110 - The quiet (and unspoken) guilt

Have you ever been out with friends, laughing and enjoying yourself, then suddenly felt guilty because your husband is at home struggling? Or felt relieved to have a peaceful evening without him there - only to feel terrible for even thinking that? When you love someone struggling with alcohol or addiction, guilt can creep into the most unexpected moments. In Episode 110 of Addiction Makes Three, Amanda shares her own experience of losing touch with her happiness, including the heartbreaking moment she realised how long it had been since she'd heard herself laugh. We talk about the guilt that comes with loving someone who is struggling - and why you don't have to put your own life on hold to prove you care. In this episode: Why having fun or spending time with friends can leave you feeling guilty Feeling bad for wanting space or enjoying the peace when your partner isn't home The heartbreak of seeing your children disappointed or living a different childhood from the one you imagined Why trying to make up for everything can leave you exhausted Feeling guilty for still being hurt or unhappy when your husband is sober and working on his recovery How to distinguish guilty feelings from the things you're actually responsible for Keep listening If this episode resonates, explore these conversations next: Episode 109: Are You Waiting for Him to Get Better Before You Can Be Happy? Episode 107: They've Stopped Drinking. Why Are Things Still So Hard? Ready for support with the how? If you're carrying guilt, worry and responsibility and you're unsure what to do next, Amanda's eight-week group programme, Recovery Reclaimed Together, offers practical support for women who love someone struggling with alcohol or addiction. You don't need your partner to be sober, and you don't have to decide whether you're staying or leaving before getting support for yourself. Find out more about Recovery Reclaimed Together It's my eight-week guided program for people impacted by a loved one's addiction, where we work through the everyday situations that can feel so difficult to navigate. With practical tools, group coaching and a supportive private community, you'll learn how to respond to challenging situations, understand what's yours to take responsibility for and start making changes that support your own wellbeing. You don't have to wait for your husband to stop drinking, admit there's a problem or go to rehab before you can get support for yourself. Find out more about Recovery Reclaimed Together And if you're unsure whether it's right for you, you can email me at [email protected] You don't have to solve everything that's happening with your husband before you can begin looking after yourself.