Trial & Error & Error Podcast

In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, LJ and Ale unpack the truth behind open relationships and consensual non-monogamy. From definitions and common relationship styles to what the research says about satisfaction, jealousy, stigma, and mental health, they lay out the potential benefits and real risks so listeners can decide what fits their values. In this episode, we cover: 💬 What an open relationship is (and what it is not) 🧩 Different types of consensual non-monogamy: swinging, polyamory, open relationships, and relationship anarchy 📊 What research says about relationship satisfaction and sexual satisfaction 🧠 Why jealousy still shows up, and how some couples manage it ⚠️ Common risks: unequal desire, boundary violations, and communication breakdowns 🧭 When opening a relationship might help, and when it can backfire 🛠️ A science-based approach to opening a relationship with clear boundaries and check-ins ✨ Listener takeaway: Open relationships are not a shortcut to fixing problems. They tend to amplify whatever is already present, so success depends on honesty, trust, and ongoing communication. 📚 REFERENCES (ACADEMIC & MEDIA) Rubel, A. N., & Bogaert, A. F. (2016). Consensual nonmonogamy: Psychological well-being and relationship quality. Journal of Sex Research. Conley, T. D., et al. (2013). A critical examination of popular assumptions about the benefits and outcomes of monogamous relationships. Personality and Social Psychology Review. Moors, A. C., et al. (2017). Stigma toward consensual non-monogamy. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. Sheff, E. (2014). The Polyamorists Next Door. Haupert, M. L., et al. (2017). Prevalence of experiences with consensual nonmonogamous relationships. Archives of Sexual Behavior. Podcast: Multiamory Podcast (relationship science & CNM communication) Podcast: Esther Perel’s Where Should We Begin? YouTube: Talks by relationship therapist Esther Perel on modern intimacy

Wedding planning looks dreamy on Pinterest, but in real life it is a mix of excitement, big decisions, and a few “wait… how much?!” moments 😅💍 In this episode, LJ shares her real-time wedding update: what the engagement was like, how couples can set expectations together, and the budgeting reality check that hits fast 💸. From choosing a venue 🏛️ and navigating guest list feelings 📋, to finding the right vendors 🎶📸🍰 and adding personal touches like the dress 👗, this is a behind-the-scenes look at what it takes to plan a wedding while keeping the relationship at the center ❤️✨ 🌟 Key Takeaways Get aligned early as a couple so planning feels like teamwork, not tension 🤝❤️ Budget first, dream second because wedding costs add up quickly 💰🧾 The venue drives everything including the date, guest count, and overall vibe 🏛️🗓️ Guest lists are emotional so boundaries and kindness matter 📋🫶 Pick vendors based on priorities since they shape the experience of the day 🎶📸 Expect stress, but protect the joy by building in fun moments along the way ✨🍰 Perfection is optional but love and intention are not 💞

Ever feel like you’re one slightly-too-optimistic to-do list away from spontaneously combusting? Same. In this episode, Ale and LJ take on the philosophy of burnout: why “we work less than ever” can still somehow feel like “I have 37 jobs and they all hate me.” We unpack how modern achievement culture turns us into our own boss, our own employee, and our own extremely judgmental HR department. Expect big thoughts, small jokes, and at least one spiritual attack on hustle culture. 😌🔥 ✅ Key Takeaways Burnout is not just tiredness. It is chronic exhaustion plus cynicism and that creeping “I’m failing at life” feeling. 🫠 Achievement culture hands you the whip. Nobody has to pressure you when your inner critic is working overtime. 🧠⚡ Individualism can make everything transactional. Friends become “networking,” dating becomes a job interview, and vulnerability becomes a risk assessment. 🧍‍♀️📉 Rest becomes suspicious. If your hobby does not monetize itself by Tuesday, capitalism is disappointed in you. 😭🧘 The irony: the “freer” you are to become anything, the less free you feel while chasing an impossible perfect version of yourself. 🪞🏃 🔗 Resources Mentioned in the episode Unsolicited Advice (YouTube) — inspiration for the episode’s philosophical framing Byung-Chul Han — The Burnout Society (key idea: the “achievement society” and self-exploitation) Extra resources for listeners Christina Maslach & Michael P. Leiter — research on burnout (incl. the Maslach Burnout Inventory) World Health Organization (WHO) — “Burn-out” (ICD-11) definition and overview Cal Newport — Slow Productivity (and related talks on sustainable work) Emily & Amelia Nagoski — Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle Johan Hari — Lost Connections (on disconnection, meaning, and well-being)

Couples therapy is not just for relationships on the brink. In this episode, LJ and Ale unpack when to start couples therapy, what research says about timing, and the signs that “we’re fine” might actually mean “we’re stuck.” 💬🧠 You’ll hear about: Early intervention and why it works ✅ The “Four Horsemen” warning signs ⚠️ High-risk transition seasons that can test any relationship 🔁 Different therapy styles, from EFT to the Gottman Method 🧩 How to find a therapist that fits you (not just the internet) 🔍 If you’ve ever wondered whether it’s “bad enough” to go to therapy, this episode is your gentle nudge: you do not have to wait for a disaster to get support. 🫶🏽 🎛️ Editor’s note: The audio quality in this recording is not our best. We’re sorry about that, and we appreciate your patience while we keep improving our setup. 📚 References American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (2015). Consumer Update Survey. Doss, B. D., et al. (2009). The effect of the transition to parenthood on relationship quality. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Gottman, J. M. (1994). Why Marriages Succeed or Fail. Simon & Schuster. Johnson, S. M., et al. (1999). Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy: Status and challenges. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice. Wiebe, S. A., & Johnson, S. M. (2016). A review of the research in Emotionally Focused Therapy. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy. Williamson, H. C., et al. (2016). Timing and effectiveness of couple therapy. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology. Perel, E. (2017). Mating in Captivity. Harper. Gottman Institute research summaries (various publications). Showtime. (2019–2025). Couples Therapy.

In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, Ale and LJ continue on Ale’s quest to become rich with a beginner-friendly introduction to investing in the stock market. You’ll learn: 💸 What to do before you invest (emergency fund, debt, budgeting) 📈 What a stock is, and why investing always involves risk 🧺 Why diversification matters, and how it reduces the chance of losing everything 🧩 What ETFs are, and why many beginners use them to spread risk 🔢 How long-term compounding can turn small, consistent contributions into big outcomes 🧘 Why staying calm during market dips can matter more than picking “the perfect” investment 🎧 Audio note: Sound quality is a bit rough in parts of this episode. Thanks for bearing with us. 🔗 References U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC). “Exchange-Traded Funds (ETFs)”. FINRA. “Exchange-Traded Funds (ETFs)”. Vanguard. “What is an ETF?” Investopedia. “Diversification”. Investopedia. “Compound Interest”. S&P Dow Jones Indices. S&P 500 historical annual returns (long-run averages). Federal Reserve. Survey of Household Economics and Decisionmaking (emergency savings / ability to cover a $400–$1,000 expense). S&P Dow Jones Indices. S&P 500 drawdown during the 2007–2009 financial crisis (peak-to-trough decline and recovery timeline). Nischa Shah. Personal finance guidance on emergency funds (3–6 months of expenses).

