The Unhinged Father

One in eight men globally report mental health disorders. Seventy percent will avoid seeking help entirely. Only one in four men who admit to depression will ever go to therapy. Robbie found those numbers deeply concerning — and then realized he'd been one of them for most of his adult life.This isn't a therapy pitch. It's not a dadfluencer telling you that dads have it hard. It's a real conversation from someone who spent years white-knuckling his way through depression and anxiety, calling it stress, calling it tiredness, telling himself that needing help made him less of a man — until he finally figured out what was actually going on and why he'd been so resistant to facing it.Robbie opens up about his own ongoing struggles with anxiety and depression, his ADHD diagnosis, why he still doesn't have a therapist right now, and the one reframe that changed how he thinks about all of it — you're not asking for help, you're refueling.Topics covered: why men are culturally wired to avoid asking for help and where that wiring comes from, the gradual signs Robbie now recognizes when he's heading into a depressive cycle, why suffering in silence doesn't protect your family — it just makes them watch you suffer from the outside, what getting help actually looks like when therapy isn't your starting point, why naming it out loud to one person is sometimes the only first step you need, and the hardest truth in the episode — the version of you that never asks for anything, never shows weakness, never admits to struggling — that version isn't strong. That version is alone.If this one resonates, share it with someone who needs to hear it. There are a lot of men carrying things they don't have to carry alone.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

There are two guys Robbie wants to talk about. One brushes his teeth with brake fluid, hasn't communicated a feeling since 1987, and thinks vulnerability is something that happens to other people. The other one is so emotionally available he makes Miss Rachel look like Brock Lesnar. Both of them are a problem. And somewhere between these two caricatures, real men — real dads — are supposed to figure out who they're actually supposed to be.This is the masculinity episode TUF has been building toward. Not a lecture on what you should be. An honest look at where we're at, what we're being sold, and what it actually looks like to show your kids the full picture of what a man is — strong when they need a wall, goofy when they need a goofball, and emotionally present when they need someone to sit on the floor with them.Robbie is an Enneagram 8. Vulnerability doesn't come naturally. This episode is him working through it out loud — and making the case that the strongest version of a dad is the one who can do all three.Topics covered: the manosphere and why the brake fluid masculinity model has real costs for your kids and your marriage, what's actually missing on the other extreme, why your family needs different things from you at different times and why knowing which one to give them is the whole job, the specific moments where Robbie has shown his boys each side of him, and why controlled chaos — emotion plus reason — is the most powerful thing a man can develop.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

We are raising the first generation of kids who will never know a world without screens, infinite content, and instant gratification — and most of us are figuring it out as we go. In this episode, Robbie gets real about his own phone habits, why "tough shit, go be bored" is actually good parenting, and how to raise kids who can live in the real world without being left behind in the digital one.No anti-technology rants. No shame for parents who hand over the tablet sometimes. Just an honest, practical conversation about what it means to be screen-smart — for your kids and for yourself.Topics covered: why boredom builds better kids, the difference between overscheduled and overstimulated children, how to set guardrails without going full Amish, and why the example you're setting right now matters more than any rule you put in place later.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

If you're a dad in your 30s or 40s who hasn't seen a doctor in years, still thinks you can eat like you're 22, and keeps telling yourself you'll "get healthy later" — this one is for you. Because later has a way of becoming never.Robbie gets brutally honest about skipping physicals for five years, his history with high blood pressure and high cholesterol, the slow reality of losing weight after 35, and why getting healthy isn't vanity — it's showing up for your kids in the way they deserve.Topics covered: why dads avoid doctors and what it's actually costing you, realistic approaches to weight loss and fitness with a newborn and a full schedule, the mind-body connection nobody talks about, and why wanting to look good for your wife is a completely valid reason to get in shape.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

"Am I failing as a parent? Am I screwing my kids up?" If those thoughts have crossed your mind lately, this episode is for you. Because when your kid's behavior goes sideways during a big transition — new baby, new school, new house — it's easy to take it personally. And that's exactly when you make it worse.Robbie walks through a year of nonstop change in his own family and gets honest about what his kids' tantrums were really telling him — and what his own reaction was actually saying about him. This episode is less about fixing your kid and more about understanding what's happening in both of you.Topics covered: why transitions cause behavioral explosions in kids, what your child's nervous system is actually doing during a meltdown, how your emotional state pours gasoline on the fire, and practical tools that have actually worked — not just in theory, but in Robbie's house last week.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Everyone checks on the pregnant woman. The moment that baby arrives, the world moves on — and mom is left bleeding, sleep-deprived, hormonally wrecked, and expected to figure it out. As a dad of three, Robbie has seen this up close, and he's not going to pretend it isn't happening.This episode is for every dad who has ever said "she's fine" when she's clearly not — and for every mom who wishes her partner actually understood what she was going through. Honest, direct, and from someone who admits he was a complete dipshit the first time around and had to figure it out the hard way.Topics covered: what actually happens to a woman's body and hormones after birth, why the healthcare system largely abandons moms the moment the baby arrives, how to be a real partner instead of a well-meaning bystander, and what Robbie does differently now on baby three versus baby one.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

