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86: This Week in Ryans episode artwork

Mar 27, 2017 48 min

86: This Week in Ryans

from Dear Hank & John

Do taller people have bigger organs? Are more expensive clothes actually better? Is there a secular way to say you're "praying" for someone? And more! Email us: [email protected] If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at [email protected]. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn

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86: This Week in Ryans

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Hey, so something worth knowing is a benefit for the nonprofit organization that makes Crash Course and SciShow Complexly. It's September 16th, 2026 in Los Angeles, California at the Wilshire Ebell Theater. Please join us. It's going to be incredible.

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Tickets go on sale to the general public June 30th at somethingworthknowing.com. So come build a better world with us on September 16th and experience something worth knowing you can get your ticket at Complexly.info slash something. Hey John, we have an announcement. That's right, it's a special call to open to announce that over at our Patreon Patreon.com slash Dear Hank and John where you can go to directly support this podcast and also the other things that Complexly does.

Yeah. Online video educational projects. If you donate at $5 a month or more, you will get access to a new secret very brief podcast called This Week in Ryan's. That's right, every week a brief five to 10 minute podcast about a different Ryan every week forever.

Every week forever. There's a lot of Ryan's John. There's people with the first name Ryan, there's people with the last name Ryan, there's places called Ryan, there's things called Ryan and we're gonna talk about all of them over the course of the next 30 years of our lives. And it's gonna be available as $5 Patreon perk at patreon.com slash Dear Hank and John.

And you might be asking yourself, Dear fan of the pod, do you really need money to do Dear Hank and John? Well, let me tell you something. No, we don't. In fact, in fact, that money is going to be going into a production company, which is where all of the Patreon money so far has been going, where we use it to do things like SciShow and Crash Course and Healthcare triage and Sexplanations and the financial diet and a bunch of other things that we do at our production company.

So this is just kind of a way to help us pay the bills on our other other, just it's all part of the same family of content. And it all goes into the same pot where we try and make money to pay for the bills. We want to make educational video and we also want to make this week in Ryan's and so it lines up nicely with our interests. So if you're interested, please head over to patreon.com slash Dear Hank and John.

Thanks everybody who supported our podcast Over the Year. And thanks also to everybody who's about to start listening to this week in Ryan's. We're very excited about it. We're going to make this week's This Week in Ryan available for free at the end of this podcast so you can get a sweet, sweet taste of the silliness that is to come.

Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John. There's that first thing with Dear John and Hank. It's a comedy podcast where me and that guy, he's my brother John. We answer your questions, give you a advice and bring you all the weeks news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon.

Hey John, how you doing? I'm doing all right Hank. Things are good. There's a little bit of work stress in our lives right now.

But other than that, I'm great. Yeah, yeah. I was trying to come up with a thing to have happened to me this week, but it's all boring and it's all meetings. We're doing the yearly evaluations of all the people at the company where it's not evaluations.

It's sort of like a check-in and so all the people who report to me. Let's have our check-in and then we talk about how their jobs are and how they like it and how things are going and it's great. But it's a lot of people. And I'm happy that I do it, but then also it's like, oh, that's a new thing to add to the list of things.

But yeah. I'm not very good Hank as you know at meetings or check-ins. I kind of designed my life around the idea that I was never going to have to go to a meeting because I find meetings to be a form of oppression. And also when I am in a meeting, my friends and coworkers can attest to this.

I like shake somewhat violently and roll my eyes and mutter to myself and frequently will whisper quietly, has this meeting reached its conclusion. I just find it to be extraordinarily inefficient. That said, I understand that everyone in the world but me sees value in meetings. So I am almost definitely wrong, except I still kind of think that I'm right.

I mean, you are definitely kind of right. There's definitely inefficiencies to meetings. But also there's no other way for humans to talk to each other about the things that they have to do then to schedule it sometimes. So my life has lots of meetings in it, John.

That's who I have become. And I take most of the bullets for you in terms of meetings. So just appreciate me. I know.

And I do. I deeply appreciate that. I just want to pause and say, Hank, thank you for attending so many meetings on my behalf. Okay.

Do you ever start home for us this week? I don't know. I've been in too many meetings. I haven't even read any poetry this week.

It's a darkness. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Okay.

Well, good bye yellow brick road where the dogs of society howl. You can't plant me in your penthouse. Going back to my plow. That's by Elton John.

That's a good one. We should have you do this every week. Should we answer some questions from our listeners? Okay.

This one's from Allison. That's a really good open, John. We did a really good job. Since we've got Allison who asked, we killed it.

It's like, man, that meeting conversation was hilarious. Allison asks dear Hank and John, I'm always confused of how to respond when someone compliments the outfit I'm wearing. If they say, that looks nice on you, I always say thank you. But what if they're to say, like, I like your shirt.

