Hey, so something worth knowing is a benefit for the nonprofit organization that makes Crash Course and SciShow Complexly. It's September 16th, 2026 in Los Angeles, California at the Wilshire Ebell Theater. Please join us. It's going to be incredible.
Friends have Complexly like Mark Rober, Katie Max, Simone Yech, and Moore will share inspiring talks about what makes them hopeful and join Hank Green on stage for fun, interactive discussions. Complexly has been creating free educational content like SciShow and PBS eons and Crash Course and Bizarre Beasts for nearly 15 years and 6 billion views. But this year, we have become a 501c3 nonprofit and we're doing something worth knowing as an in-person event that benefits Complexly and our impactful educational media. It's the first ever Complexly in-person event and it's a fundraiser to support our mission of inspiring curiosity and lowering barriers to knowledge building because curiosity builds understanding and understanding builds a better world.
Tickets to the general public June 30th at somethingworthknowing.com. So come build a better world with us on September 16th and experience something worth knowing you can get your ticket at Complexly.info slash something. Welcome to Dear Hank and John. Thor's I prefer to think of the Dear John and Hank.
It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions, give you these advice and bring you all the weeks news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. John, do you hear the latest Kanye Pete Davidson drama? No, I mean, but you want to talk about being behind the time, Hank. But no, I have not heard the latest Kanye and Pete Davidson drama.
Please do inform me. So it turns out that Pete Davidson's real name, just like my real name isn't technically Hank. His real name is John. And Kanye says that that makes their contract that they have together for a business relationship that I just made up invalid and quote Kanye West, pizza John.
What? Pizza John. Wow. I mean, that okay.
It's pizza Miss John. I know, but that was tortured. It's pizza. That was that you know, you know, how some books you read them and you're like this, you know, this writing just feels effortless.
It feels like this just flowed out of the author. And then other books you read them and you're like, wow, the author really had to do some work here. But gosh, that work was so valuable because look at what they made with all of this trial and tribulation. Like you read Ulysses and you don't think like, oh, this was an easy one, but you do think like it's good though.
That joke was both labored and bad. Well, if it seemed labored, that's not what happened. I had the punch line when I started, but I didn't have the setup. So I just sort of went, I just went, what would happen.
But I knew that pizza John is where I wanted to end. Pizza mists.com is where you go to get your pizza scare 100% of the proceeds go to charity. I can't really explain to you what pizza mists is, except that it's like a two week long celebration of me having a mustache once 15 years ago. But what about pizza mists?
One of my favorite things about pizza mists is when John finally shaves off his freaking beer. The beer situation is it's frankly a crisis. Like, I'm taking this pottery class with Sarah so that I can. Wow.
All the pottery people have never seen you without it. No, they've never seen me without it. But also like the some of the pottery, what's the pottery stuff called clay? Some of the clay got in my beard and then I was like trying to get it out of my beard with like a beard comb.
And I was like, I hate everything about this. I timed this year's pizza mists mustache so poorly. Yeah. Yeah.
You want to wait two or seven three weeks before pizza mists. I had the pizza mists mustache ready to go. And the problem is that it wasn't pizza mists yet. And so I just had to keep growing this beard and Sarah keeps saying, you know, you could trim it.
Like there's no law that says that you have to. Yeah, at least the neck area, the back portion. Maximum beard. And I think I am.
I think I am going to trim it tonight because I'm done. I can't stop touching my face. But you are not allowed. You are not allowed to trim the mustache.
The mustache has to be as long as possible. I know I know. I know. Okay.
This is going to be the first, the most full pizza mists mustache of all time. It will be the biggest pizza mists mustache. But that means the same thing is the best pizza. You heard it here first, folks.
This pizza mists 2022 is going to have the biggest pizza mists mustache of all time. I remember when you were doing pizza mists, we were filling the paper town's movie and I only had like 10 days of mustache growth and it was so bad. It was barely visible. This year is definitely going to be visible.
Don't we? He's going to say it's not a mustache. So I don't know why, but we make videos for two weeks a year. We make them like we used to back in 2007 when we made a video every weekday.
It's super fun. I'm actually coming out to Indianapolis for a week of pizza mists so that we can be together, which hasn't been the case for an awful long time. We had a pizza mists together on the road. What was that paper?
