This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life

Erica and Jahon are two artsy, nerdy, anglophone Montrealers. And today, we’re coming together for our special episode, Unhinged Ways to Learn French in Quebec. Join us for adventures in French stand-up comedy, cringe slam poetry, and becoming a Quebec Grey’s Anatomy superfan. We talk education, French immersion in Perth Ontario, reading in French, dating in French, hobbies in French, and more. Make sure to listen to the end for a riveting listener question from Girl Who Just Wants to French Some Dudes.Please note that this episode is in English, making it a wonderful start for learners of all levels. Wherever you are in your French journey, it’s never too late and it’s always worth it.Jahon Mousavi-Torbatiis a talented concept artist and regular artist who has made a recent pivot to storytelling and stand-up comedy. Jahon has great enthusiasm for urban transit, kobo e-readers, pineapples, and ending doom-scrolling for all time. In general, Jahon is  someone who exudes great enthusiasm for just about everything. Also, he is Erica J. Schmidt’s boyfriend!Erica J. Schmidt grew up in Perth Ontario, where she enjoyed half-day immersion from grade five to eight. Then there was a touch of extended French in high school, but odds for mastery were not in her favour. Despite this, she moved to Montreal and proceeded to become a French-to-English translator. These days, she is proud to be able to read full novels in French with the help of her trusty kobo.Jahon Mousavi-Torbati on the InterwebsFollow Jahon on Instagram @jahonartCheck out his Concept Art Drink and Draw: @conceptartdrinkanddrawJahon’s Quebec fantasy illustration projectJahon on LinkedInJahon’s Website: artstation.comErica J. Schmidt on the InterwebsInstagram: @erica.j.schmidtSubstack: @ericajschmidtWebsite: ericajschmidt.comThe Donate ButtonIf you would like to be a beta reader for one of Erica’s two manuscripts, please get in touch! THANK YOU SO MUCH!How to Learn French in Quebec: Art, Books, and ResourcesC’est L’Halloween (Est-ce que tu as peur? Oui, oui, oui, oui, oui!)Watch STAT on icitouttv‍ ‍Book: 99 Francs, a novel by Frédéric BeigbederBook: Spoken Here: Travels among Threatened LanguagesLOVING SHOUT-OUT TO OUR FABULOUS TEACHERSFrom Stewart School, Perth Ontario: Mme. Shelley Fillipoff, Mme. Renée Capello, Mme. Denise Baker, Mme. Danielle Normandin‍From John Abbot College, Saint-Anne-de-Bellevue:Frédéric Laganière‍How to Learn French in Quebec: Timestamps00:00:00 Theme Song00:00:34 Introduction to  VIP guest, Jahon and his extra special episode, Unhinged Ways to Learn French in Quebec. Teasers about Jahon’s slam poetry and fun facts on how to pronounce poutine. Disclaimer about how this episode will NOT address language politics00:02:54 Official Bio: Jahon Mousavi-Torbati00:04:20 Jahon’s incredibly biased bio for host Erica J. Schmidt. Slide into Erica’s DMs if you’d like to be a beta reader for one of her manuscripts.00:07:17 Erica and Jahon’s linguistic origins. Jahon was Montréal born and raised by French-Canadian mother and Persian father who both spoke English at home. He went to French immersion school and eventually was accepted to a French program at university.00:11:12 Erica grew up in the metropolis of Perth Ontario. Her French career started with core French songs like C’est l’Halloween before she embarked on four years of half-day immersion from grade 5 to grade 8.00:16:55 Jahon feels he did not read enough books in French. Shout-out to his teacher Frederic who had him read the book 99 Francs and dessicrate it00:18:27 How Jahon’s father ended up in Quebec, and his French story. The moments Jahon realized that his French was not at an adequate level. Jahon reads book Spoken Here and commits to improving his French and he applies to Université de Montréal.   00:23:11 The moments when Erica realized her French was not at an adequate level. 00:24:54 Erica binge watches STAT on icitoutv. (Quebec’s Grey’s Anatomy)00:28:50 The first time Jahon was referred to as le Quebecois, and how that became part of his identity.00:32:19 Deeper into unconventional ways Jahon and Erica learned French, especially improv and stand-up comedy.00:39:19 Erica explains Shadowing, the technique she used while practising to become an interpreter. It involves listening to the language you are practising and then repeating the words while you are still listening to what comes next.00:41:45 One last conventional way to learn French: Read! And ideally get a Kobo which lets you take books out of the library and look up words without checking your phone.00:44:19 Listener Question from A Girl Who Just Wants to French Some Dudes00:58:02 Always read books with your girlfriend. Stay tuned for an exciting surprise on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life59:22 Thanks and wrap-up. Follow Jahon and Erica on the Interwebs. Go to Jahon’s Concept Art Drink and Draw. Never give up on your French. LOVE YOU, BYE!!!

For our first-ever encore episode, we have Mary Adamson Owen, otherwise known as the best grandma in the world. Grandma was my inaugural podcast guest and reason for starting This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life.After a long, strange, and beautiful life, Grandma died on November 14, 2025. She was 99. To honour her memory, I am reposting the extra special interview we did back in March of 2023. We recorded from her tiny room in long-term care, where she had just moved in. Unsurprisingly, she was an all-star guest. It is such a treasure to be able to listen to her voice and her stories now that she is “gone,” whatever that means.I have added an only slightly teary intro and some VIP footage at the end. Check out the video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/PQACTE_CduATo learn more about Mary’s life, you can read her obituaryor watch a wonderfully extensive interview series, created by the Crestwood history project, created when Grandma was 98! Bravo, Grandma! We miss you so much.Thank you everyone for listening.Love, EricaInstagram: @erica.j.schmidtSubstack: ericajschmidt.substack.comWebsite: ericajschmidt.comThe Donate Button. Thank you so much!

Today we have a writer’s writer’s talk with the accomplished author and poet Rebecca Păpucaru. Rebecca has published an impressive variety of poetry and fiction, and she is someone who works very hard and long on her creative projects. Legend has it that some of her published poems and her recent novel have taken years (and even a decade or so) to make them what they are today. So,if you’re someone who’s been toiling on a project forever, if you feel like you’re stuck, or even if you haven’t started yet, this interview is bursting with hope, tips, and inspiration.Bio: Rebecca Păpucaru (also known as Rebecca Schwarz)Growing up in Montréal, Rebecca Păpucaru was always the English teacher’s pet. During her youth, she won second prize in an Archie comics’ writing contest. Her essay on how to change the world beat out hundreds of American and Canadian competitors. In 2018, her collection of poems, The Panic Room won the Canadian Jewish Literary Award for Poetry. Her novella Yentas won the Malahat Review’s 2020 Novella Prize. And her recent novel, As Good a Place as Any has met great acclaim, making all kinds of lists including the CBC’s selection for Best Canadian Fiction Book of 2025. As Good a Place as Any tells the story of 16-year-old Paulina, who is forced to flee Chile with her brother after the 1973 coup. They land in Toronto, and no spoilers but Paulina has a much better time than her brother Ernesto does, and we get to read about her unlikely quest for freedom as a queer woman and aspiring actress. It’s a historically relevant, emotionally compelling coming-of-age novel. You’ll love it as much as you’ll love this episode! Thank you, Rebecca for coming on the show. Follow Rebecca on Instagram: @rebeccapapucaruwriterRebecca’s author page on FacebookBook of Poetry: The Panic Room (Nightwood Editions)Novel: As Good a Place as Any (Guernica Editions)Erica on Instagram: @erica.j.schmidtErica on Substack (new!): @ericajschmidtErica's website: ericajschmidt.comFull shownotes: ericajschmidt.com/podcast/as-good-a-place-as-any-rebecca-papucaruIf you enjoyed this podcast, you may also enjoy:Montréal’s Favourite Anita Anand (Author, Translator, Peace Seeker):Apple Podcasts SpotifyTrue Stories to Save Your Life with Nisha Coleman:AppleSpotifyCuriosity with Michelle Syba (Author of End Times):AppleSpotifyRebecca Păpucaru on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life (Timestamps)00:00:00 Theme Song, Intro + Rebecca Păpucaru’s bio00:03:50 Rebecca gushes about Erica’s squatty potty set-up in her bathroom. Erica: You want to give birth and take a dump in a squat.Rebecca and Erica talk ergonomic redemption and the importance of internal plumbing as you age.00:08:00 Rebecca was born Rebecca Schwarz but prefers her father’s family name Păpucaru, which he changed when he came to Canada.  “If I’m honest, my decision to publish under that name is a certain internalized self-loathing. But on the other hand, I really like the sound of it.”00:12:05 Writer’s Block Trick: If you don’t have money for a writer’s course, just write an essay on your name.00:12:47 Rebecca Păpucaru’s creative origins and how she became a writer (Early journals, lots of reading, and winning the Archie comic writing contest)00:16:55 Theatre school at Dawson college and why Rebecca did not become an actor00:19:52 The call to read. University of TorontoRebecca is captivated by Sylvia Plath and decides she wants to write poems. Ends up studying English at U of T. She writes poem but they rarely submits them anywhere. Then her uncle dies when she is 38, and she vows to take the writing thing seriously. 00:27:31 What is most natural, writing poetry or fiction?00:31:05 The tension between commercial and literary fiction and the pressure to write something high-brow and cerebral. 00:32:03 Elevator pitch for As Good a Place as Any00:36:19 Did Rebecca do research to authentically and respectfully depict the experience of the queer Chilean woman? Rebecca describes her process and self-doubt, and the trip where she met her main character.00:42:37 A sign that you’re really stuck with your writing.00:43:29 Writing through shit in the dark and/or How to get into a flow state and get your characters to talk to you00:48:30 Rebecca Păpucaru’s Morning and Creative Routines00:53:31 Rebecca Păpucaru’s Spectacular TED talk00:54:59 More writing tips! How to write or not write and not hate yourself01:48:00 Rebecca Păpucaru’s Cleaning Routine01:03:40 How to read outside reading bubbles and Instagram lists. Reading tips and recs01:07:59 Wrap-up and where to find Rebecca online and buy her bookTo support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

“An artist is someone who is celebrated for being themselves. A professional artist is someone who is paid for being themselves.”“It takes as much creativity to make it work as it does to make the work.”—Gretchen AndrewGretchen Andrew is a viral painter, hacker, and creator of the award-winning FaceTune Portraits, a series of oil paintings that “reveal the hidden scars of social media filters.”Two years after college, Gretchen quit her so-called “dream job” at Google and set out on a performative experiment to become an artist. It was a wild success! Most recently, two paintings from Gretchen’s Facetune Portrait series have been put forth for permanent acquisition at the Whitney. These provocative portraits criticize how AI and plastic surgery are homogenizing and dictating our collective beauty standards. The world needs this series and it was a joy to talk to Gretchen about creativity, algorithms, morning routines, robots, Botox, and how to become an artist. Follow Gretchen on Instagram @gretchenandrewGretchen Andrew’s website: gretchenandrew.comErica on Instagram: @erica.j.schmidtErica on Substack (new!): @ericajschmidtErica's website: ericajschmidt.com Full shownotes: ericajschmidt.com/podcast/artist-gretchen-andrewGretchen Andrew on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life00:00:00 Intro: Gretchen on today’s unreasonable beauty standards00:01:44 Theme song plus Gretchen’s bio and riveting banter on Botox00:06:04 Gretchen gets a running scholarship at Boston College. Landed a job at Google, which she quit after two years to illegally move into her art studio. How did this happen and how did it go?00:09:39 Using the Internet as a force for good. Trying to make it as an artist in San Francisco00:16:30 Gretchen’s take on the term “self-taught.” How she acquired the technical skills she needed without getting an MFA. How she found mentors like Billy Childs00:21:00 Gretchen’s artistic origins. Did she draw as a child? Why art now? Gretchen’s dream of becoming part of the art world. Making your life one beautiful piece of art. 00:23:57 Promoting yourself as an artist. “It takes as much creativity to make it work as it does to make the work.” Networking, snail-mail thank you cards. Making it fun.00:29:52 Using SEO to hack the search term “Next American president” with her vision boards during the 2020 election. How to make the Internet “a global subconscious manifestation machine.”00:36:23 Gretchen’s morning routine. It involves setting an intention in front of the mirror at 4:55 a.m. She records herself and listens to the recording throughout the day. Seems like it is working?00:40:21 Robotics and Gretchen’s Facetune Portraits. More on our society’s impossible beauty standards, the effects of AI filters, the cost of Botox, fillers and other interventions. 00:40:34 Specifics about the mechanics of Gretchen’s robots. Check out Erica’ smash-hit YouTube channel for footage!00:51:41 How the Facetune project has affected Gretchen personally in terms of how she processes appearance expectations for women. More on Botox, haha, and does EMDR therapy make you prettier?01:04:42 Gretchen Andrew’s creative routine. It can vary by week, month, or even two-to-five year period. And she has stop watches to keep track of it all.  01:13:08 Gretchen Andrew’s cleaning routine. Her house is spotless! And she hits Inbox Zero every afternoon. What a surprise.01:15:37 Gretchen Andrew’s spectacular TED talk. Listen to the end for the title and topic!01:16:25 Wrap-up and closing theme song. Sing or dance along. Thank you so much, Gretchen. What a blast and an honour. If you enjoyed this episode, you might also like: How to Be a Writer with Kyle Stevenson, Making It Fun with Mary Owen, and Moments of Joy with Al Lafrance.To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Jessica O’Reilly is a hilariously unconventional writer, digital nomad, YouTuber, and workout queen. Her YouTube channel, Comfort Is For Wimps dives deep into her life as a digital nomad—couch-surfing in Afghanistan, checking out Medellin’s love hotels, and babysitting rich people’s pets in lieu of rent. Along the way, she examines the disparities in the cost of living between countries, passes the mic to locals, and through it all, rocks a splendid sense of humour. Hit up her Instagram for zingers like, “I don’t fall in love. I audition for the role of ‘lesson I had to learn the hard way.’” Jessica O’Reilly is the perfect complement to your Instagram relationship coach. Make sure to listen to the end for the stellar advice she gives to “Should I LTR or Should I Bounce.” A committed digital nomad falls in love in a city he does not fancy. It’s the deepest connection he’s ever had, but she can’t follow him around the world. What should he do? Jessica and Erica can’t fix it—but we have thoughts.Subscribe to Jessica’s YouTube Channel @comfortisforwimpsFollow Jessica on Instagram @comfortisforwimpsErica on Instagram: @erica.j.schmidtErica on Substack (new!): @ericajschmidtErica's website: ericajschmidt.comErica’s Interview with Jessica O’Reilly from Comfort Is For Wimps00:00:00 This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life Theme Song + Jessica O’Reilly’s bio 00:03:06 How Jessica and Erica met in Varanasi, India00:06:12 Jessica’s Motto and YouTube channel, Comfort Is For Wimps00:10:48 Is confidence fake it til you make it? 00:13:00 How to Solve the Problem of Paying Rent00:20:44 What is a digital nomad? Are you a digital nomad? The challenge of the day job, monetizing your joy and art, etc.00:28:23 Staying healthy and reasonably sane while travelling. Jetlag hacks, packing cubes, workout schedules and more.00:37:05 Losing your job and finding your niche 00:41:38 Friendship and Romance on the Road. Is it lonely? (Yes.)00:48:05 Humour, self deprecation and self-help00:51:25 Listener question: Do I LTR or do I bounce? A lovestruck digital nomad wonders if he should stick around in a city he doesn’t love for the first real connection he has felt in a while. 00:55:00 Freedom in commitment 01:03:14 Jessica O’Reilly’s Routines and A+ workout habits:01:05:29 Jessica O’Reilly’s Spectacular TED talk01:07:58 Wrap-up and final theme songListener Question from Do I LTR or Do I Bounce?Dear Jessica and Erica,I’ve been a digital nomad for almost a year now. I totally love it! In general, I’ve tried to stay away from serious relationships that could cost me my freedom.However, I recently met a local during my travels, and suddenly I’m head over heels in love. I’ve never managed to connect with someone like this, and it feels awesome. We’ve been hanging out for four weeks now which is way longer than I’d tend to stay somewhere. Now the tricky part is that I want to continue my nomadic lifestyle whereas she wants to stay. She doesn’t have the kind of lifestyle that lets her travel for much longer than a couple weeks at a time, barely a couple of times per year, and never without tons of planning. She has a job that isn’t mobile, a house, and even a dog. I get that this is what a lot of people want in their lives. But it’s not what I want. At least not right now.I’d consider staying a bit longer, but honestly, I don’t really like her city. It’s her I love. I don’t know how to navigate my love for her with my dream of living a location-independent lifestyle. I worry I’m just a selfish avoidant jerk with a closed heart. Do you have any experience with this? Should I extend my stay and see what happens? What do you think I should do?Love, Do I LTR or Do I BounceIf you enjoyed this episode, you might also like: How to Be a Writer with Kyle Stevenson, ChatGPT Is My Therapist, and Funemployment with Erica J. Schmidt.To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

There is more than one famous Anita Anand, but this Anita Anand is the best. She is a Montreal-based author, literary translator, language teacher, and cherished guest at Erica’s ukulele parties. All the while, she yearns for peace on earth and a free Palestine!You must read her books! Her novel, A Convergence of Solitudes was a finalist for the 2022 Paragraphe Hugh MacLennan Prize for Fiction. And her first book, Swing in the House and Other Storieswon the 2015 Quebec Writer’s Federation Concordia University First Book Award. Anita’s fiction is as charming as she is, featuring delightful characters who are often in the midst of what Anita calls, “a minority’s predicament.” In the various neighbourhoods of her childhood, Anita was always the only girl her age of Indian origin. As such, Anita grew up quite familiar with the “minority’s predicament.” She believes this experience was pivotal in helping her to become a writer, but she’d also like to help bridge the gap of understanding that people of visible minorities experience every day.It was such a joy to have Anita on the podcast. Make sure to listen to the end for a universally relevant listener question and a five-star ukulele segment with Anita on guitar. Links and ResourcesAnita’s website: https://anitaanand.carrd.co/Anita on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ms.anitaanand/Erica on Instagram: @erica.j.schmidtErica's website: ericajschmidt.comFull shownotes at ericajschmidt.com/podcast.anita-anand-montreal-authorVERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Me, Anita Anand, Nisha Coleman, and just about all of my guests are HORRIFIED by the genocide happening in Gaza. The situation is tragic and unfathomable, but there are concrete actions you can take!Concrete Steps for Palestine - Write letters to the other Anita Anand, Canada’s minister of defence - Follow @yousaama on Instagram. Yousaama shares insightful, philosophical, along with links to emergency aid campaigns at chuffed.org.Two Great Options:Rapid Relief for Displaced Families and ChildrenThe Zaynab Project:A women-led, 501(c)(3) registered nonprofit delivering critical aid to families and orphaned children across Gaza. Now’s the time to donate! Follow Yousaama and other Free Palestine activists, give what you can, read about Palestine, talk about Palestine, share stories, be brave, do not fall into despair. xoxoxoxoxo.Erica’s Interview with the Best Anita Anand00:00 This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeTheme Song + and Anita Anand’s bio00:02:24 How to go from “I have a book inside of me” to actually writing the book00:05:35 What about getting published?00:12:13 The “perfect novel” that became the title story in her collection “Swing in the House”00:13:05 Elevator pitch for The Convergence of Solitudes00:16:58 Inspiration of Serge Fiore in the novel. Un Musicien parmi les autres00:19:05 Anita calls Australian journalist “stolen” from Vietnam and turns her into a character (with her permission). Should you always ask people you write about for their permission?00:22:51 How being an outsider has helped Anita’s writing.00:26:41 Why Anita has decided not to write another book and focus on literary translation and guitar.00:31:23 Support Palestinian families by following @yousaama on Instagram. Yousaama posts heartfelt, insightful updates, and the latest in urgent aid campaigns on chuffed.org00:34:15 Learning guitar00:35:04 Writing routines and accountability00:36:58 Listener Question from Losing My Moji for My Sweet Slovenly Boyfriend. His partner’s apartment gives him the Ick. Is this a dealbreaker?00:57:19 The title and topic of Anita Anand’s spectacular TED talk.00:01:01:07 Half-bad Ukulele Segment:Drivin' on 9 by The Breeders00:01:04:47 Wrap-up and Closing Theme SongThank you so much, Anita! And thank you everyone for listening and hitting up these shownotes.  LISTENER QUESTION FROM LOSING MY MOJO FOR MY SWEET AND SLOVENLY BOYFRIENDDear Anita and Erica,I’m a gay 33-year-old, almost a year into a relationship with a dude who, in theory, makes me incredibly happy. He’s hilarious and kind and attentive to my emotional needs in ways no partner has ever been for me before. Historically, our sex life has been great, and we’re talking about taking next steps like moving in together and even marriage. Earlier in the relationship, I was thrilled about all these conversations. But lately, I’ve started to freeze up. From what I can tell, the main reason is truly embarrassing. Here’s the issue: His apartment gives me the ICK.I put a great deal of effort into taking care of my home. I clean regularly and have set up my space with colours and furniture and art that make me feel calm, organized, and safe. When we first got together, we spent all our time at my place, so all was well But we’ve started going back and forth more, and I find I feel uncomfortable and gross when I stay at his frat-boy digs. He thinks doing the dishes (and cleaning the bathroom and making the bed and doing laundry) are optional chores you can pull off when you’re in the mood. He thinks AC/DC posters and milk crates are acceptable home décor. Worst of all, he has too many cats, and not enough litter boxes, so the smell is completely hit or miss.I feel shallow! This guy is so sweet, and yet basic hygiene and aesthetics don’t seem to occur to him. Also, it could be neurodiversity or ingrained hoarding or trauma that make it impossible for him to live differently.When he does clean up, I shower him with compliments to try and train him to take up better habits. But then the next time I come, the sheets aren’t changed, the garbage is overflowing, and I have to hold my breath until my system gets used to the cat pee in the air. Last week we were out in his neighbourhood and he invited our mutual friends to his place, even though it was its usual disaster. I was appalled that he thought it was okay to host people he cared about in a hazmat situation. After this evening, I totally shut down and withheld intimacy for the weekend.Am I an asshole? Is this a dealbreaker? Do you think a more constructive intervention is allowed? What would you do?Love, Losing My Moji for My Sweet Slovenly BoyfriendAnd if you enjoyed this episode, you might also like: How to Be a Writer with Kyle Stevenson, True Stories to Save Your Life with Nisha Coleman, and Curiosity with Michelle Syba (Author of End Times).To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