This week on Trial & Error & Error, we’re diving into cancel culture: what it actually means, where it came from, and why “accountability” online can sometimes turn into a full-blown pile-on. ⚠️ Trigger warning: This episode includes mention/discussion of rape/sexual violence. Please take care while listening. 🔊 Quick audio note: The sound quality in this episode isn’t the best in parts (sorry!) — thank you for bearing with us. 📅 New episode out Wednesday — listen wherever you get your podcasts 🎙️ 💬 Question of the week: Have you ever deleted an old post out of fear? 😬 🎧 Episode Overview We talk about digital footprints, screenshots being forever, and the very real anxiety of feeling like one old post could resurface and define you. We explore the gray areas: Does time passed matter? Does intent matter? Are apologies ever “enough”? And should different public figures (politicians vs. reality TV stars vs. comedians) be judged by different standards? Plus, we get into the psychology behind ostracism, outrage algorithms, group polarization, and what all of this does to creativity, growth, and the way Gen Z shows up online. 📚 Resources & References Research Articles & Studies: Ng, E. (2020). No grand pronouncements here…: Reflections on cancel culture and digital media participation. Television & New Media, 21(6), 621–627. Clark, M. D. (2020). DRAG THEM: A brief etymology of “cancel culture.” Communication and the Public, 5(3–4), 88–92. Ronson, J. (2015). So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed. Riverhead Books. Williams, K. D. (2007). Ostracism. Annual Review of Psychology, 58, 425–452. Williams, K. D., & Nida, S. A. (2011). Ostracism: Consequences and coping. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 20(2), 71–75. Brady, W. J., Wills, J. A., Jost, J. T., Tucker, J. A., & Van Bavel, J. J. (2017). Emotion shapes the diffusion of moralized content in social networks. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (PNAS), 114(28), 7313–7318. Crockett, M. J. (2017). Moral outrage in the digital age. Nature Human Behaviour, 1, 769–771. Sunstein, C. R. (2002). The law of group polarization. Journal of Political Philosophy, 10(2), 175–195. Myers, D. G., & Lamm, H. (1976). The group polarization phenomenon. Psychological Bulletin, 83(4), 602–627. Edmondson, A. (1999). Psychological safety and learning behavior in work teams. Administrative Science Quarterly, 44(2), 350–383. Haimovitz, K., & Dweck, C. S. (2016). What predicts children’s fixed and growth intelligence mind-sets? Not their parents’ views of intelligence but their parents’ views of failure. Psychological Science, 27(6), 859–869. boyd, d. (2011). Social network sites as networked publics: Affordances, dynamics, and implications. In A Networked Self (pp. 39–58). Routledge. Marwick, A. E., & boyd, d. (2011). I tweet honestly, I tweet passionately: Twitter users, context collapse, and the imagined audience. New Media & Society, 13(1), 114–133. American Psychological Association (2022–2023). Stress in America Reports. Twenge, J. M., Joiner, T. E., Rogers, M. L., & Martin, G. N. (2018). Increases in depressive symptoms, suicide-related outcomes, and suicide rates among U.S. adolescents after 2010. Clinical Psychological Science, 6(1), 3–17. Nesi, J. (2020). The impact of social media on youth mental health. Current Opinion in Psychology, 31, 125–129. Massanari, A. (2017). #Gamergate and The Fappening: How Reddit’s algorithm, governance, and culture support toxic technocultures. New Media & Society, 19(3), 329–346. Gillespie, T. (2018). Custodians of the Internet. Yale University Press. CareerBuilder (2018, 2021). Social Media Screening Studies. Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM). Reports on social media screening in hiring.  

Ever wondered if you should start getting Botox? 💉 In this episode, we dive deep into the world of cosmetic procedures, beauty standards, and the impact of social media on our perception of attractiveness. We explore the science behind "pretty privilege," discuss whether plastic surgery and body positivity can coexist, and share our honest thoughts on cosmetic enhancements. From evolutionary psychology to Instagram filters, we're unpacking why we're all so obsessed with looking good – and whether it's worth going under the knife for. 🦋 Join us for a candid conversation about beauty, self-acceptance, and making choices that are right for YOU (not the algorithm). ✨ 🎧 Episode Overview The Science of Attraction – Why do we find certain features attractive? Evolutionary psychology explains our hardwired preferences Pretty Privilege is Real – Research shows attractive people earn more, get better jobs, and are perceived as more competent Social Media's Impact – How Instagram and TikTok have normalised cosmetic surgery and created unattainable beauty standards Types of Procedures – Understanding the difference between plastic surgery, cosmetic surgery, and choosing the right doctor The Risks – Why we've lost reverence for what is actually a potentially life-threatening operation Personal Reflections – Honest conversation about our own relationship with appearance and cosmetic procedures Making the Right Choice – How to approach cosmetic surgery for the right reasons (hint: not for the 'gram) 📚 Resources & References Research Articles & Studies: Facial attractiveness: evolutionary based research New Study Unveils Career Impact of Attractiveness: Higher Salaries and Prestigious Roles Over Time – 2025 study tracking 43,000 MBA graduates Why Do Good-looking People Get the Job? | SPSP – Research on the self-fulfilling prophecy of attractiveness Podcasts: "Plastic Surgery Uncensored" by Dr. Randy Rahban Important Note: Always verify your surgeon is board-certified, not just "board certified" in another speciality. Do your research Babes 💄

🎙️ Ever wondered why landing a job feels like running a marathon through an obstacle course? In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, we dive deep into the increasingly complicated world of job interviews. From endless interview rounds to AI-powered screening tools, we explore why the hiring process has become so complex — and what the science actually says about it all. Join us as we unpack: ⏰ Why interview processes now stretch far beyond the ideal 21-day timeline 🔄 The explosion of multiple interview stages and what that means for candidates 🔬 What research reveals about structured vs. unstructured interviews ⚖️ How organisations' attempts at fairness sometimes backfire 🤖 The role of AI and technology in making things more complicated (not simpler!) 💬 The human psychology behind interview anxiety and uncertainty Whether you're a job seeker frustrated by the process or an employer trying to hire better, this episode offers eye-opening insights backed by research and real-world examples. 💡 Spoiler alert: The solution isn't more steps — it's smarter structure and clearer communication. 🎧 Subscribe, share, and don't forget to leave us a review! Follow us @tee.podcast on Instagram and send us your hiring horror stories. 📚 Resources & References Academic Research: Smirnov, I., Lemmerich, F., & Strohmaier, M. (2021). Quota-based debiasing can decrease representation of the most under-represented groups. Royal Society Open Science, 8(9), 210821. https://doi.org/10.1098/rsos.210821 News Articles: Smith, R. A. (2025, August 12). AI Is Forcing the Return of the In-Person Job Interview. The Wall Street Journal. https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/careers/ai-job-interview-virtual-in-person-305f9fd0 Additional Sources Mentioned: 2023 Candidate Experience Survey — Austrian Employee Union Meta-analyses on interview validity and structure (general research literature) Research on contrast effects in interviewing Studies on algorithmic fairness tools in hiring

Ever felt weird about your best friend's new partner? Like they've suddenly become a stranger? You're not alone—and science says you're not crazy either. 🧠💕 In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, we dive deep into one of friendship's most taboo topics: hating your bestie's partner. We explore the psychology behind why this happens, from friendship displacement theory to the neuroscience of love-induced bias. Spoiler alert: your gut feelings might be more accurate than you think. 👀 We break down research on relational identity changes, discuss why friends can spot red flags that love makes invisible, and share honest (and hilarious) data from our group chat questionnaire. Plus, we tackle the big question: should you ever say something? And what happens when you're vindicated after the breakup? 🎭 Whether you've been there, you're there now, or you're just curious about the science of friendship and romance, this episode will make you feel seen, validated, and maybe a little less alone in your brunch-time suffering. 😅   📋 Episode Overview 🔬 The Science of Friendship Displacement – Why romantic relationships can feel like they're "stealing" your friend 🧠 Love Makes You Blind (Literally) – How dopamine and oxytocin reduce critical judgment in romantic partners 👁️ Red Flag Detection – Why friends have clearer vision than people in love 💭 Three Reasons You Might Dislike Their Partner – Personality changes, protective instincts, and interpersonal incompatibility 📊 Group Chat Confessions – Real data on whether people speak up, stay silent, or accidentally sabotage 🗣️ Should You Say Something? – When intervention helps vs. when it backfires (reactance theory explained) ✅ The "I Told You So" Dilemma – What to do when you're vindicated after the breakup 💡 Final Takeaway – How to navigate these feelings without destroying your friendship 🔗 Resources & References 📚 Academic Research Gershenfeld, J., & Witteman, H. (1996). Romantic relationships and friendships. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 13(4), 519–541. Sprecher, S., & Felmlee, D. (2000). Romantic partners' perceptions of social network interference. Personal Relationships, 7(4), 309–329. Cross, S. E., Bacon, P. L., & Morris, M. L. (2000). The relational-interdependent self-construal. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78(4), 791–808. Rusbult, C. E., & Van Lange, P. A. M. (2003). Interdependence, interaction, and relationships. Annual Review of Psychology, 54, 351–375. Fisher, H. E., Aron, A., & Brown, L. L. (2006). Romantic love: A mammalian brain system for mate choice. Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B, 361(1476), 2173–2186. Acevedo, B. P., et al. (2012). Neural correlates of long-term intense romantic love. Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, 7(2), 145–159. Fletcher, G. J. O., Simpson, J. A., & Thomas, G. (2000). The measurement of perceived relationship quality components. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 26(3), 340–354. Lehmiller, J. J., & Agnew, C. R. (2007). Marginalized relationships. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 24(6), 947–969. Aquino, K., Reed, A., Thau, S., & Freeman, D. (2007). A grotesque and dark beauty. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 93(3), 385–400. Overall, N. C., & McNulty, J. K. (2017). What type of communication during conflict is beneficial for intimate relationships? Current Opinion in Psychology, 13, 1–5. 🌐 Additional Reading Note: All primary sources cited in this episode are peer-reviewed academic journals accessible through research databases such as PsycINFO, Google Scholar, and institutional libraries.

