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Tickets go on sale to the general public June 30th at somethingworthknowing.com. So come build a better world with us on September 16th and experience something worth knowing you can get your ticket at Complexly.info slash something. And welcome to Dear Hank and John. What does that prefer to think of the Dear John and Hank?
It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions, give you a few advice and bring you all the weeks news from both Mars, the planet, and they actually Wimbledon the soccer team. John, your birthday is coming up or it just happened as the people who are listening and I've got your present. It's a cup of dirt. Oh, thank you so much.
Why is it a cup of dirt? Well, I just figured you'd appreciate the sediment. Okay. Is dirt sediment?
Yeah. Okay. I feel like it's well, you're the science. It's not a little less COVID.
Yeah, I can tell. I'm not testing positive for anything. I just don't feel great. So that's a good one.
Yeah, yeah. I remember that. It took me quite a while to feel sort of back to normal. Yeah, ish.
Whatever normal is. Right. I think I'd back to normal now. Yeah.
And it's a challenge. So what John, where I know, because I share a YouTube channel account with you, but what were your favorite YouTube finds of COVID? Was it that weird medieval history one? Because you weren't hard on it.
I have been watching a lot of YouTube. Like Sarah watched like proper television and I was like, I'm not watching proper television. I'm not getting out of bed. I can't get out of bed.
There's just no way. I mean, you can make fun all you want of my YouTube watching, but I see your shorts watching, which is way worse than my YouTube. I didn't get really, I don't get to choose medieval history. It was was really big.
I did a lot of like two hour long medieval history. And then the other thing, which was a big discovery for me is one of your favorite YouTube channels, Technology Connections. It's very good. Super enjoyable and really like changes your daily life, because now when I feel the dishwasher, I think about that process differently.
Yeah, you understand all of the thought and work that's gone into doing the things and making the things that exist. It's wild. How much there is. It is also radically deepened my appreciation for the drip coffee maker, the much-m aligned drip coffee maker.
Now that I understand it, is really a wonder of engineering. And when I drink my awesome coffee available at awesomecoffeeclub.com, use the promo code Dear John for three cents off your first order. When I drink my awesome coffee every morning, I'm like, this is great. This is incredible what Mr.
Coffee and its clones have given us. You've also watched a lot of soccer videos, a lot of F1 videos. And a video called Weezer Cruise. Oh, I was actually about the history of the Weezer Cruise.
You know, I'm fascinated by affinity cruises for people who share love. Yeah, I don't know affinity cruise. Yeah, I don't want- There's one for the moody blues called the moody cruise. So good.
I mean, that's the kind of thing where if you're the moody blues and you're kind of semi-retired or whatever, and somebody comes to you and you're like, I don't really want to do it, but the quality of the rhyme is so good. But you made a great bun so I have to. Yeah. And then I listened to a lot of, I kind of was like background watching a lot because I was so miserable.
I couldn't really stare at a screen. So that meant a lot of sort of like podcast-y, but video things like about history mostly. Just as a way to try to get my, I mean, I was just trying to get my brain engaged. I don't know.
It was- Or just give it something to do, you know? So how did Weezer Cruise go? Was it all right? Yeah.
I mean, that was a weird thing. I watched this like 16 minute video and the main subject of it was it was like trying to make fun of Weezer. But the main subject of the video was like Weezer did like eight concerts in four days and they really took good care of their fans. Nerds.
He's like, it was pretty good. I don't know much about Weezer. I've only heard one of their songs. So I don't have an opinion.
I don't know what the current situation with Weezer is like, but from that video, which was trying to make fun of Weezer, my main takeaway was seems like they were pretty nice. It seems like a successful cruise. I wish I was there. I don't care what about Weezer.
Yeah, it was a pretty fun like five day trip. Well, I just had a wild idea. This is not for someone. I can't handle the idea of a Nerd fighter cruise not because I can't handle the idea of a cruise, but mostly because I can't handle the idea of a cruise of a cruise.
Yeah. So here's what you do. Yeah. You listener, not you.
Okay. You go on an affinity cruise for a thing that you've never heard. Yes. Like a lot of you have never heard of the Moody Blues.
I guarantee there's a bunch of people out there unaware of the Moody Blues. Go on the Moody cruise or whatever. What happened? Go on the affinity cruise and just see just like ethnography.
