Everyone Gets a Trophy cover art

All Episodes

Everyone Gets a Trophy — 443 episodes

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Title
1

The Big Beautiful Beaver

2

What Did The 2026 NFL Draft Tell Us About Texas & The Future Of CFB

3

Emptying The Notebook On The Texas Scrimmage

4

Schloss Returns To College Station, More Spring Football Hype

5

Spring Cleaning

6

The Ultimate Texas-Purdue Basketball Preview

7

Spring Thoughts, The Resurgence Of The Veer N Shoot, Grass vs. Turf

8

Longhorns Rock The 2026 NFL Combine

9

2026 Post Portal Inventory: Defense/Special Teams

10

Playoff Expansion, Frostbacks & Finnish Snipers

11

State of The Programs

12

Did Texas Win The Portal? Evaluating Texas' Portal Losses

13

2026 Post Portal Inventory: Offense

14

We Are Muschampions, My Friend

15

Michigan Has No Moore Coach

16

Aggie Thumping & Clueless Committees

17

Rivalry Week Is Here

18

Bacon Makes Everything Better

19

Raiders Of The Lost Arky

20

The Big Game against Georgia & the LSU Clown Show

21

The Best Jobs In College Football & Vandy With Randy

22

Sark & His Staff Challenges

23

The Texas Offense Is Broken

24

Texas Whips OU & Previewing Kentucky

25

Beat OU

26

The Red River Shootout Is Here

27

In A While, Crocodile

28

Evaluating Texas & The SEC Before Conference Play

29

Fighting QB Yips, BB Gun Wars & Greenies

30

What's Wrong With Arch & The Offense?

31

Longhorn Football Team Scout After Week 2

32

Do You Know The Way To San Jose

33

Longhorn Football Team Scout After Week 1

34

Fallen Arch

35

The Horseshoe & Hand Grenades (or Arch Bombs)

36

The SEC Goes To 9 Conference Games!

37

Elite 2nd Down Play Callers & Dominican Weddings

38

Two Time All State Punter

39

SEC Rankings, Should Kids Play Football, What Could Sabotage The 2025 Season?

40

Football Numerology Predicts A Texas National Title

41

Randy's Reading Corner

42

If He Ain't Going to Hell, There's No Use In Having One

43

Baseball Revamp, Elko's Aggie Indoctrination, Solving the CFP

44

The Journey To Omaha Begins

45

How Dallas Conquered Houston

46

The Gypsum Kings

47

Post Spring Football & Sweeping Aggies

48

Pareto's Portal

49

SEC Breakout Or Step Back Contenders

50

Texas Excels, Aggies Fail

51

Sark Speaks & Baseball Dominates

52

Hakuna Akina

53

We're Back!

54

Today's Jack Sawyer

55

Beat the Buckeyes

56

Holy Fork

57

Exorcise The Devils

58

Tiger By The Tail

59

Win The Whole Damn Thing

60

Aggie Stomping

61

Crush The Aggies

62

The Playoff Race Intensifies

63

It's Bacon!

64

Tricks & Treats

65

Dawgs Debrief & Diego Dichotomy

66

Why Texas Beats Georgia

67

Sooners Boomed, Bulldogs Next

68

Sooners, Chimps & Gas Cans

69

How Texas Beats Oklahoma

70

Without Stones There Is No Arch

71

Auburn Has A 3rd & Long Coach

72

This Bulldog Won't Hunt

73

Roadrunner Road Kill

74

Fading The Sooners & Aggies

75

Blowing Up The Big House

76

Wolverines Are Just Cranky Ferrets

77

The Big House Week 2 Best Bets

78

CFB Week 1 Betting & Analysis

79

Avoid Boyd

80

RB Complications

81

Why Texas Beats Michigan

82

2024 College Football Season Win Totals

83

Texas & the SEC

84

Your Schloss Is Our Gain

85

A New Direction In Texas Baseball

86

Can Texas Pull It Off?