In this episode, we dive deep into the world of social media addiction—exploring why we can't stop scrolling, what it's doing to our brains, and how we can take back control without going completely offline. We break down: 🧠 The neuroscience behind social media addiction (dopamine, intermittent rewards, and infinite scroll) 🎯 Who's most vulnerable and why (hint: it's not just "weak-willed" people) 😥 The real consequences on mental health, relationships, and productivity 🤔 Why we CAN'T just quit social media entirely (spoiler: it's literally part of modern life) 🛠️ Practical strategies to use social media intentionally—without letting it use YOU Whether you've tried quitting before or you're just starting to notice your screen time creeping up, this episode is packed with research-backed insights and actionable tips to help you build a healthier relationship with your phone. Because the goal isn't to be chronically offline—it's to be intentionally online. 📋 Episode Overview 🎯 Introduction: What is social media addiction and why does it matter? 🧠 Segment 1: Why do we get addicted? (Neuroscience, psychology, and design) 😥 Segment 2: What are the consequences? (Mental health, relationships, performance) 🤑 Segment 3: Can we live without social media? (Spoiler: not really) 🛠️ Practical Strategies: How to escape the trap and use social media intentionally ✨ Conclusion: We don't need to quit—we need to learn how to use it properly 📚 Resources & References Organizations & General Information: American Psychiatric Association (APA) – https://www.psychiatry.org American Heart Association – https://www.heart.org World Health Organization – https://www.who.int Research & Studies Referenced: Studies on dopamine and reward systems in social media use Research on intermittent reinforcement schedules and addiction Studies linking heavy social media use to anxiety and depression Research on social media's impact on sleep quality and blue light exposure Studies on body image, eating disorders, and social media consumption Research on attention span reduction and cognitive impacts of social media Studies on loneliness paradox and superficial online interactions Research on social media as a mediator between body image and self-esteem Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) effectiveness for social media addiction Additional Resources: iPhone Screen Time and app timer features for setting boundaries Natacha Oceane (content creator mentioned in episode) Statistics on digital skills required in 92% of U.S. jobs Note: For specific academic papers and detailed citations, please refer to the full research notes or contact us at @tee.podcast on Instagram. ⚠️ Important Disclaimer If you or someone you know is struggling with social media addiction or any form of addiction, please know that help is available and seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness. Professional help can make a real difference. Addiction is a serious condition that often requires expert guidance, therapy, and support to overcome. You don't have to face it alone. International Addiction Resources: International Society of Addiction Medicine (ISAM) – Provides resources and connects individuals with addiction medicine professionals worldwide: https://www.isamweb.org SMART Recovery – Offers free, evidence-based support groups in multiple countries and languages: https://www.smartrecovery.org Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline (U.S.) – Free, confidential, 24/7 helpline: 1-800-662-4357 or visit https://www.samhsa.gov Remember: reaching out for help is the bravest and most important step you can take toward recovery.

Ever wondered what really happens in therapy? 🛋️ In this episode, we're breaking down everything you need to know about starting your therapeutic journey — from what therapy actually is (spoiler: it's not a quick fix!) to choosing the right therapist for YOU. We dive into the different types of therapy, the questions you should ask during your first consultation, and why finding the right fit might take a few tries. Think of it as your ultimate guide to navigating the world of mental health support! 💭✨ Whether you're therapy-curious or already on your mental health journey, this episode will help you understand what to expect and how to make the most of your sessions. 🎯 Episode Overview What therapy really is — and what it's NOT (it's a long-term investment, not a magic wand) Why therapy matters — the power of having an impartial space to grow Choosing the right therapist — comfort, alignment, credentials, and the importance of trial and error Different types of therapy — from Psychotherapy to CBT to Group Therapy Questions to ask your therapist — how to prepare for that first consultation The journey of self-discovery — why therapy is worth the effort 📚 Resources & References Ted Talks: Why You Should Try Therapy Yesterday | Dr. Emily Anhalt | TEDxBoulder What to expect from a therapy session | Alexis Powell-Howard | TEDxPatras How to Choose The Right Therapist Organizations mentioned: American Heart Association World Health Organization Note: Additional studies and research referenced throughout the episode support the importance of therapist-client relationship quality and therapeutic outcomes. ⚠️ Important Disclaimer This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care, diagnosis, or treatment. We are sharing our personal opinions and outlining research we have found, but we are not licensed mental health professionals. If you are experiencing a mental health crisis or need professional support, please seek help from a qualified therapist, counselor, or mental health provider. If you are in immediate danger, please contact emergency services or a crisis hotline in your area. Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider before making decisions about your mental health treatment.

🤔 Are you in the wrong career… or just burned out? Before you quit your job, hit pause. In this episode, we break down the difference between career misfit and burnout — and give you a science-backed 30-day plan to figure out which one you're actually dealing with. You'll learn: 🔥 Why burnout feels like being in the wrong career (and how to tell them apart) 🧩 The Career Clarity Triangle framework to assess your true fit 🔍 How to diagnose misfit using the 6 Areas of Worklife Model ⚡ The difference between energy alignment and just "following your passion" 🎯 A structured 30-day sprint to test, experiment, and decide your next move 💡 When it's actually time to leave (and when you just need better boundaries) We're not here to tell you what to do — we're here to help you make a data-informed decision instead of an emotional one. 🎧 Grab your journal, hit play, and let's get you some clarity. 📋 Episode Overview 🎙️ Introduction: The "Am I in the wrong career?" spiral 🔥 Part 1: Why burnout masquerades as career misfit 🧠 Part 2: The Career Clarity Triangle (work fit + need fit + life fit) 📊 Part 3: Diagnosing your misfit using the 6 Areas of Worklife Model ⚡ Part 4: Energy ledger vs. passion myths 💸 Part 5: The sunk-cost trap and how to escape it 📅 Part 6: The 30-Day Career Clarity Sprint (step-by-step) 🚪 Part 7: When it's actually time to leave 🎧 Part 8: Listening companion recommendations ✨ Conclusion: You're not behind — you're calibrating 📚 Resource List Research & Models Referenced 6 Areas of Worklife Model (Maslach & Leiter) — Framework for understanding burnout and organizational misfit Self-Determination Theory (Deci & Ryan) — Psychological needs: autonomy, competence, relatedness Occupational Regret Research — Studies on career dissatisfaction and constructive career transitions Podcasts & Episodes 80,000 Hours Podcast — Episode with Michelle Hutchinson on career changes and common career questions https://80000hours.org/podcast/episodes/michelle-hutchinson-giving-career-advice/ Radical Candor Podcast — Episode on cutting through career chaos and decision-making https://www.radicalcandor.com/podcast/career-decisions-6-19 Happen To Your Career Podcast — Career change strategy and experiments https://happentoyourcareer.com/podcast-archive/make-your-career-change-happen-with-this-unconventional-advice/ Videos & Talks TEDx Talk: "The importance of finding the wrong career first" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uv6iW_Pg7lg Organizations & Tools 80,000 Hours — Career advice and research on high-impact careers https://80000hours.org Radical Candor — Leadership and career guidance resources https://www.radicalcandor.com Happen To Your Career — Career coaching and transition support https://happentoyourcareer.com

