From Harm to Healing

In this episode, Chris continues exploring “The 22 Rooms.” Part one focused on the covert phase of deceptive sexuality. In this second part, he turns to the exposure phase - when the hidden reality of the secret sexual basement is either discovered or disclosed. He examines the acute reality fragmentation that can occur at this stage, along with the associated attachment injury, before exploring the traumatic symptoms that often follow.

In this episode, Chris beings exploring “The 22 Rooms” — a key clinical framework within the DST model. Whilst the rooms have been mentioned on various occasions, this marks the first in a series of episodes dedicated to exploring the framework in more depth. The first instalment begins by explaining the core metaphor of the rooms and then examines the first three, which represent the covert phase of deceptive sexuality trauma.

This is the second part of the conversation Chris recently had with Trish Haight to discuss the DST model, objectification to humanisation, and the difference between surface-level change and deeper transformation. Trish is a DST therapist who co-facilitates the DST training programme with Dr Omar Minwalla and played a key role in developing the model. Find out more: Website: https://trishhaight.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trish.haightmft

Chris recently sat down with Trish Haight for a second time to discuss the DST model, focusing on the shift from objectification to humanisation of self and others. They also examine the difference between surface-level change and deeper transformation. This episode features the first half of that conversation. Trish is a DST therapist who co-facilitates the DST training programme with Dr Omar Minwalla and played a key role in developing the model. Find out more: Website: https://trishhaight.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trish.haightmft

In this episode, Chris explores the topic of internal vs external motivation and it's importance when we consider approaching any kind of therapeutic work. In particular, he considers what the research has to say about client outcomes, and also the negative outcomes that might occur if somebody is approaching their recovery journey from a place of purely external motivation.

In this episode, Chris continues to explore attending work, this time focussing on the bigger picture of how healing can actually happen when there is a abuse, victim, trauma story that needs to be told.

In this episode, Chris continues exploring the topic of authenticity and it's importance to the task of attending to deceptive sexuality trauma. He also explores some of his own therapeutic journey and how it contributed to these ideas of attending vs fixing, or conditions over techniques as taught within the DST model.

In this episode, Chris continues exploring the topic of the voice. In particular, he explores the idea of authentic reality, and how accuracy and truth in recovery aren't enough by themselves - there also needs to be a growing expression of authenticity about the self. He concludes by sharing an introduction that's often used in the From Harm to Healing groups to highlight the central pillars of self-contact and authentic use of the human voice.

Chris recently sat down for another conversation with Dr. Omar Minwalla to explore the topic of the human voice, based on Dr. Minwalla's recent whitepaper. In this episode, he specifically breaks down the top five reasons that the human voice is the key clinical instrument when healing from - or treating - deceptive sexuality and deceptive sexuality trauma.

Chris recently sat down for another conversation with Dr. Omar Minwalla to explore the topic of attending work - how the person that maintained the secret sexual basement can learn to attend well to it's traumatic repercussions for the betrayed partner and the injured relationship . Today's episode is the second part of that discussion.

Chris recently sat down for another conversation with Dr. Omar Minwalla to explore the topic of attending work - how the person that maintained the secret sexual basement can learn to attend well to it's traumatic repercussions for the betrayed partner and the injured relationship . Today's episode is the first part of that discussion.

In this episode, Chris explores the purpose and process of full therapeutic disclosure, explaining how disclosure is not simply an exchange of facts, but a critical act of restorative justice—designed to redress the power imbalance created by secrecy and deception.

In this episode, Chris explores how power and control shape both the harm caused by deceptive sexuality and the recovery process that follows. He also introduces the concept of restorative justice—a key pillar of the DST model—and contrasts it with a retributive, punishment-based mindset.

Chris recently sat down for another conversation with Dr. Omar Minwalla to delve deeper into the topic of healthy masculinity, and how it relates to "The Three I's" of integrity, intimacy, and integration. Today's episode is the second part of that discussion.

Chris recently sat down for another conversation with Dr. Omar Minwalla to delve deeper into the topic of healthy masculinity, and how it relates to "The Three I's" of integrity, intimacy, and integration. Today's episode is the first part of that discussion.

