Before we get to our show, here is a podcast we think you're going to love. Hey guys, I'm Darcy, founder of Spirit. And I'm Kelly, the chief technical officer of Spirit. Back in 2011, we formed the Supernatural Paranormal Investigations and Research Institute, searching for answers to mysterious things that were happening in our little corner of Canada. We haven't stopped searching for those answers ever since. Join us on our podcast, Canadian Spirit, as we dive into all of Canada's most famous and forgotten paranormal mysteries. Examine the evidence and try to figure out what might be behind Canada's ghosts, cryptids, and UFO encounters.
In Canadian spirit, you'll get a peek behind the curtain and see for yourself what being a paranormal investigator is really like and learn something about Canadian history, which isn't as boring as it sounds. Even if it is, we're a pair of chuckle fucks, so we'll do our best to make it entertaining. So come along for the ride and discover for yourself what makes the land of maple and hockey so wonderfully weird. You can find us on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, Podchaser, you know, wherever you find your podcasts. And remember, raccoons are aliens, werewolves are perverts, and ghosts are just downright rude sometimes.
Why, hello, everyone. It's Perhaps It's You, your very favorite, absolute favorite, unofficial, Unsolved Mysteries rewatch podcast. I'm Liz. And I'm Samantha. And we are recording in person. It's a miracle. It's a minor miracle. If this is not working, I'm not doing it again. That's it. I give up. That's the end of a not very prestigious podcasting career. I get a hat, I write podcasting on it, and then I hang up that hat. Yeah, we're just going to call it quits. Yeah. So let's hope that this works. Mac.
finagled our system somehow. And wow, did it turn out that we really, really did not know what we were doing. I'm not sure finagle is the right word. He just did the research we never did, discovered what equipment we should have had, got it for us, and hooked it up. And surprise, it actually worked. Look, I don't know how we ever managed to make a podcast. I think that should be on Unsolved Mysteries. How did two people who had no idea what they were doing just plug some stuff in and they happened to record and we went, yeah, okay, this seems to work. And it turns out that the way that we had it configured, none of the knobs on our mixing board were actually doing anything. And that didn't matter.
Four years. Okay. How long has this podcast been going? Four years? I don't even know anymore. For the entirety. Literally until this episode. We've been recording through a mixer when we record in person. And we've adjusted those knobs. We've turned them up. We've turned them down. We thought it was doing something. Listeners, it was doing nothing. We noticed that it didn't seem to have much effect. But we thought that was because we didn't know what we were doing. And it turns out we didn't know what we were doing so much that actually the computer was like bypassing all that stuff. Look, I can't even explain it to you. Because we don't know what we're doing. But you know what? The sound was pretty good. We often tell the story about sending a photo of our mixer.
to Josh, the Uncovering Unexplained Mysteries podcast, who does know what he's doing. He's like a DJ, records music, all that stuff. And he was so sweet about it, but he was like, wow, this works? Turns out, Josh, it did not work. It basically didn't work, but somehow we did manage to record sound. And I am now thinking that should be a miracle segment on Unsolved Mysteries because it sounds like it shouldn't have worked at all. We had the game turned all the way up. It was not doing anything. And he was definitely like, you must fix that in post. And we were like, yeah, we totally don't do that. Well, it turns out it doesn't matter what we had that turn to because it was doing nothing.
Look, this was a trial and error. We tried something and it worked and we never questioned it. And we occasionally moved the knobs around and that didn't do anything. It didn't matter. It didn't matter. We were sitting here at the table like, oh, they're adjusted gain. Just like a kid pretending to use a computer. Just like, do, do, do, do. That was us. My nephew will sit down at a laptop and be like, oh, I have to get to work. And he like pulls up instructions of how to make a Lego.
That was us. Except actually that was more useful. He got instructions on how to make a Lego. We did nothing. No, we really did nothing. I can't believe our sound sounded that good for so long. We might as well have been on our phones in different rooms. We weren't using this goddamn mixer at all. Yeah. Somehow we got to have two microphones into a computer. That's all we used it for. Not to mix it all. Just so that we could have two microphones. And you know what? This is a testament to trial and error. Sometimes you try things and it just works out.
And the grace of God. It was a total accident. Yeah. Satan just smiles upon you and he goes, you know what? I'm going to let these dumb bitches record. It doesn't matter that this should not work. With the power of Satan, I'm going to let it happen. Oh my God. So Mac is now the producer of our show. I think we have to give him formal credit because he absolutely do. He like finagled all the things to get this to work because our bootleg setup was no longer working after a Windows update. And we were just like, I don't know what to do. And also I give up without even trying.
But fortunately, he figured it out. We're going to go watch some more Turtle Paradise. Yeah, we're busy. We don't have time to figure out our own podcast, which is somehow a business. So if you have something in your life that you would like to do, clearly just do it. It does not matter if you don't know what you're doing. And it's not even fake until you make it. It's just like keep faking it forever. It doesn't matter. There is no making it. We are proof. Yeah, it doesn't matter. Anything that you aspire, just start. That doesn't sound like advice I would give, but it clearly works for this. Yeah. If your goal is to have one of the top.
1.5 percent of podcasts in the entire world which supposedly we have you don't even need to know how a mixer works and you don't even have to be using it You can just turn some knobs that are doing nothing. Yeah. I mean, it's much easier, I will say, if you have one person on your podcast because then you just hook a microphone up to a computer to talk. Somehow, once you get two people, it's like a whole thing. If you want to be in the same room, yes. Yeah, yeah. Which for some reason we do because I guess we like each other. It's more fun this way. We can eat cinnamon buns that you get through someone's window. That literally happened today. One of my great joys, one of the few things that have gotten me through this horrible pandemic period of time is finding people who bake things out of their house that you can buy. Is that like totally legit?
I don't know and I don't care. But in one of these situations, you send this person money, you place an order, and then you go to their house and you literally hold up your name on a piece of paper to a window. And then they open the window and they hand you your order. And that order includes these cinnamon puns. They're the most delicious things I've ever tasted in my life. They were so good.
I don't know what they do. There's something about that frosting. It's so buttery. Extremely buttery. I want another one right now. Also, that was Max Payment for producing today. He got two of those. Speaking of tasty treats, since we're back in prison, we've got to have snack hour again. And I found some Japanese kick cuts for us. These are plum flavor. Why are they green? I don't know. They're like a mint green. I did not expect this to be plum. That doesn't even look like a plum. Well, here you go. We're going to find out how we feel about, I think it's plum. Are those plums? Yes. It says mini plum. Oh, okay.
I'm still not sure why they're green, but... Look, I don't have all the answers. In fact, as we're finding out, I have even less answers than I thought I did. And I know very little about Kit Kats. We're recording. They have a very strong, fruity scent. Oh, yeah, they do. Wow. That tastes like pear to me. Yeah, that's good. It looks delicious. Okay, so these are the type of Kit Kats that do not have chocolate. They have the, like, kind of white coating that is flavored. And it is flavored. Yeah, it tastes more like pear to me. I'm not keeping on the aftertaste. No, it's a little chalky. It tastes like a Tums.
