68. You Have More Influence Than You Think (Vanessa Bohns) 

In this episode of the Ideas on Stage podcast we spoke with Vanessa Bohns.Vanessa Bohns is a social psychologist and professor and chair of organizational behavior at Cornell University. She holds a PhD in Psychology from Columbia University and an AB from Brown University. She is author of the book You Have More Influence Than You Think (2021, Norton). Her writing has appeared in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Harvard Business Review, and her research has been featured in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Economist, and on NPR's Hidden Brain, among other outlets. She studies social influence, compliance, consent, why it’s so hard to ask for things, and why it’s so hard to say no.In this episode we talked about the power of persuasion. What You'll Learn:- Why you have more influence than you realise- Why people’s perception of you differs from what you imagine- How to make requests without creating pressure or discomfort- Why people’s default response is often “yes.”- Why asking for what you need feels difficult – and how to make it easierIn This Episode:00:00 - Introduction 10:46 - You Have More Influence Thank You Think 13:54 - Why It’s So Hard to Ask for Things 16:38 - Why It’s So Hard to Say No20:34 - How Much Do People Really Think About You?22:23 - What You Think They Think – They Don’t25:11 - How People Perceive You Isn’t What You Expect32:25 - How to Ask Without Pressure36:44 - In person vs online 41:49 - Why Offering Money Can Backfire57:33 - People’s Default Is to Say YesWe hope you enjoy it! ———————Vanessa Bohns: - Website: https://www.vanessabohns.com/- X: @profbohns- Instagram: @profbohns- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/vanessa-bohns-33219710/ Recommended books: - How To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie - Influence by Robert Cialdini - To Sell Is Human by Daniel Pink: https://youtu.be/8eJBKu8GmW8?si=5rlCed3Tht0pbr3e - The Power of Saying No by Vanessa Patrick: https://youtu.be/SCpllRISS00?si=VbGqCnZZnoxVJt83  - Reinforcements by Heidi Grant Halvorson- Give and Take by Adam Grant ———————IDEAS ON STAGE RESOURCES - Books: ‘Confident Presenter’ (https://www.ideasonstage.com/resources/confident-presenter-book/) and ‘Business Presentation Revolution’ (https://www.ideasonstage.com/business-presentation-revolution/book/)- The Confident Presenter Scorecard: https://ideasonstage.com/score  - Free Web Class: https://www.ideasonstage.com/uk/masterclass  - Free Mini-Course: https://bit.ly/confident-presenter-mini-course #IdeasOnStagePodcast #influence #persuasion