A few hours before heading to the hospital for the induction of his third son, Robbie sits down and hits record. No prep, no plan — just everything going through his head in real time. The fears, the work pressure, the sleep deprivation already starting, and what he's learned about himself across three kids that he wishes he'd known going into the first.If you're about to become a parent — or you're already in it and wondering why it feels harder than you expected — this is the episode you didn't know you needed.Topics covered: the anxiety nobody talks about before baby three, managing work expectations during paternity leave, how Robbie went from being a "complete shithead" as a new dad to the father he is today, and why having kids either forces you to grow or exposes exactly where you haven't.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

You know what you want to change. You've known for a while. And every time you get close to starting — something comes up, you talk yourself out of it, or you decide you'll just do it tomorrow. And then tomorrow becomes next week becomes next year. Sound familiar?Robbie gets into the thing that's actually blocking most people from making real changes in their life — and it's not motivation, it's not discipline, and it's not time. It's the starting. And there's a specific reason that first step feels so impossible, and a specific way to make it less so.Topics covered: why the start is always the hardest part and what to do about it, the difference between being kind to yourself and coddling yourself back into complacency, why the all-or-nothing mentality is killing your progress, and how to build the grit to just go — even when you're not fully ready and never will be.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Not a resolution episode. Not a "new year new me" pep talk. This is Robbie sitting down with a notebook, going through every area of his life that actually matters, and being honest about where he's at and where he wants to go — health, family, friendship, faith, business, and the legacy he's trying to leave for his kids.If you've been meaning to slow down and think about what you actually want your life to look like — not the highlight reel version, the real one — this is a good place to start.Topics covered: why health is the foundation everything else is built on, the challenge of making real friends as an adult man, how faith fits into Robbie's life without the evangelical sledgehammer, what legacy actually means when you're 38 with three boys, and why the podcast exists in the first place.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Five months. No episodes, no Instagram, no consistency. A new baby on the way, a house sale, a move, increased work pressure, and a slow slide back into some old habits Robbie thought he'd left behind. This is that episode — the honest return where he doesn't pretend the absence didn't happen or that he has it all figured out now.If you've ever been working on yourself and then watched life quietly undo some of that progress — this one will feel familiar. The point isn't that you'll never fall off. The point is what you do next.Topics covered: what five months of life chaos actually looks like, why falling off the wagon doesn't mean starting from zero, the difference between a regression and a setback, why modern parents seem more stressed than previous generations, and how to get back on track without the all-or-nothing spiral.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Younger generations are delaying marriage, skipping kids, and walking away from the white picket fence entirely — and honestly, Robbie gets it. The cost of having a family has never been higher, divorce rates reshaped an entire generation's view of commitment, and social media has made everyone else's life look better than yours. So is it still worth it?Robbie gives his most direct, unfiltered take on why he believes it is — while being completely honest about how hard it's been, the fertility challenges, the financial pressure, and the version of himself he had to become to show up for his family the way they deserve.Topics covered: why young adults are opting out of marriage and parenthood, the real financial barriers to starting a family in 2025, what's actually killing marriages (hint: it's not just compatibility), why having kids forced Robbie to become a better man, and his honest take on the childfree lifestyle.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Your kid throws their plate across the room and your first thought is "what the hell is wrong with you?" — which is a completely normal thought to have, and also exactly the wrong place to start. Because your kid isn't being a jerk. Their brain just doesn't work like yours yet. And how you respond in that moment says a lot more about your emotional regulation than theirs.Robbie gets into the discipline conversation he actually has with himself — the threats that go too far, the consequences that get unreasonable, and what it looks like to be a firm parent without becoming a dictator about it.Topics covered: why kids aren't capable of adult reasoning and what that means for discipline, the difference between authoritative and authoritarian parenting and why it matters, how your own emotional state shapes every interaction with your child, and practical approaches that build respect instead of fear.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Every parent wants to raise good kids. But somewhere along the way, "good" got replaced with "successful" — the right grades, the right sport, the right college. Robbie thinks we've got the priorities backwards, and in this episode he gets into what he's actually trying to build in his kids and why legacy matters more than achievement.This isn't a lecture on parenting philosophy. It's a real conversation about what kind of people you want your kids to become — and how the identity you build inside your family right now is the most powerful force shaping that.Topics covered: why achievement-focused parenting misses the point, what it means to create a family identity and why it matters, the difference between raising kids who perform well versus kids who are genuinely good people, and the one question Robbie keeps coming back to — what do you want your kids to leave behind?Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Somewhere between "toxic positivity" and "embrace the grind" culture, most people are living in a weird middle ground — pretending they're okay when they're not, doom-scrolling through other people's highlight reels, and wondering why they feel like they're falling behind. Robbie doesn't have a lot of patience for either extreme, and in this episode he gets into why.This is the episode for anyone who's tired of being told to just think positive — but also tired of the performative suffering and self-pity that's become equally trendy online. Real life is hard. That's not a trauma response, it's just Tuesday. And there's a way to acknowledge that without using it as a reason to stop showing up.Topics covered: why toxic positivity is actually harmful and not just annoying, the difference between having grace for yourself and letting yourself completely off the hook, what it actually looks like to embrace difficulty without performing it for social media, Robbie's own ongoing struggle with the all-or-nothing mentality, and how to keep going when things are legitimately hard without pretending they aren't.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Mental health awareness has come a long way — and that's genuinely a good thing. But somewhere between "it's okay not to be okay" and where we are now, something got twisted. Diagnoses became identities. Anxiety became a reason not to do hard things. And a lot of people stopped asking whether getting better was actually the goal anymore.Robbie isn't anti-therapy and he isn't minimizing real mental illness. He deals with his own anxiety and depression and he's open about that. But he's also willing to say what a lot of people are thinking but afraid to put into words — that the conversation has gotten unbalanced, and that accountability and growth are still part of the equation.Topics covered: how mental health awareness shifted from "get help" to "this is my identity," why bad therapy can be worse than no therapy, the difference between acknowledging your struggles and letting them define your limits, the missing conversation about accountability in the mental health space, and what real growth actually looks like when you're dealing with anxiety or depression.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

