Mama You Belong

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the invisible load of motherhood...This podcast is for you.Today, Kirsten and Molly talk about the messy middle of motherhood, from spring energy and cluttered homes to the reality that “finishing everything” is a myth:• spring transitions and the pressure to do it all • "Type C" mom life, executive function, and choosing what actually matters • the invisible stress of clutter, and the mental load • Molly loses "preferred parent" status and explores the emotions that come with it Then Kirsten shares a raw and heartfelt update on her eldest daughter's AuDHD journey, and what changed when she and her husband stopped forcing school and started centering safety:• IEP advocacy, school transitions, and why fifth grade collapsed • pulling a child from school, and the real work of homeschooling • AuDHD in girls, high masking, and how she presents at home can look “worse” • deciding on trying medication and navigating side effects• anxiety support, and what improvement actually looks like • co-regulation at night, and releasing outdated “giving in” narratives • returning to school with therapy and a plan led by the child • what a short med gap revealed about regulation and resilience If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with other moms carrying more than most people can see. Subscribing to our podcast and leaving us a review is one of the best ways for other people to find us. So if it resonates with you, please subscribe and leave us a review.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Kirsten and Molly trace how micro self care rituals, witnessing a transformative birth, and the mother tree metaphor point to a different way of caring and showing up for each other and our children. We share how mutual aid led by moms keeps communities alive while we practice radical acceptance and parenting through ongoing societal collapse and crisis.• micro choices that steady nervous systems• returning to sleep, books, and play• witnessing Molly's sister's transformative and supported birth• mother trees as a model for reciprocity and the matriarchy we need• the inspirational mutual aid organizing led by moms• asking for help and widening circles• parenting amid chronic crisis with acceptance• decapitalizing our daily life and resourcing each otherIf you enjoyed this episode, please share it with other mamas, subscribing to our podcast and leaving us a review is one of the best ways for other people to find us.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

This episode is a brief glimpse into our upcoming interview with Marsh Naidoo on her amazing podcast Raising Kellan. Please subscribe now to her podcast so you can listen to our full interview when it is released. Raising Kellan Website here for more info! "Empowering, connecting and educating parents raising a child with a disability. For parents. By parents."In this episode on Mama You Belong:Molly updates for listeners outside of Minnesota that the occupation in the Twin Cities is still happening and there is no end in sight.Look for our upcoming interview on the Raising Kellan podcast soon!Kirsten shares a letter from a Minneapolis mom and university educator living through Operation Metro Surge and reflect on what daily life looks like when federal raids shape commutes, classrooms, and care plans.We highlight independent journalists, legal observers, and BIPOC creators documenting events in real time—voices you won’t always find in national headlines:You’ll leave with tools that turn concern into action: Stand with Minnesota for testimonies and mutual aid links, Resistance Guide to match your capacity to real tasks, and Five Calls to reach elected officials with targeted scripts. On Instagram:@onsitepublicmedia@toussaintmorrison@minneapolisward2@sahanjournal@bygeorgiafort@nekimal@minnesota50501@[email protected]@minnesota_neighbors@standwithminnesota@immigrantlawcentermn@immigrantdefensenetwork@singingresistancetcOn Substack:Toussaint MorrisonZedeWebsites:Stand with Minnesota - Website that consolidates testimonies, resources, and mutual aid opportunities.Resistance Guide - Free web app that helps match you to relief efforts based on your location, time commitment, and level of risk.5 Calls App - Free app that identifies your elected officials, provides contact information, and scripts. If this conversation moves you, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a review to help more people find these stories. What small action will you take today to stand with families in Minnesota?Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

We sit with the dissonance of parenting during a state crackdown in Minnesota, holding mother rage and grief while trying to protect childhood for our children. Stories from Minneapolis, a terrifying night terror, and our feelings as mothers.• naming the split between normal routines and escalating state force• how algorithms, media gaps and proximity shape what we know• whiteness, safety as illusion and why change is allowed• anger as data, grief underneath and redirecting hate into love and protection• night terrors explained, patterns, airway and sleep hygiene links• nervous system care through movement and community support• centering children’s experiences and mutual aid• what it means to keep going without normalizing harmIf you enjoyed this episode, please share it with other mamas!Subscribing to our podcast and leaving us a review is one of the best ways for other people to find us.Star Tribune Article about changing your mindMyofunctional Therapist in the Northland 5 Calls app - CALL YOUR REPSSupport the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