87

The Most Important Games In DKR History

88

Half Baked Shoguns

89

The Longhorn Draft, Pac 12 Seppuku & Meat Snobbery

90

Spring Game & NFL Draft Talk

91

Multisport Musing

92

2024 Spring Game Preview

93

Randy With A Y

94

Moose Outside Should Have Told You

95

Texas Stars Shine At The NFL Combine

96

The Man From Maracaibo

97

Playoffs? We're Talking About Playoffs?

98

Two Conferences Matter

99

What Might Have Been

100

Husky Is A Kid's Jean Size

101

Tough Sledding For The Huskies

102

Pour Some Sugar On Me

103

Recruiting Xmas Comes Early

104

NSD1 Recruiting Class Review

105

Viral Hot Takes!

106

Let The Good Times Roll

107

Pocket Penix

108

More Cowboys Breakdown & Playoff Permutations

109

Considering The Cowboys -- Big 12 Title Game Preview

110

Sand Aggy Pyre, Regular Aggie Hire Part 2

111

Sandy Aggy Pyre, Regular Aggie Hire Part 1

112

Red Raider Rationalization

113

Frogsplainin' & The Jumbo Jimbo Buyout

114

The College Football Playoff Kaleidoscope

115

Texas Declaws The Cats In A Thriller

116

Play The Greatest Hits

117

Ringo 5 Star, Maalik Murphy & Michigan Malfeasance

118

Slaying Urban Cougars

119

Houston Means I'm One Day Closer To You

120

There Will Be Blood

121

Prosecuting Land Thieves

122

Initiate Hate Week

123

The Real Contenders

124

Baylor Gets A Beatdown

125

Baylor Breakdown, Sark's Duality & Prime Time Musings

126

Why?-oming

127

Ride For The Brand

128

Texas Turns The Tide In Tuscaloosa

129

Alabama Reaction: Boone's Bama Victory Lap

130

It's Bama Week

131

Rice Reaction

132

Crimson Floors & Cream Ceilings: The 2023 Oklahoma Sooner Schedule Breakdown

133

Texas Special Teams Breakdown: The Elite Indicator

134

Texas Offensive Line Breakdown: Banks For Everything!

135

Texas Defensive Line Breakdown: Beauty Is On The Inside

136

That's Gonna Leave A Yormark

137

Texas Wide Receiver & Tight End Breakdown: Among The National Elite

138

Texas Defensive Back Breakdown: To D Or Not To D

139

Texas Linebacker Breakdown: Gbenda But Don't Break

140

Texas Quarterback Breakdown: Ewers Emerging

141

Texas Running Back Breakdown: Is Brooks the Bell Cow?

142

Recruiting News & Bama Blues

143

2 Star Culture

144

A Card Laid Is A Card Played

145

Gotta Let Joe Cook

146

Recruiting Is Destiny

147

If We Ran College Football

148

SEC Schedules & Cardinal Sins

149

Texas Drinks Miami's Brisket Milkshake

150

Get Your Tom Tom On

151

Guzzling Kool Aid

152

Texas Spring Game: Defense

153

Texas Spring Game: Offense

154

Terry Town

155

March Gladness

156

Applebees Singularity

157

SEC Bound

158

Are You Familiar With The Work of Mr Darwin?

159

Portal Kombat

160

Goodbye To A Pirate

161

Bijan Baptizes Baylor

162

Sarkopenia

163

Raining Cats and Frogs

164

Rough Waters In Stillwater

165

Cowboy Up

166

Can't Spell Shutout Without OU

167

Hate Weak

168

Beating Vegas Week 5

169

Westbound & Down

170

Targeting Tech

171

Beating Vegas Week 4

172

Beating Vegas Week 3

173

Tide Heartbreak & Acme Jet Skates

174

Pain Heals, Chicks Dig Scars, Glory Lasts Forever

175

Beating Vegas: Week 2

176

"What Even is a Warhawk?" - The 1-0 Podcast

177

The Monroe Doctrine

178

Beating Vegas: Week 1

179

Depth Charts & Monkey Slander

180

"Going Camping" - The 1-0 Podcast

181

Next Men Up: Part Deux

182

Next Men Up

183

QB Battles & Joe-orts

184

The Joe Cook Accountability Project

185

The Bobfather Part II

186

The Bobfather Part I

187

The Be Nice Big Board

188

"Big 12 Media Daze" - The 1-0 Podcast

189

Media Daze & Longhorn/Aggie Recruiting Wars

190

Realignment Musical Chairs & Sark Optimism

191

"Will the Real Burnt Orange Please Stand Up?" - The 1-0 Podcast

192

The 2022 Burnt Orange Bible Is Here!