We won't let kids walk to the park alone, but we'll hand them an unsupervised portal to the entire internet. We bubble-wrap them from scraped knees and then wonder why they can't handle hard emotions. If that contradiction bothers you too, this episode is going to feel like a long exhale.Inspired by Jonathan Haidt's "The Anxious Generation," Robbie breaks down the overprotection paradox — and why the thing we think is keeping kids safe might actually be what's making them fragile.Topics covered: why kids are physically tougher than we think and emotionally less equipped for the online world than we realize, the concept of anti-fragility and what it means for how we raise our kids, why boredom and risk are actually essential to child development, and how to find the balance between protecting your kids and accidentally raising someone who can't handle real life.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie went to UC Santa Barbara, started as a biochemistry pre-med student, burned out completely, switched to sociology, and graduated with a degree he freely admits he uses mostly for bar trivia. He's not bitter about it — but he does have some strong opinions about what nobody tells 18-year-olds before they sign up for six figures of debt.This isn't a college-bashing episode and it's not a "just go, it builds character" episode either. It's the honest middle ground — the one that actually looks at the real problems in the system without pretending there are easy answers.Topics covered: why not everyone should go to college and why that's okay to say out loud, the predatory reality of student loans that nobody talks about, what Robbie would tell his own kids about higher education, the value of trade schools and alternative paths, and how to think about the college decision without the noise from either political extreme.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

It happened at the park. Robbie's two-year-old is heading up the slide, mom is ready to intervene, Robbie is standing back watching him figure it out. Three seconds later the kid makes it down fine — and then immediately slips trying to climb back up and faceplants. Turns out they were both right. And that's kind of the point.This episode is about why two parents who see things differently aren't a problem to solve — they're actually what your kid needs. The real issue isn't that you disagree. It's what happens when you can't manage that disagreement without making your kids carry the weight of it.Topics covered: why conflicting parenting styles actually create a more balanced environment for kids, the one thing that does real damage when parents disagree, how Robbie and his wife handled a punishment he genuinely thought was wrong — and what that looked like in practice, and why presenting a united front matters more than being right.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

From ages 24 to 28, Robbie was, in his own words, not the person he wanted to be. Drinking too much, eating like hell, not going to the gym, not pulling his weight at home, checked out emotionally, shoving everything down and calling it strength. His wife had to put up with the brunt of it. He's still a little ashamed of it.This episode isn't a redemption arc wrapped up neatly with a bow. It's an honest look at what that version of himself actually cost, what finally started to shift it, and what he still struggles with now — specifically the inability to admit he can't do something until he's already dropped the ball on it.Topics covered: what self-sabotage actually looks like in a young husband and father, why repressing everything doesn't make you stronger, the specific patterns Robbie still catches himself falling into, the difference between changing who you are and dialing in the best version of who you already are, and why having kids either forces you to grow up or exposes exactly where you haven't.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

During a Valentine's Day bedtime routine, Robbie's five-year-old said one of the things he appreciates most is that mom and dad like each other. That they hug and kiss. That they show affection. It was a small moment that turned into a bigger thought — about what kids actually feel when they see their parents genuinely connected, and what they feel when they don't.This isn't a lovey-dovey episode. It's a real conversation about what it means to keep your marriage visible to your kids — not perfectly, not performatively, but consistently — and why that visibility is one of the most important things you can give them.Topics covered: why kids experience parental affection as physical safety, what happens to kids' nervous systems when mom and dad are in conflict, why Robbie grew up in a house where affection wasn't visible and what he's doing differently, the masculinity angle — you can be a strong protector and still show your wife love in front of your kids, and why "keep the wolves away" means more than just physical protection.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie has definitely bragged about his kids hitting milestones early. He's also aware that he was being slightly annoying about it. This episode is his honest examination of the weird competitive culture that forms in parent groups — where normal developmental milestones somehow become a ranking system for whose kid is more special and, by extension, whose parenting is better.It's not about shaming the parents who brag. It's about what that competition is actually doing — to the parents whose kids develop slower, to the kids who eventually run into someone better than them, and to the whole idea of what you actually want your kids to measure their worth by.Topics covered: why parents turn childhood milestones into competitions and what that actually costs everyone, how bragging about your kid's early achievements can quietly create anxiety in other parents and other kids, what Robbie wants his own kids to hang their identity on instead of achievements, why your kid is the Bluey "Baby Race" episode in real life whether you like it or not, and the difference between pushing your kids to grow and tying your own self-worth to their performance.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

