84 - Nobody Is Asking You the Right Questions

Most business coaching falls into one of two camps. Hustle culture: scale faster, push harder, your only limit is your mindset. Affirmation culture: you're amazing, you've got this, here's your permission slip. Neither one asks the hard question. And for established owners who have already done the work of building something real, neither one is actually enough. In this episode, Kari gets honest about the gap she sees in the coaching and leadership development space, why the hardest person to lead in your business is you, and what it actually looks like when someone asks the question that makes you go quiet for ten seconds before you answer. That pause? That's where the real work happens. Key Topics Discussed: The Two Dominant Coaching Styles (and Their Limits) Kari breaks down what she sees as the two most common approaches in the coaching space: hustle culture and affirmation culture. Why “More” Isn’t Always the Right Answer For owners past the startup phase, the challenge is rarely effort or discipline. The real question becomes: Am I focused on the right thing? Kari highlights how few frameworks actually pause long enough to ask this and why that gap matters. The Power of the Right Question (and the Silence That Follows) The most impactful coaching doesn’t come from giving answers, it comes from asking the kind of question that makes someone stop and think. Kari explains why that 10–20 second pause is not a problem to fix, but a signal that someone is accessing deeper clarity. The Hardest Person to Lead Is You Leadership isn’t just about managing a team or improving communication. Kari challenges listeners to look inward- at patterns, habits, and decisions that are often running on autopilot.  A Real Example of Misaligned Growth Through a client story, Kari illustrates how a strong, logical growth strategy can still be the wrong decision if it doesn’t align with the life the owner is trying to build. Practical Ways to Create Better Thinking Space This isn’t about overanalyzing everything. Kari shares simple, practical shifts: taking a breath before responding, allowing silence in conversations, using open-ended “what” questions, and resisting the urge to jump in with answers too quickly. If you’ve been feeling like the usual advice (work harder, think bigger, stay positive) isn’t quite enough anymore, this episode offers a different perspective. Not more tactics, not more validation, but a deeper level of reflection. The kind that changes how you lead, how you decide, and ultimately how your business supports your life.   Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify - start building a business that works for you, not just because of you. Find the hours you didn't know you were losing and get the Time Leak Toolkit:  https://kari-lotzien.mykajabi.com/pl/2148756811. For capable, experienced business owners who are always busy but never feel caught up. You want to know exactly where your time is disappearing and more importantly how you can get it back.  Work with Kari:  Anchored Leadership Academy Private Business and Leadership Coaching Contact Kari Lotzien | Be the Anchor:  Website: BeTheAnchor.ca Facebook: BeTheAnchorLtd Instagram: BeTheAnchor.ca Linked In: Kari Lotzien Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.