Breaking Cycles: A Foster Youth, Now an Adoptive Mom

In this powerful and deeply vulnerable episode, Lainey Hartley shares her extraordinary journey from childhood neglect, foster care, and kinship care to becoming a foster mom, adoptive mom, author, and advocate. She opens up about the moments that shaped her, being pulled from her mother’s arms as a toddler, surviving homelessness, navigating an abusive relationship as a teen, and learning to raise children while still carrying the weight of her own unmet childhood needs.Lainey and Anna explore the emotional collision that happens when parenting reawakens the wounds you thought you had outgrown. They talk about postpartum triggers, perfectionism learned through survival, and what it feels like to foster children whose stories painfully mirror your own. Through it all, Lainey reveals how healing, both slow and powerfully, has softened the way she parents, helping her move from control to connection and from survival to safety.This conversation is a testament to resilience, repair, and the ongoing work of breaking generational cycles. It is a must-listen for any parent navigating trauma, identity, and the complex journey toward becoming the parent they needed as a child.What You’ll LearnHow childhood trauma resurfaces when you become a parentThe emotional impact of fostering when you were once in foster careWhy control and perfectionism show up in parenting after traumaThe transformative power of repair, apology, and emotional safetyWhat it means to separate your story from your child’sHow healing reshapes the way we respond, connect, and loveJoin the Parenting Different newsletter here: https://www.parentingdifferent.com/freeSubscribe for more episodes on adoption, trauma, identity, and parenting with truth and care.