March 2020. Robbie was six months into being a dad — the exact moment in life when you're supposed to be leaning on people, asking for help, building a village. Instead everyone shut down, locked up, and learned to fear other people. He went along with a lot of it. He's still paying for some of it.This one is less a structured episode and more a genuine processing session — about how a guy who used to host barbecues and talk to strangers became someone who keeps people at arm's length, and whether that's just him or something a lot of people are quietly dealing with and not talking about.Topics covered: why the pandemic hit new parents especially hard, how lockdown rewired Robbie's relationship with other people and community in ways he didn't expect, the social isolation hangover that nobody's really talking about, how political division replaced the pandemic as the next thing keeping people apart, and what he's trying to do to get back to the person he was — and the person he wants to be.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie saw a video online — a dad filming his son being pulled away by the mom, kid absolutely bawling, chaos everywhere, and the page presenting it like the dad was doing something heroic. Robbie thought both parents were idiots. And that the kid was the only one paying the real price for it.That video opened up a bigger conversation about the gotcha moment culture we're all living in — where parents film their kids doing dangerous things instead of stopping them, where custody disputes get played out on social media, where we're so busy capturing the moment we forget to actually be in it. Robbie's not above it either. He admits it. That's what makes this one worth listening to.Topics covered: why filming your kid's meltdown instead of addressing it is a parenting failure, the specific ways viral culture is making parents worse at parenting, Robbie's own struggle with living through his phone and what he's doing about it, the catch-22 of wanting memories versus being present for them, and what his two-year-old has already figured out that most adults haven't.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie's five-year-old woke him up in the middle of the night, grabbed him by the neck climbing into bed, and nearly got demolished by a dad who wakes up swinging. He didn't. He got a hug, got walked back to his room, got his head rubbed. And it got Robbie thinking about what it actually means to be the person your kids run to instead of away from.Not the safe space in the college campus sense. The real one — the kind where your teenager calls you from a party instead of getting in the car with a drunk driver, because they know you'll be angry but you won't stop loving them. That kind of trust doesn't happen when they're 16. It starts being built right now, in the small moments.Topics covered: why being a disciplinarian and being a safe space aren't opposites, what it actually costs your kids when you lose your temper on small things, why Robbie worries more about his kids going to the internet than coming to him, how to validate a fear without validating what they're afraid of, and the long game of building the kind of trust that makes your kid choose you when it really matters.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie had a few too many glasses of wine with his father-in-law, got into a deep conversation about old school versus new school parenting, and decided to bring the whole thing to the podcast. The result is one of the most honest episodes about where he actually lands on discipline, empathy, and what it means to raise good humans without being a pushover or a dictator.He grew up with old school tough love. He's also someone who believes in emotional intelligence and treating kids like actual human beings. Most parenting content makes you pick a lane. This episode argues that the lane you're supposed to be in is the uncomfortable middle — and that staying there requires more self-awareness than either extreme.Topics covered: the old school versus new school parenting debate and why Robbie doesn't fully buy either side, why being a hypocrite as a parent is more common and more damaging than most people admit, how to hold firm boundaries while still treating your kids with respect and dignity, what discipline actually looks like when it comes from a place of love instead of frustration, and the conversation every parent should be having with themselves about what kind of home they're actually running versus the one they think they're running.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

When you're a kid, friendships just happen. You're thrown into the same room as other kids and you figure it out. When you're an adult — especially an adult who's moved away from where you grew up, has two kids, works full time, and coaches sports — making real friends is a completely different thing. And most people just quietly stop trying and call it being busy.Robbie opens this one with possibly the most memorable diaper story in TUF history — fair warning — before getting into something that's been genuinely on his mind: the slow drift away from real friendships that happens almost invisibly as life gets bigger and busier, and what he's trying to do about it before the drift becomes permanent.Topics covered: why adult friendships fade and why most people don't talk about it, what parenthood does to your social life that nobody prepares you for, Robbie's honest reflection on becoming more reclusive than he wants to be, the difference between having acquaintances and having actual friends, and what intentional friendship actually looks like when you're 37 with three kids and zero free time.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

There's a version of parenting where you're so focused on discipline and rules that your kids are well-behaved but secretly afraid of you. And there's a version where you're so focused on empathy and connection that your kids run the house. Robbie thinks both are missing the point — and in this episode he gets into what the middle actually looks like when you're living it, not just theorizing about it.This came out of the holidays — watching different parenting styles collide at family gatherings, seeing how kids respond differently to different approaches, and having some honest conversations with himself about where his own approach is working and where it isn't.Topics covered: why discipline without empathy creates compliance but not connection, why empathy without discipline creates chaos, what Robbie's own version of the balance looks like right now with his boys, how to present a united front with your partner even when you disagree on the approach, and why your kids are watching how you treat them as a blueprint for how to treat other people.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