Just be like, what am I? What am I in the midst of? And at the end, are you a fan of the Moody Blues? Because I think 99% chance you are a lifetime fan of the Moody Blues.
Right. I would argue that really you should only go on affinity cruises precisely to find something new to love and people to connect to. Well, the other crew stuff is already there. You still get to do the cruise stuff.
Right. There's still a water feature. But I also think you shouldn't go on an affinity cruise for a thing you haven't affinity for. You got to pick something and just like you are going to dive head first.
Like this is like immersion language learning. But for the Moody Blues, you're going to know so much. So much Moody. What if like Moody Blues fans are huge gatekeepers and you get there and they're like, oh, you've only heard I can't name a Moody Blues song.
You've only heard the sweater song. You suck. We hate you. And then you're just sort of outcast for five days like you're shunned by Moody Blues enthusiasts.
This is the thing I think almost I think I think there's no chance that there's an affinity cruise out there that one will not just assume that you're in. Like they will just assume they're like quiz you. They'll assume you're in and you just be in. You got maybe like do a little studying beforehand.
But but but and second. No, no, I think you have to be radically honest. I think when people are like, hey, what was your first thing? They will be so happy.
The thing Hank is that they'll bring you in. You'll be the most popular person on the cruise. The hardest core Moody Blues fans aren't gatekeepers because they're confident. They're confident in their fandom.
They don't have to tell you you're not a real AFC Wimbledon fan if you didn't go to a game in 1986 because they know in their hearts that they are Moody Blues fans. And so there's no there's nothing else to it. And that is what's so beautiful about the idea of an affinity cruise. Imagine going on the Moody cruise.
And you're like, this will be such a good YouTube video next to a bald haired man with long hair. You know what I mean? He's got the horseshoe of his long hair. And he looks at you and he's like, Hey man, when was your first Moody Blues concert?
And you're like, it's about to happen. He's gonna be so psyched. He's gonna be like, Oh yes. Hell yes.
I have decided that whatever you're into is what I'm into with some women. I this is the best idea we've ever had. Which I'm which I absolutely will not do and do not want to do. But I really want to watch the YouTube video of the person going on something like it doesn't have to be the Moody cruise but something like that where they just have no idea what it is.
And you're just gonna be immersed in the culture. I want to do it straight ethnography as long as you're like open and accepting about it. I want to do it so bad. These people will be so mad.
All right, John Zant, John's doing it. He hates cruises, but he's gonna do it. All right, hold on. I will pay you money.
All right, I'm really struggling here to find a list of a few cruises. Yeah, especially because there's a cruise company in New Zealand called Affinity Cruises. That is hurting me. What would you call Affinity Cruises if not?
No, did you just make that up? I did. I did. I got to grab invented a genre.
Yeah. themed cruises. This is just Royal Caribbean. All right, it's like country music jam rock.
Star Trek the cruise. Oh, John doesn't care very much about Star Trek. I really want him to. All right.
Star Trek the cruise. I'm not going on the biker cruise. I'll tell you that. Okay, here's the 65 best themed cruises.
All right. Chris Jericho's rock and wrestling rager at sea. I'm gonna pass on that. I'm gonna pass on the rest of the cruises.
Okay. Meow meow meow cruise for cat lovers. I feel like that's too broad. Too broad.
Yeah. Yep. Yep. Star Trek the cruise is on the list.
The kiss cruise. The kiss cruise. The kiss cruise number nine. Happening.
It's been doing it for nine times. Imagine being the only person who's at their first kiss cruise. Wait, what are their names? They're the guys with the paint, right?
Well, I thought they were the guys with the paint, but I'm looking at a picture of them now and they're not wearing painted faces at the kiss cruise. Maybe maybe that's the right call. Yeah, that's just we're all ourselves here. This is where we're going to be ourselves.
We're not going to have our face painting melting off in the Caribbean Sun. Right. Right. I think there's also the ultimate disco cruise.
Yeah. That's to me. That's too broad. I don't want.
Well, specifically it's cool in the gang. The sister sledge. Billi Ocean. Those are the headlines.
I almost don't want it to be music. Like there's a professional wrestling. It is, John. Oh, there's a there's a knitting cruise.
