The Colonel Radioshow

What's behind the curtain? Rupert Murdoch, Alan Sugar, Buck Rogers, Rat pies and Foreskins

Lurking Left-wing Scrumpers, Cliff's humiliating first summer holiday, accidental cock squeezing, ripping down the wallpaper and finding hammers up the harris

In bed with Aleister Crowley... clacking clackers... leathery balls... stem cell testing on Dickie Davis...

Dogs and dark forces... Westminster peadophiles... Pills, thrills and Leon Brittan's lapels

Haggis mocking and Scottish Stockholm syndrome, Cameron's Savile Row sentinels... plus Ronnie and Reggie Kray discuss periphery touching

Ballooning with Stephen Fry, digging holes with Omar Sharif, showering with Nigel Farage, beheading with the Borgias and much, much more

Pickled testicles, wastes of spaces, Holly Willoughby, exposed flesh, Andy Warhol, breakdancing and avoiding the madness

The sartorial shortcomings of Hare Krishna. Taking a fence with Warwick Davis and Kenny Baker, going on about Star Wars and the Krays cutting up Eastenders

The Colonel and Sage return with Heather Mills' missing leg, Farage, Judo, sexual malformities, one finger techniques, kippers, the late Bob Hoskins and Moses

The secret crimes of David Hasselhoff, health and safety tips for Neil Young, the shady history of David Cameron's ancestors and the Colonel's bladder problems

The Colonel, Sage and Ronnie return with the first new episode of 2014 - metaphoric kipper ties, Showaddywaddy, the true story of the Titanic and Sage's disreputable mother all on the table of discussion today

The Colonel, Sage and Ronnie mull over the issues of the day including Broadmoor games with Peter Sutcliffe, wrestling with Richard Harris and weapons of mass destruction

The colonel and Sage discuss the working classes, leaky Tories, World War buggery and the insightful proclamations of the cook Jamie Oliver

The Colonel and Sage return with the Loon Goon in the studio - an Irish revolutionary who witnessed Theresa May boiling immigrant children cackling with a salivating Eric Pickles sat at the table waiting for his din dins

Fun and games with the Colonel and Sage

But uncle Thomas Does!

Slip Em a Fiver And Ask Em To Do a Favour

The strange disappearance of the Colonel's wife, The Parker pen thermometer, The Red Baron and tight pockets

Wow, the Colonel and Sage return, Scottish bottoms, David Icke and Wogan's elbows, burning Volkswagens, padeophile Priests and Roger Whittaker

Etheral nature of existence, teddy boys, powdered milk, fish farming, mud men and also some spunk

Zionists, cockney mars bars, limericks and guess the smell with The King of the Bohemians - Iron Foot Jack

Lonnie Donegan's baton, chocolatiering fat bastards, strange DIY, Litvinenko and the Scientologists, what happens under the arches in Vauxhall...

Getting rid of prostitutes, necrophilia, Barack Obama, General Custer, Robbie Williams and much much more

New episode with the Colonel, Sage and the team... Turkish baths, Jimmy Savile Row, Thatcher's sweet shop and Nobby the fisherman

Colonel and Sage discuss the burning issues of the day including James Bond, Royal tits, compassionate robocops, brain draining and the grab, the grab

The Colonel and Sage are back back back with a new series... itchy bottoms... Boris the cyclist... Lord Coe... but is it art?

Last in the series... What happened to Prince Philip's testicles during the Jubilee?... The Colonel gets in trouble with the Royals...

Thumbs up with the Fonz, Louis Walsh and sexual health, Pam Ayres, gay ebay, boiling piss, colour, light and stabbing in the dark

Who killed Rober Kennedy? Who is God's dentist? And this summer's narcotic Olympics

Party time for Sage and the Colonel... Doing business with dwarves, Brando's favourite biscuits and Ron shifts a paradigm with a knife.

Episode 149 with Sage and the Colonel - How do you do what you do to me? Suck it and see!

Swinging England, Brian Jones and the otherlightweights, David Walliams in the Thames, redheads and the Royals, Cheggers in the trenches

Men together in the Poplar Vapour Rooms... Pressing trousers... Lord Lucan... glory holes... the Colonel's outrageous plan on how to keep the Falklands safe... all finished off with some toilet trouble

Crabtree and Sage return with a new series! A journey into the darkness... Georgie Fame, Water Buffalo, homeless people, Rita Marley, ginormous erections, the Hallal pill crusade

Pre series special - Woggle Madness and Clutch Problems

Who is the Colonel's famous long lost great grandchild? Are Terry's better than Dirk's? What did Crabtree do to Mrs Haversham? Last in the series

Psychedelic exploring... up the Amazon in a dress... coming serpents... Claire Sweeney salivating in Jack boots... on being Anne Frank one evening 1945, with just her sister at her side... the horror! the horror!

Experimenting with polar bears, cous cous, Mick McCarthy, revolution

Midseries special from the Colonel and Sage

Festive fun with the Colonel's Christmas Special - Ebony and Ivory all in it together... doing it for the kids

The Colonel recounts time spent with Aleister Crowley. The dark arts, ducks, leather pants, Mike Yarwood and other satantic stuff and nonsense

We discover various high profile 'indiscretions' by the Colonel that links him with some of the most historical assissinationsof the 20th Century. In addition, a Scotsman is unfortunate.

Twisting with Sage and the Colonel... The despicably evil plan of the great inventor Otis Van Strapon, involving Miranda Hart and falling over. The Chinese, Stacia Blake and Liptons Tea??

Rantsville - Archbishops, big society, the French, David Cameron the shit... the Colonel gets a bit wound up with them all

Who are we? Blaming the wife, getting conned by the YMCA, Ku Klux Klan, inspecting hard drives and fisticuffs with the Angel Gabriel

This week Eva Peron, Muslim knock knock jokes, toffs and cultivating cucumbers

New Series! Sleeping with mothers. Standing and delivering. Anyone for tennis, diving or pool? And getting throttled by the Krays

I predict a riot... Series special with the Colonel, Ronnie Kray and the rest. Arse, skinheads, flagpoles, riots and looting gobstoppers. How to get a job at the BBC and how to hire a chimney sweep. At the end of the day, give them six of the best and have a cup of tea.

The Madame Tassaud’s Scandal, the Colonel’s role in the killing of Osama Bin Laden… what really goes on in the Playboy mansion. The joy of auto asphyxiation. How to make porridge… and how Ted Rogers helped out Al Qaeda

Hello Sailor! Been caught stealing... Compromising photographs of Prince Philip... did she jump or was she pushed? Getting it out in the open... Last in the series