Sila Connections

There are numerous Prophetic teachings (ahadith) that emphasize the duty of spouses to fulfill each other’s intimate needs. When taken together, what the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught us about this matter is sensitive, comprehensive, and extremely helpful in preserving the sanctity of marriage and the feeling of tender care (mawadda and rahma (Q 30:21)) that is so important in a marital relationship.The Prophet ﷺ has taught us, taking care of this need of the spouse is a very critical part of one’s religious practice.Hadith 1: The Prophet ﷺ established a bond between Salman and Abu al-Darda'. Salman paid a visit to Abu al-Darda and found Um al-Darda' dressed in shabby clothes and asked her why she was in that state. She replied, "Your brother Abu al-Darda is not interested in the luxuries of this world." In the meantime, Abu al-Darda came and prepared a meal for Salman, and said to him, "Eat for I am fasting." Salman said, "I am not going to eat, unless you eat." So Abu al-Darda' ate. When it was night, Abu al-Darda' got up night/tahajjud prayer. Salman said , "Sleep," and he slept. Again Abu al-Darda' got up for the prayer, and Salman said , "Sleep." When it was the last part of the night, Salman said to him, "Get up now (for the prayer)." So both of them offered their prayers and Salman said to Abu al-Darda', "Your Lord has a right over you; and your soul has a right over you; and your family has a right over you; so you should give the rights of all those who have a right over you.” Later Abu al-Darda' visited the Prophet ﷺ and mentioned [what had transpired] to him. The Prophet ﷺ  said, "Salman has spoken the truth." (Bukhari 6139)Hadith 2: In a hadith reported by Abu Dharr, the Messenger ﷺ said: “In man's sexual intercourse (with his wife), there is a Sadaqa.” They (the Companions) said: “Messenger of Allah, is there reward for him who satisfies his sexual passion among us?” He said: “Tell me, if he were to devote it to something forbidden, would it not be a sin on his part? Similarly, if he were to devote it to something lawful, he should have a reward.” (Muslim)Hadith 3: Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “If a man calls his wife to bed and she refuses and he spends the night angry with her, the angels will curse her until the morning.” (Bukhari and Muslim)Hadith 4: Jabir reported that Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zainab, as she was tanning a leather and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.” (Muslim)TEXT IN FOCUS:The Prophet ﷺ established a bond of brotherhood between Salman and Abu al-Darda'. Salman paid a visit to Abu al-Darda and found Um al-Darda' dressed in shabby clothes and asked her why she was in that state. She replied, "Your brother Abu al-Darda is not interested in the luxuries of this world." In the meantime, Abu al-Darda came and prepared a meal for him (Salman), and said to him, "(Please) eat for I am fasting." Salman said, "I am not going to eat, unless you eat." So Abu al-Darda' ate. When it was night, Abu al-Darda' got up (for the night/tahajjud prayer). Salman said (to him), "Sleep," and he slept. Again Abu al-Darda' got up (for the prayer), and Salman said (to him), "Sleep." When it was the last part of the night, Salman said to him, "Get up now (for the prayer)." So both of them offered their prayers and Salman said to Abu al-Darda', "Your Lord has a right over you; and your soul has a right over you; and your family has a right over you; so you should give the rights of all those who have a right over you.” Later Abu al-Darda' visited the Prophet ﷺ and mentioned [what had transpired]. The Prophet ﷺ  said, "Salman has spoken the truth." (Bukhari 6139) JOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

