EPISODE · Feb 9, 2024 · 19 MIN
05 | Shifting Perspectives: Understanding Self and Partner Reactivity
from SHORESIDE: Without The Couch · host Laurie Groh MS LPC SAS
Join our Newsletter Join our WWP Facebook group Free Workshops and Worksheets In this episode, Laurie Groh, MS, LPC, SAS, discusses relationships and the importance of understanding our reactivity and defense mechanisms. She explains that people don't change for others and that therapy is not about changing your partner but about improving yourself. Laurie introduces five defense mechanisms: Lion (aggression) Peacock (self-preservation) Elephant (control) Turtle (withdrawal) Raccoon (manipulation) She provides action items for self-reflection, communication, and practicing empathy. Laurie also emphasizes the significance of seeking professional support and attending workshops to improve relationships. Takeaways Therapy is not about changing your partner, but about improving yourself. Understanding your own reactivity and defense mechanisms is crucial in relationships. The five defense mechanisms in relationships are Lion (aggression), Peacock (self-preservation), Elephant (control), Turtle (withdrawal), and Raccoon (manipulation). Practicing self-reflection, open communication, empathy, and the mindful pause technique can help improve relationships. Seeking professional support and attending Workshops can be beneficial for relationship growth. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Relationships 03:18 Understanding Reactivity in Relationships 05:14 Defense Mechanism: Lion 07:35 Defense Mechanism: Peacock 09:02 Defense Mechanism: Elephant 09:54 Defense Mechanism: Turtle 10:48 Defense Mechanism: Raccoon 12:16 Action Items: Self-Reflection and Communication 14:16 Adolescent Reactions and Mindful Pause Practice 18:28 Seeking Professional Support and Workshops This episode is brought to you by: OMGyes: Get your unlimited lifetime access to this groundbreaking material at the best prices available. GET YOUR UNLIMITED ACCESS TODAY! Shoreside Therapies: Shoreside Therapies offers compassionate, client-focused counseling for individuals, couples, and families. With expertise in mood disorders, life transitions, grief, trauma, and maternal mental health, their dedicated therapists provide a safe space to support your journey toward meaningful change and personal growth. Laurie's Top 5 Recommended Books on Relationships: Attached The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work The New Rules of Marriage Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
What this episode covers
<p><a href="https://wisconsinwellnesspodcast.com/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Join our Newsletter</strong></a> <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/1264788487555010/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong></strong></a></p><p><a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/1264788487555010/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Join our WWP Facebook group</strong></a> </p><p><a href="https://stan.store/lauriegroh" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Free Workshops and Worksheets</strong></a></p><p><br /></p><p>In this episode, <a href="https://www.vitalmindscounseling.com/lauriegrohtherapist" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Laurie Groh, MS, LPC, SAS</a>, discusses relationships and the importance of understanding our reactivity and defense mechanisms. She explains that people don't change for others and that therapy is not about changing your partner but about improving yourself. </p><p><br /></p><p><strong>Laurie introduces five defense mechanisms: </strong></p><p><em>Lion</em> (aggression)</p><p><em>Peacock</em> (self-preservation)</p><p><em>Elephant</em> (control)</p><p><em>Turtle</em> (withdrawal)</p><p><em>Raccoon</em> (manipulation)</p><p><br /></p><p>She provides action items for self-reflection, communication, and practicing empathy. Laurie also emphasizes the significance of seeking professional support and attending workshops to improve relationships.</p><p><br /></p><p><strong>Takeaways</strong></p><p>Therapy is not about changing your partner, but about improving yourself.</p><p>Understanding your own reactivity and defense mechanisms is crucial in relationships.</p><p>The five defense mechanisms in relationships are Lion (aggression), Peacock (self-preservation), Elephant (control), Turtle (withdrawal), and Raccoon (manipulation).</p><p>Practicing self-reflection, open communication, empathy, and the mindful pause technique can help improve relationships.</p><p>Seeking professional support and attending <a href="https://stan.store/lauriegroh" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Workshops </a> can be beneficial for relationship growth.</p><p><br /></p><p><strong>Chapters</strong></p><p>00:00 Introduction to Relationships</p><p>03:18 Understanding Reactivity in Relationships</p><p>05:14 Defense Mechanism: Lion</p><p>07:35 Defense Mechanism: Peacock</p><p>09:02 Defense Mechanism: Elephant</p><p>09:54 Defense Mechanism: Turtle</p><p>10:48 Defense Mechanism: Raccoon</p><p>12:16 Action Items: Self-Reflection and Communication</p><p>14:16 Adolescent Reactions and Mindful Pause Practice</p><p>18:28 Seeking Professional Support and Workshops</p><p><br /></p><p><strong>This episode is brought to you by:</strong></p><p><a href="OMGYES" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer"><strong>OMGyes</strong></a>: Get your unlimited lifetime access to this groundbreaking material at the best prices available.</p><p>GET YOUR UNLIMITED ACCESS TODAY!<a href="https://stan.store/lauriegroh" r
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05 | Shifting Perspectives: Understanding Self and Partner Reactivity
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