving America From Pod Save America

Episode 154: Tons of Information - No Power

Episode 153: The Supreme (LOL) Court

Episode 152: Do You Speak Gibb??

Episode 151: Charcuterie is a Psy-Op!

Episode 150: Charles Manson Singing "Since U Been Gone"

Episode 149: A Crofton's History of The United States

Episode 148: Eddie Vedder - Dissident?

Episode 147: It's Time For Us to Confront Powerlifters

Episode 146: Shorty Shea's Monogrammed Luggage

Episode 145: Cold Brew Makes Your Pancreas Sparkle!

Episode 144: Every Skull in the Catacombs Wishes It Was at a Football Game

Episode 143: Chris Health Update (good news!!)

Episode 142: More Amy Goodman, Less Anderson Cooper

Episode 141: The Inner Lives of Circus Strongmen

Episode 140: Stockton Rush's Submersible Honky-Tonk

Episode 139: Tennessee Death Trip

Episode 138: Nashville 3.0 and The Liberal Divide

Episode 137: Are Horses Conservative??

Episode 136: Rich People Are Always Talking About Berries

Episode 135: 19th Century Farmers In Therapy

Episode 134: Stockton Rush's "DISRUPTOR" Coffee Cup

Episode 133: Chris Broke His Scapula

Episode 132: Chris vs Himself

Episode 131: Funny Girl, starring Kurt Cobain

Episode 130: Throwing Pies at Oligarchs

Episode 129: A Flying F*ck Into a Rolling Donut

Episode 128: Choreographing Content

Episode 127: The Shoplifting False Flag

Episode 126: I Can't Fill My Pipe Without Being Interrupted

Episode 125: Hair X™

Episode 124: Gold Bars With Wheels On 'Em

Episode 123: Self-driving Cars Will Become Sentient and Run Us All Over

Episode 122: Nashville Confidential with Chris Crofton™

Episode 121: What About Cold Yoga?!

Episode 120: The Cops are Quiet Quitting

Episode 119: Ayn Rand, Moron

Episode 118: The Chris Crofton Telethon

Episode 117: 2001 Dalmatians

Episode 116: Jann Wenner Stole Kids' Allowances and Gave Them to Mick Jagger

Episode 115: Robert Downey Jr.'s Sustainable Malibu Home

Episode 114: Jake Gyllenhaal's Cappuccino

Episode 113: The Greased Watermelon

Episode 112: Backstage at The National with Mom

Episode 111: 13,000 Votes

Episode 110: White People Love The Shawshank Redemption

Episode 109: Put Headphones on Your Houseplants

Episode 108: Cold Brew Roofers™

Episode 107: "Dish Pit"- The Movie

Episode 106: The Supreme Joke

Episode 105: The Submersible Libertarian

Episode 104: Shifty Shellshock's TED Talk

Episode 103: How to Stop Worrying and Love the Trickle Down

Episode 102: John Philip Cold Brew

Episode 101: Privatizing Billy Joel

Episode 100: EPISODE 100!!!!!!

Episode 99: Chris Talks About Being at Woodstock 99...Again!

Episode 98: Let Them Eat Stadiums

Episode 97: Blood, Sweat & Gerrymandering

Episode 96: Gavin Rossdale's Poetry

Episode 95: The "Tennessee Three"

Episode 94: America's Gun Disgrace

Episode 93: Rupert Murdoch's Beach Bod

Episode 92: The Lies of Larry Summers

Episode 91: E-Z Listening For Billionaires

Episode 90: Jacques Cousteau - Cold Brew Icon

Episode 89: The Kennedys Were a Boy Band

Episode 88: Eat Cans Like a Goat™

Episode 87: Rick Rubin's Front Door

Episode 86: Cold Brew for Mayor!