We should give charity and do good for others for their sake. That is from spiritual excellence (ihsan)—to want for your brother what you want for yourself. But not everyone can live up to that high level of ethics. For those who cannot, there is still Prophetic guidance that compels one to do good in the world. If I do good or avoid harming others only for the sake of my own benefit in the Afterlife, that also counts as a commendable action in Islam.This episode unpacks the Prophetic roadmap toward ethical living contained in the following hadith:Abu Musa reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Charity is a duty upon every Muslim.” They said, “What if he has nothing?” The Prophet said, “Then he should work with his hands to benefit himself and give in charity.” They said, “What if he cannot do so [out of inability or laziness]?” The Prophet said, “Then he should help a depressed, needy person.” They said, “What if he cannot do so?” The Prophet said, “Then he should enjoin goodness and virtue.” They said, “What if he cannot do so?” The Prophet said, “Then he should refrain from evil, for that will be his charity.”Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6022, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 1008 This hadith makes it a requirement on every believer to give sadaqa, or charity, on a regular basis. But if one is unable to give money, he is taught to do whatever else he can for the people around him: by helping them out in a non-monetary way, or by encouraging them toward good acts, or, at the very least, by refraining from harming them. According to this hadith, simply stopping oneself from doing evil becomes an act of charity!In this episode, Dr. Fareeha Khan and Syeda Fatima Quadri unpack how easy the Prophetic teaching makes it for people to live ethically in our world. To live ethically, one doesn’t necessarily have to live off the grid, shop only locally, or aim to make justice prevail all on one’s own. This teaching shows that positive ethical contribution is attainable for everyone, not just those who have a high moral drive.TEXT IN FOCUS:Abu Musa reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Charity is a duty upon every Muslim.” They said, “What if he has nothing?” The Prophet said, “Then he should work with his hands to benefit himself and give in charity.” They said, “What if he cannot do so [out of inability or laziness]?” The Prophet said, “Then he should help a depressed, needy person.” They said, “What if he cannot do so?” The Prophet said, “Then he should enjoin goodness and virtue.” They said, “What if he cannot do so?” The Prophet said, “Then he should refrain from evil, for that will be his charity.”(Bukhari and Muslim)TAGS:#sadaqa#prophetic-teachings#islamic-charity#dr-fareeha-khan#silaJOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

“I’d rather be understood than forgiven” is an unusual sentiment, but one that many modern people can relate to. Forgiveness as a concept and as an aspiration has lost its allure in contemporary society. However, in more religious societies of the past, it was an obvious thing to aspire toward.Unfortunately, when we do not see forgiveness as a moral value in society, our relationships with each other become weak. What would be the reason to forgive someone who harms you, when you can’t see how your relationship fits into the bigger picture of human society and human existence? If I know that I am weak and make mistakes and need God’s forgiveness, then I will be much more able to forgive someone else when they do wrong to me. But if I don’t recognize my own human weakness—and that I am eventually going to answer to God myself—then it becomes very hard for me to see any reason to overlook someone else’s wrongdoing.To be able to forgive, one must personally have the desire to be forgiven themselves. As we see in the famous story of “Ifk” in the sirah, where our Mother Sayyida Aisha was falsely accused of a horrendous sin, the greatest figures of Islamic history were able to forgive some of the worst transgressions, because they recognized the weakness of their own humanity, and how much they themselves were in need of Allah’s forgiveness and favor. It was after this incident that Allah told us: “But let them pardon, and pay no mind to the slight: Would you not all love Allah to forgive you? And Allah is all-forgiving, all-compassionate” (Quran, Surah al-Nur, 24:22).Another thing that helps us forgive and overlook each other’s mistakes is having a common set of rules for what is right and wrong. We are losing sight in modern society of a shared moral standard. With no shared rules, our society is hurling toward greater immorality, but because we don’t agree on what is right and wrong, when a transgression does occur, we are less able to agree on the fact that something wrong has happened. If we can’t even agree that wrongdoing has occurred, the seeking and giving of forgiveness become even more remote.This episode invites us to consider the great value of forgiving others for the sake of Allah. As a prerequisite to this, it also asks us to consider rebuilding within and among ourselves a shared sense of morality, so that we as Muslims maintain a clear idea of what kinds of wrongs should be forgiven and why. By rekindling a desire to repair and maintain our bonds with each other for a higher purpose, we can help our families and societies become healthier on many levels: emotionally, spiritually, and in the practical aspects of our daily lives.TEXT IN FOCUS:وَلْيَعْفُوا۟ وَلْيَصْفَحُوٓا۟ أَلَا تُحِبُّونَ أَن يَغْفِرَ ٱللَّهُ لَكُمْ وَٱللَّهُ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ “But let them pardon, and pay no mind to the slight:Would you not all love Allah to forgive you?And Allah is all-forgiving,all- compassionate.”Quran, Surah al-Nur, 24:22TAGS:JOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