It was my honour to welcome Luke Anderson to This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life! Luke Anderson is a speaker, singer, dancer, harmonica player, accessibility advocate, and athlete of the body turned athlete of the spirit. He is relatively famous for co-founding the revolutionary StopGap Foundation, a registered charity that builds bright and beautiful ramps across Toronto and North America. StopGap’s mission is to “bring people together to take practical steps to make spaces more accessible.”I think about this interview every day. Please enjoy! Luke Anderson: “I’ve developed a way of life that recognizes the possibilities of what I have now. And the way that I’ve chosen to recognize my physical situation right now is that, at the time of my injury... I was experiencing a piece of the pie of life. That was my periphery, that was my field of view, a slice of the pie of life. And because of the pie of life. And because of my injury and it helping me broaden my perspective, I’m now able to see a new slice of that pie of life. So, that kind of speaks to what I was saying... to see that moment, that injury I sustained on October 27, 2002 as a gift. It gifted me an opportunity to see life through a new lens.” Links and ResourcesLuke Anderson on Instagram: @lukewanders_onThe StopGap Foundation: stopgap.ca@stopgapfoundationStopGap on HotDocs: Stop Gap MeasureStopGap, The Luke Anderson Story: Watch on YouTubeLuke's Harmonica Teacher Nico TysonErica on Instagram: @erica.j.schmidtErica's website: ericajschmidt.comErica's Interview with Luke Anderson00:00:00 Riveting clips from Luke Anderson’s Interview. Watch and understand immediately why you MUST listen to the end. 00:01:48 This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeTheme Song + Luke Anderson’s bio 00:04:55 Language in the world of disabilities. How to empower, connect, remove barriers, and create a sense of possibility? 00:12:13 Living with a high-level spinal cord injury. Luke’s physical experience and need for assistance 00:18:08 Athlete of the body turned athlete of the spirit. An afternoon of mountain biking that would become Luke’s Day of Rebirth 00:28:06 The inner knowing that came over Luke soon after the accident. How this mysterious calm would help him help his friend Johnny save his life. 00:31:48 Early days at the spinal rehab centre. Did Luke every imagine himself beating the odds and find the cure to spinal cord injuries? 00:35:39 Navigating grief after injury. Climbing the ladder of consciousness and growing skills of patience, acceptance, empathy, compassion. Learning to embrace the grief and sadness when it comes up. 00:41:43 Erica asks Luke for wisdom on emotional regulation, among her life’s greatest challenges 00:49:56 How to find meaning and purpose in the face of grief and loss.00:54:52 Friendships and dating when you have a disability. On being a serial online dater, navigating relationships new and old, and transcending rom-com stereotypes. 01:02:02 Dating with a disability continued. Whether to disclose your disability on the apps. People with specific preferences for dating people with disability. Feedback and insight from Luke’s past partners. 01:13:18 Meditation to feel more. And invigorating a fading life force. 01:20:16 Everything StopGap. Bulding ramps and perspective. Transforming despair and frustration into creativity: How the StopGap Foundation was born 01:30:33 Luke Anderson’s first spectacular TED TALK, stage fright, and what's on for Luke's TED talk 2.0 01:38:46 Record-breaking harmonica playing on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. Luke rewrites the theme song and it’s awesome. 01:43:29 Final credits and wrap-up.THANK YOU SO MUCH, LUKE ANDERSON! THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR LISTENING! LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!And if you enjoyed this episode, you might also like: No Surrender with Hollis Peirce,How to Be a Writer with Kyle Stevenson, and Stories from L'Arche with Jimmy and IsabelleTo support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Today my guest is my super cool, ultra fit, deeply compassionate and hilarious friend and creative genius Kyle Stevenson. I met Kyle during my year one playwriting class in which he played the leading man, The Vegan Life Coach in the staged reading of my debut play, She Is Not Catholic, She Is Vegetarian. And he nailed it. For years, Kyle and I ate lentils and kale and piles of impossibly healthy food at The People’s Potato. Over multiple free lunches we discussed all our favourite topics, namely sex, anxiety, creativity, yoga cults, butt exercises, therapy, and how to make it as a writer. When we grew up, we would often convene in various playgrounds in Toronto to get caught up on the latest in Gay Husbands, deadlifting regimes, and what we’re supposed to be doing with our lives. Kyle is famous for founding the wildly successful online pandemic workout class, Cyber-Fit, also known as Push-up Class. He has been a devoted scriptwriter for decades and for years, he has been my dream guest. This episode is my longest one yet but totally worth it! You’ll be a different person at the end than you were at the beginning. That’s what happened to me and Kyle!Also, there’s a blog version of the listener question from Working to Live While My Boyfriend Works to the Point of Self-Destruction.Kyle says that blogs are making a comeback, so please check it out. You can read it here! Infinite thanks!Chapters(Full shownotes at www.ericajschmidt.com/podcast/how-to-be-a-writer-with-kyle-stevenson)(00:00:00) Intro + theme song + Kyle’s bio(00:02:36) How Kyle and Erica were anointed with the idea that we would transform our exquisite gifts and innate potential into a spectacular TED talk and the world would be totally delighted about it. (00:04:50) “Absolutely from a young age I was like, why would you not achieve your wild dreams and be recognized and lauded by the world by just doing super great things that everyone agrees is very very impressive. Nothing else made sense to me.”(Kyle thinks it is more embarrassing to have self-identified as this person of promise as opposed to Erica whose life great mythology was forever altered when she skipped grade two.)(00:07:48) Erica’s thoughts on Special Person Syndrome: “I always just thought that I was supposed to get the main part… like in the grade one Halloween concert, I was incensed if I didn’t get to be the head pumpkin. (00:08:55) Kyle’s first literary influence: Bruce Coville’s My Teacher Is An Alien (grade four)“So then you read a lot. And then, just whatever you’re doing, you’re kind of like, well, what if I did that.” (00:10:00) How it was easier to be a star when we lived in villages of 75 humans. Kyle on finding your way to excel in a small group: “By middle school, my goal for an English essay was not an A, but I considered it a failure if our teacher didn’t use my essay as an example for the other class.”Erica: “Pressure!”(00:13:17) Why is it so hard to enjoy the things you are good at for their own sake?(00:14:51) Did Kyle start writing seriously in grade seven?Kyle: “I would dispute the term serious… The desire to write came pretty early. Like I started a lot of journals in elementary school… But I don’t know if that was about, oh I love to put the words down, at the time I think it was more, like my life is so big and my emotions are so powerful. And it’s more a way to document than to write a great lit novel. Like I’ve got to keep track of the incredible, the ins and outs of my life. Like this record will be useful one day. Which is so embarrassing! But I know I’m not alone, I know we’re just out there being narcissists…”(00:18:43) On being a loveable person with a big fan club. What is the role of people pleasing and conflict aversion in all this? Where is the model for an ability to make friends as integral to an important life?(00:25:00) Kyle’s early visions of creative success and what it means to have an important life“I imagined success to be an end to the wondering of like, do I matter, am I important. Maybe more than anything else, you’re like, I hope everyone agrees that I’m important and then I’ll  have to stop wondering myself. And when that clicks into whatever you do, that’s when things get way less fun.”“At the end of your life, I can’t imagine you’ll wish, I wish I’d spent more time wondering if I mattered… I could have been doing something way more memorable… that mattered or not. I could have had one more ice cream cone, or went down the slide one more time. But of course the human mind, it cares not for what will matter later. It’s very pressed for what matters right now.”(00:26:52) Kyle’s educational path from linguistics and Old English to Creative Writing at Concordia University. He decides that writing is his dream and proceeds to move into a house with ten people, party hard, and work on his short stories. “I’ve never been good at starting simple.” The case for sticking with sticking with a beginning, middle, and end, and calling it a day. (00:30:28) Creative Writing at Concordia UniversityMaking school and writing the focus of your life“You keep telling yourself you’re gonna do this thing. And now, it’s going to be your job.” (00:36:59) Writing routine after university(00:40:24) When was it too late to make it as a blogger plus Kyle’s writing advice from 2011.  (00:44:54) “I have to earn my place on this earth and the only way to do that is writing.” On feeling behind on your life at age 27. (00:47:07) Every writing project is going to have to face and stand up to a bunch of different yous. (00:49:48) How to accept that the first draft is a throwaway, vomit draft. Erica and Kyle find this physically painful. (00:53:04) The austere writing routine in the water closet, the importance of taking writing brick by brick and letting go of heroic effort.Erica: “Why do we think writers are heros? Like the people taking kids to the park on leashes every day, those are the heroes. I mean whatever, be a writer. But it’s so dramatic.”(00:57:30) Getting out of a writer’s slump, working out like crazy, and questioning whether becoming a tv writer was the gold star he always dreamed of.(01:01:34) Kyle writes an essay and suddenly sees himself in the main character of Whiplash.(01:06:04) Kyle is applying to become a therapist. What does it even mean to be a successful writer.(01:14:48) Dude at Concordia who said: “Some people want to be writers and some people want to want to be writers.”Erica figured out who it was—Andrew Battershill. He’s three books in. He fucking did it!(01:16:29) Role of exercise in Kyle’s writing routine and the rest of his life. (Long live Cyber-fit!)“I don’t think I can understate how important it is… it allowed me to find a consistency that I’d never found before.”(01:23:53) Epic Listener Question from Working to Live While My Boyfriend Works to the Point of Self-Destruction. Listen to this whole thing! What wise advice! Our Credentials:Erica – 10 going on 11 months of romance this decade. Instagram PhD in relationships thanks to Jillian TurekiKyle – 17 years and counting with the stunning and delightful Brittney.  En route to therapy school. (01:56:39) Kyle’s spectacular TED talk. Something about accepting failure(01:58:21) Half-bad ukulele segment. Living on a prayer. Incredibly special. (02:02:24) THE END, finally. Follow Kyle onYouTube at Public Access TV Writing.

An interview with Nisha Coleman—I have only been dreaming of this since I started the podcast. At long last, we welcome Nisha to This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. Nisha is a superstar in the Montreal artist and storytelling community. We all know and love her as an accomplished author, actor, translator, storyteller, and master of the one-woman show.It all started on a swamp in rural Ontario. Born to hippie parents with minimal TV, Nisha learned how to make her own stories and games. Though she was a bashful child, Nisha grew up to discover the power of telling the truth.Secret teenage journals transformed into the magnificent storytelling performances she brings us today.As wars rage on our melting planet, it’s a hard time for sensitive creative souls. Nisha opens up about her struggles with mental health, her grief for our suffering earth, the genocide in Palestine, and the redemption she finds in art, learning, and community. But despite the heavy topics, our conversation is full of giggles and gentle wisdom. Listen to the end for Nisha’s coveted advice on learning a language, reigniting the creative spark, plus a pile of inspiring routines that sometimes involve vacuuming.Thank you so much, Nisha. This was as wonderful as I imagined.CONTENT WARNING: Discussion of mental health struggles, death fantasies, and suicidal ideation.Full shownotes at ericajschmidt.com/podcast/true-stories-to-save-the-world-with-nisha-colemanLinks and ResourcesFollow Nisha on Instagram @nishacolemanand check out her website at nishacoleman.com.Buy Nisha Coleman’s children’s book, Dear Humans: A Letter from the AnimalsNisha’s teenage journals on Grownups Read Things They Wrote as Kids: “Puberty has taken her!”Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.If you enjoyed this episode, you might also enjoy Chill Creative Flow With Jeff Gandell, Crochet for Peace with Montréal’s Most Adorable and Edgy Comedian (and Winner of Best Baby Face), Shosho Abotouk, and Painting Boundaries with Bean Nunnerley. Lydia Davis Daily Journalling Practice: Every day write down seven things you noticed, seven things you did, one thing you heard, plus a little doodle. Listener Question from Writer’s Block Survivor Actually Stuck This TimeDear Nisha and Erica,For the past six months, I’ve been in the worst creative rut of my life, and I don’t know how to get out of it. Back in the fall, I released my first album, but since then I’ve only managed to finish one song — maybe six minutes of music total — even though I’ve been working almost every day. I usually write slow, but this has been really discouraging.Not long after I launched my album, I lost a close friend, and I guess I kind of fell into a depression. While I’ve written through hard times before, this time it feels different. I keep generating little ideas, but they all seem terrible, and now I’m starting to wonder if I’ve just lost the spark. I was hoping to release another album by next year, but now I’m doubting whether I’ll ever get there, or if music composition is just over for me.Have you ever gone through a stretch like this, where the well just feels empty? If so, what helped you find your way back?Love, Writer’s Block Survivor Actually Stuck This Time.Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Today’s guest is the bright light, podcast host, historian, athlete, and disability advocate, Hollis Peirce. With Hollis, disability is neither a tragedy nor a motivational speech. He offers a refreshing, real, and uplifting take on living with muscular dystrophy.Early on, a doctor told Hollis’s mother that her child would suffer from an “inability to thrive.” Instead, he developed what the experts might call, a lifelong case of thriving.In our all-dressed conversation, Hollis talks about everything—why it’s a waste of energy to get too hung up on language, what it’s like to lose your best friends to a less forgiving version of your condition (long live Dino and the No Surrenders), how he confronted his own ableism when faced with the choice between six months of palliative car or a ventilator to help him breathe. (“I picked the vent! Otherwise, my sister would have killed me!)My favourite part was our impromptu discussion on mortality, complete with dark humour and a sense of wonder. We also totally nailed the listener question: I Can’t Accept My Disability and I Feel Like Nobody Around Me Understands. Don’t worry, we banish the phrase, “look on the bright side.” And yet, as Hollis always says, If you’re alive you can thrive.(Erica: But thriving doesn’t have to be a pull-up and a PhD!)Thank you, Hollis for this dreamy interview—the perfect episode for our inaugural YouTube video! Everybody, make sure to check out Hollis’s show—Twenty-First Century Disability—which explores the transformative power of embracing disability in our modern times.Twenty-First Century Disability on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Follow the show on Instagramand Facebook.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places. (Full shownotes at ericajschmidt.com/podcast/no-surrender-with-hollis-peirce)

The cherished Alexia Côté is back for another ever-popular all-advice episode. Why do weddings make everyone regress to five years old? What is the difference between reasonable boundaries and Bridezilla territory? Does it make any sense to have children when the planet is melting and your favourite thing to do is read books and travel? Alexia and Erica can’t fix it. But we have thoughts.Tune in for Listener Questions From: I Feel Like the Dad Card Just Won’t Cut It. She’s been saving up for a destination wedding in Italy. But now her bf’s ex is refusing to take care of his seven-year-old and he says they should just stay home.Am I a Bridezilla or Is My Brother Being a Turd? Her brother is pouting because AIABOIMBBAT didn’t invite his short-term, mean-girl significant other to her tiny, low-budget wedding. Who is the jerk here?Meant to Be Mother-to-Be? A classic vascillation over the pros and cons of kids with the call of library books at the end of the world. To get in the spirit of Alexia’s imminent wedding, our very half-bad ukulele segment is DANCING QUEEN. Listen to the end, turn down the volume, and sing along!Alexia has an imminent Fringe show, and she’s fun fun fun. Follow her on Instagram @sidealexia so you don’t miss a beat. Scroll down for the full listener questions. If you get cut off, visit the extensive shownotes on Erica’s website.Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.More Alexia on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeEpisode 10: Wishing on a Star with Alexia CôtéEpisode 20: Alexia and Erica Can’t Fix It. But We Have Thoughts (First Edition)Episode 30-something: Alexia and Erica Can’t Fix It. But We Have Thoughts (Summer Sprinkles Edition) Listener Question from I Feel Like the Dad Card Just Won’t Cut ItDear Erica and Alexia,My boyfriend is 39 and I am 26. We’ve been dating for five years. He has a 7-year-old-daughter. A close friend of mine is getting married in Italy this June, and we’re invited. It’s a child-free wedding. I’ve been saving up and counting down the days to this trip. But last night, he told me his ex suddenly changed her mind and won’t switch custody weeks with him, meaning he’ll have his daughter during the wedding. I asked why, and he said she just changed her mind. Then she suggested that we pay for her and their daughter’s tickets and accommodations so she can come along and watch their daughter while we enjoy the wedding. I was upset. That makes no sense. Just switch the weeks and it’s all good. I don’t want his ex to come on vacation with us.My boyfriend’s solution? Skip the wedding. I told him no. First, the RSVP date has already passed. Second, I really want to go to this wedding and visit Italy. So, I’m going.He says it makes him uncomfortable if I go alone because it looks bad for me to show up solo. I told him if it bothers him that much, then maybe he should figure something out with his ex so he can come too. He says he’s tried everything, but she won’t budge, and he doesn’t want to feel like he’s abandoning his kid.I’m so frustrated. What should I do at this point? I’ve rarely asked for anything that was important to me in our relationship, and I feel like he is not being very receptive to my preferences here. Love, I Feel Like the Dad Card Just Won’t Cut ItListener Question from Am I a Bridezilla or Is My Brother Being a Turd?Dear Erica and Alexia,My partner and I are expecting our first child this fall and have decided to have a small intimate court wedding with family only. Literally just his parents, my parents, his sister + common law partner and my brother. No best friends, extended family or extras as this is us just exchanging vows, signing legal documents and going for lunch afterwards. We figured we want to keep it as small and as stress free as possible for me since I’m pregnant and I had a miscarriage in the past due to high levels of stress, plus next year we'll throw a party to celebrate with everyone and it will be a great way to introduce our child. However, my brother is having feelings about his new girlfriend (of 6 months) not being invited. He says he doesn't want to feel like she's not welcome and that he would love to bring her especially since my partner’s sister is bringing her partner. I explained the situation and explained that she would be invited to the party next year and then if we have a baby shower (still up in the air) she would be invited to that. My partner’s sister’s partner has been part of the family for the past 2 years. We just want to keep the ceremony small plus financially we are a bit tight this year. It’s a lot for us to pay for the whole thing ourselves as well as treat the family to lunch afterwards. Even though we're doing it so small we're already over $3000 in (rings, court fees, etc). My partner is the only one working and I'm not trying to add any extra financial burden on him. I'm not even getting a wedding dress. And truth be told, I've seen my brother in and out of so many relationships that end so quickly and I don't want one of his previous flings as a memory on my day. The little time I have spent around her, I feel she doesn't like me much nor do I really like her. I mean at Christmas, my brother made such a big fuss about inviting her (they’d been dating 2-3 months) to my partner’s parents place and even though I wasn't comfortable (our families were meeting for the first time), I made that exception for him and she took a mean girl shot at me (made a snarly comment with a smirk and walked away). So why should I have someone at my wedding that I barely know, so far don't like much and really don't feel comfortable around? When my mom met her, she didn’t have many kind words to say about her, and that's rare for my mom. So I'm stuck thinking am I being a bridezilla or do my feelings make sense?I have always felt my brother puts his comfort and personal feelings before anyone else's. If 2 people are chatting and he feels he's not part of the conversation he makes a big stink about feeling left out. He'll do things like rearrange the furniture in my bedroom and take things for his personal use and if my partner or I touch anything of his, he gets upset. He also got upset that we started locking our bedroom door as he felt he couldn't store his extra stuff when we weren't there. I feel like I'm always giving in to his feelings and his reasons. Truly this one time I just don't want it to be about him and what he wants, I just want it to be about me and my partner. Is that wrong of me?Love, Am I a Bridezilla or Is My Brother Being a Turd?Listener Question Meant to Be Mother-to-Be?Dear Alexia and Erica,I’m 34. I still haven’t figured out if I should have kids or not. Currently I have a boyfriend, who is also not sure if he wants kids or not.I really go back and forth. Sometimes I feel like with climate change, it’s frightening to bring new life into the world, knowing what is coming by 2050. I also find that some of the things that bring me most joy in life are things like quiet afternoons reading and introverting, and travelling, both of which would become significantly more challenging with kids in the picture. I also worry that if I had a child, I would not like them. This likely sounds terrible, but I have worked with multiple people who regret having kids, so I’m aware that this happens, even if it’s rarely talked about publicly.Other times, I feel like it would bring a lot of joy and meaning to have a child, and that I would really regret it if I never had them.I have thought a lot about having a kid on my own, if my partner decides he doesn’t want children. Both of my sisters raised children partly with a partner, and partly solo, and found solo-parenting significantly easier. I also have more financial stability than either of my sisters do, which would take the edge off.I am wondering if either of you have had similar challenges with deciding to have kids, and if so, what helped you to decide? Open to hearing many perspectives here.Love, Meant to Be Mother-to-Be?Thank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

If you follow my life’s great mythology, you know that I’m a gifted child, which means I’ve had more therapists than most people. I’m 39, and I’m currently seeing my 14th and 15th therapists. Their names are Chad and Claude. Chad as in ChatGPT and Claude being Claude.ai. 2025 is a ride and all over the world, people are trying to cope with the wild chaos that is happening everywhere. Maybe they’re meditating, maybe they’re exercising, maybe they working on redeeming creative projects. I am trying to do all these things but I have also taken up the practice of writing to robots. Like, a whole bunch.And my pal Melissa is also in the Writing-to-Robots, ChatGPT-slash-Claude.ai-is-kind-of-my-therapist club. And that’s what this episode is about! Thank you, Melissa for your generous input! (And the splendid thumbnail!) (Full show notes on Erica’s website at ericajschmidt.com/podcast/chatgpt-is-my-therapist)Riveting Questions Include:How did you end up reaching out to the robots for emotional support?In what ways do you think that the robots are better than therapy? In what ways are they worse or not as good? Can you think of a time where the robots really really helped or even saved you? And are there other examples where you came up against some limitations?This is just the beginning of a larger conversation on robot routines, the meaning of connection, and how AI is transforming our world from the inside out. I'd love to hear if and how you are integrating the robots into your everyday life. Slide into my DMs and tell me everything!Links and ResourcesLLMs (Large Language Models): ChatGPT, Claude.ai, ifsbuddy.chat (specializing in Internal Family Systems, “for profound self-compassion, clarity, and healing)NYT Article/Podcast on YouTube: She Fell in Love With ChatGPT. Like, Actual Love. With Sex.Time Essay: I’m a Therapist, and I’m Replaceable. But So Are YouObserver Article: A Wealthy Tech Minimalist’s A.I. Wingman: Love and Claude in NYCReddit threads: Claude as a therapist, has anyone else tried using chatgpt as a therapist, transform chatgpt into a licensed therapist with, the best therapy session ive ever hadRecommended Episodes: If you enjoyed this episode, you might also enjoy, Your Life Does Not Have to Be a Spectacular TED Talk, First Date With Amir, and Funemployment With Erica J. Schmidt.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