What was that? Turtles. Turtles. 2017.
Yeah. It's been a long time. And so it's been a while. And I'm really looking forward to being out there to goof around with you and have a grand old time.
Well, Hank, I will be gone for part of pizza mists because I have to fly to Los Angeles to see a second cut of the Turtles all the way down movie. I saw the first cut last week and it's so good. It's so beautiful. I was really astonished by how good it is.
As an editor, did you then have a conversation with the director about all the changes and cuts and how you would create creative decisions differently as a vlogbrother? Have you thought about just doing jump cuts? Yeah. It feels like there's a lot of work here and making scenes happen.
And why not just have the head move to the other side of the screen without warning? No, I did not make any editorial suggestions. I loved the movie though. Rosie Ann and I saw it together.
My producer partner Rosie Ann Rojas. And it's really extraordinary. The performances in it are so good. And so, you know, seeing a second cut is going to be super fun and relaxing because the first cut was great.
It's really it's just incredible. But yeah, it'll be fun to be traveling during pizza mists again. I haven't done that in a while. The last couple of pizza mists, as you may remember, were it's mid-pandemic-y.
So not that this one won't be at all pandemic-y, but I will at least be on an airplane, which is the life that I'm accustomed to, if not necessarily the life that I want. You're gonna have a wild time, John. Yeah. Yeah.
It's gonna be a quick trip, but I'm really excited to see the movie with more of the folks who helped make it. Well, congratulations. I'm very excited to see it. Thanks.
All right. I think I'm with this question from Kat who writes, Dear John and Hank, while my sister was filling out her college application, one of the questions was, if you could require every college student to take one class that doesn't already exist, what would that class be? Ooh. What would your response be?
I said a class on how to have a civil conversation. DFTBA, Kat. Yeah. I think that's a really good one, actually.
Yeah. Conflict and de-escalation would be a great, a great class for everyone to take. Conflict management, of course. Like Ryan Reynolds put us through here on this very pocket.
I mean, I still, I think about Ryan Reynolds' lessons in conflict management every single day. I think that this country needs, I think also, I think that that course should be taught within three different frames. One frame, personal conflict, two frame, observing conflict. So, then the way that you observe conflict that's going on, that you are not a part of.
So, the way I might think about, you know, a conflict happening in another country. And then, a broad societal conflict that I am a part of, how do we imagine and progress successfully through those different things? Because I think understanding national conflict through the lens, I often will look at a conflict that's happening somewhere else. And I'll be like, this is very simple.
I see exactly what's happening here. But then when I'm in one of those conflicts in my country, I'm like, this is not simple at all. And I do not see what's happening here, except that there's a bunch of people who are bad and a bunch of people who are good. And that's it.
Right. Right. It's the same phenomenon as when you read the New York Times and it's talking about a subject that you aren't an expert in, and you're like, oh, now I know the news. But if you read the New York Times and it's about a subject that you are an expert in, you're like, no, no, no, it's way more complicated than that New York talk.
You missed all of this stuff. You missed all of the subtleties and nuances. I think that would be a good course for sure. I also think like media literacy, data literacy would be a great course because we all need more of that than we have, I think, like more awareness of what's going on inside of ourselves when we encounter data sets and media and a better understanding of the sort of like multimedia war for human attention that is going on right now.
I think that if I could only teach one glass, it would be a class that every college student in America had to take. It would be a class in, it would be called work, it would be called, it would be called the novels of the Green Brothers in hardcover. And it would just be meeting all of my books and both of your books in hardcover. Wow, John, I like, I like the selfishness.
Mine would be called Sock Clubs of America. Which one is right for you? Probably the only one. I don't know why there isn't a class called storytelling because we do storytelling in all kinds of classes.
But I feel like it's sort of it's like down there not being talked about. It's like in amongst us, in amongst all the things, but then it never gets its time in the light and it needs it. Yeah, you love a focus on narrative. I do.
I do. Well, it's the only way we can teach anything. Right. Right.
The only way the information has anything to hang off of. Right. Narrative is so underappreciated. You're right.
Like the storytelling strategies are a form of media literacy. I was thinking last night as I was failing to go to sleep during an epic thunderstorm. I was thinking last night that I often talk about how these huge media companies are competing for the most precious resource in the world, which is your attention and the ability to monetize your attention. And I really do believe that human attention is by far the most valuable resource on earth today.