Having to care for kids, to cook and feed everyone their iftar and suhur meals, and then not being able to pray and fast during the days of menstruation…These factors lead some women to feel as if they are missing the blessings and benefits of Ramadan. The idea that women simply cannot catch up with men is so engrained in the modern Western mind that some modernist type Muslim activists will even encourage menstruating women to pray and fast in Ramadan if they feel up to it. The idea is that women can take charge of their Ramadan schedule on their own terms and not be compelled to miss out on anything that men are able to take part in.In this episode, we talk about the fact that the worship of Ramadan is defined not by men or women’s standards, but by Allah’s standards. As we see in the hadith of the Prophet ﷺ, “Whoever fasts Ramadan, out of faith (iman) and expecting reward (ihtisaban), will have his previous sins forgiven” (Bukhari, 38). The phrase “out of faith and expecting reward” is a key condition here. As a commentator on the hadith explains, this phrase means that one should fast in Ramadan: “1) out of belief in the command to do so, 2) knowing its obligation, 3) fearing the punishment for neglecting it, and 4) and hoping for the great reward of fasting.” The commentator goes on to explain that “these are the characteristics of a believer, i.e. one who has iman” (المرادُ مَن صامه تصديقًا بالأمرِ به، عالِمًا بوجوبِه، خائفًا مِن عقابِ تركِه، محتسِبًا جزيلَ الأجرِ في صومِه، وهذه صفةُ المؤمِنِ al-Durar al-Saniyya).What does this hadith then tell us about women and how they feel about the fasting and all the other work they do during Ramadan? The main point is: do it for Allah, and you will not be disappointed. We simply need to turn our focus toward the fact that it is Allah who has blessed Ramadan, and it is He who will recompense every Muslim according to their degree of striving. In this way, the tediousness of cooking and feeding, and even the ritually preventative nature of menstruation end up having great positive value in the life and worship of a believing woman.This episode references Ustadha Sadaf Khan Ahmad’s article on women’s worship in Ramadan, available soon on the Sila Initiative’s website (thesilainitiative.org).TEXT IN FOCUS:عَنْ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ عَوْفٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِنَّ رَمَضَانَ شَهْرٌ افْتَرَضَ اللَّهُ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ صِيَامَهُ وَإِنِّي سَنَنْتُ لِلْمُسْلِمِينَ قِيَامَهُ فَمَنْ صَامَهُ إِيمَانًا وَاحْتِسَابًا خَرَجَ مِنْ الذُّنُوبِ كَيَوْمِ وَلَدَتْهُ أُمُّهُAbdur Rahman ibn Awf reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Ramadan is a month in which Allah Almighty has obligated its fasting. I have instituted for Muslims the practice of prayer at night. Thus, whoever fasts it with faith and expecting reward will be rid of sins like the day he was born from his mother.”Source: Musnad Aḥmad 1688TAGS:#MenstruationAndRamadan, #WomenAndRamadan, #RamadanBlessings (feel free to edit/change/add)JOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

