81: Eight Years Sober, and So Much More

Eight Years Sober, and So Much More This episode is a very unique Becoming Bulletproof episode. I discuss a special day that signifies 8 years of sobriety and open up about the events in my life that led to each of my compensatory addictions. I share my journey and how it was shaped internally and externally, how I hurt the ones I loved along the way, and the specific moments that led up to me finally deciding to get help.Listen to this episode if you are struggling with anything in the current state of the world, learn how to find compassion and love for yourself no matter what you have been through, and how to make the commitment to yourself to show up, choose the wilderness, and do the work every single day—because you deserve joy. Where it all started I start this episode sharing a story about the first time I drank, how I was 15 years old and wound up not remembering anything from the night. I share the events that led up to my engagement, how I thought getting married and moving away would fix it all—and how wrong I was. For my family I discuss the behaviors that were modeled to me by my own parents, and the movie that wrapped up my past and future, how it paralyzed me but left me with nowhere to turn and no way out. Three years later my daughter was born, and I delve into how my eating habits and addiction worsened as my family grew. I describe the pivotal moment when my daughter was 4 years old that changed my life forever, and the long journey to get help that followed. The journey ahead Looking back on the past 8 years, I share the moments I struggled without the tools I needed. I talk about how true recovery happens with willingness to acknowledge your own part in it and take ownership in order to make sense of the puzzle that is your life. I offer advice on how to step into the wilderness and be aware of your spiritual condition, be committed to working on it, and stop giving into anxieties of the future and past so that you can live in the present with the joy you deserve.Quotes:2:49Nature vs nurture is a real thing.12:01We do what we are modeled, taught, and told.18:41The desire to drink wasn't there but the desire to not feel was.22:34Just because we change our minds doesn't mean we didn't feel that strong back then.22:41When we know better, we do better; when we grow, we evolve.30:50Acknowledgement—it’s like the wilderness right, and recovery is the holy grail.34:45The good thing about taking ownership, is that nobody can take it from us.35:33Vulnerability is the superpower of all great things.42:59I see all the beautiful parts of you that you're hiding under the shame, that you're hiding under things that don't serve you.45:53Personal development is just recovery in a lot of ways.46:02What we have is a daily reprieve that is contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.