Being vs Doing: Why Men Need Affirmation for Who They Are episode artwork

EPISODE · Sep 16, 2025 · 13 MIN

Being vs Doing: Why Men Need Affirmation for Who They Are

from The Men's Collective · host Travis Goodman, LMFT

In this episode of The Men’s Collective Podcast, we unpack the difference between being vs. doing—and why most men are praised for achievement, performance, and success instead of who they truly are. Travis explores how this performance-based identity can lead to shame, loneliness, and disconnection, and shares research (including Brene Brown) plus real coaching insights to show why affirming character and core values builds stronger confidence and connection.  What You’ll Learn: - Being vs. Doing: Why most men are praised for achievements instead of character - Performance-Based Identity: How tying self-worth to success leads to shame, loneliness, and burnout - Masculinity & Mental Health: Research on traditional masculinity norms and their impact on connection - Affirmations That Matter: Why affirming compassion, resilience, and courage builds lasting confidence - Practical Challenge: Write & share three affirmations about who you are—and three for people you love - Real-Life Stories & Research: Insights from Brene Brown, Therese Norden, and coaching work with men  Challenge for the Week: Write three affirmations you’d love someone to say about your character—and share three affirmations with people close to you. Notice how it shifts your connection.🎧 Listen now on Spotify, Apple, & YouTube or visit menscollective.co to go deeper.JOIN THE COLLECTIVE: JOIN THE MEN'S COLLECTIVE: CLICK HEREJOIN THE MAILING LIST & GET INVOLVED! CLICK HERE: MAILING LISTINSTAGRAM: MENSCOLLECTIVE.CO WATCH ON YOUTUBE: WATCH HEREConnect and Support Travis: YouTube: Travis Goodman Instagram: @travis.goodman.lmft Web: TravisGoodmanLMFT.com

In this episode of The Men's Collective Podcast, we unpack the difference between being vs. doing—and why most men are praised for achievement, performance, and success instead of who they truly are. Travis explores how this performance-based identity can lead to shame, loneliness, and disconnection, and shares research (including Brene Brown) plus real coaching insights to show why affirming character and core values builds stronger confidence and connection.   What You'll Learn: - Being vs. Doing: Why most men are praised for achievements instead of character - Performance-Based Identity: How tying self-worth to success leads to shame, loneliness, and burnout - Masculinity & Mental Health: Research on traditional masculinity norms and their impact on connection - Affirmations That Matter: Why affirming compassion, resilience, and courage builds lasting confidence - Practical Challenge: Write & share three affirmations about who you are—and three for people you love - Real-Life Stories & Research: Insights from Brene Brown, Therese Norden, and coaching work with men   Challenge for the Week: Write three affirmations you'd love someone to say about your character—and share three affirmations with people close to you. Notice how it shifts your connection. 🎧 Listen now on Spotify, Apple, & YouTube or visit menscollective.co [https://www.menscollective.co/] to go deeper. JOIN THE COLLECTIVE: JOIN THE MEN'S COLLECTIVE: [https://www.menscollective.co/] CLICK HERE [https://www.menscollective.co/] JOIN THE MAILING LIST & GET INVOLVED! CLICK HERE: MAILING LIST [https://sendfox.com/integratedmanproject] INSTAGRAM: MENSCOLLECTIVE.CO [https://www.instagram.com/menscollective.co/] WATCH ON YOUTUBE: WATCH HERE [https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZl0MZxvhTur__jbhXaDrhaYiETYL2_rq&si=yK3kD7N9PJHvxvHQ] Connect and Support Travis: YouTube: Travis Goodman [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuH2pTZa5qen7DTeLhsDm6A] Instagram: @travis.goodman.lmft [https://www.instagram.com/travis.goodman.lmft/] Web: TravisGoodmanLMFT.com [https://www.travisgoodmanlmft.com/]

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Being vs Doing: Why Men Need Affirmation for Who They Are

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This episode is 13 minutes long.

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This episode was published on September 16, 2025.

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In this episode of The Men’s Collective Podcast, we unpack the difference between being vs. doing—and why most men are praised for achievement, performance, and success instead of who they truly are. Travis explores how this performance-based...

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