 In this episode, we talk openly about updates to toddler sleep struggles, no more night drives just to get a child to sleep, the decision to retire the crib, and how co-sleeping in a king bed changed everything. We unpack how loving, clear boundaries reduced bedtime chaos and how letting go of the “perfect” 7 p.m. bedtime helped ease our own mom guilt, shame, and anxiety around sleep. From there, we move into the daily reality of daycare life: big feelings at pickup, sensory overload, and what it looks like to listen to a child’s body that needs movement, wrestling, and connection after a long day. Then comes the daycare illness cycle: colds, strep, and six ear infections since summer... along with the weighty decisions around mild hearing loss and ear tubes. We name the math no one hands you as a parent: PTO that isn’t rest, missed income from client-facing work, mounting medical bills, and the invisible labor of tracking symptoms, dosing medication, scheduling appointments, and making constant judgment calls. This is where the mental load of motherhood becomes undeniable, and why workplace culture matters far more than empty platitudes. Planning for sick seasons, we argue, should be part of every postpartum conversation. Along the way, we speak the quieter truths many parents carry: resentment when the default sick parent pushes through, the tug-of-war between caregiving and work, and the grief for the versions of parenthood and careers we hoped to have by now. We also share what genuinely helped. If you’ve ever felt alone doing the late-night calculus of sleep, illness, work, and parenting, this conversation offers validation and practical shifts you can try tonight. If this episode resonated, tap follow, share it with a friend who’s in the thick of toddler sleep or daycare sickness, and leave a quick review to help other parents find the show. Your support helps this community grow. Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Winter presses in and everything gets louder, especially the expectations placed on moms during the holidays. In this episode, we return from a hiatus to talk honestly about the mental load of motherhood in December, the pressure to create holiday magic, and how easy it is to perform joy while running on empty.We swap stories, a road trip that dodged snowstorms, a surprise porcupine encounter, and a partner who literally clapped at a lamp.... But beneath the laughter is a deeper truth many overwhelmed moms know well: the invisible labor, perfectionism, and “shoulds” that make the holidays feel heavy instead of joyful.We talk candidly about skipping Thanksgiving and Black Friday to protect our peace, how perfectionism hides in traditions we feel obligated to perform, and why some holiday rituals feel more like public performances than meaningful family moments. A gingerbread house meltdown becomes our stand-in for motherhood expectations, how tightly we cling to outcomes, and how quickly they fall apart with toddlers, sensory overload, and messy icing.From there, we explore a gentler way forward for moms feeling burned out by the holidays: choosing fewer, truer rituals; loosening our grip on results; and letting magic show up where it actually fits, like spontaneous night sledding under yard lights.The mental load of motherhood gets its due as we unpack the reality of gift planning, budgeting, buying, wrapping, and shipping while juggling work, sickness, and bedtime marathons. Gifting can be creative and loving when it’s supported, so we offer practical ideas for the next ten days: smaller gift lists, one decision a day, delegating pickups and shipping, intentionally sending some gifts late, and trading performative traditions for ones that fit your real family life.If you’re a mom who needs permission to do less, feel more, and let go of holiday perfectionism—this conversation is for you.If this episode made you feel seen, share it with a friend, subscribe for more honest motherhood conversations, and leave a review to help other moms find the show. 💬 Tell us: what’s one holiday tradition you’re rewriting this year?Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

We follow Kirsten’s path from noticing things about her child to an autism + ADHD diagnosis, showing how clarity changed home life, school decisions, and self-trust. We talk sensory needs, high masking in girls, 504 vs IEP, and choosing connection over forced resilience.