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It's just for people who love podcasts, whether you make podcasts or just really love listening to them. It's happening on January 19th in 20th in Seattle and there will be tons of amazing podcasts represented. I'm going to do a list, but it's going to be incomplete. Welcome to Night Vale.
My brother and me, 99% invisible, the stoop, lore, hello from Magic Tavern, Nancy, same sander from It's Been a Minute, Oh No, Ross and Carrie, Demi and Meel from Punch Up at Jam. Tons more. We'll be doing a live-dear hink and John and there will be lots of other fun, weird, cool things like live shows, podcast, mashups, performances, panels, ghost stories, and other good weirdness. Just go to PodCon.com for more information and to support us in these final hours.
Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John. It's a comedy podcast for two brothers and your questions. Give you the advice and bring you all the weeks news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon John. Yes.
Why were the Mongols so happy? Why were the Mongols so happy, Hank? Because they were no mads. I love this new opening bit.
I love that you tell a dad joke and then I took to share something that's good this week. So John, what's good this week? Besides my very good dad joke about Mongols. That was a very good joke.
Hank, do you remember the couple who we tracked down their wedding website through somewhat nefarious means and it was an unfinished website and we made fun of it? Yes, I do. It was not great. It almost seemed maybe possibly incomplete and maybe we shouldn't have mocked it?
Right, because they weren't ready to share it yet. We got a very nice email from Josh explaining that they just weren't done with their wedding website, which is why they hadn't told anyone about it. And it wasn't Josh's fault that we tracked it down through somewhat nefarious means. Anyway, they are now finished with their wedding website and I just wanted to give you an update Hank because it is the greatest wedding website I have ever seen in my entire life.
Like, I don't know who designed this site but I want them to design my new website. They have an app available in both the Apple store and the Google Play Store. Oh god, this is good. But like, can we set the bar lower for just everything?
I just like it. I feel like I feel like you guys are setting the bar way too high. I don't need it. I don't want it.
I don't need an app. It's a great wedding website. Their guys are doing a party is hilarious. Their stories about how they met each other are so great and it's just also well done.
And as apology for the fact that we tracked down your website before you were ready. Kathy and Josh Hank and I have purchased you a fancy dinner at the Eiffel Tower which by the way I learned this week does have a bathroom near the top of it. But it's got pipes all the way down to the bottom. That's good because you don't want to get up there and be like, I got to book.
There's a countdown on their wedding website, John. It's counting down as I'm staring at it. It's 214 days away. How is your website?
Look this good? 214 days out. I just don't have time for this. You are too organized.
To be fair, Hank, they probably weren't going to get it out this quickly but then we made fun of them. And they felt like their hand was forced. So are they going? Are they going to Paris for their honeymoon or do you just hear this like you figure out how to get there?
They are going to Paris for their honeymoon and we have bought them dinner at the Eiffel Tower as an apology. So congratulations to Kathy and Josh both on their forthcoming marriage and on a really spectacular website. Hank, should we answer some questions from our listeners? All right, John.
This first question comes from Nick who asks, Dear Hank and John, I rarely hear or see YouTubers citing their sources when clearly stating information that came from somewhere other than their own minds. While I do sometimes see a link to an article or a video that holds the information from which the YouTuber got it, this doesn't appear to be common practice. Are YouTubers not required to practice any sort of rules of source citation? Yeah, Nick, no.
I love it. By what governing body, Nick? I love it. I love it.
You think that's possible because like when we're going to school, all the teachers are like, you got to cite your sources. Here's all the different ways you can cite your sources. You got to use the Chicago manual of style or whatever. And yeah, and then you'll make a YouTube video and there are no rules because it's the internet and you can literally say anything.
Welcome to 2018. Yeah, I mean, imagine if everybody had to cite their sources on Facebook, there would be no Facebook. Oh, it's way too much work. The entire people who work for social media companies talk about like the barrier to expression.
So like, what, how can we lower the barrier to posting? They want it to be very easy for new content to be created because content is the thing that makes the platform work. And so on Twitter, they make it basically so that any dumb thought that plops out of your mind becomes useful enough for you to be like, well, you know, it's a tweet. And it's very easy to post.
Same thing with like Instagram stories or Snapchat stories. The idea is like make it so easy to create content that everyone will do it. And make like putting a barrier in that is that is as boring and frustrating as citing your sources. Ha, good luck.