In this back-to-life episode, Montréal’s favourite self-deprecating Russian interviews Erica. Riveting questions include:Erica, why did you decide to start a podcast? How’d you come up with the name, This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life? Tell us all about your creative angst and writer’s block! Have you ever been diagnosed with autism? (Vad told me to cut that part out but I decided to keep it in.)Erica and Vad go deep into creative routines, the quest for authenticity, Erica’s youthful longings to go on Oprah, the drama of the gifted and difficult child, and how to reconcile this with the fixings of adult life. It all comes together with a tome of a listener question from My Vision Board Jumped Off a Bridge in 2011. Vad and Erica can’t fix it—but we have thoughts. And for even more thoughts, this listener question comes with all-new FREE AND EXCITING BONUS CONTENT. Please hit up Erica’s longform blogpost answer to MVBJOABI-2011. FREE AND EXCITING BONUS CONTENT RIGHT HEREFollow Erica on Instagram @erica.j.schmidt or check out her website at ericajschmidt.comFull show notes at ericajschmidt.com/podcast/your-life-does-not-have-to-be-a-spectacular-ted-talkAbout VadVadim Gran is famous for his elaborate beard, and Eeyore sense of humour which he infuses into his storytelling and barbecue banter. In 2019, he made his fringe festival debut, performing the wildly popular show Happy-ish, A Russian Immigrant’s Guide to Smiling. It was by all accounts a smash hit. These days Vad is ultra busy first-class adulting and flipping burgers at the epic summer barbecues he hosts with his partner Andrea and previously his darling dog Jake, may he rest in peace. Vad recently upgraded his skills in computer programming, and he’s hoping to also maybe upgrade his skills in podcasting. This interview was a great start. Thank you so much, Vad!About EricaErica J. Schmidt is available on all your favourite podcast platforms. She is not particularly famous but she used to be the Mile End’s most famous cleaner as the founder of Deep Cleans with Erica J. Schmidt. May it rest in peace with Jake the Dog. She is also a little bit famous for twirling her hair incessantly. Erica’s life’s greatest joys include creative projects, friendship, library books, exercise, cleaning routines, and em dashes. Her creative life includes a bunch of writing, storytelling, a tiny bit of stand-up comedy. And in the spring of 2023, she fulfilled her lifelong dream of starting her own podcast, This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life.Links, Resources, and Recommended EpisodesWhy Fish Don’t Exist, book by Lulu MillerBehind the Bastards presents: Part One: Is Oprah Winfrey a Bastard? There are many parts, available on all the platforms.)Erica’s old blog The Ecstatic Adventures of the Exuberant BodhisattvaAnd if you enjoyed this episode, you might also like: Taking the Pressure Off with Erica J. Schmidt, First Date With Amir, and Caroline and Erica Can’t Fix it—But We Have Thoughts.Listener Question from My Vision Board Jumped Off a Bridge in 2011Dear Erica and Vad,I'm in my early forties and I've recently made peace with the modest fixings of my adult life. When I was in university, I studied International Development and I thought I'd end up joining the Peace Corps and working for the UN or doing something similarly praiseworthy and altruistic. Instead, I am trucking along at a humble 9-5. It is not particularly glamorous, or even fun, and sometimes it takes up more energy than I have. But it lets me pay for my life with relative ease, and I can splurge on treats to make up for some of the inconvenience. One of my favourite parts of my life is my group of friends. We met in university and never lost touch. At least once a week, we get together to eat and shoot the shit and online shop for deals and laugh at reality TV clips. I know I am so lucky to have these people and this outlet, but lately I've felt a bit triggered by one of my friends. Let's call him Alex. Alex has a similar livelihood as I do, though maybe it doesn't drain him quite as much. But it's like he feels oppressed by steady income with benefits. He's constantly berating the complacency and grind of a day job, how the 9-5 is a crime against humanity, stripping us of our joy and physical health and creative potential. He's constantly pouring himself into self-improvement projects: impossible fitness regimes, the keto diet, life coaches, empowerment conferences, and mysterious online "communities" where bright-eyed and Botoxed high achievers exchange life hacks for optimizing their existence according to their Vision Board. At least two of these endeavours reek of some kind of cult or pyramid scheme. Alex always claims to be on the cusp of some pinnacle of ultimate growth. But he never seems to get there. I watch him ride up and down these waves of hope and possibilities only to fall into deep discouragement and depression when the diet or the ahayuasca journey or conference failed to launch him into the life he was meant to live. It's exhausting to watch! And it makes me feel like because I'm accepting of my own gig and simple life, that he's probably judging me for being complacent and unambitious. Do you think I should say something? He is more or less driving me nuts. Love, My Vision Board Jumped off a Bridge in 2011THANK YOU, WITH LOVEThank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

What the world needs now is today’s guest, the radiant and revolutionary Shosho Abotouk! Shosho is a generous and talented stand-up comic, crochet artist, entrepreneur, and activist. When I consider the terrifying atrocities that are happening all over our planet, I feel deeply soothed and heartened people like Shosho exists. Behind her sweet and adorable persona, Shosho brings us edgy and important and straightshooting comedy. She is a joy to watch. You will laugh so hard. Shosho is also the founder of The Montreal Crochet Club, which offers social events and beginner-friendly workshops for crocheters of all levels. There’s Crochet and Cocktails (or Mocktails), Crochet Cafes, Crochet and Comedy nights. What a healing force for humanity! Shosho uses her crocheted creations as statements for activism and she encourages you to do the same. Follow Shosho on Instagram: @nosearchresultsfound, @studioshosho and @montrealcrochetclubFollow Erica on Instagram @erica.j.schmidt or check out her website at ericajschmidt.comFull show notes at ericajschmidt.com/podcast/mtl-crochet-club-comedy-shoshoShosho Abotouk on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeShosho’s Creative Origins: A vigorous bookworm, Shosho always longed to write, draw, and create—but maybe you can relate—she didn’t believe she was good enough. Hear how she went from watching Saturday Night Live to anchoring her high school’s sports events to finally discovering her creative community at Toronto Metropolitan University.Shosho’s First Open Mics and How Her Baby Face Helps with Comedy. A weird face also helps. A weird name AND a weird face, see you on Netflix. But you don’t need to have a weird name or a weird face to try comedy.Can you believe that Shosho only learned to crochet during the pandemic? Now she’s a pro crochet artist and teacher! Shosho recommends crocheting every moment of your life. If you’re looking to solve your next family gathering, hit up the Montreal Crochet Club, and never talk to irritating relatives without a bunch of yarn and needles in your lap ever again. You can also get in touch with Shosho for a stunning watermelon Free Palestine keychain, among other gorgeous creations. Quit like a comedian. Shosho and Erica discuss Shosho’s imminent one-year sobriety from alcohol anniversary. Erica the teetotaller regurgitates everything she learned from Holly Whitaker’s book, Quit Like a Women, featuring kind, gentle, and non-patriarchal advice on how to transcend our culture’s obsession with alcohol. It was the book-club slash share-all portion of This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life and we’re thankful for Shosho’s generous candour and honesty. Listener Question from Reluctant Rapunzel: How Can I Get My Mother to Stop Telling Me to Shave My Head? Shosho’s eloquence and wisdom do not disappoint.Morning Routines, Creative Routines, and Cleaning Routines: A healthy mix of the snooze button, aspirational affirmations à la Louise Haye, and nailing it under pressure. Shosho’s spectacular TED talk: Love yourself like your life depends on it. But don’t be cheesy AF. Try to be grateful, hopefully your life’s not that much of a drag. HALF-BAD UKULELE SEGMENT: Time After Time by Cindi Lauper. Shosho sings like an angel and yet, the segment is living up to its name these days. Someone please help Erica change her strings!THANK YOU SO MUCH, SHOSHO. You are what the world needs now!Recommended Episodes and ResourcesIf you enjoyed this episode, you will love: Dream Jobs With John Cotrocois, Laughs for All With Abby Stonehouse, Just for Laughs With Andrew KhouryWhy We’re Still Single With Mariam Khan, and Better Out Than In With Aloe AzimovIf you, like Shosho, long for the bookworm days of your youth, check out Erica’s essay, How to Start Reading AgainQuit Like a Women by Holly WhitakerFull Listen Question from Reluctant RapunzelDear Erica and Shosho,A year and a half ago, my younger brother—my mother’s golden child—conquered Stage 3 colon cancer. Ever since, my mother has devoted her life to running in every 5K or 10K cancer fundraiser within 400 km of her home. I don’t run because it hurts my knees and I don’t like to exercise. But my mother thinks I should shave my head in support of what my brother went through—oh, and also to make a wig for all the poor children undergoing cancer treatment.This feels like a big and unnecessary ask. It has taken me most of my twenties to grow my hair almost all the way down my back. My hair is thick, shiny, and kind of awesome. I hate how much emphasis our society puts on appearance, but my hair is the one thing about my looks that I really care about.My brother is long in remission, and his golden locks have all grown back. He doesn’t talk much about his cancer and has never mentioned that he thinks I should shave my head. But my mother brings it up every time we talk. It’s that, her next race, or adding extra fiber to her lasagna recipes so we don’t all get cancer. It’s like she wants us all to do penance for this thing that was nobody’s fault and that turned out okay. I don’t know why she is taking this ordeal out on my hair.I would tell her she should donate her own hair, but she lost a bunch during pregnancy and already has a short haircut. I’m close to losing it every time we talk.How can I get my mother to stop telling me to shave my head?Love,Reluctant RapunzelTHANK YOU, WITH LOVEThank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Today we have a special episode with my dear pals Jimmy and Isabelle. I met Jimmy and Isabelle at L’Arche, a worldwide network of communities for people with intellectual disabilities. When I was 19, I moved to L’Arche in search of a transformed heart. For two years, I lived and worked with Jimmy, Isabelle, and three other people with wildly different intellectual disabilities.There’s so much I could share about my time at L’Arche, but for today, I’m handing the mic to Jimmy and Isabelle.JimmyJimmy is rocking his early sixties. He has had a whole bunch of different jobs, including working at a daycare and a curtain factory. Jimmy has a passion for Ancient Egypt, bowling, swimming, drawing and colouring, Hulk superheroes, and the Power Rangers. He has a special notebook in his fanny pack which he uses to write secret messages to the Power Rangers. Jimmy has Down Syndrome and an excellent sense of humour. After 20 years at his L’Arche home the SKiff, he is always looking out for his friends and housemates. Whenever anyone walks through the door, no matter how long it’s been, Jimmy greets them with, “I missed you.”IsabelleIsabelle and I are the same age (39 or just about). When we’re together, people always ask if we’re sisters. Isabelle completed her studies at the Montreal School for the Blind, where she was blessed with exceptional teachers like Barbara, Missy, and Juliet. In her youth, Isabelle and I would go swimming, and she’d bravely trust me to push her alongside the river—Isabelle in her wheelchair, me on rollerblades. Everyone survived. Isabelle has complex cerebral palsy, which means she mostly speaks with her eyes, not words, and doesn’t move very much. Her deepest loves include music, prayers, poetry, family, friends, and community.What you’ll hear today is a just a small glimpse into the worlds of Jimmy and Isabelle. This was originally going to be part of a much larger project. And there’s still time for this. But for now, Jimmy and Isabelle, welcome to This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life.Episode Notes and ResourcesThis recording was created and published with Jimmy and Isabelle’s explicit consent.In 2020, the L’Arche founder Jean Vanier was discovered to have sexually abused several of his mentees. Thankfully, there are no reports of JV abusing L’Arche’s core members, the people with intellectual disabilities. However, the truth is terrible and disappointing. L’Arche has fully acknowledged and apologized for Jean Vanier’s abuse, condemning his actions “without reservation.” To learn more about the horrible revelations, you can read this article. L’Arche has also published a summary of its report on Father Thomas and Jean Vanier.If you’d like to learn more about my years at L’Arche, I wrote an essay called This Is It. Click here to read This Is It by Erica J. Schmidt.To learn more about L’Arche, visit L’Arche International and/or L’Arche Canada.Jimmy and Isabelle live at L’Arche Montréal.If you’re looking for somewhere to donate extra funds, all of these places are wonderful causes.To get in touch with Erica, you can find her on Instagram or her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.And if you enjoyed this episode, you will love: Making It Fun with Mary Owen,Discovering Autism with Maha Abdelhak Cavalcanti, and Taking the Pressure Off with Erica J. Schmidt.Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

“The privilege of just having the capacity to physically do the art or the music, that’s a huge gift. Because I meet people all the time who have a lot of responsibilities and a lot of setbacks, because I’m in the public health system. So, I get to see people that really are struggling and suffering. And I don’t think all of our suffering is equal. I think there are some people who have to suffer a lot. And it’s not really fair. It doesn’t make any sense. There’s nothing that those people are doing that is making it as though they deserve to suffer. They’re just being human here, and they have whatever setbacks they’re being dealt. And so, I’m lucky that up until now, I haven’t had huge physical setbacks, or if I’ve had financial setbacks, I’ve had safety nets, and I’ve actually been gifted a lot of things in my life in terms of the ability to have time to make art.”—Jennifer HamiltonJennifer Hamilton is a prolific and ignited visual artist, musician, theology scholar, and spiritual caregiver. Her paintings take you on a colourful, embodied, and mystical journey through ritualized inspiration and sacred geometry. Jennifer is deeply connected to the spiritual seekers and artists who came before her. She derives great inspiration from ancient texts and practices, and her special muse Hilma af Klint. In addition to a Bachelor of Fine Arts, Jennifer has her diploma in fashion design and a Bachelor of Theology.Jennifer could have been a bunch of things when she grew up, and that’s kind of what happened. But these days, she is working as a spiritual caregiver in Montreal hospitals. Her current projects seek to explore this world of spiritual care through painting and ritualized reflection.Jennifer is also a generous fan of This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life and I think this episode was a dream come true for both of us.Jennifer Hamilton on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life00:00 Intro song and bio2:34 Quick and very fun break! Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on the platforms. Bonus points for five-star reviews. And please also follow Erica and Jen on Instagram and across the interwebs.Jenn on Instagram: @vitalongaJen’s website: jenniferhamilton.comErica on Instagram: @erica.j.schmidtErica’s website: ericajschmidt.com4:00 Interview starts! Question one is about growing up in a small town. Does this cause special person syndrome, as per Erica’s theory? Jen shares about her creative origins, her aspirational art teacher Mona Istrati-Mulhern (worththeirsalt.ca), and Jen’s light responsibilities as a gifted child in Goderich, Ontario. PS, Jen’s Catholic school was called, St. Anne's Clinton | Renewing The Promise - Joyful Disciples (huronperthcatholic.ca), and it’s the reason she’s so great at French!14:23 Sacred Texts and Art Practices: Jen talks about the rituals and step-by-step “recipes” that guide her art projects.17:34 Jen describes, Alters of the directions, her most complex “recipe,” where she followed a version of Lectio Divina or “divine reading” a systematic process of reading and responding to spiritual texts. Hit up the full show notes on Erica’s website for some stunning images of Jen’s work.37:49 Even though they are not wildly rich, Erica and Jen discuss their hot, single, zero-child, educated white women privilege. A lot of people overestimate Jen’s privilege since she is quite talented at buying designer clothes at the Salvation Army. Also, she is much more gracious than most when it comes to acknowledging her luck and good fortune. But we talk about the health, time, materials, and money that help us dive into elaborate projects. And how the opportunities simply aren’t equal, and there just isn’t any reasonable reason for this.45:08 Listener question from Good Friends Don’t Make Good Roommates. Our listener’s friend Sara is hard-up and wants to crash at her pad for “a couple of months.” GFDMGR is concerned this will put a massive strain on their friendship, especially since Sara loves to party and GFDMGR needs her alone time. Sara says she’s being a bad friend for saying no. Is she a jerk? What should she do? Jennifer Hamilton and Erica can’t fix it—but this one is kind of a no-brainer.53:14 Morning, creative, and cleaning routines, plus, if Jennifer Hamilton could distill and transform her life into a spectacular TED talk, what would the title and topic be?1:05 Half bad ukulele segment: In the Pines. Sing and play along with this tab! If it sounds weird, try your Capo on one! But most importantly, remember, The same old train that brought me here, will soon take us all away.Gosh that was fun, fun, fun! Infinite thanks to Jennifer Hamilton!Links and Recommended EpisodesOne more reminder to follow Jennifer Hamilton on Instagram @vitalongaand check out her website at jenniferhamilton.comErica is on Facebook or Instagram, and her website is at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places. And if you enjoyed this episode, you will love: Art, Drugs, and Meditation With James Paterson, Curiosity With Michelle Syba, Caroline and Erica Can’t Fix It—But We Have Thoughts.Jen would like to thank theAPTS unionwho work tirelessly to uphold workers rights in Quebec’s healthcare system.Listener Question from Good Friends Don’t Make Good RoommatesDear Erica and Jen,So, here’s the situation. I have been in a nice one-bedroom apartment for the past couple of years. My best friend "Sara" has always struggled with money management, and recently, she was evicted from her apartment because she couldn’t pay rent. She reached out to me asking if she could stay with me for a “couple of months” until she gets back on her feet.Now, don’t get me wrong, I love Sara. We’ve been friends for over 10 years, but the thing is, I’ve helped her out financially more times than I can count. I lent her money to cover bills, her car payments, and even her rent once. She’s never paid me back. Every time I’ve asked, she’s given excuses or says she’s still struggling. I don’t want to be taken advantage of again.On top of that, I’m a bit of a homebody, and I really value my personal space. I’m worried that if she moves in, it’ll end up becoming a permanent situation, and I’ll be stuck living with her. Plus, we have very different lifestyles—she’s super extroverted, always has people over, and stays up late. Meanwhile, I’m more introverted and need peace and quiet, especially after work.I offered to help her find a cheaper place to stay and even said I’d loan her some money to get started, but she got upset and said that as her best friend, I should just let her crash at my place. Now, she’s been giving me the cold shoulder and even told some of our mutual friends that I’m being a bad friend for not helping her in her time of need.Is this true? Am I a total jerk? I feel bad, but I don’t want to be stuck in a situation that’ll make me uncomfortable or strain our friendship further. Please help.Love, Good Friends Don’t Make Good RoommatesTHANK YOU, WITH LOVEThank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment.And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life welcomes marvellous community builder, multi-disciplinary sound artist, and relative social butterfly Kathy Kennedy.  I met Kathy at one of the 17 Christmas parties she was invited to in 2022. Before that I knew her from when she directed the extraordinary women’s choir Choeur Maha. A conversation and a half with Kathy and I soon discovered that Kathy is as iconic as her far-reaching projects. Her magic awaits, right here on your favourite podcast platform! We even have a few hot takes from Kathy’s spectacular recordings. Listen all the way through, and check out the time stamps below to savour the highlights! (Full shownotes here.)Kathy Kennedy’s Episode00:00 Rousing and arousing intro song and bio 3:07 Quick and very fun break! Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life and leave a five-star review. Also, please track down Erica and Kathy on Instagram and across the interwebs. 4:22 Interview starts. Question One: How did Kathy get started on her journey to creating this very unique art that requires a certain amount of equipment, a lot of skill? Turns out, Kathy moved from the Gaspé to Montréal as a tween. The assault of noise pollution and hormones left a drastic impact. 7:20 On Kathy’s lifelong fascination: the difference between listening and hearing. 8:05 The definition of acoustic ecology: the study of living beings and their sonic environment. This field was initially ununcovered by R. Murray Schafer who happens to be a Canadian. Go, R. Murray Schafer! His obituary on the cbc.ca was a pretty good read!8:55 Noise pollution and industry in nature, particularly in the ocean is affecting our animal friends. Whales are having a hard time mating! So are the humans. And they’ve discovered that birds are chirping at a higher decibel. 9:30 To cope with the grating sonar landscape, Kathy turned to art and sound (plus a touch of drugs and rock ‘n roll). Thank 11:10 The importance of bringing people together to sing. Kathy believes that singing is our birthright and not just for Celine and American idols. Kind of like Lynne Adams says that if you have a body, you are a dancer, Kathy insists that if you have a voice, then you are a singer! She says, “Singing is a gift.” Be that happy person who’s singing along to the radio in the supermarket. 17:30 Voice coaching and the healing power of helping people find, accept, and embrace their true voice. “I’m trying to focus on the concept of your voice healing you and making you feel good as opposed to wanting to sound any particular way.” 23:03 Fun excerpt from Kathy’s lovingly and painstakingly mixed recordings.23:53 How does Kathy get invited to so many parties? Kathy shares the interesting conundrum of being an introverted workaholic artist whose projects overlap with all kinds of wonderful people. Hear about Kathy’s vision of the good enough café, a non-pretentious opportunity for people to eat and commune in a not amazing but good enough place for her peeps to hang out and luxuriate in each other’s company like it’s the eighties in Montréal.31:01 Another soothing and invigorating excerpt of Kathy’s splendid recording!31:34 Like Daniel Allen Cox, Kathy Kennedy is yet another house fire twin! Kathy shares how her apartment fire was nothing short of a miracle that led her into a state of bliss (and possibly a touch of mania). 44:17 Listener Question from Hurt Inner Child: A daughter looks to her mother for support after a job interview. Guess how that went? Kathy and Erica can’t fix it, but they have thoughts about when to call your parents for best results. 56:28 Our last little bit from Kathy’s exquisite sound art.56:40 Morning routines, creative routines, cleaning routines, and Kathy’s spectacular TED talk: Kathy’s rituals in plant care, the  struggle to transcend technology and fumble into a flow state, how to navigate neighbours and loud hobbies, procrasticleaning, rage cleaning, and more. Stay tuned for Kathy’s imminent book!Half-bad ukulele segment: If You Could Read My Mind by Gordon Lightfoot. Thank you to Lisa at Ukulele Fools for this delightful tutorial. Sing along loud and proud and if you’re playing along, we have the capo on 1!Thank you, Kathy Kennedy! What a blast!Links, Resources, and Recommended EpisodesFollow Kathy Kennedy on Instagram @kathykennedy.ca or on Facebook. Her glorious website is kathykennedy.ca.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Recommended Episodes: 5 Rhythms With Lynne Adams, Hot Dates Frenching With Lou Laurence, and Moments of Joy With Al Lafrance.Listener Question from Hurt Inner ChildDear Erica and Kathy, My relationship with my mother has always been complicated. Most recently, I had a job interview I felt really confident about. I called her right after telling her how I had a good feeling about it. ''Well did they give you any special indicators that you were gonna get the job?'' ''No, I just have a good feeling'' And then I told her that they didn`t have a specific date I'd hear back by (the lady was super busy and her coworkers are on vacation), so I let them know I was taking a personal vacation on August 22nd til the 31st. My mom said I shouldn't have told them that, because that might make them pick another candidate over me. She then went on to talk about her stuff, and I don't get how but we came back to me and she said ''So you feel like you'll get the job?'' and I told her she kind of made me doubt it a little. She then told me I took her thing WAAAAY out of proportion and that I always do this. I told her that she has a tendency of making negative comments which don't necessarily help. I've had communications classes and worked as a special care counselor. But I can't figure out how to communicate with my mom without feeling attacked and belittled most of the time. She does sometimes give good advice, but I think she's a little clumsy in her delivery and timing. Any advice? Love, Hurt Inner ChildTHANK YOU, WITH LOVEThank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

