78. Grieving the Child You Imagined — While Loving the One in Front of You with Dr Vanessa LaPointe

There is a kind of grief that mums are not supposed to name. It could be called ungrateful.. but a lot of us feel it. So it stays private, carried quietly while life keeps moving and decisions keep getting made.This episode sits with the grief of the unlived motherhood — the version of parenting that was imagined, planned for, and socially rewarded, and then slowly dismantled by reality. Not because the mum did anything wrong, but because parenting did not arrive as promised, and the cost of adjusting was absorbed almost entirely by her.In This Episode, We Cover– Realising the life you planned no longer fits– Changing schools, routines, and priorities without calling it loss– Supporting children while privately missing your old life– Being told to be grateful while something keeps breaking– Noticing the grief surface long after the decision is made– Carrying expectations that don’t match daily realityThis Episode Is For You If– Mornings don’t look how you thought they would– Your days are built around needs you didn’t anticipate– You’ve adjusted plans more times than you can count– You support your family while missing parts of yourself– You’re functioning, but something feels quietly unfinishedRelated EpisodesYou Were the Good Girl. That’s Why You’re Falling Apart Now.https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-35-you-were-the-good-girl-thats-why-youre-falling-apart-now/Curated Related LinksThe Orchid and the Dandelion — Thomas Boycehttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25614459-the-orchid-and-the-dandelionDr. Vanessa LaPointe — Official Websitehttps://drvanessalapointe.comThe Unlived Life of the Parent — Carl Jung (concept reference)https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201112/the-unlived-lifeThe Work — Byron Katiehttps://thework.comThis isn’t weakness.This is adaptation under pressure.Mums are doing impossible things every day — and still standing.