We should add though that Nick in his email cited all of his sources, which I thought was very impressive. We try to do this in Crash Course. We don't always do it. And we especially didn't do it at the beginning.
But we do think it's important and we're trying to put more of an emphasis on it in our educational content because we need people to understand that we didn't just make this stuff up and that we're doing our best not to just guess. The reason it doesn't happen on YouTube is because it's work. And a lot of times that work is expensive and time consuming and it doesn't feel as central to the mission as, for instance, making or animating the video. Right, which is why there are all kinds of signals in academia to force you to do this because in many ways, like the work isn't worthwhile unless you can figure out, you know, unless you can build on the work and you can't build on the work without knowing where the information came from, especially because sometimes information turns out to not be good.
And if the information came from somewhere and you're not sure where and you can't check and you can't see if it has since been known to not be good information, then you cannot actually build knowledge that way. And so I think that a good sign of credible content on the internet is that they do cite their sources. And we have tried to do that more and we do it on Crash Course, but we certainly don't do it every time on Vlogbrothers just because it's work and we got all that stuff to do and it's not supposed to be work. It's supposed to be fun, right?
Vlogbrothers, it's supposed to be woo-woo, not sit in my sources. I'm done with school. I cite my sources in informational videos, actually. But I like that Nick is basically saying I care and I think more of us need to care and by the act of caring, the incentives will change.
So thank you, Nick. You're the hero we need. If not the hero we deserve. The next question comes from Naomi who writes Dear John and Hank, I recently went to my local bookstore and bought a used copy of an abundance of Catherine's, which I had already read.
Well, thank you, Naomi, for liking it enough to purchase it. When I got home, I opened it up to find a note that looked like it had been typed on a typewriter and it said, hope you like this book, smiley face. P.S., you have an incredibly malefluous voice and then a phone number. I was very confused as the stranger had left me their number in a book and wanted me to call them.
I looked up the number and it's from Arkansas. I'm opposed to calling strange numbers, but we have the same taste in books. So I don't know what to do. Help, not a Catherine, Naomi.
Good, John. So like first update is that back in that book came out. Was it that book? No.
It was a paper town. Yeah. It was paper town. But we had this thing where we had people leave notes inside of John Green books telling people basically a way to communicate in the real world to leave a comment and were called Nerdfighter Notes.
And I had assumed that all of the Nerdfighter Notes had been discovered by now, but apparently not. Apparently not. Although it does seem weird to say P.S., you have an incredibly malefluous voice, which it's just presumptuous. However, I am going to call the phone number.
You're going to call the phone number. He's going to call the phone number. Yeah, but not with my phone. I'm no dummy.
I got to get shared and hold on. Shared and wants to sit here until I'm finished to make sure that I don't miss user phone, which is totally reasonable. Here we go. We're calling the number.
I don't know who I'm calling. That's probably not. Oh, okay. That was fast.
The mailbox is full. It's full. Oh, oh, oh, this, by the way, this happens every time I call my brother Hank Green. I don't know how to empty my mailbox.
He doesn't answer the phone. And then I'm told that the mailbox is full. So I literally can't leave him a message except to text him. But don't worry.
He doesn't reply to texts. How do you, delete voice messages? I just don't know. Like why?
I don't understand. I don't know. Look, look, okay. This is something I don't understand.
I can have like, I have gigabytes of space on in my email. Why can't my voicemails just be stored in the same system so that I don't have to constantly delete voicemails? Why? Why don't I want to keep my voicemails?
I don't understand. Just put them on the Google Drive with all the other files in the cloud. I can upload literally anything I want to YouTube, but I can't keep a freaking voicemail. I'm glad that you have found something really important to be outraged about Hank because that does seem to me one of the leading problems of 2018 that it is difficult to store as many voicemails as we would like.
I'm just upset that I can't call this person and it appears that we're never going to be in contact ever again. So it's a bummer. It is a bummer. Like, like, oh, oh, missed opportunity, everybody.
That probably the number isn't in service anymore. Or they're just like me and don't know how to delete voicemails. This next question comes from Allison who asks, Dear Hank and John, I am currently dating a very sweet guy and it's all going very well. However, he often compliments me by saying things like, I look beautiful.
My problem is, I do not feel like there's a socially acceptable way for me to tell him that he is also beautiful. I realize that I could tell him he is handsome, but that word feels awkward and formal. I would just break free of these laws of social acceptability and say that he's beautiful because he is, but I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable when I'm trying to compliment him. So I'm turning to my two favorite podcasters for a help.
