61: Lessons in Self Love : Toxic Ancestors and Family Relationships

What this episode covers

In this episode, I explore a question from a listener: “Can you receive love and strength from ancestors or relatives still alive if they are mentally sick/toxic/unhealthy?” I discuss tuning into the soul of our family members that we feel challenged by to receive more than their human form can give us, how our “toxic dynamics or relationships” are the opening to the story of pain or loss in the family, and how these can be taken up as an opportunity to become aware of our gaps in self-love. I explore how our expectations on others to be different may be our own dependencies — how do we shift out of these? We expand your capacity to love yourself and offer self-forgiveness. I also briefly talk about what needs mending in ourselves, what love is and sorting out what love isn’t, and untangling abuse and other ideas tied to love. Check out the experientials where you can heal a part of your ancestry and recover love within yourself, shift a family relationship that is toxic by healing your inner child or younger self and bringing self-forgiveness to the judgments we hold about ourselves, particularly around dependency on others to provide us what we need. Links, Article, and Resources All Show Notes for This Episode 📝https://candicewu.com /toxicfamily  Podcast Homepage 🎧 https://candicewu.com/podcast Newsletter & Embody Community 💌 https://candicewu.com/embody-community Patreon – Your Support Means So Much! 💝 https://candicewu.com/patreon Candice Wu Page on Facebook 👫 https://facebook.com/EmbodyYourNature Follow Candice on Instagram 📷 https://instagram.com/EmbodyYourNature Sponsored by my new Skillshare Class on Dream Physiology I published a new class on Dream Work, which supports people who are interested in developing a stronger ability to remember their dreams and a connected relationship to their dream wisdom with embodiment practices. Dreaming: Embodiment Practices to Prepare Your Physiology For a Thriving Dream Life Our dreams offer access to energies and parts of ourselves that are hidden or unseen and wanting to be revealed. This class offers specific breathing techniques, yogic and body-centered practices, and meditations that you can use to ground yourself and develop safety and playfulness for your dreams to thrive. These practices will support your nervous system in feeling a level of deep rest and relaxation, giving the capacity for you to remember your dreams even better than before or for the first time. Learn more about my Dream Classes on Skillshare at candicewu.com/classes Show Notes 00:00 Intro 01:05 Opening: What Needs Mending? 04:10 Sponsored by My New Dream Physiology Class on Skillshare 07:35 Life Updates: Blizzards in Michigan 08:03 Working With the Challenges of the Ireland Experience 09:50 Bouncing Out of Social Into Doing Things - Energy Towards Myself 10:51 My Own Healing Journey 12:13 New Back Pain - What is My Back Saying? 14:47 Wanting to Be Held — Human and Childhood Needs 15:44 Connecting My Experience to Family Ancestry Trauma 17:31 More Enjoyment on My Healing Journey 19:07 This Week’s Topic: Receiving From Unhealthy and Toxic Relationships and Ancestors 20:52 Toxic Relationships Within the Your Family Line 27:02 Wishing That People Were Different — the Expectations and Dependency of It 27:55 Adult Now 28:54 Emotionally Distance Yourself // Compassion May Not Be the End All 30:33 Can We Cut Our Own Emotional Luggage? 32:44 It’s About You. 35:00 Underlying Family Constellations 39:03 Seeing the Soul of Someone Who Is Challenging Us 40:24 Using the Image of Someone Who Loves You 40:57 Working With Your Inner Parts Around Challenging Relationships 42:44 Asking Yourself: What Is Love? 43:57 Love in Families and People With Challenges 45:03 What if a Family System Has Accepted and Integrated Abuse as Love? 47:34 Work in Healing Ourselves 49:15 Other Interesting Episodes and Resources 50:47 This Week’s Healing Experientials 52:23 Closing — Tuning Into Where Your Heart Is Now 54:16 Embody