There's a golden girl's cruise. There's a golden cruise for golden girl enthusiasts where there are three women who cosplay as the golden girls. That's the whole thing. And that's that's enough for a cruise.
It's all golden girls all the time. It's the golden girls cruise. John, you would be the most popular person on the golden girls. There's no doubt in my mind.
I could finally feel famous. I'll make back in 2023. I will pay you. I mean, here's what I'll say.
Hank, we're going to crowd fund it. I can afford to pay my way onto the golden girls cruise. That's like, and also I don't. I'm not somebody who gets excited about getting paid.
I mean, you have to pay me so much money to go into girls cruise for it to be like worth it for my perspective. Yeah. But, oh, there's the parts from Miami, the fictional home of Blanche Devereaux. That's very specific.
They're used to being a NASCAR to cruise, but they stop doing it during COVID. All right. I think this has gone on too long because my first thought about this bit. But, I think the ones I want to keep on the list are Star Trek and Golden Girls.
Oh, my gosh. Yes. I sorry, John. If I wasn't paying attention to you, I was reading all about golden fans at sea, which is the name of the golden girls.
Wow. Anyway, it's up to you. You get to decide. And now we're going to answer some questions for our listeners because it's been a little bit of time that we started for this thing.
All right. Our first question comes from Kallista who writes, how often does the moon go around the earth in a day? I tried to look it up and just got confused. Most people I ask say once a day, but you could tell me twice a day and I would have no choice but to believe you confused, Kallista.
On the earth. Wow. Yes, you go. That the moon goes around the earth.
Yes. Once every lunar month. That's right. Oh, thank God.
I was not positive. Which is not the exact same as a month, unfortunately. The moon doesn't care about the year. The moon doesn't care about the day.
Indeed. The moon does not know about the year. That's true. But I just mean that there's no there's no connection between the length of the day and the length of the lunar month.
Right. In the same way that we don't in the same way that we don't contextualize the movement of the sun around the center of the Milky Way very often. Right. Exactly.
But we it feels like maybe there should be some relationship between the number of days in a year and the year that we think like there's 365 of these in a year. But there there isn't there's 365 point number number number number number number out to infinity and that number changes, which is wild. Yeah. But also, well, it changes very slightly.
Yes. But but it's changed a lot. Right. Over the course of time, like the day used to be hours shorter and in millions of years from now, we'll have 25 hour day.
It's weird. It's weird. It's very weird. But then the oceans will boil and that will be even weirder.
So that's way further. Yeah. But I mean, like if we're talking in long time scales, what do you think the chances are that there will be a human around to witness the 25 hour day? Well, what I can say for sure, John, is that the earth will still be turning.
I don't I mean, we don't know. We don't know that. We definitely don't know that. It is a million years long time.
I don't know what kind of what kind of shenanigans we'll get up to trying to slow up or speed down the earth. But I do think that we will have a hard time affecting it. It's not that we won't try. It's just that we aren't big enough.
I mean, there are well, there actually are people who want to do that to Venus. They want to speed up Venus because it rotates very slowly. And so if you like hit a bunch of like ice asteroids into Venus in like the same direction, you could theoretically speed it up. Yeah, just start just getting spinning.
Once it's spinning, it'll stay spinning. I know about that from science. That's true. All right.
Well, that's the situation. So it's so it's every 20. But it looks like it goes around us once a day because we spin once a day and it stays in the same place while we spin. It doesn't stay exactly in the same place.
So so it indeed, it actually very it's very slightly different. I think it's I don't actually know which way it is. I think it's slightly longer because it's moving in the sky while we are spinning. But this is but this gets to something that's quite interesting, which is the way that lots of people measure time is by the moon, not by the sun.
There is no reason why we have to have a solar year instead of a lunar year and other calendars, lots of other human calendars, including the Islamic calendar use lunar years, which is why, for instance, the month of Ramadan, the month of fasting in Islam, the month of Ramadan moves around the seasons because it's a solar calendar, not a solar calendar. Oh, well, that's awesome. Well, it's I did not know. Yeah, very well.
Now we both learned something. I've learned that my guess was right. And you've learned that Ramadan is sometimes in winter and sometimes in summer. And also whether of course it's in winter or summer depends on whether you're in the northern or southern hemisphere, which is something that northern hemisphere people often forget.