Not a stoner, Allison. What does that mean? Is Allison stoner a thing? Who's Allison stoner?
I think that she's on how I met your mother. No, that's definitely not. That's Allison Hanigan. Allison stoner is she saw from Cheaper by the dozen from 2003, also in multiple step-ups.
She was on the sweet life of Zack and Cody. Yeah, I think she was in step-up three, take it to the streets. She was in several different step-ups, but I'm glad that Allison stoner, born 1993, is a great candidate for this week in Ryan's at least. John, do you have any good things to call Allison's boyfriend?
I would just go with hot. That's what I usually use or handsome, but I would also not be afraid of beautiful. What was the second step-up movie called? Oh, God, the streets?
I think that was the streets. Hold on. I don't do the streets. She doesn't appear to have been in the second one, which was the best one, which is so good.
I feel bad if Allison stoner listens to this podcast and she finds out that she wasn't in what was by far the best step-up movie, but she wasn't. It's so hard to get this man to focus. He's 40 years old, everyone. Focus.
I am focused. What is the question? I asked Catherine this question. I went to a source and I was like, what would you say if you ever wanted to tell a man that he was attractive?
Yep. And she said, you got to go with Fit. Yeah, isn't that what English people say? I like that.
I like Fit. I also like handsome. What's wrong with handsome? It doesn't seem that old fashioned to me, although I guess I am technically an old person.
So what do I know? What about like, oh, you're looking dapper today? Do you know that the first step-up movie has a 19% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes? Oh my goodness.
And the consensus states that quote, this trite teen romance has too little plot and not enough dancing. I mean wrong on both counts, sir. How did step up to the streets do? Step up to the streets is only 27% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes.
What are these critics thinking? Step up to the streets is one of the greatest films of all freaking time. I've watched it at least two times and it has a 76% liked its score from the audience, which, let's be honest, who cares what the critics think? And John, do you think that there's something deeper at play where we can't call men beautiful, where we feel like that's weird?
Do you want to get into it? Not only do I think there's something deeper at play, Hank, I think it is actually related to the reason that 73% of professional movie critics thought that Step Up to the Streets was a bad movie. I think we have all of these ideas about what constitutes good and bad and beautiful. And I think that toxic masculinity plays a role in what kind of movies are treated as being high quality movies.
And I think toxic masculinity plays a role in what kind of people are talked about as being beautiful. Like one of the critics wrote, this isn't a very good movie, but it's probably the best of its kind, which to me is just exactly what's wrong with a certain strain of criticism. Like to me, the job of criticism in art is not to say what is high art, what is properly good. The job is to say like what accomplishes, what it sets out to accomplish, and is what it sets out to accomplish interesting and beautiful.
And the answer for Step Up to the Streets is yes and yes. Absolutely. It was a beautiful movie. And Alice's boyfriend is also beautiful.
And but if you're gonna make uncomfortable saying it, you could just say you looking good today, sweetie. I might say something like if you were a Step Up movie, you would be Step Up to the Streets, baby. This next question comes from Brooklyn who asks dear H&J, an unforeseen circumstance has occurred. My cousin, Brooklyn with his boyfriend.
They have been going out for 10 months, the boyfriend got along with the family super well and I became fairly close with him bonding over school and such. He's three years older than me, same as my cousin. And I'm not really in the same social setting as either of them, mostly due to this age difference. But he's really nice.
I really like talking to him, but I think it would be awkward to hang out or talk to him because I don't get out much anyway. Not a boy, not a bridge, not a burrow or a vacuum, Brooklyn. What a great sign off. Yeah, it's good.
This is a fairly common problem in the world where we have people into our lives because they're entering through another person that has already our lives, but then they don't have that relationship with that person anymore. And who do we pick or do you have to pick? And sometimes you do. Yep.
Sometimes you do have to pick. And if it's family, you got it. You got to go with family. You do usually have to go with family.
That said, it doesn't seem clear to me that in this situation, Brooklyn does have to pick. I feel like Brooklyn could text or email this person and say, Hey, I just or just say, Hey, how are you doing? Just check in on them. I think it's really nice to have people check in on you.
And they might respond, they might not, but at least it puts the ball in their court and it lets them know that you do care about them separate from your relationship with your cousin. But what I would say very strongly is if you have any romantic interest in this person, do not pursue any relationship at all. If you're thinking, well, we could just be friends. But I do think that they're pretty cute.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Except maybe, you know, I don't know why you remember the plot of Step Up to the Street Tank, but the whole story doesn't happen if there isn't a little bit of that.