But then I was like, except I am also trying to capture and monetize people's attention. Like I act as if this is a problem that only large media companies have. But I would like people to buy my books and spend a number of hours reading them. And I would like people to listen to our podcast, which is capturing and monetization of human attention.
And so really, and then I was thinking maybe the definition of art is an attempt to capture human attention. Like I think that there has to be well, I'm glad that we got into the let's define art conversation because every time I've been in it, it's always gone really well. That's right. It's easy and easy out just like other people's problems.
I think that so I think that there is so easy to solve. I think that the thing, but I think you did get close to something interesting. I think that makes it art is what you do with the attention when you have it. Now what thing you do that becomes art?
I'm not going to comment on that. But something about that. So I think that there are definitely things that you can do with the attention once you have it that are not art. And which is which?
Leave that to the scholars. Yeah. That's a good point because cable news is not just not art. It doesn't seem to be art.
No, no one thinks it's art. You may think it's good. You may think it's bad, but we're pretty sure it's not art. That's a great point.
Art is non journalistic attempts to capture human attention. You're right. You can't find it. Nope.
Nope. You can't define it. It's bigger. It's bigger than our definition.
All right, Roger Ebert. All right. I don't remember the question, but I think we answered it. Absolutely, John.
We're expert podcasters. This next question comes from Jennifer who asks Dear Hank and John, I bought a sneets of John last pizza mess. And when I wear it, I receive compliments about the shirt. How do I know?
How do I know if people are complimenting the shirt because it looks very cool and has pizza on it or because they're nerdfighters and they understand what's going on. Pizza mess is great. Jennifer, she didn't actually say that. Yeah, it's a bold choice to wear a pizza John shirt.
And you never know if it's a nerd fighter compliment or just a compliment on an excellent t-shirt design, right? Well, it's like, there has to be a protocol. We got to establish a protocol. Yes, that's what I was going to say.
So you're listening right now. So the thing is, you can't say great shirt because there are lots of great shirts in the world. If you mean, I know what's going on, you pointed them in the face and you say, I know what's going on. That reminds me when I was on the Chicago train once years ago, when a person randomly pointed at me and said, boy, you got the devil inside of you.
And I was like, oh crap, that's just what I didn't need to know. Probably right. Yeah, exactly. I was like, you're telling me.
I don't think that's a good idea. I think that's I think that's a little too aggressive. I think the obvious thing to say is DFTBA. But I think it might be funnier if you said, you know, Pete Davidson's a John.
Pete's a John. By the way, Hank, did you know this? What? About Pete Davidson?
What about Pete Davidson? That his first name is in fact, John? I am. I do not believe you.
Oh, I'm not giving up. I'm not that didn't work, but I'm going to believe myself. And his middle name is the same as your middle name, though. That's true.
That's true. Pete Davidson is 28 years old. I feel like I shouldn't talk about him. He's too young to be the butt of jokes.
Yeah. He's just getting stoned out of the system to deal with that yet. He's just getting tired. He even started making vlogbrothers when he was a one year of vlogbrothers.
And I could handle it if some random podcaster made a joke about how my name's John. I still, by the way, I still can't handle it. Right? Like, I still get upset when people make jokes about me and they're like, well, it doesn't matter.
He's not a person. And I'm like, well, I feel like one. I'm a person on the inside. Do you think Pete Davidson's like that?
Do you think all celebrities are actually just people? That would be that's terrible. No, God, that's strange. Strange thing I find about.
Actually, devastating news. If I have to start thinking of celebrities the way I think of people. So I Google Pete Davidson and that little area on the side where it's like, here's like your basic information about Pete Davidson. His subjects.
1993, which is unacceptable. And I find it very strange that we get to find out about Pete Davidson's parents, but also his uncle. That is weird. That is weird.
He's got an uncle section. An uncle, a whole section for uncle. We don't. We got plenty of uncles.
I don't see him. I don't see him having an uncle section. I see him having an uncle section. I like the fact that his subjects include social awkwardness, recreational drunkies, and self-deprecation.
Oh, that's great. I didn't see that. We're getting different Googles. Oh, do I have subjects?