I didn't make this shirt. I just bought it. Are they complimenting me on purchasing a cute shirt? Should I respond with?

I think so too. Though it seems self contract, though it seems self-congratulatory. I've been pondering this for years. Can you help?

Allison. I can. Can you, John? No.

So I guess I'm going to count on you for this one. The only thing, it's so nice to have been alive for 36 years so that I can have answers when people do what I consider to be a bit loony things like this. You say, I got it at the gap. That's what you say.

Like, it's a little bit like if somebody is like, oh, that, like, how's your pasta? Oh, no, no, I strongly disagree. I strong like if somebody says to me, oh, I like your suit. The correct answer is not, I got it at Burberry.

That is the wrong answer. I think that's what they're asking. They're, it's a way of asking like where did you go? No, they're not.

They're trying to make polite conversation and you are inserting a brand into a conversation that needs your brand. I think, like, that is the only thing I figured out what to say when somebody says, I like your shirt. I say, or I say, like, my wife got it for me. I'd like tell the story of the shirt.

And because there's nothing else to say, what else is there to say? You could say thank you. I think you can just say thank you because they are ultimately complimenting you on doing a nice job of picking out a shirt for today. I do.

Yes. I guess that's correct. And even like the bold fashion choices you have made. Like look at that.

Look at that. Contrasty plan. You have chosen for your cute shirt. You know what I actually find, Hank?

I find that in general when I tell people that I like their shirt or that I like their dresser or that I like their suit, what I actually mean is unlike the vast majority of times, I notice your shirt. I was aware that it existed. Where has usually, I don't actually like it. Like in all probability, I think that it's a little over the top, but I did notice it.

And so I kind of have to say something because it's what I'm thinking about right now. Right. Exactly. So is it a bad sign?

If somebody says that they like your shirt, should you retire that shirt? I think you might have to say, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I distracted you. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that I forced you to notice my shirt. That was not nice of me. I think you're right. I think we came to a really good conclusion on this one.

Alison, stop. Stop wearing that shirt. Oh, God. I'm so glad we were able to wrap that one up quickly.

So basically anytime somebody gives you a compliment, just respond by saying, I'm sorry. Okay. Our next question comes from Tyler. Tyler writes, Dear John and Hank, I'm an atheist and recently I've become a bit frustrated at something concerning English.

I'm finding that there's no good secular alternative to saying I'm praying for you in English. This came up when a friend of mine was having a lot of anxiety issues. I don't want to tell them I'd be praying for them since I'd be lying. Yet for some reason, I'm always unsatisfied with saying, I hope things get better.

Has that just doesn't seem to have the same weight? No. Is there a better alternative that I'm not thinking of? Or am I just overthinking this whole thing, Memento Morrie Tyler?

So Hank, you and I will have very different answers for this question, but I do not think that you have to believe in God to pray for someone or to pray. So that's my answer. Well, yes. So do you have to think that the prayer does anything for it to be a prayer?

Oh, I think, yeah, probably. Probably. But yeah, I guess so. Because that's like, that's the thing that like, it's not like a linguistic problem.

It's a practical problem where there's like, I'm jealous of the phrase I'm praying for you and I'm incapable of using it. Honestly, because I'm praying for you, indicates like, I am not just thinking about you. I'm trying to do something for you. I'm trying to have an effect on this situation with through my understanding of the universe and how it works.

And so I can say, you're in my thoughts or like, I've been thinking about you a lot or you've been on my mind. That kind of thing is sort of the secular equivalent. These people are in our thoughts. And you just leave out the prayers, part of in our thoughts and prayers.

So yeah, it's not a linguistic problem. It's a practical problem that you don't think that you can have a thought that will affect the ultimate outcome. But in just in saying that you are trying to have an effect, you kind of are. And so it's kind of a shame that we don't have a thing that we can say that feels honest.

Well, I think thinking of you does feel honest and maybe does help. I think maybe it does help. But yeah, I hear you on this being a challenge. And one that frankly, I'm very glad not to have.

Yeah, how about we answer this question from Ryan, Hank? I want to answer this question from Ryan mostly because he literally sent it in an image of his driver's license to prove that he is a Ryan. I mean, is it worth it? I think it's a good question.

Oh, yeah, it is. It's a great question. I'm really interested in this question. It's a hard one.

Great. Oh, it's from it. He says, dear, green brothers. In fact, he says, dear brothers green.

I'm a 26 year old military vet who lives in Charlotte County, Florida, which happens to be one of the most conservative and the oldest by media media age places in the country. Despite my surroundings, I consider myself deeply liberal. I've tried to make friends with neighbors and people in my community, but it is becoming unbelievably hard. Most are five decades, my senior or prone to saying things that are homophobic, racist, or Islamophobic.