That was, I would like to officially announce that is my last step up to the streets reference for the entire plot. Don't make promises. You can't keep this next question comes from Becky who writes Dear John and Hank, at the turtles all the way down to her last year, my best friend and I made posters for the show in Indianapolis. We were both very excited at the time, but then afterwards we realized were we a bit too crazy.
Now that we've gotten our tickets for the absolutely remarkable thing to her coming up in Indianapolis, we are wondering, should we make posters again? Please answer as we are stressed out and don't want to be too overwhelming. Make posters and also encourage others. So what you want to do is bring everybody else up to your level.
Not go down to theirs. Right. You want to bring everybody else up. So organize poster creation party times at your local library.
I'm strongly in favor of posters. Becky, I will tell you a story about early in my career. Early in my career as a writer, I did a signing with a writer named Stephanie Meyer who wrote the Twilight books and I hadn't met her before and I wasn't very familiar with her work. It was right after the first Twilight book had come out and we did this, we did this sign together with a little event before where we all talked a little bit about each of our books.
They were like four authors there and in the front row there were all these people with handmade t-shirts about the world of Twilight and I was so blown away by that and I was so moved by it and I remember thinking I don't write those kind of books. Like I don't write the kind of books that people get that excited about and feel that passionately about and I was just so blown away by the passion of that fandom and the excitement and I was honestly jealous of it and then when Paper Towns came out I saw for the first time people holding posters wearing t-shirts, people dressing like Margot Roth Spiegelman making t-shirts like the t-shirts that she had in the book and it was one of that tour was one of the best experiences of my life for that reason so do not worry that you are not being cool because that kind of passion it's infectious and it really makes the world better. Yeah and I remember once I did a live stream in between two tour stops and then I arrived at the next tour stop and there were people who had made handmade t-shirts referencing the live stream that I did the night before and that just made me so happy. Yeah and I think that like showing people and showing yourself how much you care about something is a really it's a net positive for everybody involved so yeah go overboard.
Especially if Overboard for you was making a poster which is just really lovely. Yeah don't go so far overboard that you like build a shrine I think that's the line. Do you have candles that you keep lit all the time that flicker in the face of Leonard Nimoy or whatever that's that's too far. You need to tone down your Leonard Nimoy passion a little bit.
Agreed. Agreed. Anything that could cause a fire hazard in general is overboard worship though John I do I do love Leonard Nimoy. Do you have another question for us?
I do this one comes from Sarah who writes do you John and Hank I grew up in a family that doesn't listen to music if I get all. Okay I grew up to the sounds of NPR audio books and maybe the occasional classical or Christian radio station. Now that I've gotten older and have access to music of my own I don't know where to start there's so much music out there I can relate to that like I get on Spotify and I'm like man a lot of people have made this stuff I have no idea what to listen to people have told me to just listen to different genres and I'll be able to tell what I like but I can't really pin down any specific genres or bands that I like more than others it's just also new and so good I guess my question is how do you figure out what your musical days are when there are infinite options do you have any bands that you recommend scrolling through Spotify Sarah before John starts yes he has bands to recommend and it's just one of them but but but I what I will say before John makes his recommendation is I have a broad overarching piece of advice which is to pick and when you're younger it's so much easier to pick because you are given these signals that like this is the thing we should be paying attention to by your friend group by your culture by the radio by whatever and like and you know what's good and you don't have to question it and but because we're a little bit older now there's like oh there's so much stuff there's all these all these different layers to every genre and and also like music has been happening for the last thousand years so there's also all that stuff that it's very difficult to pick but I think it's really good and I have a hard time doing this but I am much happier about music when I pick something to dive into for a little while and spend some time like going through a catalog of an artist and developing a deeper relationship with with songs that I've heard not just a few times but like dozens of times I'm gonna recommend the mountain goats they're really good bands Sarah I think that you like them they're the best band in the whole world they they have like 800 or 900 songs so you'll never be out of new mountain goat songs or at least not for a long time plus they're always making new ones they're so great I do really recommend the mountain goats but I have to say I also listen to a lot of jazz music I listen to a lot of New Orleans brass big band music I listen to bluegrass music I I agree with Hank that it's fun to dive deep it's fun for me like it's a matter of going through phases there's stuff that I like to listen to when I'm running that's different than the stuff I like to listen to when I'm you know working but I love that I just the thing I loved about this question Hank was Sarah saying it's also new and so good yeah because music is so good there is so much great music in