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Oh, no. Oh, the cap's lock was on. I'm just going to put that on your head there for like maybe like 10 seconds and then tell you that our family's working its way through Lice Outbreak. Your child isn't old enough yet to get Lice, but let me tell you.
You've got it now. Alright. John, yes. One, do you have a thing you were going to do after the thing or you're not going to do the thing?
We decided not to do it. I was going to do a new bit where I say things that I would have tweeted this week. But I told, I don't know if you guys know, but I'm off Twitter. One thing I've learned about being off the social internet over the last month is that it's a little bit like having gone to Harvard in the sense that within 10 to 15 seconds of anyone beginning a conversation with me, I find myself saying, I no longer use the social internet.
You know, like, they'll be like, how's the chicken? And I'll be like, you know, good, but I can't take a picture of it because I'm not on Instagram. I went to college just outside of Boston. It was lovely.
Hey Hank. Should we answer some questions from our listeners? Like, yes. Okay, let's do it.
This first question comes from... They were given to us by the people in this room. So hopefully you're here. Whoever we're about to ask a question from, John didn't have his first one prepared.
That's fine. I had my first one. I'll pick down. But he decided to go first.
So you just keep on looking. Oh, I found it. Our first question comes from Anonymous. And when I read the question, you'll know why they wanted to remain anonymous.
Which one of you beefy lads can lift more? It's not really... More what? Yeah.
Like I need units. I can definitely lift more ideas. I haven't ever tried to lift something I couldn't lift. I look at it and I'm like, that's a jug of milk.
And that's as high as I go. Everything else is like, eh, probably not. Okay, then it's me. I think I may have picked up a two by four at some point in the early 2000s.
Yeah, then I have you by pretty wide margin. Oh, you know what we should do? We should just see who can do more shoulder presses with those chairs. We're just real quick.
Visual gags are good for a podcast. Yeah, visual gags are great for a podcast. We'll all insert some narration here. John intimidated me out of it.
He looked so comfortable doing it. And I was like, my shoulders. He's doing it. For those of you who don't want to do it with one hand now.
Yeah, he looked me straight in the eyes and he said, I could do this for the full 50 minutes of the podcast. And I was like, well, I couldn't. It was an extraordinarily light chair. That's a good laugh.
That one got one. Somebody loved that joke. Dear brothers. Who's it from?
Marily. Hey, Marily. Hi, how are you? I feel ya.
Well, actually I've been doing okay. Last year I made some bad decisions and I realized it and I saved myself from them this year. I'm so glad that you put your name on this question so that now everyone will know. I drink a lot of water.
Because, you know, healthy. Which means I also have to go to the bathroom quite frequently. My good friends know this about me, but it's always weird when I'm with people I don't know so well. Are any of the people around you, folks like that?
Just everyone in the room. Someone know this about Marily. How do I tell this weekend I've been telling people I'm going on a walking tour of Seattle restrooms. But that won't work when I get home, please help Marily.
How do you inform people that you're a frequent peer, John? Someone experienced it without it. I would just be pretty open about it. And if somebody says like that's weird, then they're the ones who made it weird.
Just be like I drink a lot of water because I'm super crazy healthy and you should drink like you should be a frequent peer. What's your problem? You know, throw it back on them. Be like you only pee six times a day?
Good God. Yes. Shame of them. Have you been to a doctor?
Six times a day. No, I don't even know how much I pee. Like, oh now I'm stressed out. Do I pee too much?
Do I pee not enough? It hadn't occurred to me. You mentioned medical something to my brother and he's very worried now. It hadn't occurred to me that it could be something I could feel shame about.
So thanks for opening up that new avenue. I'm really excited to pursue it like in the hour between when I lie down and fall asleep tonight. Has anybody in this room ever gone to the bathroom to say that they could check Twitter? Oh, yeah.
I don't know if you guys know this, but I've actually been off of Twitter for a month. So I can't relate to that at all. When do you pee? You know what I do when I'm urinating now, Hank?
Thanks for that sentence. I think. I have these weird things called the thoughts. And now they're all going to be about, now when was the last time I peed?
Is this the correct color? Yeah. Oh man. All right.
You're fine. Everything is fine. Don't worry. I'm sure that you don't have a disease.
That wasn't your question, but that is my answer. But we're very worried about you now. Yeah. Okay.
This next question comes from Sarah who writes, Yeah. Sarah, I'm definitely concerned about you. Is there more to the question? Yes.