I'm fully aware that most conservatives don't hold these views, but I unfortunately live in an area where it is a little too common because of all these factors. I do most of my socializing on the internet, but I feel that I'm missing out on an aspect of life not having any real-life friends. Any dubious advice would improve my situation. Any dubious advice that would improve my situation would be greatly appreciated.

I have to say, Ryan, I have spent time in Charlotte County, Florida, quite a lot. And I agree with you. It is an old conservative place. Where my in-laws live and oh, my, oh, my.

It is not full of a lot of young military veterans who sign off their emails, on our courage commitment. You forgot the great sign off. That's a good one. It's good.

You're right. I think it's difficult anytime you feel like there's nobody like you in your real life community. And that's a feeling that I knew very well when I was young, that I feel kind of lucky to not feel now. But I would say that just because there are a lot of old people in Charlotte County, Florida, it does not mean that there are no young people.

In fact, there are lots of young people. And I like, when I go, I'm amazed that I see like high schools. I'm like, who is having children in this town? There's people, there are people who are young people who have elementary school-aged children.

And I have no idea where they came from. Because when I walk around the town, I do not see those people, but they are there. So the question is, how do you meet them? Yeah.

Well, they mostly work in a hospital in one way or another. You know, they work in the care of the people who are the sort of weirdly enough of the industry of the town. So you just have to go. So Ryan, you got to go become a nurse.

Yeah. I think we found it. Or just like her yourself. I'm sorry when people compliment your clothes and become a nurse.

Yeah. Just like stub your toe real bad and like go into urgent care and like look around and be like, anybody want to be my friend? That is a much better idea. Why become a nurse when you could just become a patient?

So much easier. All right, Ryan, stub your toe. Go to urgent care. Nobody will think that's weird.

Be like, oh, my toe. Does anyone want to be my friend? They're so used to like drug-seeking patients, but you'll be that patient who's just friend-seeking. Yeah.

I do find it weird when I like see my doctor in real life. And I'm like, hey, oh, I just saw my psychiatrist in real life. Thank. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. It was incredibly uncomfortable. Thank God. He didn't actually see me because I dove under the table.

I was having a drink with my beautiful wife on day night. And who do I see striding up at a pretty good clip? And by the way, if my psychiatrist is listening to the pod, I don't know how involved he is in my private life, but please just like pause for 30 seconds. But yeah, I mean, who do I see striding up?

And I was like, Sarah, Sarah, that's Dr. Patel. And she was like, who? And I was like, Dr.

Patel. And she was like, go say hi. And I was like, say hi. No, no, this is, we are having a crisis.

This is an emergency. Yeah. Did you become okay? Yeah.

Well, he ended up having a drink in the same restaurant. So I just like turned my chair so that he couldn't see me. Yeah, I was fine. Everything chilled out after that.

Long story short, Ryan, get a psychiatrist and go out to bars and try to run across here. I don't think that we're doing a good job of answering this question. It is really hard to make friends and adulthood. Like, I still don't really know how to do it, Ryan.

And I think part of what's difficult about the time of your life is not just where you live or the kind of people you live near, but also that it's just kind of a hard time in life. Yeah, it is. I mean, I like finding it's weird because it's like, well, let's just find the places where people like you are going. But it's like, well, if people like me were going to places, I would be the people who go to those places.

Those places, like in the town where my in-laws live, there isn't a movie theater, like there isn't places to go do things. There are like the weird beach bars that I don't think are necessarily Ryan's scene. So yeah, I definitely, I commiserate with that and figure it like, again, it's like, why isn't there Tinder for friends? And it's because it's just too, like, it's too much.

It's too weird. You know, it has to be natural. And it's very hard to find natural ways to find folks outside of- I think for the record, there are some, there are tenders for friends and people do use them. But Hank and I are so far outside of that world that we are not going to be able to advise you on them.

I have no idea how you call someone through Tinder. I assume that there's some kind of like, Tender call functionality, but I'm not, I'm not hit with it in that world. All right. I think we have another question.

This one comes from Joseph who writes, Dear John and Hank, I was looking at clothes on the internet and my mother told me expensive doesn't mean better. And I was wondering if you agree because I haven't heard fashion advice on the pod yet and you're both fashion icons. Thank you for noticing, Joseph. Is a $3.97 cent grade t-shirt from Walmart as good as a $145 grade t-shirt from Ralph Lauren purple label?

I didn't even know that Ralph Lauren had a purple label. This is incredibly exciting news for me. I don't understand the extra expense. Should I spend more money buttons and threads, Joseph?

Now Hank and I are going to have very different answers here because Hank continues to shop for his clothing primarily secondhand. That's not true. I do both. That's why I said primarily.