Ever feel that weird knot in your stomach as your birthday approaches? You're not alone. In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, we dive deep into birthday anxiety — exploring why birthdays can trigger stress, fear of aging, and feelings of falling behind on life's "timeline." 🎂😰 We unpack the psychology behind gerascophobia (fear of aging), discuss societal pressures around milestone achievements, and share practical strategies to reclaim your birthday as a day of celebration rather than dread. Whether you love or loathe your birthday, this episode will help you understand those complicated feelings and maybe even learn to enjoy getting older. 🎉✨ 🎧 Episode Overview Why birthdays trigger anxiety — Fear of aging and unmet expectations explained Gerascophobia unpacked — Understanding the fear of growing old and its impact on mental health Theories of aging anxiety — From fear of death to double standards and stereotype embodiment The pressure of societal timelines — How the "social clock" makes us feel like we're falling behind Social media's role — Why curated online updates intensify comparison and birthday blues How to have a GREAT birthday — Practical tips including ditching expectations, retrospection, and focusing on the future Age is just a number — Reframing how we think about getting older and finding joy at every stage 📚 Resources & References Best Choice Counselling - The Fear of Getting Old: Birthday Blues, Anxiety and Depression Springer - Fear of Aging Research Article

🎙️ Breaking with Routine: How to Make Life More Fun Feeling stuck in the same loop? Life feeling a little… flat? You're not alone. In this episode, we're diving into why your brain craves novelty, how autopilot mode is quietly draining your joy, and most importantly — how to bring fun back into your everyday life without needing a personality transplant or a spontaneous move to Bali. ✨ We'll explore the psychology behind why fun matters (hint: it's not just a nice-to-have), share a practical 14-day plan to break the monotony, and remind you that fun isn't a reward for surviving your life — it's a condition for feeling alive in it. 🌟 In this episode, you'll discover: 🧠 Why your brain gets bored (and what that does to your mental health) 🔄 How routines keep you safe but stuck — and why novelty is the antidote 🎨 The difference between pleasure and fun (and why fun is more powerful) 📅 A realistic 14-day plan to inject joy back into your week 💡 Small, intentional ways to break the loop — no dramatic life overhaul required ✨ Why treating fun as a practice (not a personality trait) changes everything This isn't about becoming someone you're not. It's about rediscovering the person you've always been — the one who lights up when life feels alive, not just productive. 💛 So grab your headphones, take a different route today, and let's talk about how to make your life feel less like a to-do list and more like an adventure. 🎧 💬 We'd love to hear from you! What's one tiny novelty you're adding to your day? Tag us on Instagram @tee.podcast or drop us a DM! 🎧 Listen now wherever you get your podcasts — and don't forget to subscribe! 📚 Resource List Below are all the sources, articles, and references mentioned or alluded to in this episode: https://express.converia.de/custom/media/ESRI_2021/Verplanken__Roy____Whitmarsh__2018_.pdf https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2000_RyanDeci_SDT.pdf F. A. Huppert, N. Baylis, B. Keverne, Barbara L. Fredrickson; The broaden–and–build theory of positive emotions. Philos Trans R Soc Lond B Biol Sci 29 September 2004; 359 (1449): 1367–1377. https://doi.org/10.1098/rstb.2004.1512 Mazzucchelli, T. G., Kane, R. T., & Rees, C. S. (2010). Behavioral activation interventions for well-being: A meta-analysis. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 5(2), 105–121. https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760903569154 González-Cutre, D., Romero-Elías, M., Jiménez-Loaisa, A. et al. Testing the need for novelty as a candidate need in basic psychological needs theory. Motiv Emot 44, 295–314 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1007/s11031-019-09812-7 Podcast episodes we loved:  The Novelty Rule: How To Use My Neuroscience Hack That’s Changing Millions Of Lives - Liz Moody How To Make Your Life Exciting Again Give Yourself Permission to Have More Fun With Dr. Mike Rucker

In this episode, we dive deep into the science behind alcohol consumption, explore why humans have been drinking for centuries, and question whether going cold turkey for a month is actually helpful—or just another New Year's resolution waiting to fail. We discuss the real effects alcohol has on your body and brain, the social dynamics that make drinking so appealing, and why younger generations are choosing sobriety. But most importantly, we explore a better approach: curiosity over fear, gradual change over extreme challenges, and self-reflection over self-judgment. If you've ever wondered about your own drinking habits or felt pressured by sober trends, this episode is for you. We're not here to tell you what to do with your body—we're here to help you understand it better. 💭 ⚠️ Important Note on Alcohol Addiction & Support While this episode explores our relationship with alcohol in a social and cultural context, we recognize that for some, alcohol consumption is a serious health concern. Alcohol addiction is a medical condition that affects millions of people worldwide, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. If you or someone you know is struggling with alcohol dependency, please know that help is available. Reaching out for support is a sign of strength, not weakness. You don't have to face this alone. International Resource: Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is a global fellowship with meetings in over 180 countries. Their website offers resources, online meetings, and a meeting finder to help you connect with local support groups. If you're in crisis or need immediate assistance, please contact your local emergency services or a crisis helpline in your country. 🎧 Episode Overview What alcohol does to your body – From acetaldehyde toxicity to increased cancer risk, we break down the science Why we drink – The social and psychological reasons behind alcohol consumption Is Dry January a test or a trap? – Why strict resolutions can backfire and create stronger cravings A better approach – How curiosity, small changes, and self-awareness can lead to lasting transformation What does alcohol mean to you? – Reflective questions to help you understand your own relationship with drinking 📚 Resources & References Note: While specific sources were referenced in the script content, no explicit URLs or article titles were provided. Below are general topics discussed that listeners may want to explore further: Health effects of alcohol consumption (acetaldehyde, liver disease, cancer risks, dementia) Studies on alcohol and social bonding Trends in alcohol consumption among younger generations Gradual behavior change vs. cold turkey approaches Social norms and drinking culture evolution

🎙️ Ever wonder how your exes shaped the person you are today? In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, we dive deep into the psychology of past relationships—exploring how breakups disrupt your sense of self, why some people ruminate while others rebound, and how your attachment style influences your healing process. We'll discuss the science-backed concept of the "Anti-Wishlist"—using past relationship experiences to clarify what you absolutely don't want in future partners—and share practical strategies for turning emotional pain into personal growth. 💡 Episode Overview: 🧠 How breakups disrupt your identity and self-concept 💔 The psychological impact of losing a romantic partner 🔄 Rumination vs. meaning-making: which helps you heal? 🔗 How attachment styles (anxious vs. avoidant) shape your breakup experience 📝 The "Anti-Wishlist" exercise: turning red flags into boundaries ✅ Science-backed strategies for moving forward without getting stuck 🚫 Why no-contact might be better than staying "friends immediately" 📱 The hidden cost of digital footprints after a breakup Whether you're healing from a recent split or reflecting on relationships from your past, this episode offers evidence-based insights and real talk about how your exes built (and broke) you—and how you can use those lessons to date smarter. 🎧 New episodes drop every Wednesday. Subscribe now and follow us @tee.podcast! Resources . Who am I without you? The influence of romantic breakup on the self-concept Erica B. Slotter Wendi L. Gardner Eli J. Finkel Northwestern University Psychosocial Effects of Romantic Breakups During Emerging Adulthood: A Systematic Review Joana G. Fernandes, Carina Santos, Mariana V. Martins

Ever feel like your metabolism just isn't what it used to be? 🤔 In this episode, we're diving deep into the truth about metabolism, aging, and why those aggressive diets you see all over TikTok are doing more harm than good. We break down the science behind Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE), explain why your body fights back when you restrict calories too aggressively, and reveal the real reasons your metabolism might feel "slower" as you get older (spoiler: it's not magic, and you're not broken! 💪). From debunking viral diet trends to understanding the difference between weight loss and fat loss, this episode is packed with practical insights to help you approach your health from a place of self-love and care — not punishment. Whether you're curious about metabolism, tired of yo-yo dieting, or just want to feel your best in your own skin, this episode is for you! 🎧✨ 🔬 What is metabolism? Understanding TDEE and its four key components (BMR, PA, NEAT, TEF) ❌ Why aggressive diets fail: How extreme calorie restriction triggers your body's survival mechanisms 💡 The key difference: Weight loss vs. fat loss — and why muscle matters 🎭 Debunking TikTok trends: What I eat in a day videos, metabolism boosters, 10k steps, electrolytes, and more 💪 The real solution: Building and maintaining muscle while fueling your body properly 💖 Approach from self-love: Fat loss should come from caring for yourself, not punishing your body 🌟 Focus on performance: What can your body achieve? How strong, fast, or flexible can you become? Note: This episode references general fitness and nutrition science principles. For specific health concerns, always consult with a qualified healthcare professional. Follow Us: Instagram: @tee.podcast New episodes every Wednesday on your favorite podcast platform 🎧