It’s one thing to accept the rules, but it is another to actually experience how much they work in our favor. As Muslims, it’s important to start off with an Obedience Mindset (as we covered in Episode 11). Once we have that down, the implementation of the rules of the Shariah can bring more and more peace and confidence to one’s heart. This is because one starts to see how Allah Most High really has the best plan for us when He asks us to do certain things, or to refrain from certain things.Experiential knowledge is not the starting point of faith, but it is the means to increased certainty. We see this in the Quranic passage from Surah al-Baqara, when the prophet Ibrahim (peace be upon him) asks Allah, “My Lord, show me how You revive the dead” (2:260). It wasn’t that Ibrahim (peace be upon him) had doubt that Allah could indeed raise the dead; he made his request so that he could be even more convinced of what he already believed in.For modern Muslims like ourselves, some of the hardest commands of Allah for us to fully accept into our hearts are those that are gendered. Rules like “don’t be alone with the opposite sex,” or “don’t travel alone without a mahram,” are not things we easily understand, because the idea of equality and sameness between sexes has been promoted to us as the best thing.So when we experience the benefits that the gendered rulings of the Shariah bring to our lives, that’s when it really settles in. Meaning, we get it, deep down in the core of our being: how wise Allah truly is, how much He loves us, and how much the social rulings of His Deen are truly in our favor.This episode, episode 12 of the CONNECTIONS podcast, builds on the previous episode, and also takes from two specific articles on the Sila Initiative’s website, namely “Being Empowered Through Allah Against Sexual Impropriety and Exploitation” and “Sexual Responsibility and the Fulfillment of Desire.” Listen in to the discussion between Dr. Fareeha Khan and Syeda Fatima Quadri to hear about how much the experience of the Shariah can uplift and enhance one’s iman.TEXT IN FOCUS:(feel free to adjust spacing and line alignment (like if you don’t want the sentences broken up.)وَإِذْ قَالَ إِبْرَٰهِـۧمُ رَبِّ أَرِنِى كَيْفَ تُحْىِ ٱلْمَوْتَىٰ قَالَ أَوَلَمْ تُؤْمِن قَالَ بَلَىٰ وَلَـٰكِن لِّيَطْمَئِنَّ قَلْبِى And recall when Abraham said,‘My Lord, show me how You revive the dead.’He said, ‘Have you not then already long believed?’He said, ‘I certainly have,yet so my heart may be serene in peace.’(Quran, al-Baqara, 2:260)TAGS:#imanboost, #beautifulShariah, #theSilaInitiativeJOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

We use many techniques to motivate children toward positive actions and behaviors. However, when teaching young people to problem solve, we should make an intentional effort to establish ubudiya and train a child to make their intentions for Allah.  Knowing the practical benefits of our actions is helpful for young people. And understanding how our good deeds benefit others is a motivating factor. But establishing obedience at the onset makes a difference in how we are at our core, and creates a thought process that is beneficial throughout life.  In this episode, Fatima Quadri leads us to consider the beauty of putting Allah at the forefront of our minds from a young age.#IntentionalParenting #IslamicParenting #RaisingMuslimYouth #YouthDevelopment #Tarbiya #Ubudiyah #SincereIntentions #ParentingWithPurpose #FaithCenteredParenting #IslamicEducation #MoralDevelopment #RaisingRighteousChildren #MindfulParenting #YoungMuslims #SeekAllahsPleasure #NiyyahMatters #MuslimPodcast #ParentingPodcast #FaithAndFamily #SpiritualGrowth

“La yukallif Allah illa wus‘aha.” We won’t be burdened with religious duties that are too much for us to bear. Allah Most High has promised us that in the Quran. But sometimes our duties at home and within our families become too much, and those are religious duties too! Maybe it’s just juggling all the tasks needed to raise one’s kids right, or the harder challenge of staying in a bad marriage…If things are seeming just too hard to bear, what are we supposed to do?This episode discusses an important and often unrecognized principle. Since Allah has promised that He will not make you responsible for more duties than you can handle, and you are in a place where you can’t handle it anymore, it means there is a religiously acceptable alternative to your situation that you need to seek out and put into action.TEXT IN FOCUS:لَا يُكَلِّفُ ٱللَّهُ نَفْسًا إِلَّا وُسْعَهَا“Allah does not tax any soul but what it can bear”(Quran, 2:286)TAGS:Being Responsible; Relationships; Seeking Advice; Taking On Too MuchJOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

Family, society and relationships are fundamentally determined by how we think about sexuality. When we change the way we think about the sexual aspect of the human being, it affects how we think about marriage, gender roles, and a host of other critically important social institutions.Due to its religious and political history, Western civilization only allows for one moral extreme or the other regarding sexuality: total abstinence or total indulgence. The abstinent, pro-celibacy stance of Christianity was the reason why Europeans historically always criticized the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ for being married and for his “love of women.” On the other hand, the sexual freedom of the contemporary West cannot accept the divine rules for appropriate sexuality that the Prophet embodied.In the midst of these extreme perspectives, modern Muslims must realize what a great blessing we have in the sexual model set for us by the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. He was not abstinent, nor did he objectify women. His fulfillment of human sexual need was in perfect alignment with the highest spiritual potential of the human being. The Prophetic model regarding human desire is the ultimate antidote to the confusion and imbalance we face today regarding sexuality.  This episode of the CONNECTIONS podcast discusses the contemporary relevance of the Prophet’s love of women, with specific reference to Dr. Fareeha Khan’s article “Sexual Responsibility and the Fulfillment of Desire” (available at thesilainitiative.org).TEXT IN FOCUS:“[Two] have been made beloved to me from this world of yours: women and perfume. And my true delight was made to be the Ritual Prayer.” (al-Nasa’i)TAGS:#SexualResponsibility, #IslamicSexuality, #theProphetsWives, #taqwa, #IslamAndWomen, #MuslimMasculinityJOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