193

Precocious Pod

194

"The Arch Effect... and SPORTS" - The 1-0 Podcast

195

One Time, At Manning Camp

196

Arch de Triomphe

197

Going To The Wells

198

Gerry Hamilton Brings The Recruiting Heat

199

Agent Orange Destroys The Jungle

200

"Welcome to the Jungle" - The 1-0 Podcast

201

Boone's Farm League

202

Two Wins From Omaha

203

Texas Baseball Breakdown w/Randy Boone

204

Thumb On The Scales

205

Gladiators & Eunuchs

206

Despicable Saint Nick

207

"Crossing the River Jordan" - The 1-0 Podcast

208

What's Your Safety Word?

209

House Of Pancakes

210

Victory Has Defeated You

211

"NILlionaire w/ Justin Wells" - 1-0 Podcast

212

Where Is Your Savior

213

"Spring of Sarkisian" - The 1-0 Podcast

214

Spring Fling

215

We Can Only Go Up From Here

216

Wide Receiver Believers

217

Tightening Up Loose Ends

218

Vive Bijan!

219

Could God Create A Coburn He Can't Lift?

220

"Moro Money, Moro Problems" - The 1-0 Podcast

221

"Full Force Football" - The 1-0 Podcast

222

Rock Chalk Rally & Mailbag Musings

223

Top 5 All-Time Longhorn WRs

224

"Spring Cleaning" - The 1-0 Podcast

225

March Gladness, March Sadness

226

"This. Is. March." - The 1-0 Podcast

227

Vertical Chump

228

"Perry Ellis Senior Day" - The 1-0 Podcast

229

Grambling On Your Reputation

230

"Beard Pierce-ing" - The 1-0 Podcast

231

Disching It Up

232

Longhorns In A China Shop

233

"Pay Heed, All Who Enter: Beware of 'The Drum'" - The 1-0 Podcast

234

Performance Enhancing Pod

235

"Red Raided" - The 1-0 Podcast

236

Goodbye to the GOAT

237

The Purple Consigliere

238

"Will the Beard Grow on Us?" - The 1-0 Podcast

239

"Beauty and the Beard" - The 1-0 Podcast

240

Portals & Playoffs

241

Tip Your Stetson

242

Welcome To 2022

243

"2021 Year in Review" - The 1-0 Podcast

244

"Sark Called Bank(s)" - The 1-0 Podcast

245

Why You Always Gotta Bring Up Rocky Marciano?

246

Ewers Always On My Mind

247

"Texas House of Pancakes" - The 1-0 Podcast

248

The Longhorn NIL Explosion

249

The Masshole Reckoning

250

Los Angeles, Land of Lincoln

251

"Burnt Turkey" - The 1-0 Podcast

252

Jive Turkey

253

“Rock (Chalk) Bottom” - The 1-0 Podcast

254

Dust On The Win

255

"Bo Knows" - The 1-0 Podcast

256

Aim High, Ames Low

257

An Ode To A Toad

258

Don't Be A Candy Ass

259

“Bye Week & Beard” - The 1-0 Podcast

260

Poked

261

"Gundy and Pokey" - The 1-0 Podcast

262

That One Hurt

263

"It's (Insert Time You're Reading This) and ou Still Sucks" - The 1-0 Podcast

264

Why Does QB Make Us Crazy?

265

"Gare Bear” - The 1-0 Podcast

266

Panty Raiders

267

“Little Big Twelve” - The 1-0 Podcast

268

Filling Up On Rice

269

"Hogwash" - The 1-0 Podcast

270

Hogtied

271

Bloody Exercises, Bloodless Battles

272

"It's TIIMMEEEEEEEE" - The 1-0 Podcast

273

Can Card Come Up Aces?

274

"The Season Pre-Preview" - The 1-0 Podcast

275

Is Strength Ever A Weakness?