In this episode of "Trial & Error & Error," we dive deep into the age-old tradition of New Year's resolutions. 🎉 Why do we set them? Why do we fail at keeping them? And more importantly, how can we actually make them stick? 💪 Join us as we explore the fascinating history of New Year's resolutions, from ancient Babylonian promises to the gods to modern-day gym memberships. We'll unpack the psychology behind the "fresh start effect" and discuss why temporal landmarks make us feel like we can finally get our lives together. ✨ We'll also get personal, sharing our own resolutions from 2025 and revealing what we're committing to in 2026. 📋 From finishing PhDs 🎓 to mastering pull-ups 💪, from improving finance literacy 💰 to simply being more present 🧘‍♀️—we're covering it all. Finally, we'll share practical, tried-and-tested tips for setting realistic and achievable goals that actually align with what YOU want for your life (not what society expects from you). 🌟 Because let's be honest—the best time to start becoming your best self isn't January 1st. It's right now. ⏰ Tune in for honest reflections, research-backed insights, and a healthy dose of motivation to seize the moment and make 2026 your year! 🚀 Follow Us: Instagram: @tee.podcast New episodes every Wednesday on your favorite podcast platform 🎧 📚 Resources & Links Research & Articles: The Fresh Start Effect: Temporal Landmarks Motivate Aspirational Behavior – Management Science journal article on how temporal milestones influence motivation and goal-setting behavior Books Mentioned: Atomic Habits by James Clear – Referenced for the "make it obvious" principle and habit formation strategies Quotes & Concepts: "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with" – Motivational concept popularized by Jim Rohn

Ring in the new year with us as we explore the wildest, weirdest, and most wonderful New Year's traditions from around the globe! From eating twelve grapes at midnight in Spain 🍇 to throwing plates at friends' doors in Denmark 🍽️💥, from jumping waves in Brazil 🌊 to getting booped by an onion in Greece 🧅 — this episode is packed with fascinating rituals that prove humanity knows how to celebrate. But it's not just about the quirks. We dive deep into the why behind these traditions — exploring the anthropology, psychology, and emotional significance of New Year's celebrations. Why do we love a fresh start? What makes midnight so magical? And are resolutions even worth it anymore? Join us for laughs, reflection, and maybe some inspiration for your own New Year's ritual. Whether you're a grape-eater, a chair-jumper, or a couch-prosecco-sipper, this episode will remind you that every tradition — no matter how strange — is really just an act of hope. 💫 Perfect for: Culture lovers 🌍, trivia enthusiasts 🤓, anyone who wants to feel globally connected as they countdown to midnight ⏰. What you'll learn: Unique New Year's traditions from over 15 countries 🗺️ The anthropology and psychology behind ritual celebrations 📚 Why humans love symbolic fresh starts 🔄 Fun lightning-round questions to spark your own reflection ⚡ Tune in, tag us with your traditions, and let's leap into the new year together 🎆 — same vibes, new intentions. 🎧💜 Articles / Academic Reads Marking the New Year Around the World – Human Relations Area Files (Yale) Cosmological Renewal: An Anthropological Analysis of New Year Celebrations in the Andes as a Rite of Passage – ResearchGate Five New Year’s Rituals of Renewal – Sapiens.org New Year’s Traditions Around the World – EBSCO Research Starters Podcasts / Videos “Unusual New Year Traditions” – Leonardo English Podcast “New Year Traditions & Celebrations Around the World #148” – LearnAboutPod “Folklore Friday: New Year’s Eve History” – Podbean “20 Strange New Year’s Traditions From Around the World” – YouTube Fun Source Links Travel.Earth – 10 Unusual New Year’s Eve Traditions AFAR Magazine – 14 New Year’s Traditions From Around the World Oxford Summer Courses Blog – New Year’s Eve Traditions Around the World Greenvelope.com – New Year’s Traditions

Christmas as an adult hits different. The magic is still there, but so is the stress, the spending, the family negotiations, and that nagging voice asking, "Did I do enough this year?" In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, we're unwrapping the complicated reality of Christmas in adulthood. From the financial pressure of gift-giving to navigating family traditions across cultures and relationships, we're getting real about what makes the holidays both wonderful and overwhelming. We discuss: ✨ How Christmas changes when you become the one organizing it 💸 The biggest holiday stressors (spoiler: money and expectations top the list) 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Juggling partner families and building your own traditions 🍷 Food, drink, and letting go of holiday guilt 📆 The end-of-year review spiral and how to survive it Whether you're dreading December or desperately trying to keep the festive spirit alive, this episode is your survival guide to enjoying the holidays without losing your mind — or your bank account. Tune in for honest conversations, practical tips, and a reminder that you're not alone in finding Christmas both magical and exhausting. 🎧 New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow us on Instagram (@tee.podcast) and share your holiday survival stories — we want to hear from you! Articles & Studies: American Psychological Association (2023) - Holiday Stress Survey: https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2023/holiday-stress Additional Resources: Tips for managing holiday stress and maintaining healthy eating habits during the festive season Strategies for budgeting and financial planning during Christmas Mindfulness and self-care practices for the holiday period

🎙️ It's time for the ultimate yearly wrap-up! In this reflective episode of "Trial & Error & Error," we're diving deep into the 12 Areas of Life framework by Zig Ziglar to look back on everything 2025 threw at us — the wins, the losses, the plot twists, and the glow-ups. From physical health and mental wellness to love, career, finances, creativity, and community, we're breaking down each area with honest reflections, personal stories, and the kind of sisterly banter that keeps it real. We're rating our year, sharing what we learned, and declaring our energy for 2026. Whether you're looking to reflect on your own year or just want to eavesdrop on our chaos, this episode is your permission slip to pause, process, and prep for your next chapter. Because life isn't about perfection — it's about growth, one messy, beautiful moment at a time. ✨ Topics we cover: Physical & mental health check-ins Love life updates and lessons Family, friendships, and boundaries Career wins and financial mindset shifts Personal growth, creativity, and spirituality Our 2026 energy declarations Grab your journal, your favorite drink, and join us for this cozy, cathartic conversation. Let's close out the year with clarity, gratitude, and a whole lot of main-character energy. 💬 Connect with us on Instagram @tee.podcast and share your own yearly reflections — we'd love to hear from you!

Summary Feel like time is slipping through your fingers? In this episode of "Trial & Error & Error," we dive into the paradox of being busy but not productive. Discover how to identify your "time villains" — those sneaky habits stealing your hours — and meet your "time heroes" that actually save you time. We explore the science behind effective time management, share practical micro-experiments you can try today, and introduce a fresh perspective: treating time like a messy best friend you need to learn to work with, not control. Join us for the 7-Day Time Experiment and learn to align your schedule with your values, energy cycles, and real priorities. Stop chasing time and start dancing with it. Takeaways Awareness is the first step: Conduct a time audit to track what you actually do for one day — you'll discover where your hours really go and identify your time villains. Align your schedule with your values: Time management works best when your calendar reflects your actual goals and priorities, not just other people's demands. Set boundaries to protect your time: If you don't guard your time, someone else will fill it for you. Be selective about what gets access to your schedule. Work with your natural rhythms: Align tasks with your energy cycles — do creative work when you're energized, and routine tasks when your energy is lower. Try the 7-Day Time Experiment: Track your time, identify one villain, test one change for a week, and reflect on whether it made you feel freer or more constrained. Time management is self-care: Research shows that regularly evaluating your priorities reduces anxiety and improves life satisfaction. Productivity isn't about doing more: It's about doing the right things efficiently. Focus on quality over quantity. Personify time as a character: Instead of trying to "manage" time, become fluent in its language — learn to dance with it rather than chase it. Resources: Aeon, B. & Aguinis, H. (2020). Does time management work? A meta-analysis. PLoS One, via PMC7799745 Aeon, B. et al. (2024). Time Management Interventions and Well-being. Frontiers in Psychology, via PMC10927119 T Mountain (C1042). 10 Strategies for Better Time Management - https://fieldreport.caes.uga.edu/publications/C1042/time-management-10-strategies-for-better-time-management/ Marquette University (2021). Effective Time Management for Students and Professionals - https://today.marquette.edu/2024/09/on-topic-eight-tips-on-improving-time-management/ Efron, N. (2023). Ten tips for efficient academic time management. Clinical and Experimental Optometry, 106(7), 691–693. https://doi.org/10.1080/08164622.2022.2139592 YouTubers: Ali Abdaal, Thomas Frank Podcasts: It’s About Time (Anna Dearmon Kornick), The Time Management Podcast (Abigail Barnes).

