your earthy black girl

i'm always like "i have a strong intuition" until it comes time to actually use it. it wasn't until i saw a tiktok talking about how there is nothing that can be done behind my back because i'll always dream it or feel it. and it made me start thinking that i do not lean into my intuition as much as i should and i often take this spiritual gift for granted. not everyone has the ability to discern between what's good and bad for them so that isn't a gift to be unappreciated.

whenever i go through some heartbreak i always get a strange sense of deja vu. it feels like even though it was a different person and a different situation, it was the same lesson to be learned. i realized that the universe is going to keep sending different people to teach me the same lessons until i learn them. its up to me to break the cycle and realize what higher powers think i need to learn.

recently, i've noticed that before i open an application for a scholarship, job, internship, or think about my future career there's been a looming dread and anxiety over it. i start thinking about how much work it'll be, how competitive it is, how likely i am to succeed? these fears were keeping me from so many opportunities that i had to remember two things: i can do anything i put my mind to and what's meant for me will never pass me. these two affirmations have been able to help me out with this anxiety, along with telling myself do it scared, do it with competition, do it with anxiety, no matter what, just do it.

when they say college and learning to balance is hard… believe them! i’ve had to realize that it’s not feasable to bring old routines into new schedules. it ends up impacting all areas of your health (social, mental, and emotional) without you even realizing it.

a lot of times i’ve had to remind myself that someone’s potential is just what i would do in their situation. the more and more i hang onto their capacity to do better as a friend, family member, or partner i waste time when instead i could pour that energy into people who are fully “potenshed.”

throughout high school when i would fall out with friends, i’d have a victim mentality and automatically assume that the other person was just in the wrong. recently, i’ve started to consider the fact that it’s not about whether the person was right or wrong. .. it’s about whether i find that right or wrong (not everyone has the same beliefs) and if i want to surround myself with friends who don’t agree with me. there is no objectivity to the situation, if i think it’s wrong and you think it’s not, then that’s where our friendship ends so we can find people who our values align with.

my mom always used to tell me that a main contributor to my heartbreak was that i give so much of myself to people and then i can't take it back. this has stuck to me and although i'll never not be my open, loving, self, i will slow down and think about my interactions with people and if they are worthy of my time, energy, and love. and you all should do the same. protecting your heart does not mean closing yourself off.

i feel like a lot of times people demonize the ego and glorify intuition instead of understanding ego is a crucial part of your identity that serves to protect you and be there in the decision-making process. sometimes we need to make decisions with our ego, even if they’re gonna keep us where we are because we cannot handle the risk in our lives. and sometimes we need to make decisions with our intuition so that we can elevate because we are have that room to improve.

when we’re younger we’re so in tune with our creativity but i feel like as we get older it’s conditioned to fade away. when you’re a kid you’re making macaroni crafts and turkey hands just for fun without caring if the finished product is “perfect.” let’s bring that back. instead of doom scrolling and constant consumption, lets bring back that childlike creativity. whatever that may look like.

Sometimes I feel like a hypocrite the way that I present myself. That’s why I always want to be transparent with you guys because I don’t want people comparing themselves to me how I find myself comparing me to others in my niche. That’s why it makes me feel like a fraud in my own aesthetic the way I live vs them but that’s why they say comparison is the thief of joy.

A lot of times when we are manifesting something or praying for something we will ask for signs that’s it’s coming. This is for reassurance or confirmation but most of the time it just stresses us out twice as much. If I don’t see my sign, is my desire not coming? If I do see it, then where’s my desire? All in all, just stop asking and then you’ll receive.

When I saw that thewizardliz got cheated on, I immediately thought: this goes to show that no matter how confident you are or how much you love yourself someone who wants to hurt you is going to do just that and it has nothing to do with you.

Often times we think that since we've put so much time, effort, and love into someone we love we almost owe it to ourselves to see things through. On the flip side, we think that if we given up someone else will reap the benefits of everything we've sewn. It's always important to remember that we don't owe anyone raising them, and if they can find love, so can you.

Let’s say you’ve been talking to someone for a short period of time but you think you’re in love. You’re not in love, you’re emotionally easy. We know energy flows where focus goes. If this person hasn’t been a person worthy of your love (through actions, consistency, trials/circumstance, etc.) this is the emotional easiness talking.

Sanaa gives a message to anyone who feels like they are lost after a breakup and don’t know what to do with themselves. She reminds everyone that this is a chance to reconnect with yourself and work on you, for you.

Sanaa talks about how it’s selfish to know that you can’t give someone everything they deserve but you keep them around because you know they won’t leave. Whether intentional or not, this is manipulation and anyone in this situation needs to let that person go.

Sanaa talks about the four different attachment styles and how being unaware of yours / your partners’ can be detrimental to relationships.