It tastes actually exactly like the green Tums, if you know what I'm talking about. The initial flavor. Very good. Very good. But I actually hate that aftertaste because now I feel like I'm sick and I took a Tums. Yeah, it's chalky. Okay, well, now we know. I don't know that I'm super into the mini plum flavor. It comes in a green bag with, looks like cherry blossoms on it to me, but maybe there's some sort of plum blossom.
on the bag and i don't think i'm gonna be eating most of those the aftertaste really is tomes i just ate the other one in the package kind of regret that i'm not at first i thought i liked this but the more i eat the more liz is making a face i'm not annoyed yeah well no you don't have heartburn now yeah what if we find out these have medicinal quality i'll be more into it then oh god drink some water Okay, that was not a jubilant snack time that I was hoping we would have to be back. You know what? You win some, you lose some. I think that just shows you that everything is an anticlimax. Nothing as good as you want it to be. Nothing is as good as you remember. A lot of life lessons on this episode. That's what happens when we get together in person. You can never go home again. That's what we're learning. You know all your favorite episodes of Perhaps It's You? They're gone. We're never going to achieve those heights. No, we're going to achieve something even better. Well, since we're having a celebratory episode today that I actually get to look Samantha dead in the eye as we record, we're not talking about Unsolved Mysteries today. Nope. We're talking about...
Beyond Belief. We needed some music there. I know. Maybe I'll put something in post. Yeah, we decided, you know, we weren't going to roll the dice with Unsolved Mysteries because sometimes you get a shit episode. Or something so sad. So sad. I mean, the subject matter of this episode of Beyond Belief is pretty sad. Yeah, actually, but. They're all made up, so it's fine. Yeah. Also, I just love having the moment together where we find out if it's true or false. So Samantha and I have watched the episode, but we have not watched the very end. So we will be learning with you whether Beyond Belief has deemed them fact or fiction with absolutely no explanation.
The more of these that we watch, the more convinced I am that Beyond Belief is the absolute pinnacle of American television and nothing is as good. That's a height we will never achieve again. It's so ridiculous. I have to agree. And we chose this episode by Liz Googling best episodes of Beyond Belief. And this is what came up. So we were talking about season two, episode 11. And you can watch these on YouTube now, thanks to FilmRise. Thank you, FilmRise. So they are all free and at your immediate disposal. So you can watch this. If you would like to stop now, watch it and then learn together whether or not these things are fact or fiction. But we'll also be summarizing the segments for you.
The show opens with Jonathan Frakes, and I'm definitely going to say his name wrong, and I don't want any notes about it. He tells us, caution, the show you are about to see is headed towards disaster. And then it goes into the Beyond Belief opening theme song, which tells you some things are true and some things are lies and optical illusions are humanity's greatest achievements or whatever it says. Things are false, but also facts and whatever. So Jonathan Frakes then tells us talk of disaster is very much with us in these times, which is funny because it's like 98. I actually think we're like pretty good, but we have the benefit of hindsight to be fair. Yeah. Yeah. One day we're discussing the sinking of great ships. Are we?
I like that he's like, you know who's always talking about the apocalypse? Liz. So therefore, we're discussing the sinking of great ships. Next, we're contemplating comets headed towards Earth. Remember when the biggest threat to Earth in our minds was a comet? Right, like not a man-made disaster. Us killing the Earth. Yeah, that was a better time. Yeah, I know. It's like, what if a comet came and annihilated us? It's like, oh, we can do that ourselves, actually. We don't even need that comet. Okay, so now I wrote down, every time he shows an optical illusion, I die a little inside.
Because this is supposed to show you to like be optimistic even in times of crisis or something. And it's an optical illusion of a cone. And you can either see it as like a mountain or as a hole to nowhere. Which did you see? I could only see the mountain no matter how hard I tried. Same. Same. Mac said he could see it either way. I kind of don't believe him. I kind of don't either because I really couldn't get it to slip. I couldn't make my brain see a hole. No, I only saw a cone. And I sort of think it's not even an optical illusion. It was just a picture of a cone. Okay. So this is supposed to teach us to take our perspective from the mountaintop and avoid having tunnel vision.
Okay, sometimes this show needs to calm down. Get it. Okay, not sometimes, basically every second. This show takes itself a little too seriously for a show with names like Elmo P. Middleton. It takes itself extremely seriously while providing absolute garbage, and that's what makes it great. Like, they put Jonathan Frakes to introduce things in, you know, like the gentleman's study with a few assorted props that correspond to the show, but then they fill it with, like, roving spotlights, and the contrast of that is hilarious and amazing. Yeah, them acting like this is an intellectual exercise when it's basically a show for children.
I think like any of this could be true is the biggest whatever. Okay. Okay. So now he does like a cheers with a glass in different languages. And that's because the first story is about Charles and Gwen Chandler who have a good reason to celebrate. And they quote are alive due to the strangest of circumstances. And this story is called Bon Voyage. Okay. Okay. In hindsight, knowing how this story ends, that's a little dark. Bon Voyage. This is actually extremely dark. And I like that it's made in such a like chipper manner. It's very incongruous. Okay. So it's the spring of 1937.
Charles and Gwen Chandler are traveling with their beloved friends, Philip and Margaret Delaney. Why do we need to know their names? I don't know. They are together to celebrate their 22nd wedding anniversary. And while they're sitting there having dinner in what appears to be a restaurant, they reveal that they never got to go on their dream honeymoon and they have to change plans. And despite this being their best friends, they have never told them the story of why they had to change their honeymoon plans. And they reveal it's because it's so weird. They made like a pact to never tell anyone because no one would believe them. I find that, I mean, it is weird, but it's not that weird.
No. Also, these people seem like they've been their friends for a really long time and they didn't even trust them to like not make fun of them, I guess. So I don't know what that says about their friendship, but I don't think it's that strong. No. Could be stronger. It could be. I judge. Okay. So Charles and Gwen were married and were supposed to sail to Europe the next day. Only when they wake up, their wedding rings had fused together like they were holding hands in the night after having their post-marital coitus and their rings literally the metal fused.
trapping their hands together and they couldn't get their it off their fingers because their fingers were too swollen so then they were trapped in their night clothes as they said so they had to call a jeweler to their hotel room a totally normal thing and he was able to get special tools and cut the rings apart without damaging their hands or the rings so they get dressed and they rush over to the dock but they had just missed the ship by minutes And their friends are like, oh, this is the saddest story I've ever heard. And they go, it's the luckiest thing that ever happened to us. That's the saddest story they've ever heard? Have they never heard of a story of a kitten dying? Or the orphan train? Or the orphan train? Clearly not. Just these people missing their vacation? Yeah, that's the saddest thing she ever heard in her life. Look, she's very sheltered. But we find out that that ship they were supposed to be sailing on was the Lusitania. And six days later, it was torpedoed and sunk and killed more than a thousand people. Oh, their friends toast them for being so lucky. Now they're the luckiest people in the world.
