The Pastor’s Studio with Paul Basden

What happens when the house gets quiet, and you’re left rediscovering who you are without the rhythms of raising children? In this episode of This Is My Story, Paul sits down with Rick and Clancy Denton to talk about marriage, parenting, faith, and learning to embrace the empty nest season with intentionality and hope. After spending decades raising two children in a Christ-centered home, Rick and Clancy found themselves facing a new reality: life as just the two of them again. Rather than viewing the empty nest as something to fear, they chose to lean in. Through honest conversation, they share how church community, transparency at home, intentional connection in marriage, and a strong foundation of faith helped prepare both their children—and themselves—for this next chapter. They also discuss the grief, identity shifts, and unexpected joys that come with parenting adult children and learning to let go with grace. Whether you’re years away from an empty nest or already living in one, this episode offers wisdom, encouragement, and practical insight for navigating one of life’s biggest transitions. In This Episode, You’ll Hear: How intentional parenting shapes children long after they leave home Why honesty and transparency mattered in their family culture The importance of prioritizing marriage while raising kids What the “Year of Yes” taught them about the empty nest season The grief and freedom that coexist when children leave home How faith, prayer, and community sustain parents through transition Key Takeaway: The empty nest is not the end of purpose—it’s an invitation into a new season of connection, growth, and joy. Resources & Links: The Loud Quiet Podcast The Loud Quiet Book

What do you do when life doesn’t go the way you planned—and the questions feel bigger than the answers? In this episode, Paul sits down with Jamie Bryson to explore a story marked by faith, doubt, resilience, and an unshakable trust in God. From a late introduction to faith in high school to pursuing a PhD in Hebrew Bible, Jamie’s journey was rooted in a deep desire to understand God and help others do the same. But along the way, things shifted. A season of intellectual questioning led to years of wrestling with belief, identity, and calling. And just as clarity began to return, life took an unexpected turn. In 2021, Jamie was diagnosed with young-onset Parkinson’s and kidney cancer—within the same year. What follows is not a story of easy answers, but of steady faith. In this conversation, Jamie shares what it looks like to keep showing up, to let go of needing certainty, and to trust that God is present—even in suffering. His story is a powerful reminder that faith is not about having everything figured out, but about knowing where to turn when you don’t. In This Episode, You’ll Hear: What it looks like to wrestle honestly with doubt How perspective on suffering reshapes faith The role of community, love, and consistency in hard seasons Why faith can grow stronger, not weaker, in uncertainty You don’t have to have all the answers to have real faith. Sometimes the most powerful faith is simply choosing to stay.

What happens when God doesn’t answer your prayer the way you hoped? After fighting to save their marriage, Matt and Mary Beth believed the hardest chapter was behind them. But then came a diagnosis no parent is prepared for. Their unborn daughter had a fatal condition. No cure. No chance of survival. And they were faced with an unthinkable decision. In Part 2 of their story, Matt and Mary Beth share: Walking through a devastating prenatal diagnosis Choosing to trust God in the face of loss Experiencing grief and joy at the same time Witnessing God’s presence in their darkest season What it looks like to lead, love, and serve from a place of surrender This isn’t just a story about loss. It’s a story about faith in the unknown. Hope in the middle of grief. And a God who is still present — even when the outcome breaks your heart.   References Song: Held by Natalie Grant

What happens when a marriage slowly drifts… and no one realizes how far it’s gone? Matt and Mary Beth Bridges both grew up in church. They knew about God. They believed the right things. They started their marriage with love and good intentions. But underneath the surface, cracks were forming. Distance. Unmet expectations. Lack of communication. And a growing loneliness neither of them knew how to fix. Until everything broke. In Part 1 of this story, Matt and Mary Beth share: Growing up around faith but missing true relationship How ambition, work, and identity pulled them apart The quiet build of resentment in early marriage How loneliness opened the door to betrayal The moment everything began to unravel This isn’t just a story about failure. It’s a story about how marriages don’t collapse overnight — they drift slowly… until something forces them to face the truth. If you’ve ever: Felt distant in your marriage Struggled to communicate what you actually need Watched small frustrations turn into deep hurt Wondered how things got so far off track This conversation is a reminder: What feels small now… can become everything later.

What if the marriage that started with love… still started falling apart? Andy and Summer Butler didn’t come into marriage empty-handed. They brought past pain. Different faith journeys. Blended family complexities. And expectations no relationship could carry. What began as connection quickly revealed deeper issues — control, unmet expectations, communication breakdown, and wounds that hadn’t fully healed. Until everything hit a breaking point. In this episode, Andy and Summer share: Walking through divorce, loss, and personal collapse The challenges of building a blended family When marriage struggles expose deeper personal wounds Learning to put Christ at the center of their marriage How God used their pain to create purpose This isn’t a story about a perfect marriage. It’s a story about learning that love rooted in Christ looks very different than love built on control or expectation. If you’ve ever: Felt the weight of a struggling marriage Navigated the complexity of a blended family Tried to control outcomes instead of surrendering Wondered if your relationship could actually heal This conversation is a reminder: God doesn’t waste brokenness. He rebuilds it into something stronger. References Blended Book Co (Resources & Coaching): https://www.blendedbookco.com/

What if the person who led you to Jesus… was your child? The Wagner family didn’t all come to faith the same way. Catherine’s journey began with curiosity — a friend whose joy didn’t make sense, mission trips that changed her perspective, and a growing desire to truly know Jesus for herself. At the same time, her parents, Robyn and Justin, were living what they call a “check-the-box” faith — showing up occasionally, but never fully engaged. Until one moment changed everything. When they realized their daughter was pursuing Jesus on her own… and they weren’t. This isn’t just a story about finding Jesus. It’s a story about grace showing up in unexpected ways — through a daughter’s faith, a family’s humility, and a God who was pursuing them all along. If you’ve ever: Felt like you were “close” to faith but not fully living it Wondered if it’s too late to start again Been impacted by someone else’s faith journey This conversation is a reminder: God meets us in different ways. But His grace reaches every one of us. References Baptism at Preston Trail: https://prestontrail.org/baptism Luke 1:45 Proverbs 3:5 Ecclesiastes 3:1  