Joseph, there are some people in the world who are not able to enjoy the finer things in life like my brother, you know, and you put him in one t-shirt and it's as good as any other t-shirt because to him, it's just the pleasure of not being naked and warm. That's all he cares about. But people like us, Joseph, we understand that when you pay $145 for a grade t-shirt, it is a really good t-shirt. No, I'm just kidding.

Never pay more than $22 push shipping for your t-shirts at dftba.com available right now. There it is. There it is. There it is.

There's no other place to get t-shirts on the internet that's even worth pursuing. Did Joseph I say, first of all, you haven't heard fashion advice on the pod. We just gave some. So apparently this is fashion day.

Second, there is a difference between a $4 t-shirt and $150 t-shirts. And the thing is, there's definitely more value. It's just that there's not $140 more value. That's the weird thing about luxury products is you keep making it better until for every increment of better, you are getting the prices going way, way out of proportion to the increment of betterness.

And I've noticed this about people who have the opportunity to do this, that people start to become experts on excellence. And so they can tell the difference between a $100 t-shirt and $150 t-shirt in a way that to me or indeed anyone else, except for the 5,000 people who buy t-shirts like this, is just completely obtuse and makes no sense. But there is a difference. And there's lots of differences when it comes to, I mean, I'm not a merch company.

So there's softness. But there's also things like, was the cotton sustainably raised? Are the factories where people are treated well? Was it made in America or was it made in a place where there isn't a lot of oversight?

And so like there are differences. But that's not the difference between a $25 t-shirt and $150 t-shirt. You can get a $25 t-shirt that was made in the US with Sustainably Produced Cotton. When you're paying $150 for a t-shirt, you're paying $150 for a luxury experience that, and I totally agree with you Hank, there's this, Sarah and I always talk about this great line that Ira Glass, the host of This American Life had after he moved to New York.

He said, it's three times as expensive, but only twice as fun. Yeah, that's definitely the t-shirt experience. That t-shirt is 10 times as expensive and only like 1.3 times better. Right, it's the same thing with red wine or stereo equipment or any number of things that you can get really, really into if you want to devote a lot of your resources to it.

Yeah, but I agree with Hank that when you stop noticing the difference in quality and when it stops being material to your quality of life, you should stop trying to differentiate. Yeah, don't try to figure out why something is better. Don't dedicate your time to figuring out why you should be spending more money on something. Definitely live in that ignorance for as long as you can.

Yeah, I agree, Hank, why don't I let you ask a question? Yeah, that's nice. Thank you. This one is from Natalie who asks, Dear Hank and John, I have a problem this morning.

I bought a bag of popcorn for exactly two dollars and nine cents. I paid in cash, so I was expecting to receive a penny. However, of course, I find pennies useless. So I was planning in advance to place that penny in the donations box next to the register.

The problem is that cashier did not give me my penny. She didn't even ask if I wanted the change. She simply said, have a nice day and close the register. I didn't know what to say.

So I just walked away penniless. I mean, that's not the, I feel like that's the literal definition of penniless, but not really what we mean when we say that. I don't know how to feel about this. I didn't particularly want the penny, but I also feel like I was owed the penny.

Did this shop just steal from me and buy extension from charity? Should I be upset that I was not giving the money or should I just go on with life since pennies are so useless anyway? Ave ate k valet Natalie. It says, Hey, it's hail and farewell in Latin.

That's good. It's from an elegic poem by the Roman poet, Catalyse. Oh, good. Good.

Good. It's addressed to Catalyse's dead brother or strictly speaking to the ashes of Catalyse's dead brother. Yes, yes, I guess that makes sense. This happens to me frequently, John.

Has this happened to you? It has. And I do not believe that stores are under any obligation to carry any pennies. So it may be that they are refusing to engage with the penny as currency.

Yeah, I mean, Fred, like I think that this cashier might have thought that they were doing you a favor because who wants a frickin penny? I like technically the cashier should give you the penny and the cashier is probably trained to give you the penny. In fact, there sometimes there's like inventory that goes on and they count the change in the cash register and if it's not right then they can get in trouble. And but probably that not at that place if the person is so blasey about pennies.

But yeah, I almost considered a personal favor to not have to even think about the fact that the penny ever existed. Yeah, yeah, I mean, I would see this as a gift to you rather than taking a penny away from charity because PS that charity doesn't need a penny. It needs a dime or more. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll go read. All right, let's answer another question. This one comes from Ian who writes, Hello, green brothers, especially since the most recent election, I found it harder to find an independent news source. I often read through various subreddits that seem to be unbiased but also try to balance that with reading subreddits populated by the way after the right and also watch Philip DeFranco daily because I feel like he filters out a lot of stuff purely through research and cross checking.