Except it turns out that they are not in a restaurant and they are approaching their destination. So they stand up and they walk to the observation deck of the fucking Hindenburg. They're literally like toasting being so lucky. And then they're like, oh, look, we're almost there. And they get up and the picture fades from color to black and white, which I actually think was fairly well done so that they can start integrating footage of the Hindenburg exploding. The writers for this episode, I swear to God, are just... This is the most cynical thing. It was like, here are the luckiest people alive. Here's another 22 years of marriage.
And more. And they're like, oh, we have the best friends. Oh, this has been the best flight. I'll take way more blimp flights in the future or whatever. And then they're looking out the window and the person reporting on it is like, oh, the humanity. It's caught fire. Everyone's dead. Everyone's burning alive. And they do actually show you that footage of it exploding and everyone burning alive. The only other thing I've written down about this segment is that Jonathan Frakes asks, have we ignited an explosion of lies?
I'm sure he said something about like, is this true? Or have we ignited an explosion of lies? And I was like, that's not a phrase. It's a phrase I'm going to use from now on. If I suspect someone is lying to me, I'm going to accuse them of igniting an explosion of lies. If you are listening to this podcast and perhaps English is not your first language, do not start using the phrase ignited an explosion of lies as if that is something people commonly say because it has only been said once on the TV show. But now it's going to be part of Samantha's regular repertoire. Absolutely. Okay, so what do you think? Fact or fiction? Absolutely fiction. How could they possibly know this?
I'm going to say that they're going to say it's fact. I'm guessing there is a passenger who survived, who missed being on the Lusitania only to end up on the Hindenburg. Okay. But the ring thing is what I was thinking was fiction. Yeah, sure. But I'm guessing... That's the part they've just made up. Yeah. I'm guessing they're going to claim this as fact. That's my guess. All right. That doesn't make any sense. Did you ever see that...
viral TikTok, which I saw on Twitter because I'm an old, where the woman gets the ring stuck on her finger and has to go to the fire station. No. Apparently, if you are wearing a ring that maybe is just slightly too small and your hands swell up, you can't get it off, most fire stations will have little tools just to saw off your ring. Why the fire station? Because they're good public servants. I have no idea. I think EMTs may also carry them. I'm not really sure. Because it's like a health problem? Yeah. Apparently, it's a common enough problem where people get their ring stuck on them. Sure. You have to use a tiny little saw to saw off the ring. For some reason, I would have thought you had to go to the jeweler.
Maybe that would also work. It seems like that's what they did in this. They call the jeweler. But you can also go to the fire station. I had no idea. There you go. Good public service announcement. That's a problem you're having out there. That is sort of one of my worst nightmares is getting a ring stuck on my finger. Why? It's not that bad. I realize you can just use some soap most of the time and pull it off. I feel like I would have kind of difficulty getting my wedding ring off. Sometimes I do. But not to the point where it literally won't come off. That sounds terrifying to me for some reason. I'm showing Samantha. This would take some work to get this baby off at this point. Do you always leave it on? Yeah. Oh. I take mine off every night. That's when you're not married. You cheat on Travis in your dreams.
I mean, I haven't always worn it my entire marriage or something, but I don't regularly take it off now because it's kind of too small. Oh, okay. If you can't get it off, you can go to the fire station. I'm living your nightmare is my point. I guess. See, I take mine off a lot, actually. When I first got married, my mom told me, you can never take your ring off. And I was like, why? Yeah, that's also not true. She was like, well, you'll lose it or something. It was her rationale. And I was kind of like, well, I'm going to take it off all the time. You're like, I'm going to make meatloaf and I'm not going to wear my ring then. Or dig outside in the dirt. I don't know. Yeah. I like that that's my example. You're going to make meatloaf. You're going to need to take that ring off. You don't want meat juices all in your ring. No
Yeah, anyway. Okay, you have the next one. This one is absurd. I'm kind of obsessed with it. Okay, go ahead. Go ahead. Okay, each of these little vignettes has a name. This one is the man in the Model T. It does not sum this up at all. Bad title. Jonathan Frakes says, have you ever been to a swap meet or a garage sale? No, never. Liz, tell me if you agree with this. He says, quote, to run a successful booth takes a combination of desirable merchandise, a positive attitude, and irresistible charm. I feel like most people that run a flea market booth hate everyone and are hungover.
And are possibly living out of a van. A positive attitude and irresistible charm. That is totally not true because I don't really talk. Okay. There was some mistakes were made in this segment. And part of that is talking to the people that are at your flea market booth. People want to browse. They don't want to be sold stuff. Yeah, exactly. They're just here to look at old junk. They want it. They're going to buy it. Nothing you say is going to change. So I actually very much disagree.
So get ready for the fakest name you've ever heard. Elmo P. Middleton. What? That's my name. According to Jonathan Frakes. Yeah, that's a real John Jingle Jimmerheimer Schmidt or whatever that name is. That's a real fake. Jonathan Frakes says that he had all of these. But despite this, you might say that his business was a disaster. Oh, it fits in with the theme. The theme of this episode is fucking disaster. It's not like when one person dies. It's when lots of people die. So grim. So this takes place at a local swap meet. A woman is narrating. And at the beginning of this tells us that, quote, the swap meet had been closed for a month ever since the earthquake.
a weird tie-in to this theme. Like, by the way, this swap meet is earthquake related. It's not. Anyway, so there were apparently still Aftershocks happening a month later. That is one hell of an earthquake. Goddamn. We don't get earthquakes in Minnesota, but a month later. I feel like that's not a thing. Holy shit. I think that's, at that point, a different earthquake. I think so. There has to be a line. Also, where are they? There's like rockets? I swear this swap meet is at the base of a launch pad for some fucking rockets or something. Is that Elon Musk's house? I don't know. Where are they? It looks like it. I don't understand. It's like rubble. Okay, there's like sand. There's rubble. There's like...
big metal equipment. But then there's just motherfucking rockets. I think they might be smokestacks. At the very end, you get a kind of a wider angle shot that makes them kind of look like industrial smokestacks or something. But when they're up close, they seriously look like rockets. And I was expecting that an earthquake was going to happen and these rockets were going to start going off and just engulf everybody in flames at the swap meet. Or that Elmo would jump on one of the rockets and ride into space.