Give me some context. Like, why does the nose need to get it on the action? And that is true. I have found that to be true, but that's not your whole body.
I bet there are at least 50 of me here right now, comma Sarah. Which Sarah are you? Hi. Very good.
Very mild woo. That was about, I thought that was like a 20 on the scale of woo's I've heard, a 20 out of 100. Woo. I didn't, but it didn't seem like an embarrassed woo.
It just seemed like a chill. I'm not sure. I'm sure it's a little bit too. I didn't, but it didn't seem like an embarrassed woo.
It just seemed like a chill woo. You know, like, I'm having a good time. Let's just, yeah. Woo.
Woo. So, Sarah, I'm a science guy. I know all about things like this. For example, you've got eyes and your nose and they cry.
Got eyes up on the inside of your nose. They also cry. Just like your eyes, your eyes cry, your nose eyes cry too. Yeah.
Yeah. Science. You don't usually, yeah, you don't often think about your nose eyes because you don't usually look out of them. Yeah.
They can't see anything. If you focus really hard, Sarah, you can see out of your nose eyes. Like if you just kind of squint it, squint really, then you can see out of your nose eyes, but there's not much to see. Yeah.
So, it's like more hair than you used to have. It's mostly what my nose eyes see these days. Why? Does hair come out of my nostril?
You can't, and it's just like, stop, broing. You're a nose hair. You have phases of growth and you've reached the end of it before you get four inches long. Yeah, I'm very confused about so many things about middle age.
Mostly like why do all of these cliched things keep happening to me? That everybody talks about with middle age? Like why does my knee hurt all the time now? It seems like can't I have a more interesting, less cliched middle age?
Yeah, and I literally see the kids these days, and I'm like, God, kids these days. These days. Yeah. I hope they're all right.
Yeah. You know? I am worried about them and worried by them at the same time. And like the things that I'm very hopeful about today's kids, I think, but mostly I'm just baffled by them.
Like it used to be when young people got into something, I was already kind of into it. You know? So like when young people were like, oh, Harry Potter's amazing. I was like, oh, yeah, I know.
I know. I was reading Harry Potter when you were five. And now young people will be like, oh, have you seen Peekaboo, Smooth, the new app where you can lip sync to electronic music that doesn't have any words? And I'll download it and I'll try to be like, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah.
And I just feel so embarrassed. Yeah. Before I was TikTok when it was musicly, I downloaded it and I was like, well, I have a new media personality. I'm going to engage with this new app.
I downloaded it and I was like, I'm leaving. It's like I just walked into a Claire's as a single 35-year-old man. Like, you can't be here. It's not okay.
No, that's exactly it. You shouldn't be here. And like they're trying to tell you in all kinds of different ways. And you're like, no, I'm cool.
I'm gonna be on Snapchat. And everyone's like, no, man, no, you're not. You shouldn't. And then like after one day I was like, oh, yeah, no, I'm never going back here.
Yeah. Okay. Okay. This next question comes from Kelsey.
Whoop. Maybe. There's several Kelsey. Sorry, I didn't ask your question first.
I'm a permanent wheelchair user. How do I physically propose to my girlfriend since I can't get down on one knee, Kelsey? Are you that Kelsey? You're that Kelsey?
Can you raise your hand? I can't see your hand. Here's my answer to the question. If you've had the conversations, if you've discussed the stuff.
Not right now. Oh, there he goes. If you've discussed the stuff that you need to discuss, if you're ready to get engaged, then like getting down on one knee is not an important part of the process. The important part of the process is the asking.
So I want to, I'm just coming to you Kelsey so that you can participate in the conversation. This is a bigger room than I thought it was. Oh, I've met before. How are you?
Good to see you. Oh, you have your own microphone. Oh, and so you've talked about it. Yes, yes.
Have we talked about it? Yes. Oh, this is your girlfriend. How are you doing?
I'm having a big thing, Jake. That's good to hear. Hi, I'm Hank. Hi, Hank.
I'm Amelia. Hi, Amelia. So I guess John's advice was like if you're ready to do it. Okay.
Are you ready? Yeah. Amelia Mary Zuber. You're my favorite person.
And you're my perfect. Will you marry me? Okay, I'm going to leave you guys alone now. I'm fine.
Oh, jeez. I'm a little teary. Little. Well, that, I mean, that's going to be the best part of the pod.
