A Crappy Catholic with Mark Kwasny

Send us Fan MailIt started with a toaster.A simple, innocent appliance whose only job used to be: bread goes in, toast comes out.But not anymore.In this episode, I spiral (gracefully… mostly) into the modern insanity of “smart” everything. What used to require one button now demands decisions, settings, updates, and—at one point—reading the manual… for a toaster. A toaster.From there, things only get worse.We take a walk down memory lane to a time when: TVs had knobs instead of software updates  Cars didn’t beep, blink, and emotionally judge your driving  Phones stayed in one place and didn’t double as a space shuttle control panel  Computers didn’t collapse into useless bricks the second Wi-Fi sneezed Somewhere along the way, simple became complicated… and “advanced” started feeling a lot like “annoying.”This episode is a humorous rant about modern technology, everyday frustration, and the quiet suspicion that maybe… just maybe… we’ve made everything way harder than it needs to be.Also: If the power ever goes out, we’re all standing around like confused squirrels.Enjoy.Support the show

Send us Fan MailWe moved to the country chasing the dream: land, peace, maybe a few chickens… and possibly a holy, wholesome life.What we got instead? Heat exhaustion, ER visits, falling off ladders, tractor accidents, lawsuits, dead chickens, and a strong suspicion that the property itself is cursed.In this episode of Diary of a Crappy Catholic, I share what really happens when a suburban guy tries to become a homesteader in the Carolina heat… while juggling family struggles, unexpected chaos, and the slow realization that maybe—just maybe—this wasn’t my spiritual calling.Turns out, the “simple life” isn’t simple. It’s just… louder.Support the show

Send us Fan MailIn this episode, I unpack how we casually ghost God while insisting we love Him — and why we’d never tolerate that behavior from a spouse, friend, or child.Topics include:• Treating God like the nerd in every 80s movie• Sunday shopping theology• Advent guilt• Why effort matters even when you’re bad at Catholicism• And how being a crappy Catholic still means actually tryingSpoiler: God understands… but that doesn’t mean we should stop caring.Support the show

Send us Fan MailWhy is it that the guy at the football stadium will take his shirt off, paint his chest, scream like a lunatic for four hours… but we Catholics can barely stay awake for a 55-minute Mass where JESUS CHRIST is literally present?Yeah. I’m calling us out. And I’m calling myself out. Because for years I treated Catholicism like a spiritual DMV appointment—get in, get my hour, get out.In this video, I dive into: 🏈 Why sports fans have more zeal than most Catholics 📚 How decades of awful catechesis left many of us lukewarm 😬 Why so many of us grew up in Catholic homes that barely acted Catholic 🔥 Why knowing the faith is the ONLY way to fall in love with it 😑 How modern Catholic leadership often seems embarrassed to be… Catholic 💥 And why maybe God is calling ordinary “crappy Catholics” like us to actually become the heroes we wish we hadIf you’ve ever wondered why being Catholic sometimes feels like a chore… or why you’re not “on fire” the way the saints were… this one’s for you.No guilt trips. No theologian-speak. Just a fellow Crappy Catholic trying to figure out how not to be so… crappy.Support the show

Send us Fan Mail"Jesus, I trust in You." Okay, you said the words... but do you trust in Him, really? Yeah, a lot of us are like that. We say we have confidence in God. We say we trust in Jesus, but get stuck in a traffic jam just once and the only thing you're trusting is that you can cuss up a blue streak at all the idiot drivers. Trusting God... having confidence in God... surrendering in God. It all sounds good until the rubber hits the road, life gets rough, and nothing is working out the way you want it to. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak...Support the show

Send us Fan Mail🎄🔥 LET THE ADVENT WARS BEGIN! 🔥🎄Welcome to the ONLY Christmas-prep video brave enough to admit what the rest of the world won’t: Advent is basically a four-week battle campaign—and you are terribly outnumbered.In this episode, I heroically attempt to celebrate Advent while dodging:Rogue Christmas decorations that attack before Thanksgiving is even overPeople who think Advent is just “Christmas Lite”Grocery stores already playing Mariah Carey at full blastThat one coworker who won’t stop bragging about finishing Christmas shopping in JulyMy own internal chaos, which is frankly the most aggressive enemy combatantYou’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll probably wonder why I’m allowed near a camera unsupervised.But most importantly, you’ll discover:Advent isn’t about winning the war… it’s about surviving it with your faith and your sanity still attached.🔥 Light a candle.⚔️ Brace for impact.🎄 And let the Advent Wars begin.#AdventWars #CrappyCatholic #HolidayChaos #SurvivingAdvent #TooEarlyForChristmas #LetTheSeasonBeginSupport the show