It's 4am on Christmas Eve. Robbie's got a mile-long to-do list, a head full of congestion, and two kids who are absolutely losing their minds with excitement. He recorded this one anyway. Because it's Christmas and that's what you do.This is a short, lighthearted one — a quick holiday check-in, some honest reflection on a hard year that ended with some genuinely good news, and Robbie's definitive Christmas movie rankings. Yes, Muppet Christmas Carol is number one. He will not be taking questions.Topics covered: a brief honest reflection on the year and what's ahead, Robbie's top Christmas movies including Muppet Christmas Carol, Klaus, Home Alone, and a few older classics you may have missed, and a genuine Merry Christmas to everyone who's been listening. Short episode. Big holiday energy.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

There's a conversation happening in culture right now about fairness — about how standards have been unequal, how certain people have been held to higher expectations than others, and how we need to fix that. Robbie agrees with the problem. He just disagrees with the solution. Because the answer to unequal standards isn't to lower the bar for everyone. It's to raise it.This is a direct, unfiltered take on a cultural pattern Robbie sees everywhere — at home, at work, in parenting, in how we talk about men and women — and why grace and accountability aren't opposites. You can give yourself room to fail while still expecting more of yourself. Those things aren't in conflict. Most people just pick one and call it a day.Topics covered: why lowering standards to create equality is the wrong move, the specific ways Robbie sees men failing to raise their game as fathers and partners, the difference between giving yourself grace and giving yourself a pass, and why the most useful thing you can do right now is hold yourself to a higher standard — not a perfect one, just a higher one.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie was doom-scrolling on his birthday eve when a reel showed up claiming that if your marriage is hard, you married the wrong person. The account had 35,000 followers. He went down the rabbit hole. He disagreed with pretty much all of it. And then he recorded an episode about it.This isn't a rant against women or divorce or any of that. It's a direct pushback on a specific type of content that's become very common online — the idea that a good marriage should be effortless, that difficulty means incompatibility, and that modern women are better off alone. Robbie's been married over a decade. He has opinions.Topics covered: why "if it's hard you married the wrong person" is genuinely harmful advice, the real reason modern marriage is under more pressure than previous generations — and why that's not the same as being doomed, what Robbie actually believes about commitment and what it takes to make a marriage work long term, the things the anti-marriage content gets right versus where it completely misses, and what he'd tell a younger version of himself about choosing a partner.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie's back from Thanksgiving. He's tired, the holiday chaos is just getting started, there are birthdays and baby showers and Christmas and New Year's all stacking up, and he's recording this episode partly just to stay consistent and partly because he needed to process out loud. That's kind of the whole deal with this one.This is a shorter, more candid episode about the specific kind of frustration and overwhelm that hits during the holiday stretch — when everything is supposed to feel magical and you're mostly just exhausted. Robbie also gives some context on changes he made to the early podcast episodes and where the show is heading.Topics covered: why the holiday season hits differently when you're a parent and have actual responsibilities, processing overwhelm and frustration without letting it blow up on the people around you, why Robbie pulled some early episodes and where TUF Plus is heading, and an honest check-in from someone who's in the middle of the same holiday chaos you probably are right now.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Last week there was no episode. Not because nothing was recorded — Robbie sat down every single day, got five or ten minutes in, and deleted it. Every time. Because it wasn't right. Wasn't perfect. Didn't sound the way he'd imagined it. Until he realized that the inability to get out of his own way was the episode.This is one of the most honest episodes in the TUF catalog — about the vulnerability that goes into doing something creative in public, the specific fear of being seen as an "influencer" when you hate influencers, and why a first-grade music teacher telling him he couldn't sing might still be affecting the way he shows up today.Topics covered: what perfectionism actually looks like when it's blocking your creative output, why vulnerability is harder for people who pride themselves on not caring what others think, the Enneagram 8 problem of simultaneously projecting confidence and being terrified of being seen, what Robbie wants his kids to learn from watching him do something hard in public, and why the courage to try imperfectly is more valuable than the ability to do it perfectly.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie's pastor mentioned a "He Gets Us" ad that ran during a baseball game — "Umps are people too." It was a throwaway moment. It sent Robbie down a whole train of thought about watching parents absolutely lose their minds at little league umpires, the time he volunteered to ump a game of six-year-olds and nearly had an emotional breakdown, and what that says about how we treat people we've decided don't deserve basic respect.This one goes bigger than baseball. It's about a cultural pattern Robbie keeps noticing — the way political identity, social media aggression, and competitive tribalism have made it normal to treat other people like they're subhuman. And what it would actually look like to push back against that as a parent, as a person, and at the little league field.Topics covered: the specific way competitive sports bring out the worst in parents and what Robbie plans to do differently when his boys are old enough to play, why treating people with basic dignity isn't weakness — and isn't the same as treating everyone equally, the divide-and-conquer cultural machine that keeps everyone at each other's throats, and the surprisingly practical case for just being decent to the ump.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