How should I get my news without spending hours doing research and cross checking? I want to make sure I consider all sides without falling for fake news or unsubstantiated stories. No interesting sign off. Yeah.

So I've been doing an experiment the last few weeks where I read my local hometown newspaper, the Indianapolis Star and the Wall Street Journal and the New York Times and the Economist as well as the New Yorker. And it gives me a wide variety of news stories. I think a lot of what people cite as biased comes from the opinion pages of those newspapers, which are a really small portion of what they do. Like I think sometimes their reporting is wrong or it's incomplete, but I don't think that it's consistently biased.

Like I think if you read the New York Times or the Wall Street Journal or the Economist's coverage of Brazil or South Korea, you won't find it to be consistently biased and I think the same is mostly true of their US coverage. I think so I am a big believer in newspapers and news organizations when it comes to the actual gathering of news and the reporting of news. I think newspapers and news organizations that are well established do a better job of that than anyone else at the moment. I think when it comes to news analysis, which is a different thing and most of what Phil does is I think ultimately news analysis telling you kind of why the news matters or what's important about it.

I think traditional news companies don't do as good of a job. Although I think there are very good opinion columns at times in all of those newspapers and magazines and in many others. But I think that's what the internet is good at is news analysis. But I don't think it's I think the old line media companies are still pretty good at news gathering and news reporting.

Yeah, I think there's a very important distinction there. A lot of what we see on the internet is what's the scandal of the day and what is that what's my take me? What are some good takes on the scandal of the day? And the scandals are always things that have really sharply defined sides.

But maybe they often haven't been all the way worked out. They're stories in progress and so the people are having opinions about things that haven't been all the way understood yet. And so these tremendous big stories that are in progress of coming out, everybody's going to have lots of opinions about them and it's much easier to have your opinion be influenced by what you would like the world to be like. And a lot of what you see on the internet and also with things like the Daily Show is we're talking about how the news is covering the news, not about the news itself.

And the news becomes the news. The media, you're covering the media rather than covering what the media is covering. And the actual journalism stuff is hard and people like me and you and Phil DeFranco, don't do that. And the Daily Show also for the most part doesn't do that.

And if we just spend all our time ragging on them the times they get it wrong and talking about how these people are completely useless and don't do any good stuff because I can find these two examples of how they script up stories in the last year, it's like, well, but you're not trying to do that. No one else is trying to do that. You're just going after them when they get it wrong very occasionally when the vast majority of the reporting that gets done is good journalism. Even across the board, when you're talking about a more conservative paper like the Wall Street Journal or a more liberal paper at the New York Times, like the Wall Street Journal is going to talk about warming all the time.

But you will find that the journalism that gets done there for the most part overlaps. Like the people like the stories that are getting done, like they agree with each other. But like, but those those don't get sucked into the outrage cycle because there's agreed. Right.

That's what I would highlight is that there's a lot that goes in, I think, to being an informed person that the outrage cycle leaves out because it's either a very complicated story or because it's a story on which a lot of people agree. So if you look at the news right now, for instance, you know, we're not seeing a ton of reporting about Somalia, even though there's a famine there, we're not seeing a ton of reporting on the internet anyway about these huge corruption scandals that are ongoing in Brazil and now reaching outside of Brazil. And we're not seeing a ton of like coverage on the internet about many other international stories, but also national stories. I highlighted this in a video I made recently, but you know, we're not talking that much about the Federal Reserve's monetary policy, even though it has huge implications for all of us, because it's not a story that's easy to get outraged about.

It's not a story that's easy to take sides on. And so I think on those stories, which I would argue are actually like the bulk of stories when it comes to being an informed person, I think the news media does a relatively good job. And I also think that like local, for me, my local newspaper does a really good job keeping me informed about issues that are really relevant in some ways more relevant to my life, because they are local issues when it comes to the laws and regulations and leaders that affect my city and my state. That's not really important to my day to day life in a way that some of the larger conversations aren't.

So I agree with you. And I think we have to call the media out when they do a bad job of reporting, but we also need to celebrate when they do a good job. Yeah. And when you sit down with the newspaper and you read the stories, you're like, Oh, this was actually interesting and useful, and I had no idea that it existed, which is it also becomes in a way less scary.

Like I find the news to be really overwhelming and scary a lot of times right now. And I feel like what the heck is happening? Like this and a lot of it is true. Like we are not living in normal times in the United States politically or socially, and it's important to acknowledge that and it's important to be honest about that.

But at the same time, when I read stories, carefully reported stories and newspapers, I realize that, you know, we've always been living in strange times, or at least we've often been living in strange times. Yeah. I agree. I agree.