There's a whole hemisphere down there. I mean, in fairness to northern hemisphere people, we're most of us. Every time somebody in Australia is like, it's so cold in July, I'm like, huh? What's it like down there?
It is legit weird that 90 90% of people live on the top half of the planet. Well, there's more land. There's more land up here. Yeah, that's the thing.
There's more land up here. And even the phrase, there's more land up here, right, implies that the northern hemisphere is above the southern hemisphere, which it's not in any kind of real way. Yes, but there has to be you have to have a representation of the earth and something has to be on top and people who are like, it's arbitrary. I'm like, is it or are 90% of us up here?
Yeah. Like if you were going to do it one of the two ways, which you have to do, this makes sense. Indeed, in Penguin Maps, the southern hemisphere is always above I've noticed. Yes, because it's because all the 100% of the penguins live in the southern hemisphere.
No, yes, no, they've never crossed. They can't get out there. I get too hot for us off. Hank, I know for a fact you're wrong because I've seen the penguins in Indianapolis.
Second, I know you're wrong because I've seen the movie Penguins of Madagascar, where there are penguins in Venice, where they're penguins all over the dang place. Oh, you're right. There are a number of penguins that don't cross, but you're right. You're right.
Hank, I would think that as the science one, you would be above such. Oh, no, no, no. Inaccurate. I was wrong.
Anti-biology statements. Yeah, but John, you're the penguin expert. You've watched that penguins in Madagascar movie like eight million times. So I'm so glad that you caught me.
You're correct. That watching the film has been discovered. You're definitely correct at watching the film Penguins of Madagascar makes you an expert in the field of penguins. I basically have a PhD in penguinology.
John, do you know who Tom McGrath is? Donald thinks so. Well, and he can't be a bad man as an expert because he's a skipper and penguins in Madagascar. Thanks to Madagascar was one of the last great animated movies where all the characters were not played by like fancy actors.
They were just played by people. I know John Malkovich plays Dave. Yeah. I got that.
That was a good one. An amazing phone call. The phone call where John Malkovich's agents pitched him the villain in the forthcoming DreamWorks animation movie Penguins of Madagascar. And John Malkovich was like, uh, I mean, I'll probably do it.
And then they're like, you have to do it. Turner Herzog is doing a cameo in the first five minutes and he would have been like, oh, yeah, no, then we're good. I'll do it. Oh, man.
God, what I, but who are we kidding? I mean, I would, there's literally nothing I wouldn't do for money. Oh, I would, I would be in a DreamWorks pick so fast. Oh my God.
You wouldn't even have to pay me. Oh, God. For me to be in Penguins of Madagascar too, like, segment him. I'm going to support the union.
Yeah. Right. Yeah. segment him.
Well, this next question comes from Ainsley who asks during and John. There's a, it's for him and there's a moth slamming itself again and again across my kitchen ceiling. So guys going out with reckless abandon and their dustiness makes the impact shockingly loud. I'm not sure what their dustiness has to do that.
But Ainsley wants to know, is this moth okay? Does he have a sense of pain? Are bugs all right? This is a level one emergency Ainsley.
No, the moth is not okay. The moth is stuck inside. Yeah. Well, not only that, but like the moth is never okay, right?
Like from the time that the moth becomes a moth, life is brief and full of danger. It's true. So. Moth is never okay.
Especially when my cat is around, my cat will eat a dozen moths. There you go. In like four minutes. Yeah.
He is remarkably efficient moth either. Yeah. But yeah, the moth is the moth is the moth is if the moth is never okay, does that mean I'm never okay? Correct.
Oh, so moving on, we have this question from Justin. Devoking it a bunch of research on like insect injury, which does happen. They can't. Apparently what we have, we have determined through science that insects can get brain injuries.
Probably the moth is not getting itself a brain injury though because it's doing this on its own. It's doing it. I would assume in the safer way. And as for whether insects feel pain, they feel something when their bodies are injured.
And we don't know what that is because we've never been an insect, but they feel something and that makes scientists call that thing pain when they're talking about it. Though probably not when they're talking about it in scientific papers. But it's hard to not call that pain. It's when there's like a clear nervous signal being sent because of injury.