What happens when the life you’ve built starts to quietly fall apart? Ron Daniels’ story is one of success on the outside — and struggle beneath the surface. For years, he carried pressure, expectations, and hidden pain. What began as coping slowly turned into dependence… and eventually, addiction. But even in the lowest moments, God had not stepped away. In this episode, Ron shares: The subtle path from pressure to addiction Living with shame while trying to hold everything together Walking through recovery, sobriety, and rebuilding trust Learning to receive grace instead of performing for it This isn’t a story about hitting rock bottom and instantly fixing everything. It’s a story about honesty. Surrender. And the slow, steady work of healing. If you’ve ever: Felt stuck in a cycle you couldn’t break Carried shame you didn’t know how to name Wondered where God was in your struggle Ron’s story is a reminder: God is not absent in your pain. And it’s never too late to begin again. Read Ron's Reflection here

What happens when faith feels more like performance than relationship? Taylor White grew up in a small Texas town where faith, family, and church were central to life. Saved at eight and raised in a Baptist church, Taylor always tried to do the right things — the right choices, the right behaviors, the right path. But underneath the surface was a deeper struggle. For years, Taylor approached faith like a checklist. Then life began to unravel the formula. In this episode, Taylor shares: The pressure of performance-based faith Building a successful career while wrestling internally Parenting out of fear and control Facing the “end of his rope” when life didn’t go as planned Rediscovering faith through surrender, not striving Taylor’s story is honest, thoughtful, and deeply relatable for anyone who has ever tried to earn God’s approval instead of receiving His grace. Because the journey of faith isn’t about performing perfectly. It’s about learning to trust the Father who has been faithful all along.

What happens when the life you carefully planned suddenly changes? Eunice Nakamura’s story is one of courage, calling, and surrender. At age seven, she immigrated from Korea with her single mother, not speaking English and stepping into an entirely new world. Years later, that same determination led her through Baylor, law school, and a successful legal career, eventually becoming general counsel for major organizations. Then at 40, while serving as legal counsel for one of the world’s largest breast cancer foundations, Eunice received unexpected news: She had breast cancer. In this episode, Eunice shares: Immigrating to the U.S. as a child and adapting to a new culture Discovering that calling is about people, not position Facing a breast cancer diagnosis at the height of her career Experiencing deeper surrender and clarity through suffering Learning to trust God through unexpected career turns Today, Eunice serves as General Counsel for the Texas Rangers, continuing to live out her faith in leadership and influence. Her story is a reminder that even when life goes off script, God is still writing the story. And sometimes the hardest moments become the ones that draw us closest to Him.

What if “forever” didn’t last? Troy and Holly never imagined divorce would be part of their story. Both grew up in strong Christian homes. Both entered marriage believing in forever. Both experienced betrayal, heartbreak, and the painful unraveling of life as they knew it. In this episode, they share: The emotional shock of divorce Wrestling with anger, grief, and unanswered prayers Learning to trust God in loneliness Rebuilding identity after loss Risking marriage again Blending six adult children into one family Turning personal pain into Divorce Care ministry This is a story about divorce — but even more, it’s a story about redemption. If you’re walking through heartbreak, single again, or wondering if it’s too late to love again, this conversation is for you. God does not waste pain. And your story is not over. Resources Divorce Care & Support Ministries: https://prestontrail.churchcenter.com/registrations/events/category/9103 Upcoming Divorce Care Event: https://prestontrail.churchcenter.com/registrations/events/3341584

What if the life you built on your own terms still left you empty? Jarod Taylor grew up in chaos — broken homes, addiction, instability, and learning early that if anything was going to work out, it would be on his terms. God wasn’t someone he hated. God just wasn’t real. Through his teens and 20s, Jarod became his own authority — chasing women, music, nightlife, success, and control. Eventually, he built a strong career, a home, and a family. And still felt hollow. What followed wasn’t a dramatic conversion. It was curiosity. Jarod decided to “try on” Christianity — reading Scripture analytically, wrestling with doubt, logic, science, and reason. Somewhere in the process, he fell in love with Jesus. If you’ve ever: Lived life on your own terms Believed faith and logic were opposites Felt spiritually numb or hardened Wanted proof before belief Jarod’s story is a reminder: You don’t need all the answers. You just need an open heart.   Connect with Jarod

What if the faith you thought you had wasn’t the same as surrender? Jason Kanapkey grew up in church. Baptized at eight. Knew the language. Believed in Jesus. But by 12, he was experimenting with drugs. By 16, chasing highs. By 17, couch-surfing and barely holding life together. He believed in God. He just wasn’t following Him. Years later, sitting on his couch as a young adult, reading Scripture with fresh eyes, everything shifted. And when he finally let go of the identity he was clinging to, he discovered something unexpected: obedience felt like abundance. In this episode, Jason shares: Growing up around religion but discovering relationship Addiction, identity, and the quiet drift from God The surrender moment that transformed everything Serving before fully understanding Finding deep discipleship and brotherhood Navigating open-heart surgery and learning to receive grace Living out faith in the marketplace, not just the church This isn’t a story about having it all figured out. It’s about daily transformation. Resources & References Connect with Virtuous Cycle Coffee Follow Virtuous Cycle Coffee on Instagram, Facebook & YouTube Read: Romans 12:1–2, Matthew 6:33, Hebrews 11:6, Revelation 3:20