I thought about saying anybody else looking to get married, but no, you can't. You're not going to be able to beat that. So save it for another podcast. Oh, man.
That was really lovely. Thank you for sharing that moment with us guys. I don't know how you, I know. Yeah, I really appreciate it.
It's encouraging. Makes me go back to the feeling earlier when I feel like we're as a species going to be okay. John, you got a really good follow up for that one. I do.
I do. It comes from anonymous and it is Dear John and Hank Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese. I want to, I want to keep the vibe going of being on the edge of tears and overjoyed. So, I mean, there's, if you make a Dorito and you put salt and sugar and everything else on it, I'm good, man.
You can make it spicy, you can make it limey, you can make it Nacho Cheese, you can make it cool ranch and I will eat it until I vomit. Yeah. The flavor ranchers at Doritos, that's what they call them. They're like the sandwich artists that have flavor ranchers.
Is this like nose eyes or is this a real thing? It's all like a come up with John as far as I can get. It's best I could do the fact that you thought it might even possibly be real as a huge win for me. The flavor ranchers at Doritos are real experts.
They really know what they're doing and I put a lot of my trust and faith in them and I, you know, whatever they're up to, I encourage it. They've never let me down so far. Okay. I'm glad we picked that question.
I feel very emotionally supported by the flavor ranchers. This next question comes from Blaive. Blake, Blaine or Blaive? We'll find out soon.
How long do I have to live in a new city before I can confidently say I do not like it? It says lots of words rhyme with Blaive, which is true. Blaive, are you here? What's your name?
Thanks, it's Blake, everybody. More words rhyme with Blake than with Blaive. Yeah. You see where I'm at though?
Oh, yeah, that's a Blaive, 100%. Maybe a Blair. I'm struggling to find a Blake. I have a very specific answer for this because for the first two years that I lived in Indianapolis, I hated it.
Not like I didn't like living there. I hated it. I could not wait for Saren to get a job at some other museum in some other stupid, mid-sized American city so I could hate that city, but at least it would be a new hate. That's how I felt about Indianapolis.
And now when people say anything negative about Indianapolis, even when they say, you know, Indianapolis dumps raw sewage into the white river 70 or 80 times a year, I'm like, you shut your mouth. You know what? That raw sewage is beautiful in a way. If you think about it long enough.
People are just trying to keep themselves and their children alive. We're just trying to prevent cholera, okay? All we want is to feed ourselves and take care of our children and the consequence of that. One of the many consequences is raw sewage, yes.
And it wouldn't exist if it weren't for human love. More evidence that a hand can make a case for anything. I think you have to be in a place for my experience anyway. It's been the up to be in a place for a couple years before you can start to see its charms and see past its frustrations and annoyances.
In the end, the problem with any kind of moving or travel for me is that I bring myself with me and you know, like, there I still am with all of my old problems and I always think the geographical cure will work and instead I find myself now I'm like, oh great, now it's mountains and me. Now it's a beach and me. Now it's Indianapolis and me. So over the years of living in Indianapolis, I began to hate myself less, which strangely had the side effect of me hating Indianapolis less.
And now I'm a huge fan of it. And if you are considering, if you live in Seattle and are considering perhaps moving to a place where you don't have to pay $700 million for an apartment, let me encourage you to move to Indianapolis. Where ever where ever. The cheapest big city in the world in America.
When you first moved to Indianapolis, I looked at houses and there was a house on the market for like $11,000. Oh yeah. No, the house next door to our first house sold for $89,000. And when it was for sale, I went in to be like, what's wrong with it?
And the answer was nothing. That's why it was $89,000. It's because it's a pretty good house. I'm so sorry, Seattle.
Oh, it's not the easiest time to be you. But you're making it work. In my experience, I don't feel really one way or another about places. I feel ways about people.
And when I'm feeling distressed about a place, it's usually because I've felt antagonized by or my values are not in concert with the people that I come across. And if it is a thing like, there's no good Indian food or this is a very mazula problem. Yeah, the airport is an issue. Do you guys have good Indian food here?
No restaurants are open until after six. Yeah. Or your airport only flies to three different cities. Like there's another mazula problem for you.
But the thing that I love is that I feel like the people in this place have a similar perspective on the world and they help me have a better view of the world. And then when I'm in other places, sometimes I don't feel that way. Sometimes I feel like people don't like each other or have a sort of perspective that we're going to be OK and that people are ultimately good. And that rubs off on me and makes me feel real bad.
