39. CONFESSION: Can You Love Someone and Still Dread S*x?

‘Not tonight’ isn’t rejection — it’s survival. You can be deeply in love, feel safe and connected, and still feel absolutely no desire for sex. For neurodivergent mums, it’s not about being broken. It’s about being depleted. Burnout, overstimulation, resentment, and chronic executive load all take a toll — and desire doesn’t grow in captivity.This episode names the unspoken truth: you can love your partner and still dread intimacy when your nervous system is tapped out.What We Cover in This EpisodeWhy love and desire aren’t the same thingHow ADHD, burnout, and motherhood impact libidoThe difference between rejection and depletionVoices from ADHD mums on how sex feels in burnoutWhy desire needs space, safety, and energy to returnSmall ways to honour yourself without guilt or shameThis Episode Is For You If…You’re in a healthy relationship but feel no desire for sexEven the thought of being touched feels like one more demandYou’ve been told ‘sex is proof of love’ but feel otherwiseYou’re burnt out, touched out, or running on emptyYou want to know you’re not broken for feeling this wayReferences & Resources MentionedEsther Perel — Psychotherapist and author whose work on intimacy highlights that desire needs space and autonomy to thrive — two things ADHD mums are rarely afforded.ADHD Mums Facebook Group — A safe, supportive space where thousands of mums share the unfiltered truth about ADHD, burnout, intimacy, and the realities of daily life.ADHD Mums Jotform Confession Box — An anonymous space where mums contributed raw, honest experiences about sex, exhaustion, and survival with ADHD.🎧 Other Episode with Kylie Smart:S1 E43 PMS and ADHD S1 E48 Supplements and ADHDIf you’ve ever felt alone in this, these episodes prove you’re not.🎧 Listen now: Can You Love Someone and Still Dread Sex? — on Spotify, Apple, or adhdmums.com.auJOIN THE COMMUNITY:Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!FOLLOW FOR MORE:Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTubeLEAVE A REVIEW:Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.COLLABS:For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected] RESOURCES:Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.