What do you do when the faith you inherited never brings the peace you’re promised? Suzanne Hancock was born and raised in the Mormon (LDS) church. She followed the rules, did what was expected, and built her identity around a faith tradition handed down for generations—yet peace always felt just out of reach. In this episode, Suzanne courageously shares her long, honest journey of seeking truth: Growing up Mormon and quietly questioning what didn’t sit right Feeling trapped between loyalty, identity, and unanswered questions Wrestling with shame, anxiety, and depression while searching for peace Stepping into a Christian church for the first time—alone and uncertain Discovering Jesus not as a system, but as a relationship Walking away from a lifelong identity and choosing Christ for herself Experiencing baptism as freedom, joy, and new life Learning to trust God daily with anxiety, parenting, and purpose This is not a story about switching religions. It’s a story about seeking truth, finding peace, and choosing Jesus—no matter the cost. If you’ve ever: Felt spiritually restless even inside a faith tradition Feared disappointing people by asking hard questions Struggled with anxiety, shame, or identity loss Wondered whether Jesus could really bring peace Suzanne’s story is a powerful reminder that Jesus keeps His promise: “Seek, and you will find.” 🎧 Listen now to hear how surrender, courage, and grace reshaped one woman’s faith—and future. RESOURCES & REFERENCES 📖 Bible Verses Matthew 3:17 Matthew 7:7–8 Jeremiah 29:11 Psalm 103 🔗 Helpful Resources & Next Steps Rooted Alpha Shalom Message Series

What happens when the life you’re chasing leaves you empty.. and God meets you at rock bottom? Jackson Ford didn’t grow up deeply rooted in faith. For years, God felt distant - something reserved for holidays and church buildings, not everyday life. College only amplified that distance as partying, addiction, and isolation quietly took hold. Then everything changed. In this episode, Jackson shares his raw and hopeful story of transformation: Growing up around church but never really knowing God How COVID isolation exposed deeper emptiness and addiction Hitting rock bottom during college and encountering grace for the first time Saying yes to Jesus and watching identity, relationships, and purpose change Learning to love selflessly instead of living for himself Discernment, surrender, and an unexpected call into ministry This isn’t a story about having it all figured out. It’s about curiosity turning into conviction. If you’ve ever: Felt far from God even when you knew about Him Tried to numb emptiness with success, relationships, or habits Wondered if God could really use your past Wrestled with obedience when it didn’t make logical sense Jackson’s story is a reminder that God doesn’t wait for us to clean ourselves up - He meets us in the mess and leads us forward. Resources & References Watch: Defining Moments: Jackson's Story  Read: Romans 8, Acts 11:1-3, and Matthew 6:25-34 The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis

Raised in a deeply Mennonite home, Brad Brenneman grew up surrounded by faith, service, and spiritual discipline. But it wasn’t until adulthood—after success, ambition, and an unexpected sense of emptiness—that grace became personal. In this episode, Brad shares a story best described as “surprised by grace”: Growing up with a strong spiritual heritage—and learning faith for himself Leading businesses with humility, stewardship, and love for people Saying yes to international adoption - and watching grace multiply Learning generosity as a pathway to joy, not obligation If you’ve ever: Wondered whether your career could truly be a calling Struggled to reconcile ambition with faith Felt God nudging you toward generosity, leadership, or adoption Believed in grace, but wanted to experience it more deeply Brad’s journey offers a compelling reminder: God often does His deepest work quietly... through faithfulness, surrender, and everyday obedience. 🎧 Listen now to hear how a life rooted in grace can shape work, family, generosity, and legacy. KEY VERSES & QUOTES (NIV) Proverbs 3:5–6 (NIV) “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 (NIV) “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 2 Corinthians 9:6–8 (NIV) “Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” Mark 10:45 (NIV) “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Quote “Humility is not thinking less of yourself but thinking of yourself less.” Books What's So Amazing About Grace, Phillip Yancey

Tim Johnson was serving as a senior pastor when he received a life-altering Parkinson’s diagnosis. Overnight, certainty disappeared, plans unraveled, and the future became fragile. In this second episode of This Is My Story, Tim shares the story after the diagnosis: Hearing the word Parkinson’s and choosing not to waste it Letting go of leadership, identity, and control Learning to trust God without demanding answers Finding peace, and even joy, while living with uncertainty Discovering a new calling rooted in care, presence, and hope This isn’t a conversation about healing formulas. It’s about faith when the miracle doesn’t come the way you expect. If you’ve ever: Faced a diagnosis you didn’t see coming Wondered why God didn’t intervene Struggled to trust when your future feels unsteady Tim’s journey offers a steady, honest reminder: God may not remove the suffering, but He never removes His presence. 🎧 Listen now to hear how faith, surrender, and purpose can grow even in the shadow of Parkinson’s.

Carly Patterson was just 16 when she won Olympic gold - then suddenly had to figure out who she was without gymnastics. In our first episode of Season 3: This Is My Story, Carly shares the rarely told story after the medals: The identity crisis that followed peak success The pressure to live up to “gold” for the rest of her life Her unexpected faith journey when control slipped away A painful season of infertility—and learning to release outcomes How purpose looks different when the spotlight fades This isn’t a story about gymnastics. It’s a story about what we do when our biggest win doesn’t bring peace. If you’ve ever: Reached a milestone and still felt unfulfilled Struggled with identity after a major life transition Tried to control an outcome that wouldn’t budge Carly’s journey will meet you right where you are—and remind you that your worth was never tied to your achievement. 🎧 Listen now to hear how faith, surrender, and resilience reshaped life after Olympic gold.

In this powerful season finale of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, host Paul Basden sits in the guest chair—interviewed by creative pastor and longtime friend Allison Harrell. Together, they explore Paul’s personal journey as an Enneagram Type 1 (The Reformer) and how understanding his type has shaped his spiritual life, leadership, and relationships. With honesty, humor, and deep self-reflection, Paul shares how childhood experiences formed his worldview, why he mistyped himself as a Two for years, how spiritual direction and counseling transformed him, and how he’s learning to distinguish his inner critic from the voice of the Holy Spirit. This episode also addresses big questions Christians often ask about the Enneagram: Is the Enneagram biblical? Is it compatible with Christian faith? Does it truly help us follow Jesus? Paul offers thoughtful, pastorally grounded responses while weaving in Scripture—especially Romans 8—to show how the Enneagram can be a tool for spiritual formation when held in the right way.  

