15: Why Couples Should Pray Together

Why Couples Should Pray Together

Thanks for joining us again on the Love How Deep Podcast. 

In the hustle and bustle of daily life, maintaining a deep connection with your partner can sometimes be challenging. Today we will explore extraordinary impact that shared prayer can have on marriages. From fostering emotional intimacy to navigating challenges hand-in-hand, prayer serves as a powerful tool for couples to deepen their connection, align their values, and find resilience in the face of life's trials. Join us on this journey as we discuss not only the reasons why couples should pray together but also provide practical insights on how this sacred practice can truly transform the fabric of a marriage.

 

1.        What is Prayer?

Prayer is simply an intimate time of connecting with God, sometimes in private and sometimes with others. 

Jesus said, When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men … but when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your father who is unseen." Matt 6:5-8 NIV

So really your heart and attitude are the most important parts of praying.  Is it sincere, is the main desire to connect with God?

No need to show off or use big words.  On the other hand, we also don't want to focus so much on feeling judged by others that we don't do what is pleasing to God. 

 

2.       The Power of Prayer

This is best summed up in 1 John and we love what the Message version says:  "And how bold and free we then become in his presence, freely asking according to his will, sure that he's listening. And if we're confident that he's listening, we know that what we've asked for is as good as ours.  1 John 5:14-15 NIV

What this means is that if we are bold and pray in alignment with what he wants for us, then he will give us what we ask for.  We all know this is tricky because sometimes we pray and are "sure" that this would be something that God wants, but it doesn't end up working out that way.  Ultimately God's ways are higher than ours and we must trust that he does have our best interest at heart. 

3.       Benefits of Praying Together

 

a.       Emotional Intimacy and Vunerability - Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12 NIV

 

b.       Shared Values, Goals, and Spiritual Connection – When you pray together as a married couple and are genuinely aligned it means that God will ensure you both have a straight path with which to walk together.  "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Prov 3:5-6 NIV

 

c.       Resilience with Trials – When you bring God into the equation, especially when you both as a couple are united, "I can do all this through him who gives me strength." Phil 4:13 NIV

We once heard that the divorce rate for couples that regularly pray with and for each other is 1 in 1,154.  As we all know average divorce rate is usually something like 1 in 2.  So that benefit alone should tell you something about how important this is. 

4.       Practical Tips for Praying Together

 

a.       Find a Time that Works Well for Both Of You

b.      Discuss What You Would Like to Pray About

                                                               i.      Communing with God

                                                             ii.      Thanking God

                                                           iii.      Our Needs

                                                           iv.      Forgive us as we forgive others

                                                             v.      Protection from the Satan

                                                           vi.      Pray for Others

                                                          vii.      Pray for Each Other

                                                        viii.      Prayer for your Desires (ask God if they align with his will). 

                                                            ix.      All of the Above

 

c.       Find a Place that Works Well – decide if you want to sit or need space to walk around

d.       Give Grace to Each Other – i.e. – one of you struggles to pray or you both are tired after a long day.  But we like to say don't let obstacles become excuses. 

Make sure to read the Lord's Prayer for Guidance: 

"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.  And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

This, then, is how you should pray:

Our Father in heaven,

hallowed be your name,

your kingdom come,

your will be done,

on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us today our daily bread.

And forgive us our debts,

as we also have forgiven our debtors.

And lead us not into temptation,

but deliver us from the evil one.

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

Matthew 6:5-15 (NIV)

5.       Call to Action

Put together a plan of action for the next week.  Make a commitment to pray together at least once a day.  Decide on the following: 

a.       Where You Will Pray

b.       What Time You Will Pray

c.       How Long Will You Pray (be flexible as you pray you may find you end earlier or go longer)

d.       What Will You Pray About. 

We can't wait to hear what comes from this journey you are committing to together. 

 

6.       Free 21 Days of Gratitude Journal

Speaking of habits, check out our free resource that can help you both think and mediate more on what you are thankful for.  Lots of research suggests when we focus on what we are thankful for, it changes things for the better.  We feel better, think more clearly, and can do our part to have deeper connections with people and God. 

Click on this link to get the journal and to subscribe to our newsletter:  21 Days of Gratitude Journal

Closing:  Thanks so much as always for listening.  See you next time.