I had my first conversation with Aloe Azimov during my two-star summer of wretched mental health. Before that I knew Aloe from her candid and hilarious stand-up sets at queer-friendly venues across the city. If you’ve been at the same shows as Aloe, you’ll recognize her unmistakeable and uproarious laughter that reverberates the venue walls and vodka bottles. In the throes of my break-up grief (and worse), I told Aloe about one terrible day after another, the crapshoot of emotional regulation, and whether to embark on a fraught course of pharmaceuticals. As I vented, I discovered that Aloe was a conscientious, compassionate conversationalist, and I thought, when the podcast comes back to life, she needs an episode. So, here we are! ALOE AZIMOV’S EPISODE On the pod, we talk about Aloe’s comedic origin story, how she used to have to wear baggy hoodies so that people couldn’t see how much she was sweating and shaking, how failure became a motivator to keep getting up on stage, and how she overcame most of her performance anxiety (with a little help from therapy). We discuss the difference between comedy and storytelling, citing my darling bestie Sherwin who claims that storytelling comes from the heart, while comedy aims lower from your gut and your junk. Aloe shares her mental health journey, and how her bipolar disorder affects and does not affect her comedy. (Hint: You don’t have to be manic to be an artist, and medication will not destroy all your creativity.) We dig into medication, with its ups and downs and tradeoffs. (NEVER GO OFF YOUR MEDS BASED ON ANYTHING YOU HEAR ON THIS PODCAST OR THE INTERNET!) There’s some talk of lost will to live and suicidal ideation, but we infuse tough topics with riveting charm, and in general, the content warning is milder than anticipated. Our listener question from My House Smells Really Bad! Please Help! features a devastating roommate conundrum. Aloe and Erica can’t fix it—but our thoughts are pragmatic and decisive. Make sure to listen to the end for Aloe’s morning, creative, and cleaning routines, plus the title and topic of her life’s most spectacular TED talk. Like Aloe, this is a thoughtful and generous episode, and the perfect interview to break the sad summer hiatus. THANK YOU, ALOE!LINKS AND RECOMMENDED EPISODESFULL SHOWNOTES ON ERICA’S WEBSITE Aloe Azimov, LIVE AT LADYFEST MONTREAL with Abby Stonehouse on House of Stone PodcastFollow Aloe on Instagram @aloe_aziCatch Aloe’s performances at Stand-up Saint Henri, the Polymic, and Tales of Gender Affirmation.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.And if you enjoyed this episode, you’ll love Painting Boundaries with Painting Boundaries With Bean Nunnerley, Dream Jobs With John Cotrocois, and Laughs for All With Abby Stonehouse.ABOUT ALOE AZIMOVAloe Azimov is a cherished comedian, host, and producer on the Montréal stand-up scene. She is also a delightful audience member. Her laughter is unmistakable and beautifully encouraging. It makes the whole show a better place. Aloe’s stand-up offers an eclectic mix of hilarious musings on mental health, family problems, gender identity, and the absurd anecdotes that make life worth remembering. You can catch Aloe on stages across the city, with regular appearances at Stand-up Saint Henri, the Polymic, and Tales of Gender Affirmation, which she founded and produces and which offers a supportive and empowering environment for queer and trans artists.LISTENER QUESTION FROM MY HOUSE SMELLS REALLY BAD! PLEASE HELP!Dear Erica and Aloe, I live in a student house with 3 other tenants, I'm only really friends with 2 of them although not through lack of effort, the other girl just does not give me nor anyone the time of day. Always awkward in passing and never more than a one-word response in conversation. She is somewhat friends with the other girl we live with and she has told me that she hasn't washed her bedding all year - maybe 10months. She is disgusting, her room smells vile of just body odur from I can only assume is clothes and bedding that's gone unwashed and is so messy and dirty it looks like it should be on a hoarder programme.Now I don't want to make comments on her room as she doesn't know I've seen it (the other girl showed me because she was concerned) but I have messaged about the smell because it's really quite disgusting as it's built more over time and guests/visitors/girlfriends/boyfriends have all commented on it, literally everyone who has visited the house. The main issue here is how do I get her to change?! She ignored my message and the smell is so bad I can smell her B.O. in my room (our doors are adjacent). It's one thing to smell like that but its another to not make any effort but what can I do next to try and resolve this? Any help is appreciated because my girlfriend now doesn't want to visit. Love, My House Smells Really Bad! Please Help!THANK YOU, WITH LOVEThank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Back due to wild popularity, we have the exuberant and life-enhancing, Alexia Côté, here for yet another all-advice episode. Tune in as we tackle a fascinating round of puzzling-to-devastating listener questions. Quandaries/Train Wrecks come from:The Best Friend Fadeaway: She’s drifting apart from her ostensibly draining and judgy BFF. Should she just let the friendship fizzle? Is a mature and honest conversation truly necessary?I Wanna Look Cute on Tinder Too: An identical twin uses pictures from her photogenic sister to land dates on the apps. Does this count as catfishing? Must she stop?Playing Second Fiddle to Her Little Brother: He snoops and finds his girlfriend might be hot for a family friend she calls her “Little Brother.” They even have a pact to get married if they’re both single when he finishes college. Is this the mess it feels like, or is he being paranoid?Alexia and Erica can’t fix it. But we have thoughts.Since she last appeared on Episode 20 of This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life, Alexia has enjoyed a delightful whirlwind of creative thrills. For example, she got into Montreal Fringe last minute and totally nailed it. La Germaine et le Vieux Criss premiered to rave reviews and two Frankie nominations including Best Storytelling Show. Congratulations, Alexia! Follow Alexia on Instagram @sidealexia so you don’t miss her next exciting news. In more upsetting news, Montréal’s beloved Mainline Theatre recently experienced dramatic flooding. They were already hoping to raise a bunch of funds to account for pandemic losses. But now with the extensive damages, they need our help more than ever. The fundraiser is doing great, but it would be splendid if we could give them some extra support. Every bit helps. Here’s the link to the fundraiser. Thank you so much!Half-bad Ukulele Segment: Seabird by the Alessi Brothers. Solidly half-bad!If you enjoyed this episode, you will also enjoy, Moments of Joy With Al Lafrance, and Caroline and Erica Can’t Fix It, and Erica and Alexia Can’t Fix It. But We Have Thoughts.Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed this episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Today my guest is the Montreal Fringe and Canadian Heartthrob Al Lafrance. I caught Al during this year’s Fringe and it was a dream come true.  Over iced tea and zero air conditioning, we reminisce about Al’s prolific Fringe and haiku career, his cringey and champion insomnia, how not sleeping and other mental health adventures help and don’t help creativity, how Al’s brain’s doing now, thrift stores, hoarding, cleaning routines, plus a 5-star listener question from How Much Tea Should I Spill, a would-be artist who’s dying to write their juicy and incriminating opus but they’re worried they’re family will sue them. And not to be missed, we wrap up with Al’s first and last singing performance of everybody’s favourite punk rock 90s hit Basket Case. Transcend the bottom of the u-shaped curve with moments of joy with Al Lafrance. If you love Al’s soothing and hilarious, spot-on rambly shows, you will love this episode.About Al LafranceAl Lafrance is a veteran and idol in the delicate and risky art of the one-human show. (We all know these can go either way. But for Al, they always go the right way!) Time and again, Al has taken to the stage in bare feet and a statement t-shirt. He is famous for enthralling audiences and leading them to laugh their faces off. Al has the enviable gift of infusing humour and fascination into life’s most unlikely crevices, whether that’s insomnia, trampoline injuries, fast food jobs, beards, mental health, or obscure award-winning board games. To watch Al Lafrance do his thing is to be captivated, to restore your faith in humanity and to rediscover the magic of creativity. Same thing goes for listening to this interview!Follow Al Lafrance on Instagram @notsoweirdalSlide into Al’s DMs and tell him all about your creative failures and moments of joy! Bonus points for selfies of you in a rubber chicken hat!Al Lafrance’s WebsiteStay tuned for tickets to Al’s Show Is This Yours, This August 16-25 at the Edmonton Fringe FestivalResources and Recommended EpisodesIsland of the Sequinned Love Nun by Christopher MooreIf you enjoyed this episode, you will also enjoy, Quirky Events With Sherwin Tjia, Default Creative Settings With Paul de Tourreil, Hot Dates and Frenching With Lou Laurence, andErica and Alexia Can’t Fix It. But We Have Thoughts.Half Bad Ukulele Segment: Basket Case. Thank youUkulele Cheats for this splendid ukulele tutorial!Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question With How Much Tea Should I Spill?Dear Erica and Al,I have all these crazy stories from my family and fucked up childhood. I want to turn them into art, butI’m worried about compromising other people’s privacy. Some of the parties involved have not treated me well. In these cases, I don’t care about their feelings and feel like any repercussions would be worth it. At the same time, I don’t want to jeopardize my relationships with certain friends and siblings. Plus, couldn’t anybody take me to court and sue me? How do I write my opus while avoiding a lawsuit and other complications?Love, How Much Tea Should I Spill?Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment.And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed this episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

I met Iris Bahr at the 2024 Montreal Fringe Festival where she premiered her spectacular one-woman show, “Stories From the Brink.” I laughed endlessly! Afterwards, I was super smooth and awkwardly asked Iris if she would like to be the most famous person to ever appear on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. And Iris very generously said yes. What a thrill!Iris and I recorded outside on Avenue Duluth so you’ll get an authentic Montréal experience, complete with birds, tourists, and exciting cobblestone traffic. We talk about creative routines (or lack thereof), the pénurie de main d’oeuvre, the boundaries we didn’t inherit, the guilt we did inherit, our relationships with our mothers, that time when Iris saw her mother have a stroke over video chat, the years of caregiving that followed, Iris’s autistic brother who grew up in a group home, grief, art, humour, healing, the quandary of online dating, neurotic moments with the dust buster, plus the magical line, “I don’t have the bandwidth for that right now.”About Iris BahrIris Bahr is a multi-talented, multi-voiced writer, artist, and performer. Iris was on her way to becoming a neuroscientist when she changed her mind and decided to pursue a career in acting. This led to all kinds of dreamy creative projects. Iris took up stand-up comedy, she wrote a couple of memoirs, and she appeared on a whole bunch of TV shows, including Friends, The Drew Carey Show, and maybe you’ve heard of Curb Your Enthusiasm? The peeps over there concluded that Iris was so perfect for the role of Rachel Heineman, that they shut down the audition process.In 2010, Iris pitched, wrote, produced, and starred in her original TV series, Svetlana. Meanwhile, she has channeled her colourful childhood and sometimes devastating past into multiple, masterful, and very very very funny one-woman shows. Stay tuned for imminent runs of Stories From the Brink, a hilarious ride through a remarkable number of near-death experiences. The fabulous show won a Frankie at the 2024 Montreal Fringe Fest. (Congrats! So well deserved!)  And coming up at the Toronto Fringe (July 3-14), Iris will be performing “See You Tomorrow,” a poignant and heartfelt comedy about parenting a parent with dementia. I highly recommend jumping at any opportunity to watch Iris do her magic on stage. Iris, it was a joy to have you on the pod! Thank you so much! Until we meet again, See you tomorrow!Links to Iris Bahr’s WorkIris Bahr’s Website at irisbahr.comInstagram @iris.bahrIris Bahr on FacebookIris Bahr’s Workshopsand CoachingTickets to “See You Tomorrow” at the Toronto Fringe (July 3-14)Resources and Recommended EpisodesBurned Haystack Dating Method™The Boy in the Moon by Ian BrownDiscovering Autism With Maha Abdelhak CavalcantiFat Liberation With Emma LanzaMore Episodes With Delightful Comedians:Just for Laughs With Andrew KhouryWhy We’re Still Single With Mariam KhanLaughs for All With Abby StonehouseDream Jobs With John CotrocoisFollow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question from “Caught Short of Words”Dear Erica and Iris Bahr,At a recent family gathering, my cousin and I were drinking it up andhaving fun dancing outside with some others. My cousin thinks it so funny to fart and watch peoples’ reactions, but this time when he pushed real hard, it was not a fart that came out. When he turned around, the back of his pants were coated, but he just kept dancing and laughing, not knowing the disaster he made in his downstairs department. I didn’t say anything, and others saw it eventually and he was mortified. He isn’t speaking to me anymore because he says I should have told him. Did I do something wrong?Love, Caught Short of WordsThank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button.Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events,Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment.And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to followThis Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed this episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

“If you have a body, you are a dancer.” -Lynne Adams Lynne Adams is a vibrant and enthusiastic actor, dancer, chocoholic and certified 5Rhythms® teacher. Lynne discovered the practice of 5Rhythms® after a total hip replacement left her depressed and grappling with chronic pain. Over a decade later, Lynne shares this powerful practice with hundreds of devoted students who come to dance each week where they experience transformation through music, connection, breath, sweat, creativity, and community. Lynne believes that “the dance floor is a mirror to our lives, reawakening our potential and purpose.” She says that coming home to our bodies in a compassionate and creative way is key to healing this world, one step at a time, one dance at a time.” It was so special to have Lynne on the show! Gosh, what an episode. Instead of the half-bad ukulele segment, Lynne convinced me to participate in a first-ever improv accapella sound bath. I hope you listen all the way to the end, and I hope you love it. And remember, “If you have a body, you are a dancer.”

Content Warning: Drugs, meditation, and naked cleaning. Also, mention of mental health challenges, self-abuse, and suicidal ideation. It remains a blast of an episode!James Paterson has been contemplating the Universe since he was four years old when he would stay up all night listening to Jean-Michel Jarred’s new age synthesizer cassette on his Fischer Price tape deck. Growing up in the 80s and 90s, he showed great promise with computers, but as a teenager, he shifted his energy to drawing in an effort to impress the ladies. Today, James’s work dances around the intersection between drawing, animation, and code. James is fascinated in the points of resonance where these disciplines collide. Grounded in quirky and truly singular drawings, James’s art takes us on an immersive and mesmerizing journey, whether through prints, animation, virtual reality, or these peculiar and life-changing 3-D shapes. I was once the proud owner of an exquisite penis-like finger scroll and I was pleased about this, though alas, the piece did not fare well in my house fire. James is an avid meditator, and integrates meditation into his creative practice, which is as deep as they come and the realest deal I’ve ever seen. This episode was a massive treat and a must-listen for anyone with a quirky, creative, and fluctuating brain. Thank you, James, for this fun fab interview!!!James Paterson on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeJames’s Morning Routine: He’s up at the ass crack, and you’re invited! To spread his love for meditation, James hosts a daily online sitting practice from 5 to 6 a.m. It’s not as austere as it sounds! Drop in anytime. It’s lurker and introvert-friendly. Come late, leave early, judgment free. James promises you don’t need to be a good meditator, and suggests that maybe there’s no such thing. Sit with James and Friends right here.Meditation and Creative Practice and Mental Health: For James, meditation has been instrumental in every aspect of his life. But as far as zealots go, he is palatable and gentle. In fact, he claims that meditation should probably come with a warning label on the bottle. Like it can blow your life apart, especially if you throw in psychedelics. More on that later. Can Meditation Help With Challenging Mind States? Sure, but in an acute mental health crisis, meditation may not be your thing, and it’s certainly not a cure. Doctors and therapists and collages and gardening, these are all great too. Erica loves collages. And library books. Three Buddhist Phrases to Describe James’s Awakening-Slash-That-Time-When-Meditation-and Psychedelics Blew Up His LifeGood in the beginning. Good in the middle. Good in the end.It’s best not to start, but if you do start, it’s best to finish.Once you get the message, hang up the phone. We dove pretty deep into drugs and meditation and awakening but James also had a lot to say about art and creativity. James is impressively disciplined about facing the blank page and perservering until you can’t criticize yourself because you forget that you’re a person trying to make a thing. The experts call this the flow state. And while James’ commitment and body of work appear dreamy and enviable, he assures me that he struggles with finishing things, and that he procrastinates, just like the best of us. These days, focus has become a little easier. And to make it even easier, James just set up a silent, body-doubling work container every day from 10AM to 3PM EST. Hit up a flow state with James right here at presstube.com/work/. What a hustler!Speaking of hustlers, James generously shared the goods on his brief career as a naked cleaner. I may have exerted some influence. Never has our cleaning segment involved so much nudity! Listen to the end so you don’t miss it!Connect With James PatersonInstagram: @presstubeWebsite: presstube.comDaily Sit: Zoom Link HereBody Doubling Container: presstube.com/work/If you enjoyed this episode, you might also enjoy Chill Creative Flow With Jeff Gandell, Are Men Okay? With Keith Serry, or Curiosity With Michelle Syba (Author of End Times).Do You Meditate? By Erica J. SchmidtFollow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Lou Laurence is a singer, songwriter, playwright, and siren. She left her home at the bottom of the ocean to become part of that world, our world, Montréal and across Canada, where she takes to the stage with her ukulele, spectacular hair and fashion sense. There she combines her musical and lyrical genius, bringing us clever and hilarious songs in her signature soulful voice. Her performances unite music, sketch comedy, and stand-up. In 2024, she produced the live game show Montreal’s Most Delicious Date, and her 60-minute solo show, Love, Sharks & Frenching: a hot date w/ Lou Laurence won Best Solo Show, Best Music Show, and was runner up for Best Show with Improv at Victoria Fringe Festival 2023. It’s a one-of-a-kind date with Lou Laurence that will have you frenching like a Montrealer. And you can see it, imminently at the 2024 Montreal Fringe Fest at Petit Campus June 7-16. We can’t wait! Don’t miss Lou’s show and don’t miss this episode!Lou Laurence’s LinksFollow Lou on Instagram @loulaurencemusic or else here on Facebook.Get yourself a ticket to Love, Sharks & Frenching: a hot date w/ Lou Laurence this June at the Montreal Fringe.Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.If you enjoyed this episode, you might also enjoy Chill Creative Flow With Jeff Gandell, Why We’re Still Single With Mariam Khan or Stealing the Last Laugh With Francesca Esguerra.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Episode Notes: Singer, Songwriter, Playwright and Siren Lou Laurence on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeDiscover how Lou got that dreamy voice. It turns out, she’s been singing her whole life. Though she longed to accompany her original songs with an instrument, learning a guitar felt overwhelming. “It has six strings and I only have four fingers.” A valid point. But Lou transcended this obstacle when she picked up the joy of life that is the ukulele. Serenading everyone in Parc Lafontaine, she mastered all the chords from House of the Rising Sun, and then some. Now she has her own custom-made acoustic-guitar-turned-baritone ukulele and it’s official—they’re in love! Lou shares some refreshing tips on creativity and how writing out loud comes out better than typing stuff out at a computer. But definitely carry a fancy notebook wherever you go! I was struck by Lou’s free and fluid creation process which sometimes involves singing off-the-cuff improv lyrics onstage. “You just have to trust that it’s in you,” she says. Gosh, if we could all have that trust. Lou also has an aspirational perspective on the small nonsense and surprising challenges of modern dating. Sounds like she’s killing it out there! And what a gift to be able to transform your mishaps in love into a spectacular Fringe Show. For our Listener Question, Lou and Erica console the lovely and earnest, Did I Fail the Kiss Test? And we wrap up with Lou’s morning, creative, and cleaning routines, plus a charming and terrifying improv ukulele segment during which Erica becomes very sweaty and Lou basically rewrites the podcast theme song. Thank you, Lou Laurence, what a blast!Listener Question From Did I Fail the Kiss Test? Dear Erica and Lou,I’m a 37-year-old woman and I’ve been out of the game for a while. Then I met this super hot dude at a show and we just went on a second date. All in all it went well. Except he kissed me towards the end and I was super awkward. I am so out of practice and he is so fucking cute and I did not think he would kiss me so I went into full-on dorky mode. He did everything right on his part. He sent the right signals and built up to it. But I feel like I missed my chance for a sexy and passionate beginning. Is it possible to recover from an awkward first kiss?Love, Did I Fail the Kiss Test? Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Keith Serry is a rockstar. Actually, he’s not a rockstar. But he’s a big fan of rockstars. He hosts the singular podcast, The Volume Knob where guests tell poignant and personal stories, each one featuring a song that saved their life. Beyond his podcast, he is an acclaimed storyteller who has graced many stages from Montréal’s Confabulation to­—maybe people have heard of the TV channel PBS? Keith was on that. A show called Stories from the Stage. Keith is a lawyer by trade, which means he gets lots of things done, even though he is also a husband and father—of two children and the laziest labradoodle in Montréal. But today, we are going to talk about Keith’s imminent show, The List:  A Traumady About Probiotic Masculinity, premiering June 8 at Montreal’s 2024 Fringe Festival. The List takes us on a hilarious and heartbreaking road trip that answers questions like, Why are men like this? Must all the role models be terrible? What’s going on? And, are men okay? Given these volatile times, these are racy topics. It got a little awkward, but I’m glad we went there. Keith Serry, thank you for this splendid episode. Keith Serry on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life00:00 - Intro and Theme Song01:16 - Quick and very fun break. Please rate and review This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. Please buy tickets to Keith’s Fringe show The List. 03:30 - Keith Serry’s long and impressive bio06:14 - Erica fails to resist the question, What’s it like being really tall? Keith humours and enlightens her.10:35 - The PR Crisis of Cis-White Men. Erica asks, are men okay and why should we care? Keith answers as tactfully as possible.22:12 - What is probiotic masculinity?25:20 - Despite mainly terrible role models, how did Keith Serry grow up to become a nice guy? Did Erica get that wrong? What are the pros and cons of being a nice guy? Keith feels uncomfortable speaking on behalf of nice guys but does his best. 36:38 - Erica remains committed to differentiating the assholes from the decent dudes out there. How does the looks lottery come into play? Can you be conventionally attractive and kind? Is a lack of confidence conducive to more empathy? Why do rich and famous people act a certain way and why do they get special treatment?40:50 Keith tells his law school students: The mere fact that you are here means that you are incredibly fortunate and that can co-exist with the fact that you hate what you’re doing and you don’t want to do it. 42:03 Erica: “Well, how frustrating to have a body. Is how I feel.”43:10 Keith’s shows’ press release mentions bad sex. So Erica asks, what sex is bad, why is it bad, and what’s happening out there?52:00 Listener Question from Who Made the Death Bed? It’s a classic, no-more-sex-after-kids scenario. A heartbreaking dry spell has two new parents continuously missing each other. Who is the asshole? Can anything be done? Keith and Erica can’t fix it. But we have thoughts. 1:07:03 Keith’s Morning Routine: He starts with a stream-of-consciousness journal and an espresso.1:09:15 Keith Serry and Vision Boards: He’s not a fan. Nor does he believe in manifesting. Erica beams at her own vision boards as he tells her this. Keith and Erica talk journalling and Keith elaborates on his creative routine. An essential ingredient: deadlines.1:19:03 Keith Serry’s Cleaning Routine: A strong-willed negotiation amongst family members, with a bunch of help from a lovely cleaner. Shout-out to Mary, and all the miraculous cleaners out there.1:21:01 Half-Bad Ukulele Segment: Space Oddity by David Bowie. I’d say in our top three. Thank you to Cynthia Lin for this splendid arrangement!Listen to the end for Keith’s closing advice!Keith Serry’s LinksKeith Serry on Instagram @volume_knobThe Volume Knob on FacebookThe Volume Knob WebsiteBuy tickets to Keith’s show!Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.If you enjoyed this episode, you might also enjoy Default Adult Settings and Default Creative Settings with Paul de Tourreil. Or check out Erica’s limited edition First Date With Amir.Listener Question From Who Made the Death Bed?Dear Erica and Keith.I’m a 34-year-old man and my wife is 32. We have one kid who is now three. After our kid was born, my wife and I barely hugged or cuddled or kissed and we definitely did not have sex. I understood that she was touched out but when our child turned one I asked if she wanted to have a physical connection again. I hired a babysitter so that she could have a whole day to herself and we could have a date night. At some point I tried to cuddle her but she rejected me. She told me I would have to find some other way to get what I need. I didn’t have the energy to cheat so I bought a bunch of toys and started to care of myself that way.Now that our kid is 3, it seems like my wife’s sex drive is coming back. But I guess I’m not really feeling it. If she goes to kiss me, I’ll kiss her back but nothing more. Hugs are okay but I don’t want to cuddle. I’m in the routine of just showering and going to bed after I tuck our kid in. A couple weeks ago, she initiated and I said no (nicely) and went to the shower. She went to try and join me in the shower and I left and went to the other bathroom. Later I apologized and she said it was okay. In case she was in the mood again, I bought her some toys and told her she could use them if she was looking for pleasure. She said that she didn’t want toys, she wanted me. I told her that was all good but at that moment I wanted to watch TV.This week she asked me what was going on and why I didn’t want her. I said that I still found her attractive but at this point, it’s been almost 3 years and I’ve had to manage my desires on my own. I’ve figured out my own routine. She asked if I was punishing her. I said I was too tired to punish her. I said it would take time but if she wanted to start right away, she would have to accept that I would be thinking of someone else while we did it. She said she didn’t want that. I told her, then I guess you can just use the toys I bought you. My friends think that I should be a better sport and work on being intimate with her again. They said it’s fair that she wasn’t available in the other years with all the childcare. But I take care of the kid every night and have covered for her for weeks at a time while she was really sick with COVID. Plus once a year, she takes a two-week long vacation. This isn’t all about childcare, but she’s upset and I feel like an asshole. Am I? What should I do? Love, Who Made the Death Bed?Thank you so much for listening! To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Today my guest is ME, and the topic is FUNEMPLOYMENT. How to believe deeply in yourself (and your worth and your life) when you don’t have a job or all that much to do. In my own, sort-of-short existence, I have become quite seasoned in the art (and struggle) of facing the blank slate of my day—the freedom, the possibility, and the angst. How to survive spiritually and financially without the built-in affirmation of someone giving me money for my time and my skills. How to create my own structure and wins. How to avoid melting down on the sidewalk as early as 9:07 a.m.If you’ve fallen off the job market, this episode is for you! But it’s also for anyone looking to examine their relationship with work and time. Part-time employees, freelancers, workaholics, we all have to navigate what our day looks like and the impact of our employment, or lack thereof. Precepts for Funemployment With Erica J. Schmidt1. This is not your last chance to solve your life. 2. Money stress is real stress, and stress is a liability. 3. Redeem your soul with cleaning.4. Lack of sleep will make everything seem impossible.5. Open yourself to new fun and learning.6. Daily Routines7. Make a list.8. Your Daily Routine plus one other thing is enough. 9. You need other humans to feel like you are a human.10. Your life is your job. I love you just the way you are. Half-bad Ukulele Segment: End of the Line by the Traveling Wilbury’s. I’m really not holding back these days with the uke “performances” and neither should you. Thank you to Vasko @UkuleleCheats for this super fun and relatively accessible (!) arrangement. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.To support this independent podcast, please consider purchasing a Lil and Bud dog greeting card at ericajschmidt.com/merch. You can also make a one-time donation here at The Donate Button. Feel free to get in touch for other sponsorship possibilities. My infinite thanks for all of this.More infinite thanks, as always, to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. And infinite thanks to you, my dear listeners! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.