276

Critical Fanboys

277

KD's Top 10 Texas Football Games

278

The Sweet Nectar Of Fall

279

The Irate Eight

280

Texas To The SEC

281

"SEC You Later, Big 12" - The 1-0 Podcast

282

2021 Big 12 Win Predictions

283

Ranking the Big 12 coaches

284

"Big Questions Facing the Big 12" - The 1-0 Podcast

285

Horn Recruitin' & Phil Steele Sex Appeal

286

"Putting the Texas Season to Bed(nar)" - The 1-0 Podcast

287

Impact Football Transfers

288

"Extended Stay (In Omaha)" - The 1-0 Podcast

289

Burnt Orange Conquers Day-Glo

290

Omaha, Baby

291

"Super Size Me" - The 1-0 Podcast

292

Mess With The Bulls & You'll Get The Horns

293

Trophy Mailbag & SEC alignment

294

The Trophy Mailbag: Part I

295

Ragin Cajuns & Angry Hogs

296

"Happy Birthday, VY" - The 1-0 Podcast

297

Fake Accents

298

"Tell Me Whatcha Want, Whatcha Really Really Want - The 1-0 Podcast

299

Digging In On The Draft

300

All Football

301

"The Spring (Game) Has Sprung" - The 1-0 Podcast

302

UT Potpourri on 4/20

303

"Skipping School(er) With Bijan" - The 1-0 Podcast

304

The Latino Bambino

305

"Fear the Beard" - The 1-0 Podcast

306

Keep Austin Beard

307

Everybody Love Everybody

308

"Out With the Old, In With the New" - The 1-0 Podcast

309

Spring Cleaning

310

Gonna Shaka The Nation

311

"Texas Tournament Trailer" - The 1-0 Podcast

312

The Eyes Have It

313

"February (Recruiting) Heat Wave" - The 1-0 Podcast

314

Arctic Spring

315

The Top 5 All-Time Longhorn RB’s

316

2021 Recruiting Wrap Up

317

Super Bowles

318

“Bear Market” - The 1-0 Podcast

319

Support Rather Than Illumination

320

Stoops? Oops!

321

"Ten (Assistants) in Texas" - The 1-0 Podcast

322

The Pole Assassin

323

“Texas Joins the Sark Side” - The 1-0 Podcast

324

Honeymoon Gas

325

“Which Sark Pun Should We Use First?” - The 1-0 Podcast

326

Great Sarkcess!

327

Alamo Bold

328

“Re-Remember the Alamo” - The 1-0 Podcast

329

T'was The Night

330

"Alright Class..." - The 1-0 Podcast

331

Parks & Wreck

332

Urban Decline

333

"Smart Moves" - The 1-0 Podcast

334

Black Friday

335

Three Byes Makes It A Bowl Game

336

"Campbell's Chunky" - The 1-0 Podcast

337

Bleeding Kansas

338

“Country Roads & Shaka’s Start” - The 1-0 Podcast

339

Stills Waters Run Shallow

340

"Progress Reports" - The 1-0 Podcast

341

Ambivalent Triumph

342

"Ewers So Vain" - The 1-0 Podcast

343

Smashing Bumpkins

344

"Bears, Damned Bears and Statistics" - The 1-0 Podcast

345

You're So Money & You Don't Even Hire Like It

346

"Eyes on Herman" - The 1-0 Podcast

347

It's The Hope That Kills You

348

"On the Precipice - Texas-OU Edition" - The 1-0 Podcast

349

Hate Week Commences

350

It's Touchdown!

