EPISODE · May 21, 2026 · 31 MIN
A Perfectionist's Guide to Not Being Perfect
from Anxiety Matters
In this episode BZE and BZW talk about perfectionism through their own habits and experiences, from the pressure to make the “right” choice to the way rigid standards can show up in everyday life. They discuss BZE's book *A Perfectionist’s Guide to Not Being Perfect*, written for middle and high school readers, and how it was shaped by her writing routine and the disruptions of early 2020.They explore how perfectionism can lead to inflexibility, repeated checking, procrastination, and avoidance in school, work, and relationships. They also discuss treatment approaches that focus on flexibility, including exposure exercises, small acts of spontaneity, and learning to tolerate mistakes.The two then look at perfectionism in students and families, including test anxiety, social media, college decisions, and parental pressure. They close by emphasizing practical ways to respond to perfectionism, such as time limits for avoided tasks and reducing harsh self-criticism, with flexibility presented as more helpful than perfection.HIGHLIGHTS:3:06 Eye Exam Epiphany5:33 Writing Through Perfectionism8:43 Flexibility Over Control12:03 When Perfection Hurts13:21 Building Flexible Habits16:26 Social Media Pressure19:01 Success Beyond Grades23:27 Parenting Through Mistakes27:41 College Choices Matter Less30:05 Break the Avoidance Cyclementioned in the episode:A Perfectionist's Guide to Not Being Perfect by Bonnie (East): https://a.co/d/0ajFPyrpThe Obstacle is the Way book: https://a.co/d/01abU2GTCONNECT WITH THE BONNIE ZUCKERS:Bonnie Zucker Ph.D.(west)website: https://www.bonniezuckerphd.comNewsletter sign-up: https://bonnie-zucker-ph-d.kit.com/d44b57fcdfBooks by Bonnie West: https://a.co/d/04aNJFDZBonnie Zucker Psy.D. (east)website: https://www.bonniezuckerandassociates.comBooks by Bonnie East: https://shorturl.at/MxvRZThe content of Anxiety Matters Podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute mental health or medical advice, nor is it a substitute for professional mental health or medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are experiencing a mental health crisis, call emergency services or a local crisis line.
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A Perfectionist's Guide to Not Being Perfect
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