The Origins Of Loving Us

Last bit.Part 3#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterrChanbepoddin.com@therealwillrayTwitter@willraycomedy TT/IG 

Still At it.Part 2#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG 

Do I even want to feel feelings again? Right now? At all?Too many ppl become okay masking “ I’m okay” or “ I’m over it”… if you aren’t… okay. if is okay to feel ya feelings, because if not now when? When are you gonna address what you need to come to terms with?How did you come up with this?Hurting peopleGetting hurt & feeling how others have feltGetting sick of myself Having a daughterRealizing that men don’t have “safe spaces” to heal... My best was reserved and locked tf away. PRESERVES!!!!What did we realize? The Inner Fight: Do I even wanna get better just to try this bs again?Will I know when to pull out faster next time!?! Short answer no. Long answer: ain’t no short cuts in real bonding with ppl. Either you try or you die never knowing. #theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG 

Part 2:Once a person spent months - years learning how to please you… it becomes addicting. You may have the same friends, or be around each others family... you might need to not show up to certain events if they are there. You cant think about doing anyone else, cuddling up with anyone else or going out to eat with anyone else. A lot of times how you bypass the fact that yall broken up is selfishly thinking about how good this orgasim might feel.... Guess what? you are now soul tied to a person who is not healthy for you and who you want to become...What did we realize? The Inner Fight: Do not mix up kindness, understanding and good intentions with they want me back !!!Is it high effort?Do they try to get physical with you in a more than friends way?Do they contact you after hours on purpose, or demand your attention when they know you are working?Did they tell you straight up, I want to be with you, im doing xyzzy, I love you and im going to put in the effort to show you?Are they avoiding seeing other people and ask if you are dating or not?#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG If you would like to support this podcast, donate to our link https://app.redcircle.com/shows/3e852ec9-cc6d-4949-ad4d-0ce094c0bc58/donations

We back, Spring has Sprung. Hope yall good.—————————————————Once a person spent months - years learning how to please you… it becomes addicting. You may have the same friends, or be around each others family... you might need to not show up to certain events if they are there. You cant think about doing anyone else, cuddling up with anyone else or going out to eat with anyone else. A lot of times how you bypass the fact that yall broken up is selfishly thinking about how good this orgasim might feel.... Guess what? you are now soul tied to a person who is not healthy for you and who you want to become.-Reasons Why Dick Never Solves the issue? How does your Aint Shitness Work To your advantage? What does that do to the psyche?#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG If you would like to support this podcast, donate to our link https://app.redcircle.com/shows/3e852ec9-cc6d-4949-ad4d-0ce094c0bc58/donations

Part 2 continued of Ep 4:Last ep you spoke on something: selflessness and selfishness… a lot of people confuse them… but we need both for balance. Can you explain what you meant? Also, what are 5 selfless acts men can do while being selfish in a healthy way-How can we handle that guilt in a healthy way?Realize when you are craving what you’re used to vs what you need to craveJournal your feelings before you text them or callA lot of people don’t mention this… pray your urge awayWhat did we realize?The Inner Fight: Is this fixable? Pride and ego can block what’s fixable.Am I looking for perfection or do I deserve to move forward?I’m never looking for what’s perfect, just reciprocating effortWe have to make sure we don’t confuse love with saturated entitlement mixed with who we know. That who we already know mindset will keep you stuck in positions with ppl who do not deserve you or who will never provide the appreciation your efforts deserve. I never want a man to think just because I love you I won’t save me. If you love yourself you will self preserve too.#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG If you would like to support this podcast, donate to our link https://app.redcircle.com/shows/3e852ec9-cc6d-4949-ad4d-0ce094c0bc58/donations

Last ep you spoke on something: selflessness and selfishness… a lot of people confuse them… but we need both for balance. Can you explain what you meant? Also, what are 5 selfless acts men can do while being selfish in a healthy way-Mid march updates in lifespring weather, brighter days and finally a reason to be outsideThe people are really living the pod, yall can drop a review and even donate to the show. Let us know if you would like the show weekly or every two weeks too. Also, are their topics yall feel like after a breakup no one speaks on?Having something or someone you once enjoyed, shared moments with… then not having them… Prepare to experience withdrawal… it’s a different kinda drug. Just because you are broken up doesn’t mean the feelings instantly go away, doesn’t erase good times you had with them either. No one died, but the idea you had with you and them may have…That’s where that guilt comes in at…What makes you feel guilty for loving them?Reasons You may feel guilty for loving a person?“why do I feel like this?”“wtf is wrong with me?”“what do I do now that I deal with just myself & my feelings by myself?”“i anticipated the pain but i didn’t know it was gonna hurt LIKE THIS”“i wish we could go back 6 months & fix this”“i hurt & abandoned my person”“i failed”How can we handle that guilt in a healthy way?Realize when you are craving what you’re used to vs what you need to craveJournal your feelings before you text them or callA lot of people don’t mention this… pray your urge awayWhat did we realize?The Inner Fight: Is this fixable? Pride and ego can block what’s fixable.Am I looking for perfection or do I deserve to move forward?I’m never looking for what’s perfect, just reciprocating effortWe have to make sure we don’t confuse love with saturated entitlement mixed with who we know. That who we already know mindset will keep you stuck in positions with ppl who do not deserve you or who will never provide the appreciation your efforts deserve. I never want a man to think just because I love you I won’t save me. If you love yourself you will self preserve too.#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG If you would like to support this podcast, donate to our link https://app.redcircle.com/shows/3e852ec9-cc6d-4949-ad4d-0ce094c0bc58/donations