This episode takes a second, deeper look at the Enneagram Type 9—this time through the voices of two leaders on the Preston Trail staff: Ryan and Cody. With humor, vulnerability, and relatable honesty, they explore what it means to lead, parent, partner, and grow as Nines in a church setting. Ryan and Cody share openly about their experiences as Nines working closely together, leading teams, raising young families, and seeking emotional and spiritual health in a fast-paced ministry environment. Together, they unpack hallmark traits of the Type 9—harmony-seeking, calm presence, empathy, stubbornness, avoidance, and the quiet strength that emerges when a Nine steps into healthy leadership. You’ll hear real stories, vulnerable insights, and practical reflections on marriage, parenting, ministry, spiritual formation, and how the Enneagram helps them better follow Jesus. Whether you identify as an Enneagram 9, love a Nine, or lead alongside one, this conversation offers practical wisdom and heartfelt encouragement for your everyday life and relationships.

This episode explores the Enneagram Type 9: The Peacemaker, featuring two authentic and engaging voices—Robin Johnson and Denise Basden. Both share openly about their upbringing, personality patterns, life as pastor’s wives, and their unique journeys toward emotional and spiritual maturity. Their stories highlight why Type 9s are often called “the sweethearts of the Enneagram.” Drawing from real stories of marriage, motherhood, life, and church leadership, Robin and Denise unpack the core motivations and struggles of the Enneagram 9: the longing for peace, the fear of conflict, the tendency to avoid decisions, and the quiet strength of loyalty, empathy, and steadiness. Listeners will hear how Type Nines navigate relationships with strong personality types (like Enneagram 1s and 8s), how they manage emotional overwhelm, and how their calm, grounding presence becomes a gift to families, churches, and communities. Perfect for anyone interested in: ✔ Enneagram Type 9 traits ✔ Christian spiritual growth ✔ Personality and emotional health ✔ Marriage and family dynamics through the Enneagram lens ✔ How the Peacemaker style strengthens relationships and communities

In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do: Exploring the Enneagram, host Paul Basden interviews longtime friend and co–senior pastor Jim Johnson for an in-depth, engaging, and heartfelt look at the Enneagram Type 8 personality—the Challenger. Jim shares his moving family story, including the life-altering accident that shaped his parents’ faith and filled his childhood with unconditional love. From leadership in the church to marriage and parenting, Jim offers real-life examples of how Type 8 traits show up in daily life. Listeners will learn: What drives an Enneagram 8 How Type 8s lead, love, work, and relate Why Eights value independence, justice, and honesty The common fears and anxieties of Type 8s What healthy vs. unhealthy Type 8 behavior looks like How the Eight’s passion for strength and protection can mirror the heart of Jesus This conversation is rich with wisdom, humor, and practical takeaways for anyone who is a Type 8, loves a Type 8, or leads with a Type 8. If you're exploring personal growth, spiritual formation, or Enneagram wisdom, this episode will give you clarity, encouragement, and a deeper appreciation for the powerful, justice-oriented Enneagram Eight.

In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do?, we explore the vibrant, possibility-driven world of the Enneagram Type 7—The Enthusiast. Host Paul Basden interviews Natalie Wells, Parent Communications Director at Preston Trail Community Church, who shares how the Seven’s love of fun, spontaneity, and freedom shapes her family life, marriage to an Enneagram One, and her spiritual walk. Natalie opens up about her upbeat “YOLO” mindset, her legendary costume carpool line, and the challenge Sevens face in sitting with sadness—especially through the loss of her father. She also shares practical ways she’s learned to pause, savor, and stay present. If you're an Enneagram 7 (or love one), this episode offers relatable stories, faith-based insight, and a deeper look at the unique gifts and struggles of The Enthusiast. Show Notes What defines an Enneagram 7 Strengths and shadow sides of The Enthusiast How Sevens navigate marriage with an Enneagram One The role of spontaneity, FOMO, and planning the next adventure How Sevens avoid sadness—and how Natalie learned to face it The spiritual journey of an Enneagram 7: joy, gratitude, and open-handed living Natalie’s famous “costume carpool line” tradition Scripture that resonates with Type 7s: John 10:10, Ecclesiastes 8:15

In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, Paul Basden sits down with two longtime Preston Trail pastors—Warren Jacobs (Worship Pastor) and Josh Manuel (Men’s Pastor)—to explore the steady, loyal, and thoughtful nature of the Enneagram Type Six: The Loyalist.   Known as the “guardian” of the Enneagram, Sixes are faithful, reliable, and protective—always planning ahead to make sure others feel safe and supported. But beneath that loyalty lies a constant battle with fear, self-doubt, and the need for security. Together, Warren and Josh share how these traits show up in their lives, marriages, parenting, and ministry—and how faith helps them turn anxiety into trust.   Listeners will hear: How Sixes bring stability and reliability to relationships and teams. Why fear and overthinking can lead to “paralysis by analysis”—and how to break that cycle. How loyalty and problem-solving make Sixes natural leaders and teammates. What Scripture says about overcoming fear and resting in God’s security (Philippians 4:6–8, Jeremiah 29:11, and Romans 12:1). The humor, humility, and practical wisdom that help Sixes thrive at home, at work, and in faith.   Whether you’re a Six yourself or love someone who is, this conversation offers a powerful reminder: peace doesn’t come from control—it comes from trust.

In this insightful episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, Paul Basden sits down with Sonya Jacobs, Marriage and Support Pastor at Preston Trail Community Church, to explore the thoughtful and deeply introspective world of the Enneagram Type Five: The Investigator.   As a biblical counselor, ministry leader, and wife of 31 years, Sonya offers a unique window into the mind of a Type Five—known for their curiosity, independence, and lifelong pursuit of knowledge. Together, Paul and Sonya unpack what it looks like to live as a Five in marriage, parenting, and ministry, and how this personality type’s strength of insight can also become a struggle with emotional detachment or over-independence.   Listeners will hear:   How Enneagram Fives process life through learning, observation, and reflection.   The challenge of balancing self-sufficiency with vulnerability in relationships.   The spiritual transformation that happens when Fives surrender control and allow others in.   Why healthy rhythms of rest, solitude, and study are essential to thriving as a Five.   How understanding her Enneagram type helps Sonya counsel others, nurture her family, and grow closer to Christ.   Sonya’s story is both deeply practical and spiritually rich—offering encouragement for anyone who’s ever wrestled with needing to “know enough” before taking a step of faith.   Mentioned in this episode:   The Enneagram Made Easy by Renee Baron and Elizabeth Wagele   The Gift of Being Yourself by David Benner