the world and we are so lucky to live in an age of recorded music so that we can actually listen to it even if we aren't rich enough to be able to go to fancy concerts John since you made your one suggestion for one band I have to give Sarah a suggestion one band for you to maybe dive deep on I'm gonna go with with fountains of wane I mean Sarah and their new hit song Hank and John have got it going on and also a purple tank because just calling it all the way back to year one of your Hank and John so just to be absolutely clear about this Sarah Hank is kidding actually you know you want to know a really good album if you're just starting to listen to music you want to know a really genuinely good album to listen to because I think soundtracks are good for that stuff because it gives you a broad kind of introduction to a bunch of different kinds of music would be the soundtrack for Step Up To The Streets it's got yeah low by flow by flow by those that's a good song it's such a good song it's one of Henry's favorite songs actually so I hear it all the time there's two Missy Elliot songs on it I think that Missy Elliot is maybe the pop music artist that we'll be listening to in like the 23rd century assuming there's no humans I think that she's like the the Beethoven of right now there's all kinds of great songs T-Pain Church T-Pain's Church is a that is an unbearable song like you hear it and you cannot do anything but move it's so good oh they called back Hank they called back they called back they called back they called back they called back they called back they called back they called back Sharon and just came in there and they called back I'm calling them now I'm calling now I'm calling now oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh oh oh do they only turn their phone on occasionally god the mailbox is still full they're gonna be a metal box it's always miss all right when they call the next time we just answer and bring it into me it's real weird this is weird weird I have a conspiracy theory now I'm a little worried about Sheridan because it's her phone you know I guess one last thing I'll say to Sarah is that it's it's good to like popular music it's popular for a reason and and you can focus in on that and it's not like it's not like it's not cool to listen to pop music it's not all popular for a reason but I hear you I think it's I think there's always a reason John it's just not always the best reason this next question comes from Amanda who asks dear Hank and John you know there's a finite amount of water on earth the same water just continuously flows through the water cycle and the amount of water on earth stays the same but what about when meteors or comets enter the atmosphere and occasionally hit earth aren't they just rocks and ice does that mean that new water is introduced to earth does the amount of water on earth increase if ever so slightly I hope this question isn't too demanding DFTBA Amanda that's some hard work you did there do you think that when Amanda is like in a work situation she says things like I don't want to make a demand but it's like what her colleagues call her right oh there's demand full of demands Hank does the amount of water on earth go up when we get hit by big water meteors it does it does in fact um there is some there's some different models that are out of run and and lots of people are still you know working on this problem but uh current research indicates that if we didn't have that source of external water that there wouldn't be much water on earth that it would have all been blown off by the solar wind by now and so we need new inputs of water or elsewhere in trouble so especially there was a period of time where a lot of icy bodies hit earth and uh and that and probably a lot of the water that's on earth right now was not part of the initial formation of earth it arrived a little later so should I be rooting for us to get hit by water meteors now no no no okay all right i'll do it against that yep definitely root against large meteor strikes if you're gonna if there's like a uh i don't know i don't know how much it matters how strongly people support one team or another uh like if one team's fans are just really gung ho and the other ones are very quiet if that's actually good for the team but i do know that if we just sit here and think really hard about not getting hit by a meteor it's not going to help yeah no that's the great thing about getting hit by a meteor um nothing will help it's just a nice pleasant reminder that we are not in control we're in control of a lot of things john i'm in control apparently of my voicemail inbox which hold on i'm gonna i'm gonna try that i'm gonna try that number again oh i can't i of course i don't know shared its password okay you can only answer the phone okay i can only answer the phone all right thank this next question comes from tomomi who asks dear john and hanks since you guys don't talk about death at all anymore on this comedy podcast about death i need to ask you about death in the distant future how will humans die what kind of inventions will there be for death well hopefully we won't invent any new inventions for death but i mean it's funny that we're having getting this question right after the question where we went straight meteor strike yeah that wouldn't necessarily result in broad death would it uh depends on what you mean by broad death and depends on what you mean by meteor strike i think it's just like a nice water meteor you know that just drops a bunch of nice delicious clean space water it turns out that it doesn't really matter what the meteor is well it doesn't matter what the meteor is made of but uh an icy meteor it can do a whole like a whole lot of damage it just makes a nice like space lake you just want a big wet one just rains on down will everyone know the base base kiss well i want i want i want the solar system to give you a good good wet tungi kiss french space kisses will everyone know the date