So the moth is never okay. Great. Rescue the moth or feed it to your cat. Yeah, try to get the moth outside so that it can be not okay and it's preferred environment.
Just next bunch of guns from Kaylee, it's do your job and take out work at a paint store. How do I not cry every time a customer is awfully rude to me for no reason? I get that maybe they're having a bad day, but then they're mean to me and make me have a bad day and I'm just a humble paint store employee, not selling a cry like paint. Kaylee.
I had I was at the DMV recently and there was a woman who was being mean and all the people at the DMV were visibly distressed about this. Like there was no one in the building who was not having a like aware of and experiencing a negative emotion. And then the woman like like very nearly fell to her knees crying and and then everything changed in a very different direction. And it was just clear that like this person didn't know which emotion to have and had it was in a situation that she did not know what to do about.
Now at the paint store, that seems a little less likely than at the DMV where like maybe you do need this thing in order to get a lot of your like normal life done. But the way that I saw them respond in that moment made me feel really good about the people at the DMV. And they they you know they were they all started like everybody became human again. And that I think is that I think is a thing that is missing.
Yeah. In the way that people seems like more now than ever are treating the folks who are paid to help them out. It does seem like more now than ever. And I don't mean that in like an old man yells a cloud kind of way.
I mean it in a when I talk to people whose jobs involve interacting with customers, it seems to them like more now than ever. And I think that may speak to a shared underlying level of fear and anxiety and discomfort that that expresses itself that way. But when you are experiencing that, when someone is yelling at you about paint and you're like, I work at the paint store, I am doing my best. And I am adhering to our regulations as a paint store.
It's very very difficult not to let that negatively impact your day. And honestly, Kaylee, I would cry. I would just start crying and be like, well, there you did it. You got it.
You got is that what you wanted? Did you want to have to realize I'm a person? Because now you have to deal with that. I guess.
But it's so hard. I mean, I remember the terrible situation to be in. It just how are and it makes so much sense that people like fewer and fewer people are choosing those kinds of jobs. And like they're really, really hard jobs.
They usually don't pay very well. And they can choose them. And people are if people aren't nice to you, then like, yeah, I mean, I sometimes found it helpful when I was in those situations to think of the person who was yelling at me as being very afraid, very like feeling that they were going to lose something that was important to them or have something taken away that was important to them. They're going to lose a client.
They're going to whatever. They're going to get sick. Like, that's what I would tell myself. But it's very hard because the truth is like, that's a lot of times that's certainly not why they think they're angry, you know?
Yeah. What did Ryan Reynolds tell us about conflict resolution? He said that you have to say, you have to like tell them what they just said to you back. Yeah, you just repeat it back.
So, this really is like a cheat code in life. It's ever since Ryan Reynolds told us about it. I use it all the time. It works really well on our own.
It's incredibly effective. Not just it's like incredibly effective with kids with everybody. It's also but it also lets me know for sure whether I'm actually understanding the problem. Exactly.
So if you like, it's actually useful for me as well. So if you repeat it back and you say, so your concern is that you bought oil paint and you needed acrylic paint. Is that correct? Or do I have it?
And they're like, yeah. And then you say, is there more? Is there, you know, is there something else? Or do I have all of it?
And they're like, you have all of it? And then once you really understand it, and you then if you can try to empathize and say, oh wow, like, if I thought that I was buying acrylic paint and I bought oil paint, like I would definitely be frustrated and I absolutely understand why you're frustrated. What can I do to help? Because I didn't buy the wrong kind of paint.
That's a you problem. But you don't say that far out loud. Yeah, you probably don't say that far out loud. Yeah, I mean, validate and empathize, I think.
But that's what it does. But you also, you also need to be able to go to your favorite podcasters or your second favorite podcasters, Kaylee. I don't want to, I don't want to make guesses for you. You also need to be able to go to your favorite podcasters and say, like, this sucks and it makes me cry.
Like, I have that feeling validated because it does very weird to have people just be mean to you in life. Yeah, like it doesn't happen all that often. And for good reason, because like, we're people and we, we, we in general are made uncomfortable by that. And so we don't, we know what it's like to have to do that to us.
And so we don't do it. And it just, it's so frustrating. If you're a normal person, when you do do it, you think about it, like it haunts you. I'll give you an example.