I don't know. But Pete Davidson subjects are similar to yours, probably actually closer to mine. I would suspect. It's nice to be able to be summed up so quick.
You know, we don't neither of us have subjects, which means it's time to choose our subjects. Oh, that's a great idea. That's a great idea. First off, I'd like self-deprecation.
If I'm going to have one of Pete Davidson subjects, I would like it to be self-deprecation. You, by the way, cannot have self-deprecation because no, no absolutely not. So I get pelicans and corn dogs. All right.
I would like to get penguins of Madagascar and then in parentheses, film. Okay. I'm not interested in the book series or whatever. I'm only interested in the movie.
One of my subjects. One of my subjects beat you. Pelicans, corn dogs, John Green. Science, comma, all.
But like surface level. Science, comma, all, surface level. Mind you, like history and then in parentheses, amateur. Well, wait, wait.
You do have a genre, though. One of your genres is Big Dunks Roman. Do you know what that is? Not when you say it that way.
What's building Roman? Building Roman is a coming of age novel. It's basically a way of repeating YA fiction. But my other, my other genres are interesting.
They are romance, radio, and video. I didn't know radio. Here we are. That's great.
Oh, man. My Wikipedia page hasn't been updated significantly in a very long time. Like there's still a lot of it that's about like Tumblr in 2014. And I never changes.
It gets funnier with each passing week. You got a great Wikipedia, John. There's a lot of things on there. A lot of ones.
You won a Prince award. You won the audio award. And you won the, what's your weirdest award? The Edgar Allan Poe award is a little weird, just because I have won a lot of awards.
I'm looking at this list now and I didn't know about some of these. You just, you just, you, you. Oh, I, that list also hasn't updated since 2014. I've won some things since then.
I won a Los Angeles Times book. The weirdest award I've ever won is the Korean Literature award, which is like the German Children's Literature Prize. And it is the most beautiful porcelain figurine I have ever seen. It is hard to overstate.
Like I flew to Germany just to get this figurine is how beautiful it is. I have a big question. Yeah. From your Wikipedia page.
Were you on a Brazilian soap opera? Yes. Okay. I was on it.
I didn't make that up. I was on a telenovela. Is that in my Wikipedia page? Yeah, it's on your filmography.
This is now the worst episode of Dering and John, which is just editing each other's Wikipedia pages. I was gonna make sure that wasn't made up. Really? Silboprophy?
It's a little hard to explain. Did you go to Brazil? Yeah. What?
Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. I was on a what the heck?
Yeah. It was a weird situation. Yeah. We were there for Nat Wolf and I were there for the paper towns, press junket, and then they flew us in a helicopter across town to this large like sound stage where they had created all of these different movie sets.
It was kind of like, you know, on the Paramount set or something. And then they were like, you're gonna be in the soap operas. I don't know. And they were like, you're just playing yourself.
You don't have to speak Portuguese or anything. And I was like, yeah, I mean, I'm the only person I can. Yeah. Yeah.
I've got my acting range is limited. Oh, by the way. One of the limitations is English. One of many.
I could really only play a version of myself and which is what I did. And they were like, oh my God, are you John Green? And I was like, yeah. And then I scooted past them in the movie theater as they were watching paper towns together.
These like two actors in the soap operas. Is that why you flew to Brazil? I think it was one of the main reasons. Yeah.
Oh my God. I exhausted just thinking about that. It was a little bit of a stressful time. So if you see someone wearing a pizza John shirt, can I tell you about the turtles all the way down thing though?
We go, you just do that. You point yourself and you point to them and you go, at like that. No, you say DFTBA. Can I tell you about the turtles all the way down thing though?
I'm not going to say DFTBA. That'd be too awkward. Tell me about the turtles all the way down thing. I I'm in the movie.
I don't know if I'm going to be in the movie if and when it comes out, but I was in the movie that I saw and I wasn't bad. You're getting better. I don't like as you know, self-deprecation is one of my things, at least according to my future Wikipedia page. But I thought I was I was definitely the worst actor with a line in the movie.
You know, like, like you watch the movie and then at the end of it, you were like, Hey, was there one person who couldn't act? Then you would know who it was. But I think I was I think I was pretty good. Like I was much better than I was in that scene in the Fault in Our Stars that was so bad.