It's Thanksgiving Eve. Robbie's recording this with a ton on his plate — literally and figuratively — and he's been thinking about what gratitude actually means when life has genuinely been hard. Not the Instagram version. Not the motivational poster version. The real version, where you've had a rough year and you're still trying to find the thing to be thankful for without gaslighting yourself about it.He also has strong opinions about Thanksgiving movies. Or more accurately, the complete lack of them. And the fact that Thanksgiving is technically just an intermission between Halloween and Christmas. He stands by all of this.Topics covered: the difference between gratitude and contentment and why both matter, what it actually looks like to be thankful in a year that was genuinely difficult, why Robbie thinks contentment is harder and more valuable than gratitude, the Thanksgiving movie problem and why the holiday will never compete with Christmas until Hollywood fixes it, and a genuine reflection on what's good even when a lot hasn't been.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie sits down with Myer Krah — ten-year military veteran, anti-terrorism specialist, dad of four boys including twins, and host of the Here4TheDads podcast — for a conversation that happened exactly the way the best ones do: two dads who just met, talking about things that actually matter, with no agenda and no filter.Myer found TUF through the algorithm, reached out almost immediately, and the two ended up on each other's shows the same week. This is the TUF side of that conversation — about the pivot from military life to fatherhood, why men lose the locker room conversations when they leave the locker room, and what it actually looks like to be a present, engaged dad when nobody taught you what that means.Topics covered: Myer's transition from a decade in the military to being a full-time dad and podcaster, why fatherhood was a bigger identity shift than anything he experienced in the service, what men stop talking about when they leave the environments that made honest conversation normal, raising four boys and what that does to you, and the shared mission behind both shows — giving dads a space to be real.👉 Connect with Myer: Follow @Here4TheDads on Instagram for dad tips, community events, and exclusive merch! Check out all his links below.Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/here4thedads/Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@Here4theDadsPodcast?app=desktop&sub_confirmation=1Linktree - https://linktr.ee/here4thedads?utm_source=linktree_profile_share&ltsid=23aaf450-7b24-49dd-8458-1058f847063fSend a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie recorded this one the morning it dropped, hadn't slept great, had a big interview episode coming the following week, and just wanted to check in honestly. Every year since 2020 has felt harder than the last. He used to wonder if that was just him getting older and more pessimistic. Now he thinks it's just true — life gets more complex, more expensive, more demanding as you accumulate responsibilities. And that's not a complaint. It's just reality.Short episode. Real thoughts. The kind of check-in that reminds you the person behind the mic is in the same mud as you are.Topics covered: why every year seems harder than the last and whether that's perception or reality, how becoming a parent changed Robbie's empathy for people who struggle with the basic demands of adult life, why the fact that life gets harder doesn't mean it gets worse, a brief honest reflection on the year and what's ahead, and a preview of the interview episode dropping the following week.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

It's the day after the election. Robbie doesn't care who you voted for. He does care that you voted. What he's tired of is the performative outrage, the virtue signaling, the people who post "get out and vote, doesn't matter who" and then spend the rest of the day calling the other side subhuman. He's exhausted by all of it. This episode is his honest debrief.This isn't a political episode. It's an episode about the cultural exhaustion that comes from living in a society where every four years the same cycle repeats — division, manipulation, media bias on both sides, and then everyone going back to their corners. Robbie falls somewhere in the political gray area and has opinions about why that's actually the more honest place to be.Topics covered: why Robbie considers himself politically homeless and what that actually means, the specific hypocrisy of "just vote" culture that drives him crazy, how media manipulation on both sides has gotten worse with AI and new technology, what the post-election period should actually look like if you want to move forward productively, and how to stop letting the political machine drain your mental energy every four years.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