We got off a plane flying to Hawaii. And everybody in the airport line was pretty mean. It was pretty unpleasant experience. I was really tired.
And then the car wasn't like the car that we'd like hired wasn't already there. Yeah. And we called them and they're like, oh yeah, he's on his way. I was like 10 minutes out.
And then like 10 minutes later, we called him again. And I was super, super frustrated not being my best self really, really not being my best self. Yeah. Finally, a guy comes and I'm like huffing and puffing and annoyed.
I'm not like yelling at anybody or making anybody cry, hopefully. But like, I'm clearly annoyed. And the guy's like, oh, I'm really sorry. Like I had this really challenging client who like changed the delivery place on me twice.
And I feel really bad because I'm such a huge fan. And I was like, oh no, he heard me huffing and puffing. And he didn't do anything wrong. He's just trying to do his job.
It's a, yeah, it's a world that is like, yeah, I mean, I just, I have to remind myself whenever I can how convenient things are when they're in convenience, like being frustrated about that. And that's another thing that like it feels like like a thing just changed where people expected a level of convenience that that became less available. It's so true. And it's just such a silly thing to expect that level of convenience, especially during a pandemic.
And then and then also especially during economic downturn or like supply chain disruptions, it's a complicated world that's gonna have inconveniences. That's so true. It's wish that there was like some like public service announcement on TV. This is like, everything's gonna be a little harder right now.
And also like everything's gonna be a little hard forever because you're a mom humans involve humans and you're a mom and like, you're a mammal. Never okay. Yeah, exactly. It's you're never okay.
And nobody you're ever talking to is ever all the way. Okay, because we're not machines. Kaylee is not a paint machine. Kaylee is a person.
And that I think might be part of the issue. We need to like understand the extent to which humans participate in all of our systems, even the ones that work hard to make the human invisible. Which reminds me, John, that this podcast is brought to you by the moth. The moth.
It is never okay. Today's podcast is also brought to you by John Malkovich's agent. John Malkovich's agent. Make an awkward phone calls to John Malkovich since 1978.
The podcast is also brought to you by Golden Fans at Sea. If you want to get your tickets to Golden Fans at Sea, it's 2023 and John might be there. And today's podcast is brought to you by the Lunar Year. The Lunar Year.
It's just another kind of year. It's just another kind of year. We also have a project for Awesome Message from Asher to Isabelle. Today's podcast is also brought to you by the concept of cooler younger sisters who among other things can always be relied upon when you need a second person for a bit.
For example, the world's best or worst dad joke first aired in 1959 to be said at the end of any explanation. And that's our plan of attack. It looks like a nail. Nope, it's attack.
All right, we did it, Asher and Isabelle. Asher gave us lines. I love it. If you're in a project for Awesome Message in the 2023 project for Awesome and you don't give us lines now, you're underperforming.
No, don't feel obligated to give us lines, but we are always happy to have lines when they are given. Yeah, that's good. This episode of Dear Hank and John is brought to you by Shopify. There are a lot of things that stand between I Have an Idea and this is an idea that actually exists in the world and people are buying things from me.
And that is what Shopify makes easier. When you start with Shopify, the tools to design and launch and take payments, they're all there from day one. You don't have to build a whole machine before you can start building the business. And this is important because you also have to look good and with Shopify's templates, you could get a site set up really quick that looks credible and professional without needing to code or duct tape a bunch of different tools together.
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Alright Hank before we get the important news from ours and I have seen one of them let's answer a couple more questions beginning with this one from Emily. Deer John and Hank wins the last time you had a good cry. Lushing and blubbering Emily. Oh gosh well I have I definitely know the answer to this question.
What was it for you? Well my friend died last week and so that was several times but we went to his memorial this weekend and everybody had a good cry. There was lots of big good cries. Yeah I'm really sorry for your loss and for Missoula's loss.
It was the mayor of Missoula Montana for the last 15 years and just a deeply beloved figure who really personified public service. I just like you know obviously nobody's perfect or anything but the way that he handled being one of the speakers referred to him as a street mayor that he was always somewhere near behind and he was always talking to people and I just think that I was so much to learn from leaders who don't make splashes you know who aren't like out there a big like being talked about all the time but are just doing the work and so it was very touching to hear from all of his colleagues and friends and also it had been a long time since I've been to any kind of service and I'm in a different stage of my life now than I was the last time I went to a funeral or a memorial and it felt different as a person who was solidly middle aged now. Yeah well and his death is much closer to the death of a peer than it is to the death of a pair or a grand pair. Yes always previous but yes it's very true.