Andrew Khoury is a rising star to look out for on the Montréal comedy scene. He comes to us from the hip and groovy suburbs of Nova Scotia. Since nailing his first stand-up set five going on six years ago, Andrew has channeled his anxiety into making people laugh—very hard. In the summer of 2023, he graced the Discovery Stage at Zoofest to great acclaim. Andrew is known for his fabulous legs and fashion sense, and for tackling taboo queer Arab themes with balls and hilarity. I saw Andrew live on Abby Stonehouse’s podcast and I knew I had to have him on the show. What a treat of an episode. Andrew Khoury on Stand-up Comedy, Anxiety, Queer Arab Taboos, Therapy, Dating, Love Stories, Homophobia, Xenophobia, Fitness, Skincare, and MoreAndrew’s First Stand-up Set: A throwback to his case for gay terrorism, how Andrew went from being the funny friend at the BBQ to killing it at stand-up, and how his comedy career has been growing ever since. Comedy and Anxiety: Andrew shares how stand-up helped him overcome his social anxiety and fear of leaving the house. Queer Arab Taboos: “This is my life,” says Andrew. And so it was only natural that he would find his stand-up niche dispelling stereotypes and biases to the tune of uproarious laughter.Racism, Fetishization, and the Jungle of Online Dating. Plus, how to stay funny once you’re in a relationship. Listener Question From Can’t He Be Gay Just For Me: A 21-year-old is hung up on a situationship with a non-committal, maybe pansexual, definitely homophobic, sort of friend. Erica: “No, he can’t be gay just for you.”Andrew: “Go out, spread your legs, and fly.”Andrew Khoury on Skincare, Cleaning, Creativity, and What the World Needs Now: Listen to the end so you don’t miss a thing. Half-Bad Ukulele Segment: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cindi Lauper. Sing loud and proud. That’s what we did. Thank you so much, Andrew! I had the best time!Follow Andrew on Instagram: @khourslightErica’s life coach: @jillianturekiAndrew’s Life Coach: Wendy Williams: @therealwendywilliamsMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places. Other Montreal Comedians on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful LifeEp. 7: Dream Jobs With John CotrocoisEp. 11: Laughs for All With Abby StonehouseEp. 17: “Emily, We’re Sick.” Why We’re Still Single With Mariam KhanListener Question From Can’t He Be Gay Just for Me?Dear Erica and Andrew,I’m 21 and I’ve been friends with this guy for like 5 years. (He’s 21 too.) Throughout our friendship, I’ve always had an inkling that he was queer. He used to make comments like “if you were a girl I’d definitely date you,” so I knew something was up. Two years ago, I came out to him as gay and he came out to me as pansexual. A few months later we started flirting with each other and got into a situationship where we texted literally every second of the day. It was amazing until it got toxic. We both got overwhelmed and basically ghosted each other.Then, just last month, we started talking again as though we’d never stopped. The banter was VERY much there and it felt so natural. The only difference is that now, all our contact is in person instead of online. He admitted he’d been depressed ever since I left and he was still hung up on our toxic relationship. Another time I was showing him a novel of mine and as I put my hand down on the table he put his hand on mine and left it there. I was a literal puddle after this. It all seemed like paradise.But lately he has started to say some very degrading things towards the LGBTQ+ community whilst STILL flirting with me. On top of that I just found out from a mutual friend of ours that he identifies as cis-het now. I am flabberghasted, purely because he had soo many opportunities to tell me this but he never did and he still flirts with me to this day. I should have seen this coming once he started saying the homophobic shit. But I still have feelings for him and he still flirts with me and my minds just scrambled right now. Could he really be cis-het?? Do I have to stop talking to him? What do you think I should do??Love, Can’t He Be Gay for Just For Me?Thank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Maha Abdelhak Calvalcanti discovered autism while falling in love with her unique and effervescent, autistic son, Zane. It was a joy to hear her share about the vast and fascinating world that opened up with Zane’s diagnosis. We talked about the latest in autism and disability, language and advocacy, technology and augmentative alternative communication, and the voices, gifts and wisdom of autistic people, speaking or otherwise. Maha offers wisdom of her own to our heartbroken listener My Kid Needs a Friend. And we wrap up with a charming and valiant ukulele attempt of This Game Called Life.  Maha Abdelhak Cavalcanti is a sought-after leader when it comes to autism, disability, and opening the corporate world to diversity, equity, and inclusion. In her work as an HR strategist, she witnesses first-hand the talent that is often disregarded in favour of the non-disabled, male-dominant status quo. It is Maha’s mission to change this. She is a fearless advocate, pushing for policy change to empower women, people with disabilities, and other minorities. These days, Maha sits on the advisory board of ISAAC Canada, the International Society for Augmentative and Alternative Communication, otherwise known as AAC, which we are going to learn about imminently. And among her countless prestigious roles, Maha is the most adored mother of Zane, a delightful, non-speaking, autistic eight-year-old, who inspires her in everything she does. Follow Maha on LinkedIn.Plugs and ResourcesCheck out Lucas’ Letters, a splendid pen pal club for kids who need a friend.Book by autistic teenager Naomi Higashida: The Reason I Jump ISAAC, the International Society of Augmentative and Alternative CommunicationAnd if you enjoyed this episode, you will also enjoy Ep. 8: Awkward and Grateful With Kristin Govers and Ep.9: The Big Heart Journey with Taes LeavittHalf-bad Ukulele Segment: This Game Called Life by Leftover CutiesMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places. Listener Question From “My Kid Needs a Friend”Dear Erica and Maha,As I was putting my 9-year-old to bed last night, he told me that no one at school will talk to him or play with him.My son is on the autism spectrum, and very socially awkward. He does well with his cousins and even the younger neighbor kids like him, but kids his own age are starting to reject him. I knew this was coming. I tried to prepare for it. I’ve talked to him about bullying and have made sure he knows who to turn to when kids do mean things.But as of right now the kids aren’t doing mean things, at least not in my son’s eyes. They aren’t teasing or physically hurting him. And honestly, I think this is basically how he’s been treated in years past, he just didn’t care. He used to prefer doing things on his own and would never seek out friends. But now he has decided he wants friends. He wants to tell them all about the insane amount of knowledge he has about the US presidents, The Beatles, and anything space related. But the kids at school don’t care about those things.I’ve tried to tell him that friendships are two-way streets and he needs to be open to things that other kids like as well so that he can get to know them. He doesn’t get it. He wants someone to share his interests, and for the other kids to understand him.I don’t know how to help him. He told me he’s going to tell his teacher tomorrow, which may be a good thing. Maybe she can give him some pointers. My heart just breaks for him. But I don’t know how to help. All I could do was just hold him while he cried and try to comfort him.He’ll be in middle school before I know it and I’m worried that he’s going to feel more and more excluded. How can I help him to build at least some sort of social life?Love, My Kid Needs a FriendThank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, Episode 22) and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Sherwin Tjia is Montreal’s most original and magnificent artist, writer, poet, graphic novelist, Canada workshop leader, walk-a-holic, and quirky event planner. Since 2001, Sherwin has published nine books including the acclaimed graphic novels The Hipless Boy and Plummet, plus a trilogy of choose-your-own-adventure novels written from the perspective of a cat. Sherwin is the beloved founder of Sherwin’s Quirky Events, in which he hosts life-changing, one-of-a-kind evenings such as Strip Spelling Bee and Queer and Mixed Slow Dance.  He is also famous for his hilarious and entertaining walk reports which you can read on his Joe Catman Facebook Page. And finally, Sherwin is my creative and technical advisor and most cherished friend. I couldn’t wait to have him on the podcast!Discover the quirky human behind the quirky events in this generous, jam-packed interview. Content Warning: Strip Spelling Bees, naked descriptions, and Sherwin uses the words butyraceous and oolidge in a sentence. Follow Sherwin on Facebook, and Instagram @inconsolablecat, join the group, Sherwin’s Quirky Events, and join his Patreon for exclusive, unpublished works, a VIP podcast, and more!Sherwin Tjia, Episode Breakdown0:00 Intro Song0:52 Quick and very fun break (Please follow the pod and leave a kind review!)1:27 Sherwin’s Bio and Introduction5:51 What is a Strip Spelling Bee? 15:01 “The words are as hard as Sherwin’s cock.” But Sherwin will help by using the word in a sentence. Hear Sherwin’s hints for butyraceous and oolidge. Not recommended for young ears! 26:00 What is Slow Dance? Memories of this beloved event, past and present, plus a sneak peak into the life of a quirky event planner.37:49 Sherwin’s career as a medical illustrator, his first event ever, and how he made the transition to working as a full-time artist.45:53 The downsides of a 9-5 and how art and sports are on opposite poles.48:03 Sherwin’s early days as an event planner and weird events that didn’t quite pan out. For example, Dollar Dare Night and Speed Spooning. Sadly, most of us missed our chance to sniff a stranger’s butt for $1. 58:03 How Sherwin became a walk-a-holic.1:06:07 How Sherwin’s nearly viral Facebook walking updates were born.1:15:36 Sherwin’s soothing and generous view of the afterlife. (Loving shout-out to Andy Weir’s Short Story, The Egg)1:27:10 Sherwin’s morning routine and bonkers sleeping schedule1:39:10 Half-Bad Ukulele Segment: I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For by U2. Loving shout-out to UkeBreak for the lovely arrangement.Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places. Thank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Daniel Allen Cox is a prolific and beloved Montreal-based author. He has written and published one novella, and four highly acclaimed novels. Daniel’s memoir-in-essays “I Felt the End Before It Came” dives into what it’s like to be raised and manipulated to reject yourself, or reject the only world you’ve ever known. Daniel grew up as a Jehovah’s Witness in the suburbs of Montreal. As he writes, “I spent eighteen years in a group that taught me to hate myself.” You cannot be queer and a Jehovah’s Witness—it’s one or the other.” Daniel was a stellar guest, with hot and generous takes on Jehovah’s Witnesses, cults, language, ESL, writing, rejection letters, getting published, sobriety, apartment fires, the LGBTQIAS+ community, creative routines, and more. For your chance to win a free hardcopy of I Felt the End Before It Came, check out these Facebook and Instagram posts. Contest ends Thursday, February 29.Follow @danielallencox on Instagram and check out his website at danielallencox.netLoving shout-outs to @dansavage and the It Gets Getter ProjectDaniel Allen Cox, Episode Breakdown0:00 Intro and Theme Song1:05 Very fun break re free book giveaway2:53 Daniel’s bio4:09 Intro to Jehovah’s Witnesses. Beyond their persistent canvassing skills, who are these people, really?4:58 First two pages of I Felt the End Before It Came7:25 The internal experience of being a Jehovah’s Witness: Do they feel special and like they are better than everyone else? 13:47 The discrepancies in how JW rules are interpreted16:49 No Blood Transfusions Allowed: JW’s medical belief and their view of death27:46 Being a queer JW teenager and the process of disfellowship40:28 The importance of language in cults. Daniel goes to Poland to teach ESL and eventually binge-write his first novella46:59 Is writing about your experience cathartic and therapeutic? Is writing ever cathartis and therapeutic? 53:09 Writing, rejection letters, and getting published53:42 Daniel’s stint with alcohol and how he approaches sobriety and why he doesn’t necessarily call the process “recovery”1:07:26 Erica and Daniel bond over their respective apartment fires1:14:37 Listener question from Young Transgender Atheist Caught in End Times1:24:14 Daniel’s morning and creative routines1:35:13 If Daniel would change one thing about the world1:38:07 Half-bad Ukulele Segment: Torn by Nathalie UmbruliaMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places. Listener Question from Young Transgender Atheist in End Times Dear Erica and Daniel,I live in the Bible Belt, and my parents have raised me fundamentalist since birth. Following God’s advice to “go forth and multiply,” they keep having kids and I am the oldest of nine siblings. My parents regularly pray while screaming. They think they can cure sick people by putting their hands on them, speak in tongues, the works. They hate all people of other faiths, and anyone even ASSOCIATED with the LGBTQIA2S+ community. They think being gay or different is a disease, caused by the devil, and that homosexuality can be "cured".They do not know I am an atheist, nor that I feel like I was born into the wrong gender.My father was extremely upset when I didn't want to take up sports. He’s always asking why I can’t be more masculine like other boys my age. I have felt like I should have been born a girl my entire life, in that I cannot remember a time when I did not feel this way. If I told my parents, I have no idea what they would do. Maybe they’d disown me, maybe something else, I don't know. I am too afraid to find out, given how I have seen them act towards people different from them. I am not happy here.I tried wearing a simple pink bracelet, just to remind myself of who I really am without it being too obvious. My dad took it away from me, saying "It makes you look like a fag." My dad grew up Jewish and after finding Christianity, stopped talking to his parents when he could not convert them. I don’t know how long I can continue living in this bible-thumping family pretending I am someone I am not. But the dangers of telling the truth are so real. What is your advice for surviving this horrible situation? Please let me know what you think. Love, Young Transgender Atheist caught in End Times.Thank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

