All Episodes
The Cavalry — 327 episodes
"You Could Be A Chewer"
"How Much Money Are You Gonna Sink Into Your Pogo Stick?"
"If You Start A Fire, And Then Put It Out, No One's Impressed"
"Quick Think Of More Soccer Names"
"Matching Gary Jerseys"
"We Don't Like To Get Political"
"Rules Were Made To Be Broken"
"I Love My Kids More Than Anything, But..."
"I'm Sick, But I'm Starving"
"No Male Book Clubs"
"Guess Who Came Back Crawling"
"Big News Around Here.. Got An Oil Change"
"Yarrrr Matey"
"No Consent! No Consent!"
"That's Not 311"
"My Daughter Could Be Pissing In That Bush"
"Here's Your Silverware Back"
"Whatever I Ate Gets A Bad Wrap"
"Just Stick A Penny In There"
"I Didn't Know You Were Leashed"
"The Back Bottom Part"
"OK I'm Ready To Go Where Are My Beers I'm Taking?"
"Doggie's At Target"
"They Just Kept Popping Up!"
"You're Dying At The Same Part Every Time"
Episode 300!
"Little Protein Packs"
"T#$s and Video Game Controllers"
"Driver Might Be Tired"
"You're Comparing Us To Bernie Sanders?!?"
"I Had Diah-Burger King"
"I'm Fine... It's Just Jack And Coke"
"They Probably Did Their Homework"
"Five Seconds Of ACDC"
The Cavalry Live from West Bend!
"The Icelandic Penis Museum"
"How Much Do You Weigh?"
"He Coulda Comped Your Curds"
"Trust Me, It's Not The Costco Hotdog"
"You've Never Heard Of Grandparents Day?!?!"
"Anyway... That Just Put Me In A Bad Mood"
"Mustacheland"
"Zoom Out"
"Oh Man That's Gross... I Better Film This"
"I'm Wearing Eight Shirts Right Now!"
"Knock Knock... Who's There? Fart!"
"Jesus Does Not Get Psychics"
"Sheet Cake Futures"
"Beehns Knows Best"
"You Don't Wanna Go Get Laid... Yuck!"
"I Didn't Look It Up, But I Do Know That I Was Curious"
"The Thirteen Mile Thirsty Throats"
"That's A Bad Break For Butthole Surfers"
"Closed Captioning For Smells"
"Change Your Own Brakes"
"Comedian DESTROYS His Pants"
"David Ryan Adams"
"I Couldn't Come Up With Stupid"
"You're Sinking Again"
"That Wasn't Funny Or Impressive"
"A Patty For Myself"
"You Have To Renounce Your God"
"The Beehner Pipes"
"A Little Stick Drift"
"Well I Could Be A Body"
"What Is Any Of This? How Dare You?"
"Dad! We're Getting Culver's?!"
"The Basketball Tournament For College"
"Kill Johnny"
"He Uses His Frozen Breath To Freeze A Lake"
"It's Also Tough During The Good Times"
"But They Don't Tell You Why"
"Rivereierara Marayarya"
"You Don't Feel A Hole"
"One Second Of Joy"
Brandt Tobler - "I'd Eat Better In Prison"
"How Long Until There's Bad Firefighters?"
"I Don't Think A Void Sounds That Bad"
"My Favorite Part of The Mandalorian is his Jetpack"
"Babies and Scientists"
"The Rooftop Solar Installer Comedian"
"Unless They're For Sandwiches"
"I've Never Heard Of Anyone Wiping Like That"
"So One Night..."
"A Cloud Of Smoke In The Shape Of My Body"
Awkward.. Depressed… Bitter… A Lot Of Complaining
"An Origin Story"
"Bleep Blorp Bleep Blorp"
"That's My Second Favorite Team"
"Each Candidate Gets A Squarespace Page"
"It's Been Over, Pal"
"Nobody's Airplane Made It To The Stage"
"Just A Beef and Cheddar Croissant and the Cheesy Fries"
"Passenger In C 26 D Is Unhappy"
"Let's Not Plan Anything Interesting"
"Lollapo-losers"
"Is He Just Saying A Book?"
"There Are People Watching You Perform To Nobody"
"Ooooh He's Pouring It Down His Pants"
"Good Idea Dad... NOT"
"Strawberry Cream Dr. Pepper Diet Coke"
"I Didn't Say I Want To Smell It"
"I'm A Pretty Fast Learner"
"Don't Forget Your "I Am Cool" Shirt!"
"This Is A Hammer"
"There Should Be Three Settings"
"I'm The I'll Bring Soda And Plates Guy"
"People Assume We're Listening To Ourselves"
"I Know Too Many Magicians"
"One Apple Going In The Cart!"
"Yes, It Is A Blender"
"Well, Microplastics... That's The New Thing"
"She Would Fly And Meet Us There"
"I Got It At This Place Called Pizza Pizza"
"I Wasn't Coming With A Soccer Ball"
"Hey Coach, Feel Free To Get On His Ass"
"Something To Think About"
"Kurt Cobain Reverse Mortgage Commercials"
"Ice Cream of the Future"
"They Medically Roofie You"
"Just Two Double Cheeseburgers"
"Is There Anything Else I Can Help You With?"