of their death when they're born will death be fun deathly curious to mamae i don't think i like i like where tamae's coming from though yeah uh why not i like i like it because it's like here are a couple examples of dystopias everybody's just looking forward to it they're like oh god did you know i get to die on Tuesday i have no idea how our relationship to death will change as lives get longer and healthier i think it has already changed a lot though in the sense that death used to be something that was unavoidable and part of everyday life in a way that in the rich world at least it isn't anymore well what i what my only big guess is that as we get better at living longer it will be very bad if that isn't distributed fairly equally among societies yes well it already is very bad i would submit but it will it will get much worse and uh and that that that is my most that is my biggest concern about like like life span extension is that uh is that we'll give it to our dogs before we give it to other people and that will be really bad not just for the people who aren't getting the treatments but also for the people who die in the revolution yeah i think i agree i think one of the biggest challenges with new technologies that improve human life is having them be shared among all humans indeed john which is why this podcast is brought to you in part by a an organization that doesn't get to sponsor a ton of stuff all that often so we're glad that they're here sponsoring us today it's justice um just having things that should be available to all people be available to more people yeah it's a little trouble giving me that justice doesn't have as big a marketing budget as for instance tied but what can you do what can you do today's podcast is also brought to you by Leonard Nimoy Leonard Nimoy it's okay to worship him just not with candles it's a fire hazard this podcast is also brought to you by music it's a bunch of noises but it's real good and lastly today's podcast is brought to you of course by step up to the streets step up to the streets the greatest of all step up movies although i actually thought step up three was was a really good movie as well we also have a project for awesome message from mike ganist on most things to hank and john and elasties and all of the friends i've made through nernfiteria thank you for inspiring me to be more positive compassionate loving and grateful every day thank you for making this community a solvus i can turn to day or night when i'm feeling lonely or social happy or sad whether we've met in person or i've never met you in a physical space thank you for being in my life and letting me be a small part of yours you know it's also a good dance movie uh break into electric boogaloo that's what i was gonna say ah well we're you know we're roughly the same age oh my god i love that movie oh i wonder if it holds up there's only one way to find out john and that's to do uh break into electric boogaloo project for awesome commentary perk with hank and john it's on netflix it's on netflix it's on netflix we can watch it tonight let's just let's live stream let's do it tonight well i actually tonight i'm busy let's do it soon okay okay i bet it's gonna be really good all right i'm so excited about this this is such good news all right break into electric boogaloo which i'm sure holds up perfectly i mean i loved it so much oh god i loved it so much it must be good it must be good it was the grease to was there a break in one you know i don't think there was smart smart smart to start with the sequel oh wow it doesn't have a great imdb rating john well that doesn't mean that it's not a good movie it just means that movie snobs don't like it there was a break in there was break in and then there was break into electric boogaloo but it looks like break into was much more popular than than breaking they both came out in the same year of course i mean when you have a hit follow it up man holy moly that was fast this episode of your hand can jump through you by shampify there are a lot of things that stand between i have an idea and this is an idea that actually exists in the world and people are buying things from me and that is what shopify makes easier when you start with shopify the tools to design and launch and take payments they're all there from day one you don't have to build a whole machine before you can start building the business and this is important because you also have to look good and with shopify's templates you could get a site set up really quick that looks credible and professional without needing to code or duct tape a bunch of different tools together and when things look real that works on my brain to be like i'm doing a real thing it also works on other people's brains to be like this is legitimate shopify also has one of the best check out systems on the internet it's built to help customers finish the purchase effectively and efficiently without a bunch of roadblocks returning customers can check out with a single click that means less friction and fewer abandoned carts and a smoother experience for everybody that stuff gives you confidence early on and it gives other people confidence in what you're doing you're not wondering whether the payment system is 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pieces again and again which is why i keep coming back to quince i often wear either a long sleeve or a short sleeve button down from quince and it fits well and i never have any complaints in fact sometimes i get compliments about it i was at the airport a couple days ago i often find myself in airports and someone said i like your shirt and i said thanks it's from quince quince's 100 european linen pants and shirts are breathable easy to throw on in the summer upgrade your rotation needs starting at just 34 dollars their teas are soft enough to live in all day and the lightweight cotton sweaters are exactly what you want when those summer nights cool down so that's why i'm wearing