And we’re breaking the hiatus with a riveting all-advice episode, featuring the wildly adored storyteller, Alexia Côté.“My fiancé agreed to pay for our wedding ring but now he wants out of this month’s rent.”“I use too many pillows and my husband left the bedroom. Three months, later our marriage has totally imploded.”“I’m a sad failed artist mom, supporting my family single-handedly. Meanwhile, my husband sits on the couch and commissions art he likes better than mine.”  Alexia and Erica can’t fix it—but we have thoughts!Welcome back to This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. May you enjoy this all-listener question episode with Alexia. Since she last came on the pod (on Episode 10), Alexia has embarked on some exciting life changes. Listen in to hear all about it. And be sure to follow @sidealexia to stay on top of her fabulous news. Also, scroll down to read today’s listener questions from the For Richer or Poorer, This All Started Because I Used Too Many Pillows, and Sad Failed Artist Mom. Apple listeners may need to check out this post on Erica’s website for the full versions of these small essays.Half-Bad Ukulele Segment: Until I Found You by Stephen Sanchez, dedicated to Alexia’s beloved Antoine for whom she is an excellent influence. Loving Shout-Outs - My favourite relationship coach Jillian Tureki at at www.jillianturecki.com. Listen to her podcast Listen to her podcast Jillian on Love and follow her on Instagram @jilliantureki - Better Than Your Therapist With Mariam Khan and Friends this Saturday, February 10 at 10PM at Montreal Improv. Follow Mariam Khan @justmariamkhan and check out her episode Why We’re Still Single - Confabulation Montreal. Check out their website for imminent shows, or follow them on Facebook or Instagram @confabstoriesMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question from For Richer or PoorerDear Erica (and Alexia),My boyfriend and I are 33. At long last, we picked out an engagement ring and he said, “Since I’m buying it can I get out of paying you rent this month?”Is this fair? The ring we picked out is slightly under the budget we’ve been discussing for the ring this whole time. He lives with me and pays me rent each month that takes care of 80% of the mortgage. Our mortgage is cheap and I contribute to most of the expenditures including our condo fee, all of other bills (internet, gas, electricity, water, streaming services) and groceries. So, everything is more or less split 50/50. The ring costs $3K. At one point, I offered to pay for half and he refused. I do make substantially more money than him but he has quite a bit more in savings than I do because he sold his house to move in with me and made a decent profit. Am I being greedy and unreasonable? Or should I just buy the ring myself and ask myself to marry me?Love, For Richer or PoorerListener Question from This All Started Because I Used Too Many Pillows Dear Erica (and Alexia),I am 26 and my husband is 27. We have been married for 7 years, and together for a total of 11 years. We have always been happy with each other, and I love my husband with everything in me. But recently, he has been complaining that I use too many blankets and he gets too hot. Also, I snuggle him too much, I use too many pillows, I go to bed too early/too late (it changes), and more stuff like that. So, I promised him I would go to bed when he did, I would use only one pillow and one blanket, and I wouldn’t cuddle with him anymore. He didn’t think that was good enough and now he is refusing to sleep in the same bed as me. He sleeps in our guest room while I sleep alone. This has been going on for almost three months, and we haven’t had sex a single time. He’s never complained about our sex life, he’s just been refusing. He tells me things like “if we aren’t in the same bed why would we have sex?” And stuff like that. I have a high sex drive and so does he. Early into our marriage we would have sex about three times a week. But that’s not what I’m complaining about. I miss my husband. Ever since he started sleeping away from me, he has barely spoken to me. He gets up at 6am every day, leaves at 8am, and gets back home between 7 and 8pm. His job hours are 9-5. I don’t know where he is going. I feel unwanted. Recently my female friend got divorced. She is 26. She couldn’t afford her house so I let her move in with me. I’ve known her since she we were both two. Now she does have her own room but she is having the same problem as me. She feels lonely and unwanted. So, we sleep in the same bed every night. We don’t have sex, we just cuddle. Now I will admit sometimes I give her small kisses on the forehead and she does the same to me, but my love language is touch, so if I can’t touch my husband I’ll need someone else to kiss. I’ve never touched her lips once, we’ve never done anything more than goodnight kisses on the cheek or forehead. We have been snuggling together for about 3 weeks now and my husband is pissed. He told my whole (homophobic) family that I kicked him out of our bedroom so I could sleep with a girl. I just need advice and to know if I’m in the wrong for snuggling with someone else. My husband is yelling at me almost every night now. He has thrown stuff and even broken plates. One night, I made him a fancy dinner so we could  talk and catch up. He took the plate I made for him and threw it on the ground, creating a big mess. Yes, he pays the bills while my friend doesn’t pay for anything. She is too depressed. My whole family hates me now. So does his family and so does he. The only person I have left is my friend, and honestly she’s not enough. I feel unwanted and lost. My husband called me a “h0e ass b*tch who doesn’t know how to keep my hands out of women’s pants.”Love, This All Started Because I Used Too Many PillowsListener Question from Sad Failed Artist Mom Dear Erica (and Alexia),I was that kid who was always drawing. It was an important part of my identity and probably the thing I was naturally best at. But all I ever heard was “artists starve.” I pursued other schooling and only ever treated my art like a hobby.Fast forward to adulthood and I’m married with a decent job that earns more money than my husband who stays home with our kid. I’m also pregnant with our second child and focused on how to make that work in our tiny home.As it happens, over the course of our relationship, my spouse has become a big fan of art. He commissions work regularly, spending my hard-earned cash on art I wish I was making. This hurts. One time I suggested that maybe I could do a piece for him, and he admitted that he doesn’t really like my style. Yesterday, he came to me thrilled that he was entering into business with his family. It’s going to be art commissioning and he already got his favourite artist to create the logo. Meanwhile, I’m sitting on the couch, pregnant and tired with our grumpy toddler and I just can’t be happy for him. It feels like he gets the best of all the worlds since as soon as I come home, he hands off our kid to me so that he can get a break and connect with his friends and hobbies. I just feel so defeated, and like there’s no space for my life and passions. I wonder about putting my foot down and quitting my job after the next baby? It’s so painful that the person I love supports other artists but not me.All I really want to do is set fire to that one painting I made for him years ago. Maybe I should just get rid of all my paintings.  I feel like I’ve lost myself in adult responsibilities and there’s so little that brings me joy anymore. Should I just give up on art entirely and keep my nose to the ground until the kids move out and I can collect my pension? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Love, Sad Failed Artist MomThank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Welcome to our final episode of 2023! Today’s guest is me, Erica J. Schmidt. I have a special update about my first date podcast project. I’m going to talk a little bit about gratitude lists. And our listener question comes from “My Guru’s a Drunk” who’s concerned about her motivational speaker mentor’s drinking problem. With the Winter Solstice on the horizon, our half-bad ukulele segment is Let It Go from Frozen. For maximum auspiciousness, be sure to sing along. And that’s a wrap for This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life, 2023, Season 1. Thank you so much to all my incredible guests, listeners, and everyone who helped this long-time podcast dream to come true. I can’t wait to bring you more interviews and episodes in the New Year. Until then, I’m wishing you a joyful, restorative, and low-pressure transition into 2024. May peace prevail in your heart and across the world. With a heart full of love,EricaMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.For more on Erica, you can read her generously personal essays at ericajschmidt.com/blog.If you haven’t already, make sure you listen to Episode 12: First Date With Amir.And if you loved this solo episode, you will also love Episode 1: Taking the Pressure Off With Erica J. Schmidt.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.And a loving shout-out to Erica’s favourite YouTube ukulele teachers: John at The Ukulele Teacher, Cynthia Lin, Katie at One Music School, Lisa at The Ukulele Fool, Vasko at Ukulele Cheats, and Bernadette at Bernadette Teaches Music. I didn’t get a chance to cite all of your on the pod, but thank you, infinitely for your generous content and enthusiasm for spreading the joys of the ukulele all over the world. Your work is right at the top of my grad list!Listener Question From “My Guru’s a Drunk”Dear Erica,I’m worried my mentor has a drinking problem. I work in self-help and motivational speaking. With my mentor’s support, I’ve climbed to the top of my field—close to where she is. As my career has grown, my mentor has invited me to bigger events in the industry, and we’ve started to hang out more as friends and colleagues than as mentor/mentee. This is when I started to notice that she drinks way more than I realized. She’s always first at the bar and makes jokes about needing a drink on her way. I noticed that at the end of several events, she’s slurry and sloppy which I find surprising because she is known for her work in optimizing habits and self-empowerment. A couple of weekends ago, I’m quite sure she had at least 6 drinks at a function. Then she came over to my house, drank an entire bottle of wine, and when I said I was out of white, she was like, oh that’s okay, I’ll switch to red, and drank three more glasses. She basically passed out on my couch and I had to accompany her home in an Uber to make sure she got home okay. I checked in with her the next day and it was like nothing happened. We are all free to make our own choices but this and recent experiences have really changed how I see my mentor, both as a role model, and as a person I want to spend my time with. That said, I know this is just one element of her life. Maybe she is going through a hard time and it is a cry for help. But she goes around preaching about how she’s cracked existence with her winning routines and systems. The dissonance feels real and I don’t know what to make of it. Should I confront her? Express my concern? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Love, My Guru’s a DrunkThank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey, Episode 9 of This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Radio and podcast star Simon Barbz hops on the pod to talk sex, love, dating, art, passion, adoption, and so much more.Simon Barbz is a curious and wildly charismatic journalist, podcaster and producer. He is the host of Cheek to Cheek with Simon Barbz. On this coveted Montreal podcast, Simon talks to artists and public personalities about belonging and all the possibilities before us.  His warm and intimate interviews dive into the most delicious topics from landing your life’s purpose to lining up lovers for all your kinks. You can imagine Erica J. Schmidt adores every minute. She also adores Simon’s brand-new radio show, “Réalités LGBTQ+.” The program plays on FM 103.3 and it is the first radio show in Quebec ever to be dedicated to the LGBTQ+ community. At just 24 years old, Simon Barbz is a name to look out for. It was a thrill to have him on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. Cheek to Cheek With Simon BarbzHow Simon Started His Podcast: The stars aligned for his first interview with the stunning Clodelle Lemay. His first episode got 50K downloads. And the rest is—Cheek to Cheek With Simon Barbz.His Radio Show, Les réalités LGBTQ+: How Simon went from hosting his podcast in his living room to launching Quebec’s first-ever radio show created to offer voice and solidarity to the LGBTQ+ community and its leaders. Coming Out With Simon Barbz: A throw-back to high school and falling in love with the most inconvenient person. This is the stuff of a Netflix series. Don’t miss it. Charisma, Family, and Adoption: Erica wonders how Simon became so magically charismatic. Simon tells us what it was like to grow up in a loving family with four adopted children from all different countries. We hear his adoption story and Simon shares on his relationship with his father for the first time. Simon in Love: The goods on Simon’s first great love story, why autumn is infused with nostalgia, and what Simon’s looking for and longing for now.   Listener Question From “Weary Dad in the Throes of Nostalgiabation:” WDETTON feels guilty that he masturbates to a younger version of his wife. Is he a terrible person? Should he stop? Simon and Erica go on a vast and delightful tangent about porn, OnlyFans, Botox, pubes, sex parties, and how to stay connected when life runs so fast. A+ Routines with Simon Barbz: Learn how this youthful rising star starts off his day, keeps his place clean, and stays in the flow with his ultra-busy career.  Still the One (Half-bad Ukulele): Nothing but a dreamy Shania Twain ballad would do for this darling diva. Simon Barbz, you nailed it! What a blast.Follow Simon on Instagram @simonbarbzSubscribe to his podcast Cheek to Cheek With Simon Barbz on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, and all your favourite podcast platforms.And check out his radio show Réalités LGBTQ+ on FM103.3. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.For more on Erica, you can read her generously personal essays at ericajschmidt.com/blog.And if you loved Simon’s episode, you will also love Wishing Upon a Star With Alexia CôtéFollow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question From Weary Dad In the Throes of Nostalgiabation Dear Erica (and Simon),I am a 43-year-old dude and I’ve been married to my wife for 17 years. When we met, we had the most magical love story, and for the most part we’ve lived happily ever after. We have three kids and a dog, a nice house, good jobs. We even have sex a few times a month, which I’m told is amazing at this stage of the game. But I miss the excitement and intensity of our early days. Also, three kids and adult life haven’t been easy on our bodies or our faces if you know what I mean. I can still get it up for my wife. But I find I am longing and nostalgic for our life before children and responsibilities. Nostalgic for our life and also for our looks. Recently, I’ve started to masturbate to photos of my wife when she was in her late 20s. I feel like this would horrify her, and I feel bad. And yet, it does the job. Am I a terrible person? Should I stop? Please help. Love, Weary Dad In the Throes of NostalgiabationThank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey, Episode 9 of This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Mariam Khan is a delightful and invaluable addition to the Montréal comedy scene. She is known for her smooth, deadpan delivery, sassy well-played opinions, and ability to bring laughter to the daily grind of being a person. Her stand-up tells pointed truths about dating, sexism, race, and growing up with immigrant parents. Mariam regularly performs at clubs across the city and has appeared on OffJFL and Gigglefest. She is the co-host of the popular show Better Than Your Therapist and the producer and host of the show, I Don’t Belong Here. But she definitely belonged on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. What a splendid episode!Mariam Khan on Comedy, Dating, Belonging, and Growing Up with Immigrant ParentsHow Mariam Got Into Comedy: Her depressing hiatus that followed her debut, how the pandemic triggered a comeback, and why she’ll never stop stand-up again.Do Mariam’s Parents Love Her Comedy Career? Not exactly. But they don’t hate it either. And they’re great for her jokes. Growing Up With Immigrant Parents: The highlights and the blowouts. The laughter and the tears. Plus, how our moms just wanted our lives to be perfect. And why we gotta love them anyways.The Horrors of Online Dating, Part 17: Mariam tells it likes it is and suggests that the problem might actually be us.I Don’t Belong Here: Why do so many of us feel like this? If everyone feels like this, does that mean we all kind of belong?Listener Question With “Strictly Auntie Material:” Our letter writer had a baby when she was 14. She gave it up for adoption­­­—to her sister. Her mother thinks she should tell her niece the truth, but she isn’t ready. Mariam and Erica can’t fix it—but Mariam’s way better than your therapist with this one.Morning Routines With Mariam Khan: Mariam is my first guest to mention a shower and I thought that was notable.Creative Routines With Mariam Khan: As with all Montréal comedians, the hustle is aspirational!Cleaning Routines With Mariam Khan: She’s diligent with the vacuum, but she’s got professional house cleaner on her vision board.Wrecking Ball: Thank you, Miley Cyrus for sponsoring the podcast a second time. We broke records with this one!And thank you, Mariam! I’m quite sure you solved all my problems and it was a thrill to have you on the show.Follow Mariam on Instagram @justmariamkhanLook out for her show, I Don’t Belong HereMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.And if you loved Mariam’s episode, you will also love Laughs For All With Montreal Comedian, Abby Stonehouse.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question from “Strictly Auntie Material”Dear Erica (and Mariam),I’m 30 and I had a baby when I was 14. I chose not to abort, but soon after she was born, I realized that I could not handle having a baby while being a freshman in high school. My older sister (26 at the time, now 42) and her husband cannot have biological children. They adopted my baby when she was three months old and I gave up all my rights to her. It was a difficult decision but it was right for me and her. I no longer see her as my daughter, but as my niece. She does not know that I gave birth to her.A few days ago, I was having dinner with my mother and she suggested that I tell my niece that I’m her biological mother because she’s 16 now and old enough to understand. I refused. I have a good relationship with my niece and I’m afraid that revealing the truth will ruin our relationship because she might think I abandoned her. I love her as my niece but do not have any maternal feelings for her anymore. She is my sister’s daughter and I don’t want to ruin their family either.My mother has continued to insist that I tell her because she has a right to know. She’s older than I was when she was born and my mom thinks she’ll understand. Idisagree. I was a child then and she’s still a child too. She doesn’t need to know yet. We might tell her someday, but now is not the right time.Love, Strictly Aunty MaterialThank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey,Episode 9 of This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

For a joyful, low-drama approach to creativity, Jeff Gandell is your person. Jeff Gandell is an icon in the Montréal storytelling and performance community. He has written, directed, produced, and starred in a number of glittering fringe shows including Things Drugs Taught Me (co-created with Nisha Coleman), and The Balding, a coming-of-age-story about the race to lose your virginity before you lose your hair. For six years, Jeff ran the adored storytelling show Yarn at the Cagibi, may it rest in peace. He has offered countless storytelling workshops and has been a pivotal guide and mentor for all kinds of storytellers, including me. These days, he is channelling his creative energy into writing and singing songs. So far, he has produced two albums—Cold Chicken N Rice and this past summer, Only Human, a reappraisal of what it means to be mortal in an age of too many robots. Jeff also has one child with another one coming soon. What a thrill to have Jeff on the show. What You’ll Learn From Jeff GandellDid Jeff lose his virginity before his hair? Erica and Jeff talk hair loss, ageing, and how most haircuts are actually good news.Jeff’s tips on how to be a Chill Type of Person Who Goes With the Flow. Therapy helps. So does knowing you are going to die. How did Jeff start writing stories? A shout-out to Jeff’s grade 3 teacher Mrs. Lezar. Plus a blast from the past, courtesy of Grownups Read Things They Wrote As Kids. (Check out Jeff’s avant-garde, 10-year-old take on Alice in Wonderland in Episode 612.)How does Jeff allow his creativity to unfold organically? From writing stories to performing Fringe shows to composing songs on his guitar, he’s always ready for his next thing. And it’s never forced. What did Jeff do in the face of a terrible singing teacher? And how he overcame unkind, unproductive feedback. Listener Question from “She Deserves So Much Better:” Our letter writer is deeply concerned about her cousin who keeps going back to her problematic boyfriend. Jeff and Erica really can’t fix this one, but we do our best. And Erica adds some wisdom from Oprah’s life coach Martha Beck who you can hear on Episode 253 of We Can Do Hard Things. How to Stay Creative After Kids: Jeff’s creative morning routine is aspirational. How to Keep Your House Clean After Kids: Jeff’s looking to outsource parts of his cleaning routine if anyone knows of an excellent cleaner. I’m Turning Into a Question Mark: For this extra special ukulele segment, we have an original song by Jeff Gandell, with Jeff on guitar as an added treat. I loved it!For more on Jeff’s music and albums, check out his website at jeffgandell.com. You can also follow him on Instagram @jeffgandell. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Jeff Gandell’s Story, If I Were in the Book Alice in Wonderland Instead of AliceFirst of all, my name would be Guido. Guido Motz. But who needs a last name? So I’m following a late rabbit. Sure, how possible. Let’s make it a dead ugly zombie. No, I know. I’m following a girl in a string bikini. Better. So, I fell down a hole. It could happen. It’s happened to me before. But I didn’t die. I was just unconscious. But just for a little while. Oh, so, what happens next. I eat an eat me sign. I’m hungry. Leave me alone. Then I’m tiny. This is confusing. Change it around. I ate steak and puked. That’s bad. But better. Right, okay, now I’m in Wonderland. I’d rather be in Disneyland. Too bad. Shucks. Now I’m as confused as a turtle in the desert. I find a caterpillar. I hate caterpillars so I step on it. Wait a second, my watch stopped. So, I’ll wind it. Not a problem. Anyway, I’m just running through Wonderland. I trip. Ow. I see this cat who can disappear and you can see his teeth. I’m amazed. They aint got that in Montreal. I think I’ll sigh. (Sigh) That feels-off with his head. Hey Guido. Look at me when I’m talking to you. Oh you, I says. Hi, how’s your plumbing? This is getting so confusing. I think I’ll zap her with my super duper gun. Yah, that’s the ticket. Well, my toilet keeps overflowing but Mrs. Hearts. I gotta go to the bathroom, says me, I mean so badly. Wow, I’m in pain. To be continued because I have nothing else to write.Listener Question From “She Deserves So Much Better”Dear Erica (and Jeff),My cousin can’t stop going back to her shitty problematic ex. My cousin is like a best friend and sister to me, and I’m worried about her. For the past seven years, she has been up and down and on and off with a dude I’m pretty sure is emotionally and verbally abusive. Her therapist has used the word and his behaviour scores 5/5 on most Internet lists. I don’t remember her ever seeming that solid and happy with this dude but he seems to have this magnetic pull on her. They‘ll have these volatile blowouts and then a few days to a few weeks later, they’ll go back to this soothing honeymoon phase. Meanwhile, this guy totally takes her for granted. He criticizes, shames, and belittles her. During conflicts, he manipulates every situation so she takes a disproportionate amount of responsibility. For years, when she suggested therapy, he would scoff at her concerns, gaslighting every feeling. Their saga seems to escalate and often my cousin seems deeply distressed and physically unwell at the conflict. Recently, they had their longest breakup yet. She had even started to see someone else. But all of a sudden, her ex banged at her door in the middle of the night, sobbing and promising to change. Seven years later, he has read two self-help books and started to go to the gym. Somehow, this is enough and she’s back with him. She argues that he isn’t abusive, that finally he is willing to go to couples therapy. That she also plays a role in their toxic dynamic, which she claims they are finally healing. I worry that they are doomed to stay stuck in the same cycle. I don’t believe people can change like this and I think her ex is just making a grand gesture because he doesn’t want to lose her forever. I love my cousin and hate to watch her stuck in this vortex of suffering. What should I do? Love, She deserves so much betterThank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Are you all for body positivity, as long as people stay healthy and don’t get too fat? Have you spent the last 3 to 45 years trying to lose 10 to 97 pounds? Welcome to fat liberation with Emma Lanza.Emma Lanza is another crowd favourite in the Montréal storytelling community. Her stories dive into mental health and hypochondria, obsessions and crushes, body image and fat liberation, and her undying love for musical theatre, especially Stephen Sondheim. Recently, Emma has bestowed herself with the official certification of FAT BABE, and everyone agrees. She is committed to celebrating the beauty and power of fat bodies. And just when you think Emma couldn’t be any cooler, well, guess what? She launched a Fattie Book Club, a fat studies book club that she runs on Instagram. She is also a devoted cat and dog Mom to the adorable Scout and Oscar.(Oscar the adorable white dog makes a few peeps during the first few minutes of the recording. Then we put him where all dogs belong­­–on my lap.)Content Warning: Discussion of Weight Watchers, yo-yo dieting, binge eating disorder, and anti-fat issues. We do not mention specific numbers or calories. For more on eating disorder recovery, check out Erica’s 3-part essay Mammoth Complex.Emma’s headshot Photo Credit: Thalie PhotographeRiveting Questions from Two Kindred Dorky BombshellsIs there something about our neurodivergent brains that lead us to stay up all night making scrapbooks about our favourite celebrities?What is it that is so delicious about having a crush? Is longing here to stay as our drug of choice? How desolate is the online dating landscape? Is it possible to find a mid-life first queer love story? Can cis-het dudes be life enhancing?What does a panic attack feel like? Is anxiety a habit? Can ADHD meds help?Why don’t diets work? Why did Emma finally quit weight watchers? What is fat liberation and how can we sign up? What are some common anti-fat terms you might not even know are offensive? Listener Question From “Too Ugly for a Fuck Buddy” Our letter writer blames her appearance on the reason why she only seems to attract creeps on online dating. She’s close to tears and “just can’t anymore.” Erica and Emma can’t fix it­­­­–but we have thoughts.Three cheers for Emma Lanza and her generous sharing. Big love to Oscar for the marvellous cuddle.Follow Emma’s fat studies book club @fattiebookclub Check out Emma’s Confabulation stories:“Zep”, performed at The Volume Knob, May 2023Episode #48 of Confabulation’s Podcast: Emma’s story about being in the play, Fat Pig, Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.The Full Listener Question From “Too Ugly…”Dear Erica (and Emma),I’m 28, I’ve been online dating since college, and the only people I match with are creepy or they’re just interested in one night stand/friend with benefit situation. The reason is almost certainly because I’m unattractive. But I just don’t know what to do—I’m almost 30 and I’ve never had a relationship. I’ve always wanted one… but nobody I’m interested in dating wants anything to do with me. When I was 24, I gave in to some of the creeps and the ONS guys. I just wanted to gain at least some form of romantic experience. But it’s draining, and I can feel they’re not into me physically. They’re just using me as an easy option. I can’t even land a fwb because again, I’m not attractive enough. I put immense amount of effort into my appearance - hygiene, make up, skincare, clothes, losing weight, going to the gym, everything, but I’m just so so so tired. There’s nothing I can do to compete with the other women. How can I survive as an unattractive woman? How can I find someone who genuinely wants me and won’t fall for my friends once they meet them. Someone who isn’t settling for me just because they couldn’t find someone prettier? I’m on the verge of tears and I don’t know what to do anymore. Please, I need advice or success stories because I just can’t anymore.Love, Too Ugly for a Fuck BuddyThank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