Previous funerals had been from people who were well and in very different generations from me and very different life stages whereas John was 58 and like in the middle of his career in any way. Right right yeah. Oh yeah well I'm sorry for me it's been a while because the medication I take now makes me not cry as much but it was during the Turtles All The Way Down movie. The last night of the Turtles All The Way Down movie like ended at 5 a.m.
and coming home from that I had a nice long cry. Nice. Well I got another question John. Yeah and a very different vein from Connor who asks during John what is the animal version of the word humanity?
Do we just add itty to the end of the animal name? Yes like penguinity. Ping-wingity doggity, telecanity, telecanity works, doggity does it. Is this supposed to work?
Humkinity and penguinity, Connor. So usually my understanding is that it's got to be I-T-Y or I-T-E right? I think that the answer is right there and you're just not there yet. Is it animal?
No because it's you got to have like a collective animal all dogs together. No that's the dogs individual not all animals just dogs what is there so like their version of humanity so like we have humanity all people together right all dogs together you're not gonna it's not like a pack that's a small group of dogs right we're not all dogs it's dog kind oh right human kind we used to say mankind all the time in English yeah we really did yeah and then I remember like the first time I read humankind I think it might have been um like later Kurt Vonnegut and I was like what human kind human kind but of course like that is a far far better term for human time yeah it sounded weird but it was correct and now it doesn't sound weird anymore can you believe it it's amazing how that happens with language over and over and over again and every single time it happens and people act and it won't happen yeah and boy it's going to be people are gonna hate it if the end of everything I can't believe and if I accidentally say mankind they're gonna string me up and my career will be over no let's be like oh that's probably better if you say human kind yeah dog kind animal kind but I think the kind of but I think the kind of Kennedy is fine I think if it ends in an an like human yeah or an an at all yeah maybe like uh what's his and I mean like there's like the the bird or Ren I wouldn't say Rennedy to describe Ren's no you're right but and I wouldn't say chicken and I would say chickenity chickenity or I might say chicken kind chicken kind but I would say raccoon and oh there's nothing I mean raccoon andity is the way that raccoons refer themselves hey can I tell you an incredible a raccoon and he also sounds like what they get up to can I tell you an incredible story of raccoon and he incredible I can't believe we've saved it for the end of the pod oh I can't believe we just invented Raccoonanity so Sarah had like an outdoor sink and grill and the other day Sarah came inside and she was like why did you leave the sink on all night and I said I didn't and she said yes you did it's on and I was like I definitely didn't because I have covid and so I wasn't outside like I think I have the ultimate defense I was not out and went somewhere it's not outdoors yesterday and Sarah's like well why is the faucet I was like well the kids did it and she was like I don't think they did I don't think they could have and I was like well let's go look we go out there and there's frickin raccoon paws leading all the way up to the sink and then the sink is still on and I was like obviously a raccoon walked up turned the sink on washed its hands and then didn't turn the sink off because why would it it's raccoon andity yeah yes they performed raccoon andity upon you yes we got yeah I believe that's called being raccoon and it did it's not a kunity it's raccoon andity we're sure about this yeah we have one raccoon andity if we prefer it but I think it's raccoon andity look maybe raccoon andity is all raccoon kind but raccoon andity is what all raccoon kind get up gets up to yes raccoon andity is all raccoon together and raccoon andity is the behavior of raccoon andity I want to be in a band called raccoon andity we're gonna have so much fun on that stage oh man yes just you're like one thing that there definitely is is your little kiss but for raccoons you wear like raccoon makeup at all your shows yeah yeah your hardcore fans dress up as raccoons there's a future where they make it and we don't and in that case I mean that's not saying it's 90-10 in favor of raccoons and they are the most likely species I think just given their hand shape to achieve sentience yeah they got a lot going for them for sure they're walking around on two legs sometimes they watch their hands you know they know what's a pandemic you're being careful out there they heard that I had covid and so they they rammed at the sink they were like oh my god oh my god oh jeez oh jeez you know the guy who is in that house he's got the covid don't touch the handle again just leave it off why would we turn it off we turn it off right here something the water bill raccoon andity look it out for number one oh all right