In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, Paul Basden sits down with Tara Wedemeyer — licensed professional counselor, artist, wife, mom of two boys, and Enneagram Type Four — for a raw, honest, and beautifully nuanced look at what it means to live as The Individualist. Enneagram Fours are known for their creativity, emotional depth, and desire to live with authenticity. Tara shares how this plays out in real life: in her marriage, parenting two teenage boys, co-owning a counseling practice, and navigating her own inner world with compassion and curiosity. She opens up about the gifts of being a Four — empathy, creativity, intuition — as well as the challenges, like the pull toward melancholy, the longing to feel “unique,” and the inner critic that sometimes gets too loud. In this conversation you’ll hear Tara discuss: The tension between creativity and vulnerability Why emotional depth is not the same as depression How she navigates the “inner critic” and practices self-compassion The power of boundaries and emotional safety in relationships How knowing her Enneagram type shapes her faith, counseling, and motherhood Paul also unpacks what makes Fours distinct: a desire to be authentic and unique, comfort with the full range of emotions, and the belief that something significant is missing — both in them and in life. Tara responds with honesty, reflection, and humor, offering listeners a look inside the emotional landscape of a Four and demonstrating how this type brings beauty and depth to the world.  Whether you are a Four, love a Four, or struggle to understand a Four, this episode offers validation, clarity, and a reminder that our deepest emotions can be invitations to connection — not isolation.

In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, Paul sits down with two dynamic leaders from Preston Trail Community Church—Angel Hadley (Engagement Pastor) and Rick Wisner (Discipleship Pastor)—to explore the drive, discipline, and heart of the Enneagram Type 3: The Achiever. Known for their energy, focus, and relentless pursuit of excellence, Threes are natural leaders who inspire others to reach new goals—but they also face unique challenges beneath the surface. Together, Angel and Rick offer an honest, faith-centered look at how the Achiever’s desire for success, validation, and admiration can both fuel impact and create exhaustion. You’ll hear: How Threes balance ambition and authenticity in ministry, family, and daily life. The shadow side of achievement—perfectionism, image management, and burnout. How self-awareness and faith can transform performance into purpose. Practical ways to slow down, celebrate small wins, and lead with grace instead of striving. With humor, humility, and hard-earned wisdom, Angel and Rick share how they’ve learned to root their identity not in performance, but in Christ. This episode offers a refreshing reminder that true success isn’t about achieving more—it’s about becoming more like Jesus.

05: In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, Paul sits down with his daughter, Kari Dobbs, to unpack life as an Enneagram Two—the Helper and Encourager. Known for their deep compassion, loyalty, and desire to be needed, Twos are often described as the most relational type on the Enneagram. But as Kari shares, those same strengths can sometimes become struggles when pride, people-pleasing, or perfectionism creep in.   Together, Paul and Kari explore:   What it means to live with a “Helper’s heart” in marriage, parenting four boys, teaching, ministry, and friendships.   The strengths of a Two: empathy, loyalty, encouragement, and the ability to connect deeply with others.   The shadow side of a Two: pride, over-functioning, and the exhaustion that comes from giving until there’s nothing left.   How Kari has learned to balance caring for others with setting healthy boundaries and practicing self-care.   Why faith and encouragement are central to her identity, and how following Jesus has reshaped her understanding of serving and loving others.   Kari’s story is filled with honesty, humor, and hard-won wisdom about relationships, self-awareness, and spiritual growth. Whether you’re a Two yourself or love someone who is, this episode shines a light on both the beauty and the challenges of the Helper’s journey.

04: In this episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, Paul sits down with Sarah Davidson, Executive Pastor of Ministries at Preston Trail Community Church, to unpack the gifts and challenges of being an Enneagram One. Known as the Perfectionist or the Improver, Ones are motivated by a deep desire to do what’s right, live with integrity, and make the world a better place.   Sarah shares candidly about how her Enneagram type shapes her marriage, parenting three boys, and leadership of a large church staff. From the high standards and reliability that make her a trusted leader, to the inner critic and critical eye that can sometimes create tension, Sarah opens up about the real-life experience of being a One at work and at home.   Together, Paul and Sarah explore:   The strengths of a One: integrity, clarity, reliability, and consistency.   The shadow side of a One: perfectionism, criticism, and the struggle to rest.   How Sarah has learned to pursue excellence over perfection and lean into grace.   Practical wisdom for Ones learning to silence the inner critic, embrace rest, and lead with encouragement instead of judgment.   Whether you’re an Enneagram One yourself or love someone who is, this conversation offers rich insight into how Ones can move from criticism to compassion, and from perfectionism to peace.

03: Knowing your Enneagram number is just the beginning. In this episode, host Paul Basden dives deeper into the Enneagram to uncover the layers that reveal not only your type, but also your habits, motivations, and path toward transformation.   You’ll unpack:   Virtues and Vices: How your greatest strengths can also become your biggest struggles, and why choosing virtue over vice leads to growth.   Centers of Intelligence (Triads): The Heart (2-3-4), Head (5-6-7), and Gut (8-9-1) triads that shape how we feel, think, and act.   Paul shares how Christian faith intersects with the Enneagram, showing how prayer, confession, and the Holy Spirit help us move from vice to virtue—becoming more of who God created us to be.   Whether you’re just beginning with the Enneagram or you’ve studied it for years, this episode will give you practical tools and spiritual insights to deepen your journey of self-awareness and discipleship.   Additional Resources:  The Enneagram Made Easy by Elizabeth Wagele & Renee Baron The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron & Suzanne Stabile The Story of You by Ian Morgan Cron The Enneagram of Emotional Intelligence by Scott Allender