And so I do not know. But I also think what your thing that you were disliking is, but it might be the social group rather than the place itself. I also think it's a time of life issue. I lived in Chicago when I was in my 20s and I love Chicago.
It's an amazing city. It's a wonderful city. It's a big huge. It's many cities at the same time.
And there were large swaths of the time that I lived there that I absolutely hated Chicago and it wasn't because of the weather. It was because of circumstance. I was in a difficult period of life. Like being in your, I don't want to generalize.
Like being in your early to mid 20s is essentially the worst. So I think that was the problem I had with Chicago, ultimately. Not for everyone. For some people it's great, but not for me.
We have a related question. Hank, dear John, what do you say when people ask you where you are from? Is it the city where you were born, where you grew up, where you live, where you live now? People at PODCON keep asking me where I'm from.
I don't know. Thanks in advance. Just to get a pick. It's easy for me.
I don't have to pick out of Sarolando because I was there the whole time. You wait. No. When people ask you where you're from today, you say I'm from Orlando.
No, not from. Yes. You're right. I've been in Missoula for the last 15 years.
You still don't say I'm from Missoula? If you live in Montana, you are not from Montana unless you were born in Montana. And they will punch you in bars over it. I don't doubt that.
For me, when I look back at the moment my life, I began to think of myself as an adult without being uncomfortable about the thought, which was shockingly recently, was the moment when when people asked me where I was from, I just said I'm from Indianapolis. And once I felt really comfortable with being from Indianapolis, with the idea of having a hometown that wasn't the town in which I grew up or either of the towns in which I grew up, that's when I felt like, oh, I'm home or at least like I'm making a home in this place. So I think if you're not there yet, like when I was in my early 20s, people would ask me when I was from and I would usually say like Alabama, but also kind of Florida and I guess kind of Chicago. But at PogCon, they mean like, where are you going home after this?
Right? Where do you live currently? Yeah. So that's when you say you're current city.
Yeah. It's funny. I had not thought about this, but when people ask me where I'm from, where are you from? I say I live in Missoula because I don't think I'm from Missoula.
It's weird to have to be from a place at all. It's weird to have a from. It doesn't necessarily seem like there's actually true of humans that we sprouted as a plant and then turned into a butterfly and flew away from the place that you were originally a scientist, gentlemen. He's a gentleman.
He's a real. We are all plant butterflies. But I do think that I'm from Orlando. And I don't know.
Linguistically, I am confused right now. I think, existentially, I've also gotten myself a little confused and maybe also biologically as well. But I am no longer from Orlando. You left sooner than I did.
Hard stop. Thank you for congratulating me, person who clapped. Congratulations for not being Orlando. Orlando is great.
Anybody here from Orlando? Hey, hey, thanks for being here. It's a great city. I'll actually be visiting in a month to take my children to certain unnamed.
Oh, I see. Oh, God. I love theme parks. And I can't wait for my child to be old enough to love them too.
Oh, God. Probably simultaneously coincide with the moment when my knees hurt so bad. But I can no longer enjoy them. Oh, God.
Because I'll be that age. I love Disney. We are so similar in so many ways. And we could not be more different on that front.
Like when we were kids and our parents would take us to Disney, my mom because of her community service was awarded like an annual pass, a free annual pass to Disney. And so it was very easy for them to take us to Disney, which I know sounds like a wonderful blessing and whatever. But it was horrible. It was horrible.
They take us to Disney all the time. We went there hundreds and hundreds of times. We went to Hank, we went on the rides, the whatnot, the Hoosie Hoos. I got a hernia.
I was like, I was 14 or 15. By this time, I wore a trench coat in the summer in Orlando. I hated every aspect of Disney and Orlando and also the known universe. There was nothing about the universe I couldn't find an angle to hate except for Trent Reznor.
He's a talented man. I'm not going to deny it. Not in the cure. God help me.
So what I would do while they went on the rides is there's this thing at Disney called the Hall of Presidents. And it's like a 30 minute animatronic introduction to American civics. It's the best I maintain, the best ride at Disney. It's also air conditioned and there's never a line.
So I would sit in the Hall of Presidents and listen to the 30 minute spiel and then I would get out and then I would go immediately back into the Hall of Presidents because it was air conditioner and I would just do that for eight hours until it was time to go. I have never been to the Hall of Presidents. That's great. So I have been to the emergency room because of my Disney hernia.