quince this summer and you can make your summer wardrobe easier by going to quince.com slash deer hank for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in canada too that's qunce.com for free shipping and 365 day returns quince.com slash deer hank this episode of deer hank and john is brought to you by factor imagine for a moment that you are absolutely immersed in some work where you're creating something beautiful or useful or useless and ugly but you love it anyway and you look up and suddenly you have a feeling and that feeling is that it is 2.30 p.m and that you did not eat lunch what are you gonna do are you gonna get meal delivery that's gonna cost too much and maybe be a bit of a mistake or are you gonna go to the cupboard and just eat several fistfuls of peanuts because those are my two choices unless i have a factor in the fridge you can get smoky barbecue chicken breast with potato mash cream corn and peppers you can get creamy lemon pepper chicken with veggie rice peel off broccoli and carrots this has the fiber I need it has the protein I need and it has the deliciousness I need what about garlic herb roasted barramundi with potato zucchini and burr blanc sauce I don't really know what that means but it sounds delicious what about a black bean taco bowl with corn salsa and cilantro crema a delicious high fiber high protein meal that no animals had to die for any of those can be ready in two minutes fresh never frozen over a hundred rotating weekly meals including globally inspired flavors like Mediterranean and Asian factor shops perhaps cooks and delivers straight to your door so you have more time for everything you love this spring head to factor meals dot com slash deer hank 50 off and use the code deerhank 50 off to get 50 off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only wild supplies last until September 27th 2026 see website for more details all right john this next question comes from grace who asks deerhank and john how do forecasters know that it's going to rain in 10 days amazing grace they don't it is amazing they don't it's true that they don't it's true they don't know but they do have they do have some ability to predict beyond flipping a coin which is pretty pretty cool yeah but it's not that much better than flipping a coin 10 days out it's true five days out though is actually like we've gotten to the point where five days out is is extremely accurate compared to where we were even 10 years ago and that is really like five days is a long time to have yeah even somewhat accurate forecasts of temperature of wind speed of rain yep it's really it's really amazing and how do we do that um we do it with lots of computer models very powerful computers and lots and lots of inputs so constantly updating from weather stations all over the place what every condition is from barometric pressure to wind speed to humidity to and like and like knowing where things are going to move so we can model out into the future right and we also have lots of data from history yeah to work with as well yeah for a little bit of context when hey can i wear kids weather forecasts were often wrong about like that day like they'd be wrong about whether or not it was going to rain in two hours yeah yeah and it's hard when it's like spotty and so it's going to rain in one place in your in your coverage area and not in not in another place in that coverage area but but it is amazing but i will say that it's probably we're bumping up against some of the limits of what we can forecast because ultimately some of this does come down to chaos and randomness and just like the intricacies of how a cloud can form might affect you know what what's going to happen 10 days from now and that really has to like that's the kind of thing that we so far can't model perfectly and probably won't be able to model perfectly so a little bit bumping up against what's possible but it's really good what we have is pretty great hey guys some breaking news yeah and it's not it's not that the person i call this called back they haven't that's what i thought that was what i was hoping for it's that we've just gotten an email from dr carl vinond uh who writes dear john and hank at the beginning of episode 150 you were wondering about eiffel tower-sized piles of poop and how long they would take to build it seemed solvable so i did solve it uh and then there is a pdf that is only two pages long and it begins if this thing is going to be freestanding droppings just drop on a pile without structural support it will eventually form a cone the volume v of the cone of base radius r and height h can be computed as and then goes on in incredible astonishing detail to explore how long it would take people to make a cone of poop as tall as the eiffel tower and the answer is around 120 000 years well that's that's way longer than i thought yep and that's if every visitor dropped an average human daily defecation worth of poop on the pile every person is in the eiffel tower oh my god oh well that's great news seven million visitors yearly 120 000 years that's wonderful news that's great news i'm so glad i don't know why it's good news it just feels like good news it feels like the world has gotten more interesting because now i know how long it would take the visitors of the eiffel tower to make an eiffel tower of poo yeah and also that it would take a long long time yeah i know probably what is the radius of that cone john because it's probably gonna be probably gonna be wider than it is tall i'm gonna be honest i don't understand a lot of the calculations in this document so i'm not sure i can answer that question okay well we'll put that what up on the patreon for everybody to see probably also tweeted out because it sounds pretty amazing yeah it's pretty great thank you car we appreciate it hey let's get to the all important news from marz and afc Wimbledon don't worry i'll start yeah it seems according to my my phone which tells me afc wibbledon scores now because