Imagine if that was the ending of this. Imagine if that was the ending and they told us it was fact. I would go, give this show the Nobel Prize. The Nobel Prize for what, Liz? Literature? Anything. Yeah, literally anything. Physics? Give them all the Nobel Prizes. Are you kidding? And then you show them the episode, they're like, all right, yeah, I get it. Fair enough. This is way better than my life's work that improved humanity. L.M.O.P. Middleton hanging onto a rocket.
say the most random thing and this has nothing to do with anything but yesterday mac asked me what a baby turkey is called you know like a duck is a duckling or whatever did you look it up is it just a baby turkey well i just yeah i just made it up anyway i said they were called squawkers that's true they're not called squawkers they're called like pulse pulse i was googling it squawker is way better have you talked to the turkey committee You should tell them that they should rename people. I just said the first thing that came to my mind, which was squawkers. But that's not right, everyone. It's poults. Like poultry. Oh, that's lame. It should be squawkers. Anyway, I just keep thinking about it and laughing. But go on about Elmo T. Nilton. Okay, so despite these earthquakes that are happening constantly, the SWAT meet opened at 8am.
Because nothing's going to stop the swap meet. Well, if the pandemic has shown us anything, it's very realistic. I'm not going to let these earthquakes stop me from selling a broken lamp. Yes, are we next to old rockets that could go off at any moment? Yeah, but I have to sell my junk. Yeah, I've got a spinning wheel that doesn't work. So the woman near anyone, so I'm not sure we ever learned her name, arrives at the swap meet with her daughter, Molly. They are going to run their own booth this weekend to make some money for Molly, who wants to go off to college.
Yeah. What a fool. Molly is described as the best daughter you could ask for. She doesn't seem that great, honestly. Wow. Harsh critic over here. Look, she needs to fill in her eyebrows. They're real small. She can really... Yeah, I know. Look. Trends change. But you look back on some of those 90s eyebrows and you go... You want to go back and tell Molly, don't pluck your eyebrows and also don't go to college. Yeah. Molly, you're making a number of mistakes here. But you've plucked her eyebrows so much that not all of that is going to grow back in when trends change. No. You're making some permanent decisions whether you realize it or not.
So I'll have you know Liz. She worked hard in high school and had one goal in mind, to go to college. For what? Nothing. Just college-ing. I guess. So Molly and her mom are getting out of the car, and Molly's mom says that her late husband Marv's life insurance only covered so much, and with her meager wages from her day job, they barely get by, never mind paying college tuition at a good school, which is where Molly wants to be. I like that we know the name of a guy that's dead, but not the name of the person actually telling us the story. I don't think we ever learned her name. I don't think we do either. She's just Molly's mom. She's just mom. So Molly is always preoccupied for some reason, and instead of helping her mom with a booth, she stares blankly into space.
So maybe she's not that good of a daughter. She's dreaming about having better brows. She's thinking about how good she's gonna have to get with a brow pencil when she's older. She's going to have to fill back in. You're always going to have to fill his brows in. Put aside some money for microbrilating Molly. It's going to be a pain in the ass. So Molly's mom doesn't have much luck selling her wares at first. Yeah, because people walk up to that table and she's like pouncing on them. You want this? You want that? That just makes people want to leave your table and go somewhere else. You can't do that with the high pressure sales like that. No. So no one seems to want to buy anything. Three hours go by and they only sell one lampshade when suddenly an old man walks up and very rudely says they're not going to sell anything because their booth sucks. Well, yes. He says, what are you selling here? It's just a bunch of regular junk. I don't see anything special. Well, it's a flea market, dude.
I don't know what he was expecting. Calm down. He was expecting something really special. I guess. You know what? That stuff looked fine. I probably would have bought some of that stuff. Yeah, it was fine. Old stuff. But then he offers to buy their station wagon, to which they were like, no, how are we supposed to get home? This is so random. It has nothing to do with the story. He's like, I could use this for hauling my junk. And they're like, how did you get here? We needed to haul our junk, too. This rocket launch pad is in the middle of nowhere. Did you walk here? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. They're like, no, you can't have our car, weirdo.
It has nothing to do with anything. It's just padding it out. I think this is a stat for him to say this ominous statement or this foreshadowing statement where he says, have it your way, but I wouldn't count on having a big day. Oh, I think they have a bigger than big day. I think they do too. At this point, they have a tearful exchange in which Molly tells her mom maybe she should put off going to college, which is a good idea, Molly. Yeah, you should save up some money. That's a good idea, Molly. Don't listen to your mom. No, Molly's mom insists that they will find a way to send her to fucking Harvard or something. I don't care what sort of predatory debt we get into, Molly.
You are going. You're not going to a state school. You're going to some, I don't know. I think I was to go to state school. Oh, they only say that she wanted to go to a good school, which I assume they meant like Princeton. Well, Molly's not getting into Princeton. You got to have connections for that. That's true. That's really true. Sorry, Molly. Things aren't going to go the way you want. So the moment is interrupted by the honking of a horn. It's not like a normal car horn, though. It sounds like a clown car horn. Yeah, it's a clown car horn. Or like a bicycle horn or something.
A Model T, which I'm just going to have to assume is a Model T. It looks like a hunk of junk to me. I don't know. It comes tearing around the corner. And Molly's mom's narration says that's when we first saw him, the man in the Model T. And I literally wrote down in all caps what is happening. No matter what you think is happening. It's not that. It's not that. So the guy who gets out is this roly-poly dude in an old-timey aviator hat with goggles. He has a curled handlebar mustache and a bright yellow jacket with a yellow scarf. What is the villain in Sonic the Hedgehog? Because that's what he looks like. Is he Dr. Robotnik or something? Sure.
That's what he looks like. He has that mustache and he has, like, the dress of someone in a cartoon. I don't know why he's dressed like this. He's wearing a bright yellow, like, floor-length coat. Yeah. It's like a duster, but it's yellow. Like a normal person. I don't understand. He has the mustache of a carnival barker. Yeah. I don't know. He runs over to the women and declares that his name is Elmo P. Middleton.
It's a real name, everyone. That's not made up for sure. And he is a purveyor of unusual and rare merchandise. Okay, that is my dream job, though. To be a purveyor of unusual and rare merchandise. Maybe you should find Elmo P. Middleton. Follow your own advice. Just start. Just start being a purveyor of rare and unusual merchandise. At this moment, there is a tremor in the ground, and the items on the table rattle around. Molly's mom asks the man if he felt that, and he says he didn't feel a thing. What does that have to do with anything, you ask? Nothing. I think it's because he might be a ghost, so he can't feel the tremors of the earth. I don't know. What?
It's supposed to be spooky. It's not. It's just confusing. It is confusing. So then he abruptly says, well, maybe next time and runs back to his truck to unload his stuff.
So amongst the stuff in his truck is an old wind chest that we are obviously supposed to notice because he dramatically gestures to it like Vanna White while looking directly in the camera. Like breaking the third wall, just being like, make sure you see I have this old chest audience. He's got like a gramophone, books, just like old junk, but like nicer old junk. Yeah. Yeah. So while he's doing that, Molly's mom says that the one thing that, quote, haunted her is why he didn't feel the tremor that they all felt. Not that a cartoon had come alive and was running around in front of her.