Sanaa talks about how in her experience, she has questioned whether or not she was a good friend due to her constant judgment of her friends’ choices. Although this may still be the quality of a bad friend, she best describes it as unempathetic empathy which she explains as being concerned for your friend to the point where you lash out on them to “help.” Very unhealthy, and something to work on.

Sanaa talks about how often people will cling to the idea of them having a past right person wrong time but if that person was really the right person, then there would be only the right time.

Sanaa shares that self love is much better than self-confidence because self-love transcends the physical and focuses on the internal. The ultimate form of self love is self-respect.

Sanaa talks about how often we will think that we are fully healed, but in reality we are just distracted and away from our triggering state making us think that we are fully OK.

Sanaa talks about how it is equally easy to flip our narrative and focus on the positive instead of just the negative.

Sanaa explains that the best way to get over an ex, and to stop yourself from going back to your ex. It all boils down to self love, abundance vs lack mindset, and discipline.

Sanaa teaches us how to be confident/how to stop being insecure. When looking at it from a body positivity/body neutrality standpoint we shouldn’t be insecure despite societal expectations because we are a collection of stars…in skin bags… on a floating rock…

Sanaa talks about how often we’ll be committed to people who don’t deserve it. There are so many other fish in the sea and yet we’re wasting our time and energy on people who aren’t on our level.

Sanaa talks about how Black women often forget their own strength and beauty. Let this video be a reminder to stop sleeping on yourself. You are everything, you are enough, and you deserve all the good things that are coming your way.

Sanaa talks about how healing has become a buzzword recently and instead of enjoying life people obsess over healing… as if we were broken to begin with.

Sanaa talks about how we depress and stress ourselves by thinking about the past and future respectively. Neither of these exist all we have and need is the present moment and if we realized this it would alleviate a lot of unnecessary suffering we cause ourselves.

Sanaa talks about how often people think they need to be 100% healed before they get into a new relationship or new job. However, she emphasizes the importance of letting that experience fuel your hurt and healing instead of just sitting around trying to accumulate “healedness” that will never be put into practice.

Sanaa talks about how we are all eating in each other’s character development and how realizing this can help one not take actions against them as personally.

Sanaa talks about how easy it is when you are trying to develop yourself or going through a break up to hate yourself or what you’re feeling at the moment. Instead, you have to rise above these big feelings and the current state that you were in and love yourself into evolution versus hating yourself into change. Similar to you have to feel out your emotions instead of push them down or else they’ll just come back up.

Sanaa talks about the importance of loving your limiting beliefs into evolution during manifestation, rather hating them into change which is less effective.

Sanaa talks about how she’s been working through her most recent breakup and what that experience has taught her and shown her.

Sanaa talks about the normalization of hookup culture and being nonchalant.

Sanaa talks about why she stopped being positive. Similar to the body neutrality over body positivity movement, she shares how embracing both positive and negative emotions with no judgement has been better in the long run.

Sanaa talks about the mixed emotions of being a senior: sadness, joy, nervousness, excitement. However, as she “vents” she comes to realize that as sad as senior year and graduation is, it’s a blessing and a stepping stone into the new chapter of her life.

Sanaa talks about her hair journey AGAIN and how it’s been transformed and continued with her combing out her locs. She uses examples and shares the overarching theme that confidence is a never ending journey that has ebs and flows throughout life.. one that she’s still navigating herself.

Sanaa is back… again.. but she talks about how she wants this podcast to be a sense of accountability. She feels as though she’s a “jack of all trades” master of none and so this podcast (her newfound hobby) will help motivate her audience but her as well. Speaking of motivate her audience, she does a check in for her fellow seniors and lets them know they aren’t alone.

Sanaa talks about spiritual psychosis and how sometimes in our journey for self improvement we can get wrapped up in thinking we are broken things to be fixed.

Sanaa talks about her experience being masculinized recently after loccing up her hair and how at first this made her heavily insecure, but has now caused her to have immense self love and deep rooted, unwavering confidence.

Sanaa talks about how she balances hobbies, extracurricular, school, friends/family etc. Although falling short sometimes she uses discipline physically (not violence..) and mentally to keep herself balanced.

Sanaa talks about why you’ll never FIND happiness but how gratitude and presence can help individuals to BE happy.

Sanaa talks about why it is important that even after someone does you dirty, not to be bitter or hateful because that person is operating off of their personal mental/emotional state.

Sanaa talks about her opinion on the “sprinkle sprinkle” lady and this generations obsession with “get backs”. She delves into how we can stay true to our true nature in spite of everyone else and spread love.

Sanaa talks about how she has dealt with a relationship in her life recently where she felt she outgrew the individual and had to cut them off. For anyone else who can relate, she shares how you can cope with the spiritual loneliness afterward.

Sanaa talks about her loc journey and what that has taught her about letting go of attachments and expectations of her hair.