Hank this week in AFC Wimbledon news AFC Wimbledon went to nil up in a football game for the third consecutive time and the universally the response among AFC Wimbledon fans was oh no what fresh hell is this it's I've never seen a group of people be less excited about to know there was it was just universally immediate the moment the second goal went in which was a really good freak it by Ethan chisley and the first one was by Nathan young cooms and why see the moment that second goal went in every Wimbledon fan you can see it in the crowd every fan was like oh no not this again but maybe because our opponents Crawley town aren't really really terrible or maybe because they got a 55th minute red card oh wow uh we managed to secure a two nil victory they got a 55 minute red card and you didn't score again no but I think to be fair the AFC Wimbledon players might have been under like team orders not to shoot the ball under any circumstances and indeed pass it and pass it and pass it just just just kill time yeah it truly felt like AFC Wimbledon manager Johnny Jackson had said to the boys um if you we get a two-nil lead you will not concede a goal I don't care what else happens you will not concede a goal yeah I want you to take the football put it in your mouth and swallow it there were so many times where like one of the younger players like tried to like take a free kick or something and uh one of the old players usually Chris Gunter would would take his hands and like lower the temperature he would be like calm we got a calm down there is no rush here so we held on to our two-nil lead which I think was the whole job and now we have won a second game in 2022 a second league two game which is great news and uh we are in 10th place in league two which is not not how bad I was the news from March I'm used to typing league two table to see the table instead of league one table it's it takes a little while to get used to it's a shift yeah well what are you gonna do well I will say this uh this guy Nathan Young Pooms who is on loan from Brentford he's scored three goals uh so far which is uh I think as many goals as any of our strikers scored last season so it's good it's good well this week at Mars News John you know what would be nice is if we could grow food on Mars and that's what scientists are trying to figure out so they've tried a whole bunch of uh crops in various various crops in basically trying to figure out Mars like soil doesn't have any organic carbon in it so that's you know tricky or for plants doesn't have the other nutrients that would be created by living stuff on earth according to researchers the winner is alfalfa it's kind of too bad but it's food so not only what researchers able to grow a small crop of alfalfa in their version of Martian soil they also crush that crop in the powder to make it into fertilizer that could then be used to grow more complex crops like uh turnips still not great news but like better so if we yeah so for like 12 years we're gonna have to grow lots of alfalfa on Mars crush it up and then have a turnip party if you can grow some turnips uh alfalfa turnips seem like just not I mean I've never wanted to go to Mars but I really don't yeah uh well don't worry John there's there's another option they also found that they could use marine cyanobacteria called sine cocacas uh PCC 7002 uh oh yeah and that actually they use that to desalinate water which would be useful on Mars because it has very briny water so going forward researchers want to see how other crops maybe some better ones fair in the soil they'll also need to find a way to deal with the fact that Martian soils have perchlorates in them which kill things from earth including people oh yikes perchlorates might be the biggest problem about going to Mars um and seems like a big problem yeah it's not clear how universal they are but they seem if they are universal it's gonna be tricky yeah that seems like a huge issue yeah wow it is a huge issue so the good news is that maybe by the time 2028 rolls around will all be robots uh with inside computers uh yeah I mean I think that that seems like the easiest way right like there's a part of me that's like it seems a really hard to like reverse engineer a planet for these uh this particular organisms seems yeah seems like it might be easier to just do the person right yeah people are smaller than planets they're complicated though it's all quite tough it's all quite tough I agree with that analysis but it's great to know that we could grow alpha which we could then turn into terms all right thank you for plotting with me and thanks to everybody for listening you can email us your questions we promise we'll answer more next time at hankandjohn at gmail.com we're off to record our patreon only podcast this week and stuff where we talk about things that we like this week this podcast is edited by Joseph Tuna Medici it's produced by Rosie Anna Halzer-Hoss our communications coordinator is Brooke Shotwell our editorial assistant is Debukitrakravari the music you're hearing now and the beginning of the podcast is by the great conerola and as they stay in our hometown don't forget to be awesome