All Episodes

EP 104 – “I don't expect you to dream about me”

EP 103 – “I'm being ghosted by my own therapist”

EP 102 – “Were you being poisoned by your Dad?”

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 9 - "I had to do a funny walk 8 times"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 8 - "I honestly don't care what you think"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 7 - "Would you trust a hairdresser with no hair"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 6 - "That's the most impressive thing your body has ever done"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 5 - "I'm 90% sure you're a figment of my imagination"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 4 - "At no point have I wished you dead"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 3 - "Would you be a full time baby?"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 2 - "We were both watching him to see if he died"

NON-REFUNDABLE EP 1 - "We were having a threesome once"

EP 101 – “Why are your testicles like grapefruits?”

EP 100 – “You just rubbed my breast”

EP 99 – “It’s just him shouting at poor people”

EP 98 – “I couldn’t think of anything I’d like less”

EP 97 – “I hope they rig his bungee cord to snap”

EP 96 – “I think I’m going to die so can we reschedule?”

EP 95 – “If I don’t have children I’ll have chickens”

EP 94 – “Everyone in the country hates me”

EP 93 – “I haven’t relaxed since I was in the womb”

EP 92 – “I don’t want to see a doctor about anything”

EP 91 – ”Whatever I say intoxicated doesn’t count”

EP 90 – ”As if there’s not enough reasons to hate TikTok”

EP 89 – ”9/10 episodes end with you being angry at me”

EP 88 – ”It’s funny because it didn’t happen to us”

EP 87 – ”I thought I was gonna get stabbed”

EP 86 – ”If you’re gonna flash you wear a trench coat”

EP 85 – ”Smiling behind the tears”

EP 84 – ”I’m just a big sweaty man”

EP 83 – "I’m annoyed because he’s right"

EP 82 – "I’m not hip enough for TikTok"

EP 81 – "If you want to marry your sister, fine"

EP 80 – "Aren’t horses so arrogant?"

EP 79 – "But he was a funny racist"

EP 78 – "I’m a bad husband aren’t I?"

EP 77 – "I had a lockdown breakdown"

EP 76 – "Another year closer to death"

EP 75 – "I like drinking during the day"

EP 74 – "I’ll be there to hold you when you fail"

EP 73 – "I’ve always looked about 30"

EP 72 – "You can see France from Calais"

EP 71 – "I'd apologise but I think you're a prick"

EP 70 – "I got married and it was alright"

EP 69 – "We do not fact check on this show"

EP 68 – "He used to put his car keys in the fridge"

EP 67 – "It's fair to cut your own ballsack"

EP 66 - "I love me a Sikh"

EP 65 – "What have turtles ever done for me?"

EP 64 – Short Connection - Lockdown Minisode

EP 63 – "I've never been described as wacky before"

EP 62 – "That's not the Brexit I voted for"

EP 61 – "You're playing in the garden with a ball like a ten year old"

EP 60 – Slurred Connection (Drunk Episode 2)

EP 59 – "Portsmouth is a poor mans Dubai"

EP 58 – "You shouldn't trust OJ Simpson with a baseball bat"

EP 57 – "You were on the floor a lot, writhing in pain"

EP 56 – "And there's some bloke milking an owl"

EP 55 – "I almost got drunk on oxygen"

EP 54 – "They were nice to me which pissed me off"

EP 53 – "I never said it DIDN'T have my piss in it"

EP 52 – "Literally all of Brazil is on fire"

EP 51 – "You can't call Pepper Pig a dickhead"

EP 50 – "I went to a seafood disco & pulled a mussel"

EP 49 – "You're gonna have to volley this rabbit"

EP 48 – "Did you sh*t in a bucket?"

EP 47 – "You resemble a Nazi don't you?"

EP 46 – "I'd recognise your arse anywhere Jason"

EP 45 – "Who wants to drink your urine?"

EP 44 – "I'm not socialising, f*ck that" ft. Toby

EP 43 – "Boris Johnson will motorboat the Queen"

EP 42 – "I know what a cam session is!"

EP 41 – "Just don't be deaf"

EP 40 – Lame of Thrones ft. Carlyle

EP 39 – "You f**cked your brother for 5 years"

EP 38 – "I proposed and she said nothing"

EP 37 – "I nearly punted that kid in the face"

EP 36 – "If I'd known it was a fundrasing event I wouldn't have gone"

EP 35 – "Your Nana still buys you Easter Eggs?"

EP 34 – "You look like a person who'd be a drag queen"

EP 33 – "I had about seven men grab my testicles"

EP 32 – "You wouldn't want a printer thrown at you"

EP 31 – "I wouldn't trust R. Kelly to babysit"

EP 30 – "Why is everyone a paedo?"

EP 29 – "You don't own the concept of fishbowls"

EP 28 – "Can you get an abortion for a food baby?"

EP 27 – "Do NOT lick that mouse!"

EP 26 – "How often do you clean your penis?“

EP 25 – "At least she didn't piss on the curtains“

EP 24 – "You've got a big ballsack mate so go for it“

EP 23 – "I like spicy food but spicy food does not like me“

EP 22 – "You are the human equivalent of a fatberg Jason“

EP 21 – "I got so drunk I head-butted a snake“

EP 20 – "New Years Eve is basically Christmas for alcoholics“

EP 19 – “Merry Christmas… and who the fuck are you?”

EP 18 – “Can sniffer dogs melt steal beams?”

EP 17 – “I would shank Rudolf 100%”

EP 16 – “I didn’t wee on your dog did I?”

EP 15 – Slurred Connection (Drunk Episode)

EP 14 – “Men can actually train themselves to lactate”

EP 13 – “I’ve never seen so many pictures of willies before”

EP 12 – “You never know when you’re gonna have to use your AIDS”

EP 11 – “You don’t have to lose your foreskin to become a vicar”

EP 10 – “He’s like 7 inches flaccid!”

EP 9 – “Mike Tyson’s neck looks like an elephant’s leg”

EP 8 – “You do realise Leprechauns are fictional creatures Tom?”

EP 7 – “Don’t mention my Nazi rallies”

EP 6 – “He had a man bun so I knew he was a bitch”

EP 5 – “I’d throw hot coffee over an orphan”

EP 4 – “No one breastfeeds by accident Kyle”

EP 3 - "Slenderman should try Omegle"

Ep 2 - "Don't fight me with your fists, fight me with your words"

Ep 1 - "I bought it in May and wrote it off in August"