Being Pretty Does Not Mean I’m Soft

In this conversation, I talk about the assumptions people make based on appearance, why being disarming has caused people to underestimate me, and how I learned to command my own power differently as I got older. I reflect on growing up in New York, being a teenager in the 90s, the influence of hip-hop culture, the way my parents raised me to speak and carry myself, and the lessons my mother gave me about beauty and intelligence. I also talk about college, discovering that I was much smarter than I had been led to believe, deliberately surrounding myself with people who wanted to succeed, and why I believe life experience can sometimes make education far more valuable. At the center of the conversation is one lesson: Beauty can be part of who you are without being the most important thing you bring into the room. My beauty is the bonus.