• trusting instincts alongside expert guidance• sensory needs hidden as quirks and stims• second child as context for nervous system differences and what's "typical"• pandemic chaos• teacher concerns - they finally see what we've been seeing• 504 accommodations vs legally binding IEP• choosing a clinic for diagnostic testing• diagnosis as language, not stigma, for self-understanding• school focus on tolerance versus environmental change• boundaries with systems and protecting family energy• resources for autistic girls and high-masking profilesThis conversation is a map for parents who feel unseen by charts and checklists. It offers language for advocating with schools, ideas for crafting a home that regulates instead of battles, and resources for recognizing high-masking autistic girls. Most of all, it’s permission to replace “tolerance training” with environments that fit. If this resonates, share it with a friend, subscribe for more grounded conversations, and leave a review so others can find us. Your story could be the lifeline another parent needs today.Resources:Yellow Lady Bugs - Podcast, book, source of a ton of info for neurodivergent girls and gender diverse youth Tilt Parenting/Differently Wired book - This is another awesome resource to help make sense of how to navigate parenting neurodivergent kiddosTelepathy Tapes - A podcast exploring how some non-speaking autistics communicate.If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with other mamas!Subscribing to our podcast and leaving us a review is one of the best ways for other people to find us.You can always email is at [email protected] to let us know what you think, leave a story of how the show impacted you, or just say "hey"!Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Kirsten traces the journey from pressure-filled, sleep training newborn days to a more child-centered and connected approach to sleep. Together, we share how postpartum rage became a compass, how sensory needs shaped real rest, and why prioritizing relationship over rules brought relief.• check in: school strain reaches a tipping point and home education is considered; Molly pursuing an amazing creative endeavor!• Kirsten's experience as a first time mom. The sleep "shoulds" were HEAVY• postpartum rage named as boundary signal and guide• the weight of sleep training culture and external validation• sensory input, proximity, and ritual as sleep supports• co-sleeping stigma vs what actually works for rest• unlearning rigid schedules or expectations and centering relationship over expectations• grief for lost early weeks and permission to choose differentlyResources:Duluth Perinatal - perinatal mental health and parenting resources curated by a perinatal mental health therapist My Connected Motherhood - Sleep consultants WITHOUT SLEEP TRAINING. Love them.Nurture Neuroscience Subscribing to our podcast and leaving us a review is one of the best ways for other people to find us. So if you enjoy what you are hearing or if it resonates with you, please subscribe and leave us a review. It would mean a lot.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Why do so many moms feel like failures when their baby won’t sleep “the right way”? In this honest and vulnerable conversation, we dive into the guilt, shame, and societal pressure surrounding baby sleep regression and the unrealistic standards parents face.When one of us went through a sudden 15-month toddler sleep regression, she tried every sleep training tip recommended by experts and well-meaning friends. Nothing worked—until car rides became the only solution. But even then, the mom guilt crept in: “Am I a bad mother because I can’t get my baby to sleep without this crutch?”👉 If you’ve ever asked yourself the same thing, this episode is for you.What We Talk About in This Episode:Why baby sleep isn’t a skill to be trained but a biological functionThe emotional toll of sleep regressions on momsReframing “nighttime parenting” as “nighttime nurturing”How questions like “Is your baby sleeping through the night?”  fuel shameBetter ways to support moms during the hardest sleep seasonsInstead of viewing night wakings as failures, we can see them as natural ways our children communicate their needs. Your child isn’t manipulating you; they’re reaching out for comfort—and responding is real parenting work.If you’re a mom struggling with baby sleep, toddler sleep regressions, or just the overwhelming pressure to “get it right,” this episode will remind you: your worth as a parent has nothing to do with how independently your baby sleeps.We’d love to hear your story—email us at [email protected] or share this episode with another tired mama who needs encouragement.Check out the book Molly recommended from our FAV local bookstore! Nurture Revolution by Greer Kirshenbaum, PhDAndAn awesome influence on socials, Brittany Chambers @goodnightmoonchildspeaking of Brittany..... you need to check out her shop. Her shirts are amazing.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Infertility is one of the most painful and isolating experiences a mother can face. In this raw conversation, we share one mom’s journey of turning pain into purpose—and why sharing real motherhood stories matters for building community and healing. Meet Kathleen—craniosacral therapist, licensed massage therapist, breathwork teacher, entrepreneur, founder of Smoke Perfume, and mother to 15-month-old daughter, Pearl—as she navigates a perfect storm of overwhelm. With her husband temporarily incapacitated after breaking both arms, her chronic pain intensifying since childbirth, and the demands of running two businesses, Kathleen offers a raw glimpse into the often invisible struggle of modern motherhood.In this episode:- infertility, egg donors, and oysters- a homebirth transfer and birth date surprise- modern day motherhood overwhelm and communityThis conversation serves as a powerful reminder that behind every mother is a complex story of transformation. Whether you're navigating infertility, birth complications, partner illness, or chronic pain, you're not alone. Sometimes life feels held together by scotch tape and random areas of duct tape—fragile yet somehow functioning. Reach out, find your people, and remember that vulnerability shared becomes strength multiplied.