AMA: The Erotic Equation, Attraction, Obstacles & Dating Apps Have in Common, Red Flags, and Death of Curiosity in Dating

Matthew Case turns the mic on Brittani for a rapid-fire AMA episode, unpacking what's missing from the current dating and relationship advice landscape — and why attachment styles and red-flag culture might be doing more harm than good. The attachment style hyperfixation: Why reducing every dating dynamic to "anxious vs. avoidant" strips away nuance — and Jack Morin's "erotic equation" (attraction + obstacle = desire) as a better lens for understanding chemistry "We attract what we lack": How the same qualities that draw us to a partner can become the exact source of friction later on The dating coach blind spot: Why telling people who they should be attracted to rarely works — and what to do instead when you keep dating the same "type" Red flag fatigue: What we lose by hyperfocusing on red flags instead of green flags, and the "your red flag is my pink flag" problem Overcorrecting after a breakup: Why swinging to the opposite "type" often backfires — and how to tell if you're in a real relationship or just a reactive experiment The case against dating apps: Why they've shifted from "meeting people" to "curating a resume," and a reframe for using them without losing your mind Curiosity as a skill: Borrowing from motivational interviewing to ask better first-date questions — including a simple reframe of "do you want kids?" into an open-ended, story-driven conversation Millennial dating pressure: Why knowing what you don't want (thanks, parents' divorce rates) hasn't translated into knowing what you do want Acknowledgement: The sound is a bit off, and we appreciate your patience and understanding as technological issues occur.  Brittani's Resources Website: https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/ IG: https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow Intimacy Workbook: https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219 Newsletter: https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc ☕ Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. https://larryscoffee.com/relate