It's Halloween Eve. Robbie's in an orange shirt. There's a skeleton mask on the bed behind him. His family has had decorations up since mid-September when it was still 110 degrees outside. He's been mapping the trick-or-treat route with his kids for weeks. He takes this holiday seriously and he is not embarrassed about it.This is a fun, seasonal episode that doubles as a real reflection on fear — the kind you enjoy at haunted houses, the kind that creeps in at 3am in a dark backyard, and the kind that comes with being responsible for little humans who are growing up faster than you're ready for.Topics covered: why Robbie and his wife are Halloween people and what that looks like with young kids, haunted houses, scary movies, and the specific kind of fear he actually enjoys, watching his two-year-old finally be old enough to knock on doors and say trick or treat, and the quieter reflection underneath the holiday fun about the passage of time as a parent.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie's second born was a sleep terrorist. Average sleep score for the first eight months: three and a half to four and a half hours a night. The first two weeks were closer to two. He's not saying this to scare you — he's saying it so you know he's earned the right to talk about this.This is a practical, real-world episode on sleep training, sleep schedules, and getting your kids to sleep long enough that you can actually function as a human being. Not a perfect scientific framework — just what worked for his family, what didn't, and why having some kind of system is better than having none.Topics covered: why sleep training gets a bad reputation and what it actually involves, the specific methods and schedules Robbie and his wife used and why they helped, sleep regressions and what to do when everything falls apart again, why your kids sleeping well is directly connected to you being a better parent, and the honest truth that no matter what you do you're going to lose some sleep — but there are ways to lose less of it.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie played football in high school. He's a Packers fan. He has cheeseheads in the background of his recording setup. He is not coming after football as a sport. He is coming after the specific version of football fandom where an entire Saturday and Sunday disappears into a couch and a screen while your family orbits around you waiting for the game to end.This is the episode that will probably make some dads defensive. Good. That means it landed. Robbie makes a direct, honest case for why the time football consumes — especially for dads with young kids — is worth examining before you defend it automatically. He's not saying stop watching. He's asking whether the current setup is actually working for your family.Topics covered: the time math of being a full college and NFL football fan and what that actually costs your family every single week, Robbie's personal experience with football and why his relationship with it changed after having kids, the difference between being a fan and letting a sport run your household schedule, how to still enjoy football without it becoming the organizing principle of your weekends, and the honest conversation most football-loving dads haven't had with their partners yet.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie is an Enneagram 8. His greatest fear is vulnerability. His deepest instinct is to be strong, invulnerable, and impossible to hurt. He knows intellectually that this is limiting him. His gut doesn't care. This episode is the honest tension between those two things — and what he's slowly, reluctantly figuring out about what strength actually means.This one cuts deeper than most TUF episodes. It's not advice — it's processing out loud. The internal conflict between the man who wants to be an iron fortress for his family and the man who knows that fortress is also keeping the people he loves from actually knowing him.Topics covered: what Enneagram 8 actually means and why it explains so much of how Robbie shows up, the specific ways protective walls that kept you safe when you were younger become obstacles when you're older, why vulnerability isn't weakness — and why Robbie has to keep reminding himself of that, the difference between being emotionally open and being a human puddle of feelings, and what it actually looks like to build doors in the walls instead of tearing them down entirely.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie was once at 315 pounds. He's been grinding — five days a week at the gym, cardio, 2400 calories max during the week — and still can't break below 270. He's not asking for sympathy. He's asking why the hell his body stopped cooperating sometime around age 30, and what he and every other dad over 35 is supposed to do about it.This is an honest, slightly frustrated episode about the specific challenge of staying healthy when you're older, busier, and your metabolism has apparently decided to take early retirement. No miracle solutions. No supplement ads. Just the real math of weight loss after 30 and why the mental game matters as much as the physical one.Topics covered: why weight loss after 30 is categorically different from weight loss in your 20s and what to do about it, Robbie's current approach including calorie counting, lifting and cardio, and the weekend flexibility that keeps him sane, the mental math he does before every food decision, why your physical health is directly connected to your patience as a parent, and the message to younger listeners — build the habits now before your body stops forgiving you for not having them.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Someone sent in a message about struggling with alcoholism for most of their adult life, getting sober, and now trying to rebuild relationships with adult kids and grandkids who grew up watching the destruction. They wanted Robbie's thoughts. He gave them — honestly and without sugarcoating it, which is the only way he knows how.Robbie is not an alcoholic and doesn't pretend to have that experience. But he's been a heavy drinker, has family members who struggle with it, and has a lot of real thoughts on recovery, trust, accountability, and what it actually takes to rebuild a relationship after you've spent years earning distrust. This one goes deeper than most.Topics covered: Robbie's honest history with alcohol from college binge drinking to becoming an occasional drinker as a dad, his thoughts on alcoholism as a disease versus a choice, what the recovery process looks like from the outside for families who lived through it, the hardest truth for someone trying to rebuild trust — it's not about you, it's about them, and why extending the olive branch repeatedly without expectation is the only real path forward.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Jeff Fajans reached out after seeing something Robbie posted about listening to Creedence Clearwater Revival with his kids and the way music connects generations. Jeff is a creative momentum coach, a music creator who makes kids music described by people in the industry as "Beastie Boys for babies," and a newly inducted member of the Recording Academy. He and Robbie sat down for the kind of conversation that actually goes somewhere.This is one of the best guest episodes in the TUF catalog — not because it's polished, but because both of them are genuinely figuring something out in real time. Robbie doesn't think of himself as a creative person. Jeff disagrees. The podcast itself is the counterargument.Topics covered: what creativity actually means when you strip away the art school definition, the five pillars for nurturing creativity in your kids starting from infancy, why exposing children to a wide variety of experiences is the foundation of everything, how to identify your child's creative strengths without projecting your own hopes onto them, why the podcast is a creative act even when Robbie doesn't feel like a creative person, and what Jeff's work as Mr. Boo Daddy is really about.Here are the links for Jeff and all the good work he is doing! Listen to MrBoodaddy on Spotify or Apple Music and follow on InstagramCreative Parenting: 5 Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Creativity (Medium Article)Discover Your Creative Vision. Free comprehensive guide: Bigger, Better, Bolder: The Ultimate Guide to Designing Your Best Year YetFollow Jeff on Instagram Mr. Boo Daddy IG****Apologies for the static sound on my audio, this was my first time doing a virtual interview.  On top of my technological incompetence, there were multiple lawnmowers and blowers in my neighborhood that day. ****Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