351

"25 Percent (Tortilla) Capacity" - The 1-0 Podcast

352

Risky Business

353

"The Big 12's Problems Are Not Mine(r)" - The 1-0 Podcast

354

Indecency With A Miner

355

Always Bet On Black

356

"43 Points. Too High? Too Low? Or Just Right?" - The 1-0 Podcast

357

Longhorn Free Agent Additions

358

"On the Defensive" - The 1-0 Podcast

359

Forde Yard Bash

360

"Getting Offensive" - The 1-0 Podcast

361

Merry Quinnmas & Okie Agendas

362

Take Your Ball & Go Home

363

The Top 5 All-Time Longhorn TE's

364

"Cook Returns to the Kitchen" - The 1-0 Podcast

365

Shark Attacks & Orangutan Strength

366

Going Gaskamping

367

"The Eyes of Texas are Not Upon the Brock Two" - The 1-0 Podcast

368

The Top 5 All-Time Texas QBs

369

The Ultimate Texas & Big 12 Football Preview is here

370

"The GOAT of all GOATS, Joey Chestnut" - The 1-0 Podcast

371

Baylor Baptism

372

A Cook Leaves The Kitchen

373

"What's Podcasted Here Changes the World" - The 1-0 Podcast

374

Say Goodbye To The Eyes?

375

Debating The Top Tier College Programs

376

"Telling Times at Texas" - The 1-0 Podcast

377

Cheap Eats Austalgia

378

College Football Is Coming Back

379

"Mixed Martial Arts for Dummies" - The 1-0 Podcast feat. Paul Wadlington of EGAT

380

MJ Got Jaundice

381

Black Market Haircuts & Sneaky Chin-ups

382

Horns & Bulls

383

"Don't Rock Jerry's Boat" - The 1-0 Podcast

384

Philly Egg Special

385

The Last Dance & College Football's Last Chance

386

"Texas is Back... in the Draft" - The 1-0 Podcast

387

Thai Harems & College Hypocrisy

388

NFL Participation Trophies & Big 12 Win Totals

389

Viral Virtue

390

"Texas Three Step" - The 1-0 Podcast

391

Don't Let The Time Do You

392

O'Brien's Glaucoma Herb Prescription

393

"The Texas Side of the Story" - The 1-0 Podcast

394

Flattening The COVID-19 Curve

395

Don't Mock The Draft

396

"What's the Smart Decision?" - The 1-0 Podcast

397

The Freaks Come Out In Indy

398

Measuring Up

399

Everybody Hurts

400

"Texas Baseball Season Preview" - Everyone Gets a 1-0 Podcast

401

That's Omeire

402

"cloUT Class Critique" - The 1-0 Podcast

403

$17 Bud Lights & Shakira

404

Eli Eli No

405

"Your Next Coach Is..." - The 1-0 Podcast

406

Shanahan System RB Foam Party

407

"How The Hinch Stole a Podcast" - The 1-0 Podcast

408

Tiger Bait

409

"2020 Football Fix-Ins" - The 1-0 Podcast

410

Hold That Tiger

411

NFL Playoff Preview

412

Making Utah Our Wives

413

"Garrote Garrett" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

414

WHEN A-OK IS NOT OK

415

"Ash & Burn" - The 1-0 Podcast

416

Atomic Aggies

417

Spread your wings Tom

418

"As The Coordinator Carousel Turns" - The 1-0 Podcast

419

We're Back Baby!

420

Coaching Baby Bib

421

"When you Turtle, it ends with Assalley" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

422

"Beaten in a Dark Assalley" - The 1-0 Podcast

423

"Taking Dead Ames" - The 1-0 Podcast

424

"Guys Named Todd" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

425

"Body Surfing" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

426

"The Sky(lar) is the Limit" - The 1-0 Podcast

427

"Does Fort Worth Ever Cross Your Mind?" - The 1-0 Podcast/Everyone Gets a Trophy

428

"No _efense for That" - The 1-0 Podcast

429

"Astro World" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

430

"How the Grinch Stole the Red River" - The 1-0 Podcast

431

"Witness Protection" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

432

"We Hate yOU" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

433

"Howdy Folks" - The 1-0 Podcast

434

"Couch Burning & Moonshine Churning" - The 1-0 Podcast

435

"Paint Like Mozart" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

436

"C's Get Degrees" - The 1-0 Podcast

437

"Mascot Fight" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

438

"The Mullet Man & The Three Triplets" - The 1-0 Podcast

439

"Lion Moms" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

440

"Putting the Texas Defense in a Jam(balaya)" - The 1-0 Podcast

441

"Orlando Blues" - Everyone Gets a Trophy

442

#6 Meets #9. The Nicest Football Game of the Year - "The 1-0 Podcast"

443

"Fat Ex-Girlfriend" - Everyone Gets a Trophy