It’s common to feel overwhelmed by the sheer number of things we carry on our plate. Surprisingly, a major source of simplification is a simple trick of the mind. When we shift focus, by making Jannah our goal and the Shariah our standard for personal assessment, things become a lot easier.TEXT IN FOCUS:أوجب عليك خدمته، وما أوجب عليك إلا دخول جنته“He has made obligatory for you His service. And he has not obligated anything for you except to enter His Paradise.” (ibn ‘Ata illah)TIMESTAMPS (AI generated):[to be aded]TAGS:#Jannah; #personal development; #moral compass; #Islamic guidance; #reaching Paradise; #heavenly pleasures; #life knacksJOIN USthesilainitiative.org⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

There’s a lot of confusion and talk regarding masculinity these days. In Islam, masculinity is tied strongly to a man’s spending. There are Islamic guidelines for what and how a man should spend, and upon what and whom he should spend it. Doing it right makes him a man of real worth. With women claiming independence, and with religious practice becoming rigidly defined, it is harder for men to see a clear role for themselves as contributing members of society and family life. In this episode, we turn the conversation back to how important the spending of men is for the building of healthy individuals, families, and societies. TEXT IN FOCUS: “O son of Adam! Verily [the thing you should know about yourself is that] to spend on others [for the sake of Allah] is better for you, and to hold it is worse for you. You won’t be blamed for [holding onto what is] just enough. And begin in your charity with those you are responsible for to support. And the upper hand is superior to the lower hand.” (Muslim) TIMESTAMPS:2:25 The hadith on spending and withholding wealth4:10 The sins of not spending8:05 Using intention to make your spending count9:46 The special role of man as breadwinner11:47 The leader is the one who spends12:18 Spending incurs loyalty13:50 Holding onto “just enough” wealth16:20 Ordering one’s spending priorities18:02 Spending one’s wealth, time, life on others19:54 Is it wrong for women to earn and spend?22:41 Islam respects class difference26:22 Woman accepting the man’s financial planning28:31 Women being pushed to earn29:49 Today’s two income dilemma31:17 The subtle marital harms of poor financial planning32:55 Concrete aspects of proper planning and spending33:46 The spending of men’s time on kids34:47 The ability to spend more36:09 Receiving with obedience40:02 Marital agreement on making big money40:38 Hidden dangers to family iman in the mad pursuit of dunyaTAGS: Muslim masculinity, Islamic marriage, men as leaders, financial planning, raising kids

The rulings regarding inheritance within the Shariah are fixed and clear, but few Muslims today follow them. In this episode, we reflect on how the inheritance laws of Islam help keep families together, even after death.TEXT IN FOCUS:Narrated Sa'd bin Abi Waqqas (RA):The Prophet ﷺ  came to visit me in my sick illness in the year of the Final, Farewell Pilgrimage when the illness was intense [such that I thought I would die from it]. So I said, O Messenger of Allah, The pain has reached the degree that you can see on me, and I possess wealth. And nobody is my heir except my daughter. Shall I give two-thirds of my wealth away in charity? He said: No. A half? He said: No. Then he said, “[Give away] a third, and a third is a lot. For you to leave your heirs after you enriched and not in need is better than to leave them soliciting alms with their hands from other people. You don’t spend any expenditure by which you seek the Favor of Allah, save that you will have a reward for it, even [a morsel] you put in the mouth of your wife.Hadith related in BukhariTIMESTAMPS:0:00 Introduction0:33 Hadith of Sa’d bin Abi Waqqas3:40 Inheritance rules are fixed6:00 Weird inheritance case of Hollywood actor11:30 Inheritance laws differ across the US12:25 The impartiality of the Shariah14:10 Fixed shares and the one-third wasiyya16:05 Sinful to not follow Quranic inheritance shares17:35 Inheritance as Social Glue19:15 Receiving money softens the heart20:32 Your kin matters23:00 Supporting your family is sadaqa26:10 Gender and inheritance shares29:58 Daughters get half of sons32:00 Men falling short on duty34:00 Men who fulfill their duty38:25 Training sons from a young age44:20 Seek out sources to do inheritance rightTags:Islamic inheritancefamily bondsSadaqa