Episode 85: The Modern Stoned™

Episode 84: Skate Bird vs Puberty

Episode 83: Cold Brew for the Elderly™

Episode 82: "His name was Laugh Out Loud Creme, apparently"

Episode 81: Billie Jean King's Greatest Hits

Episode 80: John Denver's Amaretto Sour

Episode 79: Poverty is the Ultimate Radicalizer

Episode 78: The Cold Brew Pipeline

Episode 77: Crofton Cheesesteaks™

Episode 76: Cold Brew Gentrification

Episode 75: I Like Coffee and Old Clothes

Episode 74: Tangerine Dreaming

Episode 73: Steven Tyler's Toes

Episode 72: Thirty Woodchucks

Episode 71: Pumpkin Creamed

Episode 70: Neon Fire Trucks Squirting Hair Gel

Episode 69: The Sexxx Episode

Episode 68: King Kong at the Beach

Episode 67: You Wanna Piece of Me Saltwater Taffy??

Episode 66: Cold Brew Joan Didion

Episode 65: Baby Knows I Like to Be Excited

Episode 64: Tipping Grandma on the App

Episode 63: Fill the Fool's Cup!

Episode 62: Irish Snow

Episode 61: From Pirates to Playwrights

Episode 60: Funneling Dust

Episode 59: The Ultimate Piece of Cheese

Episode 58: Leonardo da Coldbrew

Episode 57: Iggy Pop: Bourgeois Pig??

Episode 56: Gofundme Bigfoot

Episode 55: Guns and Neanderthals

Episode 54: United States of Independent Contractors

Episode 53: The Eddie Vedder Variety Hour

Episode 52: Starstruck By Bookstore Clerks

Episode 51: Billionaires are Hoarders

Episode 50: Square Dancing With a Mouse

Episode 49: Sports Fans Love Promo Junk

Episode 48: Cold Brew Makes You Twice as Tall™

Episode 47: The Only Podcast Discussing the Oscar Slap

Episode 46: Chris Martin's Hairline

Episode 45: Racy John Fogerty

Episode 44: Goldendoodles are Hairy Roombas

Episode 43: Jay Sebring Chasing Clint Eastwood With a Blow Dryer

Episode 42: January 6th Was Woodstock for Confused People

Episode 41: Chris Complains About Dua Lipa

Episode 40: Phone Call to a Bridge

Episode 39: Cloak Boy

Episode 38: When Axl Rose Got His Teeth Fixed

Episode 37: I Thought That Rascal Was Somewhere Having a Milkshake

Episode 36: UFO or Food Truck??

Episode 35: Is Your Carpet Ankle-deep? Why not??

Episode 34: Sex Coffee

Episode 33: Pinky the Cat

Episode 32: Box Trucks Gettin Crew Cuts

Episode 31: Captain Nemo is an American

Episode 30: Racism At The Ryman

Episode 29: William Shatner Boldly Goes Where Plenty of People Have Gone Before

Episode 28: Vanilla Coffee Tastes Like Vanilla

Episode 27: Ghost Hunter Makeover

Episode 26: Mr. Coffee’s Sea Serpents

Episode 25: You Bloody Fool

Episode 24: Eight O’ Clock Coffee in a French Press

Episode 23: Honeymooning on a Merchant Marine Vessel

Episode 22: Outback Hipster

Episode 21: The Terrible Consequences of “American Exceptionalism”

Episode 20: Don’t Be Afraid to Say You Don’t Like Smoking a Pipe

Episode 19: It's Texas where I am

Episode 18: Revolutionary War Rockabilly

Episode 17: Branson? Not a Fan, Son

Episode 16: John DeLorean, Watch Salesman

Episode 15: Homunculus in a Bathing Suit

Episode 14: Stairway to Trauma

Episode 13: Bozo Bezos Goes to Space

Episode 12: Action Bowling and Rolaids

Episode 11: Murderer Refuses to Closee Video Store

Episode 10: Cold Brew High Dive

Episode 9: 18 Bones

Episode 8: Jim Morrison's Son Cliff!

Episode 7: The Mad Canadian

Episode 6: Do What Thou Wilt at Niagara Falls

Episode 5: Are Yetis Just Introverts?

Episode 4: The Doors of Poor Reception

Episode 3: Testing EVP Ghost Dating Apps in the Field

Episode 2: Speculating Wildly About The Badge Man

Episode 1: Warm Milk w/ Bertie Higgins & Sonny Limbo