31. Why Don't Other Relatives Help?

It's bad enough to be estranged from your adult child, but when other relatives stand by and watch without attempting to help, you feel twice burned. Once by the rejection, and again by the abandonment of passive family members.

Why do people who supposedly care about you continue to communicate with an estranged adult child who's breaking your heart?

Why do they insist on posting pictures of your child on their social media pages, where they know you can see them?

Why do they favor the child with their friendship, instead of standing in solidarity with you?

These are good questions, and they do have answers. For the most part, relatives are not out to hurt you with these types of behaviors.

There's also some evidence that family members are more uncomfortable than you may realize about being "caught in the middle" (see the link below to a recent study).

In this episode, Tina provides insight into this excruciating situation, along with advice on what to do if you have one or more relatives who are still in contact with your estranged adult child, but don't appear to be doing anything to help end the estrangement.

Research paper --Taking Sides and Feeling Caught (2019):

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/337165996_Taking_sides_and_feeling_caught_Communicative_complications_for_immediate_family_members_of_estranged_parent-child_dyads

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