This is the second half of the conversation Chris recently had with Trish Haight to discuss her work and to illuminate what the journey of healing can look like for the betrayed partner and the injured relationship. Trish is a DST therapist that co-facilitates the DST training program with Dr. Omar Minwalla and was a key part of the models development. You can find out more about Trish by visiting her website here: https://trishhaight.com/

Chris recently sat down with Trish Haight to discuss her work and to illuminate what the journey of healing can look like for the betrayed partner and the injured relationship. Today's episode is the first half of that conversation. Trish is a DST therapist that co-facilitates the DST training program with Dr. Omar Minwalla and was a key part of the model's development. You can find out more about Trish by visiting her website here: https://trishhaight.com/

In this episode, Chris introduces 2 more DST frameworks — the three plates (the person who built the basement, the betrayed partner, and the injured relationship) and the five stages of treatment (assessment, stabilization, metabolization, reconstruction, expansion) — a helpful way of considering what progress and recovery might look like on this journey, and what some of the important clinical tasks might be along the way.

Chris recently sat down with Dr. Omar Minwalla to have some in-depth conversations about different aspects of his DST model. Today's episode is the third excerpt from those conversations where they dive deeper into the topic of integration and why it's such an important part of treatment for infidelity and compulsive sexual behaviour.

Chris recently sat down with Dr. Omar Minwalla to have some in-depth conversations about different aspects of his DST model. Today's episode is the second excerpt from those conversations where they dive deeper into the topic of intimacy and why it's such an important part of treatment for infidelity and compulsive sexual behaviour.

Chris recently sat down with Dr. Omar Minwalla to have some in-depth conversations about different aspects of his DST model. Today's episode is an excerpt from those conversations where they dive deeper into the topic of integrity and why it's such a crucial missing piece from so many treatment approaches for infidelity and compulsive sexual behaviour.

In this episode, Chris introduces the idea of “The Triadic Core” — sexuality, gender, and the physical body — as the most sensitive parts of the human psyche. We explore how sexual betrayal uniquely harms each area, why these wounds run so deep, and how understanding them can foster greater empathy for betrayed partners.

In this episode, Chris explores how subtle, repeated patterns of harm might gradually shape a betrayed partner’s emotional and psychological world. Using the “drops of water on a rock” metaphor, he explains how complex trauma impacts areas like trust, self-worth, and meaning — often without clear signs of abuse.

In this episode, Chris explores how partners impacted by deceptive sexuality often engage in safety-seeking behaviours and how these behaviours are often misunderstood, leading to pathologizing or the partners and victim blaming.

In this episode, Chris explores how the discovery of a secret sexual reality within a relationship can lead to acute trauma. Using the clinical framework of PTSD, he begins unpacking the psychological and physiological responses partners often experience—including triggers, re-experiencing, avoidance, mood changes, and nervous system arousal.

In this episode, Chris starts to explore the "T" in DST – the trauma caused by deceptive sexuality. In particular, he considers the importance of understanding both the acute impact of discovery and the long-term effects of deception and manipulation.

In this episode, Chris explores why the DST model identifies deceptive sexuality as an abusive system, by unpacking how patterns of deception and manipulation—used to hide a secret sexual reality—create covert control and a power imbalance in the relationship.

In this episode, Chris introduces the concept of "Integrity-Abuse Disorder" (IAD) — the second behavioural system identified in the DST model. Whilst "Compulsive Entitled Sexuality" (CES) explains the actions inside the secret sexual basement, IAD explores the deceptive behaviours used to keep it hidden.

In this episode, Chris explores the first part of the DST model’s two-part problem: the sexual or relational behaviours that take place inside the secret sexual basement. Chris introduces the concept of Compulsive-Entitled Sexuality (CES), a hybrid framework that broadens the traditional focus on sex addiction by including both compulsive behaviours and underlying entitlement.

In this first episode, therapist Chris Jones introduces the core concepts of the Deceptive Sexuality Trauma (DST) model, breaking down the idea of a "deceptive, compartmentalized, sexual-relational reality" (DCSR) and explains the foundational metaphor of the "secret sexual basement."