No, it was like he didn't feel the earthquake. Okay, well. So that same grouchy old man who was at Bali in her mom's booth before Elmo showed up, tries to buy a gramophone and then some old books, but Elmo refuses to give a price and just keeps saying, how much you got? Every time someone asks about anything. And he thinks it's like funny. He's like smirking about it. How much you got? How much you got? He's got like that Santa Claus twinkle in his eye. Yeah. Yeah. This would annoy me so much. And it annoys everybody at the swap meet. I mean, I guess you could just be like, I don't know, $5? I mean, that's probably what I would say. 50 cents.
Can I have a gramophone or not? So yeah, no matter what people asked for, that's what he would say. And it annoyed everyone, so no one bought anything from him. So I feel like the things Jonathan Frank said were false. Because this guy does have the merchandise. He does have the charm. He does have whatever else he said. A positive attitude. Yeah, and he doesn't sell jack shit. Well, that's because he's annoying everybody. So at this point, Molly goes over his truck and admires a lamp. And Elmo walks over and in a kindly voice asks her if she likes the lamp and how much money she has. Which is supposed to be like...
Charming. And yeah, like Santa Claus-y. It's a little creepy to me, but that might just be the way it's presented. Molly insists that she couldn't buy anything. And as she walks away, he calls her back by her name. And she is startled because she never told him her name. It's a very dramatic moment. He asks how much money she has in her pockets. And she says $3, to which he replies, sold. And I feel like she was going to be like, OK, but actually, I need that money to get lunch. I told you I can't buy the lamp. You're not very good at listening, Elmo.
Molly happily hands over the $3 and takes the lamp. Later, she told her mom that she didn't know why she gave the man her $3, but there was just something about him that she liked and trusted. She was like, I wish I had spent that on beef jerky, which we all know is more valuable than gold. Yeah, maybe she could pay for her college education with that. Yeah, it's an investment. At the end of the day, the man, Elmo P. Middleton, drives off, but he leaves his wooden chest on the ground. Molly, because she's the only person who cares about this man, shouts after him that he forgot his chest, but he yells back, it belongs to you, Molly! It belongs with the lamp!
As he's tearing off in his... Somehow she can hear every word of that, which would clearly, like, be lost in the wind. Yeah. Molly curiously approaches the chest with her mom. As they get closer to the chest for a closer look, they are shocked to see a sticker on the side with Titanic written on it. We're not even, like, ballpoint pen? That's also, like, not faded. The sticker's, like, brand new. This was not under the ocean. No. At all. So Molly's mom throws open the chest, declaring that this could be worth a fortune. Inside is a book of beautiful, old, pristine items, including china, books, some jewels. Molly's mom, at this point, decides to tell us that Molly's great-grandfather was one of the passengers.
lost on the titanic what a coincidence i really feel like that's you cannot introduce that at that point in the story that needed to somehow be brought up earlier like our family is no stranger to disaster yeah not only have we had to deal with these these earthquakes but molly's great-grandfather was on the titanic you can't just go oh by the way what a coincidence did i tell you that we knew someone on the titanic oh i didn't no there's no oh i'm still waiting for the rockets to launch and all of a sudden there's like by the way by the way did we mention the titanic Also, he had a handlebar mustache too, just like Mr. Middleton.
But why would he say his name is Elmo P. Middleton? I don't know, because his name was Marvin L. Jurgens, another name that for sure was not made up. Wait, she married a guy named Marv, and this guy's name is Melvin? Marvin. She married a guy named Marv, and this guy's name was Marvin. I assume he's named after Marvin. So it must have been on, maybe it's on Molly's father's side. Yeah, okay. So her father, the late Marv, was probably named after this guy from the Titanic. That's the connection. See, that was the foreshadowing, Liz. I didn't know that one of the passengers on the Titanic was named Marvin. See, it would have been actual foreshadowing if he didn't go by Elmo P. Middleton, if he went by Marvin. Yeah.
Then you could look back on it and be like, oh, Marv, Marvin, instead of like, yeah. And they bring up Evalon P. Middleton like so prominently. And it's such a bizarro name. So at this very moment, she pulls out a flask with the name Marvin L. Juergens written on it. So Molly and her mom are able to sell off all this shit to pay for Molly's college education. Wow. It's a beautiful story. I wrote down, remind me to give more mysterious trunks as gifts.
Just leave them on the ground. As you're leaving the party, just be like, it's yours! It's yours! And they'll be like, what? I don't know what Liz said as she was driving away. It was probably fuck you. Okay, so now we're on to the third segment or mystery or whatever you want to call it. And at the turn of the century, the last century, that is, news came by Way of the Telegraph. It's so funny. Like, which century did you think we were thinking, Jonathan Frakes? The one that was coming up. The millennium. Yeah, but that would be in the future. The millennium.
Samantha probably doesn't remember when everything was referred to as the fact that the calendar was going to switch over and blow all our minds. I'm not that young. Yeah, you are. Okay. I'm not Arden. Little baby Samantha over here. Okay. So then Jonathan Frakes vaguely shows us what a telegraph is. And we learned that Jack Hogan is a reporter in need of a good story. Why? Because he's a bad reporter. This guy's so bad at his job. The only story he can come up with is in his dreams. And his dreams are about to become nightmares.
worst writing I've ever had in my life and I seriously just wrote down seriously what the fuck His dreams are about to become nightmares. This is called The Scoop. And it starts in an old-timey newspaper office that's probably just part of a library they put a bunch of desks in. I think it probably was. Because there's weird flags hanging all over this place. Yeah, there's like weird French flags. And I don't know where they are. They're supposed to be in Philadelphia. I'm not buying that it's actually a newspaper office. But they're very pleased with how old-timey the set looks. Jack tells us that it's a Monday morning in 1883 and he couldn't find a story to save his life. That might be because he's not looking for a story. He's literally just sitting at a desk staring at a black page of a typewriter. And guess what? He can't figure out what he should report on from that.
He might need to go talk to some people. Yeah, leave his desk. He's just waiting for something to come over the wire. He's not willing to do any footwork. Honestly, he should be fired. So we learn that this is Philly. His editor comes in and is happy other people are typing and then mad he's not typing. What is this guy's name again? Treadwell? Yeah, I think it's something Treadwell. So made up. It's another very fake name.
Okay, so Jack decides that he's going to wait around for the late wire to come in instead of going home or going to the bar with other reporters. But there's nothing interesting. And he is going to lie on the couch just for a second, but of course immediately falls asleep. And then dreams of an erupting volcano, which seems extremely Freudian to me. But when he wakes up from his erupting volcano dreams, he decides that he's going to write it down and maybe sell it as a short story and then compares himself to Mark Twain.
Okay, moving on. He writes this short story in less than an hour, and the story seems to basically be like, and a volcano blew up. He could be doing his job right now, and instead he's writing about a dream he had last night, and suddenly he thinks he's Mark Twain. We've all known dudes like this. I think that's all I'm going to say.