02: In this episode, Paul takes a deep dive into all nine Enneagram types—revealing how each type’s core motivations, strengths, and struggles can shape the way we live, love, and follow God. From the Perfectionist’s drive to do things right, to the Peacemaker’s longing for harmony, each number offers both unique gifts and unique challenges.   Paul unpacks:   The defining traits, mottos, and anxieties of each type (1–9).   Why people with the same Enneagram number can look very different depending on wings, social preferences, spiritual gifts, and emotional health.   How the Enneagram can help you name your gifts, confront your struggles, and surrender your vices to God.   Whether you identify as a Perfectionist, Helper, Achiever, Artist, Thinker, Loyalist, Enthusiast, Challenger, or Peacemaker, this conversation shows how the Enneagram is not a magic formula but a trusted framework for self-knowledge, discipleship, and transformation.   This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to understand the Enneagram more deeply and apply it as a tool for spiritual growth.   Additional Resources:  The Enneagram Made Easy by Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron & Suzanne Stabile The Story of You by Ian Morgan Cron The Path Between Us by Suzanne Stabile The Journey Toward Wholeness by Suzanne Stabile The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective by Richard Rohr & Andreas Ebbert The Sacred Enneagram by Christopher Heuertz Personality Types by Don Richard Riso & Russ Hudson The Enneagram of Emotional Intelligence by Scott Allender

01: In this opening episode of Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram, host Paul Basden unpacks one of today’s most popular tools for self-discovery and spiritual growth: the Enneagram. If you’ve ever asked, “Who am I?” or wondered why you keep repeating certain patterns, this conversation will help you understand the Enneagram as more than a personality test—it’s a map of motivations, fears, and desires that can lead to both transformation and healing.   Paul tackles five big questions: Who am I? What is the Enneagram? How does it work? How do I use it? And where can I learn more? Along the way, he draws from Christian wisdom, Scripture, and his own counseling journey to explain how the Enneagram connects our worldview, our childhood wounds, and the vows we make that shape our behavior. He also highlights how this tool can deepen discipleship, helping us die to self and live more fully in the way of Jesus.   Whether you’re brand new to the Enneagram or a longtime learner, this episode offers a clear, practical introduction that blends psychology, theology, and spiritual practice. It’s the perfect place to begin your journey of asking, “Why do I do what I do?”   Books mentioned in this episode: The Enneagram Made Easy by Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron & Suzanne Stabile The Story of You by Ian Morgan Cron The Path Between Us by Suzanne Stabile The Journey Toward Wholeness by Suzanne Stabile The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective by Richard Rohr & Andreas Ebbert The Sacred Enneagram by Christopher Heuertz Personality Types by Don Richard Riso & Russ Hudson The Enneagram of Emotional Intelligence by Scott Allender

What is the Enneagram, and why does it matter for your faith and personal growth? In this teaser episode, Paul introduces his new podcast season, Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram. After months of conversations on faith, culture, and tough topics, Paul shifts the focus inward—showing how the Enneagram can be a powerful tool for self-awareness, spiritual formation, and transformation. Drawing from ancient wisdom, modern psychology, and Scripture, Paul shares how knowing yourself is the first step toward living with integrity and experiencing God’s love more deeply. This episode sets the stage for what’s ahead: an introduction to the Enneagram system, in-depth interviews with all nine Enneagram types, and reflections on how self-knowledge leads to lasting change. If you’ve ever wondered “Why do I do what I do?”—this season is for you.

Over the past 10 months, we’ve tackled some of the most polarizing topics in culture—faith, politics, sexuality, justice, and more—not to divide, but to unite. In this heartfelt finale of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden revisits the core question: How can we have hard conversations that actually bring healing? Join us as we explore: 🔹 The power of words to divide or unite (Proverbs 12:18, Ephesians 4:29) 🔹 How to be known for love—even in disagreement (John 13:34-35) 🔹 Practical wisdom for families, churches, and public discourse 🔹 Why unity, not uniformity, is the goal of gospel conversations Whether you’ve felt misunderstood, wrestled with opposing beliefs, or simply long for a better way to talk across divides, this episode offers both challenge and hope. May our conversations be honest, humble, and healing. And may they always begin—and end—in love. 🎧 Listen now to the season finale, and stay tuned next week for a brand-new season: Why Do I Do What I Do? Exploring the Enneagram.

In Part 2 of our series on gun control, host Paul Basden is joined by Greg, a long-time gun owner, and Mike, an active-duty police officer. Together, they tackle one of the most polarizing topics in America—firearms—through the lens of faith, public safety, and personal responsibility. Join us as we explore: Why Christians feel conflicted about gun ownership How personal experience shapes beliefs about gun laws The tension between the right to bear arms and the call to peacemaking What it means to prioritize both safety and compassion in a divided culture Whether you're a Second Amendment supporter, an advocate for reform, or somewhere in between, this episode offers a grounded and thoughtful dialogue on one of today's most pressing issues.

The gun control debate is more than political—it's personal, moral, and spiritual. In this episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, Paul Basden takes us to the epicenter of the controversy: the right to bear arms. Before diving into interviews and expert opinions next week, this Part 1 episode explores the spiritual tension many Christians feel when trying to balance personal freedom with public safety. Join us as we explore: Four foundational beliefs that shape American attitudes on guns—sacredness of life, human sinfulness, the instinct to defend, and the constitutional right to bear arms What Scripture says about valuing life and community How churches can step into the gap with radical acceptance and relational rescue This episode challenges both extremes of the debate and asks deeper questions: What kind of person are you becoming? What kind of society are we building? Whether you’re a gun owner, an advocate for reform, or somewhere in between, this conversation invites reflection, not reaction.   Listen now and prepare to be both convicted and comforted. Subscribe wherever you stream podcasts. Tune in next week for Part 2 featuring expert interviews.

