Are You “Doing the Work” or Just Performing It? with Therapist Rebecca Marcus

Therapist Rebecca Marcus, LCSW, is back to talk about what it actually means to “do the work” in your love life. We unpack why awareness alone isn’t enough to break old patterns, how to tell the difference between real growth and just performing self-improvement, what to do if you’re doing everything “right” but still feel lonely, and whether it’s possible to over-communicate to the point it kills the spark. Rebecca also shares how she met her husband through a matchmaking platform and the advice she got back when she was looking for love. Follow Rebecca on Instagram @rm.psychotherapy and visit rmpsychotherapy.com if you're interested in working with Rebecca or joining one of her dating and breakup groups!ALL links here (dating coaching, profile revamp, marathon fundraiser, and more!) Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEStock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get 25% Off @CowboyColostrum with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE at www.cowboycolostrum.com. #CowboyColostrumPod Your mental health matters. Head to rula.com/seeingotherpeople to connect with a licensed therapist who truly caresStart your guilt-free journey with the Good Habit. Use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get a free gift with purchase at tryfum.com/SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE.If you’re thinking about pregnancy or already on that journey, don’t settle for less than evidence-based support. My listeners get early access to Ritual’s Black Friday sale — 40% off your first month at Ritual.com/SEEINGOTHERPEOPLESee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What this episode covers

Therapist Rebecca Marcus, LCSW, is back to talk about what it actually means to “do the work” in your love life. We unpack why awareness alone isn’t enough to break old patterns, how to tell the difference between real growth and just performing self-improvement, what to do if you’re doing everything “right” but still feel lonely, and whether it’s possible to over-communicate to the point it kills the spark. Rebecca also shares how she met her husband through a matchmaking platform and the advice she got back when she was looking for love. Follow Rebecca on Instagram @rm.psychotherapy and visit rmpsychotherapy.com if you're interested in working with Rebecca or joining one of her dating and breakup groups!ALL links here (dating coaching, profile revamp, marathon fundraiser, and more!) Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEStock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get 25% Off @CowboyColostrum with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE at www.cowboycolostrum.com. #CowboyColostrumPod Your mental health matters. Head to rula.com/seeingotherpeople to connect with a licensed therapist who truly caresStart your guilt-free journey with the Good Habit. Use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get a free gift with purchase at tryfum.com/SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE.If you’re thinking about pregnancy or already on that journey, don’t settle for less than evidence-based support. My listeners get early access to Ritual’s Black Friday sale — 40% off your first month at Ritual.com/SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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This episode is 47 minutes long.

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This episode was published on November 18, 2025.

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