"A Buffalo Ranch Kit"
"Kazowie!"
"Last Laughs"
"We Eat Cake After Every Episode"
"Why Don't Scientists Believe in Farts?"
"Temu! Temu!"
"When Did Mickey Mouse Really Make You Laugh?"
"A Four-Hour Bath"
"It's Heavy For One Arm"
"Teacher Bob"
"I Have My Own Bowling Ball"
"Musical Chairs"
"So You Get 9 Hours Of Sleep?"
"They Scored A Bunch And We Never Scored Again"
"Sprinkles Is Still Next To The Ring Camera"
"Twenty Five Percent Of The Couch"
"Anything Helps... I Do Not Like Onions Though"
"Wine Goes In Pink Cups"
"I Looked At The Instructions And They're Some Sort Of Rice"
"They're Doing 20 Percent Off At Kohl's"
"I Wish He'd Just Do My Time"
"Chiropractor Somebody Back To Life"
"Nobody Cares What Titanium Is"
"I Don't Know What A Tamale Is"
Matt Knudsen - "Down To The Johnny Beehner's"
"Doctor, My Daughter's Not A Nerd"
"Keep Your Shoes On, All The Time, No Matter What"
"They Just Suck. Suck Suck Suck Suck Suck"
"And Now IM A Bad Parent... Because Of Max!"
"The Beehner Criterion Collection"
"Pickup/Drop-off"
"Soft Launch"
"Mendovi Farms Festival Thingy"
"And We're Liv... We're Back!"
"We Have A MORE Schwab"
Scott Beehner - "Advice From White Guys"
"A Couple Of Wild Horses Comin' At Ya"
"Guess What The New Batman's Gonna Have..." "Batman?"
"This Was Not A Hit"
"I Think We Did It"
"Three Bedroom Pothole in Carlton"
"You Smell Like The Neighbor Now"
"I Don't Know If You Saw My Instagram Story, But Someone Farted On The Plane"
"I've Heard Of Ranch"
"Did Some RBI's"
"The F Material"
Three Year Anniversary Part 2 with Jason Russell
Christina Walkinshaw - "Three Year Anniversary!"
"Why Can't We Have The Yummy Stuff"
"How Come You Guys Don't Sell These Year Round?"
"Pranked Yaaaaaaaaaa"
"I Wear 36-36 Pants"
"Spiderman Dies"
"Norwegian Nibblers"
"No Midnight Snacks?!?"
"Have You Seen Die Hard 4?"
"Peek-a-boo!"
"Can I Get Two Curder Burgers?"
"If A Horse's Dick Is Electrified.. I'm Out"
"Which Came First Laser Disks or VHS?"
"From A Logic Standpoint..."
“Yoink”
"Hey, Some Of This Isn't Bad"
"In What Context Have You Worn Suspenders?"
"Freezing Isn't That Like An Opinion Question?"
"Say You're Sorry!"
"I'm Not A Big Machines Guy"
"You Gotta Try Zappy's"
"Would You Like This Dirty Rag?"
"Mysteriously Cheaper"
"That's Not Good For McDonalds"
"Who Eats Cake On Christmas?"
"That's A Spicy Impossible Ball"
"Isn't Room Service Just Food Though?"
"Quick Thing On Rainbows"
"Ink By Mail Subscription"
Lawrence Thomas "America's Love Of The Chicken Breast Is Odd To Me"
"The Entire Human History Of Pornography"
"Compunction"
Alvin Williams - "Air Contract Breach"
"Is This Soup?"
"This Is Men's Clothing"
"What Did The Cavemen Drink?"
"So How Do You Buy Bitcoin?"
Josh Sneed - "She's Always Pranking Me Like This"
"Deal With The Big Tall Dumb Idiot"
"Hey.... Butter!"
"What Is The Point Of Gum?"
"Nip It In The Butt"
"A Robust Listenership"
"This Couldn't Be Less Funny"
"Customer Service Johnny"
"Quick Robin, Put Your Mouth On My Bat-Pole"
"It's For My Career"
"The Hat Budget"
"You're Holding Your Fork Like A Giant Again"
Amy Miller - "Feigning Excitement"
"Cowboy Johnny And His Hippie Wife"
"No Garbage Guests"
"It Was So Good.. And I Didn't Puke"
Jono Zalay - "Could Not Have Been Wronger"
"Subjectively... or Objectively??"
Joe Zimmerman - "Shouldn't You Be Better At That Instrument By Now?"
"No It's Accurate, But It's High"
"Well You'd Put A Bag Over Your Hand"
Monica Nevi - "Warm Bud Light And Some Clams"
"You're Colorblind?"
"That's Code For Uggo"
"And We Will See You... The Cavalry!!!"
"You Don't Wanna Hear About How I Got A New Microwave?"