Yeah, come a long way. All right. I'm looking forward to it. This question comes from Maya John, who says Dear Hank and John, I'm a PhD student and I teach a seminar on Zoom every Wednesday.
Today, one of my students was wearing the Sneets of John shirt from this year's pizza mess. Did you only look out for pizza questions? I just searched for Sneets of John. Sneets of John.
What up the other ones? Well, I was somebody who wins? I want to settle this one. And this person Maya doesn't know what to do.
This is a common problem. So common, it's happened twice to the same shirt. I don't understand why you don't just say DFTBA. Like we have a thing that people say pizza John.
I think you do like maybe you do a Mario voice. I think you have to just be like, Hey, it's a Sneets of John. Oh, wow. Okay.
That's it. Everybody, we figured it out for you. John asked me a question that isn't something to do with pizza. And I'll be back with another pizza question.
People say I can't act. It's me pizza John. It's hurting me. It's hurting.
I'm so gifted. You know, like some people have to do so much work. Oh, God, stop talking about it. Get into character.
And for me, it's so natural. Kirsten writes Hello, Green Brothers. I'm a high school teacher and I have a student tell me that I look like I eat trail mix. I don't know what they meant by this, but I know that it was intended as an insult.
What could possibly have been meant? Why am I so offended? And what course of punishment does this deserve? I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
I'm hoping you can give me some clarity pumpkins and penguins Kirsten. So the only first of all, you are right to hate this. I hate it. Yeah.
And I say this with love. Like you also look like you eat trail mix. And I do eat trail mix. But also that's fine.
So that's what I mean. And I do. And look, that's good. So here's this thing.
I don't know whether you eat trail mix, Kirsten. And I don't think that this is acceptable behavior, but there is only one recourse, which is that you have to bring this teacher trail mix every day. No, it's a student. Oh, it's a student.
Oh, you're a teacher and the students have this. Oh, okay. Thank God. Okay.
Now I'm on board. My brain broke. Yeah, that would be that's that's I think that you now have a student who deserves a little bag of trail mix every day. No, I think the right thing to do is to just the next day in class, just be eating trail mix.
Just like you're right. I am the kind of person who eats trail mix. Like I'm a little granola. I care about the earth.
Because that's what trails. I actually don't know if trail mix is carbon neutral, but it feels like it wants to be, you know, it feels like it's easier to green wash than most foods. Sure. I mean, it's I mean, there's no meat in it.
So there's that if your trail mix has beef jerky cubes, that's not allowed. That's right. That's not trail mix. If your trail mix has beef, it's not.
I'm thinking about it. I could chop up some of those cubes and a little piece and mix them with all the peanuts. I think that'd be good. I think that you should definitely eat trail mix all the time now.
Every time that's doing this in your class, you should just be popping back the trail mix. Like what of it? You want some? Yeah, I'll share.
It's wild. Like it's I guess we have our signifiers and we shouldn't imagine that we don't have our signifiers. What we choose to wear, what we choose to drive, how we choose to act, how we speak, all of these things look kind of shoes we wear. They all say stuff about us.
Right. And should they maybe not, but like these short hands are never going to go away, you look like a person that eats trail mix for that student. And they thought that that would be an okay thing to say. And I think that the only way to exercise the dominance you need to exercise over this person is to have a lot of trail mix around now.
Right. Yeah, just have like a like a bowl full of it on the way in that anybody could just stick their hands in. Just put it on the desk. Nothing says.
Waiting for it back to heading back to a new normal quick like a joke and to go with trail mix, but anybody can dip their hands into. That's right. That's the classic communal classroom trail mix mold. It's back.
Hey, can I ask you a question? Is time? Oh, no. Just entropy increasing.
Apparently, that's what they say. Time is just a measure of entropy. I don't buy it. Like that's what they say, but I don't buy it because I don't sense the increase in entropy.
Now, I do understand that the increase in entropy, which is the randomness of everything, is a sort of the inevitable consequence and like the one thing that goes in a clear time direction. Like, I'm like, okay, I'll sign on board for that. That that has a time vector. But I don't think that's what time is, but physicists think it is.
And I'm like, you know way more than me. But I'm not experiencing entropy increasing. I'm experiencing time passing. It's totally different to me as an observer.