I would like to ask a question that I would like to answer, John. Okay. But you can also try to answer it if you want. It's from Stella, who asks, Dear Hank and John, I'm sorry if my English is horrible, but I'll try my best.

So I was wondering if there was any difference in organ or other things inside our body size and shape between the tallest person in the world and the shortest person in the world. I mean, like, do tall people's hearts and lungs? Are they like longer or the difference is just in the arrangement of the organs? Are tall people's insides more spacious and short people's insides denser organs and body parts Stella?

I mean, I don't know. Bodies are amazing. Like the fact that you can have a seven foot tall person and like a four foot tall person, or you know, like the differences and sizes of human bodies and even like crazier with dogs and stuff. Like these are the same species, but like there's chihuahuas and there's great things.

Like the body figures out how to make itself proportional no matter what size you are. And we're not entirely sure how that works. There's a lot of different stuff that goes into it. But yes, bigger people have bigger organs, smaller people have smaller organs.

Otherwise it would not fit inside. And that would be a tremendous problem. And also, yeah, there are no like empty spaces inside of tall people, which is good. I'm glad about that.

It would be real weird. But it's pretty cool. I kind of want there to be an empty space inside of me. Sometimes I feel like, you know, everybody has that feeling sometimes like there's an empty space inside of them that nothing can fill.

And it would be nice if that were literally true. If I could be like, oh, yeah, it's that it's that part between my lungs and my diaphragm. That's where the emptiness is. Yeah, nope.

You're pretty packed. A solid in there, John. We are all pretty packed solid. It's kind of remarkable.

You don't really want to look unless you're like, you know, doctrine. But it's pretty cool. Pretty cool. One of my central ambitions is never to see the inside of my abdominal cavity.

It's good. It's a good one to have. This episode of Dear Hank and John is brought to you by Shopify. There are a lot of things that stand between I have an idea.

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Head to factor meals.com slash deer hank 50 off and use the code deerhank50off to get 50% off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27th, 2026. See website for more details. Hank we need to get on to the news from Mars and AFC Wimbledon so that we can get to the all important Ryan part of the podcast. We've got to get to this week in Ryan which again you can get patreon.com slash deerhank and john you can sign up a new level and you can get a weekly Ryan podcast but let's get to the news from Mars and AFC Wimbledon and let's just start with the news from AFC Wimbledon Hank because it's awesome.

Oh good. It's awesome. It's wonderful. Hank on March 14th you don't come to a deerhank and john for it necessarily up to date AFC Wimbledon news.

On March 14th AFC Wimbledon welcomed to Kings Meadow the franchise currently playing its trade in Milton Keynes. It was a difficult and complex and emotionally exhausting thing to do to have to welcome the team that used to be or at least fancy themselves the team that used to be you and throughout the game AFC Wimbledon fans sang one of my all-time favorite songs Where Were You Where Were You When You Were Us and for the first time in league one AFC Wimbledon defeated the Milton Keynes team to nil a beautiful game really I listened to the whole thing on radio wdon because it was not on TV and oh man oh gosh it felt good I would like to say that I didn't care about the result because Wimbledon had already won by getting back to league one but actually I did I did care about the result and it was oh it felt good oh god it felt good. Oh good John I'm excited for you. So even more importantly that's the first time that's happened right it's the first time that it's happened in a league competition they lost they lost earlier so it was wild Taylor the messy for Montserrat who scored the second goal and helpfully I just want to give a quick shout out to wild Taylor because he was kind enough to celebrate right in front of our advertising hoarding that says the Nerdfighter community is helping AFC Wimbledon get it Wimbledon done and so that picture is in all of the newspapers in London so thank you Lyle Taylor for celebrating in front of our advertising I know that you did that on purpose and I appreciate it.

That is the dopest John. Also I should add one more thing since then AFC Wimbledon has drawn a game nil-nil and critically that means that with 38 games played with eight games left in the league one season AFC Wimbledon are on 51 points meaning that they are only one point from absolute definite safety so if Wimbledon just win or tie one of their last eight games they will almost definitely not get relegated so that's great Woohoo! What's the news for Mars? Well I guess the news for Mars is that President Trump signed a bill funding NASA it's kind of strange like it's not part of the budget it's just sort of like it's like it's a bipartisan support thing that's like here NASA you're gonna get funded and it didn't have any of the cuts to the Earth science departments that was in Trump's larger budget which is good news because like it's good for NASA to study the Earth because of how you know as Leon Musk will tell you it's a pretty good planet we need to try and keep it that way yep but part of that was helping to get NASA's big honk cash to help us get to Mars.