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Why don’t we talk more about the pelvic floor? From postpartum recovery to long-term health, moms are often left in the dark about this essential part of their bodies. In this episode, we break the silence and explore what every mother should know about pelvic floor health. Pelvic health specialist and physical therapist Kirsten Desmarais, PT, DPT, OCS, shares her journey into pelvic health and explains the interconnectedness of our body systems to the pelvic floor. She details common reasons people seek pelvic floor therapy while debunking myths about what's normal versus common.• Kirsten's path to specializing in pelvic health began through working with perinatal patients• The pelvic floor connects to multiple body systems including hips, spine, and visceral organs• Common reasons for seeking pelvic health care include urinary leaking, pain, pressure sensations, and painful periods• Pain with intimacy is an undertreated issue that many people suffer with silently due to shame• The pelvic floor muscles provide stability, control openings, and play a role in intimacy and pleasure• Postpartum incontinence is commonly accepted as normal when it's actually treatable• Barriers to seeking care include resources, time, transportation, and insurance limitations• Pelvic floor function often happens unconsciously, making it easy to disconnect from this area until problems occurYou can find Kirsten through her clinical practice online at empowerorthoandpelvichealth.com or on Instagram at @kirstendesmaraisdptSupport the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Have you ever found yourself spiraling with worry in the middle of the night? You’re not alone. In this vulnerable conversation, we talk about motherhood anxiety, the mental load of moms, and the fears that keep us awake long after our kids are asleep. Hot dogs for dinner (AGAIN), and summer mom chronicles. We discuss the challenges of transitioning to summer with school-aged children and the struggles of early motherhood, particularly around sleep deprivation and nighttime parenting.• Children often struggle with unstructured time after the highly stimulated school environment• The transition to summer routines typically takes about two weeks as kids and parents adjust• Many children develop high expectations for constant entertainment and struggle with "boring" days at home• Nervous system co-regulation between parent and child evolves as children grow• Parents can experience both comfort and anxiety from physical proximity with their children, particularly at bedtime• Nighttime parenting often brings feelings of dread, especially for mothers of infants• Many mothers fantasize about escape scenarios when overwhelmed by sleep deprivation• The endurance test of early motherhood feels particularly difficult because there's no clear end point• When we feel like we can't go on, we have to either surrender to the process or maintain hope that things will improve soon• Most mothers experience a gradual shift toward easier days, though the timeline varies for each familyIf you enjoyed this episode, please share it with other mamas, subscribe to our podcast and leave us a review. Remember, when you're feeling alone, you still belong.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Perinatal mental health struggles like postpartum depression and anxiety impact far more moms than we realize. In this powerful interview we discuss the stigma, the silence, and the support moms deserve but rarely get. Perinatal mental health specialist Celleste Schnellbach, MS, LMFT, PMH-C of Duluth Perinatal joins us to break down the realities of maternal mental health challenges, offering both professional expertise and personal experience as a survivor of postpartum OCD. She is also the Vice Chair for Pregnancy Postpartum Support International - MN Chapter! • Celleste shares her personal journey with postpartum OCD, including terrifying intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors• Perinatal mental health encompasses conditions during pregnancy, post-loss, or the year postpartum• Common diagnoses include depression, anxiety, OCD, bipolar disorders, birth trauma/PTSD, and psychosis• The threshold for seeking help should be "whenever something feels off" – you don't need to be suffering to deserve support• Bringing babies to therapy is not only possible but provides valuable clinical information...don't let that be the barrier to accessing therapy if you need support• Managing nervous system regulation includes identifying whether you're in hyper-arousal (fight or flight) or hypo-arousal (freeze) states• Repair after dysregulation is crucial – it's not about perfect parenting but how you reconnect after difficult moments with your kids• Self-judgment and "shoulds" can prevent mothers from seeking the help they deserveLooking for support for perinatal mental health concerns? Start here.For MN specific support, click here.Would you like to see Celleste as a patient at Duluth Perinatal? Find out more here.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Parenting conversations often leave fathers out—but dads belong too. In this episode, Phil Desmarais and Chad Hilgenberg share their stories of becoming fathers, navigating belonging, and finding their voice in the journey of parenting alongside moms. Phil Desmarais is the Director of Performance at Excel North Physical Therapy and Performance in Duluth, MN. Chad Hilgenberg is a general contractor and carpenter, and is the owner of Hilgenberg Construction LLC in Duluth, MN. Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Motherhood doesn’t exist in a vacuum—it’s deeply tied to politics, policies, and cultural expectations. In this episode, we explore why motherhood is political, how moms can find their voice, and why speaking up matters for ourselves and our communities. In this thought-provoking and timely episode, we briefly explore the intricate relationship between motherhood and the current socio-political landscape. We reflect on the internal conflicts faced by mothers as we care for our families amidst a world filled with distressing events. Emphasizing the importance of open dialogue, we challenge the tendency to overlook the emotional burdens we carry and the impact of societal issues on our well-being.We address the silence surrounding significant societal challenges and how it often stems from a lack of direct experience. We encourage mothers to acknowledge that privilege should not hinder our responsibility to speak up against injustice. And, acknowledge some of the reasons why staying silent may be easier for many. Through introspection, we highlight the need to find our voices and confront oppressive systems, reminding us that motherhood is inherently political. We conclude with a call to action: by embracing our power and resisting silence, we can drive meaningful change for ourselves and our communities.Here are some resources related to the content of this episode:Motherwhelmed by Beth Berry - a book addressing the overculture, mother role, and many deeply rooted things that can influence silence and/or action.Never called your reps before? This will make it SUPER easy 5 Calls app Chamber of Mothers - a non-partisan group focused on empowering moms in advocacy for paid leave, affordable childcare, and maternal health.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

What does “nervous system regulation” even mean when you’re a mom pulled in a million directions? We unpack the buzzword, talk about overstimulation, stress, and what finding calm looks like in the middle of messy, real-life motherhood. Hint: Is it really regulating or is it us policing ourselves? Our discussion begins with a candid reflection on exhaustion and coping methods, transitioning into the pressures society places on mothers in relationship to their ability to “regulate”. We, then, confront the disparity between curated social media portrayals of parenting and the often chaotic reality, emphasizing the need for support and understanding (and for unfollowing unhelpful accounts).Delving into practical strategies for managing overstimulation, we offer insights on creating a more manageable environment and grounding exercises. We identify that these are simply tools to bring us back into a place where we can be present while knowing that this may not be possible for us at times. We also address the stigma surrounding seeking help, highlighting the necessity of compassion and self-care. Concluding with actionable tips, we encourage listeners to integrate personal coping mechanisms into their routines in order to see what works for them, reminding them that “regulation” isn’t the end goal, utilizing tools and seeking centeredness/groundedness while embracing life's chaos is a continuous journey.We hope our stories and ideas resonate with you and your own struggles with dysregulation, sensory overload, and the “shoulds” around the topic of the nervous system. Here are some resources you might find useful!Ambient music - environmental shift to ground yourself during times of sensory overloadNeed a little more or different support with the auditory overload of motherhood?? Here is an option for noise reducing ear buds Loops - NOT an affiliate Pregnancy Postpartum Support International - Perinatal mental health resources including support groups, registry of providers, and so much more (your state may have their own resources too! MN is Pregnancy Postpartum Support MN)Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website

Welcome to Mama You Belong—a podcast about the real, messy, and beautiful journey of matrescence. In our first episode, we share our own stories, why we started this podcast, and how we hope to build a community where every mom feels she belongs. Kirsten, a physical therapist and birth doula shares her personal experiences with perinatal mental health challenges, including the impact of a traumatic pregnancy loss and parenting a neurodivergent child.  Molly, a mental health therapist, offers insights from her journey through infertility and the realities of postpartum life. We discuss the concept of matrescence, acknowledging the transformational and often tumultuous nature of becoming a mother. (Read the book on matresence with us for future episodes) Our candid conversation aims to illuminate the feelings of inadequacy many mothers face when fitting into societal expectations and to foster a sense of belonging within our community. Through shared stories and expert insights, we seek to empower mothers by creating a supportive space for connection and understanding in their unique journeys.Support the showKirsten's Physical Therapy websiteThe Nuture CollectiveMama You Belong InstagramKirsten's Instagram Molly's InstagramMolly’s music Sister Veery on bandcampMolly’s music website