In this powerful and deeply personal episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, Paul Basden sits down with longtime Preston Trail Creative Pastor Allison Harrell and couples group coordinator D’Anthony Forte to talk about a subject too many know firsthand: church hurt. Allison opens up about growing up in a high-control religious group she now recognizes as a cult—where authority went unchecked, manipulation was normalized, and eventually, her family was excommunicated. D’Anthony shares how fear-based faith, legalism, and judgment shaped his earliest experiences with church, leading to decades of anxiety and a 14-year absence from Christian community. Together, they discuss: What spiritual abuse and toxic church cultures can look like Why walking away is sometimes a survival response—and why coming back is possible The role of therapy, vulnerability, and real community in healing How God’s love can meet us in our rawest, most wounded places The surprising truth: church can still be the place where healing happens Whether you’ve been burned by spiritual authority, are afraid to trust again, or are simply walking alongside someone who’s been hurt, this episode offers honesty, grace, and hope. 🔔 Subscribe to hear more honest, unfiltered conversations about faith, pain, and the messy beauty of following Jesus.

Is justice just a political buzzword hijacked by the culture wars—or is it central to the heart of God? In this thought-provoking episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden dives deep into the biblical roots of justice and challenges us to move beyond partisan stereotypes to embrace God’s call to care for the vulnerable. Join us as we explore: What the Hebrew prophets (like Isaiah) really said about justice (Isaiah 1:17, 10:1-2, 58:6-7) How Jesus wove justice into His mission (Luke 4:16-19, Matthew 25:31-46) Why justice is more than politics—it’s a reflection of God’s character How Christians can model “truth in action” (Benjamin Disraeli) to a watching world Is justice just another liberal agenda, or is it God’s mandate for His people? Tune in as we uncover what Scripture teaches and how the pursuit of justice might be what draws people back to the church.

Re-Release : Is love for your country a virtue—or can it become a form of idolatry? In this thought-provoking episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden explores the fine line between patriotism and nationalism, and what Scripture teaches about our highest allegiance. Join us as we explore: The biblical call to seek God’s Kingdom above all else (Matthew 6:33) Why nationalism can subtly replace God with nation as our object of worship (Philippians 3:20, Ephesians 2:19) C.S. Lewis’ warning: “The love of one’s country becomes a demon when it becomes a god” A vision of God’s people from every nation united in worship (Revelation 7:9-10) How can we honor our nation without displacing God from the throne of our hearts? Tune in as we wrestle with this important question and discover what it means to be a citizen of heaven while living on earth.

Social media connects us more than ever before—so why do so many of us still feel so alone? In this episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden sits down with Ashlynn McKay Lurkens, social media influencer, and podcast producer, for a candid look at the beautiful and broken realities of life online. From influencer culture and identity formation to adolescent anxiety and digital discipleship, this conversation unpacks the pressures and possibilities of social media in the modern age. Join us as we explore: Why comparison and curated content can be toxic for young minds How the rise of screens is shaping the next generation’s mental health Practical boundaries for healthier social media engagement The role of Christian wisdom in a hyper-connected world Whether you're a parent navigating tech with your kids or a content creator seeking meaning beyond metrics, this episode offers grace, insight, and tangible takeaways. As Ashlynn reminds us, “Social media isn’t the enemy—but it’s not always real, either.”   🔗 Resources mentioned: The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt Explore How to Know a Person by David Brooks  

Social media touches nearly every part of our daily lives—but is it helping us love better, or hurting our ability to connect meaningfully? In this thought-provoking solo episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden explores the power, pitfalls, and potential of social platforms through a biblical lens. From endless scrolling to the search for validation, Paul challenges listeners to evaluate their digital habits in light of Jesus’ command to love our neighbors—online and off. Join us as we explore: The addictive nature of social media—and why we touch our phones 2,600 times a day How social media can be both a relational gift and a cultural curse What Jesus’ Golden Rule looks like in a digital world (Matthew 7:12) Practical reflections on how to scroll with purpose, not passivity Reflections on How to Know a Person by David Brooks Key insights from Jonathan Haidt’s research on teen mental health and tech use Whether you’re an influencer or a casual scroller, this episode will challenge you to think more deeply about the role of social media in your life— and consider what it might mean to live your faith out loud, even in the comment section.

What if your deepest sense of identity doesn’t fit within the traditional framework of the church—but your love for Jesus still burns bright? In this honest and moving episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden sits down with author and speaker Greg Coles for a vulnerable conversation about faith, identity, and what it means to live as a single, gay Christian committed to the authority of Scripture. Together, they explore: Greg’s personal story of discovering his same-sex attraction and reconciling it with his Christian faith The tension between authenticity and orthodoxy in today’s church How the church can better welcome LGBTQ believers without compromising biblical convictions The beauty of chosen singleness and the calling to faithful community As Greg says in the episode, “My identity in Christ doesn’t erase my sexuality, but it gives me a lens to live it out in love, truth, and hope.” Whether you’re wrestling with your own identity or seeking to love those who are, this episode is a masterclass in nuance, empathy, and theological faithfulness. Dive deeper with Greg’s resources: • Single, Gay, Christian – Amazon | GregoryColes.com • No Longer Strangers – Learn More • The Center for Faith, Sexuality & Gender – CenterforFaith.com Follow Greg on Instagram, Twitter/X, or visit GregoryColes.com Tune in now and join a conversation that’s changing the way the church loves and leads.

Same-sex attraction is one of the most emotionally charged and spiritually complex conversations in the modern church. What does it mean to hold fast to biblical convictions while extending the radical love of Jesus? In this thought-provoking episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden invites listeners into a grace-and-truth-filled conversation about LGBTQ+ identity, specifically same-sex attraction. Rather than choosing between condemnation or full affirmation, Paul explores a third way—rooted in Scripture, compassion, and the image of God in every person. Join us as we explore: Why same-sex attraction is not inherently sinful What it means to be a single, gay Christian pursuing Jesus How the church can walk with LGBTQ+ believers in love and honesty Why “love your neighbor” (Matthew 22:39) must guide this dialogue Resources Mentioned in This Episode: • Preston Trail’s belief statement on same-sex attraction: prestontrail.org/finalthought • Single, Gay, Christian by Gregory Coles: Amazon | Author’s Website Can you be gay and still faithfully follow Jesus? Let’s talk about it—with courage, clarity, and compassion. Listen now and join the conversation.