Yeah, I was reading a historian recently who wrote that we think of the past as being remembered and the future as being unknowable. But in fact, the idea that the past is known in a recorded, reliable, historical way is a very recent construct. And 2000 years ago, the future was predictable through oracles. And the past was when turtles had the earth on their back and Odysseus was battling Cyclops.
And that's what memory looked like and what the future looked like. And this idea that we are progressing through linear time is not universal among humans. No. It's not universally held among all humans who ever lived.
Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, that was a very difficult thing to have any kind of evidence for. Right.
But there's also eschatologies that imagine circular times like Hindu eschatology imagines. I'm not getting into this. I don't know what eschatology means. It means end of the world.
Okay. Well, it's not going to do it. All right. I just wanted to know.
And I need someone to explain it to me better. I've read several books on the topic and they do tend to hurt physically. Time is so weird. It's so weird.
It's so weird. It's so much weirder than we thought. This next question comes from Brynne who asks, Dear Hank and John, I'm getting married in five days. We plan to have our favorite pizza place, cater with their pizza truck.
We have been together for eight years and we love this pizza. We celebrate every milestone with this pizza. And today, five days before the wedding, the pizza truck broke down and will not be operational in time for the wedding. We cannot get the pizzas to us.
Fortunately, we're having a small wedding. So we figured out how to get some food there. But how do you handle something going so wrong that was supposed to be so perfect? I'm nervous also that I will hold a grudge against this pizza place forever.
Pineapples and pizza lists, Brynne. Brynne, let me answer your question with a question. Am I marching through time or is time marching through me? Is that so entropy is what caused that pizza truck to break down?
No doubt about like there is one configuration in which that engine works and there are trillions in which it does not. And so there is an inevitable future in which every engine will no longer work. Yeah. And so what really happened is not that anything went wrong with your wedding or with or with the pizza truck or anything like that.
What really happened is time. What really happened is that time did what time will always do. Oh, God, which is cause everything to fall apart. Anyway, happy marriage.
Marriage is, by the way, a tremendously wonderful thing. I'm so glad that you have already enjoyed this message from last year. There's one big downside of it, of course. Oh, well, it only ends.
It inevitably ends. It inevitably ends. Not only does it inevitably end. In the best case scenario, it ends in death.
Right. Well, in the best case scenario, it ends in simultaneous double death at the age of 130. Yes, that is the best case scenario. Yeah.
And a skater and a tragic but very, very rapid accident of some sorts. Shortly after celebrating their 101st anniversary, Sarah and John Green plunged to their death over Niagara Falls. No, no, I don't want to be scared. I want to be no scared.
I might be wrong. But when I'm 130, I don't think you'll be able to scare me. I think that part of me. I think that part of me will die decades earlier.
No, wow. If John Green believes there's a future where John Green is not scared of things that's that'll give anybody hope, at least. I'm sorry that this happened. But but one thing about marriage that that maybe we all learn and it's best to learn it soon is that always there are going to be things that are not perfect.
And marriage is about each other, not about pizza. But life is also about each other enjoying pizza. So continue to enjoy your favorite pizza place and continue to enjoy each other. As long as you and the pizza place last, which won't be that long.
Wow. It's like a man yanking on the steering wheel of the car I am driving. No, you shouldn't say that. You should say it's like, it's like I'm a balloon that like there's a weight on the balloon of myself.
It's like I have a sailboat and I'm trying to go in the direction that the wind is blowing me away from. I know it's possible. I'm glad about it. Yeah.
I think it's more like if we're going to use similes, it's more like if you are trying like just imagine what it was like to grow up with me. Like our daughter has this incredible habit of being like, well, at least like if something terrible happens, I was always like, well, at least it was just my baby teeth that got knocked out or whatever. And unlike that, but the opposite where I'm like, well, at least it's all still temporary and fragile and precarious and will inevitably fall apart. Yeah.
It was never going to work anyway. You were always you were always going to lose access to that pizza. So just go, don't you do it. This isn't even that much of a joke.
Like I will sometimes have conversations with John where where he's like, well, in two years, and I'm like, yeah, two years from now. So let's just let's do the two years. Right. You do say that a lot, which reminds me that this podcast is brought to you by the two years.
The two years are going to be great. Even if at the end of the two years, you have to stop doing that thing and do something else. Are you specifically referencing the conversation we were having right before this podcast? I know.