DESCRIPTION:Life is complicated enough as it is. Today’s emphasis on finding the “real You” just makes things even more stressful. Alhamdulillah as Muslims, we have a Prophetic legacy to rely on that gives us direction and helps us find meaning in even life’s most mundane tasks. By finding purpose beyond ourselves, we find relief and fulfillment, even when times look tough.TEXT IN FOCUS:عن كعب بن عُجرَةَ رضي الله عنه قال: قال رسول الله ﷺ :يَا كَعْبُ بن عُجرَةَ إِنَّهُ لَا يَدْخُلُ الْجَنَّةَ لَحْمٌ وَلَا دَمٌ نَبَتَا على سُحْتٍ، النَّارُ أَوْلَى بِهِ، يَا كَعْبُ بن عُجرَةَ، النَّاسُ غَادِيَانِ، غَادٍ فِى فَكاكِ نَفسِهِ فَمُعْتِقُهَا، وَغَادٍ فَمُوبقُهَا، يَا كَعْبُ بن عُجرَةَ، الصَّلَاةُ قُربانٌ، وَالصَّوْمُ جُنَّةٌ، وَالصَّدَقَةُ تُطفِئُ الْخَطِيئَةَ كَمَا يَذْهَبُ الْجَليدُ عَلَى الصَّفَاأخرجه ابن حبان في صحيحهOn the authority of Ka`b ibn `Ujra, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ  said, “O Ka`b ibn `Ujra: Flesh or blood that has grown on ill-gotten gain shall not enter the Garden. The Fire is more worthy of it. O Ka`b ibn `Ujra: All people set forth anew in the morn as either one of two types. One, in search of ransoming his self, sets it free [from the Fire], while the other destroys it. O Ka`b ibn `Ujra: Prayer is an offering to Allah, fasting is a shield, and charity puts out a misdeed just as snow disappears on rock.”Hadith related in Sahih Ibn Hibban, featured in Sila’s Legacies series on InstagramTIMESTAMPS:02:00 What is a ghadi?03:50 The desire to be unique05:00 Early morning construction workers07:50 Living among Muslims gives a sense of purpose9:45 What is your driving force?11:30 You’re not as free as you think13:45 True liberation15:00 The wondrous state of the believer18:00 Postmodernism and the individualization of meaning20:00 From confidence to incoherence22:10 Can male ulama understand women’s concerns?24:30 Why we distrust religious authority27:17 Eastern Muslim attraction to Western individualism28:44 The perspectival advantage of American Muslims30:55 Unified in purpose; diverse in form32:50 The only real need of the human being34:00 Unified purpose as antidote to contemporary anxiety#intention#postmodernism,#purpose of life

This episode offers the phrase “sexual responsibility” as a value-affirming alternative to the trending phrase “spiritual abuse.” When a community uses the phrase “sexual responsibility” to affirm that it upholds appropriate, Godconscious behavior for itself and its community members, it sends a statement that is clear, positive, and self-confident. On the other hand, when the phrase “spiritual abuse” is used, it indicates a defensive stance that begins and ends with under-confidence in our religious scholars, and ultimately in ourselves as a community. If our aim is to communicate our values regarding how men in positions of religious authority should act, we should do so in a way that does not indirectly call into question men and authority figures more generally.TEXT IN FOCUS:“Having such a culture of taqwa engrained into the practice of Islam in America would help the male scholars do right just as it would help women. There are, in fact, many ‘ulama in America who do take measures of taqwa when teaching and interacting with their female students...What is unfortunate, however, is that these measures do not match up with the current religious atmosphere in America. The ‘ulama are labeled as unaccommodating or extremist if they ask for such protective measures to be taken. We have to realize though that if such taqwa-centered practices are normalized, and are instituted from a place of wanting to please Allah, then everyone in the community will feel more confident to act according to the laws of God and to stand up for these laws when they are being violated.” –Khan, Fareeha, “Reconnecting with Our Scholars Upon the Plain of Taqwa,”