A parent lost custody of her kids, showed up at his son's school, threatened staff, went live on social media at a gun range shooting targets, tagged the school in the post, and sang a song about school shootings. His blood pressure is still elevated just talking about it. This episode starts there — in the specific, terrifying reality of what happened — and then goes somewhere more important.Because as soon as something like this happens, the conversation immediately collapses into politics. Guns. Gun control. Second Amendment. And Robbie thinks that collapse is exactly the problem — that the political noise is the red herring that keeps us from having the actual conversation about what's driving this and what to do about it.Topics covered: what happened at Robbie's son's school and the specific details that were so alarming, the surge of protective rage that comes with having a child in a threatened environment, why the gun debate as a political issue obscures the real conversation, mental health, social media attention-seeking, and the gap between threat assessment and actual action — and what parents can reasonably do to feel less helpless in a world where these things happen.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Welcome to “The Unhinged Father” podcast! 🎙️ In this trailer episode, discover what this podcast is all about and why it’s the perfect listen for millennial dads, young parents, and anyone navigating the chaos of modern life.Join me as I share real, unfiltered takes on fatherhood, personal growth, and the everyday struggles we all face. Whether you’re here for parenting tips, a good laugh, or just someone who gets it, this podcast is for you.In just a few minutes, you’ll learn what sets TUF apart—our commitment to tackling tough topics with honesty, humor, and a sense of community. Get a sneak peek into the kind of conversations we’ll be having and the value you can expect to find in each episode.Hit play, subscribe, and let’s journey together through the ups and downs of life, one episode at a time.Keywords: millennial dads, parenting podcast, modern fatherhood, personal growth, family life, dad tips, real talk, life advice, unfiltered discussions, humor in parenting.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie is not a ray of sunshine. He has a dark sense of humor, a dry delivery, and a natural gravitational pull toward the negative. He also genuinely wants to be a better person and live a better life. This episode is about the specific tension between those two things — and whether the dark humor and the cynicism are baggage he needs to drop or tools he needs to keep.Short episode, genuine question, no clean answer. The kind of honest check-in that makes TUF feel different from every podcast that always has the answer.Topics covered: Robbie's honest description of his default relationship with negativity and dark humor, why completely abandoning those things might not actually be the goal, the specific social media negativity spiral that's different from but just as dangerous as the perfectionism spiral, where the line between healthy dark humor and self-destructive negativity actually is, and the question he's genuinely still working out — can you move forward and bring some of the darkness with you?Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

An OG fan of the show — one of the people who encouraged Robbie to start the podcast in the first place — is about to have her first baby and asked for the unfiltered truth on what you actually need as a new parent. So he gave it to her. All of it. The products that actually help, the ones that are overhyped, and the two things nobody tells you about that matter more than any piece of gear you'll ever buy.This is a long one — fair warning — because once Robbie got going on baby monitors and the SNOO bassinet, he couldn't stop. But the second half, about grit and self-knowledge as a parent, is genuinely some of the most useful content in the TUF catalog.Topics covered: the specific products Robbie swears by including the Nanit monitor, DockATot, SNOO bassinet, Hatch sound machine, and more, the products that aren't worth it, the honest case for sleep training, and then the two non-negotiables for any parent — gumption and self-awareness. Why knowing what makes you tick matters more than any parenting book you'll ever read.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Robbie isn't going to tell you what happened. It's personal, it's his family's business, and it's not the point. What he will tell you is that it was significant, it was unexpected, and it forced him to sit in the backyard watching his kids play on a $10 splash pad with $2 Hot Wheels and ask himself the question: if we lost all of this stuff, would we be okay?The answer was yes. And that realization — arriving in the middle of real stress and real uncertainty — is the whole episode.Topics covered: how real adversity has a way of stripping away the noise and showing you what actually matters, why Robbie's kids were happier playing on $20 worth of stuff than they are with most of their toys, the phone as a distraction from the hard things that have to be faced anyway, what it looks like to be a stabilizing presence for your family when you're also scared, and why the people who can cause the most damage to regular families are often the ones at the top who face the least consequences for it.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather

Some guy on Reddit told Robbie he sounded like he'd achieved parental nirvana. Robbie wanted to punch him through the screen. Then he took a breath, re-read his own response, and realized the guy kind of had a point — he'd accidentally presented himself as someone who had it figured out. This episode is the honest correction of that impression.Nobody has it figured out. The perfect families on Instagram are fake. The winning-first culture America raised you in is setting you up to be terrified of failure. And failure — the actual, uncomfortable, publicly-visible kind — is the only real path to anything worth having. Robbie has made enough mistakes to know this from experience.Topics covered: why America's winner culture and social media perfectionism are a particularly toxic combination for anyone trying to grow, what Robbie's Reddit moment taught him about the gap between how we present ourselves and how we actually live, why you need to define what "winning at life" actually means for you before you can start moving toward it, the difference between fearing failure and learning from it, and why the journey — not the curated Instagram endpoint — is the only real thing.Send a message about the episode! Support the showhttps://linktr.ee/unhingedfather