Very true. Okay. So he writes the story in less than an hour, which again, I don't think the story is very good. And he leaves it in the typewriter going home to go to sleep. And then because he's not good at his job, he sleeps in and he's not there. After getting yelled at the day before, he's like, I'll just go in super late the next day. It's fine. So the copy boy comes around to collect people's stories and he sees the dream in the typewriter and assumes he's supposed to collect it. Because why would you be typing out your dreams at work and just leaving them around for people to find? So that ends up in the newspaper.
And the editor is very excited because it's the biggest scoop they've had in years. It's a scoop. It's a volcano. It's a scoop of volcano. So Jack goes into work and he's for some reason dressed like he's in sense of sensibility because they didn't have enough like old timey costumes of the right era.
It's like very regal. I don't know. It's not right. I don't know enough about fashion to tell you why, but it's just off. And I think he's supposed to have just like crawled out of bed. But he looks like he's in a Christmas carol. He's going to go ask if he can have extra coal for the fire or whatever. So he goes into work in his silly outfit and everybody's very excited and congratulating him. And he's just standing there going, because he doesn't understand what's happening. And then the editor comes out and congratulates him on the big scoop about the volcano. And he has to be like, oh, so that was a dream that I wrote down because I'm not good at my job.
have to print a retraction you have to print a retraction and say there aren't actually volcanoes okay but there's no volcanoes anywhere obviously the editor is not super pleased but before he can get the retraction into print reports start coming in regarding huge tidal waves and something happening in the Indian Ocean so Jack is called into the editor's office and he finds out that his dream is actually true And that he like knew the actual name from the island and not what colonizers called it. And how would he know that? It was Krakatoa. And we're told that the locals call it, I forget what. Prairie or something. Oh God. I can see the word. I watched with subtitles on. Prolope. Prolope. Yes, you're right. Okay. And it's like actual name. Yeah. He was calling it like the correct name and not a made up name. And Jonathan Frakes is like, how could he have known such an obscure name?
Yeah. How would he have gotten this right? Some people know it. Because this guy is obviously not that bright. So how did he, how would this guy figure it out? How did he get? And then he asks, is this scoop of the century real or is it something we dreamed up? Oh, get it. Get it.
Okay, now it's our turn. Wait, did you think this one was fact or fiction? Oh, wait, we didn't say that for the last one, did we? I guess it's obvious. It's absolutely fucking fiction. I'm going to be so mad. I'm going to be so mad and possibly quit this podcast if they try to tell us that Elmo P. Middleton and his trunk of titanic wares is real. I will riot. I will find the person that wrote that story and I will write an angry letter.
Okay, so for this one, I bet they're going to claim this one was real. Oh, I think they're going to say it's fiction, because I honestly find this one kind of boring. Okay. But that's why I think it's real. Oh, okay. Same reason. Well, Greaseless. We'll find out. All right. Okay. Here's another weird one. This is like the final destination of Beyond Beliefs.
So, Robert, I was going to call him Robert Stack. Wow. Jonathan Frakes is sitting in a plane seat in his gentleman's study. And he's buckled in. He's buckled in. There's just two random seats. They have to model safety. This is on TV lists. Yeah, well, there could be some turbulence. Even though it's on the ground. It's clearly not in a plane. It's just like two seats you would have to, I guess, demo airplane safety. Jonathan Frakes tells us something that used to be true, which is that flying can be a pleasure. Yeah, this has not been true in a while. Maybe it is for Jonathan Frakes because he gets to like. He's playing on a private plane. Or like first class at least. Yeah, he's not in economy. Squish between two people who probably have COVID.
Wait, what if you got on a plane and the person sitting next to you was Jonathan? That would be a pleasure. That's the only time it would be a pleasure. Yes, absolutely. Oh, but you know he can't do that because people would want to talk so much Star Trek to him. Yeah, he travels with a disguise. He has that ghost face mask from Scream.
the problem about being in something that's like really popular to nerds is that must be everyone's gonna notice you everyone is gonna want to ask you like a bunch of questions about things you don't remember like in this episode where the alien says this he's just like what i just want to go to the grocery store he still goes to like cons and stuff so he asks i mean he kind of must expect it yeah but there's gotta be times where he's like please just leave me alone he just wants to eat his his air food yeah i'm just trying to eat a chili dog on this plane So according to Jonathan Fricks, Beth McGuire is on vacation, and she's flown many times before to Europe, Asia, and beyond. But she's about to take off on a trip where the final destination is beyond belief.
You know what? It kind of is beyond my belief. You know what? It kind of is. So Beth is on this plane. She's excited to travel to Tahiti to drink piña coladas on the beach. Who wouldn't be? That sounds great. She boards the plane and heads for economy when a flight attendant stops her saying that first class is the other way. And Beth is confused. She's like, okay, what does that have to do with me? She shows the flight attendant her boarding pass and tells her that there must be a mistake because she didn't pay for first class. Don't question that. No, the flight attendant simply says, well, it must be your lucky day. Yeah, she's been upgraded. It's just a little foreshadowing because it's not her lucky day at all.
Anyone else? It is time for lucky days. I'm going to argue what it is. You're not. That's kind of true. So Beth settles into the window seat, excited to be experiencing first class for the first time, but is once again corrected by the flight attendant who tells Beth that her seat is actually the aisle seat. And the man who takes the seat next to Beth very nicely offers to switch with her if she would prefer the window. But at this very moment, Beth meets the eyes of the flight attendant who gives her a frightened look and shakes her head no. It's the look of someone being held hostage in a bank. You can only make eye contact and you're trying to make as little motion as possible. You're just like, hey, Samantha, no.
Don't switch seats. I would get off that plane immediately. Something weird is happening. Yeah, there was a bomb on that plane. And it's under that seat. He's like, oh, you don't want that one. That one's going to explode. So understandably, Beth looks confused and concerned, but she declines the man's offer and stays in the aisle seat, which is the better seat. Yeah, now you can get up and pee whenever you want. You don't have to make that guy move when he falls asleep. I don't know how long the flight to Tahiti is, but you're going to want the aisle. So Beth feels a little out of place in first class, but just says that she tries to put it out of her mind and enjoy the experience. She says that all kinds of new things were happening to her, including a personal visit from the pilot mid-flight. Also, this plane is so old that these seats are like fucking lazy boys. They're huge. They're so big. You could have fit like three of this woman in one of those seats.
Yeah, you could curl up in the fetal position and enjoy a little nap. Lovely. Bygone era. So the pilot, who is visiting Beth for some reason, asks her how she is enjoying the flight and helpfully reminds her to keep her seatbelt fastened in case they hit a small pocket of turbulence. I think only a pilot can remind you. Yeah. Only a pilot has that knowledge. Despite having flown all over the place, she doesn't know that you're supposed to have your seatbelt fastened when you're sitting down. Whatever. Rich people in first class make their own rules. So when Beth remarks at how nice it was that the captain would stop by to see her, her seatmate looks at her like she's lost it and tells her that he didn't see anyone come to visit her.