It's true. I forgot about your Disney hernia. This next question comes from Mary. That's all we're talking about.
Dear Hank and John, what are your strategies for recovering after a con is over? No. I am. Mary.
Why do we still sing nursery rhymes about all this pastoral? It's very strange. They're all about sheep and hay and pies with birds in them. I'm very confused the whole time.
What should they be about? Like plastic molding factories? You know? No, you know, things that people do now.
Mary had a little... I'm using a profile. Mary had a little town in Minecraft. Yeah.
Mary had a little patreon. It gave everybody eight bucks a month. It's nice. It's better than nothing.
I just thought of a very sad joke that I'm not going to tell. Okay. There's a lot of strategies. But the actual question I forgot, the strategy is for recovering after a con is over.
One, it's a thing and it's normal and it took me forever to accept that I'm going to feel bad the day or two after a con and that's normal. That's almost like in many cases what I need to be told is this is a thing and you are experiencing it and it will not last forever. Yeah. You have to set your expectations correctly because then you don't get freaked out.
I often get sick after VidCon or PodCon and sleep more than usual. And for the first few years, I was like, no, I have to be at work. And now I just take a day off, if I can. And that makes it better.
So that's my advice. Yeah. I think, oh, sorry. That one really snuck up on me.
He's already getting sick. That means I'm going to get sick, because I lent him my hat earlier. And I was trying to give him lice, and he gave me a cold. Maybe I'm allergic to lice.
This next question comes from my think Daniel. Well, we don't know for sure. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Dear John and Hank, I've obtained an unfortunate nickname at work.
It was, which roughly translates to little dude slash little boy. I've been there five months. How do I get this to stop? So I don't really have a solution to your problem, Hank.
But I do have a relevant story that I'm on the fence about telling, because I don't want to have this new nickname outside of my friend group. Because within my friend group, it is such a nickname. So about three months ago, one of my good friends turned 40. I'm excited about it.
And we went to, we had a party in a hotel suite in Indianapolis. And it was a great time. And there was a lot of drinking, and food, and games, and fun. Tiger, and Mike Tyson was there, and then everybody.
Yeah, you've seen the movie. And that's how Indianapolis parties unfold with 40 year olds. Yeah. And then at about 12, 30 in the morning, somebody was like, oh, man, I'm really hungry.
I wish I had some Doritos. And I was like, oh, you guys want snacks? And I should add that I was kind of half conscious at this moment. Like my eyes were closed, and they thought I was asleep.
But I heard somebody say Doritos. And I was like, hello, how's it going, guys? And I was like, you guys want some snacks? And they were like, yeah, we really want some snacks.
And I was like, I'll go get some snacks. And they were like, what? You're asleep. And I'm like, no, it's good.
So I go down to the hotel lobby, and I don't want to brag. But I am really good at late night snack acquisition. You know how some people under order on the snacks? That's never been a problem for me.
So I go downstairs, and it's a situation where there's this hotel pantry where you can get whatever you want. And I get a lot of snacks. I probably get 30, 35 total snacks. But I don't have any bags.
So I just kind of roll it up into my shirt as best I can and kind of hold the rest of it. Yeah, like a baby, basically. But like a baby that's got 35 discrete parts, any of which could fall off at any moment. And I get in the elevator.
Now the elevator is full of eight people who do not know each other, but are all very drunk and have been riding up and down on the elevator for long enough that they've become friends. And they can't figure out how to get to the floor that they all want to get to. This is the environment into which I walk with this 35 different snacks. So I walk in there, and one of the guys says, you got a lot of snacks, man.
And then one of the other people says, he's a snack man. And then these eight strangers start chanting, snack man, snack man, snack, no, no, what did you expect? I should never have done it. Oh, no.
Wow. So I'm like, OK, well, this is really bad, but at least it's just an elevator phenomenon. But no, I get out of the elevator. I'm walking back to the hotel suite where Sarah's birthday party is.
And here's this freakin Greek chorus behind me. And snack man. And I don't know what to do. I'm like, do I knock on a different door and just like hope for the best?
But no, in the end, I knock on the right door. And my friends open up and they're these strangers behind me chanting snack man. And that's how I got that nickname. So I guess the answer to the question is you got to start bringing snacks.
And then you'll be the snack boy instead. You'll be the little snack boy. You'll be the tiny little snack boy. All right.
Glad we got that covered. You want me to ask another one? I got one. I'm sorry.