...We're glad We don’t hate them, We just wish we didn’t love them.. It be like that sometimes. Pt 2The Show Run Down:-why do people still care after the breakup? How do we fight those feelings in a healthy way?  Steps to create space away from your exWhat needs to be said?What did we realize?The Inner Fight: Is this truly the last fight or argument? Are we really done?Rules of engagement when dating again?Whats Next? Tell them the next topic…“what did this episode teach you?”#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup  #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG 

...We're glad We don’t hate them, We just wish we didn’t love them.. It be like that sometimes.The Show Run Down:Catch Up: recap of previous episode to lead into present episode’s topicWe discussed black history month, valentines day, etc, Chan had to vent real quick…It was a lot of Ain’t Ish activity for the V Day.—————————————————What do we do with old feelings? Should we check in? Did you block them, if so why? -why do people still care after the breakup? How do we fight those feelings in a healthy way?  Steps to create space away from your exWhat needs to be said?What did we realize?The Inner Fight: Is this truly the last fight or argument? Are we really done?Rules of engagement when dating again?Whats Next? Tell them the next topic…“what did this episode teach you?”#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup  #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG 

Part 2: I Don’t Have Time To Be Heartbroken  Last ep: how did we get here, the introduction of us and what we discussed Catch up: What new with us?We are really grieving what we thought in our minds…Maybe figuring out myself is what I need…Which L was it?!? Lust, Love or Loss Story time: Do you really love fully twice?Whats Next? Tell them the next topic… short snippet of it and stop…#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#oolu @chanbepoddin IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy /IG 

I Don’t Have Time To Be Heartbroken  Last ep: how did we get here, the introduction of us and what we discussed Catch up: What new with us?What does it feel like to be heart broken?How do you push through when you feel like shit?Do I want to open up about what I’m scared about?Do I want to be good to someone new? Am I over my get back stage?We are really grieving what we thought in our minds…Maybe figuring out myself is what I need…Which L was it?!? Lust, Love or Loss Story time: Do you really love fully twice?Whats Next? Tell them the next topic… short snippet of it and stop…#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#oolu @chanbepoddin IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy /IG 

“Why did we create this podcast? What’s our objective?”What needs to be said:What did we realize?Every break up aint a lossGET THE LESSON AND MOVE ON Story time: 1 of the worst/best breakups of my life (explain this but Chan has to explain why she’s never had a “bad” break up)Who’s fault is this? Was it theirs? Was it yours? Was it ours? What did we learn?Alone vs. Lonely.1. What’s the difference?2. Do you like yourself when you’re “alone”? (let’s start there)3. Things that can happen when you get “lonely”The Inner Fight: From sex whenever I wanted to no sex at all ; Call or don’t call; healthy/safe space vs losing a friendship Whats Next? Tell them the next topic...#theoriginsoflovingus#afterthebreakup #nocontact#toolu @chanbepoddin /IG/ TwitterChanbepoddin.com@therealwillray Twitter@willraycomedy TT/IG 

Join Will Ray and Co Host Chantal, as they get real about the aftermath of relationship breakups. By using raw honesty, they share their experiences and opinions on: healing, accountability and vulnerability. They’ll take deep dives into the complexities of concepts like black love, self love, emotional growth, discernment, conflict management, helpful communication and more.They blend personal stories with wisdom and comedy, so this podcast offers practical advice and heartfelt insights to help you work through the ups and downs of your next relationship. Nothing is off limits!! Just candid conversations to inspire growth, connection, and understanding.Everyone experiences break ups but it doesn’t have to be nasty or toxic. We can navigate through these awkward feelings and situations like adults. Together. Our community used to thrive off of love & now, it seems like nobody believes in it anymore. Can Will & Chan help get us back on track? Tune in to find outhttps://www.bonfire.com/store/the-chanbepoddin-spot/~~~Follow us for more information:IG : @willraycomedy @chanbepoddin Visit chanbepoddin.com