Send us Fan MailEver feel like prayer is this super serious, complicated thing where you have to say all the right words? Nope! Prayer is basically chatting with your BFF — except your BFF is God, and He already knows your life story (awkward texts and all). Think of it like keeping the ultimate group chat alive: say thanks, ask for help, admit when you messed up, or just tell Him about your day. No fancy apps, no bad Wi-Fi, and you never get left on read. A funny but honest look at talking to God in a noisy world.Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver wonder what it really takes to be a decent human? Spoiler: it’s not about winning every argument, getting likes, or even being perfect.In this video, we explore what it means to be a person of good will—someone who seeks truth, admits mistakes, and tries to do the right thing even when it’s messy, inconvenient, or downright frustrating.Think of it like this: Charlie Brown was struggling to put on a Christmas play, the angels had some wisdom, and Linus delivered the ultimate life lesson—peace comes to those who honestly try to be good, even when it’s hard.Watch, laugh, and maybe learn a little about honesty, humility, and what it really means to live with integrity in a world full of shortcuts.Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver wonder if being Catholic is actually worth all the rules, guilt, and weird traditions? Yeah… me too. But here’s the thing—being Catholic literally saved my life. I’ve hit rock bottom, stared into the abyss, and somehow (thank God and my probably very confused guardian angel) made it out alive.In this episode, I share my messy, very human journey: why the Church’s teachings actually make life a little simpler, how the sacraments and saints are basically your spiritual hype squad, and why sticking with Catholicism—even when it’s hard—can give your life purpose, direction, and maybe a little hope.Spoiler: I’m still crappy at it. But that’s okay—because faith isn’t about being perfect, it’s about showing up, fumbling through, and trying to get it right.Support the show

Send us Fan MailHey — welcome to Crappy Catholic Reboot! In this short talk I share how I grew up Catholic but didn’t really know much about it until I started reading and asking questions. I explain how learning more about the Bible, saints, angels, and the church helped me believe again and get excited about my faith.What you’ll hear: • How I felt when friends said mean things about the Catholic Church. • Why reading and learning made me want to stay Catholic. • Why faith can be like finding someone you want to spend your life with — it feels good, steady, and full of surprises. • Why it’s okay to make mistakes and keep trying every day.If you’re curious about faith or just want to hear an honest story, stick around — we’ll learn and laugh together. Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver feel like you're surrounded by dumb ideas... and somehow following along? Yeah, me too. This video dives into 10 hilariously painful ways we all conform to stupidity—without even realizing it. From trying to be liked by people who don’t like themselves, to calling your job a “family” (spoiler: they’ll still fire you via email), this is your invitation to stop the nonsense and embrace your wonderfully non-conforming self.Perfect for: ✅ Recovering people-pleasers ✅ Black sheep from dysfunctional families ✅ Catholics who feel like “crappy” ones ✅ Anyone who’s ever said “I’m basically a good person” (and meant it)Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver feel like you’re the only one who remembers what actually happened at Thanksgiving '98? You’re not crazy, you’re just surrounded by people who prefer their truth pre-sanitized and gift-wrapped. In this episode, we take a stroll through family image management, workplace gaslighting, and the fine art of being the inconvenient truth-teller. Warning: May cause spontaneous laughter, uncomfortable self-awareness, and a sudden urge to yell, “I knew it wasn’t just me!”Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver feel like your childhood came with a free subscription to self-doubt and procrastination? Join me as I battle the fear of recording and discover that maybe, just maybe, it's not all my fault—except the part where I keep overthinking everything.Support the show

Send us Fan MailTired of Popes trying to be the “cool dad”? In this episode, I rant (lovingly) about why the Church needs a coach, not a cruise director.Support the show

Send us Fan MailThe world wants you to think that YOU'RE the crazy one when truth is, the insane asylums have been opened and the crazy people are in charge and are all around you! It's time to pick a course and tell the world to take a hike. Here's how we're going to do it together. Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver feel like being Catholic is like running on a treadmill... that’s also on fire... and moving backward? Don’t worry, you’re not alone—let’s talk about why the struggle is real (and maybe laugh about it so we don’t cry).Support the show

Send us Fan MailAre you afraid of failure, success, or just recording a podcast about fear? I'd be lying if I said this recording was easy because fear kept telling me different. But I found a great way to give a swift kick to fear. Here's some help when fear has you stuck.Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver looked at an old photo of yourself and thought, "Wow, I peaked at 5"? Join me as I try to rediscover that kid who smiled in bathtubs, rocked a xylophone, and didn’t care what anyone thought—except maybe for snack time.Support the show

Send us Fan MailBelieve it or not, there's a little you inside of you. And if that little guy or gal never had a chance to be a kid, to be creative, or to just grow up in a normal household, then it's time for you to take the reigns. Discover how to re-parent that adorable, passionate, little child who has amazing potential and so much life to live with joy. You can even get started today.Support the show

Send us Fan MailFeeling like the voices in your head could start their own terrorist organization? Don’t let the terrorists win! Here's how to fight back against the voices and self-talk that are trying to keep you down. Support the show