Loneliness plagues a lot of people today, and our social habits aren’t helping. But a good social life starts with the simplest steps. This episode focuses in on four, almost-too-simple-looking, tips for how to build a healthier social existence. When these prophetic tips are implemented, they help both the individual and the collective society get healthy and stay strong—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. TEXT IN FOCUS:أفشِ السَّلامَ،وأطعِمِ الطَّعامَ، وصِلِ الأرحامَ، وقُمْ باللَّيلِ والنّاسُ نيامٌ، وادخُلِالجنَّةَ بِسَلامٍ“Spread the greetings of peace, feed people, maintain ties of kinship, stand in prayer at night while others sleep, and enter Jannah thereby in peace.”– hadith related by Ahmad, to be featured in Sila’s Legacies series on InstagramTIMESTAMPS (AI generated, may have inconsistencies):[1:31] The four actions to enter Jannah mentioned in the hadith: giving salam, feeding people, maintaining kinship, and praying at night.[4:01] The importance of human (not virtual) interaction [6:31] The social structure in the hadith, from general greetings to more intimate family connections.[9:01] The significance of giving salam and its impact on social interactions.[12:01] Personal anecdotes about the power of salam in different contexts.[15:01] The role of feeding people in building community and maintaining relationships.[18:01] Challenges of hosting and feeding in modern times, especially for women.[21:01] The importance of simplicity and intention in hosting and maintaining social ties.[24:01] The role of family involvement in social gatherings and the benefits of including children.[27:01] The impact of social gatherings on community building and reducing loneliness.[30:01] The connection between social actions and personal worship.[33:01] Reflection on the hadith as a guide for social and spiritual practices.Tags:#loneliness #healthy_societies #social_SunnahsJoin Us⁠Telegram⁠⁠Youtube

This episode explores societal perceptions of aging, focusing on cultural differences between Western and Islamic perspectives. Key topics include the role of women as they age, the concept of khidma in Islamic culture, and the spiritual significance of aging. It also examines the impact of individualism on family dynamics and the challenges of self-reliance in old age.TEXT IN FOCUS:You have let yourself go. Youhave not refused the yearspolitely, firmly like an anorexicat a dinner party.(from “I Met A Woman Who Wasn’t There,” by Marge Piercy)TIMESTAMPS (AI generated, may have inconsistencies):[0:31]: Poem highlighting the unrealistic expectations placed on aging women[5:01] Western cultures emphasize youth and independence[10:01] Valorization of independence conflicts with the natural process of aging[12:00] The benefit of knowing old people [15:01] Khidma (service) brings about beauty and connection; the lack of this experience can affect one's perception of aging.[20:01] A spiritual perspective on aging [25:01 ] The impact of capitalism on family and agingTags:#aging #independence #khidmaJoin UsTelegramYoutube

This episode explores the role of emotional intelligence and vulnerability in marital relationships, using examples from the life of the Prophet Muhammad. Key topics include the balance of tenderness and firmness, the concept of 'Naz,' and the impact of modern individualism on vulnerability. The discussion emphasizes the importance of creating a safe space in relationships and the role of gratitude, respect, and affection in marriage. It also highlights the cultural transmission of behavior and the significance of role models in teaching appropriate gender behavior and social obligations. 00:00 - Introduction 01:30 - Headache hadith 05:00 - Aisha's vulnerability 10:00 - Concept of "Naz" (Urdu) 15:00 - Importance of emotional vulnerability 20:00 - The Prophet's ﷺ masculine response 25:00 - The Prophet ﷺ as husband 30:00 - Importance of role models 35:00 - Significance of social connections 40:00 - The richness of the Sunnah thesilainitiative.org