I don't think so. What was that conversation? I was like, we can't I was like, I don't think we'll still be doing vlogbrothers when we're 70. Like we have to stop at some point and you were like, you were like, yeah, and I was like, so when do we stop?
And you were like, I don't know, not now. Not this week. Yeah. Why are you thinking about this?
Not soon. Like I'm I'm enjoying a great deal. Yeah. No, now that you now that you present it that way, a huge percentage of my life is thinking about things that don't matter today.
Yeah, I think that there are some teachings about that somewhere. It's so funny because I am always preaching this, but I am never internalizing it. Like I get so frustrated on on TikTok when people are like, oh, like nothing matters anyway. Like everything's crap and everything sucks and like the world's gonna end regardless.
I'm like, yeah, of course, that was never not the case. Like the world was always gonna end regardless. I'm so glad that you got to the whole point, but which is which is that like the value comes from us and it comes from us now. Yeah, we don't live there.
We don't live in the billionaire timescale. We live here now with a bunch of other people whose lives we can make better. You're right, Hank. I got to internalize that.
This podcast also brought to you by John internalizing that we live here now with a bunch of people whose lives we can make better. We live here now with a bunch of people whose lives we can make better. Tagline. My guest is also brought to you by John Pete Davidson.
Pizza John. And today's podcast is brought to you by America's new favorite college course, the novels of John and Hank Green and Hardback. We just want to steal money from students. We've given enough, John.
That's the tagline. We've given enough time for us. Give it anything. I mean, just crash course.
That's true. We never really got paid for it. Yeah, that's what it's all about. Suddenly, suddenly, I'm like, should we got money for that?
I never occurred to me until just now. No, and I think that we have benefited from it in many ways. Yeah, no, I mean, that's true. Peter Muhlenberg, Hank.
Peter Muhlenberg, American clergyman, continental army soldier. And I was going to say sign her of the Declaration of Independence, but no, he didn't. He was named John Peter Muhlenberg. There you go.
That's true. That stuff gives you confidence early on and it gives other people confidence in what you're doing. You're not wondering whether the payment system is going to work. You're not wondering whether customers can get through the process.
Shopify handles that foundation so you can focus on the thing that you're actually trying to do. It's really kind of amazing to me that Shopify is a tool that works from the first day your store launches when you're just starting to get customers all the way up to being the size of good.store or dftba.com or being the size of like Mattel and Gymshark. When you build a Shopify, you're building with tools that already work at every scale. All you need is the idea Shopify handles the rest.
You can start your free trial at Shopify.com slash deerhank. Start your free trial at Shopify.com slash deerhank with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27th, 2026. See website for more details. This episode of Deerhank is brought to you by Factor.
Imagine for a moment that you are absolutely immersed in some work where you're creating something beautiful or useful or useless and ugly but you love it anyway and you look up and suddenly you have a feeling and that feeling is that it is 2.30 pm and that you did not eat lunch. What are you gonna do? Are you gonna get meal delivery that's gonna cost too much and maybe be a bit of a mistake or are you gonna go to the cupboard and just eat several fistfuls of peanuts? Those are my two choices unless I have a factor in the fridge.
You can get smoky barbecue chicken breast with potato mash, cream corn and peppers. You can get creamy lemon pepper chicken with veggie rice peel off broccoli and carrots. This has the fiber I need. It has the protein I need and it has the delicious ness I need.
What about garlic herb roasted barramundi with potato zucchini and burr blanc sauce? I don't really know what that means but it sounds delicious. What about a black bean taco bowl with corn salsa and cilantro crema? A delicious high fiber high protein meal that no animals had to die for.
Any of those can be ready in two minutes. Fresh, never frozen, over 100 rotating weekly meals including globally inspired flavors like Mediterranean and Asian, Factor shops, preps, cooks and delivers straight to your door so you have more time for everything you love this spring. Head to FactorMeals.com slash deer hank 50 off and use the code deerhank50off to get 50% off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27th 2026. See website for more details.
Pete Muhlenberg's a John. I found one. I've reached well done. I'm really impressed.
I guess it had to happen. He was a Lutheran. Wow. Another thing about pizza John Muhlenberg or Hank that I did not know until just now is you know because I never heard of the guy.