Send us Fan MailEver feel like you're surrounded by people who think *you're* the stupid one? Let’s talk about dodging silly ideas, finding your self-worth, and why everyone needs a Chart of Stupidity -- it will come in handy!Support the show

Send us Fan MailHow much of your life have you spent trying to please other people and get approval... especially from your parents? Well, you can do a lot of things to get approval like draw a pretty picture or do your chores without complaining or just sit in your room quietly while your siblings make a ruckus. Just don't make the same mistake I did that cost me 10 years of my life.Support the show

Send us Fan MailFor so many of us, expressing our feelings and emotions was not an option. We were told to "Stop crying" or "What are you so happy about?" When we needed to tell someone how we felt -- especially someone in our dysfunctional family -- we were met with blank stares, condescending looks, or incredibly fast changes of subject. But God is the author of your feelings and emotions. He gave them to you as a gift to be felt, used, and expressed. If you're not used to feeling feelings or emotions, it's not too late. You can take the first step right not to healing and feeling your emotions. Support the show

Send us Fan MailEveryone tells you to change, but sometimes they want you to change to make them comfortable, not because it's good for you. If you come from a family or place where people didn't let you be yourself, it can feel like you're always trying to make everyone else happy. But guess what? You don't have to do that! God made you for a special purpose, and your job is to figure out what that is and live it out. It’s not your responsibility to fix how other people feel—only they can do that. Focus on being the best version of yourself for God, even if others don’t understand. You’re not alone; lots of people struggle with this, but it’s worth it to be who you were created to be.Support the show

Send us Fan MailIf you grew up as the co-dependent or the lost sheep in a dysfunctional Catholic family, chances are, you hungered for attention. You would do anything you could to be noticed and accepted. But guess what? No matter what you did -- or do! -- it still isn't working. So here's how you escape the bucket...Support the show

Send us Fan MailAs a Catholic, you're supposed to be happy and joyful, right? Well, if you have a melancholic temperament or if you're from a dysfunctional family, sadness and discouragement can hit you like a brick out of nowhere. But relief is on the way! Here are some ways you can battle sadness, discouragement, depression, and even the devil himself.Check out the book, Consoling Thoughts of St. Francis de Sales on Amazon.Support the show

Send us Fan MailDo you believe God loves you? Really loves you, just the way you are? Sometimes, it’s hard to believe, especially if you grew up in a family where love wasn’t talked about much. Support the show

Send us Fan MailAre you feeling stressed out about making Christmas 'Hallmark Perfect'? Do you dread putting on the happy face around family and friends when you would rather go hide under a tree? Here's what I did to make Christmas peaceful, joyful, and stress-free.Support the show

Send us Fan MailWhy be Catholic in today’s world? We've got sinners and saints, martyrs and incorruptibles. Oh yeah... we got Jesus!Support the show

Send us Fan MailToday I talk about why believing in God makes life better and why atheism, or not believing in God, doesn’t make sense... at all. And hey, just my opinion, but I give 10 reasons why I think atheism is kinda sorta stupid.Support the show

Send us Fan MailBeing a 'basically good Catholic' isn't enough (besides... it's pretty boring)! Saying you're "basically good" can mean that you're only doing the minimum and not really trying to be the best you can be. How about challenging yourself to aim to be a great person, not just a "basically good" person, because actions speak louder than words. Want to know where to begin? Stick around for the answer.Support the show

Send us Fan MailIn this episode of Diary of a Crappy Catholic, Mark shares his journey of discovering what it means to be Catholic and the importance of truly understanding his faith. Growing up Catholic, Mark didn't feel very connected to his beliefs, partly because his family didn’t openly talk about faith. Like many Catholics, he completed religious milestones, such as Baptism, First Holy Communion, and Confirmation, without feeling deeply connected.As he grew older, Mark realized he didn’t fully understand his faith, especially when others challenged him with negative views about the Catholic Church. This pushed him to start learning about Catholicism on his own. Mark began reading books and studying the Bible, which helped him grow more confident and excited about being Catholic. He encourages others to explore their own beliefs, asking questions and learning more, especially in a world that can be confusing and negative.Mark wants his listeners to feel proud to be Catholic, likening it to being on a professional sports team. He hopes his journey will inspire others to appreciate their faith and look forward to a hopeful, meaningful future.Support the show

Send us Fan MailIn the first episode of the "Diary of a Crappy Catholic" podcast, Mark talks about his experience as a Catholic who feels like he's not perfect at it. He wants to create a space where people can join him in exploring their faith, even if they struggle. Mark believes that being Catholic is about knowing, loving, and serving God, and he hopes to help others find purpose in life. He wants listeners to understand what it means to be part of the Catholic faith, just like being on a sports team with specific rules. Mark invites everyone, whether Catholic or not, to come along on this journey together and to be nice in the comments.Support the show