Elon Musk on the other hand the actual Elon Musk is not a fan of the bill he says this bill changes almost nothing about what NASA is doing existing programs stay in place and there is to be clear no added funding for Mars and it was sort of like pitched as like a this is gonna be but the Mars thing but you know on later tweeted perhaps there will be some future bill that makes a difference for Mars but this is not it. Well I'm glad that NASA has funding though because I do think that of the things that our government does NASA is probably the most beautiful it is pretty awesome it's pretty awesome followed closely by the Corporation for Public Broadcasting which partly funds the Articignment and Crash Course. Also very awesome also very awesome thanks um well Hank thank you for potting with me but before we go it's time for our brand new podcast this week in Ryan. This week in Ryan's we're fighting over who gets to say it.

It's gotta be me right you you're not that you're like sort of like the peripheral character of your Hank and John so it should probably be me right. This week in Ryan's. Alright John who is the Ryan this week? Well Hank we're starting out with the most famous Ryan in the world according to Ranker.com which lists uh.

Does Ranker wait Ranker ranks people by first name? Hank Rankers slogan is vote on everything including apparently your favorite Ryan's. Um so the most famous Ryan in the world according to Ranker.com is Ryan Gosling. That does not surprise me.

That is what I would have said. Now I'm very curious I'm curious who the most famous Hank is John. I have a weird name I have a weird name I'm probably I'm probably in the top five. The most famous Hank by far is Hank Williams.

Yes I think Hank is area may also be. It could be Hank it could it could be Hank Aaron could be Hank Hill who's not real but still. Let me real quick go to Ranker.com and tell you the most famous Hanks in the world. Number one Hank Azaria I don't know that this is a very good website.

Hank Azaria is pretty famous. He was married to Helen Hunt. Hank I've got some bad news. According to Ranker.com you are actually the 21st most famous Hank.

Oh what is the world the list? I'm on the list. You're behind Hank Brown who is a former US senator from Colorado. You're not even the most famous Hank with a color last name.

That would be Hank Brown or possibly if you consider snow to be a color hank snow who is a celebrated Canadian country music artist. Ah well John before we go down this rabbit hole any further what do we do about Ryan Gosling? Yeah Ryan Gosling of course famous for his recent role in La La Land but most famous for having a face that I love to look at. Can I just Google?

Let me just Google if I just Google Ryan Ab something I'm gonna put his last name in I'm gonna see it. Oh yeah that's a great idea. Just Ryan who's the first Ryan's ab that I say oh it's Ryan Locky it's Ryan Lockty. It's not even Ryan Gosling.

He's gonna be the star of a future episode of this week in Ryan. I am looking at Ryan Gosling's abs now though and I'm not disappointed. But moving on because of course Ryan Gosling is not only a beautiful face and an astonishingly fit pair of abs. Parabas?

Just do them. The only one that whittled in fact that Ryan Gosling is that he only has two abdominal muscles. Man Hank do you know what Ryan Gosling is from? Is he from Canada because he's a goose?

A small goose? He is from Canada. He is a Canadian actor and musician and you know how he got a start? He got a start on the Mickey Mouse Club.

Ah I thought that was an American thing. He was also on goosebumps. He was on goosebumps in his last name as Goose? His last name is Tiny Goose and he was on goosebumps.

He was on goosebumps. Oh my goodness he's from Canada. Where the goosebumps from? It was amazing.

His dad Thomas Ray Gosling was a traveling salesman for a paper mill and his mom was a secretary and is now a high school teacher. And one thing that you might not know about Ryan's great great grandfather, George Edward Gosling, is that he was English. That's not interesting. Hold on let me find something interesting.

Well IMDB will tell you the movies that they are most known for which I was always find interesting. I would have thought that La La Land would be number one but they have drive, then La La Land, then the big short, then crazy stupid love. I also want to know the movies he's least known for but probably it's Goosebumps and the Mickey Mouse Club. I don't know.

I mean I feel like I saw him in the Mickey Mouse Club a few times but then I do have small children and at this point we are very far down the Mickey Mouse rabbit hole. His first ever role was in 1995 in the TV series Are You Afraid of the Dark which I was probably watching in 1995. As Jamie Leary and Jamie Leary you can click on that because apparently it's a clickable thing. I got a quote from Jamie Leary he says that's my brother he's not dead.

What? I don't know that's the quote that they pulled out of the episode. Jamie Leary said that. I don't know why.

We're going to have to watch it John. It's an episode Are You Afraid of the Dark from 1995 called The Tale of Station 109.1. It's a haunted radio station. Hank do you know what Ryan Gosling's childhood nickname was?

Well his current nickname is Ryan Minigus Gosling. That's right but we're just we are only coining that now so obviously that wasn't his childhood nickname because when people look back on history and at some point like I think Ryan Gosling will probably stop like being Ryan in the movies and it'll just say you know starring Eva Mendez and Minigus Gosling. Yeah obviously. His childhood nickname was Trouble.