I was upside down. What is the most helpful and comforting thing I can tell you when you are a patient? I look to John, who needs to be comforted frequently. Well, I mean the most comforting thing that you can tell to me is you're fine and all of these test results will be negative and you'll be home soon.
But you can't, right? That's the scam. That's the deal with medicine. You can't offer the reassurance that they need because sometimes that reassurance is false and you don't want to offer somebody false reassurance.
I think the most important thing that you can do is listen. I find it very helpful when I'm in the hospital. If I ask for something, if somebody is able to get it right away, like a warm blanket, for instance, can be often extremely comforting when you're in the hospital because it feels warm and almost like a cuddle that's closest to the hospital. Can you go down to the x-ray department and get me one of those heavy blanks?
Oh, those are great. Just a big metal metal. Just for whatever part you can find. Just put it on my arm.
I just want to feel cuddled. I just want to feel the weight. And then the other thing is just to be respectful. Be respectful of the fact that it's super hard on a minute by minute basis when you work in health care to be empathetic toward patients because there are a lot of them and the expect patients on you are extraordinarily high and you are also experiencing your own set of stresses.
But when you are able to be empathetic toward patients and to understand that for them, this is, in many cases, the worst day of their lives or at the very least, the worst day of their week, I think that can be really helpful. Now I know you can't be expected to hold and you shouldn't try to hold other people's anxiety and fear and worry and sadness and everything because that would make it impossible for you to do your job. And that balance is something that frankly I could never find when I worked in a hospital and I have great admiration for the people who are able to do that work for longer than like six months because I burned out almost immediately. Thanks for doing good work.
Yeah, thank you. This next question comes from Miranda who writes, do you John and Hank, last year you advised me to just get a second cat or else dump my live in boyfriend? Did we do that? That does not seem like advice that we would give.
I feel like it seems dubious. Seems like maybe it was more nuanced than that. This year, maybe there were some really good reasons why you needed another cat. This year, this year, we have two cats.
It worked. Okay, never mind. We did great. Yeah, you're welcome for the great advice.
Now we're getting married. How do I convince him to start having kids? No, no, no. I feel not great about the fact that I'm responsible for this one cat.
I do not want to get into the business of being responsible for other people's babies. John, can I put you on pause right now? And make a suggestion? Snacks?
I mean, if you provide enough snacks for people, they're very amenable to them. Especially to read-os. Okay, no, here's my argument. This should be a conversation that happens between equals about a very long-term decision.
Get them hooked on the snacks and you say, I'm going to take them away if you don't have a baby. And that's not weird at all. Yeah, that is very bad advice. I mean, we're here for.
You both need to really 100% be on the same page about that. It's such a huge decision. I actually remember at our Catholic Engaged Encounter, which I've probably mentioned before, because it was the most terrifying two days of my life. Do you know I haven't been on the social internet at all in like six weeks?
One of the things they made us do was stand back to back and then raise our hands if we wanted kids. And so Sarah and I stood back and said, do you want kids? And we raised our hands and we turned around and we were like, oh yeah, good. And half the other couples turned around and huge fights broke out.
So don't be in that situation. Get this. Have the conversation. Get it settled.
Yeah. All you have to have a conversation. This is a thing that involves more than one person and mustens. So the opinions of both those people must be taken into account.
It might even involve more than two people. It's possible. That's up to you though. I have no interest.
We're laying out of it. You do what you do. The only person who doesn't have a saying is the one who starts existing them. Yeah.
That's upsetting to me. You know what I know? No one asked me if I wanted to exist. All this reminds me that today's podcast is brought to you by Miranda's second cat.
Miranda's second cat. Apparently my fault. This podcast is also brought to you by my Disney hernia. My Disney hernia.
A very fun day came to an end. Today's podcast is also brought to you by the Hall of Presidents. The Hall of Presidents. Disney's leading civics oriented attraction.
And finally, this podcast is brought to you by marriage proposals in public. Hey. I hope that you asked first. This episode of Dear Hank and John's Brandt View by Shopify.
There are a lot of things that stand between I have an idea and this is an idea that actually exists in the world and people are buying things from me. And that is what Shopify makes easier. When you start with Shopify, the tools, to design and launch and take payments, they're all there from day one. You don't have to build a whole machine before you can start building the business.
