This Working Mom and Stay-At-Home Dad Flipped The Script on Parenting | Amy and Chris Winther (Parents of 3, Square, Stay-at-home Dad)

from Startup Dad · host Adam Fishman

Amy Winther is the Head of Product Design for Core Products at Square and the writer behind Motherboard, a Substack sharing honest stories about senior women in big tech. Chris Winther is a former financial planner turned stay-at-home dad and the primary parent for their three kids.They’ve built a family setup that flips the traditional script. Amy’s the full-time working parent and Chris runs the home. And what’s wild is how fast it came together. One brutal childcare moment, their third nanny situation falling apart, and they made the call in basically an hour. We discussed:Childcare chaos that forced a fast decision: The nanny and scheduling breaking point that made them change their whole setup in basically an hour.Flipping the traditional script: Why Amy stayed in her career and Chris became the primary parent, and what surprised them about how it felt in real life.Money, power, and partnership: How “what’s mine is yours” removed tension early, and how they split ownership across work and home without resentment.Being the only dad in kid spaces: The awkwardness at playgrounds and playdates, the “creepy guy” fear, and how Chris found his footing and community.Schools and doctors calling mom first: The practical playbook for getting institutions to recognize the primary parent, even when defaults are outdated.Their annual family meeting system: The repeatable way they plan goals, calendars, health, and money so life doesn’t just “happen” to them.Where to find Amy WintherLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amywinther/IG: https://www.instagram.com/winnie_gram/Where to find Chris Wintherhttps://www.instagram.com/cdubbonline/Where to find Adam FishmanFishmanAF Newsletter: www.FishmanAFNewsletter.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamjfishman/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/startupdadpod/ X: https://x.com/fishmanafIn this episode, we cover:(00:00) Welcome Amy Winther, Head of Product Design at Square, and Chris Winther, Stay-At-Home Dad(03:21) The childcare breaking point that flipped their roles(08:49) Why Amy thought she’d be the one to stay home(12:00) Chris on the identity shift from career to primary parent(13:29) Money and power dynamics and why shared finances matter(16:38) Stay-at-home dad social life and finding your people(21:06) The assumptions, the mental load, and the stuff no one says out loud(27:22) Rewiring the default mom call at schools and doctors(29:26) Time is the real budget and how they protect it(32:58) The annual family planning meeting that keeps them aligned(38:43) Working backwards from the life they actually want(40:08) Renovation bootcamp year while raising kids(43:38) You and me versus the baby mindset(45:13) Advice for couples considering a role swap(55:09) Lightning round: SlumberPod wins, dishwasher rules, and the minivan debateResources From This Episode:Square: http://squareup.com/ Mother Board: https://amywinther.substack.com/p/welcome-to-mother-boardv0.app: https://v0.app/ SlumberPod: https://www.slumberpod.com/ Cocomelon (TV Show): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt12427840/ Paw Patrol (TV Show): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3121722/ Paddington (Film): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1109624/ Jurassic Park (Film): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107290/ Toy Story (Film): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107290/ VW ID. Buzz (Minivan): https://www.vw.com/en/models/id-buzz.html —Support Startup DadFor sponsorship inquiries, email: [email protected] Startup Dad Merch: www.startupdadshop.com

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