Ryan Trouble Gosling. When I look into his eyes I can see that he might be a person whose childhood nickname was Trouble. Well in first grade having been heavily influenced by the action film First Blood he took steak knives to school and threw them at other children during recess which led to his suspension. That was a bad idea.

Yeah right. Don't do that. Bad bad bad don't put that in your autobiography. Are you at all familiar with the singer-songwriter Ryan Cabrera?

Well John I feel like he's off limits. He's not off limits because wait for it. Ryan Cabrera noted singer-songwriter has a tattoo on his calf of Ryan Gosling. Wow.

Ryan's seption. I'm looking at it right now. It's Ryan's seption. Ryan Gosling also has tattoos of one of them he said one of my tattoos is supposed to be a monster's hand dropping a bloody heart but I did it myself with a tattoo kit so it looks like a cactus.

Oh man. And I'm looking at the tattoo right now and I mean it's not good. How can Ryan Gosling be so hot and so bad at getting tattoos? I mean this is the worst tattoo I've ever seen.

I mean it was. We'll put it up on the Patreon but oh my god this is the worst tattoo I have ever seen in my entire life. It looks like Beavis from Beavis and Budhead had a baby with a cactus that then spit out a heart. I'm looking forward to seeing a picture of this John.

I googled Ryan Gosling tattoo and I just got a lot of tattoos of Ryan Gosling not Ryan Gosling's tattoos. There are a number of them including this one which is a tattoo of Ryan Gosling's face super opposed on a spider and it says Ryan Gosling. It's really good. I like it a lot actually.

I'm gonna save that one for the picture as well. Well this John has been this week in Ryan's. We started out with the most famous Ryan of all the Ryan's Ryan Gosling at least for now and he's you know that Justin Timberlake's mom was Ryan Gosling's legal guardian for six months. What?

What? Did you know that Ryan Gosling called AJ McLean in the early 1990s to ask if he could join the Backstreet Boys? Wow. I mean did you know that there's a person who has a tattoo of Ryan Gosling except instead of Ryan Gosling's beard it's a pepperoni pizza?

David that one for the picture. Do you know that Ryan Gosling is in a band called Dead Men's Bones that only sing songs about paranormal phenomena? Wow. No.

That's wonderful. I like Ryan Gosling much more now than I did at the beginning of this this week in Ryan. I think at the end of each episode of This Week in Ryan Hank we should just pause and real quickly give a grade rating to Ryan that we have spent the last five to ten minutes meeting and I give Ryan Gosling based on my quick read of his Wikipedia page and some trivia and A-minus. No John we cannot just give them grades we have to give them a thing out of a thing like uh no I grade Ryan Gosling 62 mini-gooses.

It shouldn't be a consistent rating system though so the Ryan's the world can know whether or not they sack up against other Ryan's. No! Definitely not! No no we are not here to make Ryan's feel bad.

No we're here to make Ryan's feel good mostly I would think unless there's a I'm sure there's terrible Ryan's out there at some point we're gonna get to just go. There's some Ryan's. Rex Ryan. I don't know about that.

I think that's lovely. Point being we've got it we've got to think of a rating system but we haven't thought of one so we'll do that by next time because I have to go pick up my kid now. Okay well this has been Once Again this week in Ryan's. This week in Ryan's.

Thank you guys really competing to try to be the voice of this week in Ryan. I like it. I like it. I think that should be a thing.

Um John what did we learn today? Well we learned that Ryan Gosling is the most famous Ryan in the world and Hank Green is the 21st most famous Hank. We also learned that if someone compliments you on your shirt you really just need to apologize for your shirt. You've made a horrible mistake.

Horrible mistake. And of course we learned that this week's podcast for some reason didn't have the usual fake sponsors that we have. Nope no fake sponsors because it's brought to you by one Ryan's and to you our Patreon patrons and also the people who listen who aren't Patreon patrons which is also to be clear fine. Yes we're grateful to all of you.

And lastly we learned that you can pay 10 times more for his shirt but it will only be about 1.1 times better than the cheap one. That's a it depends on the exact context but I broadly agree with you. Thank you for potting with me. Thanks everybody for listening.

If you're Hank and John is produced by Rosie on Hall's Roadhouse and shared and gifts in our editors Nicholas Jenkins, Victoria's One Journal with our head of community and communications. Our music is by the great gunerola. You can email us at HankandJohnatgmail.com. You can find Hank on Twitter at HankBreen.

It's hard to find me on Twitter these days except it's Sports with John and Leon Musk number for Earth. Thanks again for listening and as we say in my hometown. Don't forget to be awesome.

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This episode was published on March 27, 2017.

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