And this is important because you also have to look good and with Shopify's templates, you could get a site set up really quick that looks credible and professional without needing to code or duct tape a bunch of different tools together. And when things look real, that works on my brain to be like, I'm doing a real thing. It also works on other people's brains to be like, this is legitimate. Shopify also has one of the best checkout systems on the internet.
It's built to help customers finish the purchase effectively and efficiently without a bunch of roadblocks. Returning customers can check out with a single click. That means less friction and fewer abandoned carts and a smoother experience for everybody. That stuff gives you confidence early on and it gives other people confidence in what you're doing.
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When you build a Shopify, you're building with tools that already work at every scale. All you need is the idea, Shopify handles the rest. You can start your free trial at Shopify.com slash Dear Hank. Start your free trial at Shopify.com slash Dear Hank with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27th, 2026.
See you website for more details. One thing I love about summer is how easy everything feels. The days are a little more relaxed. My kids don't have to wake up at five in the morning and I find myself reaching for the same comfortable go anywhere pieces again and again which is why I keep coming back to quince.
I often wear either a long sleeve or a short sleeve button down from quince and it fits well and I never have any complaints. In fact, sometimes I get compliments about it. I was at the airport a couple days ago. I often find myself in airports and someone said I like your shirt and I said thanks.
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Now available in Canada too, that's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash Dear Hank for free shipping and 365 day returns, quince.com slash Dear Hank. This episode of Dear Hank and John is brought to you by Factim. Imagine for a moment that you are absolutely immersed in some work where you're creating something beautiful or useful or useless and ugly but you love it anyway and you look up and suddenly you have a feeling and that feeling is that it is 2.30 p.m. and that you did not eat lunch.
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Can I do this one? Yes, please. It says, dear Mr. Greens, last summer I fell in love with someone who eventually left me for someone else.
Then last week, the someone else matched with me on a dating app. And then asked me to hang out. What do I do? Do I cause chaos?
From Fumble on the Bumble. I mean, this is a vintage example of how happy I am to be old in 2018. It's 2019. That's how old I am.
I'm now of an age where I don't need to know the year. The nurse will be like, who's the president? You're like, I don't know. I haven't been on Twitter in 30 years, lady.
How am I going to know who the president is? How do people know things anymore? Do you cause chaos? People seem to be very in favor.
Yeah, people, I was shocked. I was shocked. Is there anyone who is for letting sleeping dogs lie? Okay.
Raise your hand if you've done this before. No one has done this before. Oh, I've done it before. They're sitting next to each other.
Wait, are you, did this result in YouTube being okay? They're like, nope, nope, nope, nope. I mean, obviously it's a bad situation. I mean, the truth, the truth of the match.
Is it a, you don't have to do anything. It's not a bad situation because you don't have to do anything because you don't have to have a text from what I understand. If somebody texts you on a dating app, you are under no obligation to write to them back. That question, why did they match with them?
They only matched with them because they saw their profile and they knowingly swiped either up down left or right depending on what how it works. Yeah, I suppose you did. You did swipe the someone else. Yeah, I belong to Bumble.
You can remain anonymous if you want. But did you swipe the someone else? I did. You did.
Why did you swipe the someone else? Oh, she wanted to feel better. Yeah, no, that makes sense actually. Now that you say it out loud, I totally would have done that.
Yeah. Hundopee. I'm so cool and hip. I mean, that was the, that made like my whole body shiver when you said that.
Like when I said what, John? Hundopee. My, my, my, I, I feel like I have a fever that came on very quickly as a result of Hundopee. The more I think about this, the more I think you probably got to cause chaos and see.
And here's the reason. You got to see how weird it can. I want to preface this by saying the end of the story really should not be you getting back together with the person who left you for the person who's now on the dating app who swiped you. I don't think that's a good ending of the story.
I'm not an expert. You feel like you'll feel differently if you live your life, obviously, but like I don't think that's the best outcome here. But if you hang out, see where, see what happens, the story likely gets better, you know? Like, I don't know which way it gets better yet, but like if, if part of the point of being reasonably young is to have great stories, now's a great time in your life to have such a story.
And this is a pretty amazing opportunity. Thank you. Yes. Thank you for potting with me.
Thanks to all of you for listening, not just today, but for listening to our podcast and bringing so much joy to it, the responses that you send in, the gifts that we get. It really, it has made me feel like 2010 Nerdfighteria again, and it's been really magical. And long may it continue, thank you for sticking with us. I know there are many people in the audience who've been following our stuff and making stuff with us for a long time.