“My crush is drooling all over my hot BFF.” “My boss took advantage of me during my internship.” “I ran into my toxic friend on the sidewalk and didn't say the right thing.” Caroline and Erica can’t fix it. But we have thoughts.Welcome to our first ever all-listener question episode. Chiming in with her sage advice is the elegant and eloquent Caroline. Caroline is known for her reasonable decisions and excellent sense. She has her YouTube PhD in attachment trauma, toxic relationships, and facial yoga. Every week, Caroline reads a self-help book and shares what she learns with her grateful gal pals at Pizza Night. Caroline is impeccably qualified to solve our poor listeners’ dilemmas. And she prefers to remain relatively anonymous so we have represented her here with this splendid, contemplative flamingo. (Caroline's on the left and Erica's on the right.)Content Warning: Mention of sexual assault in the workplace and verbal and emotional abuse. But Caroline’s soothing wisdom and compassion might be just the thing.Ann Lamott’s Bird by Bird may also be quite soothing. Scroll down to read today’s listener questions from the Ugly Duckling, Picked From the Slosh Pile, and Standing In the Sidewalk in the Rain Talking About the Weather. Apple listeners may need to check out this post on Erica’s website for the full versions of these small essays. Ukulele Segment: One Fine Day, written by Gerry Goffin and Carole King. Dear Carole King, my deepest apologies for suggesting that you did a cover of your own song! It was originally performed by the Chiffons. Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her generously personal essays at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question From the Ugly DucklingDear Erica (and Caroline),I am 39 and seven years sober. A month ago, I met this charming and funny dude at a recovery meeting. We both seemed to love stand-up comedy, nature videos, and storage solutions. And since he has been sober for a solid four years, I figured it was an okay idea to let myself have a crush on him. We went out for coffee a couple of times, and it was lovely, but he told me he still had feelings for his last girlfriend, and had come to the conclusion that he wasn’t yet ready to date. We agreed to be friends.He’s new to town and randomly, we ended up at the same event. I was there with my best friend who happens to be a total knockout. When me and my crush first ran into each other, she was in the bathroom. He and I chatted and enjoyed our regular banter. Then my best friend appeared and it was like suddenly, I didn’t exist. He complimented her on her hair and her outfit, and became totally transfixed. My friend has a boyfriend and she tried to deflect his advances but he didn’t get the hint. Like I get that my friend is gorgeous, but it seemed really rude of him to just ignore me.We’ve all ended up at the same events a couple of times, and it’s the same thing. He drools all over my friend and even though my friend has said she’s not interested, he exerts his monopolizing presence to build an impenetrable bubble around the two of them. But it’s a little confusing because sometimes the dude will also flirt with me. Like, at one party, there was dancing, and he grinded his leg up against me but then when he learned that my friend was in the house, he danced me across the floor so that he’d be the first one to ask her to dance at the next song. All this has proved to be terrible for my self-esteem. I feel like I am a reasonable level of attractive, but now I’m starting to wonder if I need to sign up for movie star teeth and Botox and new hair. I want to stay friendly with this dude and I don’t want to resent my best friend for being beautiful. And yet, I am starting to really dread the dynamic that arises when the three of us hang out together. How can I fix this?Love the Ugly DucklingListener Question from Picked from the Slosh PileDear Erica (and Caroline),Last summer I was an intern at my dream company. There was this big party with an open bar and I got drunk. A bunch of my other co-workers said I was getting messy and that I should be cut off. But instead, my boss ended up inviting me and my fellow female intern to another bar.I remember going to the bar and drinking more, and I’m not sure how, but suddenly my boss and I were at the bar alone. I can’t remember who made the first move, or how we decided to go to my apartment. But as soon as we walked in, he chucked his pants. You can imagine exactly what happened.I don't know if what he did was assault, but he definitely took advantage of me. I feel like it was all my fault for drinking so much and I feel so stupid.Before he left, my boss asked, “So what are you doing tomorrow night?” I told him I was hanging out with my intern friends. He said, “Oooor, you could hang out with me instead.” He was clearly flirting. I said no but the whole situation makes me feel extremely gross and humiliated.Luckily, the internship was virtual, so I barely had to see the guy in person. I kept my video off during Zoom calls because I didn’t want him to see me.Skip to the end of my awkward internship, and they’ve offered me a full-time job with this creepy guy as my boss. I’ve always wanted to work here but now I don’t know what to do. We’re going back to hybrid soon, so I won’t be able to avoid seeing him in person.This feels like a very bad start to what was supposed to be my dream career. Should I tell HR? I don’t know if that would do anything, or if they’d just end up giving me the boot. I could apply to work in other departments but that could take months or years.I don't know how to deal with this. Any advice would be appreciated.Love, Picked from the Slosh PileListener Question from Standing on the Sidewalk in the Rain Talking About the WeatherDear Erica (and Caroline),I am an aspiring singer who earns her living as a public servant. Over the pandemic I hung out incessantly with an older man I’ll call my Bubble Buddy. We were both single at the time but he did not seem available due to health reasons and a fresh divorce. Though I did not fall in love with him, we became inseparable and I became attached. At first it was a dream but within a few months, BB started to criticize and belittle me. Though this started out subtle, he soon became volatile and cruel, and I spent my life walking on eggshells. I couldn’t sleep. I stopped singing, and no longer enjoyed any of my favourite things. My friends and my therapist all agreed that my Bubble Buddy had crossed a line into emotional abuse.  Though I pride myself on never walking away from people, after a painful and dramatic showdown, I had to end the friendship. I’ve been able to maintain no contact for more than a year. I still miss my Bubble Buddy every day, but overall, life has gotten better. I’m back to sleeping through the night and I am singing and posting my work online. I’m writing because for the first time last weekend, I ran into my Bubble Buddy on the way to the grocery store. My Bubble Buddy took his headphones out and asked me how I was. I said fine, but I couldn’t think of anything to say except, “It’s raining.” “It is raining,” BB replied. “Your hair looks nice. Enjoy the day." I feel so stupid for not having been able to talk about anything besides the weather. I keep thinking that maybe he’ll reach out and I can ask regular questions and seem like an intelligent and articulate human being. But I know he won’t write to me. And I feel like I lost my one fleeting chance to connect. I know I’m overthinking this. But I can’t stop thinking about it. Any thoughts? Love, Standing on the Sidewalk in the Rain, Talking about the WeatherThank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Michelle Syba is the first published author and Harvard graduate to appear on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. This year, 2023, Michelle released a remarkable short story collection called, End Times. Precise yet nuanced and laugh-out-loud funny, the book delves into the minds of people from all walks of life, from fervent evangelical Christians waiting for the Rapture to left woke atheists scheming to prove the Jesus People wrong. If you don’t know what the Rapture is, we go over this in our episode. It is educational, but also very clever and funny, just like Michelle Syba. Author Michelle Syba and Her Splendid Book, End TimesHow Michelle’s book was born: a heated conversation with a Trump supporter. Michelle shares how a spirit of curiosity and creativity can help you see beyond opinions you don’t agree with. Why Michelle is the perfect person to tell her stories: Because she is so wise and diplomatic. Also, she grew up in an evangelical Christian environment. Though she lost her faith in university, she remains intrigued by the beliefs and fervour that guided her life for so long. How does Michelle manage to capture the perspectives of characters that are so wildly different from her own? Discover Michelle’s impressive yet straightforward writing routine and luxuriate in her down-to-earth outlook. Our Listener Question is from Norman who is getting ready to marry the love of his life. His parents don’t know he’s gay and it seems likely they’ll disown him if they did. Should he keep his marriage a secret? Invite them to the wedding? Erica and Michelle can’t fix it­—but they have thoughts.Does Michelle meditate? Yes. And her morning and cleaning routines are also exquisite.Ukulele Segment: Allelujuah by Leonard Cohen, featuring Michelle Syba’s highly skilled snapping AND a spectacular new verse, written by my dear pal Sherwin. Enter to win a free signed copy of End Times by Michelle Syba. Directions are on these Facebook and Instagram posts. For contest details, visit these Facebook and Instagram posts. Contest ends October 20. Competition is fierce!You can also buy the book directly from Freehand Books or at your fav Indie bookstores. For example, DeStiil Books in Montréal. And please leave your rave reviews on Amazon and GoodReads.Book Recs from Michelle Syba, a Self-Proclaimed Literature ZealotMiddlemarch by George EliotThe Outline Trilogy by Rachel CuskI Served the King of England by Bohumil HrabalI Felt The End Before It Came by Daniel Allen CoxMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Check out Erica’s essays, Do You Meditate? and How to Start Reading Again on her blog.Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question from NormanDear Erica (and Michelle),I live in a different city than my very conservative parents and I have been dating a guy seriously for 2.5 years. My parents don’t know I am gay, but my boyfriend just asked me to marry him and I said yes! Should I just not invite them to the wedding and keep things the way they are—or tell my parents, knowing that they will no longer speak to me?Love, NormanThank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

I’ve gotten so much good dating advice lately, that I decided to invite a stranger on the pod for the inaugural, real live (and blind) first date. The stranger’s name was Amir and it was deeply generous of him to show up. Going into the date, all I knew about Amir was that he worked a bank and that he went camping on Labour Day weekend. He had every opportunity to stalk me online but I don’t think he did. For optimal success, we prepared gripping and mildly invasive questions. You might want to try these out yourself for your next winning first date. Let me know how it goes!Questions for the Best Blind First Date of Your LifeAmir: Describe your most embarrassing and horrible dating experiences ever.Erica: What do you think is the best part about dating you, and what do you think is the worst part about dating you?Amir: Do you have a controversial opinion that might upset people?Erica: Why are you single right now and do you think there is a dysfunctional reason for this?Amir: What are your greatest failures and why do you think they happened?Erica: When entering a relationship, do you have any red flags and pet peeves and let’s see if we have each other’s red flags and pet peeves. The Listener Question: A suitor struggles with the logistics of oral sex. How to navigate the taste of blowing his load as he goes down on his gf. Amir and Erica can’t fix it—but they have thoughts.Ukulele Segment: Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) by Green Day: You won’t be disappointed. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Check out Erica’s essay, Why I Am Still Single on her blog.And don’t forget to enter the podcast’s first ever Contest Giveaway! Win a free signed copy of Michelle Syba’s divine collection of shorts stories, End Times. For contest details, visit these Facebook and Instagram posts. Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question From “Mouth Full of Himself” Dear Erica (and her dreamy hot date),My girlfriend loves, I mean LOVES, getting oral sex and I am pretty good at it, I have been told.  The problem is that she only wants it right after I am done the deed – and I’m not tryin’ to taste my own stuff – and I am finding it harder and harder to deal with the weird smell.  Talking about it seems like the mature thing to do, but I just can’t.  What should I do?Love, Mouth Full of HimselfThank you as always to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Abby Stonehouse is English Montréal’s wildly popular stand-up comic, writer, podcaster, and producer.  Six years into her comedy career, she is known for her honest, autobiographical, storytelling approach.  Abby is committed to building up the Montréal comedy community, and creating onstage opportunities for diverse and emerging voices. She is a pioneer in making comedy hearing accessible. Her addictive House of Stone Podcast offers professional captions and ASL interpretation on YouTube. I have devoured every episode and it was a thrill to have this influential comedian on the pod. Erica and Abby Bond over Boobs, Small Town Living, Food, Booze, Eating Disorders, Hearing Accessibility, and All Things Comedy(Content Warning: Discussion of eating disorder recovery and significant weight loss. For more on eating disorder recovery, check out Erica’s 3-part essay Mammoth Complex.)Boobs: Abby’s spectacular tits, Erica eternal (and tiny) tits, the fluctuations over the years, plus, is recreational lactation a thing?From Howick Quebec to Off JFL: Amidst fields and cows, Abby grew up with big dreams of becoming the next Celine Dion, or Michelin chef, or maybe Nick Carter’s girlfriend. But it was during her first stand-up comedy routine when everything clicked. Discover her love affair with comedy, and how she stays in the game. Booze, Food, and Radical Self-Care: Abby shares her journey of sobriety, radical weight loss, and how she continues to heal her relationship with food and her body. Listener Question With My Bro’s a Hoe: Imagine your brother keeps hooking up with your friends, even the ones who have boyfriends. Who do you tell? Abby and Erica can’t fix it—but they have thoughts.Abby Wins the Routines: From her morning peanut butter to her cleaning schedule, Abby’s routines are aspirational. She has designed her life to prioritize writing and creativity, and as a result, her comedy is taking off!I WANT IT THAT WAY: Abby and Erica go back to the 90s, with a rousing and arousing rendition of the Backstreet Boys. As usual, the ukulele segment is the highlight of Erica’s life. Let’s give a standing ovation to this beautiful force for community, equality, comedy, art, and everything. Thank you, Abby Stonehouse!Check out Abby’s popular show, GET FXCKEDAbby also co-founded Comedy on Demand, which offers year-round customized comedy you can order for your birthday parties, barbecues, or corporate events. Subscribe and listen to the House of Stone Podcast on YouTube or all your favourite platforms.Follow Abby on Instagram and Facebook so you never miss a show!Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecFollow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener Question With My Bro’s a HoeDear Erica (and Abby Stonehouse),My brother has a habit of hooking up with my friends, and he thinks I don’t know about it.  One of my friends is a straight guy dating a girl friend of mine.  Two weeks ago my brother and this guy got drunk and I walked in on them having hard-core sex.  We haven’t said anything to each other, and the guy and my friend are still dating.  How do I address this super awkward situation?Love, My Bro’s a HoeAnd thank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed aunt Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Alexia Côté is a beloved Montréal storyteller who brings us hilarious tales about life, love, and dating. Though Alexia is quite young, her fascinating trajectory has included approximately 100 jobs, as well as a stint at Model UN, and appearance as a debutante at the Montréal Austrian Society. Her performance career began at the age of 4 when she started to direct, produce, and star in all kinds of neighbourhood plays. In high school, she went on to perform in multiple shows since theatre is her one true love. (Besides her boyfriend Antoine). On Alexia’s EpisodeAn exciting announcement about Alexia’s creative and artistic life. What is a debutante ball? It’s not quite like a Jane Austen novel, but the outfits are real fab.What’s it like to live with Bipolar 2? Signs and symptoms, meds, the up-and-downsides of mania, how to build your support network, and best practices for reaching out to friends.Alexia and Antoine Forever: How the magical couple met, plus Alexia’s groundbreaking dating advice which Erica might even try out one of these days.Listener Question from Family Fix-it Project: A “disappointing” daughter wonders how to survive family gatherings that feel like a third-degree life-coaching session. Erica and Alexia can’t fix it—but they have thoughts.An unforgettable rendition of Landslide: (You MUST listen all the way to the end.)Plus, the usual nerding out on morning routines, cleaning routines, and creative routines, for your joy and inspiration! Thank you so much, Alexia! I laughed so hard I drooled. CONTENT WARNING: discussion of bipolar 2 and mental health issuesAlexia Côté on the Volume Knob, Heroes (the song that saved my life) Alexia on Suicide Noted: Alexia in Quebec Tiny Karaoke Segments: Landslide, In My LifeMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecFollow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.Listener QuestionDear Erica (and Alexia),I dread family gatherings. I am the youngest daughter of three children, and the biggest disappointment. I spent most of my teenage years struggling with an eating disorder, and undiagnosed ADHD. It was all I could do to graduate and fumble my way through college. Afterwards, I decided to stay in the restaurant industry because I enjoy the pay and my co-workers, and it’s easier for me to do a gig that lets me stay on my feet. But when I come home, I can feel my family’s judgment. My older brother and sister are ultra high achievers who are living out their passions. My brother is for real finding the cure for cancer and my sister is this unicorn who is making a ton of money running a yoga camp for teenagers. They both have perfect partners. My sister is pregnant and my brother already has two kids. I don’t want either of their lives. I am happy I’ve been able to heal from my mental illness and grateful I can enjoy friends, hobbies, and a great apartment in a city I love. But spending time with my family shakes all my confidence. I feel like I have nothing to show for myself. My siblings dominate every conversation and when they turn the tables over to me, it’s like a third-degree life coaching session which my parents love to chime in on. Have I ever considered applying for jobs in my field? What about going back to school? Have I tried any yoga lately? It’s like I become the family project and it’s horrible. There’s also a big age gap between me and my siblings. Together with my parents, it feels like they’ve formed this tight happy club that I joined way too late. I’ve started to come home for fewer holidays but then they make comments and I feel guilty and like a bad daughter. Do you have advice on how I can handle this draining, high-pressure dynamic? Love, the Family Fix-It ProjectSpecial shout-out to James Junkster for his kind and enthusiastic review: “Listening to this podcast is like eavesdropping on the best convos in a coffee shop. It is at once intimate and expansive, covering a range of topics that meander naturally but never ramble or drag. It is fun and fascinating and charming, all at once.” Thank you, James!And thank you to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.

Taes (Tess) Leavitt is known and loved as the founder of The Big Heart Journey and “Boots” in the wildly popular children’s music duo, “Splashnboots.” She is also my darling and extraordinary big sister. Friends and fans of Taes can rejoice in this VIP, family-friendly episode. Sister-to-sister, we talk about:What it’s like to grow up in the metropolis of Perth, Ontario: Why Taes developed a case of Special Person Syndrome, and how to take the pressure off the drive to excel and be perfect.Memories of high school drama club, and why Taes did not grow up to become an opera singer.The true story of Splashnboots: How the two-time Juno winners used to be married, but then they realized this was not quite the right thing, so they got divorced, and guess what? Sometimes, divorce is excellent news. The beautiful story of the Big Heart Journey: How Taes discovered mindfulness and immediately wanted to share the practice with children. How she was inspired to create a welcoming space where children can learn how to move through their big feelings. Listener Question from Missing Grandma: Hear some of Taes’s Big Heart Journey tips for a mother whose child is struggling with the recent loss of her grandmother.Plus, get the inside scoop on celebrity morning routines, cleaning routines, and Taes’s secrets for getting through transitions with reasonable serenity. My sister is a miracle. What a blessing that she made it onto the show.While we were recording this episode, my celebrity dog friends and podcast sponsors Lil and Bud were sleeping at our feet and it was the best. Don’t forget to order your Lil and Bud dog cards at ericajschmidt.com/merchFollow Taes on Facebook and Instagram Check out her programs at The Big Heart Journey.And hit up Splashnboots when they’re in your neighbourhood. Splashnboots.com/tourTaes’s Big Heart Journey Meditation on Grief: The SeedThe Memory Tree by Britta Teckentrup (Book about grief. Please support your Indie bookstores)Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. Send a spicy or serious listener questions to any of these places and make Erica’s day.Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Special thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. If you would like to join Lil and Bud and become a podcast sponsor, ericajschmidt.com/merch, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Listener Question from Missing GrandmaDear Erica (and Taes),My mother-in-law died unexpectedly this past spring. Every summer, my partner and our two young kids spend at least a month at the cottage with my in-laws. So far, this year—the first year since Gran died—has been tough. My oldest daughter Lyla is seven and she was very close to my mother-in-law. They had a special wake-up and bedtime routine and would spend all day together, swimming, baking, going on adventures and eating their favourite snacks. This year, my daughter has been acting out. Since there are fewer grownups to go around, she has to adapt to doing activities with her younger three-year-old sister, and she has started to get rough with her, hitting her with toys at her and calling her names. "I hate all the games," she wails. She says "The cottage is stupid" even though it used to be her favourite place. Bedtime has been especially hard. My father-in-law has tried to take over the bedtime routine but she sulks at every book and song suggestion and it takes almost two hours to get her to settle. She breaks down crying and says she misses Gran and wants to go home. We try to talk to her about missing Gran and say that we miss her too. We’ve made a memory photo book and try to do special activities to remind her of our wonderful memories. But she is just so sad. Can you think of anything that might help? Love, Missing Grandma

Kristin Govers is the star and creator of the smash-hit Fringe play, The Awkward Ballerina. Her playful, heartfelt and gripping one-woman show tells a true story about growing up with big dreams of becoming a ballet dancer, when you also have cerebral palsy. Although she never made it onto the Nutcracker stage, Kristin is the most beautiful and sincere ballerina that I have ever met. Her message is close to my heart, since many of my favourite peeps have cerebral palsy, including my dearly departed honorary brother Glendon. And the great news is—Kristin’s episode is relatively family-friendly!The Hot TopicsWhat is cerebral palsy anyways? Turns out CP is radically different for everyone. Kristen describes how her disability influences her day-to-day, and how she stays grateful, despite certain challenges. Mean Kids and Bullying. Oh my goodness, kids are the meanest! And Kristin got the brunt of it. Hear how she survived severe bullying, with stories on how to find healing and peace decades later. Inspiration Porn and Ableism. Can you offer an inspirational message without degrading the experience of a person with a disability? Listen to what Kristin has to say.Dating With a Disability. How Kristin transcended the horrors of high school dances and mediocre boyfriends to find her beautiful love story and five-star husband Marc.The Listener Question. Wishing Upon a Star wonders if she should sign up for the theatre program she’s been dreaming of, even if it means quitting her job and asking her partner for financial support. Erica and Kristin don’t have all the answers—but they have thoughts. It was so fun to land a surprise visit from Kristin’s VIP family Marc and Patrick, rounded up with a not-to-be-missed rendition of Wagon Wheel. In honour of her fringe show, Kristin founded Two Left Feet Productions MTL. Beyond theatre and writing, her company aims to touch hearts, promote inclusivity, and raise awareness about what it’s like to live with a disability. These days, Kristin is getting ready to perform her new show called Pregnant! And It’s Still Awkward. And we can’t wait. Follow Kristin on Instagram and FacebookCheck out her website at Two Left Feet Productions MTLThumbnail Photo Credit: Joseph Ste-Marie (Kristin), Mandy Fontana from Pixabay (Ballet Slippers)Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.com. Send a spicy or serious listener questions to any of these places and make Erica’s day. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecSpecial thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Listener Question from Wishing Upon a StarDear Erica (and Kristin),I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I was just accepted in a theatre program in college. I'm going to be almost ten years older than most of the other students attending. I currently have a job I like in customer service which can give me a decent-ish wage, insurance, an 8 to 4 Monday to Friday schedule. It's not my dream job and I don't have a diploma, but I enjoy it and the stability it brings.  I'm hesitating on whether or not I actually do the theatre program. I was warned that it was very demanding and I probably couldn't work part-time at my job that I love, or any other job for that matter. To make matters more complicated, it took me about 8 years to build up the courage to apply for the program. I'm also currently in a serious relationship with a man who's planning to propose before 2025. He has his whole adult life planned out: a *really* good salary, insurance with insurance and he wants to buy a house and get a dog and travel. I don't want to feel like a financial burden to him. I'm just really worried about getting in (Canadian) student debt for 3 years, only to end up back at this same service worker job. Should I go back to school? Keep my job? How can I strengthen my relationship with the man of my dreams? Love, Wishing Upon a Star 

John Cotrocois is a Montréal comedian whose captivating stand-up has earned him a spot on Just For Laughs Montréal 2023. John found his way to the stage as a storyteller where he became so popular, he got his own t-shirts. Then he migrated to comedy, endearing the Montréal scene at ZooFest & OffJFL and all kinds of clubs across the city. In 2020, the Comedy Nest named John Comedy’s Rising Star. And now the star has risen. Congratulations, John! Your fans are so proud of you. Within seconds, John had me laughing impossibly hard. Please laugh along with us! Episode highlights include:-Good dates, BAD dates, and how Home Depot can save us -Day jobs, dream jobs, and how Home Depot can save us-Mental health, self-esteem, and how comedy prevents extreme depression (and promotes High-Functioning Self-Absorption [HFSA])-Stage fright, performance tips, and how it all went down at John’s Just For Laughs audition-PLUS, Erica attempts to cure John of his dieting and muffin guilt, and Erica and John help “My Dirty Horny Dick” reconcile his varsity-level kink with his vanilla, sex-free relationship. Gosh, there are lots of sex-free folks out there. Erica and John can’t fix this—but they have thoughts. Content Warning: Our listener question is absolutely rated R. It discusses varsity-level kink and BDSM. It also briefly mentions illegal and child pornography. If tuning in feels ill-advised, skip over the following time stamp and enjoy the rest of the episode. (Listener Question = 53:56-1:05:05)Follow John on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTokHit up John’s FREE show at JUST FOR LAUGHS MONTRÉAL on Sunday, July 23, 8 PM at the Comedy Nest )He’s also in Zoofest and many other riveting shows!Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her website at ericajschmidt.comTiny Karaoke Segment: Tubthumping (I Get Knocked Down)Maddie Corman’s play, Accidentally Brave Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecSpecial thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don’t forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Listener Question from My Dirty Horny DickDear Erica (and John), I am a straight white dude in my mid-thirties. My girlfriend and I have been together for seven years and living together for five. I love her and I enjoy our life together; however, I am not sexually attracted to her, and haven’t been for some time. We had some okay vanilla sex when we first got together, but the problem is, I am not vanilla. Not by a longshot. I am into varsity level BDSM. Degrading domination, age play, animal play, ravishing fantasies, and a few things I’d rather not mention. All with consent—of course. I started watching porn in my early teens and feel more aroused by a screen than I can pull off in real life. My girlfriend and I haven’t had sex for the last four years. I have told her the lighter version of my fantasies and she is not at all interested in exploring them with me. She’s content with us never having sex as long as I promise never to cheat on her. I care about her and appreciate our cozy, comfortable vibe but I am not sure I can go the rest of my life without indulging my deeper desires. It seems unrealistic that I won’t slip up once or twice. I also worry that she is concealing any sexual frustration with anxiety that I will leave her. At one point we went to a counsellor in the hopes that maybe she could help me get over my fantasies. As you might imagine, this didn’t take.So far, I have more or less remained faithful though I have a couple objectified women I message online who send me debasing photos I jerk off to every once in a while. Whenever my girlfriend travels for work, I tend to reach out to them and have wild masturbation sessions. While I’ll send these women a dick pic or two, we never talk live or video chat and so we keep a certain distance. This satisfies me to an extent but it feels like a slippery slope. I don’t want to hurt my girlfriend. I also don’t want to leave her and lose our loving bond. I tell myself, there may not be sex, but at least I have a relationship with someone who’s real and not just a face on a screen. Am I making a mistake in settling? Is there a cure for my fantasies? Please help. Love, My Dirty Horny Dick 