i have apparently tweeted about it enough uh it's good news we're undefeated we haven't lost all season it's incredible if we continue at this rate we'll have not just the greatest season in afc wibbledon's history but maybe one of the greatest seasons in football history afc wibbledon had a nil niel draw with coven tree that really we should have won there should have been a penalty called in the last minute of the game but also we just had a ton of good opportunities and the way that we were playing was i thought really promising and then in the league cup we were one-nill down to port smith uh in the second half when joe pigot scored a goal to make it a tie i think joe pigot is comfortable with piggy jokes because that's his twitter handle it's like piggy something but okay afc wibbledon fans have taken to saying feed the pig and he will score and indeed it does seem that if you feed joe pigot enough crosses he will score so joe pigot scored made it one-one and then there was an own goal in the eightieth minute my favorite kind of goal and afc wibbledon prevailed two one one-nil down to two one up so that's a pretty great result taken on barns leave this weekend i don't know i'm feeling really optimistic that might come back to haunt me i should never feel optimistic but i am i can't lie i'm excited we're currently sitting ninth in the league one table which i will take that all day long wow that's that's pretty amazing so there are teams who are less who are more undefeated more undefeated than you hope them there eight teams more undefeated than us yes several of which won both of their opening two games but they're just bragging all right general great news keep it up i'm glad that the team is playing as a team and joe joe pigs is getting his his uh his daily allowance as they say what's the news for mars this week well and this for mars is still tense and not great as the dust storm that has been going on for the last month or two months already now uh is finally settling a little bit but opportunity the rover that's been on mars for almost 15 years is uh has not woken up yet so it's been 60 two sixty well when this when this podcast comes out it will have been almost 70 days since uh since opportunity was last heard from and hopefully by the time the podcast comes out we'll hear something but it's starting to feel a little bit like we might not hear something because that's a really long time to go with no power so it's a solar powered rover the basically the dust storm was thick enough that it was nighttime no power was getting to it and the battery may have frozen in that time because one of the things that the that the um solar panels do is actually warm the battery so that doesn't freeze this is this is so they have to give a certain amount of sunlight or the battery can freeze right because it's very cold on mars and then then you can't recharge the battery because then the battery cannot function to wake the rover up so um when opportunity first landed on mars they had a song that they would play in the emission control every morning because everybody was so amped up and excited so the real news from mars is that they have started to do this again to keep more out up in the room because everybody's a little bummed but also but also uh to you know just to try and wake wake the uh wake the rover up so they've actually released a playlist on spotify of some of the songs that they are playing which include wake me up before you go go um the trooper from iron maiden dust in the wind from campus here comes the sun by the beetles it's a door oh man oh that's adorable and oh man i hope it wakes up but even if it doesn't what an accomplishment to have a solar powered battery working for 15 years on mars let alone all the other things that had to work for it to talk to us all those years it's pretty amazing and uh and the team still is holding out hope and they still are sending a little message every day to try and uh try and wake it up and give it a little beep and say can you beep back for us and so far no back beep but um frankly this this mission was like was planned to last 90 days and that would have been considered a success so 15 years on the on the red planet is is wonderful but we will continue to have updates for you here uh dear hankajan if you want to stay updated on how how opportunities doing well thank you for the update from mars and indeed thank you for plotting with me what have we learned today oh gosh well we learned that the eiffel tower of poop is gonna take a while yeah 120 000 years half of human history so far oh man we've got to get more people visiting the eiffel towers what i've learned we've learned that step up too is a really wonderful movie and anybody who doesn't think so is wrong period and of story we've learned that if you got to lean into your enthusiasm and bring people up to where you are not meet them down there and lastly we learned that there is so much music and it is so good john thank you for potting with me as always you can email us your questions and we really appreciate when you do that because it's how we make the podcast you can do that at hankajan at gmail.com i am hankgreen on twitter john is john gree this podcast is edited by the indefitigable nick jankins it's produced by rosion hosrow hosson shared in gibson our head of community and communications is victoria bonger the music that you're listening to right now and at the beginning of the podcast is by gunner rolla thank you again for listening and as they say in our hometown don't forget to be awesome i'm back here at the end of the episode with your final reminder that the pod cam campaign is ending very soon so if you think you can support it in these final hours before it ends whether you can make it to the event or you want to get the 30 dollar digital attendance which will deliver the entire conference to the podcast app of your choice you can go to pod cam.com now or whenever you get home don't do it while you're driving