Do you know when Rocky is in Philadelphia and he like runs up the stairs? And remember how there's that statue? Sure. That's pizza John Muhlenberg.
Pizza John Muhlenberg. Everybody go. That's our new thing that we all do on pizza. Pizza us.
I did it. I did it. Pizza John. Everybody knows what I did except for you.
I did it. I did it. I did it. I did it.
I did it. Oh, it was fake. Remember earlier in the podcast where you were like, ah, that Pete Davidson's real name was John and I was like, I'm still gonna get you. I just I just had to wait and I did it.
I did it. I did it. There is a statue. You said I did it seven times before I realized you did it.
There's a statue of pizza John Muhlenberg in Philadelphia, but it's not that statue. It's not that statue. This next question comes from Cameron who asks steer Hank and John. So you're supposed to leave out and they'll cook you for Santa Claus on Christmas Eve.
Well, on pizza, miseve, what beverage are we supposed to leave out for this with a slices of pizza for pizza John? I just I just take cash usually. Just whatever feels right for Crash Course, you know, just like think about the thing about the quality is added to your life and then hit me up on the on the Venmo. You can take cash.
It's like obviously Easter Bunny. Obviously Easter Bunny. Whatever you whatever you whatever the oh sorry tooth fairy whatever the tooth fairy gives you for a tooth that's how much you give pizza John. Yeah.
Yeah. It's just sort of a it's just sort of a straight from the tooth fairy to the pizza John pipeline. I don't want to be clear all the proceeds from pizzamas.com go to charity, but when you cash at me, that's that's my spend money. That's mine.
Good Lord. Um, you want to know the best part about this pizza John Muhlenberg statue? I realize that there is no statue that Rocky goes up to in the movie. Yeah.
Yeah. I'm pretty sure there wasn't in Philadelphia. Well, I mean, that was Rocky is like my greatest trick of all time. All right.
Well done, John. Some of that garlic dipping sauce too. In addition to the cash. No, in addition to the pizza and the cash is not and also a small a small statue of pizza John Muhlenberg.
I can't believe that we discovered pizza John Muhlenberg too late to make any pizza John Muhlenberg merch. What a horrible error. It is what it is, John. Somebody at home 3D print one for yourself.
There's a fairly good chance that next week when I am trying to travel to it from Los Angeles in a 24 hour period and make a YouTube video that I will be making a biography of pizza John Muhlenberg. Well, of course it would be really biography of pizza John Muhlenberg. The original pizza John. Well Hank, it's time for the on important news for Mars and AFC Wimbledon.
I'll go first. The news for AFC Wimbledon is worrisome. It's worrisome. We lost another football game.
We did not look good. We lost two one, but that rather obscures the fact that we were outplayed pretty much every second of the game and scored a somewhat fluke goal. Now we're in 17th place in League 2. As you'll recall, League 2 is the league you really, really cannot get relegated out of because it's almost impossible to get back up and because if you get relegated out you're technically not in the football league, not a full-time professional team anymore.
There's been a lot of discussions over the last week about what Wimbledon needs to do including discussions that Hank and I've had where I asked him to give me a lot of money and he said no. Yeah, this is why you have to leave money for pizza John. It's all I'm going to do with it. I swear.
Yeah, I mean, it's really tough because it's not only a financial problem. Wimbledon does have a lot of debt because of the stadium. Some of that debt is high interest. Those are real concerns, but also our playing budget is plenty good enough to stay in League 2.
It's middle of the pack for League 2 and our attendance at Plow Lane is actually pretty close to the top of League 2, which is awesome and really exciting and speaks to the fact that this football club has a really strong community at the center of it. But right now it's really hard to figure things out and it's hard to know what's going wrong, but this is for straight losses and in League 2 you just can't afford to get anywhere near the bottom two. So yeah, it's worrisome. So there's only two relegation spots and two promotion spots?
Is that what's up? There's only two relegation spots and so if you go down to fifth to, okay, there's only two very hard to get back up because there's only two. Yeah, this is the most worried I've been since we started the podcast. In many ways, Wimbledon's dreams have come true.
We have a stadium, it's owned by the fans. The club is still fan owned, but we're starting to see a lot more tension and questions among the fan base. Is this the right strategy? And I'm a big believer in fan ownership.