"Watch 'Till The End"
Kevin Bozeman - "Goat Cheese Sandwich"
Dave Williamson "Russian Mistress"
"What If You Have To Print Something?"
"Asparagus Guacamole Soup, Sounds Good!"
Matt Knudsen "You Don't Need To Wear Your Big Pants"
"Anyways, I Got Her A Big Pan"
"Only Domestic Pancakes For You"
Susan Rice - "Hints From An Old Broad"
"Our Podcast Is Good"
Christina Walkinshaw "Wikishoes"
"Maize"
"You Have To Swallow It To Enjoy It"
"I Haven't Always Been A Big Basketball Fan"
Greg Hahn "I Must Be Hummingbird Jones"
"Your Pun-Filled Instructions Promised"
Josh Gondelman - "My Not Quite Big Enough Goalie"
"That's Gonna Lift Me Up"
"The Guru Becomes The Student"
"I'll Be A Bald A#$hole"
"The Sweet Boys"
"Everyone Thinks It Looks Like Ed Grimley"
"Movies Are For The Weekend, TV Shows Are For During The Week"
"You Got A Tummy Ache Already?"
Patreon Teaser - "The Quiz!"
Sean Green - "I'm Pretty Good At Taking A Honk"
"We Did Nothing On Ten, Why Would We Do Something On Eleven?"
Karen Sleighter - "Funeral Funnies"
Steve Rogers - "I Rationed That Jerky"
Maria Shehata and Liz Miele "Aww Who Didn't Like The Hummus"
"All This Keychain Talk"
Amber Preston and Mary Mack "Pie People Need To Chill Out"
"Even THEY Look Good In That Shirt"
Patreon Teaser!
"Even Walmart Shops At Amazon"
Mike Cummings - "What Time Do The Kids Come Out?"
Jen Murphy and Christina Walkinshaw "Cav'n Off"
Ahmed Bharoocha - "I Know How You Feel, I've Moved"
"Two Different Caliber Teams"
Ryan Niemiller - "I Didn't Realize You Were Playing On Hard"
Kristin Key - "You Know Who Crochets? Vanna White"
"Who Is Bill Strawberry?!"
"My Balls Aren't Plugged In to Anything"
Marianne Sierk "Mom Always Said I Was Too Slow"
Dave Yates "I Sold 2 Cases Of Hot Sauce At My Dad's Memorial"
Scott Beehner - "I Think We're Frightening Andrew"
"Just A Bunch Of Johnny Beehners"
Bo Johnson - "Do You Want His Hands In Your Mouth?"
Irene Tu - "Modern Backpacks Have Too Many Pockets"
Tom and Steph Clark - "When The Cat's Away The Mouse Will Play"
Jason Russell - "I Think I Should Stop Sending My Balls To Johnny"
Tommy Ryman - "Alexa, Play Hardcore Pornography At A High Volume"
Greg Warren - "Just Put Em With The Bronzies"
"Shout Out To Amber"
Jill Kimmel - "My Heart Sucks Ass"
"I'm Not Here For The Sports, I'm Here For The Clips"
Brandt Tobler - "Two Months Free Of My Girlfriend's OnlyFans"
Christina Walkinshaw and Jen Murphy "The Jillvary!"
"Door-To-Door No Soliciting Sign Salesman"
Tyler Boeh - "Is Sweet Still Dope?"
Erin Beehner and Heidi Hayward - "There's Nowhere You Can Take A Hoveround That You Couldn't Take A Wheelchair"
"The Moment Has Passed"
"I'm Gonna Sleep With A Full Boner Tonight"
"She's Beautiful, I Love Her, But She's Very Boring"
Kortney Shane Williams - "We're Not On The Traveling Violin Team"
"We're Not In Europe, We're In Here"
"Warm Mr. Pibb"
Pat McGann - "The Trampoline Capital Of The World... Omaha, Nebraska"
Heidi Hayward and Erin Beehner - "You're Gonna Be Just As Sad Either Way"
"The Body Knows When It's Time To Close"
"Come Shoot Free Throws With Mike Hawk"
Heidi Hayward - "All The Books Say There's No Penis Long Enough"
"Governor Polio Says Condoms Are A Hoax"
"How Many Countries Are There?"
"Dandruff Is A Fickle Mistress"
"Without You I'm A Dinghy On The Ocean"
"Have You Been Eating A Lot Of Canned Food?"
"LoJack The Skippy"
"It IS A Hoax"
"The Tupac Shakur of Comedy"
"Is There A Pharmacist On This Plane?"
"Egg Shaped Holes"
"I'll Throw You Out The Window And Run You Over With My Car"
"Isn't A DIva Cup So A Girl Can Stand And Pee?"
"Be An Erin Not A Karen"
"Play Keith Sweat"
"These Boys Swim Trunks Don't Quite Fit"
"I Kinda Wish I Could Be 600 Pounds"
"Captain North America"
"DVD Bonus Features"
"69ing Yakov Smirnoff"
"She Has My Upper Lip!"
"Gravity Puts It All In My Mouth"
"Ask Me About My S*&#hole"
"Science has proven... it's not good"