A Very Messy conversation with myself

This is a messy episode. I recorded this at the end of a very long day where i woke up at 2 am, drove an hour to an airport and then wore an itchy mask for ten hours to get to a place I am not sure I want to be in order to do one thing I want to do and feel conflicted about another thing I am not sure is going to happen or if I want it to happen if it does. I am in Georgia for an Ultra. I am in Georgia to maybe, finally, meet my mom. And maybe my maternal siblings. And also, the Ultra, which is put on by a group called Yeti Trail Runners and is called The Dark Anchor. If you have never done an endurance event-think about participating. Training to complete a marathon or an ultra or a century or, well, there are lots of options, teaches you a lot about yourself and about other people.