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, Ale and LJ explore the multifaceted experience of pet ownership, discussing the emotional connections formed with pets, the benefits and challenges of having them, and the grief associated with losing a beloved animal. They delve into the responsibilities that come with pet ownership, including financial considerations and the emotional readiness required to care for another being. The conversation highlights the joys and struggles of being a pet owner, making it clear that while pets bring immense joy, they also require significant commitment and care. Takeaways People are increasingly choosing pets over children. Having a pet can provide emotional support and companionship. Pets can help reduce feelings of loneliness and improve mood. Owning a pet instills a sense of responsibility and routine. Taking care of a pet can create a sense of accomplishment. Pets can facilitate social interactions and connections. The grief of losing a pet is often overlooked and misunderstood. Adopting a pet, especially a rescue, comes with unique challenges. Financial stability is crucial before getting a pet. Being emotionally ready for the commitment of a pet is essential. Resources: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/3872511/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbBMVa2A68s https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2772632023000028 https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-018-1613-2 https://health.ucdavis.edu/blog/cultivating-health/health-benefits-of-pets-how-your-furry-friend-improves-your-mental-and-physical-health/2024/04 https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.1261022 https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11776356/ https://www.cabidigitallibrary.org/doi/full/10.1079/hai.2020.0017 https://www.youtube.com/@TierZoo   

Summary In this episode, the hosts explore the complexities of non-confrontational confrontation, discussing its definitions, psychological aspects, personal experiences, and the impact of passive-aggressive behavior. They share insights on how to approach confrontation in a healthier way, emphasizing the importance of direct communication and the potential for strengthening relationships through constructive conflict resolution. Takeaways Confrontation can be non-aggressive and still effective. Passive-aggressive behavior often leads to misunderstandings. Avoiding confrontation can weaken relationships over time. Direct communication is essential for resolving conflicts. Humor can sometimes lighten the tension in confrontations. Setting clear goals for confrontation can lead to better outcomes. Taking time to process emotions before confronting is beneficial. Confrontation can strengthen relationships if handled well. Yelling is not the only way to confront issues. Understanding the psychology behind avoidance can help address it. Resources:  https://cmcffc.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/06/Confrontation-in-Addiction-Treatment.pdf https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/13684302241309872?casa_token=9XrJU4JaFpAAAAAA%3AOcsK2dc-tq0CyBTd9FUN4js-QDzOrkjTZ2PoNpQq_3GHTMo-gmKSOr8HRJ4L43jA185ngoFP1FFkHQ https://www.wondermind.com/article/confrontation/  

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, the hosts explore the phenomenon of 'therapy speak'—the rise of psychological language in everyday conversations, especially post-COVID. They discuss how terms like 'boundaries', 'toxic', and 'narcissist' have become commonplace, often losing their original meaning. The conversation delves into the potential misuse of these terms, particularly in weaponizing therapy language to control or silence others. The hosts emphasize the importance of self-awareness and responsible communication, urging listeners to reflect on their use of therapy language and its impact on relationships. Takeaways Therapy speak has become mainstream since COVID. Terms like 'boundaries' and 'toxic' can lose meaning when overused. Weaponizing therapy language can harm relationships. Real connection requires vulnerability, not just buzzwords. Social media amplifies the use of therapy terms. Misusing mental health terms can minimize real issues. Understanding toxicity requires context and self-reflection. Therapy language should facilitate understanding, not arguments. Self-awareness is key in using therapy speak responsibly. Therapy is about personal growth, not just self-indulgence. Resources:  ‘That’s triggering!’ Is therapy-speak changing the way we talk about ourselves? When ‘Therapy Speak’ Does More Harm Than Good The Rise of Therapy-Speak  

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, hosts Ale and LJ explore the themes of nostalgia, personal evolution, and the complexities of identity as they reflect on their past selves. They discuss the emotional landscape of nostalgia, the impact of life choices, and the balance between appreciating who we were and embracing who we are becoming. The conversation emphasizes the importance of recognizing the gifts of personal growth while acknowledging the challenges of change. Takeaways We often miss the versions of ourselves that were more carefree. Nostalgia can bring both joy and sadness. Life choices significantly shape our identities. The Polyanna effect influences how we remember the past. The future is uncertain, just as the past was. Nostalgia is common in our 20s due to many life changes. We can't go back to who we used to be. Embracing change is essential for personal growth. Our past selves are part of our current identity. Change should be viewed as an exciting journey.  

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, hosts Ale and LJ explore the complexities of financial literacy, particularly focusing on the decision to rent or buy property. They discuss the concept of financial avoidance, the current housing market landscape, and the various costs associated with home ownership. The conversation delves into the psychological aspects of owning a home, personal perspectives on property, and how generational differences shape views on success and financial stability. Ultimately, they emphasize the importance of making informed decisions that align with individual life goals rather than societal expectations. Takeaways Financial avoidance is common among young adults. Understanding money is crucial in today's economy. Home ownership rates vary significantly by country. Renting can sometimes be more financially sound than buying. Owning a home comes with hidden costs beyond the mortgage. Psychological comfort can be a reason to buy a home. Success in housing is being redefined by younger generations. Investing in oneself can be as valuable as property investment. The decision to buy should align with personal life goals. Flexibility in living arrangements is increasingly important. Resources:  https://open.spotify.com/episode/7BTd6244z2rItHIV2yGDY4?si=dd1e757b5ca6456d https://www.statista.com/statistics/246355/home-ownership-rate-in-europe/

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, hosts LJ and Ale delve into the complexities of being the 'bigger person' in various relationships. They explore the emotional toll, societal expectations, and personal identity conflicts that arise from this role. Through personal anecdotes and reflections, they discuss the pressures of always being the one to forgive and understand, and how this can lead to resentment and exhaustion. The conversation also touches on coping strategies to redefine what it means to be the bigger person, emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries and recognizing one's own worth.   Takeaways Being the bigger person often feels one-sided and exhausting. There is a societal expectation for certain individuals to always be the bigger person. Emotional exhaustion can result from constantly being the one to forgive. The concept of being the bigger person can lead to identity conflicts. It's important to acknowledge your efforts privately, even if others don't. Setting boundaries is crucial to maintaining emotional health. Not every conflict deserves your energy; choose your battles wisely. Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting; it's about adjusting expectations. The pressure to be the bigger person can stem from childhood experiences. Coping strategies can help redefine what being the bigger person means.  