I would honestly just assume this guy is drunk. So would I. He's a business guy in first class. Glug glug. So Beth, narrating, says, at the time it all seemed very strange, but that looking back on it, it all makes sense to her now. Well, it is also very strange. And I don't know that it even really could ever make sense, Beth. Because it's something that would never happen. The pilot just goes for a casual stroll down the aisle. He's like, oh, by the way. He's not supposed to be flying the plane.
That's what a co-pilot's for, Samantha. So he can go hit on the hot passengers. Yeah, fair. A little while into the flight, Beth is dozing when she's startled awake by a routine announcement from the pilot telling them that they are about an hour away from their stopover in Hawaii. At this point, Beth says that the oddest feeling suddenly came over her. She was very anxious and tense all of a sudden. Probably because all the other passengers on the plane are creepily turning around in their seats to smile maniacally at her.
This is some real like village of the damned shit where all the children suddenly are like doing everything at the same time. It's not meant to be horrifying, but it kind of is. Like this would be a good horror movie where like everyone on the plane is just turning around to look at only you. Yeah, you were on a plane and yeah, like everybody was doing everything like Stepford Wives-y and you're like the only normal person. You're like, what is happening? Yeah, that's kind of what this is. I can't get off this plane until we're in Hawaii and I'm not sure I'm going to make it. And also the plane is full of snakes. If anybody wants to, someone pitch that. If somebody wants to pitch that movie, you have to give me 5%. Yeah.
That's all I ask. That's fair. So flustered, Beth gets up to go to the bathroom. In the bathroom, an announcement from the captain instructs passengers to return to their seats immediately. So she rushes back to her seat and asks her seatmate if he thinks that the captain's announcement means that they're arriving early. The man is once again confused. But also, no, that's not what that means. And he says there wasn't any announcement. And then they kind of argue about it. Yeah. And again, I would just be like, oh, this guy's drunk. But he points out to Beth that everyone is still walking around the cabin and asks her if she is all right, which she clearly is not. Yeah.
After this exchange, Beth looks over at the flight attendant, who is chatting with the passenger, but mid-conversation looks over at her again and seemingly telepathically tells her to tighten her seatbelt. I think we've all had this happen to us on a flight. I think so. Same old, same old. A flight attendant telepathically tells you to buckle up. Buckle up, Samantha. But doesn't tell the passenger sitting right next to her, who's also not buckled up? Well, it's not their lucky day, is it? No, because a second later, part of the side and roof of the plane is ripped off, and the man sitting next to Beth is sucked out of the plane, but Beth and a handful of other passengers survive the flight. I think they say that, like...
The front four rows of seats or whatever is sucked out. But Beth survives because she had guardian angels on the flight with her. Too bad nobody else did. When I watched this with Samantha, she was like, if she really had a guardian angel, she would have been in the back of the plane. Because Samantha watched too much air disasters and she knows which seats are actually the safest. That's true. But also in this segment, the front rows in first class only are ripped off. So the fact that she was upgraded to first class means I don't think her guardian angels were doing a great job. Well, okay. She got the more comfortable seat and she lived. That's true. I guess they were fine. She didn't get sucked out of the plane. No, but she has the trauma of having talked to someone seconds before they're sucked out into just...
the vacuum of sky plummet to the ground yeah she has to live with that for the rest of her life okay do you think this one was fact or fiction i think they're gonna say it's fact okay do you want to me to bring in my air disaster knowledge absolutely how could i not they're gonna say this is fact because this actually happened Sort of. Okay, so there was a Hawaiian air flight that was making trips from Florida to Hawaii. Oh, the salt thing? Yeah, and the corrosion from the ocean caused a door in the front of the plane to fly off mid-flight, and it ripped off the roof of the plane and was basically a convertible until it landed. So this is an episode of air disasters that I immediately remembered. I remembered the Hawaii thing. So the fact that they're flying to Hawaii makes me think they're going to say this is true. However, the part I had to look up was how many people died. Only one person died. There was a flight attendant on that flight that wasn't sitting down who got sucked out. But otherwise, everybody else survived. So the fact that they say that four rows of seats were lost, they're making parts of this.
story, which kind of doesn't need to be dramatized. The fucking top of the plane came off. Google pictures of it if you've never seen this. It's wild. It's terrifying. Absolutely terrifying. And all those people just cruised onto Hawaii just with their whole bodies exposed. How fast do planes fly? 500 miles per hour? I have no idea. You're going to get some bugs in your teeth. Yes. So everyone who was sitting down survived that flight. They weren't sucked out of the plane, but I do think they're going to say this. I like it as her lucky day, but yeah, that guy had no guardian angel. He just got a... Maybe someone in real life claimed that they had guardian angels that moved their seats or something, but no one who was sitting down actually died.
Beyond Belief is taking liberties with this story. I find that hard. I find that Beyond Belief, Samantha. I believe it all. Elmo P. Middleton and Lisa Pusher are a real person. Yeah, he's my hero. Okay, we've got one more. We're told that weather forecasting is no longer a guessing game. And I feel like a lot of people would disagree with that. But this is the story of little Louisa, who was playing in her basement when a storm hit that destroyed a bunch of houses. Listeners, if you were on the fence about watching this episode, you should watch it just for this one. And the reveal at the end. It's something.
I have to insist this is fiction because supposedly Louise's favorite words are buenos dias. And I just refuse to believe that's anyone's favorite words. No. But also Jonathan Sank says her favorite words are buenos dias. What a good day is the last thing Louise is having. It's true.
to say it that way it's okay a tornado is um strikes southeast texas without warning we are told there are eight people dead 60 injured and dozens unaccounted for there's a reporter apparently named wanda lopez who's doing her best like courtney coxson scream impression i don't know why we even needed to know her name it's not important at all this burgundy suit she's wearing though it's something okay so another real name skip is an emergency responder and he's been searching for survivors in the rubble for the past 14 hours when he hears a child crying and his co-workers try to convince him that it's nothing but it's like clearly a little kid trapped in a basement but they're like no no let's just go home and skip's like no no i can hear her so that's louisa And they're having trouble getting her out of the basement without stuff collapsing on her. She has a head injury, so Skip is talking to her to try to keep her awake. And the other, I don't know, construction-y guys keep telling, like, it's going to be hard to get her out of there. There's a lot of concrete. Construction-y guys? Yeah, you know, the rescue workers with hard hats. Yeah. The construction-y guys. That's what they're called, yeah. Okay, fine. I think Samantha's real black beyond belief right now. All right, listeners.
can you believe this you believe what i have to put up with no okay so louisa has a head injury and skip is trying to keep her awake i might have already said that so at this point louisa says that every morning her grandfather wakes her up in a happy voice and says buenos dias louisa and this is like her favorite thing or something it's like really it's the only reason this is like seven-year-old has to live Things are real bleak, but she loves her grandfather saying buenos dias every morning. And so she kept like, we got to get this grandfather. We got to bring an old man into this disaster area where all these buildings have fallen over. It's real safe. Because that's what's going to keep Louisa hanging on. But tragically, we find out that he died, Samantha. He was one of the victims of the volcano. Very sad. By which I mean tornado. Volcano was the other story. I couldn't even question that. Volcano was also a volcano. Who knows? Volcano was the other story.