Is divorce the unforgivable sin—or can God bring beauty out of brokenness? In this vulnerable and redemptive episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden tackles the topic of divorce with wisdom, truth, and compassion. Drawing from Scripture and real-life reflections, Paul explores the pain of divorce, the purpose of marriage, and the surprising grace of a God who never gives up on us—even when our relationships do. Join us as we unpack: God’s original design for marriage: “You first. You only. You always.” (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4–6) The true cause of divorce: hardness of heart (Matthew 19:8) The staggering emotional and spiritual cost of broken vows Why divorce is never the end of the story—God still redeems and restores Whether you’re married, divorced, or walking with someone through heartbreak, this conversation will equip you with biblical truth and grace to navigate one of life’s most difficult realities. Listen now and be reminded: God is still Emmanuel—God with us—even when marriages fall apart.

How should Christians respond when someone's gender identity doesn’t match their biological sex? Is it loving to affirm? Is it faithful to confront? Is there a better, more Jesus-like way? In this important episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, Pastor Paul Basden dives into one of today’s most sensitive and controversial topics: the “T” in LGBTQ. From the cultural spotlight on Caitlyn Jenner to the theological implications of gender dysphoria, Paul challenges listeners to approach this issue not with fear or anger—but with both grace and truth. Join us as we explore: What Scripture says about sex, gender, and our bodies (Genesis 1:27; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20) Why gender dysphoria is real and deeply painful for many How Christians can love transgender individuals without compromising biblical convictions Why listening, compassion, and time are critical to long-term healing and understanding What if the church could be a place where transgender individuals are met not with shame, but with friendship, prayer, and patient hope? Listen now and join the conversation. Let’s move beyond fear—and toward faithfulness.  

Is poverty a result of personal failure—or a symptom of a broken system? In this episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden explores the deeply human and deeply biblical dimensions of poverty, challenging us to think beyond politics and toward compassion. Join us as we explore: Global and national poverty statistics that demand attention Why God’s Word speaks so directly—and urgently—about the poor (Jeremiah 5:28, Isaiah 58:6-7, James 2:1-6) What Jesus meant when he said he came to bring “Good News to the poor” (Luke 4:18) How followers of Christ can move from helplessness to practical, grace-filled action Is poverty just a fact of life—or is it something God calls us to fight against? Tune in for a challenging, hopeful conversation that reframes how we see the least of these. Listen now and join the conversation.    

Is science the enemy of faith—or a reflection of God’s creativity? In this episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden explores the often-tension-filled relationship between science and Christianity, offering a refreshing take that honors both Scripture and scientific discovery. Join us as we explore: What science really is—and why Christians should care How Psalm 111:2 and Proverbs 25:2 encourage curiosity and discovery Why humility is essential in studying the universe God made (Romans 11:34, 36) How believers can approach science not with fear, but with worship Whether you’ve questioned how science fits with your faith or want to engage these conversations with more wisdom, this episode is a must-listen. Listen now and discover how curiosity and reverence can go hand-in-hand in God’s world.

Should Christians even care about climate change? Some say environmentalism is political. Others say it’s biblical. In this episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden asks: What if caring for the planet isn’t about partisanship—but about partnership with God? Join us as we discuss: Biblical foundations for environmental responsibility (Genesis 1–4) How the industrial revolution changed our relationship with nature What it means to co-rule creation with God Why caring for the planet is an act of love for future generations Whether you’re skeptical about the climate debate or all-in on going green, this episode offers a gracious, gospel-centered approach to one of today’s most pressing (and polarizing) issues. Listen now and join the conversation!

What does Easter truly mean beyond the empty tomb? In this heartfelt bonus episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden sits down with his longtime friend and co-founder of Preston Trail Community Church, Pastor Jim Johnson, for an intimate conversation about faith, doubt, healing, and the presence of the resurrected Jesus.   Together, they reflect on: The miracle that shaped Jim’s childhood and family legacy How personal sorrow deepened his understanding of Jesus’ love (Isaiah 53:3) Wrestling with fragile faith and finding hope in the resurrection (1 Corinthians 15, Romans 8) What it means to experience—not just believe in—the risen Christ (Luke 24:13-35)   As Jim prepares to preach the Easter message this year, he invites listeners to encounter the Spirit of Jesus in a fresh way. Whether you’re full of faith or carrying doubt, this episode offers an invitation to draw close to the living Savior.   🎧 Listen now and join us as we move from knowing about Easter… to experiencing the One it’s all about.

In this powerful episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden shifts the conversation from policy to people—inviting listeners to see immigrants not as a problem to solve, but as people to love. Through Scripture and story, Paul reminds us that our faith calls us to something deeper than politics: it calls us to radical hospitality.   Join us as we explore:   How Scripture calls us to love and welcome immigrants: (Exodus 23:9, Leviticus 19:33-34, Deuteronomy 10:17-19) Jesus’ teaching on caring for “the least of these”: (Matthew 25:40, 45) How Christian hospitality can transform how we see and serve strangers: (Hebrews 13:2) The difference between immigration policies and immigrant people—and why that distinction matters What does it look like to love “the foreigner among us” in a politically divided world? Can we be people of conviction and compassion? Watch Eunice's Immigrant Story Here

In this powerful follow-up episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, host Paul Basden is joined by Pastor Alison Leamon of Preston Trail Community Church for a candid and inspiring conversation about feminism, faith, and what it means to honor God’s call—regardless of gender. Alison shares her personal journey as a woman in ministry, from questioning her place in leadership to boldly stepping into her God-given teaching gift. Together, Paul and Alison explore the difference between secular feminism and biblical equality, inviting listeners to embrace a vision of co-leadership that reflects the heart of God. Join us as we explore: How calling and courage intersect in a woman’s leadership journey (Acts 2:17-18) Biblical models of women leading in the early Church (Romans 16:1-7) Why “complementarity without hierarchy” honors God’s design (Genesis 1:27) How men and women can champion one another in ministry and calling Is the Church ready to embrace the full gifts of women? Can feminism and faith coexist under the banner of Christ? Tune in to hear how God is writing a better story—one where men and women lead side-by-side for His glory. Listen now and join the conversation!