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, hosts Ale and LJ delve into the world of romance literature, exploring various love tropes, the appeal of romance media, and its cultural significance. They discuss how romance novels serve as a form of escapism and emotional exploration, particularly for women, and highlight the importance of female representation in the genre. The conversation also touches on the impact of romance on feminism and the misconceptions surrounding its status in literature. Throughout the episode, they share personal anecdotes, book recommendations, and insights into the evolving perceptions of romance in society. Takeaways Romance is often dismissed as a guilty pleasure, but it has significant cultural value. Romance media provides escapism from daily responsibilities and emotional exploration. Female protagonists in romance novels empower women and validate their experiences. The romance genre is one of the largest in publishing, contributing significantly to adult fiction growth. Criticism of romance novels often stems from internalized misogyny and societal biases. Romance novels can serve as a feminist blueprint for women's lives and aspirations. Cultural perspectives on romance vary, influencing how love is portrayed in media. The hosts emphasize the importance of female representation in romance literature. Romance stories can help women see themselves as worthy of love and respect.  Resources:  Karandashev, V. (2015). A Cultural Perspective on Romantic Love. Online Readings in Psychology and Culture, 5(4). https://doi.org/10.9707/2307-0919.1135; Holland, Kiersten, "A Foray into Love: Feminism in the Romance Novel" (2024). Honors College Theses. 200. https://digitalcommons.murraystate.edu/honorstheses/200; https://www.buzzfeed.com/marycolussi/book-tropes-readers-love-and-hate.    See our Book Recommendations on our Instagram: @tee.podcast   

That post-vacation slump? We’ve all been there — the overflowing inbox, the endless catch-ups, and that creeping thought: Was my holiday even worth it? In this episode, we unpack what science says about the effects of vacation and why that relaxed glow fades so fast. From stress recovery and sleep quality to the emotional chaos of your first week back, we explore how to make the return to work smoother—for your productivity and your peace of mind. We’ll talk about: Why vacation benefits disappear so quickly The psychology of re-entry and workplace overwhelm How different types of workers recover (or don’t) Practical tips for easing back and keeping that “vacation feeling” alive What workplaces can do to make coming back less painful So grab your coffee, open that inbox (slowly), and join us as we figure out how to make Back to the Office a little less brutal — and maybe even restorative. Takeaways:  Vacations do boost your mood and energy — just not for long. Quality rest > length of vacation. Sleep is your real superpower. The “fade-out effect” is real — recovery fades fast once work starts. Feeling stressed or unmotivated after vacation? Totally normal. Ease in: prioritize, pace yourself, and reconnect with your team. Workaholics struggle most — they need mini-breaks built in year-round. Keep the vacation vibe alive: walks, hobbies, good sleep. Workplaces can help — lighter first weeks, smarter email rules. Try shorter, more frequent breaks instead of one big getaway. Real recovery isn’t a break — it’s a lifestyle. Resources:  de Bloom, J., Geurts, S.A.E. & Kompier, M.A.J. Vacation (after-) effects on employee health and well-being, and the role of vacation activities, experiences and sleep. J Happiness Stud 14, 613–633 (2013). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-012-9345-3; Sousa, C., & Gonçalves, G. (2019). Back to work bang! Difficulties, emotions and adjustment strategies when returning to work after a vacation. The International Journal of Human Resource Management, 32(10), 2242–2263. https://doi.org/10.1080/09585192.2019.1602784; de Bloom J., Radstaak M., and Geurts S. (2014), Vacation Effects on Behaviour, Cognition and Emotions of Compulsive and Non-compulsive Workers: Do Obsessive Workers Go ‘Cold Turkey’?, Stress Health, 30, 232–243, doi: 10.1002/smi.2600; We Continue to Recover Through Vacation! Franziska Speth, Johannes Wendsche, and Jürgen Wegge, European Psychologist 2023 28:4, 274-287, https://econtent.hogrefe.com/doi/abs/10.1027/1016-9040/a000518?journalCode=epp; https://www.forbes.com/sites/jackkelly/2023/09/07/how-to-manage-being-back-to-work-after-summers-over/.   

Summary In this episode, LJ shares her exhilarating experience attending the Little Simz concert, detailing the anticipation leading up to the event, the vibrant atmosphere, and the emotional connection they felt during the performance. They discuss the artist's background, the setlist, and the unique engagement with the audience, culminating in a heartfelt reflection on the impact of live music. Takeaways Easily one of LJ's top three concerts of all time. The concert atmosphere was electric and intimate. Little Simz' performance was a blend of genres. The setlist was perfectly curated, flowing seamlessly. Audience engagement was a highlight of the concert. Emotional moments were prevalent throughout the show. The artist's background added depth to the experience. Concerts can evoke unexpected emotional responses. Smaller venues create a more personal connection. Live music experiences are irreplaceable and transformative.

Summary In this episode, the hosts discuss the realities of living together with a partner, exploring the misconceptions and challenges that arise in cohabitation. They share personal experiences, the importance of communication, and how to maintain romance amidst daily routines. The conversation also touches on the negotiation of responsibilities and the sweet moments that make living together special. Takeaways The fantasy of living together often differs from reality. Communication is key in navigating shared responsibilities. It's common for couples to face similar challenges in cohabitation. Maintaining romance requires conscious effort even when living together. Living with a partner can reveal compatibility strengths and weaknesses. Small annoyances can lead to larger discussions about compatibility. Creating a cleaning schedule can help manage household tasks. Date nights are essential to keep the relationship exciting. Understanding each other's pet peeves can prevent conflicts. Living together can deepen the bond and create a unique shared life.  

Summary In this episode, the hosts explore the multifaceted experience of clubbing in your late 20s, discussing the cost-benefit analysis of going out, the importance of music and venue, the rising costs associated with clubbing, and the changing demographics of club-goers. They also touch on safety, consent, and etiquette in clubs, as well as trends in alcohol consumption among younger generations. The conversation wraps up with personal reflections on the benefits of clubbing and the social dynamics involved, ultimately encouraging listeners to evaluate their own experiences and choices regarding nightlife. Takeaways Clubbing in your late 20s involves a complex cost-benefit analysis. Music and the DJ play a crucial role in the clubbing experience. Costs of clubbing have significantly increased due to inflation. Safety and consent are critical discussions in the clubbing scene. There is a decline in alcohol consumption among younger crowds. Clubbing can provide social interaction and escapism. Personal experiences and reflections shape one's view on clubbing. It's important to evaluate your own costs and benefits when deciding to go out.  

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error and Error Podcast, hosts LJ and Ale explore the evolving concept of marriage in modern society. They discuss the decline in marriage rates, the rise of cohabitation, and the changing roles of gender in marriage decisions. The conversation delves into cultural perspectives, legal aspects, and the implications of single parenthood and divorce. Ultimately, they conclude that while marriage may be less common, the commitment to relationships remains significant, albeit redefined. Takeaways Marriage rates are declining globally, with more people opting for cohabitation. Cohabitation is often viewed as a trial run for marriage. People are marrying later in life compared to previous generations. The share of women getting married has decreased slightly, while men are marrying less frequently. Single parenting is becoming more common, influencing marriage decisions. Divorce rates are rising, but not as dramatically as often perceived. Marriage is evolving into a personal commitment rather than a societal expectation. Financial stability is a significant factor in marriage decisions today. Cultural perspectives on marriage vary widely across different regions. The future of marriage may involve less emphasis on the legal contract and more on personal commitment.  Resources:  https://ourworldindata.org/marriages-and-divorces https://www.vox.com/even-better/24127335/living-together-cohabitation-before-marriage-relationship-milestones   

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error and Error Podcast, the hosts delve into the complexities of office romances, discussing statistics, dynamics, and the cultural implications of workplace relationships. They explore the risks and rewards associated with dating colleagues, the generational differences in attitudes towards office romance, and the impact of gossip and professionalism in the workplace. The conversation emphasizes the importance of maintaining boundaries and professionalism while navigating the often messy world of workplace relationships. Takeaways Don't poop where you eat. Workplace romance is more common than expected. Gen Z is the most open to workplace relationships. Office romances can lead to gossip and drama. The dynamics of workplace relationships can be complicated. Men and women are viewed differently in office romances. It's important to maintain professionalism in the workplace. Gossip can be a significant downside to office romances. Understanding the risks is crucial before entering a workplace romance. Keeping relationships discreet can help avoid complications. Resources: https://www.forbes.com/advisor/business/workplace-romance-statistics/; https://www.bamboohr.com/blog/8-workplace-romance-facts-need-know-right-now

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, hosts LJ and Ale delve into the complexities of maintaining friendships with ex-partners. They explore the statistics surrounding this phenomenon, discuss the reasons why some people choose to stay friends with their exes, and weigh the pros and cons of such relationships. The conversation also touches on gender dynamics, emotional boundaries, and the impact of these friendships on current relationships. Ultimately, they conclude that while some may find value in these connections, many others advocate for a clean break.   Takeaways Around 60% of people maintain a friendship with an ex after a breakup. Friendships with exes can stem from security, practicality, civility, or unresolved romantic desires. Staying friends due to unresolved romantic desires often leads to negative outcomes. Practicality and civility are less likely to result in long-term friendships. Emotional confusion can hinder healing and moving on after a breakup. Maintaining friendships with exes can complicate new relationships. Gender dynamics play a role in how friendships with exes are perceived and maintained. It's important to set boundaries with current partners regarding friendships with exes. Not all breakups are toxic, and some may allow for healthy friendships later on. Ultimately, the decision to remain friends with an ex should be based on personal circumstances and emotional health.   Resources https://www.livescience.com/60057-staying-friends-with-ex-may-work.html https://today.yougov.com/society/articles/44073-do-americans-stay-friends-with-their-exes-poll https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/valley-girl-brain/201211/sorry-is-why-you-can-t-be-friends-your-ex Griffith, Rebecca & Gillath, Omri & Zhao, Xian & MARTINEZ, RICHARD. (2017). Staying friends with ex-romantic partners: Predictors, reasons, and outcomes: Friendship with ex-romantic partners. Personal Relationships. 24. 10.1111/pere.12197.  

