Anger

Hey beautiful! I'm so glad you're here. Today we're talking about anger. Specifically, how to handle it constructively. We've all been there—angry at something or someone. Whether it's a coworker who keeps taking credit for your work, or a sibling who borrowed your favorite sweater without asking and hasn't returned it yet… we've all been there! Sometimes it feels like the world is out to get you. Maybe someone cut you off in traffic and now you're late for work, or maybe your favorite team just lost the big game and now you have no reason to get up tomorrow. The world can be a hostile place, and sometimes it feels like there are no answers. But I have good news: there are answers! And they're inside of us! But what happens when you get angry? How do you deal with that anger? In this episode of Revelation we'll be talking about how to control your anger, how to recognize when you're feeling it, and how to make sure it doesn't control YOU. So let's begin with controlling your anger. So what does it mean to control your anger? Well, first of all, when we say "control," we're not talking about curbing or suppressing your feelings. That doesn't work for most people—and it definitely doesn't work for me! Instead, when we talk about controlling your anger, we mean learning how to manage what happens when you get angry so that you don't lose control and hurt yourself or others by acting out on your anger inappropriately in ways that cause harm or damage. Now that we've got that out of the way—how do you manage your anger? Well first off: try not getting angry in the first place! It sounds obvious but, well, we know it's hard. Anger is a natural part of life, but it can also be very overwhelming. Maybe you're dealing with a stressful situation at work, or maybe your boss is driving you crazy and making you feel totally out of control. Or maybe your partner just said something that made your blood boil; whatever the case may be, here are some tips for controlling your anger: -Take deep breaths. When we're angry, our bodies tend to react by speeding up our heart rate and making us breathe faster and more shallowly. Taking deep breaths will help slow down these reactions so that they don't make us feel even more out of control than we already do. -Take time to calm down before reacting. If someone has provoked you into feeling angry, try counting backwards from 10 before responding—it'll give you a moment to calm down and think about how best to respond. -Practice mindfulness exercises like meditation, yoga, or walking outside in nature (or even just taking a few minutes each day to close your eyes and focus on your breath). These activities will help train your brain so that it doesn't default immediately. So it can be easy to miss your anger, especially if you're not used to feeling it. We're going to take a look at some of the ways that anger shows up in our bodies, minds, and feelings. So first, let's talk about what anger feels like in the body. It can feel like heat or pressure in your chest or throat—like a burning sensation. Anger can make your heart race and your breath quicken. It can also make you feel tense in your muscles, like you're tensing up for a fight or flight response. And sometimes people say they feel their face get red when they're angry, which is actually pretty common! Next up: How anger shows up in the mind. Anger can make us feel defensive—like we need to protect ourselves from whatever is making us mad. If someone says something that hurts our feelings or threatens our sense of self-worth, we might react with aggression because our brain wants to protect us from being hurt again. And finally: How anger shows up as feelings inside of us. Some people describe feeling angry as "feeling raw," like their emotions are unbridled. Recognize that anger isn't always about the situation—it may also be about something else going on in your life that's unrelated! If so, find a way to deal with that other st