Okay, so a tornado ripped into a volcano. It picked up the lava. The lava is like swirling through this Texas town. Yeah, and also there's some sharks got in there. Well, of course. Yeah, because that's how tornadoes work. So they can't get the grandfather to talk to her because of the volcano. Because he's dead. Because he's dead. But then, Lucas, I hear the voice.
saying buenos dias luisa buenos dias and she goes grandfather is that you it's just i luisa buenos dias luisa and the construction guys are like where is that coming from where is that coming from is it from beyond the grave well when they finally manage to get luisa out and she's laying on the stretcher she hears it again buenos dias luisa and they look up and what should come out of a window but a parrot This was apparently her grandfather's parrot, Pedro. And it's saying in a parrot voice, not in the grandfather voice that we've been hearing. Buenos dias, Luisa. Buenos dias. It is a motherfucking parrot. And Samantha just kept going, grandpa's dead. And that ends the story. Luisa goes, grandfather, is that you? Is that you? And then I just imagined the parrot going, grandpa's dead. It's a parrot. She goes, grandpapa.
I'm on death's door. Is that you? To comfort me in my final hours and save my life, perhaps? Oh no. It's a fucking parrot. And I wrote down in all caps, oh my god, it is actually a parrot. I think that was the exact text I sent you while I was watching this. I think so. It's a parrot. Jonathan Franks asks us, is it possible that a parrot could give a young girl the will to live? Is it possible? No! Is it possible? No! He also asks if it's possible that the grandfather somehow transferred his spirit to the parrot to save his beloved granddaughter. And obviously the answer to that is yes.
He clearly transferred his spirit into a parrot. Buenos dias, Samantha. Lava tornado volcano. When the fucking parrot comes out, I cannot. It is one of the greatest moments in television history. Nothing could have prepared me for that parrot. I knew that this show is what you might say not good. That might be how you describe it. And I knew it was trash garbage. And yet nothing braced me for that parrot. I thought it was going to be a ghost. I thought it was a parrot to climb out of the rubble. I thought it was a ghost. Yeah, of course. Not a parrot. Not a parrot that somehow doesn't sound like a parrot and sounds eerily like a human. Yeah. Wow. Okay. So did you think that one was fact or fiction?
If that is fact, I don't know how I'm going to live with myself. It's got to be fiction. Okay. Well, if the tornado was real, that might be enough for them to say it was fact. Yeah. Tornado is real. Therefore. Okay. Are you ready to find out what was fact? I'm never more ready for anything in my life. I can't believe we've waited this long to find out. Let's go. What about the story of the unlucky couple who survived the Lusitania only to celebrate aboard the Hindu? Did the tale of these fated passengers really happen? Okay. I was wrong about that one. That was fiction. Whoever made that up is sick. Why would you make that up?
You had me convinced, actually. I'm sorry. Okay, let's find out about Elmo P. Middleton, who's totally real. God, he's even creepier than I remember. Is this plot of the couple who found treasures in a most unexpected... It wasn't a couple? It was a mom and a daughter, you sicko. Oh, you don't say! Fiction! Wow. Okay, strobe lights. We got that one right. I think true, because it was so boring. I thought it was false, because it was so boring. So we'll see. I don't know why you'd make this up, because it's not that good. You could make up anything. Like the Hindenburg.
Happened on an island called Krakatoa just west of Java. There's still going on. There are reports of tidal waves coming in from all of us. Was this a story based on a real event? It probably was. It's... Beck! Beck! Oh yeah! Woo! Let's do a dance on celebration. I'm the Leon Belief expert. You're right. It was the boring ones are the ones they make up. Yeah. No, the boring ones are true. They just cut to the plane ripped open. I don't know how planes work. God, those seats are so big.
Quiet drunk. No, there's the stewardess giving her that head shake of death. No, I'm getting off this flight, actually. You can have both seats. Similar. Similar. That's very key. Okay. Okay. The parrot. The parrot. I just refused. Oh, that segment was called Buenos Dias, everyone. A parrot. Thank goodness. I can fiction across the parrot. Have you ever heard of a parrot? Well, they're not real. Have you ever seen the baby parrot?
Wow. Okay, we did pretty good. We did pretty good on that one, yeah. We knew that parrot was fucking made up. Did a parrot's voice save a girl's life? No. I'm almost disappointed. But I love that screen of a parrot stamped. We really need a screenshot of that. Someone get a tattoo of that, please. I mean, have you ever seen a baby parrot, Liz? I honestly haven't. Oh, there you go. I've seen, like, really old parrots. Yeah, but not a baby one. It's a really old government drone.
You're right. You're right. You got me. Well, that brings us to the end of our episode. Okay. That's the real factor fiction. Birds. Yeah. Think about it. Obviously fiction. Pigeons. Ever seen a big pigeon? No. You haven't, have you? Except then our friend Zena was like, yeah, obviously. Of course I have. So what's a hole in that? Okay. So what? Social media. That's a thing. Oh, yeah. So we can plug our shit now.
We have a website, perhaps2.com. We sure do. You should send us your spooky stories so we can compile them for our listener stories episode. Also, if you would like to submit something to the next issue of the zine, if you have some sort of creative thing that can be printed on paper, send us over to perhaps2podcast.gmail.com. The sky's the limit with what you can submit. We're getting some interesting things. A cross-stitch pattern, a tarot spread, a spell. Do we have any recipes yet? No, someone make a recipe. So we need a recipe. Make a Mad Lib. Yes. And a word search. Yep, we need one of those. And maybe a paper doll of Jonathan Frakes. Or Robert Stack. Or both. And then you can make him kiss.
Yes. Yes. I need someone to illustrate a parent with just fiction stamped across it. Yeah. Oh, I wonder if I could get those made as stamps. That would be amazing. That would be a good Patreon for the fiction parents.
put that on I don't know everything oh stupid question okay um what else okay subscribe yeah five stars do us a solid and slam that subscribe button uh you could leave us a review on whatever platform you care to review just make sure you give us five stars that's the rule um you can also send us money on patreon oh yeah you should talk about cool stuff on patreon you get a bonus episode once a month and if you're a new subscriber you get like over 40 episodes instantaneously because we're bad at business and that costs one dollar one dollar It's a heck of a deal. You know we're bad at business because we didn't even know how this mixing board works. And we have a podcast business somehow. Somehow. So I think that's pretty much everything. Thanks for sharing the mysteries and magic of Beyond Belief with us this week. Thank you. We'll be back to Unsolved Mysteries in two weeks. Yep. This is now a fortnightly podcast. Yes. Did I just want to say fortnightly? Yes, I said it. Say that as often as possible. Absolutely. Thanks, everyone. Keep working. Bye. Bye.