147. He Promises a Future, But Gives You Crumbs

Send Gemma a messageWARNING: This episode contains natural bird songs, twigs breaking & leaves crushing underfoot, the occasional breathlessnes and the distant sound of kids playing in a park 😊 Love Wisely is starting again soon! If you have been waiting for your chance to join me for the next 3-month journey to rewrite you Love Template, sign up below!. What does it really mean for someone to be available for a relationship?In this walking episode, I explore one of the most painful forms of emotional unavailability: becoming attached to someone who is still entangled with another woman.Perhaps he says the marriage is over.Perhaps they still live together “for the children.”Perhaps he promises that once the separation, divorce or living arrangements are resolved, the two of you can finally have a proper relationship.Meanwhile, you are left waiting, hoping and accepting small pieces of connection from someone who is not genuinely free to build a life with you.In this episode, I discuss:The difference between being separated and being truly availableHow promises about the future can keep you emotionally investedWhy intermittent attention and small acts of care can feel so powerfulThe role of abandonment and emotional deprivation schemasWhy an unavailable person can sometimes feel safer than a real relationshipHow implicit recognition draws us towards familiar emotional dynamicsWhy being given crumbs can slowly erode your self-worthThe importance of choosing someone who is emotionally and practically freeI also share a personal experience of becoming emotionally attached to a married and unavailable man, and what that experience helped me understand about my own schemas.If you are waiting for someone’s circumstances to change before they can fully choose you, this episode is an invitation to step back and look honestly at what is being offered to you now.You deserve more than promises, fragments of attention and a place at the edge of someone else’s life.Love WiselyIf you have a recurring pattern of becoming attached to emotionally unavailable, avoidant or narcissistic partners, my Love Wisely group coaching experience begins in September.Inside the program, I guide a small group of women through the process of understanding and intentionally rewriting the unconscious Love Template that has shaped their relationship choices.Join the Love Wisely priority list through the link in the show notes.Support the show🩷LOVE WISELY Priority List, join to get notified about the next Group🎓 NEW - Love Wisely Foundations Course - Get Instant Access!✅Dating App Profile CHECK-UP🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide💛 Elevate You Worth - Healing Audio Bundle (50% off only for listeners) - Use coupon WORTHY Connect with Me 📩[email protected]  🌐 Website: drgemmagladstone.com 📷 Instagram: @drgemmacoaching🌻 Support the Podcast 🙏Love the show? Help us keep going with a monthly contribution: Support here