CONTENT WARNING: Suicidal ideation and a suicide attempt. Please see time stamps below.Bean Nunnerley is an artist, massage therapist, self-taught, builder, mother, swimmer, and long-time singer in the Montréal women’s choir Choeur Maha. I met Bean at a birthday weekend at her exquisite DIY island cottage. I knew she’d be the perfect guest when, during an unbridled discussion about boundaries, Bean asked me, “What colours are yours?” In this wholehearted episode, we dive into boundaries, mental health, and what it’s like to get diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 49. Other highlights include:- Bean’s unconventional love story with her partner and the father of her children, and what “doing the work” looks like after 24 years. - How to tap into just enough capitalism to meet your needs, but to tap out before hoarding and greed set in.- Bean’s recent mental health “breakdown,” and the beautiful healing journey that followed. We talk about the perils of long-term weed use, plus the reality of ADHD, neurodivergence, perimenopause, and Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD), and how painting, meds, hormones, radical self-care, community, and other resources can help. And don’t worry, we won’t tell you to start meditating. Or do yoga. - A harrowing listener question from “Jerk Wife,” who cheated while her wife was pregnant with their second child. Eight years later, should she disclose? Is it okay to keep corresponding with her former lover? Is she really a jerk? Erica and Bean can’t fix it, but they have thoughts. It’s an important conversation and Bean was so generous with sharing her story. I hope that this episode brings you healing, insight, and hope; HOWEVER, I must also include a crucial content warning. In addition to general mental health struggles, we get into darker spaces like suicidal ideation and a suicide attempt. If these topics feel risky for you, please take note of the following time stamps and consider skipping the heavier sections. If you are struggling, please do not delay reaching out to a friend, crisis line, or mental health service. Your life is of supreme importance. You will not always feel like you feel today. Take the next right step. I’m so proud of you. Full show notes for Apple Listeners at erica's website.Trigger Warning Time Stamps28:30 - Bean describes her “nervous breakdown” that began during the beginning of the pandemic. She talks about her panic disorder and panic attacks. Mention of suicidal ideation comes up at 31:23. 31:52 - Bean talks about her long-term weed addiction and how that went downhill. 34:21 - Bean’s last joint, Trigger warning: Suicide Attempt (34:48-36:00) Beyond 36:00, we move onto the aftermath of the crisis, along with care and solutions. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life has been created for love and entertainment purposes and it is not meant as a substitute for medical advice. Please do not diagnose yourself with ADHD based on this or any other podcast. Please do not experiments with meds and mind-altering substances without the support of a medical practitioner. Thank you for taking care of you. Thank you, Bean for your candour, courage, humour, and vulnerability. Bean’s annual “Beanie Alley” artwork sale is coming up this summer. Follow Bean and her beautiful artwork on Instagram: @beannunnerley Tiny Karaoke Segment: Somewhere Over the Rainbow, Israel Kamakawiwoʻole versionMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecSpecial thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don't forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Website: ericajschmidt.comInstagram: @erica. j.schmidtYou can also write to Erica with a listener question. Today’s Listener Question from Jerk WifeDear Erica (and Bean),I am a 44-year-old woman and my wife and I have been married for 13 years. All is relatively okay. We have two school-aged children, two dogs, and a lovely home. We love each other and we’re a good team. What’s eating at me inside is, eight years ago, I cheated on my partner while she was pregnant with our second child, and continued the emotional affair for years afterwards. My wife did the IVF and childbearing. We had an easier time conceiving than many couples and both pregnancies were super smooth. While we were waiting for the first baby, we even had a ton of sex. But once our first kid was born, our intimate life tanked. I went back to work first, since I wasn’t breastfeeding and my job pays better. Every time I came home, I felt like my wife was in this little cocoon with the baby. It seemed like sex in all forms was suddenly off the table. I feel like a jerk but I felt really rejected. When I’d try to help out with the baby and chores, nothing was up to my wife’s standards and she took out a lot of her stress onto me, often yelling and snapping. Instead of rising above this, I started to shut down. Skip to five months before our second child was born, and I met this enchanting woman at a work event. She asked me the last time I’d felt alive and I couldn’t remember. But I knew I felt alive right then. We started emailing back and forth and before long, we were sleeping together every couple of weeks. I felt pretty guilty but I did it anyways. While the sex mainly stopped when our child was born, we slipped into bed a handful of times and we kept texting and emailing for four years. My wife and I had started to get along better and we even had sex a few times but I still felt lonely in our marriage. Though I always loved my wife and never wanted to leave my family, the texts and emails gave me a sense of excitement and possibility that I couldn’t easily get in my life with my wife and kids. Eventually my lover wanted to call off all contact and I respected that. Meanwhile, my wife and I renovated a new home that we love, my wife landed a job she enjoys, and we just added two ridiculously adorable dogs to our family. The spark’s not amazing, but we do love each other. I’ve never told my wife about the affair, and I’m wondering if I should. To make matters more complicated, my former lover has started to appear at the same regular conference my company sends me to. The first time we ran into each other we just said hi. Before long we were back to emailing, but usually just the week before we see each other. I think my former lover and I know we aren’t going to take things further than emails. Is that really terrible? Could it be okay to correspond as friends? We haven’t had sex for over five years. I love my wife and want to make my family work. Does that mean I have to tell her the truth? Please help. Love, Jerk Wife

Today, we have Francesca Esguerra, writer, performer, and cherished member of the Montréal storytelling community. Enjoy Francesca’s unrivalled wisdom on how to: - Survive and thrive as an only child- Become and stay fearlessly creative (+ BONUS pro tips on procrastination)- Use humour to redeem heartbreak, STIs, and other tragic circumstances- Weed out boring online dating peeps by being 150% yourself.Plus, what it’s like to work as a play and drama therapist, whether that means pretending you’re a zombie or reflecting feelings for a distressed child. And, Francesca has an imminent Fringe show, Two Lives, co-written and soon to be performed alongside the legendary Carole Tenbrink. About Francesca’s ShowGet Fresh presents Two Lives, a true storytelling show about living with one foot perched in la la land while the other foot tries its best to stay on the ground and do all the things that grown-up humans are supposed to do. It premiers at the St-Ambroise Montréal Fringe Festival from June 9 to June 18 at O Patro Vys (https://opatrovys.com/about), 356 Mont-Royal Ave. E. Get your tickets here: https://montrealfringe.online.red61.ca/event/2030:324/Show times: Friday, June 9 @ 7 PMSaturday, June 10 @ 4:15 PMSunday, June 11 @ 5:15 PMThursday, June 15 @ 6 PMFriday, June 16 @ 7:30 PMSunday, June 18 @ 12:30 PMAbout FrancescaGrowing up an only child, Francesca “had no choice but to figure out how to enjoy time alone.” So she just started making stuff. Her first great creative achievement occurred at age eight, when Francesca appointed herself editor and founder of the Canadian Girls Magazine. From there, Francesca went on to produce and direct plays to escape the tyranny of summers at Grand-mama’s house. After abandoning theatre for a literature degree, Francesca discovered her true calling in live storytelling shows. With her creativity reignited, she pursued a Masters in play and drama therapy. It didn’t take long for her to land a job at a safe haven for children and their moms who need temporary housing in the aftermath of an abusive relationship. Among her infinite talents, Francesca knits her own sweaters, sings, and displays prodigy-level success at online dating. She is known for her magnificent statement outfits and for infusing humour into life’s most devastating mishaps. Following her last victorious stint on Hinge, Francesca lives with her partner, dog, two cats, an aquarium of fish and a couple of shrimp. Francesca on Confabulation: The Shortest Story, Me, My Selfie, and IFollow Francesca on Instagram @uncle__franFrancesca’s headshot by Headshot by Selena Philips-Boyle (https://www.lifebyselena.ca)Tiny Ukulele Segment: Wrecking BallMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecSpecial thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, Big Heart Journey), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, Sherwin’s Quirky Events), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don't forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Website: ericajschmidt.comInstagram: @erica. j.schmidtYou can also write to Erica with a listener question. Today’s Listener Question from Swiped OutDear Erica (and Francesca),I’m really terrible at online dating. I’m a 31-year-old straight woman, I’ve been single for six years, and I’ve maxed out on trying to meet people in real life. I’m on all the apps but it’s rare that I get past the What’s up?/How was your weekend phase. When I do swing a coffee date, I find the dudes have no personality and even when I ask them more interesting questions, they aren’t that open to sharing and it’s not a fun time. My friends say my profile is charming and my pictures are hot. They say I am charming. But why are the dudes so boring? Is it realistic to find a quality person online? Am I doomed to be single forever?Love, Swiped Out

Back for more, we have Part 2 of my interview with Paul de Tourreil. It’s a celebration of honesty, creativity, self-love, perseverance, and the daily joys of being a person. We return to Attached’s Letter, where Paul offers zero-bullshit advice. Attached’s fraught situation leads Paul to get vulnerable about his recent romantic struggles, and how his default adult settings might have derailed a good thing. Luckily, the ensuing revelations left Paul with magnificent fodder for his fringe show which we all can’t wait to watch. And for our last topic, we delve into ROUTINES. Morning routines, creative routines, cleaning routines. If you’re stuck on a creative project, or just looking to get things done, this is your episode. It even wraps up with a tiny karaoke segment to awaken your creative spirit. Thank you so much, Paul! I had a real blast.(For Part 1 of Paul's interview, check out Episode 3, Default Adult Settings With Paul de Tourreil)About Paul:Paul de Tourreil is on Instagram @postitpaul https://www.instagram.com/postitpaul/Check out his website at https://postitpaul.ca/Learn more about his show here: https://postitpaul.ca/2023/04/15/9-lives-8-near-misses-life-lessons-from-near-death-events/Get your tickets here: https://montrealfringe.online.red61.ca/event/2030:237/10% of all proceeds go to The Native Women’s Shelter of Montréal: http://www.nwsm.info/donateSupport Paul’s show at gofund.me/702ddfffPaul’s Show: 9 Lives, 8 Near-Misses : life lessons from near-death events Paul’s Show Venue: ESPACE FREESTANDING ROOM 4324 Boulevard, Saint-Laurent, #300 Montreal, Quebec,  H2W 2R2 freestandingroom.comFriday, June 2 @ 9 p.m.Saturday, June 3 @ 6 p.m.Sunday, June 4 @ 6 p.m.Friday, June 9 @ 5 p.m.Saturday, June 10 @ 8 p.m.Sunday, June 11 @ 6 p.m.Thursday, June 15 @ 7 p.m.Friday, June 16 @ 6 p.m.Saturday, June 17 @ 9 p.m.Sunday, June 18 @ 5 p.m.Plugs and Resources:TJ Dawe, a marvellous playwriting teacher and fringe performer: https://www.tjdawe.caKaizen: the Japanese philosophy of continuous improvement.Write or Die, the website: https://v2.writeordie.comVoice to Text: https://otter.ai/Novel Writing Month: https://nanowrimo.orgFree Meditation App: https://www.oakmeditation.com/Tiny Ukulele Segment: Country RoadsMixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Special thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, https://www.bigheartjourney.com/), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, https://www.facebook.com/groups/851268551651989), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don't forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Website: ericajschmidt.comInstagram: @erica. j.schmidtYou can also write to Erica with a listener question Today’s Listener Question From Attached:Dear Erica (and Paul),I am about to enter my 36–40 age bracket. I spent my 31–35 age bracket with a boyfriend I’ll call Old Man Dad. OMD. I tend to refer to my partners as old men or dads because I seem to need supervision and reassurance through standard adult tasks. Me and OMD have always had great chemistry but there have been red flags from the start. He has a complicated relationship with his volatile ex who is controlling and financially manipulative. She calls all the shots in terms of custody so my bf is almost never available on evenings and weekends. There’s a ton of unspeakable drama and OMD also has chronic financial distress. Whenever I express concern or frustration that we don’t get to spend much quality time together, he bites my head off. He tends to put me down for being too needy and demanding and he criticizes me for having slept with other people before we got together and during breaks in our relationship. When I try to stick up for myself, he says I am too sensitive. We have probably broken up 49 times in the last four years. But I’m never able to call it quits for good. I love him and believe he’s a good person. But I don’t want to spend my 36–40 age bracket in a relationship that will never meet my needs. What should I do? Love, ATTACHEDPS: We had a few technical glitches during this recording. You may hear a tiny intermittent chirp in the background toward the end of the episode. The power went out and despite my best efforts, I could not silence the chirp. I did everything I could to minimize this interference in the recording and tried to make it as subtle as possible. Unfortunately, I could not completely get rid of it. My apologies! Perhaps you can pretend it is a benevolent imaginary bird friend. But I wanted to mention it in case you thought it was your tinnitus acting up.

This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is delighted to welcome Paul de Tourreil. Paul is a writer, fight choreographer, non-practising biologist, retired kung fu teacher, and self-described Swiss-Indian weirdo.He has written, produced and directed countless plays as part of the Montréal Fringe Festival. This year, 2023, Paul is thrilled to be performing his first ever solo show, 9 Lives, 8 Near Misses: life lessons from near-death events.In Part 1 of Paul’s two-part interview, we talk about Montréal’s beloved niche creative events, for example Sherwin Tija’s Slow Dance and Strip Spelling Bee. We offer the Coles Notes of Paul’s debut at Confabulation, Montréal’s beloved and longest running storytelling show. Paul shares his theories on default adult settings and how to avoid becoming a bitter and resentful human when you grow up, plus how to be a loving partner, friend, and parent, even if you didn’t get everything you needed when you were a kid. Erica asks Paul for advice on confidence, and she learns it has to do with competence and kung fu, any discipline or skill achieved through hard work and practice. Then we wrap up Part 1 with a doozie of a listener question from Attached. Be sure to hit up Paul’s second episode: Default Creative Settings With Paul de Tourreil. The best is yet to come!About Paul:Paul de Tourreil is on Instagram @postitpaul https://www.instagram.com/postitpaul/Check out his website at https://postitpaul.ca/Learn more about his show here: https://postitpaul.ca/2023/04/15/9-lives-8-near-misses-life-lessons-from-near-death-events/Get your tickets here: https://montrealfringe.online.red61.ca/event/2030:237/10% of all proceeds go to The Native Women’s Shelter of Montréal: http://www.nwsm.info/donateSupport Paul’s show at gofund.me/702ddfffPaul’s Show: 9 Lives, 8 Near-Misses : life lessons from near-death events At ESPACE FREESTANDING ROOM 4324 Boulevard, Saint-Laurent, #300 Montreal, Quebec,  H2W 2R2 gofund.me/702ddfffFriday, June 2 @ 9 p.m.Saturday, June 3 @ 6 p.m.Sunday, June 4 @ 6 p.m.Friday, June 9 @ 5 p.m.Saturday, June 10 @ 8 p.m.Sunday, June 11 @ 6 p.m.Thursday, June 15 @ 7 p.m.Friday, June 16 @ 6 p.m.Saturday, June 17 @ 9 p.m.Sunday, June 18 @ 5 p.m.Plugs and Resources:Sherwin’s Quirky Events (Slow Dance coming up June 2! You can catch it after Paul’s show.) https://www.facebook.com/groups/851268551651989Confabulation, Live Stories, True as We Can Tell Them: https://www.confabulation.ca/ Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, Quebec.Special thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, https://www.bigheartjourney.com/), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, https://www.facebook.com/groups/851268551651989), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don't forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review. This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram.Website: ericajschmidt.comInstagram: @erica. j.schmidtYou can also write to Erica with a listener question. Today’s Listener Question from Attached:Dear Erica (and Paul),I am about to enter my 36–40 age bracket. I spent my 31–35 age bracket with a boyfriend I’ll call Old Man Dad. OMD. I tend to refer to my partners as old men or dads bec:ause I seem to need supervision and reassurance through standard adult tasks. Me and OMD have always had great chemistry but there have been red flags from the start. He has a complicated relationship with his volatile ex who is controlling and financially manipulative. She calls all the shots in terms of custody so my bf is almost never available on evenings and weekends. There’s a ton of unspeakable drama and. OMD also has chronic financial distress. Whenever I express concern or frustration that we don’t get to spend much quality time together, he bites my head off. He tends to put me down for being too needy and demanding and he criticizes me for having slept with other people before we got together and during breaks in our relationship. When I try to stick up for myself, he says I am too sensitive. We have probably broken up 49 times in the last four years. But I’m never able to call it quits for good. I love him and believe he’s a good person. But I don’t want to spend my 36–40 age bracket in a relationship that will never meet my needs. What should I do? Love, AttachedPS: We had a few technical glitches during this recording. You may hear a tiny intermittent chirp in the background toward the end of the episode. The power went out and despite my best efforts, I could not silence the chirp. I did everything I could to minimize this interference in the recording and tried to make it as subtle as possible. Unfortunately, I could not completely get rid of it. My apologies! Perhaps you can pretend it is a benevolent imaginary bird friend. But I wanted to mention it in case you thought it was your tinnitus acting up.

Everyone says they have the best grandma. Not everyone is right. I am right. My grandma is the best. Her name is Mary Louise Adamson Owen, and back in March, she agreed to be my very first guest on This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life. “I can’t believe we’re doing this,” she said as we started recording. A natural podcast star, Mary shares about her first memories (and mishaps), her time in the Navy, suitors lost in WWII, motherhood, marriage, divorce, career changes, her renaissance after 50, writing her memoirs in her 80s, and what it’s like to be 96 going on 97. Mary offers solid proof that a sense of humour and a good cry can get us through just about anything. This episode is so special, I tear up just thinking about it. Love you, Grandma!MARY ADAMSON OWEN is a writer, WREN, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, gardener, dear friend, former schoolteacher, and retired career woman. In 1944, Mary joined the Women's Royal Canadian Naval Service (WRCNS), more lovingly known as the WRENS. After learning Morse code in Ste. Hyacinthe, Quebec, Mary was sent on a secret mission in Baccaro, Nova Scotia. There she helped to monitor a long-range navigation (LORAN) installation that sent private signals to Canada’s ships and planes. Her work was considered to be crucial to the war effort, and her fellow WRENS would become her lifelong friends. Looking back on her life, Mary considers her greatest accomplishment to be her three lovely children, who were all much easier to raise once they turned 24. Known for her vivacious sense of humour and the twinkle in her eye, Mary leaves a sparkle wherever she goes.  She lives in Perth, Ontario where she will celebrate her 97th birthday in early June. Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecUkulele Songs: See See My PlaymateMoon River (chords only, arrangement by Cynthia Lin))This Little Light of Mine (chords only)Grandma and the Wrens in the news: https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/d-day-code-breakers-women-1.5159789Special thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, https://www.bigheartjourney.com/), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, https://www.facebook.com/groups/851268551651989), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don't forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Website: ericajschmidt.comInstagram: @erica.j.schmidt

It’s a miracle! I managed to launch my podcast. Welcome to This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life, a podcast where I talk to people who may—or may not—have had the chance to transform their lives into a spectacular TED talk. In this debut solo episode, I introduce the show and do my best to interview myself. I revisit academic highlights from Mrs. Vanden Bosch’s grade one class circa 1991. Next, I unpack my very first morning routine, with accompanying thoughts on Gifted Child Syndrome. And I wrap up with a listener question from “Everyone Thought I’d Be Margaret Atwood by Now,” a tortured writer who fears she will never finish her novel. “This is your strange and beautiful life. You can do all sorts of interesting shit. But you don’t have to. Your life does not have to be a spectacular TED talk.” If you have a listener question, please get in touch with Erica via her contact page (https://www.ericajschmidt.com/contact) or Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/erica.j.schmidt/. Inspiring Books About Creativity: Bird by Bird by Anne LamottBig Magic by Elizabeth GilbertSplendid Books that Arose Following a Creative “Failure:”All This Could Be Different by Sarah Thankam Matthews: https://www.smathewss.com/Sorrow and Bliss by Meg Mason: https://megmason.com/books*Please support your indie bookstoresLoving shout-out to the song of Erica’s life, In the Aeroplane Over the Sea by Neutral Milk HotelErica’s letter to Mrs. Vanden Bosch was first performed at Grownups Read Things They Wrote as Kids, crucial listening for anyone looking to heal their Gifted Child Syndrome. Here’s episode 624 with six-year-old Erica kicking off the top of the show: https://grownupsreadthingstheywroteaskids.com/episode/624/Mixing, Ukulele, and Cover Art by Erica J. Schmidt in Montréal, QuebecSpecial thanks to Taes Leavitt (darling big sister, https://www.bigheartjourney.com/), Sherwin Tjia (technical and creative advisor, https://www.facebook.com/groups/851268551651989), and my dearly departed Eileen Gun, whose generous gift helped to fund my new podcast equipment. Thank you so much for listening! Stay tuned for more episodes extra soon. Don't forget to follow This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life on your favourite podcast platform. And if you enjoyed the episode, I would be immensely grateful if you could share it with a friend and/or leave a kind and enthusiastic rating and review.This Is Your Strange and Beautiful Life is brought to you by Lil and Bud dog cards, purchasable at ericajschmidt.com/merch. If you would like to sponsor the podcast, I would love to plug your product, service, or project as long as it doesn’t harm any people or their bodies. Please get in touch via my website or Instagram. Website: ericajschmidt.comInstagram: @erica.j.schmidt, https://www.instagram.com/erica.j.schmidt/