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, the hosts delve into the myths surrounding marathon running, exploring its cultural significance, personal experiences, and the psychological aspects of training. They discuss the increasing popularity of marathons, the dangers of overexertion, and the importance of proper training. The conversation also touches on the philosophical insights of Socrates regarding physical training and the balance between setting realistic goals and pushing personal limits. Ultimately, the hosts conclude that while running can provide purpose and community, it is essential to approach it with awareness and preparation. Takeaways Running equals death. You need a proper training plan. Running can give you purpose and meaning to your life. Don't do what Pheidippides did. Train. You shouldn't push yourself.  Sources:  https://www.nyrr.org/media-center/press-release/2024_1104_tcsnycmbythenumbers  https://press.strava.com/articles/strava-releases-year-in-sport-report https://press.strava.com/articles/strava-releases-annual-year-in-sport-trend  Why everyone you know is running a marathon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_eBECX8qWQ&ab_channel=GöranWinblad https://open.spotify.com/episode/11NwWyVUrpfKTNs6QZsJsI?si=82AxlIg_QBGgPelIthVshQ

Summary   In this episode of Trial and Error, the hosts delve into the complexities of female rivalry, using the story of Cheryl as a case study. They explore the psychological and sociological aspects of why women often compete for social acceptance and how this manifests in relationships. The discussion touches on the Mean Girls Syndrome, the nature of enmity, and the dynamics of friendships, ultimately concluding that while rivalry can be challenging, it is also a natural part of social interactions among women.   Takeaways The idea of rivalry among women is deeply rooted in social dynamics. Cheryl's story illustrates the complexities of female friendships. Indirect aggression is a common form of bullying among women. The Mean Girls Syndrome highlights relational aggression in social settings. Understanding rivalry can lead to better relationships among women. Social circles can influence feelings of rivalry and competition. It's important to surround yourself with supportive people.

Summary In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, hosts Ale and LJ delve into the psychological phenomenon known as Impostor Syndrome. They explore its origins, societal influences, and personal experiences, discussing how it affects high achievers, particularly women. The conversation highlights the impact of social media on self-perception, the challenges faced in the workplace, and the importance of recognizing one's achievements. They also touch on the Dunning-Kruger effect and how to leverage Impostor Syndrome for personal growth, emphasizing the need to celebrate small wins and maintain a balanced perspective on success. Takeaways Impostor Syndrome affects many high achievers, especially women. Societal expectations play a significant role in self-perception. Social media can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy. Workplace experiences can trigger Impostor Syndrome. It's important to distinguish between feeling like an imposter and actual competence. The Dunning-Kruger effect illustrates the relationship between confidence and knowledge. Impostor Syndrome can motivate individuals to improve their skills. Celebrating small wins can help combat feelings of inadequacy. Self-reflection is key to understanding one's achievements. Maintaining a sense of humor about oneself is essential. Resources:  https://www.paulineroseclance.com/pdf/ip_high_achieving_women.pdf; https://www.oed.com/dictionary/impostor-syndrome_n?tl=true; https://thedecisionlab.com/biases/dunning-kruger-effect

In this episode of the Trial & Error & Error Podcast, Ale and LJ explore the complexities of love and relationships, discussing the importance of self-awareness, communication, and understanding what makes a good partner. They delve into the four essential questions to consider when seeking a partner, the significance of self-regulation versus co-regulation in relationships, and the role of gut instincts in dating. The conversation also touches on the challenges of modern dating, the importance of building a life together, and the lessons learned from past relationships.   Takeaways Self-awareness is crucial before seeking a partner. Self-regulation is key in maintaining healthy relationships. Your partner should enhance your life, not complete it. Trust your gut instincts when dating. Communication is vital for resolving conflicts in relationships. Embrace past relationships as learning experiences. Building a life with someone is a long-term commitment. You should never change your core values for someone else. Resources: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3UNQp9X0GKyNHPPAyj7a1d?si=5494c0d390ed4c14; 

In this episode of the Trial and Error Podcast, Ale and LJ dive into the ultimate millennial crisis: making friends in your late 20s. Join them as they share personal stories, research insights, and practical tips on navigating friendships in adulthood. From the challenges of relocating and career shifts to the impact of social media and remote work, discover how to foster meaningful connections in a world that often feels disconnected. Tune in for a candid conversation filled with humor, vulnerability, and the occasional life lesson. Don't miss out on this relatable and insightful discussion! Takeaways Making friends in adulthood is challenging due to life changes. The loneliness epidemic is affecting many adults today. Social media can create a facade of happiness, masking loneliness. Initiative is crucial in forming new friendships as an adult. Friendship requires effort, similar to dating. Vulnerability can help deepen connections with others. Not everyone you meet will become a friend, and that's okay. It's important to find people who resonate with your personality. Friendship dynamics change as people prioritize different life paths. The girls bathroom is a metaphor for supportive friendships. Resources: https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/05/090527111907.htm; https://www.americansurveycenter.org/research/the-state-of-american-friendship-change-challenges-and-loss/; 

In this episode of Trial and Error, hosts Ale and LJ explore the multifaceted concept of home. From personal anecdotes of moving across continents to cultural insights on migration, they delve into what it truly means to find and define home. With stories from Habitat for Humanity and reflections on their own journeys, they discuss how home can be both a physical place and a feeling tied to people and experiences. Tune in for a heartfelt conversation that resonates with anyone who has ever pondered the meaning of home. Takeaways Home is a subjective concept that varies for each individual. Migration statistics show that a significant portion of the population is moving to new countries. Personal experiences shape our understanding of home. Home can be defined by relationships and the people we surround ourselves with. Cultural transitions can make the idea of home more complex. The definition of home can evolve over time as life circumstances change. Home is not just a physical space but also an emotional one. Creating a sense of home in a new place requires effort and intention. Having friends in different places can enrich the concept of home. Home can be wherever you feel comfortable and happy. Resources:  https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/home; https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=home&page=1; https://worldmigrationreport.iom.int/msite/wmr-2024-interactive/;  https://www.habitat.org/stories/what-does-home-mean-to-you;  https://meaningofhome.ca/entries/70714?;  https://meaningofhome.ca/entries/province;  

Welcome to the debut episode of "Trial and Error... and Error!" Join Ale and LJ, two work besties, as they spill the tea and share the chaos of life, love, and everything in between. In this episode, get to know the hosts as they introduce themselves and the theme of their podcast. From their journey to Austria to their aspirations of becoming memes, Ale and LJ keep it real and hilarious. Grab a glass of wine and dive into their world of candid conversations and fun games. Don't miss out on the laughter and insights as they embark on this exciting podcasting adventure!

We're just work besties trying to start a podcast... but first, we have to figure out how to actually record one. This blooper has mic confusion, setting disasters, and the kind of banter that’ll make you feel like you're right there with us (struggling). It’s messy, it’s real, it’s SO us. 🎧✨

We said we were starting a podcast — we didn’t say we’d do it quietly. Our first Bloopers is pure chaos: mic checks, accidental singing, and us getting dramatic about volume levels. This is your official behind-the-scenes moment. Listen in before the real episodes drop! This blooper is your official welcome to the madness — and it’s only the beginning. 🎧✨