Ask Me Anything – E48: Why Choosing Yourself Feels Like Losing Everyone (And What to Do When It Does) episode artwork

EPISODE · May 13, 2026 · 8 MIN

Ask Me Anything – E48: Why Choosing Yourself Feels Like Losing Everyone (And What to Do When It Does)

from Untethering Shame · host Kyira Wackett

★ Join the Energy Audit: A free seven day email challenge starting May 24th to help you identify what is draining you and what is restoring you. https://adversityrising.com/the-energy-auditIn this episode, I respond to a question from an anonymous listener who writes:"I finally started putting myself first. Boundaries, saying no, protecting my time. And instead of feeling better, I feel worse. My relationships are tense. People are pulling away or frustrated. Now I'm wondering if this whole taking care of myself thing is just selfish. How do I deal with the fallout of finally choosing myself?"We look at the concept of "Unspoken Contracts" and why setting healthy boundaries often leads to friction rather than immediate relief. This conversation examines how systems push back when you change your role and why choosing yourself is not the same as being selfish.Inside This EpisodeDisrupted Systems: Why things getting harder does not mean you are doing something wrong.Unspoken Contracts: The invisible agreements in your relationships and what happens when you stop honoring them.The Shame Spiral: How shame disguises itself as conscience to make you feel bad for growing.Navigating the Fallout: The three typical responses to change (resistance, negotiation, and exit) and how to tolerate the discomfort of holding your ground.If you have ever felt guilty for setting a boundary or worried that taking care of yourself is ruining your relationships, this episode will help you renegotiate your connections with radical responsibility.📝 Want to submit a question for a future episode?Nothing is off-limits (well, almost nothing).Submit your question anonymously or with your name; whatever feels safest for you.👉 Submit Here: https://forms.gle/1uYJ87Y2Vag6KYCeA💬 If this

★ Join the Energy Audit: A free seven day email challenge starting May 24th to help you identify what is draining you and what is restoring you. https://adversityrising.com/the-energy-auditIn this episode, I respond to a question from an anonymous listener who writes:"I finally started putting myself first. Boundaries, saying no, protecting my time. And instead of feeling better, I feel worse. My relationships are tense. People are pulling away or frustrated. Now I'm wondering if this whole taking care of myself thing is just selfish. How do I deal with the fallout of finally choosing myself?"We look at the concept of "Unspoken Contracts" and why setting healthy boundaries often leads to friction rather than immediate relief. This conversation examines how systems push back when you change your role and why choosing yourself is not the same as being selfish.Inside This EpisodeDisrupted Systems: Why things getting harder does not mean you are doing something wrong.Unspoken Contracts: The invisible agreements in your relationships and what happens when you stop honoring them.The Shame Spiral: How shame disguises itself as conscience to make you feel bad for growing.Navigating the Fallout: The three typical responses to change (resistance, negotiation, and exit) and how to tolerate the discomfort of holding your ground.If you have ever felt guilty for setting a boundary or worried that taking care of yourself is ruining your relationships, this episode will help you renegotiate your connections with radical responsibility.📝 Want to submit a question for a future episode?Nothing is off-limits (well, almost nothing).Submit your question anonymously or with your name; whatever feels safest for you.👉 Submit Here: https://forms.gle/1uYJ87Y2Vag6KYCeA💬 If this

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Ask Me Anything – E48: Why Choosing Yourself Feels Like Losing Everyone (And What to Do When It Does)

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The Progressive Couple Podcast The Progressive Couple You’re listening to The Progressive Couple Podcast and we’re the Progressive Couple!We’re here to share our stories and reduce the amount of shame people internalize and experience about being in relationships that are dysfunctional. We’re here to challenge societal norms when it comes to relationships. We’re also here to model a new way or “our way” of being in relationship to help others get creative and live a playful life. Join us on our adventure as we explore topics on intimacy, sexuality, relationship anarchy, non-monogamy, conscious parenting and so much more! Explicit For Fox Sake Vee Weir For Fox Sake is a personal finance podcast focused on helping you navigate late-stage capitalism through sustainable budgeting and realistic financial education. We actively deconstruct shame, share relatable finance stories, and discuss financial literacy in a way that makes sense for a 2024 world.• 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐞𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲• REAL personal finance education• Follow Vee on Instagram, YouTube + Threads: @veefrugalfox Explicit Happy Abundant Hippies Hanan Vazanio The Happy Abundant Hippies podcast to intended to teach and connect with like-minded spiritual and enlightened entrepreneurs, creatives, and co-creators who want to harness the power of their mind, the law of attraction, and their energy to create the life of their dreams.Hi! My name is Hanan Vazanio - I'm the Happy Rich Hippie! I’m a mindset and manifestation coach, a dog mom, and a lover of spirituality, business, entrepreneurship, and self-growth. I want you to know that there is power in your mind and your thoughts. I share with you the steps, techniques, and actions I took to change my life from depressing to fulfilling! I teach you how to achieve success and reduce negative thinking, guilt, shame, and worry about you future by taking control of your thoughts, beliefs, and habits.If you’re looking to make a massive change in your life, this space is for YOU! :) Explicit Shed the Shame with Jenny Whitens Jenny Whitens Welcome to Shed the Shame - a podcast for women looking for inspiration on how to take and make time for themselves to be their best without the shame of doing so. Host Jenny Whitens puts into perspective the importance of taking time for yourself to be healthy in body, mind, and soul so you can truly model health and happiness for yourself, your friends, and your family and live a life of fulfillment. Seeking a healthier and more joyful life? Hungry for tips on reenergizing, reevaluating, and resetting so you can feel like YOU again? Then it’s time to Shed the Shame and make yourself a priority - and you can start with this podcast. Explicit

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This episode is 8 minutes long.

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This episode was published on May 13, 2026.

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★ Join the Energy Audit: A free seven day email challenge starting May 24th to help you identify what is draining you and what is restoring you. https://adversityrising.com/the-energy-auditIn this episode, I respond to a question from an anonymous...

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